


The Autumn Flame

by The_Twisted_Kingdom



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Belonging, Choices, Elucien - Freeform, F/M, Freedom, Home, Innocence, Loss of Virginity, Mates, Mutual Pining, Pining, Post-Canon, Slow Burn, The Autumn Court (ACoTaR), The Dawn Court (ACoTaR), The Day Court (Acotar), The Night Court, The Spring Court (ACoTaR), The Summer Court (ACoTaR), The Winter Court (ACoTaR), This won't leave me alone, True Love, there is so much pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:42:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 290
Words: 405,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24252277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Twisted_Kingdom/pseuds/The_Twisted_Kingdom
Summary: Months after the war, Lucien returns to Velaris to see Elain. He is unsure if he will be welcomed, but is pleasantly surprised when she appears open to spending time with him. He is even more surprised when Rhysand sees fit to send him and Elain across Prythian to visit a handful of the other courts in another effort to unite them all. He's not sure how things with Tamlin will go, and he's all but dreading taking Elain home to the Autumn Court to Beron and his brothers...
Relationships: Elain Archeron & Lucien Vanserra, Elain Archeron/Lucien Vanserra, Elucien, Feyre Archeron/Rhysand, Helion/The Lady of the Autumn Court (ACoTaR), Nesta Archeron/Cassian
Comments: 4164
Kudos: 1332





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> We're just gonna pretend that Frost and Starlight wasn't a thing because it gets in my way...

**Chapter One**

They were gathered on the couches and draped around the room. Elain watched the way Feyre settled herself on the arm rest of the couch that Mor was reclining in, wineglass in hand, and smiled at her sister’s easiness. She was pleased that the youngest of them seemed to be doing so well. Nesta’s straight back and blank features suggested that their older sister was not. Sparing a fleeting glance for the way that Cassian inched closer to Nesta, in what was clearly an attempt to engage her in conversation, Elain traced her hand along the bookcase she was inspecting, searching for something interesting to take up to bed with her for the evening.

“Come on,” Cassian’s teasing voice began, “I know you were reading something saucy this afternoon…”

“Do you?” Nesta’s voice was hard. 

“Yeah, you went bright red and shoved the book under a cushion the second you saw me.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

“Sure it does.” Cassian continued, “It means that you were reading something embarrassing… or you were trying to hide that you were busy so I wouldn’t be deterred from coming to speak to you… so, which one is it?”

Elain looked through the bookshelf to try and see her sister’s face, but Nesta was giving nothing away. Her sister looked as stoic as ever. “Maybe I just don’t like people in my business.”

Cassian sighed and flopped back against his chair. “I know you were reading smut.”

Shaking her head, and smiling, Elain returned her attention to the spines of the books she was currently stroking. Maybe she would ask Nesta what she had been reading later, and if it was any good.

“If you want some good smut recommendations, Cassian, I can help you.” This was Amren and Elain’s jaw dropped in surprise. 

“Ah… I’m good.” Cassian sounded more than a little put off. Amren laughed, as did Mor.

Elain reached the section of the collection on various plants from across Prythian and made a face. She’d been through the lot of them. She moved on further, toward the end of the shelf, liking the idea of asking Nesta what she had been reading more and more. Perhaps she could lure her sister to the bookshelf without alerting the others to what she was trying to do.

When Rhysand suddenly got to his feet, a thoughtful look on his face, Elain watched with interest. Feyre also sat up a little more straight, her eyes on her mate. “What is it?”

Rhys glanced briefly at Feyre before striding across the room toward the hall and the front door to the house. Elain looked back to Feyre who was chewing her lower lip. They heard the front door open and low voices as Rhys spoke to someone. A moment later footsteps indicated that he was returning, and a soft shiver moved up Elains back, beginning at the bottom of her spine and ending when it reached the base of her neck. She let out a slow breath when Lucien followed Rhys into the room. 

She stood half hidden behind the tall bookshelf, but his eyes found hers the moment he stepped into the room. Elain forced herself to draw a deep breath, unable to look away from the uncertainty in his russet eye as he looked back at her. It had been months since she had seen him, and she hadn’t really thought he would be coming back any time soon. 

Nesta was on her feet a moment later, and moving toward Elain. When her elder sister slipped an arm around Elain’s waist and held on to her, Lucien finally lowered his gaze before turning his attention back to Rhys who had thrown himself back into his low chair. The silence in the room was almost painful and Elain pulled a random book off the shelf before her, flipping it open for something to do, though she kept Lucien in her peripheral vision as she did so, unable to completely look away. Eventually, it was Cassian who spoke.

“So, you’re back?”

“…Yes.”

Elain looked up at him properly, then. His voice sounded strained and that uncertainty she had seen in his eyes was even more evident in his voice. 

“Well, you’re welcome to stay.” Rhys said, and Feyre nodded quickly. “For as long as you want.”

Lucien gave a smile of thanks, nodding. “I would appreciate that.”

Nesta nudged Elain in a questioning manner and Elain turned to her sister. “I’m fine.” She murmured, watching as Nesta clearly tried to read her face. Elain gave her a reassuring smile and eventually Nesta nodded and returned to her own chair. Elain remained by the bookcase, leaning against it, and turning the book she was holding in her hands over and over. 

She could feel him from across the room, she realised. Was that the bond? She could feel apprehension and uncertainty, and she realised that he hadn’t been sure he would be welcomed. Pushing away thoughts that weren’t her own, Elain tried to focus on what was being said. Rhys had just asked about where he had been and what he had been doing with that mortal Queen. Vassa, Elain recalled. 

Lucien was telling them that he had been travelling pretty much non stop since he had last seen them, but Elain found it hard to focus on what he was saying. Instead, she found herself looking him over. He looked tired, and more than a little uncomfortable. His hands fiddled with his cuff as he spoke, and his eyes flicked between Rhys and Feyre, and whoever asked him a question here and there. She wondered why he appeared so nervous, and she wondered if he had always been this handsome. His skin appeared almost golden in the low light of the room, and his hair appeared to shift in colour whenever he moved. 

As if sensing her thoughts, both of his eyes suddenly met hers, and Elain drew a surprised breath. He turned then, bending his head slightly so that his vibrant hair fell obscuring that fascinating metallic eye and he returned his attention to Rhys. Elain wondered if she imagined the sudden sense of shame and embarrassment from him, and she stepped back behind the bookshelf. Realising that the book she held in her hands was one that she had previously read, she replaced it on the shelf and selected one that she was not familiar with. It would do. 

*

Elain had spent the next hour or so sitting on a footstool, with her chosen book in her hand, pretending that she was listening to conversation, and that she definitely wasn’t staring at Lucien. He had talked about where he had gone. He had spoken of his search for a way to break the curse on Vassa, turning her into a firebird each day, but he had not said why he had returned now. Also, Elain noticed, nobody had asked him.

By the time everybody had gone upstairs to bed, she had selected a second book, in case the first proved disappointing, and was making her way to her bedroom, her head full of questions. Lucien had not spoken to her since he arrived, nor had she spoken directly to him, she supposed. She had caught him looking at her on more than a few occasions when she had tried to look at him, and she knew that he definitely had something to say to her. She wasn’t entirely surprised then when, as she pushed her bedroom door open, he appeared beside her in the hallway. “Elain…”

She drew a deep breath, before turning to face him. Any thought she might have had, or question she might have asked, vanished from her mind the instant she looked up at him. “Lucien…”

“Are you well?” He asked, and she could hear that nervous uncertainty still in his voice. She nodded, unable to help her eyes moving over him again. Apart from looking exhausted, he appeared okay. 

“Are you?” she asked, her eyes returning to his face. 

He gave a small smile. “Well, I have pretty solid plans to sink into a hot bath and not move for at least an hour and then probably sleep until lunch tomorrow…” he smiled at her again, “But yes, I’m fine.”

“I’m glad to hear it.”

He appeared surprised by her response and his hands fiddled for a moment. Elain thought he might be about to say something before he pulled a small book from his pocket. “I have something for you.” He held the book out and Elain took it carefully. “Look inside…”

“Oh.” She opened the cover to see a small purple flower pressed flat. Elain looked at it with interest. “I… do not know it.” She tilted her head, peering at the delicately pointed petals before she looked up at Lucien again to see him watching her avidly. “Thank you…”

“I found it growing by the lake that Vassa…” he broke off and looked at the flower before back to her face, “I hadn’t seen one before either, and I thought you might like…” He gave a nervous smile. She watched him sigh inwardly before he went on a little more quickly. “It made me think that I should come to Velaris to see you.”

“You came to see me?”

Lucien nodded, his eyes on her face. “I wanted to know how you were after…” his voice softened a little, “your father… I… Elain…” 

“It has been months.”

Lucien ran a hand over his face and through his hair. “Yes, I’m sorry.” He said gently, “I didn’t think you would have needed me…If I had thought you did I would have been here, of course…”

“I didn’t…” She had only meant to tell him that he’d done nothing wrong, but the look that crossed his face at her words told her that he’d taken other meaning from what she had said. “No… I…” Elain shook her head, “I just mean I’ve been okay. I’ve had Nesta and Feyre and … everyone has been very kind.”

“Good…” he murmured, “I’m glad…” His metallic eye whirred as he looked her over quickly, “I’m glad you’re alright. You do look… I mean… you look well.”

Elain traced a finger gently over the pressed flower. When she looked back up, she noticed that Lucien had taken a step or two back from her. “I hope you enjoy your bath…” she said, realising that he was finished with their conversation. He gave her a flash of white teeth as he smiled.

“Thanks.” He grinned again, “Usually do.”

A smile tugged at Elain’s own lips as she turned back to her door. She heard him begin to walk away before she looked after him once more. “Lucien…”

“Hm?” he turned back to her, halfway up the hall.

“I’m glad that you’re back…” She walked quickly into her room and shut the door, leaving him standing in the hall with an odd look on his handsome face.


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

The beautifully warm morning sun fell across Elain’s bed as she lay on her back, stretching comfortably. She was pretty sure she had not slept that soundly or deeply in months. Probably since before she had been forced into the Cauldron, she figured. Feeling relaxed and rested and, she realised, peaceful, Elain sat up and flung the covers back so she could get to her feet. Wondering what she would do for the day, she wandered over to her vanity and sat down, glancing at her reflection as she did so. Reaching for her hairbrush, Elain’s gaze fell upon the book Lucien had given her the night before, and she picked it up. She flicked through the pages, noticing that they were blank before turning to the front and looking at the flower he had tucked inside for her.

“Pretty…” she murmured, her finger tracing the pointed petals. She had truly never seen one like it before. He had said it had been what made him decide to come and see her. Elain picked it up carefully, twirling it between her finger and thumb. It was beautiful now, and she imagined it would have been even more so when alive. Glancing down at the book again, she noticed that while the rest of the pages had been blank, the first one was not. Under where the flower had been placed Lucien had written her name in his surprisingly elegant script. She noticed that he hadn’t just written it once, but had evidently gone over it several times, embellishing the letters, and she found herself holding her breath as she traced the letters with a finger.

“Elain?” the door opened and Feyre strode in, making Elain jump in surprise.

“You’ve forgotten how to knock?” Elain asked, carefully placing the flower back in the book and closing the cover.

“I’m the High Lady and you are my sister. Those are two reasons why knocking doesn’t apply to me.” Feyre threw herself on to the end of Elain’s bed. “So…”

“So?” Elain turned in her chair, facing her sister. Feyre eyed the small book in Elain’s hands, and Elain set it in her lap, covering it with her hands. 

“What’s that?”

“It’s…” Elain considered telling her sister that it was nothing, but she knew that if anybody was going to understand this confusing situation, it was going to be Feyre. She held the book out.

“Hm…” Feyre opened it and nodded, “I take it this came from Lucien?”

“Yes…” Elain twirled a lock of hair around her finger, “He said that he came to see me…”

“Well, he certainly didn’t come to see Nesta.” Feyre muttered, handing the book back to Elain who put it carefully in her lap again. “But that does bring me to why I came to talk to you.”

“Does it?”

“Yeah, what do you think about him being here?”

Elain leaned back in her chair a little. “I’m not opposed to it…” she said slowly, “It’s strange.”

“How so?”

“Before… when he last tried to … spend time with me, I was … lost…” Elain frowned, “Things were different then and I wasn’t ready for …. Anything like that.” She twisted her hair around her finger again, “And then there was the war and… father…”

“A lot has happened.” Feyre agreed, tilting her head. “And now?”

Elain looked at her hands in her lap. “I don’t know.” She murmured, “I’m glad he’s back… I would like to talk to him a little.” She looked at her sister again, “I don’t really understand this… bond.”

Feyre nodded, chewing her lower lip. “You haven’t accepted the bond yet, so it’s not what it will be…”

Elain leaned toward her younger sister for a moment, “I thought that I felt… for a second I imagined that I felt what he did. Last night, downstairs…”

Feyre nodded. “You can strengthen that with time and practice.” 

“Oh.” Elain fell silent, thinking about that. 

“Well, that’s all I wanted to know.” Feyre got to her feet. “Just wanted to check that you were alright.”

“Thanks…” She set the small book on the vanity and picked up her hairbrush. “Do you think…” Elain turned her eyes toward Feyre again as her sister moved for the door. “Do you think that I should?”

“Should?” Feyre asked

“Should get to know him?”

“That is your choice, Elain.” Feyre said simply, “But, yes.” Her sister opened the door, “You know that he was my first friend here… You should get to know him. He’s a good male.”

*

Lucien awoke well after breakfast, but before lunch. He felt more rested than he had expected, but he also discovered that he was practically ravenous. Deciding to waste no time, he flung the covers back from his bed and got to his feet. 

Mere minutes later, Lucien was hurrying down the stairs to try and find something to eat. He knew that breakfast would have been long cleared away, but there was always something to be found to eat around the place. If there wasn’t, he could always take a trip off into Velaris. He hadn’t seen much of the city the last time he had been here, but he had forced himself admit, at least to himself, that he liked it. He hadn’t wanted to, but he had. 

Cassian found him the moment he was down the stairs, and the Illyrian greeted him with a wide grin. “Guess you were really done for last night?”

“Tired, yeah.” Lucien gave a small nod. “The journey back really wiped me out.”

“You got plans?”

Lucien didn’t know if Cassian meant for the day, or for the future in general. He didn’t think that the other male was that philosophical, especially not in the hallway in the middle of the day, so he gave a slight shrug as he replied. “As of right now, my plan is to find food.”

Cassian smiled, showing off all of his teeth. “Priorities.” He clapped Lucien on the shoulder. “Most everyone else has gone for the day.” Lucien turned his head slightly. He could smell Elain somewhere close by. Cassian appeared to noticed this and nodded. “Elain is talking to Rhys…”

“About what?” Something squeezed at his heart. Perhaps she hadn’t been okay with him just showing up and she was trying to get Rhys to make him leave.

“I didn’t stop to eavesdrop.” Cassian said, “Also, I was trying to chase Nesta into coming with me into town…” 

“I don’t see her…”

“She left.”

“Right.” Lucien looked at Cassian. Apparently nothing had changed between him and Nesta in the months Lucien had been away. “Sorry…”

“Nah.” Cassian met his eyes, “If you ever want to have a drink. Just let me know.” The Illyrian smiled again, “Any and all drunken venting welcome.”

Lucien’s smile was genuine. “I’ll take that offer when the need arises.”

“Oh, it’ll arise.” Cassian said, turning to head for the front door. “Knowing this family…”

Lucien supposed that he was right, and let out a soft sigh as he headed into the dining room. There was a small basket at the end of the table with a lace cloth draped over it and a small pink flower beside it. As it was the only thing on the table, Lucien walked toward it and went to lift the lace. The moment he touched it, he knew that Elain had put it there. His mouth watered at the sight of several pastries in the basket and he sent a quick thought of thanks her way, before wondering at his instinct to do something so futile. It wasn’t as if she would have heard him. Maybe one day, if she accepted the bond. 

He sank into a chair as his teeth sank into a pastry and he resisted letting an audible groan out. He really had missed the food. Putting his feet up on another chair, he leaned back and finished the first pastry in two more bites. Whoever had made these deserved his personal thanks. And Elain. He would have to remember to thank her to her face. He wouldn’t have thought that she would even think to leave something for him to eat, but he knew without doubt that that was what she had done. The thought warmed him more than a little.

*

A warm rush of gratitude flooded Elain and she blinked in shock, pausing in the middle of her sentence. Rhys frowned, looking at her. “Are you alright, Elain?”

“Y-yeah…” she murmured, feeling her cheeks heat. “Uh…” She looked around her, trying to regain her thoughts. “What was I saying?”

“You were about to ask me something…”

“Oh, yes…” She smiled at him, “I… want to see more of Prythian.”

Rhys’ dark eyebrows rose in surprise. “Oh? Anywhere in particular?”

“No…” she replied, “I want to see all of it. The different courts…” She felt herself blush again, “Is… is that possible?”

He inclined his head, thinking. “I suppose...” he looked at her thoughtfully, “Why? May I ask?” he glanced toward the hallway, “You’re not… running away, are you?”

Elain understood that he was asking if she were trying to get away from Lucien. “No.” she said simply, “I had a thought…” She pulled the small book that Lucien had given her from her pocket and opened it to show Rhys. 

“It’s a flower…” he said, clearly trying to sound like he didn’t think she was mad.

“Yes, it’s one I’ve not seen before.” She said, unable to help the excitement creeping into her voice. “He said he found it where that cursed Queen lives. But, I started thinking about all the other flowers and plants that I have never seen and surely different courts have different flowers… What if I were to go to each one and collect them? I could document them. Some from each court. The courts or High Lords could even choose which ones I include and I could put them all in a book and then each court could have published copies of it…”

Rhys was looking at her differently now. “A way to connect us all…”

She smiled at him. “Wouldn’t that be nice?” She asked, “It’s been months since the war. I imagine checking in with one another and building new bonds would be beneficial.”

He smiled back at her. “Well, aren’t you clever…” his voice sounded like a soft croon and Elain raised an eyebrow at him. “I will see what I can do.”

“Thank you.” Elain got to her feet. “If anyone needs me, I will be outside.”


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

Nudging the door open with his foot, Lucien stepped carefully outside, a cup of tea held in each hand. He turned to try and close the door with the same foot, pleased when he managed without spilling anything on himself. When he turned back to the garden, he spotted Elain kneeling in the dirt seemingly trying to pull weeds out, although he could tell that she was watching him out of the corner of her eye.

“Good morning…” he fell silent then, not knowing how this was going to go. 

Elain sat back on her heels and looked at him. “Good morning.”

“I’ve brought you some tea…” he watched as she wiped her forehead with her arm, trying not to get dirt on herself, and he then realised how hot it was out here. “Although… maybe I should have gotten something colder…” He looked doubtfully at the tea in his hands. 

“No,” Elain dusted herself off and got to her feet. “Tea would be lovely…” She gestured to a blanket she had laid out under a nearby tree. Lucien headed toward her, his heart beginning to thunder inside his chest. He carefully passed her one of the cups and sank down on the blanket beside her, watching as she cautiously took a sip of the sweet tea. Mate. Touch her, smell her, taste her-

Lucien forced himself to look away, his breath catching as he struggled to get himself back under control. Those thoughts and desires had been easier to ignore, and had been far less prevalent, when he’d been half a world away. He’d almost forgotten how forceful they had been when he had been near Elain, when he could see her, when he could breathe in her scent. 

“You slept well, I take it…”

He looked back to her, his eyes catching on her curious brown gaze. “Yes, thank you.” He said, “I did truly need the rest, apparently.”

She gave a pleasant smile and her eyes moved around the garden as if searching for something else to say. “I left you some breakfast… Did you-?”

“Yes, I found it. Thank you…”

She just nodded and took another sip of tea. Lucien thought he might die. His heart was thundering so quickly and brutally that it was almost painful, and he was sure that she could hear it. She had once told him that she could. Why had he not come up with something to say to her? Since he had decided to come back, he had worried endlessly about how she might react to him. He had thought she might run away or just shut down. He had only dreamed that she would want to be anywhere near him, and he had not thought far enough ahead that he had come up with anything to try and talk to her about. “Can you still hear my heart?” the words slipped out before he could catch them.

Elain looked at him again, a small smile tugging at the corner of her gorgeous lips. “Would you be embarrassed if I said I could?”

Lucien felt himself blush. “Well, that’s a ‘yes’, then.” He said, running a hand though his hair.

“I can always hear it.” Elain murmured and he tilted his head. 

“Even when I was away…?”

“Yes. Fainter… but if I really listened it was there.”

He stared at her. He couldn’t help it. “Can you hear everyone’s?”

“Not anymore. I learned to tune them out.” She glanced quickly at him, “But yours is always there.”

“Sorry…” he said, “That must be annoying…”

“Not really.” She murmured, and he raised an eyebrow in surprise, “I guess it’s sort of … comforting.” He watched as colour filled her cheeks and she looked away this time. “When you were gone,” he was surprised that she was still talking about this, “I suppose it was how I knew you were okay.”

“I didn’t know that you cared.” He wanted to smack himself in the face.

Elain turned back to him with a frown. “I cared.”

Lucien tried to backtrack, “I just…” he shook his head, “I…”

“I don’t know you.” She said.

He tilted his head again, looking at her. The sun turned her hair into molten gold, and he could see that she was far healthier than the last time he had been here. He had barely begun to get to know who she had been then, but it was clear she was entirely different now. Elain blinked, her eyes meeting his. “It’s strange.” She said softly, “I feel like we know one another, but we don’t…” She fiddled with the teacup, “You don’t feel like a stranger… and yet when we speak, we’re still trying to maintain this strange formality…”

“Do you want to know me?” he asked, hoping that his thundering heart wouldn’t break though his ribs.

Elain nodded slowly and for a moment he thought his heart may just explode altogether. “Yes…”

He knew that his wide grin probably looked maniacal, but he couldn’t help it. “Perfect.” He said, leaning back on one hand, “Then, we can stop trying to be so formal.” He set his empty cup aside. “We can lounge casually and do all the casual things one does…”

“Do you know how to lounge casually?” Elain asked, amusement in her voice, “That doesn’t seem like something you’re familiar with…”

He sat up straighter again. “Well, maybe I’ll watch Cassian or Mor this evening and take notes.”

There was genuine warmth in her eyes when she looked at him then. He watched as her eyes appeared to catch on his scar and his left eye, and he looked away hating the regret and anger that flashed through him. Elain’s voice was gentle when she spoke again. “Can you hear my heart?”

He looked back to her, remembering that she had asked him that before too. He gave her the same response he’d given last time. “No, lady. I cannot.” The look she gave him was thoughtful, before she reached into her pocket and withdrew the small book he’d given her last night. For a horrible moment, Lucien thought that she was going to give it back to him. 

“You gave me an idea.” She told him, a small smile playing on her lips. 

“Oh?” Lucien watched the way she appeared to brighten as she opened the cover to look at the flower inside.

“I told Rhys this morning,” she went on, “I want to collect flowers from every court in Prythian.” She smiled at him, “I want to make a book. A collection of the prettiest or most unique flowers from each court. I’ll have where they’re best grown, how to care for them, any variations in colour or shape. Their scent…” Elain began to talk more quickly, and Lucien couldn’t look away from her, “I could include any special significance they hold for their courts, and I can draw them… maybe I could get Feyre to paint them, although I doubt I could bring them back in a healthy enough state for her to get the colours right while they’re alive. Oh! I could include what they feel like. There are some interesting yellow flowers over in that corner that feel like velvet when you touch them.” She indicated the far corner of the garden. “I could include descriptions of the entire plant. Maybe I could break it into sections. One for trees, and bushes and then just smaller… No, it should probably be by court… You’re smiling at me.”

He was. “I’ve never seen you like this.”

“I suppose I haven’t been in a while.” A light breeze blew a lock of her golden brown hair into her face and with it came a gentle shower of pink petals from the tree above them. Elain looked up with obvious pleasure as petals landed all around, “I love this tree.” Looking up, Lucien realised that the flower that had been on the table by the pastries this morning had come from this tree. When his eyes went back to Elain he saw that several petals had landed on her and, without thinking, he reached out and gently took one out of her hair. The petal was soft between his fingers, but not as soft as the lock of hair that followed it as he retracted his hand. Slowly, he let her hair slip through his fingers, meeting her eyes when he realised that she was watching him. Remembering that she could hear his heart, Lucien dropped his gaze to the petal in his hand. He felt an obscure sense of pity for it having fallen from its tree to land on something as lovely as Elain only to be plucked away by him. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Lucien saw Elain brush several more petals from her dress, a smile on her face. “Are there any more on me?” she asked, sitting straighter and looking at him. Lucien looked back at her and noted that there were several more in her hair. 

“Yes.”

Elain shook her hair, trying to dislodge them. “Well,” she said, reaching forward to flick a petal off his own shoulder. “… better?”

This time he asked. “May I…?” he leaned toward her and she nodded, sitting still so that he could get them off her. Lucien removed the two he could see in her hair, adding them to the other he still held in his hand. He studied them, feeling Elain studying him in turn. “So, Petal.” He slanted a glance at Elain with a grin, “Which flowers from the Night Court are going to receive the honour of being included in your book?”

He liked the way the very sun seemed to brighten when she smiled, her eyes going to her carefully tended garden beds. “I hadn’t decided.” She replied, “I suppose Rhys should have some say.”

“Maybe for one or two,” Lucien agreed, “But your opinion, as the person who likely knows the most about the topic, is also important.” The breeze shifted past them again and several more petals fell around them. Lucien reached forward and picked up a flower that had fallen whole before him, and then offered it to Elain. “You could draw this one.” She took it gingerly from his hand, holding it carefully. 

“Do you think it’s…” She looked around the garden, “I mean, it’s not…”

Lucien glanced around the garden at the array of arguably more impressive or quintessential Night Court flowers. “… worthy?” he asked, and she nodded, cradling the flower gently, and almost protectively, in her hand.

“You’re including more than one from each court, I take it?” She nodded and he continued, “You said you loved this tree.”

“I do.”

“Then if you like it, Petal, it’s worthy.” He replied simply. 

Reaching into his coat, Lucian withdrew a small pencil and handed it to her. Elain took it with a delicate smile and set the flower on her knee as she opened the book once again. He watched her flick to a blank page as she settled herself, letting out a small huff of a breath as her eyes focused on the flower, as if assessing its features. Lucien watched, unable to look away, as she drew her lower lip between her teeth and bit down gently, her attention focused entirely upon what she was doing. After several moments of watching her begin to try and sketch the flower, Lucien remembered that she was probably listening to his heart, and sought for something else to say so that she wouldn’t notice how it quickened as he watched her chew on her lip.

“I wish you had been able to see the Spring Court.” He said gently, “You would have loved it.”

“Feyre said it was beautiful.” She murmured, her eyes not leaving the flower on her knee.

“Beautiful doesn’t cover it.” He told her. “I suspect, that if you had been able to create a world, just the way you wanted it, it might look similar to the Spring Court.”

Elain glanced at him. “What an odd thing to say.”

Lucien felt himself blush. “I’m sorry, I-”

“No…” she said gently, her eyes on his face, “It was nice. I don’t think anyone has considered my perfect world, or even what I think about this one…” she looked back to her drawing. “People barely even saw me.” Lucien didn’t know how that could have been true. “I’d like to see the Spring Court.” She went on. “I told Rhys I wanted to see more of Prythian.”

“Ah…” Looking up as more petals fluttered down around them in the breeze, Lucien wondered how things might go with Tamlin in the future. It was unlikely they would be welcomed to just stroll through the gardens of the Spring Court as things currently stood. “Maybe one day things with Tam will calm down, and you’ll be able to see it…”

“Would you tell me about it?” She asked softly, and her dark eyes flickered his way for a moment. Lucien nodded, settling back a little so that he was more comfortable.

“Absolutely.” He said, before beginning to slowly describe the gardens and the flowers and anything that came to mind that he thought she might have appreciated, which was pretty much everything. Every time he looked her way, he was pleased to see a contented and peaceful look on her face while she listened to him, though her gaze remained on what she was doing. Lucien kept talking, telling her about everything he could remember in an attempt to make this moment last for as long as he could. This was the best he had felt in so so long. He would have loved for it to go on forever. Who would have ever thought he would end up in the Night Court, lying under a tree in Rhysand’s garden, while his mate sat beside him happily listening to him talk?


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four**

The air had grown chill by the time Elain had conceded that there was nothing further she could do in the garden for the day. She felt resistant to going indoors after the afternoon out in the sun had been so pleasant. She had sat under the tree with Lucien for quite a while as he’d told her about the Spring Court and how beautiful it had been, and Elain had let him talk. The change within Lucien had been evident as he had talked. Elain had been able to hear his heart slow as he’d grown more comfortable, and she could tell just by looking at him that he had been pleased that she had wished to hear what he had to say. It had been a pleasant afternoon, easy and relaxing. She had managed a satisfactory drawing of the flower, and had begun to scribble notes beside it, trying to work out a rough guideline for what she would eventually include in her book. She had then returned to weeding the small garden bed she had been working on previously, and her mood had been light and positive by the time she had collected her blanket to bring inside.

Nesta approached Elain the moment she came through the doors, and Elain smiled at her sister who took her arm. Lucien moved past them, carrying the empty teacups toward the kitchen. “You should have come in well before now.” Nesta said, frowning at her and slipping the grey shawl she wore off her slim shoulders before attempting to wrap it around Elain. “You’re cold.”

“I hardly noticed.” Elain replied

“Then, you should be more careful.”

“I’m fine, Nesta.”

Her sister cast a scowl in the direction Lucien had gone, ad Elain let out a soft breath. She knew that Nesta wasn’t Lucien’s biggest fan, but if Elain had accepted that he hadn’t been at fault for their kidnapping, then so could Nesta. Also, Elain was no longer that weak girl who had struggled to hold on to herself when she’d first come out of the Cauldron and the weeks that had followed. She was better now. She was stronger. Nesta no longer needed to try to shield her from everything and everyone. That included Lucien. If Elain wanted to talk to him, then she would. She just needed to find a gentle way to make that clear to Nesta without hurting her.

*

Having cleaned up in the kitchen, Lucien paused by the door to the hallway. He wanted to find Elain again, but he didn’t want to monopolise her time. She had spent more time with him outside than he had ever hoped for, and it had exceeded any of his expectations. It had been easy to be with her, and he hoped that she had felt the same way. He was almost positive that she had, or she would have packed up sooner. He wanted to talk to her more, but he knew that he probably shouldn’t push it. She needed time to herself, and with her sisters. The viper had glared at him the moment she’d seen him follow Elain inside, and he knew that he wouldn’t be welcomed to any conversation they may be having. Perhaps his best bet was to head upstairs to bathe and change before dinner.

Elain’s voice stopped Lucien in the hall, however. “Nesta, that’s not fair.”

“You should keep your distance.” Nesta said sharply. “You don’t know what he’s up to.”

“He’s not up to anything.”

“And how do you know that?”

“I can feel it.”

“You don’t know what you’re feeling.” Nesta said, “These new abilities can be confusing, and you haven’t properly even learned what you can do or what it means…And, you have other options…”

“What other options?” Elain asked, and Lucien could hear the tiredness in her voice.

“Do you think he’ll be the only male to look your way?”

“Nesta…”

“Do you?” Nesta pressed, “He doesn’t even have a court, Elain. He doesn’t belong anywhere. He can’t go home, and he can’t go back to Tamlin… He doesn’t fit here… Is that what you want your life to be?”

Lucien turned away from their voices, bitterness rising in him. He’d been about to head for the stairs when he came face to face with Rhys. He couldn’t tell if the other male had heard what Nesta had been saying, his face gave nothing away. 

“Come…”

Unable to think of a reason not to, Lucien followed him into a small study. “Have I done something?” he asked, feeling as if he was about to be reprimanded. 

“Not that I’m aware of.” Rhys said, dropping easily into a comfortable looking armchair, “Should I be aware of something?”

“…No.”

“There we go then.” Rhys looked pointedly at the chair opposite him until Lucien sat in it and met his eyes. “I have something to ask you.” Lucien just waited for it, not having any clue about what Rhys was after. “Would you have any interest as acting as my emissary?”

“What? Why?” Lucien asked, not trying to hide his surprise.

“Probably for the same reasons Tamlin asked you.” Rhys replied, “You know everybody, and you have a way with talking to people… You’re clever.” The dark haired male gave him a smile, “You’re good at it.”

“I don’t recall this admiration for my skills previously.”

Rhys’ smile turned twisted. “Oh, you got in my way plenty.”

Lucien grinned back at him. “It was fun.” His grin faded when he noted Rhys’ eyes go to his scar. “… not all of it, admittedly.”

“No.” Rhys agreed, “Not all of it.”

They looked at one another in silence for several moments. “What’s your game?” Lucien eventually asked. 

“It’s been some time since we checked in with the other courts.” Rhys responded, steepling his fingers as he looked at Lucien. “I want to do it properly. Formally. Something they can’t refuse, so you can get in and really see what’s going on. I want to know if everyone is as they claim.” 

“Why don’t you send Azriel?” 

“This requires more than secrets and shadows.” Rhys said softly. “And, it’s about being seen.”

Letting out a soft sigh, Lucien tipped his head back against the chair. He’d barely gotten back. With that thought his head snapped up and he looked at Rhys. “Are you trying to get rid of me?” he asked, “Keep me away from Elain?”

Shaking his head, Rhys held Lucien’s eyes. “Not at all.” He said gently, “I know how it feels, remember? I know how it feels to be parted from your mate when she hasn’t even accepted that he is your mate yet…”

“Of course…”

“I meant what I said last night.” Rhys went on. “You are welcome here for as long as you like…”

Lucien closed his eyes for a moment, Nesta’s words about him not belonging going through his mind. If he did this for Rhys he would have a purpose here, he would belong. At least, he would belong more now than he had before. “Okay,” he eventually murmured, “I’ll do it.”

*

Elain stumbled, pressing her hand to her chest. 

“What is it?” Nesta asked, “Did you eat today?”

“Yes.” Elain murmured, straightening. She smoothed her hair back, realising that the hurt that had washed through her so suddenly she’d been unprepared for it, hadn’t been her own. Lucien. She looked toward the hallway, wondering if she should go and find him. She couldn’t feel anything further through the bond in regard to what had caused that emotion, and she could hear his heartbeat continuing on at a regular pace. She would find him later.

“Elain…?”

“What were you reading yesterday?” Elain asked, and Nesta blinked at her. 

“What?”

“Last night Cassian said you hid the book you were reading when he found you.”

“…so?”

“So, what was it?” Elain asked. 

“Why?”

“…because maybe I want to read it.”

Nesta narrowed her eyes at her. “Do you?”

“If it was good, yeah.” Elain watched the way Nesta tilted her head before nodding.

“It was good…”

“Show me.”

She followed Nesta to the bookcase and trailed behind her elder sister. After several moments, Nesta pulled a book down and smirked at it before passing it to Elain. “Here…”

“What’s it about?”

“A High Lord’s daughter and her stable hand secret lover…” Nesta’s grin suggested to Elain that the book had been exactly what she had been hoping for, and probably exactly what Cassian had been suspecting. 

“Ohhh…” Elain looked at the book and then her sister. “Scandalous.”

“Thoroughly.”

“And Rhys has this on his shelf because…”

“Why don’t you ask him?” Nesta suggested, smiling in a way that Elain had missed, and in a way that she was sure Feyre had never seen. During moments like this Elain could almost forget the way that her sister was struggling with what they had become. 

“He’d probably tell me that he and Feyre like to re-enact their favourite parts…” Elain laughed at the look on Nesta’s face. 

“Elain!”

Elain just laughed again and thanked her sister for the book before heading upstairs for a warm bath.


	5. Chapter Five

**Chapter Five**

The next few days had passed in much the same fashion. Elain had gone out into the garden when the weather permitted, and after she had settled into what she wanted to do for the day, Lucien had come out to join her, always bringing something for them to eat and drink. He had begun going into Velaris to a bakery she had told him she favoured, and it had begun to be a habit for him to bring back several of the days’ special pastries or cakes. 

Already finding herself hungry, she looked up with interest as he slid the door open and stepped into the garden with her. 

“Wait until you see what they had today.” He told her, and Elain was already dusting her hands off as her stomach gave a desperate rumble of anticipation. If Lucien heard it, he pretended he hadn’t, although she could see the small smile on his lips.

“I’m ready.” She said, moving toward the blanket she had set up beneath the tree again. He carefully set the box down and flipped the lid open, casting a glance up at her as he did so. “Oh…”

“These…” Lucien began and Elain dropped down to sit on the blanket as she looked at the iced cupcakes in the box with what came close to awe, “are lemon flavoured.”

“They’re beautiful.” She murmured, her eyes moving from one to the next. Each cupcake was decorated with a different coloured icing and shaped to look like elaborate flowers. She lifted her gaze to Lucien’s to find him watching her, and she grinned.

“Too beautiful to eat?” He asked, and she could hear the amusement in his voice. Her stomach rumbled again and she made a face.

“It would be a shame to ruin them…” she said, “but…”

“Which one do you want?” he asked, seemingly unable to wipe the smirk off his face. Elain looked from him to the cupcakes, trying to choose.

“Mmm…” she bit her lip, “The purple one…” She watched as Lucien took it carefully out of the box and presented it to her. Elain accepted it, turning it around to make sure she got a good look at it before she let herself scratch a tiny bit of icing off to taste.

“…Good?” Lucien asked, picking up a green cupcake.

“Mhmm…” Elain swiped a finger through the icing before popping her finger in her mouth. When she looked at Lucien again, she found both his russet and gold eyes focused firmly upon her, watching her pull her finger from her mouth. She heard his heartbeat increase before he looked away. “I like lemon…” she said, looking for something to say.

“Thought you might, Petal.” He replied, before licking the icing off the top of his cupcake. Elain swallowed and settled herself closer to the tree in order to lean against it. She set about eating her own cupcake, enjoying the light lemon flavour and the fact that it didn’t make the cake too sweet to enjoy or, she thought, possibly eat several in one sitting. She watched Lucien finish his own and then lie back on the blanket so he could look at the sky. He closed his eyes, seemingly enjoying the sun on his skin. 

Licking the last of the icing from her fingers, Elain found herself unable to keep her eyes off of her companion. She knew that males often did not enjoy being referred to as ‘pretty’, but with his ruby hair, practically glowing like molten metal in the sun, splayed out around him, Elain thought that Lucien didn’t really look out of place among the rest of her flowers.  
“See something you like, Petal?” he didn’t open his eyes, but Elain knew that he’d somehow felt her watching him. Heat filled her cheeks, although she didn’t know if it because he knew she had been looking at him, or the fact that he kept calling her ‘Petal’ and she liked it.

“Tell me something interesting.” She said, trying to change the subject. His head turned toward her, but his eyes remained closed.

“In regard to what?” he asked. Elain’s eyes moved over the sun-kissed skin of his face, marred only by that scar from his brow to his jaw.

“What have you been reading?” she asked, having seen him perusing Rhys’ bookshelves on more than one occasion. 

“Well,” he said softly, lacing his fingers together and then resting his hands on his stomach. “I am currently reading first hand accounts of those who survived the last war…”

“With Amarantha?” Elain started when his eyes flew open and he looked at her.

“You know that name?”

“Feyre…”

“Of course.” She watched him draw a slow breath before he closed his eyes again, “There were so many who were displaced, and they were trying to find somewhere for a new life.”

“Must be sad…” 

“Some.” Lucien said, “But most of them speak of hope.”

“Where did they go?” Elain asked, curious.

“Wherever they could.” He answered, “Mostly they were spread across Prythian. There are some in all of the courts.”

“How did they find new homes?” She watched him drum the fingers of one hand on the back of the other for a moment.

“Followed work, mostly. There were trade fairs where those who were after workers in certain trades could gather to find those who could do the work. Those who sought work could go and find that work…”

“And this was before you were born?”

His eyes opened again and his golden eye whirred as he focused on her. “Yes.”

Elain nodded. “Feyre said you’re old.”

“Not that old.”

“Rhys is.”

“Indeed.” He smiled at her and Elain shifted to slide down until she lay on her back on the blanket also. Lucien’s heartrate quickened but he didn’t move. She closed her eyes against the sun and drew a soft breath, allowing the warmth seep into her. “What have you been reading?” he asked and Elain bit her lip. 

“Oh, I doubt you’d be interested.” She murmured, figuring he’d find it trivial compared to what he’d just told her.

“I am.” He said gently, “That’s why I asked.”

“It’s…” Elain was thankful she hadn’t begun the book Nesta had given her just yet, as that would have been wildly embarrassing to explain, “just a silly mystery…” she murmured, “There’s this spy from the Day court…” 

“Oh?” She felt Lucien turn onto his side to look at her, though her own eyes remained closed to protect them from the sun. 

“And he’s never left the Day Court before, but he has to travel to all the other courts… and it’s actually kind of interesting because it’s quite descriptive…”

“I can imagine.” Lucien said, “Is that where you got the idea to tell Rhys you wanted to see more of Pyrthian?”

“I’d been thinking that before then…” Elain said softly, “But it certainly has sharpened the desire.” She turned her head toward him before opening her eyes. Lucien was practically glowing in the sun. “You don’t think it’s silly?”

“Not at all.” He said, and she believed him. “Why would I think it’s silly?”

“I… don’t know. It’s not… serious stuff.” She looked at him, liking that he would listen to her without trying to interject, and that he hadn’t just dismissed what she had said outright as having no value. He hadn’t tried to make her choice of reading material seem inferior to his own like Graysen had always tried to do. Greysen had never shown interest in anything Elain had liked, and had often sought to make himself appear superior by trivialising what she read or tried to talk to him about. 

“If you like that kind of thing,” Lucien told her, “I might have a couple of similar recommendations, if you are interested?”

Elain nodded and smiled at him. “I suppose you’ve seen all the courts…”

“Yes…” his eyes moved back and forth across her face.

“And you’re Rhys’ emissary now…”

“I did agree to that, yes.” Lucien’s voice was soft again.

“Do you not want to be?”

“I…” He gave a light sigh, “I am glad to have something to do.” He told her, “Something useful. I’ve never been able to sit idly.

“No, I don’t imagine fire is good as being idle.” Elain suddenly sat up and looked at him. “Come on, then?”

Lucien sat up, looking questioningly back at her. “…come on where?”

She got to her feet and moved toward a garden bed that she had plans for. “Make yourself useful, then.” She picked up a garden hoe and thrust it out to him. Lucien eyed it and then the garden. She grinned when his eyes returned to her. 

“You want that cleared?”

“If you don’t mind.”

Taking the hoe, he gave her a lazy grin. “Anything you want, Petal.”

Elain tried not to watch when he shrugged out if his jacket before approaching the garden. She was very much enjoying her days out here like this. She enjoyed Lucien and his company, and she found herself more and more at peace with everything around her. As she knelt down to continue her work from earlier, she kept one eye on Lucien as he set about doing as she had asked. This was nice, she had decided. She definitely liked it.


	6. Chapter Six

**Chapter 6**

Releasing a shuddery breath, Elain turned the page. Her eyes skimmed the words of the book she held in her lap as she sucked her bottom lip in between her teeth and bit it gently. Nesta had been right, this was good.

_She gave a soft gasp as Rohan gathered her in his arms and sank into the fresh hay, taking her with him. Listening intently for a moment, she hoped that nobody had heard them. If her father found out, there would be no reasoning with him. But then, Rohan’s hands were moving under her dress and she forgot all about her father. Hurriedly, she sought to pull her dress up out of the way as Rohan set about undoing his pants. She gave him a pleased smile when he’d evidently managed that and his hand slid up the inside of her thigh. Pulling him down to her, she threaded her fingers through his silky golden hair as he settled atop her and she could feel that he was as eager to have her as she was to have him. Tightening her hand in his hair, she pulled his lips down to meet hers, his hands went to her hips as he pushed himself into her, sheathing himself between her thighs, and then he was thrusting with purpose._

Elain flung her bedcovers aside, relishing the cool air that rushed to caress her heated skin. Running a hand down her body, she shuddered at the tingles her own touch produced as she closed her eyes, picturing the scene again in her mind. When she noticed that the silky hair she had a hold of in her fantasy was ruby coloured she opened her eyes with a start. Puffing her cheeks, she exhaled a deep breath and tossed the book aside before sitting up. “Well…” said to nobody. She might have to save the rest of the story for later. She hadn’t expected it to have such an effect on her. Elain knew that if she were to touch herself now, she would find herself already wet with desire. 

Swinging her legs over the edge of the bed, she got to her feet. She needed a drink. 

Not bothering to grab her robe, as she was rather looking forward to the cooler air of the hallway on her flushed skin, she strode out into that hallway in her light nightgown. By the time she got downstairs to the kitchen, she was unfastening several of the uppermost buttons in order to let the air in further. She did not expect to find Lucien standing in the dark when she walked in, and she gave a small gasp. He turned to face her in surprise and a small light appeared at his shoulder, his metal eye glinting as he looked at her. 

“What is it?” he asked, that eye whirring as his gaze moved over her, “What’s wrong? You smell fu-” he broke off and Elain felt herself flush scarlet, realising that he could smell her arousal. Lucien cleared his throat. “Would you like some water?” his voice was clipped as he poured a glass of water from the jug next to him on the counter and slid it in her direction before backing away slightly.

Silently, Elain moved to pick up the glass and take a sip, promising herself that the next time she read anything sexy, she would definitely be bathing before she ventured out of her room. As she set the glass back down on the bench, she noticed that Lucien had gone very very still. Turning her head slowly, her gaze caught on his forearms where he’d braced himself against the bench, and she could see the strain there. It was taking a great deal of effort and self-restraint to control himself while he could smell her like this she realised.

She should run away. Elain knew this, but she suspected that if she ran, some primal instinct that he was currently fighting might take over and he might be unable to stop himself chasing her. Also, she didn’t want to make him think that she was afraid of him. Elain suspected that might wound him more than she would realise. She had to do something, however. Making her choice before she could overthink it, Elain moved toward him. 

Lucien’s eyes widened in fear and he staggered back, away from her, holding a hand out in front of himself. “Don’t…” 

Elain paused, looking at him. “Lucien…” she thought she might have heard him whimper when she said his name. “Lucien…” she said softly, moving closer again. He hit the wall, backing away, and stopped. Elain took another step, and he looked away from her, trying to focus on anything else. She trusted him, she realised, or she never would have dared to get so close. Able to see the torment clear on his face, she wanted to soothe him. When she was directly in front of him, Elain reached out and gently touched her fingers to his arm. The instant she touched him, Lucien’s eyes snapped to her face and the hunger she saw in them was startling. 

She could see the difficulty he was having breathing, and Elain suspected that he was trying to not breathe her in. “I’m not going to run away.” She told him, and watched as his eyes appeared to devour her. That metallic eye clicked and whirred as he made himself focus on her face again. He hadn’t moved since he’d backed into he wall and Elain pressed closer, her eyes still on his face. “I didn’t know you’d be down here. I’m sorry.” He remained very very still and, tentatively, Elain wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing closer again as she leaned into him. He drew a breath then and Elain closed her eyes, feeling the way he shook with the effort it took to control himself as his own arms came slowly around her. She could feel his heartbeat in his chest now as well as hear it as she always could, and it was powerful and erratic. “I’m sorry…” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

*

The moment Lucien’s arms were around Elain he felt the need within himself change. That driving desire to go to her, to get his hands on her shifted, and became more possessive. He tightened his hold on her, allowing himself to breathe her in now. He could still smell her arousal and it stirred something deep within himself. Bending, Lucien gripped her tightly and turned, lifting Elain to sit on the kitchen bench as he pushed himself between her thighs, pulling her flush against himself as he buried his face in her hair. Elain gasped in shock, but didn’t pull away. He felt her stiffen for a moment before her gentle hands came to rest on his back. “Lucien…” she murmured, “Please don’t…” he felt her shudder as he moved against her, “I haven’t…”

“I know.” His voice sounded more like a growl even to himself, “I can smell it.” Her hands tightened on his back and he forced himself to leash whatever it was within himself that was trying to drive him. When he spoke again he sounded more like himself. “I won’t. I promise. Just let me hold you.” He felt Elain relax at his words, one of her hands moving slowly up his back. _Mate. Touch her, smell her, taste her-_

He still wanted her, but he could be content with this. As long as he had her here, in his arms, not trying to get away from him, he could be happy. The flimsy nightdress she was wearing might as well have not even been there, and Lucien let one of his hands slide across the exposed skin of her back. Bending his head, he pressed his lips to the side of her throat, breathing in the light perfume of her hair and closing his eyes when she began to soothingly rub his back. This was okay, he told himself. When Elain began combing her fingers through his hair, he told himself that this was all he needed, that this was enough. She was his, in this moment. She had never belonged to anyone else. If he clung to that, he wouldn’t need anything further. The knowledge that that Graysen bastard had never had her helped to calm him. She was here, in his arms, her fingers moving through his hair, and he could accept that this was enough. She was his. This was fine. Cauldron help any male who might walk though that door, though.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Chapter 7**

Elain stared at herself in the vanity mirror. What had happened in the kitchen last night had played through her mind a million times since she had returned to her room and tried to sleep until dawn. She had allowed Lucien to hold her there on that bench until he’d gotten himself under control enough to loosen his hold on her, and she had slipped back to the floor. He hadn’t wanted to let her go entirely however, so she had allowed him to hold her hand as she’d walked back up to her bedroom. Elain had been unsure of what would happen when they reached her door, but Lucien had released her and stepped back, giving her the space to open her door and step inside. She had looked back at him to see him just watching her, and she had told him that she would see him in the morning. She had then closed the door and stood listening as he had retreated to his own room before she moved back to her bed. All night she had listened to his heart through the stones, and she knew that the feeling of embarrassment and mortification that kept flooding her was coming from him.

Until last night, Elain hadn’t properly realised how hard this whole situation must have been for him. She’d known that he’d felt the bond more keenly than she had, but she had not realised how much, or how strongly it could drive him. She had felt him struggle against it, even with her pressed to his chest, and she fully intended to ask him if it was like that all the time. She hoped not, because that would make the whole thing just entirely too cruel. Elain wondered if she should ask Feyre if anything like last night had happened to her, or if Rhys had dealt with trying to control himself in such a way. She suspected that Lucien would probably appreciate it if it remained just between the two of them, however. 

How had she known what to do? Elain had no doubt now that her decision to move toward Lucien when she realised what was happening had been the right decision to make. She might not have known exactly what she was doing at the time, but she could see that giving him the opportunity to touch her, to hold her, had been what had helped him to get control of that need that he had been struggling to leash. Perhaps that, too, had come from the bond. She really did need to know more about this.

*

Lucien paced the hallway. He had not slept a wink after what had happened last night. He had tried for hours, and then he had gone searching every bookshelf in the house to see if Rhys had copies of the books he’d mentioned to Elain the day before. He’d come up with several that she would probably enjoy, and he had discovered that the High Lord of the Night Court had only one. So, as soon as he knew the stores in Velaris were open, he’d gone into the city to find the others. He had returned not long ago, and he was now trying to work up the courage to knock on Elain’s door. 

He had no idea if she would even see him. He certainly didn’t deserve it after the way he had behaved in the kitchen the night before. He couldn’t believe he had just grabbed her the way he had to lift her to that bench. Running a hand over his face, Lucien groaned. “Shit.”

He needed to try. He needed to do this before the rest of the house was up and active and someone found out and killed him before he got his apology out. He needed to not be a coward. He didn’t know what he would say to her. He could promise that it would never happen again, but he wouldn’t lie to her. He did not know that he could promise that, because the next time she was strolling around the house smelling the way she had, it probably would happen again. What had she been thinking walking around like that anyway? She could have come across anyone. Granted, it was highly unlikely that anyone else would have reacted they way that he had, but just the thought of Elain coming across anyone else even just wearing that tiny nightdress set his blood alight. Snarling at himself to pull it the fuck together, Lucian tugged his hand through his hair. He was scared, he realised. He was scared that he’d ruined the gentle friendship that he had begun to build with Elain. She had been comfortable with him. If last night had shattered that, he didn’t know what he would do. So, he was scared of knocking on her door only to find out that she didn’t want to speak to him.

He would do whatever it took to make up for what he had done. He knew that. He would beg, do whatever she asked of him. He’d crawl through hell if he had to.

*

The knock on Elain’s door was not unexpected and she eyed it for a moment before calling for him to come in. She would have known it was Lucien, even if she hadn’t been able to hear his terrified heart right through the door. He didn’t quite meet her eyes when he opened the door, and she turned in her seat to look at him. 

“Come in…” she gestured for him to actually enter the room rather than stand at the door, and he did so, gently closing the door behind himself. He looked tired, and Elain was suddenly certain that he hadn’t slept at all. “Lucien…” she began, getting to her feet.

“Please.” He murmured. Elain stopped and just looked at him. Slowly, he lifted his gaze, that metallic eye whirring as he evidently tried to read her. “I am so sorry…”

“It’s okay.” She told him gently. 

“It’s not.”

“Lucien.”

“No…” he shook his head, looking frustrated, “I hate… I hate what I did.” She watched him try to figure out what he was saying, “I… that is not…” he raked a hand through his hair, “I know that I say things that I shouldn’t… but what I do… that is not something that…”

Elain moved toward him and his eyes widened in shock, but he didn’t step back from her like he had last night. “I know that you couldn’t help it.” She said, “I know that you fought for control. And I know that it was hard.”

“You walked toward it.” He breathed, looking at her through narrowed eyes. “Why?”

“I don’t know.” She replied, “Running away seemed like a bad idea. And… I could see you struggling. I wanted…” her eyes moved over his face. “I thought I could help.”

“You did help.” He told her, “How did you know that it would work?”

“I didn’t.”

“Elain…” She felt shame coming off of him then, “I swear that I never would have forced myself on you…” he shook his head “I promise. Never…”

“I know that.”

She saw doubt cross his features, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, Lucien.” She replied firmly, her words from the previous night coming back to her. _Please, don’t…_ “Do I need to remind you that I didn’t fight you?” she asked, “I went to you, and I made what I did not want clear. At no point did I worry that you would not listen to me.”

His relief was clear. Elain could see it in his face, and the way he stood. “I’m still sorry… and I’m embarrassed.” 

“You don’t have to be. Is it always like that?” she asked, “That… intense?”

He shook his head. “No… It’s always… there. It’s stronger when I’m near you.” His eyes moved around her room, “But last night, when you walked into the kitchen…” his gaze slid back to hers, “You smelled like…” 

Elain felt her cheeks heat. “Right…”

“It just slammed into me. I wasn’t prepared.”

“And now?” she asked, “If it happened again…?”

He shifted uncomfortably, but Elain waited for his reply. “I… don’t know.” He said softly, “Perhaps the same thing would work. If I could just touch you…” Elain nodded and his gaze slid to the floor between them. “I would understand if you don’t want-” he broke off when Elain strode forward and went up on her toes to throw her arms around his neck. After a moment, his free arm settled around her waist, and she waited until she heard his heart slow down a little before she released him. 

When she stepped back, she looked up at him. “If you can stand being around me,” she began and he frowned, “then I would prefer it if you didn’t start avoiding me.” 

“As you wish, Petal.” He replied, and Elain smiled in relief, satisfied that he wasn’t about to just disappear out of some misguided attempt to avoid hurting her. 

“Does that mean you’re still going to help me clear that garden out…?” She grinned when he nodded. “Good…”

“Also…” he held out several books that he’d had tucked under one arm, “These are what I was thinking of yesterday when you told me about the other one you’re reading.” He looked at the book sitting on her bed. “Is this it?” he went to pick it up, but Elain jumped in front of him when she realised that the book he was about to pick up was not the mystery she had told him about, but rather the book that Nesta had given her. 

“That’snotit.” She said hastily. 

The smirk Lucien gave her told her he knew exactly what kind of book it was. “Really?” he asked, and she had the distinct impression that he was using that golden eye to look right through her at the book she held behind her back. “And is that what you were reading last night before your little walk downstairs…?”

“Maybe…” Elain was pretty sure she had turned a colour that could rival his hair in vibrance. She also could have sworn that her answer had unlocked something else in Lucien that had relaxed. He gave her another smirk and tried to reach around her to grab the book but she leaned away, shielding it with her body. “No…”

“I’m curious to know what got you so worked up…” 

“No…” she tucked it under the covers, and then set the others he had given her atop it. She momentarily considered sitting atop the lot of it, but he would probably just pick her up anyway. 

“Okay,” he gave a dramatic sigh, “But if you want to bring it outside later for a little bookclub session out in the sun, I wouldn’t be opposed…”

“Not going to happen.” She folded her arms. Looking then at the pile of books on her bed, she smiled. “Thank you… for this.” She touched the one on top and glanced quickly back up at Lucien’s face. He looked from the books to her. 

“No problem.” His eyes moved across her face for several moments before he glanced at the door. “We should… get down to breakfast before Nesta comes to find you and skins me for being in here.”

Elain nodded her agreement. It was a possibility. “You’re right.” She watched as he gave her another smile before heading for the door and slipping quietly out into the hall. After a few minutes, Elain followed him, hoping that things between them really hadn’t been changed by the events of the previous night for the worse. She had been enjoying their developing friendship, and she didn’t want to lose it. She didn’t want him to leave again.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Chapter 8**

The chatter around the room only increased when Nesta stalked in and Cassian trailed behind her a moment later. Lucien saw the look Feyre and Elain exchanged and wondered just how well the sisters could communicate without words. Although the chatter continued as if nothing had happened, every pair of eyes traced the eldest Archeron sister as she moved to sit beside Amren on a couch by the fire. As if aware that everyone was watching her, Nesta scowled. When Cassian dropped down to sit alongside Azriel, Lucien tried to read Cassian’s face. The other was giving nothing away, though he was casting furtive glances at Nesta every few moments, although Nesta appeared not to have noticed, or was ignoring it.

“So what’s so important?” Mor asked after several moments, and all eyes turned toward Rhysand, as he was the one who had summoned them all. 

“You’re aware I’ve named Lucien as Emissary,” Rhys began, and Lucien sat straighter, crossing one of his ankles over his knee when everyone looked at him. 

“Serves him right.” Cassian put in, throwing Lucien a grin. “He can be a pain in the arse to everyone across the courts equally again.”

Lucien raised an eyebrow at Cassian, but the good-natured jibe actually pleased him, making feel as if he were becoming a part of the group.

“So, why don’t we get to share you around then?” Nesta’s voice was flat.

Cassian’s head whipped around to face her. “You’d miss me too much.”

“Doubtful.” She sniffed, lifting her wineglass to take a sip. Lucien watched Cassian narrow his eyes at her, before looking back to Rhys again.

“I intend to send Lucien to the other courts,” Rhys went on when everyone had returned their attention to him, “A public and open way for us to maintain contact, check on how things are progressing while being seen to be doing so. That way, none of the other High Lords will have a reason to deny the request, because everyone will be doing it…”

“Who first?” Mor asked. 

“Eris sent a message,” Rhys said, his tone more soft as he looked at her, “He’d like us to do it now. Apparently Beron is unwell…”

Lucien tilted his head. “He’s not…?”

“I don’t think he’s making a play for the throne,” Rhys said, his violet eyes flicking to meet Lucien’s gaze. “Not yet.”

Lucien stared at the fire. If his father was unwell, and Eris thought he stood a chance of taking the throne, would his brothers follow him? Would they come for him again?

“I don’t understand.” Elain’s voice brought Lucien’s attention back to the conversation. “Why would he want your Emissary in the Autumn Court while the High Lord is unwell…?” She paused, “Does he know it’s Lucien?”

“He knows.” Rhys’ voice was soft. 

“Then why?” Elain asked.

“I don’t know.” Rhys replied, “Could be that Eris has more control right now, and thinks it would go more smoothly.”

“Or they want to kill him.” Nesta put in emphatically. 

The room was silent and Lucien could feel Elain staring at him. “They can’t do that.” He said, turning to meet her eyes, “Not while I have the title of Emissary.” She nodded at his words and Lucien turned back to Rhys.

“They wouldn’t dare.” Feyre just about growled. Lucien thought they might dare, but they probably wouldn’t.

Rhys’ violet gaze was on him again and Lucien raised a questioning eyebrow before the older male spoke again. “You’ll be taking Elain with you.”

Lucien exploded out of his chair. The fire exploded and roared in the fireplace beside him as all he saw for a moment was red. He shook his head, trying to clear it. “Are you out of your fucking mind?” he demanded of Rhys? “I thought you were better than that… better than asking that of me…” Rhys didn’t respond, just watched him calmly. Lucien was not calm. All he could see was Jesminda on her knees in the hall, staring at him while he couldn’t get to her…

“Lucien…” Rhys began but Lucien turned away. 

“No!” he snapped, “Absolutely not!”

“You just said it yourself,” Rhys went on, “They won’t be able to touch you…”

Lucien gestured toward Elain, snarling at Rhys, “You cannot ask me to risk her!”

“I’m not.”

“There is no reason for her to be there!” Lucien was practically yelling by now.

“She’s a seer.” Rhys’ voice had not changed. Lucien glared at him.

“So?”

“So, they don’t know that.” Rhys said, “She’s also putting together a book of flowers from across Prythian. A perfect opportunity for the courts to all contribute to something together. It’s symbolic.”

Lucien looked to Feyre, hoping his friend would have something to say about sending her sister into danger, but Feyre’s eyes were on her mate. 

“Go to hell, Rhysand.” He muttered. Rhys just looked at him, and there was no movement or sound from anyone for several moments until Elain got to her feet and walked out of the room. Lucien wanted to follow her but Rhys spoke to him again.

“It needs to be soon.” Rhys said, “While Beron is-”

“I don’t give a shit!” Lucien snapped. “I’m not doing it.”

Rhys got to his feet, darkness appearing to swirl around him for a moment, and Lucien froze on the spot. “I have named you my emissary.” Rhys said, his tone dark, “That makes you an official member of the Night Court. As I am your High Lord, you will do whatever I tell you to do.”

Lucien just stared at him. “You sound like Tamlin.”

Rhys tilted his head and Lucien felt Feyre’s eyes on him. “I would not send Elain, or you for that matter, somewhere I thought you would come to harm.”

“Then don’t send her there.”

“While Beron is…”

“That makes it more dangerous!” Lucien cried, “They’ll think I’ve returned to challenge for the throne! Eris probably wants exactly that!”

“I doubt it.” Rhys frowned, “It’s more likely he’s wanting to establish connections he can use when the time comes for him take control.” Lucien noticed Mor leave the room, a disgusted look on her face.

“And if not?” Lucien asked, “You’re asking me to risk my mate…”

“She’s a seer.” Rhys repeated. 

Lucien turned this time to Nesta, hoping she would side with him. Nesta’s blue-grey eyes were firmly on Rhys, but she didn’t say anything.

“Right well, I’m leaving…” Amren got to her feet and walked out without another word.

“Yeah, I’ve got… things… to do… not here.” Cassian got up as well, “Az?”

“Yes.”

Lucien stood by the fire, unmoving as both Illyrians left the room before Nesta finally got to her feet and strode for the door, her eyes not leaving Rhys until she was gone. Realising he was alone with Rhys and Feyre, Lucien turned on them. “How can you ask this?” he looked at Feyre, “You know what they did to Jesminda…”

“I know.” Feyre said softly, “But this isn’t the same, Lucien.”

“She’s your sister.”

“And I love her.”

“Then…” he ran a hand through his hair.

“You will both be protected through the official visit.” Rhys said, his tone calm as it had ever been. “Nobody would risk touching either of you for fear of what we, and our other allies, would bring down on them.”

Lucien tried to calm down. “You want her there under the pretence of collecting for that book… While trying to use her ability as a seer? You want her to be your spy?”

“I have spies.” Rhys replied easily, “And the courts all contributing to her book is of legitimate benefit to us in fostering positive relationships, so she will be doing that. And if she happens to glean anything else while present, that would benefit us all too.”

Lucien looked back and forth between Rhys and Feyre. Neither of them moved or said anything further, and he realised that he wasn’t going to say anything to change their view. “… Fine.” He muttered, turning and striding from the room without a backwards glance.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Chapter 9**

Elain sat, her arms wrapped around herself, in the cool night air of the garden. It was dark, and quiet, and the stars twinkled overhead, almost as if she had company. She had heard Mor leave the house, and then Amren not long after that. She suspected Cassian and Azriel had also made themselves scarce, and she wondered what had happened in the sitting room since she had walked out. She had been more than a little surprised at Lucien’s reaction to Rhys’ announcement that she would be accompanying him to the various courts. He knew that she wished to see them, and she would have thought he’d have been pleased to have her go with him, no matter how unpleasant his family were.

If she hadn’t heard his heart growing louder, she might have been surprised when a coat descended around her shoulders, warm from where he’d clearly just taken it off. She looked up when he sat beside her on the stone bench. “You’re upset.” Lucien said softly.

Elain turned her head to look at him, taking in the tightness around his eyes. “You’re angry.” She returned.

Lucien sighed, leaning forward, his elbows on his knees, nodding silently.

“Why?” she asked, “I… thought you’d be pleased to have me coming with you…” She watched as he straightened, turning to look at her. He lifted a hand, as if to touch her, but appeared to think better of it. 

“It’s not about not wanting you with me, Petal.”

“Then what is it about?”

“I … don’t want you to get hurt.”

“You’ll protect me, won’t you?”

“Of course.”

“Then I’ll be fine.”

An odd look passed across his sharp features and Elain felt a heavy surge of sorrow and bitterness wash over her down the bond. “… what did Feyre tell you?” he asked, “About… why I left the Autumn Court?”

Elain shook her head. “Your father killed someone you loved.”

Lucien looked away, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he glanced around, searching for something to focus on. He didn’t say anything for a long time, and Elain found herself actively seeking the bond for the first time. If she could somehow figure out how… “Her name…” Lucien murmured, “was Jesminda.”

Elain went still, her eyes on his face as he turned to look at her. Pain was evident in every feature of his face and she remained silent, giving him space to continue. 

“She was a Lesser Faerie…” he said the words with a sneer, “And my father did not think it was appropriate for High Fae, especially one of his sons, to marry beneath them like that…”

“You were going to marry her?” Elain asked softly and he nodded, now looking at his hands. Swallowing a flush of unexpected jealousy, Elain shifted slightly closer on the bench. “So he killed her?”

“He had her executed in front of me.” Lucien replied, his voice devoid of any emotion. “He caught us before we could leave, had my brothers hold me down, and…” he shook his head, going silent again.

“Lucien…” Elain stared at him in horror. “I’m sorry… That… I…” she didn’t know what to say. Instead, she reached out a hand to him. The instant she touched his skin, however, something else rushed down the bond at her and her ears began to ring.

_Elain stood in a large hall before a long dais. Cold stone and dark wood rose around the walls, making the whole room look important and imposing, but an instant later it was the people surrounding her that caught her attention. Kneeling on the stone floor was a sobbing female faerie, her skin the colour of rosewood and her features pointy and feral. “Lucien…” the faerie cried, her eyes looking past Elain who turned and froze._

_Lucien, younger than she had seen him, without the scar that had become so familiar to her, and with two of his own eyes, was being held on his own knees on the stone floor as he struggled against the two other redheaded males who held him there. Elain stared. The bond was showing her this she realised. This was Lucien’s memory. She was in his memory, but not his mind…_

_“When will you learn?”_

_Elain turned her eyes on a tall faerie with brown hair standing nearby. His eyes were on Lucien and a sneer worked its way onto his face as he moved closer._

_“Let her go.” Lucien panted, struggling to get to his feet again, “Let her go and you can punish me…”_

_“Oh, I will.” Elain figured this was Beron, “You had your chance to get rid of her. I told you. I warned you there would be consequences.”_

_“It’s not her fault.” Lucien wrenched at his brothers’ grip, but couldn’t get free, “It’s my fault. Let her go, please…” he all but whimpered the final word as his brothers forced him forward onto the floor, and Beron gestured to one of the guards standing sentry by the double doors nearby. “No!”_

_Elain looked away from Lucien and back to Jesminda who had begun sobbing again when she realised what was about to happen. She tried to crawl away, but the guard seized her by her dark hair and yanked her back. Elain took several hasty steps forward, before stopping, realising that there was nothing she could do. This was just a memory._

_“NO!” Lucien screamed again, trying to get free, and Elain flinched when one of his brothers, who were clearly struggling to hold on to him kicked him in the ribs before forcing him to the stones again. “No… Jes…”_

_Elain shook her head. She didn’t want to see this. She felt sick._

_Beron stalked closer, his eyes still on Lucien, as if Jesminda was beneath his notice at all. “You will watch…”_

_Lucien ignored him altogether, trying to crawl across the floor now. “Jes…”_

_“Hold him.” Beron snapped at his elder sons and they bent to yank him back up to his knees, both arms twisted high behind his back so he could do nothing but watch as the guard who had hold of Jesminda pulled her hair back to expose her throat. Jesminda sobbed harder, her bony fingers scratching uselessly at the guards hand in her hair, and Elain watched with horror as the guard drew a long blade from his belt._

_“Jesminda…” Lucien’s voice sounded strange, but commanded attention and the female faerie’s eyes went directly to him. “Look at me.” He said, holding her gaze. “Just look at me…”_

_She did, keeping her dark eyes on him as the guard brought his blade down before her. “I love you.” Jesminda said softly before that blade was ripped across her throat, and Elain spun away with a cry, covering her face with her hands. She heard Lucien’s anguished scream and she shifted her hands to her ears, wanting it to stop.  
_

“Elain!” Hands shook her and Elain found herself sitting on the grass in the garden, Lucien kneeling before her, his hands on her arms. The second she saw him she burst into tears, before scrambling away to be sick in a garden bed. “… what?” he asked, “…what did you just see?”

Elain just cried, trying not to vomit on her hair. She felt him behind her a moment later, his hands gathering her hair back from her face and holding it gently. “I’m sorry.” She sobbed.

“…I don’t understand what just happened.”

“I… I didn’t mean to…” When she was sure she wouldn’t vomit again, Elain sat back on her heels. He let go of her hair and came to sit before her again, looking at her with concern. 

“Tell me what happened.”

“I don’t know.” She could feel tears continuing to fall, sliding down her face and she wiped them away, trying not to look at him, but failing to do so. “I… just touched you and then…” She saw the moment he worked it out.

“No…”

Elain tried to choke back a sob, and she nodded. The devastation that filled his face brought a fresh wave of tears and she gave up fighting it, and just cried, throwing herself forward to wrap her arms tightly around his neck. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry… How could they do that?” Lucien didn’t answer her, but she felt him shake his head and one of his arms went around her waist. 

She let him lift her to her feet, before he apparently came to the conclusion that she wasn’t about to walk anywhere, and he swept her up into his arms to carry her inside. Elain just cried as he carried her up to her bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them with his foot. Lucien set her carefully on her bed before striding into the bathroom. Elain heard him filling the tub before he appeared again. 

“You’ll feel better after a hot bath.” he said gently. She just stared up at him. How could he just go about his business every day after having had that done to him? Blinking, Elain reminded herself that what she had seen had happened a long, long time ago. Another tear fell, streaking its way down her cheek and Elain’s breath caught when Lucien strode toward her and carefully brushed it away. “I’m sorry that you saw that…”

“No…” she murmured, “I… I understand why you got to angry at Rhys…”

Lucien nodded. “I can’t… I can’t take it again.”

Elain lowered her eyes. She did want a bath. She knew that she wasn’t done crying, and it felt a bit ridiculous crying in front of Lucien when he had been the one to live it, while she had only been an observer. “I’m sorry…” she murmured, “It was private…” she looked at him again, “But I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s okay. You should know anyway…” He let out a low breath, “I had intended to tell you… Not like that, but I had wanted you to know.”

Elain got to her feet. She stepped closer to him again until she could go up on her toes to hug him. “If you want to tell me about her later, I’d like to hear it.” She said before releasing him.  
He raised an eyebrow at her. “You want to hear about Jesminda?”

She nodded again. “If you want to tell me.”

“Later.” He agreed, running a hand through his hair. “Your bath sounds ready.”

“Okay. Goodnight…” She watched as he quickly left the room, before she went into the bathroom and struggled out of her dress before she could settle herself into the tub. Sinking into the warm water, Elain allowed the tears to come again. She cried for Lucien, for what had been done to him by his own family just for loving someone his father hadn’t approved of, and she cried for the poor faerie who had been killed because she had loved him. When she was finally able to breathe without more tears coming, Elain wondered why the bond had seen fit to show her that whole horrible scene at all.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Chapter 10**

The gentle knock on Lucien’s door the next morning surprised him, and he opened it hesitantly. Part of him had thought it might have been Rhys wanting to speak to him about the previous night, but he was pleasantly surprised to see Elain standing in his doorway. When his brain got over the surprise, he remembered the way he had left her in her bedroom, tearstained and horrified, and he remembered what she had seen. Before he could ask her if she was okay, however, she had spoken.

“Will you come into the city with me?”

“Of course, Petal.” He tried to remain light-hearted, but anxiety clawed at him. “…is something wrong?”

“No.” she shook her head slightly, “Just… thought we might get breakfast at that bakery…”

Lucien nodded, looking her over. She was already dressed and clearly ready to go. “Now?”

“Yes…” She held out his jacket, the one he had put on her in the garden last night. Well, she knew what she wanted. Lucien took the jacket and put it on, stepping out into the hallway with her and pulling the bedroom door closed. 

“Okay, then.”

Lucien walked beside Elain, heading for the bakery she favoured. They hadn’t spoken much since leaving the house, but he could feel her eyes on him every few moments, and he wondered how her opinions on him had changed since that little vision she’d had last night. Did she think he could have saved Jesminda? Did she think he could have done more?

By the time they had reached the bakery and placed their orders before finding a pleasant spot to sit outside by the river and wait for their food, Lucien had built up an impressive bank of questions he had no answers to. He looked at Elain as she waved to a passer-by with a smile. It was evident that the people here knew who she was, and they liked her. How could they not? As someone else walked past their table and greeted her with warmth, Lucien watched the way she gave a genuine smile in return. It was as if she were the most beautiful flower in the garden, attracting all the bees. 

“What made you want to come and have breakfast here instead of at the house?” he asked. Those warm brown eyes turned his way and Lucien saw something else fill them as she looked at him. 

“I wanted to talk to you.”

“Ah.” He murmured. It was clear she had something she wanted to say to him without the others overhearing. Elain tilted her head, however. 

“Why do you look like you think I’m about to punch you in the face?”

Lucien gave a surprised bark of a laugh. “Do I?”

“Yes.”

“I just want to talk to you about The Autumn Court.”

“Oh…” He frowned lightly. “You still want to go?”

“I do.”

He forced himself to look up and meet her eyes. “I understand why you don’t want me to go.” She said, “I do.. and I’m sorry that it causes you alarm...” She paused when their food was placed before them before giving the faerie who had served them a bright smile of thanks, “Lucien, I think that it’s important. It’s important to do everything we can to ensure that all the courts continue to feel united… even if it is through my silly book idea.”

“It’s not silly.” He told her softly. “It’s a good idea. And, you’re right, it is important. I just…”

“I know.”

Lucien nodded and turned his eyes on his breakfast.

*

Elain watched Lucien push his food around his plate, clearly struggling with whatever thoughts were swirling around his busy mind. “… will your mother be there?”

He looked up at her words, that metal eye glinting in the morning sun. “My mother?”

“When we go to the Autumn Court. Will she be there?” She smiled, but then felt sorrow and longing wash over him and down the bond. He missed her greatly. 

“I think so.” He said softly. “I don’t see why she wouldn’t be…”

“I’m sure she’ll be pleased to see you…”

Elain’s heart lifted slightly when he smiled then. “Yes…” She smiled back at him, and then began pulling apart the small danish on her plate, trying to work up the courage to ask her next question. “Would you tell me about Jesminda?” Her eyes flicked quickly up to Lucien’s face and then back to her plate. He was silent for a while before he replied. 

“What would you like to know?”

Elain wanted to know if he was still in love with her, but it was not fair to ask that question. “… what was she like?”

The corner of Lucien’s mouth quirked up in a smile. “Wild.” He said. “She was the first thing you would notice when entering a room. No matter where you were or who else was there, it was always her.” Elain watched his face light up, his russet eye bright. “She didn’t care who I was. Right from when we met, she didn’t see the High Lord’s son, she just saw me.” Tears filled Elain’s eyes and she blinked them away before he could see. 

“You loved her.” She said softly.

“Yes.” Lucien met her eyes. “Very much.” Elain swallowed another unexpected twinge of jealousy at the heat behind those words.

“She loved you.” She knew that was true. “I could tell…”

“I know.” He murmured. “She refused to stop seeing me. I told her what my father had said, I knew that he would hurt her, and I told her for her own good that she should forget me. But, she wouldn’t. So, we were going to leave…”

“I’m sorry…”

Elain bit her lip when he suddenly looked up at her again. “What exactly did you see?”

“It was your memory.” She told him. “But, not from your perspective. It was as if I was just someone else in the room. An observer.” She frowned, “But I couldn’t have done anything…”

“Why did it show you that?” She knew he meant the bond.

“I don’t know.” Elain shook her head. 

“It was cruel to show you.”

“Maybe…” Elain began, “Maybe it thought it would help me understand you better.”

“By showing you one of the worst moments of my life?”

Elain held his gaze. “By showing me that you have endured unimaginable cruelty, but have not become cruel yourself.” She said, “You’re not cold or closed off. You feel everything, react to everything around you… You’re kind…” She closed her mouth to force herself to stop speaking. He was looking at her with interest. 

“Can I ask you something?” he was watching her warily, and Elain nodded. “Graysen…” Lucien said his name hesitantly and, Elain thought, possibly, through clenched teeth. 

“What about him?” she asked, surprised that she’d felt nothing at the mention of his name.

“Do you wish you were married to him?” He sounded casual, but Elain wondered if he was even breathing. He was so very still. 

She continued pulling the danish apart on her plate, considering. “… No.” she eventually replied, looking back up at him to see his reaction. “I don’t love him anymore.”

Lucien didn’t even try to hide his surprised reaction. His eyebrows shot up, and he stared at her. “I… I’m sorry.” He eventually replied, “I’m sorry you lost the future you wanted.”

Elain couldn’t look away from him. “I didn’t want a life behind those walls.” She said gently, “I wanted safety, and security.” She paused for a moment, “I like this better.”

“This?” Lucien asked. Elain gestured around them and he nodded, his gaze dropping to the table. “Ah.” He looked up again after a moment. “Is this your home, then?”

Elain looked around them, she watched several people walk past and then cast her eyes toward the Sidra winding through Velaris. “This is Feyre’s home.” She said gently, “So I’ll always feel welcome. I don’t know what Nesta wants, but… this isn’t my home. I’ve not found my place.” She looked back to Lucien, finding him watching her intently. She stared at him, and he stared back, and she knew that he didn’t have a home either. “We’ll find it someday.” She told him. “Home.” Deep longing crept toward her down the bond, and she gave him a small smile.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Chapter 11**

Lucien pushed open the door to the house and held it for Elain to enter. After breakfast, they had taken a walk by the Sidra and talked further. Lucien still felt a little weird about the bond showing Elain what had happened in his father’s hall all those years ago, but he rather thought that she was on to something in thinking maybe it would help her understand him better. She was no longer upset by the fact that he hadn’t wanted her going to the Autumn Court, and she understood exactly why he had had the reaction he had when Rhys had said she would be accompanying him. 

Lucien had been more than a little surprised at her confession that she no longer loved that Graysen bastard. He wondered when that had happened. She had still been wearing his ugly ring when he had left months ago to try and help Vassa. But, whenever it had happened, Lucien was pleased. He was glad that she was healing, and making space for her new life. He just hoped that there was space in her life for him. The last few days had suggested that there might be, and that thought sent warmth flowing through him. Elain looked up and smiled at him as she passed him on her way through the door and, not for the first time, Lucien wondered just how much access to his thoughts and emotions the bond gave her. She seemed far more receptive to everything he felt lately, while he so very rarely got a sense of her at all. He thought, perhaps, the fact that Elain was a seer might help her to use it more easily than he could. He supposed that she probably had higher walls in place between them than he did as well. One day, he hoped, she would lower them and let him in.

“You’re back.” Feyre strode toward them the moment Lucien had closed the front door after himself. 

“Yes,” Elain began gently, “We went for a walk…”

Feyre’s eyes flicked from her sister to Lucien and he received a raised eyebrow from his friend, which he deliberately ignored. “Were you looking for us?” he asked.

“Yes, Rhys wants to speak to you both.”

Humour drained from Lucien and he straightened, wondering what else was about to be thrown at him. Elain looked up at him and then followed Feyre down the hallway toward where Rhys was obviously waiting. Just as he moved through the doorway, Nesta brushed past Lucien, on her way to Elain. He watched the elder sister slip an arm around Elain’s shoulders, and fix her steely gaze on the High Lord.

“Nesta…” Rhys greeted her smoothly. 

“I want to hear what you’re going to tell her.” Nesta replied, clearly without any intention of leaving. 

“Of course.” Rhys replied, “It’s not as if I intended to hold a secret meeting and exclude you.” Lucien moved closer, not knowing how he would react if Rhys told them he wanted them to leave for Autumn right now. “Eris has responded to my request for a timeline for your visit.”

“Ugh.” Lucien sank into a chair, noticing from the corner of his eye as Elain leaned around Nesta to look at him. He gave her a quick smile and looked back to Rhys.

“He believes we have some time, so I’ve decided you’ll go to Spring first, and once done there you can easily cross the border through Autumn.”

Lucien didn’t move. 

“Spring?” Nesta sneered, “To that-”

“Yes, Spring.” Rhys said, cutting her off, as his violet eyes flicked to the eldest sister, and then back to Lucien. “Are you prepared for that?”

Drawing a deep breath, Lucien tried to force his racing mind into forming a response. “Ah… I can handle Tam.” He felt Feyre looking at him and shifted his gaze to her. She was frowning as she seated herself on the corner of Rhys’ chair. “You have an opinion, Feyre?”

She tilted her head as she looked at him. “If he’s… angry…” his friend began, and her eyes moved toward Elain. 

“I will protect Elain…” he said, frowning.

“Of course.” Feyre murmured, looking at him again, “I wasn’t doubting that…”

Lucien let out a soft breath. “I know Tam.” He said, “Probably better than anyone at this point. I know what sets him off, and I know how… to … avoid that.” He’d had to walk on eggshells for years living at the Spring Court. 

“Excellent.” Rhys said, “You should go and pack what you intend to take with you.”

“When are we going?” Elain asked.

“This afternoon.”

“What?” Nesta asked, “So soon?”

“Tam will have to let us stay if we arrive too late to send us back…” Lucien said, understanding what Rhys was paying at. “It’s a hospitality thing. He’s a stickler for things like that.”

“Oh, how civilised.” Nesta sneered. Lucien just glanced at her before looking back to Rhys.

“You’ll send word when you want us to head to the Autumn Court?”

“I will.”

Lucien nodded, glancing at Elain. “Okay.”

*

Elain sat on her bed, the bag Feyre had given her sitting beside her. She had several dresses in it, everything she would need from her vanity, and she was now flicking through the pile of books she had sitting beside her bed in her ‘to be read’ pile. She didn’t know how long they would be gone, so she was having trouble deciding what would be too much. 

Picking up three of the books Lucien had given her, she put them in her bag and bit her lip. Surely they would be enough. Her door opened without warning and Elain was unsurprised to see Feyre stroll in. Her sister flung herself on Elain’s bed and rolled onto her back.

“Are you packed?”

“…Not really.” Elain murmured.

“Are you nervous?”

“What do I have to be nervous about?” Elain asked, even as nervousness swirled within her. “Rhys said nothing will happen to us.”

Feyre let out a huff. “Tamlin can be… unpredictable.” Elain slanted a glance at her sister. 

“You think he will…”

“I’m more worried about Lucien.”

“Why?” Elain asked, frowning. “They were friends, surely…”

“Lucien considered the Spring Court his home.” Feyre said, “Tamlin was his family… I’m worried about what will happen to him if that’s never repaired. If it’s something else he’s lost…”

“Do you think they can repair it?”

“I don’t know.” Feyre murmured, “I hope so.”

“I’m concerned about the Autumn Court…” Elain turned to better face Fayre, “I saw… the bond showed me what happened to Jesminda.”

“It showed you…” Feyre sat up to meet Elain’s eyes. “You mean like…”

“It was Lucien’s memory.”

“You saw it?”

“Yes.”

Feyre swore, running a hand through her hair. “Does he know?”

“Yes.”

“…was it as bad as I imagine?” Feyre’s voice was soft, and Elain just nodded. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Elain said, the words barely more than whisper “But, when we get there… He will have to face them. His father and brothers…”

“Elain, he would have been there many times as emissary for the Spring Court over the years.” Feyre took her hand, “It wont be the first time he’ll be back there.”

“No,” she breathed, “But he’s scared they’ll do the same thing to me.”

Feyre’s eyebrows shot up. “Did he tell you that?”

“No,” Elain replied, “But I know it. He doesn’t need to say it.”

“Well, like Rhys told you, you’re both protected during these visits. That wont happen.” Feyre squeezed her hand, “So… the bond…”

“What about it?” Elain looked away for a moment. She had no idea how to answer any question about the bond. She did not know how to use it, she did not know why it showed her things, she didn’t even know if it was going the other way and Lucien could feel what she did as often as she was hit with his emotions.

“You’ve not accepted it…”

“No.” Elain replied quickly.

Feyre looked her over for a moment, “Are you okay going away on your own with Lucien?”

For the first time, Elain contemplated how improper that might have seemed. She dismissed that thought a moment later. If she hadn’t even considered that up until this point, then it didn’t matter. “I… Yes, I think so.” She said. 

“Not worried about…?”

“You think he’d behave inappropriately with me because of the bond?” Elain couldn’t help the flashes of what had happened in the kitchen the other night from forcing their way to the front of her mind. The way Feyre’s eyes widened told Elain immediately that her sister had just seen exactly what she had been imagining. “FEYRE!”

“Sorry,” Feyre gasped, her hand coming up over her mouth, “It wasn’t intentional!” Elain got off the bed and moved around the room aimlessly, trying to avoid looking at her sister. “…that was… when was that?” Feyre sounded curious.

“The other night…” Elain caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She was scarlet. 

“…Did he…?”

“No!” Elain gasped, whirling around to look at her sister. Feyre raised her hands in mock surrender. 

“Okay…. Okay…” 

Elain tugged her hands through her hair. “He couldn’t help it…” she said, “Was… have you… was Rhys …ever like that…?”

“You want me to tell you about the mating frenzy?” Feyre smirked, and Elain felt her own eyes widen. “Or just the sexual need in general?”

“Not really…”

“Sometimes,” Feyre went one, as if Elain hadn’t spoken, “as soon as I enter a room, Rhys will just be on me.” She gave Elain another smirk and though Elain tried to turn away, she couldn’t, “And there’s nothing either of us can do to resist it.”

“Really.” Elain tried to sound as if she wasn’t burning inside. 

“Mhmm.” Feyre nodded, “Trust me. When you feel it you’ll realise there’s no fighting it.” 

Elain blinked. Lucien had. He’d fought it for her.

“Right…”

Feyre scooted to the edge of the bed and got to her feet. Elain stared at her sister’s hand, outstretched toward her. “… if you show me what happened, I could help.” Elain knew that her sister didn’t need to touch her to enter her mind, but it was a way for Feyre to show her that she was asking for permission this time. Nodding, Elain stepped toward her. She had originally thought to keep it to herself, knowing that Lucien had been embarrassed by what he had done. Feyre already knew, so she saw no harm in explaining further. Especially if it helped. Taking her sister’s hand, Elain allowed Feyre to see everything that had happened that night.

When Feyre let her go, Elain moved to sit on the bed once again, not looking at her sister until she spoke first. “… well.” Feyre’s voice was soft and Elain flicked her gaze to her. “I…” Elain just watched her sister. Feyre ran a hand through her hair and bit her lip. “He …”

“He didn’t hurt me.” Elain said, feeling the need to defend Lucien though she wasn’t sure why.

“I didn’t think he did.” Feyre moved closer to her, her voice low. “I take it you know how hard he fought against those instincts… That was not easy, Elain.” Feyre paused, “I don’t think just anyone could have done that.”

“Yes.” Elain replied, “I know.”

“Does Nesta know?”

“No!” Elain gasped, “And don’t you tell her!”

Feyre gave a low chuckle, and then glanced at the door. “They’re nearly ready.” She said, “… so… even after that happening the other night, you’re still comfortable going with him?”

“Yes.” Elain told her, “I trust him.” She twisted her hands together, “That just proved to me that I can.”

*

The firm knock on Lucien’s door told him that his time was up. He picked up his pack and strode to open the door, expecting Elain, or even Feyre, to be waiting for him. He did not expect to see Nesta standing in his doorway, her hands on her hips. 

She pushed inside past him, and Lucien hastened to get back out of her way. “Nesta…” He watched her. Her posture was perfect and she was one of the most formidable creatures he had ever seen. She was terrifying. Cassian was a brave male, he decided. “…what can I do for you?” he asked, when she still hadn’t spoken. Instantly, her steely eyes flicked to him, and Lucien resisted the urge to run. 

“If you allow anything at all to happen to my sister, I will kill you.”

Lucien couldn’t even think of a witty reply. “Nothing will happen to her, I swear it.”

“It had better not.” Nesta’s eyes swept over him. “If you don’t bring her back, I will come for you. Even if you try to hide, I will find you.” Lucien believed her.

“Nesta,” he said softly, “I know you don’t trust me,” he ignored her snort, “But I would do anything for Elain. I’ll protect her.”

Something in her face softened, and Lucien watched as she took a hesitant step closer. “I… know you’ll try.” She said, her voice more gentle than he’d ever heard her speak to him before, “I’m just saying… try harder.”

“As you say, Lady.” He gave her a slight bow as Feyre called to him from up the hall. Nesta’s eyes swept over him one more time before she swept from the room. Lucien drew a shaky breath and picked his pack up once again before heading out into he hall and down the stairs to where Rhys was waiting for them, ready to take them to The Spring Court and whatever mood Tamlin happened to be in.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Chapter 12**

Shouldering Elain’s bag over his own, Lucien eyed the path that would take them to Tamlin’s Estate. Rhys had left them just over the border, and Lucien had shown Elain the direction in which they had to walk.

“It isn’t too far.” He said, and she just smiled at him. “Let’s go…”

“I can carry my own bag…”

“I know.” He replied, “But it makes me feel useful.” Lucien gave her a grin and Elain actually rolled her eyes. 

“Yes, you have no other purpose, Emissary.” The laughter in her voice made his heart dance around his chest, and it took Lucien longer than he would have liked to notice that Tamlin didn’t have sentries where he once had. 

Stepping closer to Elain, Lucien made sure to keep his gaze searching around them for any hint of a threat as they walked. “Thank you for allowing me to contribute.” He smiled when Elain noticed the change in the land around them. As the plants and trees grew more lush, her eyes began to dart around them more frequently and she appeared to grow more and more excited.

Before long, they were approaching the house and the grand gardens came into view. “Elain, Petal…” Lucien began, slowing his pace a little. Elain dropped to walk with him, her head tilted to listen to him, though her eyes were taking everything in and a wide smile had worked its way on to her face. “When we find Tamlin,” he went on, “until it’s clear what mood he is in… stay behind me.”

Her brown eyes darted up to his face for a second and Lucien gave her a reassuring smile. Her smile faded and a light frown appeared between her eyes. “Do you think he will try to hurt you?”

“I’m not sure.” He said softly, sensing a slight panicked feeling coming from her. “He wont hurt you, though.” He told her, wishing he could wrap an arm around her shoulders or touch her in some way. “He’s not like that…”

He saw the doubt in Elain’s eyes and he wondered what Feyre had told her about Tamlin.

As they walked through the gardens toward the front of the house, Elain’s worry seemed to war with her amazement, and more than once she had paused for a moment just to look at a flower here and there. Lucien had stopped by her side, taking in the empty grounds, and wondering what else Tamlin had done to push the rest of his court away. “Come on, Petal.” He said, smiling at Elain, “You will have plenty of time to marvel over the beauty of this place once we find the High Lord.”

She made a small sound of protest that sent a flush of heat through Lucien but she followed him toward the steps into the house. “Lucien…”

His name on her lips had Lucien stopping and turning to look at her. Elain stood on the step below him, her eyes still out roving over the gardens of the Spring Court. “Yes, Petal?” He lifted a hand, wanting to touch her. 

“You were right…” she breathed, still looking at the gardens, “If I could have created my perfect world… it would look like this.” Affection flooded Lucien as he looked at Elain, and he allowed himself to gently lay his hand on her shoulder. She looked around at him, and colour filled her cheeks before she lowered her gaze. “Sorry…” she murmured, her eyes moving to the doors. 

“No…” he replied, “I’m glad…” She stepped up beside him and they headed inside. 

Tamlin was where Lucien had imagined he would be. Trying to keep his face neutral, he approached his old friend, making sure he remained in front of Elain as he did so, trying to gauge the blond’s reaction as he drew closer. 

“Lucien…” Tamlin’s voice held a sneer.

Lucien stopped a respectable distance away, feeling Elain come to a stop one step back and just to his right. “I assume you know why we are here…?” Lucien asked, “The High Lord of the Night Court requests that-”

“Yes, I can read.” Tamlin retorted, “I read Rhys’ letter…” Lucien stiffened when Tamlin’s green eyes went to Elain and stayed there. “Hm…” the older male mused, “It’s a pity you never fucked the oldest sister, Lucien. You could have had the whole set.”

Lucien felt Elain’s shock and out of the corner of his eye he could see her staring at him. “I never touched Feyre.” He told Tamlin flatly. 

“How could I tell?” Tamlin snarled, “You betrayed me in so many ways…”

Swallowing his rising anger, Lucien schooled his face into his courtly mask. “We request that you allow us to update the other courts on the progress of the Spring court, as outlined in the letter you received.” He paused, “And that you allow Elain to roam freely on the grounds in pursuit of the composition of her book on flowers across Prythian.”

Annoyance flashed in Tamlin’s green eyes as he looked Lucien over, and Lucien braced himself against the bitterness he felt. “Fine.” Those eyes went back to Elain, “You may have access to whatever you require.”

“…Thank you.” Elain’s voice sounded steadier than Lucien suspected his did.

“Well,” Tamlin looked back to Lucien, “you’ve arrived too late to get anything done today. I take it you remember when dinner is?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Tamlin got to his feet. “I have a patrol to check. You will be given a room.”

“… two, if you don’t mind.” Lucien said, knowing that Tamlin would be able to understand what that meant instantly. The blond gave him an amused smirk.

“Oh?” Tamlin asked, “So much pining for your mate… and she hasn’t even taken you?” Clenching his jaw, Lucien just met Tamlin’s eyes. Loathing. Loathing and disgust swirled in that green.

Before Lucien could make any kind of reply, Tamlin had walked away, leaving him and Elain both standing in the hall. 

*

Even the walls were pretty. Elain sat on the bed in the room she had been given, and let her eyes move over the walls, taking in the prettily painted roses and tangled vines covering what appeared to be every inch of free space. The whole place was lovely, and she found it strange as it was in such contrast to the High Lord who ruled over it. Tamlin had not returned by dinner, so she and Lucien had eaten together in the dining room, and then returned upstairs for the evening. She was glad to know that he was just across the hallway, but was also glad for her own space. 

After she had felt all kinds of emotions coming off of Lucien earlier, Elain suspected that he was probably thankful for his privacy as well. She had been able to see, even without the bond, that he had struggled to maintain his composure the moment Tamlin had begun to speak. Feyre had been right, they needed to repair whatever relationship was left between them, Elain she didn’t know how that might come about. It was clear that Tamlin was still quite angry and, even now, across the hall, Elain could feel Lucien’s sorrow. Evidently, he had been hoping that Tamlin might have been even somewhat glad to see him. She had felt Lucien’s devastation when his old friend had looked at him with what came close to hate. 

Hearing his heartbeat approach, Elain was already getting to her feet before she heard his knock at her door. Opening it, she stepped back to let him in and went back to sitting on the edge of the bed to look at him. “Are you alright?” She asked, watching him.

“Yes,” Lucien turned to her and went down on his knees before her, taking her hands in his as he looked up at her. Elain blinked in shock. “What he said,” he breathed, russet eye bright, “about Feyre. It wasn’t true.” 

“Okay…” Elain murmured, 

“It’s not true.” Lucien repeated, “Feyre and I never had that kind of relationship. Never.” He released a shaky breath, his eyes never leaving her face, “I swear it.” Desperation for her to believe him washed down the bond, and he squeezed her hands. “Please, Elain… You have to know that. Please believe me.”

Elain believed him, she could feel the truth of it through the bond. “… why does he think you did?”

“She… Feyre tried to make it seem that way. When she was spying for Rhys.”

“What if Tamlin had have killed you?”

Lucien looked away then. “Guess that part of her plan would have sucked for me.” Elain felt the hurt coming from him; hurt that Feyre hadn’t seemed to have considered the risk to him. Gently, Elain pulled one of her hands from his, noting the regretful expression on his face as she did so, before lifting her hand to brush some of Lucien’s red hair back from his shoulder. His eyes met hers again and she allowed her hand to rest on his shoulder as he watched her. 

“You will never be overlooked like that again.” She promised him. 

A funny expression worked its way onto Lucien’s face, before doubt replaced it. “That’s nice of you to say, Petal.” He replied, “But experience tells me you can’t promise something like that…”

“I can.” Elain said simply.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Chapter 13**

_  
Amarantha’s cold laugh echoed through the cavernous chamber, and Lucien grimaced as he was forced to his knees and his wrists were tethered tightly to the whipping post. He tugged fruitlessly, knowing that there was no give in the knots. “You really ought to learn your lesson, Lucien.” She walked around in front of him so that he could see her without having to turn his head. “I would have thought the last time you opened your mouth in front of me that I left enough of an impression for you to remember…”_

_Lucien tried not to think about that lesson, but she laughed again, just as she had before she’d ripped his eye out. “I guess not.” He ground out, and she actually smirked at him, before looking over his head. Lucien knew Tamlin stood there, unmoving and silent._

_“How many lashes do you think?” Amarantha asked Tamlin conversationally. Lucien closed his eyes. He had known she would punish him for calling out to Feyre during her challenge, but if he hadn’t Feyre would likely be dead and they would all be ruined. “It needs to be enough so that he won’t forget to keep his mouth shut again… Maybe it should be the other eye…”_

_“Twenty lashes?” Tamlin’s voice was expressionless and Lucien grimaced again._

_“This is not his first offense…” Amarantha’s voice was pouty, and Lucien knew that wasn’t good. “Fifty, I think.” Lucien’s eyes flew open and he looked at her. She smirked back at him, her red lips stretching wide as she held the whip in her hands up for him to see. Shuddering, Lucien closed his eyes again. He didn’t need to see it. “Come and take it.” Lucien listened to the footsteps come around him toward where Amarantha had stood. After several moments of silence, he opened his eyes again and stared in horror as Tamlin took the whip from the bitch’s hands._

_“…Tam?”_

_His friend’s green eyes flicked toward him, and Lucien saw the regret. He should have known that Amarantha wouldn’t have just anyone administer his punishment. Straightening himself as much as he could, Lucien drew a deep breath and kept his face neutral, for once thankful for the mask he wore. When Amarantha nodded, one of her guards stepped forward and ripped Lucien’s shirt open down his back. She giggled, clearly enjoying herself, and Lucien spared but a glance for her before fixing his gaze on a spot on the wall as Tamlin circled back around behind him. Staring at that spot, Lucien was determined to not give Amarantha what she wanted. She loved suffering and he wasn’t going to give it to her._

_“Hurry up…” Her voice was impatient, and Lucien could feel his friend’s hesitation._

_He heard the whip moving through the air before pain exploded across his back. Lucien clenched his teeth and forced himself not to look away from that spot on the wall._

_“Count.” Amarantha told him. “Out loud.”_

_“One.” He said flatly. Pain exploded again, and his breath caught._

_“…if you miss one, we start again.”_

_“…two.” This was ground out between his teeth._

_“Be clear.”_

_Lucien stared hard at the wall, tears welling when the whip was brought down across his back again. “Three.”_

_It didn’t take long before Lucien’s resolve began to slip and he’d begun to cry out as the whip came down on him again and again. Tamlin was barely pausing between lashes, maintaining a predictable rhythm and Lucien’s screams rang in his own ears, sometimes breathless as he struggled to draw breath around the pain. He never missed the count though, and by the time he’d whimpered “Fifty”, he’d allowed himself to collapse, hanging helplessly from the whipping post only held up by the rope around his wrists._

_Forcing his eyes open again when he felt Amarantha bend down in front of him, he just looked blearily at her, struggling to focus. “Don’t bother trying to heal yourself.” She whispered, another wicked grin stretching those ruby lips, “Those lashes wont heal until I say so…” Horror spread through Lucien’s foggy mind. His back had to be a mess. Fifty lashes would have left him barely any skin at all. If she was going to keep him from healing… He let his eyes close again as he willed his mind to escape. He’d rather be anywhere else. “Clean him.”_

_Through his pained haze, Lucien was vaguely aware of a salty scent before cold water crashed down over him and he screamed.  
_

Elain sat bolt upright with a shriek. She imagined she could still feel her back aflame from that whip, and the brain jarring agony of salt water being dumped over her. Nausea rocked her with the realisation that what she had just been dreaming wasn’t some fiction her mind had created, but another of Lucien’s memories. Feyre had told her that he had saved her life during her first challenge Under the Mountain, and that he had been punished for it. Lucien had been too injured to come and help her, and that had been what had pushed her to make her bargain with Rhys. Her sister had never elaborated on what had happened to Lucien, if she even knew. 

Realising that she could hear Lucien’s heartbeat thundering from across the hall, she bit her lip. Something was wrong. Knowing that she wouldn’t go back to sleep for a good while, Elain slipped out of bed and headed across the hall. She knocked lightly on his door, but received no answer. “Lucien?”

His heart continued its wild thundering and Elain placed her hand on the door. Unbidden images flashed before her eyes again. Lucien lying on a narrow bed on his stomach, hands clenching handfuls of the sheets as he groaned in pain, his back an open mess of lash wounds. Nobody helping him. Nobody had come. Tamlin hadn’t come. That knowledge made Elain’s choice for her, and she turned the door handle, pushing the heavy door open enough for her to slip into his room.

She could smell him. His scent was stronger here than anywhere else Elain had been. Casting her eyes quickly about the room, she realised that this must have been his room for the decades he’d lived in the Spring Court. She took in the Autumn Colours that he had decked the room out in, and drew another breath. This room was utterly male; utterly _Lucien_. This had been his home for longer than she had been alive. 

Padding quickly across the crimson carpet, Elain approached his bed. His sheets were twisted and messed, as if he’d been thrashing and Elain stopped beside him, her eyes moving over his sleeping form. Lucien lay on his back, the sheets kicked low around his waist and his broad chest was bare. His heartbeat still thundered loudly in Elain’s head. “Lucien…?” she murmured. He didn’t stir. “Lucien…” Elain reached a hand out to touch him, hesitating for a moment as to where. Touching her fingers gently to his shoulder, she knelt one knee on the mattress beside him. “…Lucien?”

His eyes opened in an instant, and then he was on his feet beside her, one arm half around her protectively. “What’s wrong?” he breathed. Elain blinked in surprise, one of her hands coming up to press against his sculpted chest. 

“I…”

He’d half turned, looking around before coming to the conclusion that there was no threat. The fire flickered to life in the fireplace, and his hold on her lessened, though Elain noted he didn’t entirely let her go. “… You’re in my room.” He said softly. She could feel something stirring within him. This was his space. She’d walked into his space of her own free will, had approached him in his bed. Her own heart began to beat more quickly and she cleared her throat. 

“I had a dream…” she breathed, feeling Lucien’s hand tangle into her hair, holding her carefully to himself. 

“What about?” he asked. 

“You.”

“Oh?” she heard the note of hopeful amusement there, and regretted having to squash it. 

“Under the Mountain.” She said gently, “During those trials Feyre had to do…”

Lucien slowly released her and sank back down to sit on his bed. Elain stood where she was, looking down at him. She felt the moment he thought he’d worked it out. “… the punishment I received?” he asked, “For helping Feyre?”

“Yes.”

Horror filled his russet eye as he looked up at her. “You saw that?”

“It was different this time.” She replied, “I… I was you…” She bit her lip, “Looking through your eyes, thinking what you thought, feeling what you felt…”

“You…” Fear replaced the horror, “you felt it?” his hands were on her again, coming to rest on her sides. Elain realised she was only wearing a tiny sheer nightdress. 

“…Yes.”

“Shit…” he breathed, “Elain…” both his eyes moved back and forth across her face, that metal eye clicking and whirring as he thought. His hands pulled more tightly at her, “Shit… shit…”

Elain stepped in to him, giving in to the pull. Lifting a hand to brush his hair back from his face, she listened again to his heart. “…you were dreaming about it, too?”

“I was.” He murmured. Elain allowed him to pull her down to sit beside him on the bed. “I’m so sorry…” his eyes moved across her face again, “I … I didn’t mean to send it to you.”

“I know.” Elain kept a hand on Lucien’s arm. “Was that really what happened?” she asked. “Fifty…?” She felt her eyes widen when he gave a single nod, his eyes not shifting from her for a moment. “And Tamlin did it…?”

“Yes.”

“You forgave him?”

“It wasn’t his fault.”

Elain didn’t really want to ask the next question, but did so anyway. “He didn’t come to help you after…?” she moved her hand down his forearm, “… Did anyone?”

Lucien’s gaze finally dropped from her, but instead followed her hand on his arm. “Amarantha…” he breathed the name softly, “kept me like that for a week. She didn’t let me heal… and anyone who had come to help me would have been punished similarly.”

Frowning, Elain shook her head. “That… isn’t an excuse.”

“Maybe not, Petal.” He told her softly, “But I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else to face that. Not for me.”

Elain stared at him. If the Autumn Court was as cutthroat and bloodthirsty as Feyre had told her, how had Lucien come from there? She knew her fingers were lazily tracing the skin of his wrist, but she couldn’t make herself stop. When his eyes lifted from her hand to her own eyes, he looked at her in a way Elain hadn’t seen yet. 

“What else happened to you?” She asked, “Under the Mountain…?”

He shook his head and gave a soft sigh. “You don’t want to know…”

“I do.”

Lucien paused before giving her a wry smile. “Then I will tell you, but not tonight…”

His heartbeat had slowed to just about normal, and Elain let her eyes move over him once more. He was magnificent in the half-light, she had to admit. The firelight was picking up all the different oranges and reds in his hair, and his sharp features looked even more striking than usual. He was half turned toward her, and as Elain allowed her eyes to travel over him again, his free hand slid around behind her. “Lucien…?” she asked, when that hand slid up her back and then inside the top of her nightgown, moving carefully over her spine.

“Just checking…” he murmured, retracting the hand. “You said you felt it… I wanted to make sure it was nothing more than that…”

“It stopped the moment I awoke…” Elain, suddenly feeling bolder, brought her own hand back up to Lucien’s shoulder before sliding it gently over and down his back. “You didn’t scar…”

“No.” he replied, and she felt him shudder at her touch, “I guess she figured it would detract from her first masterpiece.” He gestured at his face and Elain shook her head. She could hear his heartbeat quickening, and he was looking at her more intensely than before. The heat from the fire seemed to be increasing and Elain struggled to focus. 

“I… I should go back to bed.” She murmured, getting to her feet. There was a moment of hesitation before he let her go, and Elain stepped back from the bed, looking at him as she did so. “I’ll see you in the morning…”

“Goodnight, Elain.”


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Chapter 14**

“Tamlin!” Lucien snapped exasperatedly as the High Lord tried to walk around him. “You cannot keep ignoring everyone.”

“Not everyone.” Tamlin sneered, wheeling around. “Just you.”

“This cannot continue…” he tried to be reasonable but Tamlin shook his blond head. 

“The only reason you’re here is because you’re playing Rhys’ emissary.” Tamlin’s lip curled, “You’ve traded sides.”

“There aren’t sides.” Lucien replied, “And if there are, we’re on the same one.”

“No.” Tamlin snapped. “No, we’re not. You betrayed me. You took Feyre and you left. For him.”

Lucien’s blood heated. “You drove everyone away.” He replied, “With your selfishness and petulance.” Tamlin sneered again, but Lucien was pissed off now. “You act the victim, but you betrayed me too!”

“How?” Tamlin looked indignant. 

“You didn’t lift a finger to help me Under the Mountain…”

Tamlin’s green eyes narrowed as he looked at Lucien. “If you’re referring to what Amarantha made me do…”

“No.” Lucien replied, “I know you didn’t have a choice about that. I’m talking about when you were going to let Rhysand rip me apart for Feyre’s name…”

Tamlin had the good grace to look uncomfortable. “I was trying to protect her…”

“I know that.” Lucien said, “And I kept silent because that’s what you wanted. But the fact remains you would have let me die to protect her name. Which gave the bitch no more power over us than before… It was such a small thing, that you apparently decided was worth my life. Thankfully, Feyre disagreed. Everyone always has to suffer for what you want.”

“I took you in when you had nowhere to go. I gave you a home!”

“And then you ruined it!”

Tamlin bared his teeth. “You think I ruined it?”

“You let Ianthe walk in here and do as she pleased.” Lucien paused as disgust flowed through him. “You sent me into that cave in your place…”

“I couldn’t…”

“You knew I hated her!”

“I...” Tamlin stood taller, “I am the High Lord…”

“And that made it your responsibility!” Lucien cried. 

“I couldn’t!” Tamlin hissed, “I couldn’t bear the thought of… knowing that Rhysand had Feyre…” Anger simmered in his green eyes, “Do you imagine you could go and engage in the Rite right now if I were to go upstairs and crawl into bed with your little mate…?”

A snarl slipped out of Lucien before he could leash it at the thought of Tamlin’s hands on Elain. “It’s not the same.”

“Is it not? You love her don’t you?”

“I was not the High Lord.” Lucien insisted, “It was not my responsibility and Feyre is not your mate!”

Tamlin launched himself at him with a roar, and Lucien wasn’t ready. He hit the wall before he’d even realised that the older male had thrown him across the room. Barely noticing that he was sliding toward the ground, Lucien struggled to stand upright again before Tamlin’s hands had seized him once more. Pain seared his shoulder when those terrible claws sprouted, ripping into his flesh. Lucien didn’t want to fight Tamlin. He never had. Even if he did want to, he would never have been able to beat him. Nobody stood a chance against Tamlin when he got like this.

*

Straightening her dress, Elain slipped out into the hallway. Her stomach was rumbling and she was really looking forward to seeing what kind of delicious food was served for breakfast in the Spring Court. She suspected it would be absolutely delightful. It would be perfect way to begin the day before she let herself go outside and explore the majesty of the gardens. She had been able to see them from her window this morning and, from such a height, they had looked even more breathtaking than she had imagined.

As she was descending the stairs, a roar rang out through the house, and Elain froze. Scuffling noises followed and she continued down into the hallway leading to the dining room. Gasping as she stepped into the room, Elain watched as Tamlin landed a powerful blow to Lucien’s face, knocking him to his knees before dragging him up to his feet and beating him again. 

“Stop it!” She yelled hurrying forward.

If they heard her, they made no show of it. Tamlin threw the redhead away from himself, and Elain shuddered at the sound as Lucien hit the far wall and collapsed to the floor. Tamlin advanced on Lucien, still on the ground, those awful claws raised, deadly and terrifying, ready to rip Lucien apart, and fear spiked through Elain at the thought.

Surging forward, Elain threw herself to her knees in front of Lucien, her arms out wide as she glared up at Tamlin. “Stop!” she cried again. She saw the moment he tried to pull himself back, but it was too late. His claws ripped through her arm and across her chest before he recoiled, pacing to the other side of the room. Elain fell back against Lucien with a whimper. She could feel him struggling to push himself to his knees behind her, hear the wrongness in his breathing, but she kept her eyes on Tamlin whose claws retracted as he looked back at them. Regret was clear in every line of his face before he turned and fled the room.

“Elain…?” Lucien’s voice sounded wrong, and she turned to look at him. He was still struggling to push himself off the floor, so she leaned forward and helped him into a sitting position against the wall. “Are you okay?” he asked, barely able to open his russet eye. Elain nearly whimpered again looking at him. Blood was soaked into his shirt from where Tamlin’s claws had ripped at his shoulder, and more blood trickled from his split and bruised lips. Worse, was the wheezing sound she could hear every time he tried to draw a breath.

“Lucien…” she whispered, “What happened?”

“Tried to talk… to him…” 

Elain shook her head, her eyes moving over Lucien in an attempt to survey what was wrong. “Can you stand?” she asked. She wanted to get him upstairs to try and do what she could, and she didn’t want Tamlin to walk back into the room and continue where he’d left off. Lucien nodded, but groaned as he tried to do so. Elain pulled one of his arms over her shoulder, trying to help lift him.

It was a struggle, but they eventually made it upstairs and to Lucien’s room. She carefully sat him on a low chair and hurried to collect some water and towels from the bathroom. Kneeling before him when she had everything she could find, she looked up at him again. “Can you heal?” she asked, her eyes moving over him slowly. “I… I can clean you up… but…” She knew she couldn’t do anything about whatever was wrong with his breathing. She didn’t think he’d ever been this silent for this long, and it was beginning to scare her. Tears of fear pricked at her eyes, and she blinked rapidly, looking down to focus on the towel she was dipping into the basin she’d collected. 

“Elain…”

Elain made herself look back up at him. She watched as he looked her over in turn, his gaze coming to rest on her arm and chest, evidently taking in the burning clawmarks she hadn’t so much as looked at herself. Glancing down at them, she frowned at the blood running down her arm and staining the pale blue fabric of her dress. Deep gashes marked most of her arm and halfway across her chest. When Lucien lifted a shaking hand to her, she looked back up to meet his eyes. He set his hand on her shoulder and Elain shuddered as a pleasant warmth seemed to spread throughout her. When she looked down again, it was to see smooth skin. 

“What are you doing?” she gasped, “Heal yourself!”

“It will take longer.” He murmured, his hand falling from her shoulder. Elain went higher on her knees, lifting the damp cloth in her hand, and hesitating only a moment before she brought it gently to his face, trying to wash away the blood. 

“But you can?” she asked softly. 

“Yes.” His eyes closed for a moment, “Just a couple of scratches… maybe a few broken ribs…”

Noticing her own hand shaking, Elain lowered it quickly back to the basin of warm water. “Has he done that before?”

“Yes.”

Elain tried to keep her focus on the wet cloth as she carefully wiped more blood from him. When his warm fingertips found her shoulder again, not moving, but presenting a steady presence nonetheless, she lifted her eyes to his. “Are you healing yourself?” she asked.

“I am.” His voice was soft, but Elain supposed that was the truth as he was now able to open both eyes properly to meet her gaze. “… nobody has ever put themselves in front of me like that.” 

Elain held his gaze, unable to look away. “It was instinct.” She replied, not knowing if it had been her own instinct, or because of the bond.

Lucien’s fingers slid down her arm to her elbow, holding firmly. “Don’t do it again.” He breathed, “If Tam loses it again… don’t… you could have…” fear slammed into Elain down the bond and she swallowed thickly. Pushing it back at him, she raised her chin slightly. 

“I won’t just stand there and watch him kill you.”

“If it’s you or me, it’s better if it’s me.”

“It doesn’t have to be that way.” Her voice was higher than she had intended, “If that’s where we are, then let’s go back.”

Lucien’s hand on her elbow drew her closer and Elain leaned into him a little. She noticed that the horrible wheezing noise when he breathed had disappeared and something inside of her eased. “It’s okay.” He murmured, “Hopefully he’ll have calmed down by this evening.” 

Elain dipped the cloth in the warm water again and returned to what she had been trying to do. Lucien was watching her with half closed eyes, and she suspected his energy was going into trying to heal himself. She could feel the disbelief and wonder coming from him, enamoured with the fact that she had thrown herself between Tamlin and himself. Having always had Nesta and Feyre to protect her, Elain didn’t know how it would have felt to have someone do that for the first time, but she could feel his desire to pull her to himself and hold her. As she began trying to clean his shoulder through the hole in his shirt, she began to see his healing take effect, and relief flooded her. Eventually she dropped the cloth into the basin and left it there. “Are you healed?” she asked gently. 

“Not quite.” His reply was soft, “I need to rest a bit.” Elain glanced toward his bed. 

“You should lay down.”

“Yes…” He made no move to get up and Elain looked him over. 

“And take that shirt off before you do. It’s covered in blood…” 

She watched him do so, moving gingerly and clearly cautious of his ribs. When the ruined shirt hit the floor beside the basin of water, Elain couldn’t help herself. She reached a hand out to carefully touch the place where deep puncture wounds had marred his skin not five minutes earlier. 

“Impressed?” he asked, just the tiniest hint of humour behind his flat words.

“It’s remarkable.” She replied softly. He gave a grim smile and struggled to his feet, Elain shooting to hers to try and help when he took an unsteady step. 

“Elain…” he breathed her name, an arm coming loosely around her. Elain stood still, allowing him the contact. When he realised she wasn’t going to pull away, his other arm wrapped around her, and he pressed closer to her. Leaning into him, Elain closed her eyes, resting her cheek against his bare skin, which was surprisingly hot to the touch. He felt like he was on fire inside, and she wondered if that was the healing still doing its work. When she felt Lucien rest his chin atop her head, she allowed her arms to loosely encircle his waist, thankful that he was in once piece and that she hadn’t gotten downstairs five minutes later. “Thank you.” He breathed, tightening his hold on her just a little, “Risking yourself for me… Thank you.” Elain pulled back just enough to look up at his face. He looked tired, and utterly spent, but he was looking at her intensely, and she could feel him hoping desperately that she would know how much he truly meant what he was saying. Not knowing what to say in response, she just nodded, holding his gaze. He bent enough to press his lips to her forehead and then he had released her and was moving toward his bed once more. Elain took the basin of water back to the bathroom and hung the wet towels out before coming back to check on him once again. 

Lucien was lying on his back, his eyes closed and his breathing even and normal. Watching him for a moment, Elain decided that he was okay and would be better off if she left him to sleep. “… I’ll be back later.” She murmured quietly, unsure if he was even awake and heard her or not. Then, she turned and headed for the door, figuring that she needed to change her own clothes and take a bath before retrying to find something to eat.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Chapter 15**

It was the most beautiful place Elain had ever seen. She had wandered the gardens around the house for about an hour before she allowed herself to stop. It hadn’t seemed right to sit in one place without at least seeing more of the garden first. She hadn’t seen all of it yet, but at least she had made a start. Sinking down onto the soft grass beside a large lattice laced with purple roses, Elain gave a pleased sigh. This was exactly what she had needed after the morning’s unpleasant event. Being out here like this, she knew that she would be able to recharge and that she would feel better by the time she went in later.

Laying back on the grass, Elain stared up at the sky listening to the sounds of the garden and, in the distance, Lucien’s steady heartbeat. She was fairly sure that he was still asleep, and she hoped that when he awoke, he would be completely healed. She also hoped that she never saw anything has horrible as what she had witnessed in the dining hall that morning again. She shuddered as she remembered the sickening sound she’d heard when Tamlin had thrown Lucien into that wall. It was unlikely she would ever forget that and, she figured now, that had probably been what had broken his ribs.

She still didn’t know what had made her fling herself in front of Lucien. She hadn’t wanted him to be hurt, she knew that. Tamlin had been about to tear him open, she had seen that, and she remembered the fear that had speared through her. The thought of Lucien being killed had pushed her into action, but Elain was still unable to tell if the fear had been her own, or created by the bond. That was where she was caught up, she wanted to know if it was manipulating her or not. It was dangerous if it was. He was right, she could have been killed. The thought did nothing to change her mind, and she knew that she would do it again. 

Footsteps caught her attention, and she sat up quickly. She knew that Lucien was still up in his room, so she was halfway to her feet before she saw Tamlin striding toward her. Having nowhere to go, Elain straightened her dress and turned to face him, trying to look less afraid than she felt. He came straight toward her, stopping a few feet away as he looked at her. Elain fisted a handful of her dress nervously, not knowing what to say to him. 

“…Are you okay?” he asked, his green eyes looking over her. 

“Yes.” Elain watched as relief filled his features and he nodded, his eyes coming back to her face. 

“I am sorry.” He told her, “I… did not intend to hurt you.”

“Lucien healed me.”

Tamlin nodded again, looking away for a moment, “Good… that’s good…” Elain just watched him, wondering if he had come to find her specifically. “Is… Lucien okay?”

For a moment, Elain debated telling him that Lucien was just fine, or would be when he was done healing. She didn’t like the idea of just dismissing what Tamlin had done, however, especially considering the fact that Lucien had said he had done it before. “He’s still healing.” Regret crossed the High Lord’s face again. Good.

Elain remined silent, just looking at Tamlin who was clearly struggling to come up with something else to say to her. “Would… you walk with me?” he asked after a moment, “I have given some thought to your request for your book…”

“Yes.” She replied, dusting her dress off and hoping that he wasn’t going to lead her too far away from the house, still not overly comfortable with being alone with him. “Thank you.”

When Tamlin gestured ahead of them, Elain fell into step beside him. They walked silently for several minutes and she couldn’t help watching him out of the corner of her eye. This was the male that Feyre had fallen in love with when she had first come to Prythian. This was who she had risked her life for. He had provided for their family when she had gone…

Softening slightly, Elain looked around. “Your garden is the most magnificent I have seen…”

“I wish I could take credit for that.” His response was soft. “It is simply the way of things here.” Elain nodded and continued following where he led. “I thought you might like to include these…” 

She came to a stop beside him as he bent over a small bush on the edge of the garden bed. “Oh…” Elain looked closer at the lovely blush coloured flower shaped like an elegant star. “I’ve never seen this kind before…”

“No,” Tamlin agreed, “They only grow in the Spring Court.”

Pulling the small book Lucien had given her from her pocket, she began trying to sketch the flower. “Do they have any special significance?”

“Not in any particular way or use, that I am aware of.” Tamlin told her, “But they are a feature in much of the decoration of the estate… There are several rooms in which they feature quite prominently.”

“Whoever decorated must have appreciated them…” She murmured, eyes still on her work.

“Likely so.”

When Elain had written down what he had told her, she looked up at him. “I didn’t bring anything else I would need to properly capture the colours… so I’ll have to return later for that. Did you have any others that you would like included for the Spring Court?”

“Our most commonly recognised…” he took her further into the garden. “These grow everywhere around the court, but this is the most impressive in the garden.”

She was indeed impressed. Standing before the large bush, Elain took in the deep red roses with what came close to awe. Dropping to her knees to get a better look at one of the flowers, she tried her best to capture the shape in her drawing. Upon finishing, she got to her feet again, dusting herself off, and when she turned to look for Tamlin it was to see him staring at her thoughtfully. 

“You are nothing like your sister…”

“Oh,” she closed her book, “I’m no artist, I know…”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“Then what did you mean?” She met his green stare evenly. 

“You’re…” he paused, clearly searching for the word he wanted. “… nicer.”

Elain almost laughed. “Because Feyre would have probably punched you for what you did this morning to Lucien?”

“Yes.”

Elain frowned. “I see.”

“You are as she said.” He continued, “When she spoke of you… and Nesta.”

“What did she say?”

“That you have a gentle heart.” His eyes moved over her, “I’m glad that you were … unchanged… by what happened to you.”

“I wouldn’t say I was unchanged.”

“I mean in nature…”

Elain looked away. “Ah.”

“I am truly sorry.” Tamlin told her, “For what happened to you. I did not know what Ianthe…” he fell silent for a moment. 

“I remember you trying to stop it.” She eventually said, looking back to him. “When they were trying to put me in it… You and Lucien both tried to stop it.”

He gave a brief nod. “I regret that I could not.”

Watching him, Elain believed him. She could see that he truly did regret what had been done to her, and any part he may have played in it, knowingly or otherwise. She could also see the deep sadness within him, and the struggle to contain himself. There was a severe lack of confidence in his abilities as a leader, and hurt for what had happened to his court. There was something else, too, that glimmered at the edge of her vision. Not knowing where the words came from, Elain began to speak. 

“This will all change.” She told him, “Not today or tomorrow, but it will change. And you will change with it.” Tamlin gave her a confused look and she smiled at him. “You will be happy, one day.” She said, “You will have peace.” His look turned to one of longing, and she smiled again. It was then that Lucien’s heartbeat changed, and Elain turned toward the house. 

“Do you wish to return?” Tamlin asked her, and Elain nodded. 

“I think I should.”


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Chapter 16**

Lucien was on his feet the instant he heard Elain outside his door. She knocked and he strode to open the door and let her into his room. Every single time she had been in here had sent tingles of pleasure through him, and that driving primal force within him that always demanded he touch her when she was in reach began howling at him to get his hands on her, pull her close, tug her down into his bed…

“You look much better.” She said, those gorgeous brown eyes moving over him and Lucien lifted a hand to run though his hair.

“Mmm.” He nodded, “Got everything all fixed up.” Her smile had him taking several steps toward her, and he was surprised when she moved to meet him, throwing her arms around his neck. Lucien slid his own arms around her waist, lifting her to himself as he hugged her. “Thank you.” He murmured, “For what you did.” He felt her nod against him, “You are incredibly brave. I’ve never met anyone who would willingly throw themselves in front of Tamlin when he’s half transformed and in a rage like that.”

“I’m sure you have.”

“Nope.” He replied, “And certainly not for me.” Forcing himself to put Elain down and let her go, he stepped back and smiled at her. “I’d like to take you somewhere…” he told her, “As thanks for what you did…”

“And Tamlin?”

Lucien tilted his head. “I saw you talking to him out in the garden…” he gestured at his window. 

“Yes. He showed me some flowers he thought I might include in the book.”

Lucien looked her over again, searching for any sign of mistreatment. “Was he… well behaved?”

“He was fine.”

“Okay. Well, after this morning, I think Tam can wait until tomorrow for any further attempts at conversation…” Lucien frowned. “I’d prefer to spend the afternoon with you. Unless you have previous plans…?”

“No, I’m free…” Elain smiled shyly at him and he grinned. 

Not an hour later, Lucien had Elain walking along one of his well-known paths. He had loved this part of the Court back when he’d had the time to roam freely, and he knew that she would love where he was taking her. He was still in disbelief that she had thrown herself in front of him the way she had. He was certain that he would be dead if she hadn’t. He had not been able to get up, and Tamlin would not have stopped himself before ripping him apart. He’d meant it when he’d told Elain that nobody had ever done anything like that for him before, and he could not stop thinking about it now. Had she known what she was doing, or had she acted without thought? She had told him that it had been instinct, but what had sparked that instinct? Was it simply the bond forcing her to protect her mate, or was it more?

“Where is it that we are going?” Elain asked, turning to look at him as she moved ahead.

“It’s a surprise, Petal.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, but her pretty lips turned up at the corners in a supressed smile, and Lucien was pretty sure his heart did a flip. Lengthening his stride to reach her, he indicated a spot in the path ahead that forked left and directed her down it. She was bouncing along beside him, clearly enjoying her surroundings, and it wasn’t long before the path disappeared altogether and they stepped into a small glade.

*

Elain’s jaw dropped and she faltered in her step, thankful for Lucien’s hand when he slipped it beneath her elbow to keep her on her feet. Pausing to look around, she drew a slow breath. Light filtered through the trees above to create dappled patterns on the ferns underfoot, and thick luscious vines with stunning violet coloured flowers wound their way up nearly every tree trunk Elain could see. Wildflowers grew in nearly every colour imaginable, and a sweet floral scent floated on the air. 

“Oh, Lucien…” she breathed, trying not to blink as she looked around, wanting to take everything in.

“Do you like it?” he asked, and she could hear the satisfied smirk in his voice.

“It’s wonderful.”

She moved forward, a hand reaching out to trail through the violet flowers growing up a nearby tree. This place was enchanting, and held a strange sort of familiarity. She had dreamed about places like this her whole life, and had only ever imagined being able to replicate something like this in her own gardens. Until they had come to the Spring Court, however, Elain had not really thought it was possible for it to exist in reality. “What does that look on your face mean?” Lucien asked, and Elain turned to him. He was watching her with an intensity she could practically feel. His russet eye was bright, and his metallic eye clicked as he focused on her, neither eye leaving her for a moment.

“I…” Elain looked back at him, noting how his ruby hair seemed to shimmer in the dappled light. “I… think I used to dream about this place…”

Lucien tilted his head, his eyes remaining on her face. “Really?”

“Yes…” Elain nodded, gesturing around them, “I always wanted to recreate it… but… nothing ever came close.” She turned away to look around the glade, “I thought I had imagined it.” She heard Lucien approach her from behind. “Oh…” She knew without doubt that she was meant to have come here, that her entire life had been leading up to being in this glade.

“I used to love coming here.” Lucien told her, his voice low. “When I used to have the time to roam around or I just needed some space…” His heart began to beat more quickly, and Elain smiled, “It used to be one of my favourite places. It always felt like a kind of promise of something to come…” Elain turned to look up at him, not at all surprised to find him so close. Her hand came to rest lightly on his sleeve as her own heart began to race at his next words, “I think it was an indicator that I was yet to meet you…”

“Is that possible?” she breathed. 

Lucien’s metallic eye whirred as his gaze flickered back and forth across her face. “I don’t know.” One of his large hands trailed up Elain’s arm and she couldn’t resist a shudder, “But… you’re a seer… and you’ve been dreaming of this place? It doesn’t sound too far-fetched.”

“You were meant to bring me here…” She gazed up at him.

“Was I?” 

Leaning into him a little, Elain nodded, listening as his heartbeat thundered in her head. She could feel him struggling with himself, wanting to pull her tightly to himself, run his hands over her, hold her closer. She saw him swallow with effort and his hand dropped from her arm. Before he could move away, however, Elain took hold of his shirt, stepping closer again as she held his gaze. Lucien’s sharp, surprised, breath made her smile. “What are you doing, Petal?” he murmured.

“Why do you think we were meant to come here?”

His eyes didn’t leave hers, and Elain thought she could practically see his mind working to come up with a response. “I don’t know.” He eventually said softly, and she could feel his hands ghosting over her, barely touching. She shuddered again, tightening her hold on his shirt. “Elain…” he murmured, restraint and regret reaching her through the bond. “I’m trying very hard right now to…”

“I know.” Her own heartbeat had just about matched itself to his, and Elain was almost dizzy with the sensations.

“Are you deliberately teasing me?” he asked, his voice now barely more than a growl.

Leaning into his chest, Elain gazed up at him, meeting the searing look in his eyes. Realising in that moment that she wanted him to kiss her, she shook her head. The look in his eyes sharpened and that golden eye clicked and whirred, and Elain felt the moment his control slipped.

Strong arms snaked around her, tightening and pulling her hard against himself as he bent to her. With a gasp, Elain’s own hand slid from his chest up to his shoulder before his lips met hers. 

Lucien kissed her slowly. His hands were gentle on her waist, holding and stroking as his lips moved against hers and Elain let out a soft sigh, opening to him and his tentative, deliberate, teasing licks. When one of his hands lifted to her cheek, Elain melted, glad that his other arm was still around her waist, and that she was leaning against him. Her own hand tightened on his shoulder when he gave a small growl before he pulled back slightly. Elain’s eyes opened slowly to see him looking carefully at her, hunger clear on his face. Lucien met her gaze before pressing another soft kiss to her lips and then releasing her.

Letting a shaky breath out, Elain blinked, trying to steady herself. She could feel the heat in her cheeks and knew that she was probably scarlet. Swallowing, she lifted her fingers to her own cheek as she dropped her gaze. Graysen had never kissed her like that. He had always just kind of groped at her while somehow trying to simultaneously devour her. She had always thought that had been because he had been overcome by how much he desired her, but she could feel exactly how much Lucien desired her and that kiss had felt like fire.

Fire was still in his gaze when she lifted her eyes to his once more, and then she felt him leash it. She just stared at him, not knowing what to do or say. After a moment he looked away, cleared his throat, and straightened his shirt before running a hand through his hair. Elain just watched him, more and more sure by the second that she had figured out exactly why they had both been drawn to this place.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Chapter 17**

Neither of them spoke much on the walk back to the house. Lucien watched Elain out of the corner of his eye, wishing that he had a way of being able to listen to what she was thinking. She looked preoccupied, and he wondered if she was thinking about what had happened in the glade. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. Just the memory of Elain’s soft lips parting for him set his blood on fire, and Lucien tried to force his mind elsewhere when Elain glanced at him as if she knew what he had been thinking.

He wished she would say something. He wished he knew how she felt about it. Did this mean that she was closer to accepting the bond? Or, had she just given in to the force pulling them together? He didn’t have any answers, but he had so many questions. Looking at her again, he realised that she was probably going over the same questions in her own mind.

What did she think about it? Had she enjoyed it? He certainly had, and he had thought at the time that she had as well. He had noticed the way that she had leaned into him, melting against him when he had licked at her, caressing her with his hands as he did so. If he could get that kind of reaction out of her with just a kiss, Lucien wondered what other kinds of reactions he could get when he was really trying. He felt his blood quicken at the thought and when Elain glanced at him again, he remembered that she could hear his heartbeat. He watched as she blushed, clearly having guessed at what he was thinking about. 

“What… ah, what will you do for the rest of the afternoon?” he asked, “There is still some time before dinner.”

“Probably work at getting the colouring right for some of the flowers in the garden.” She replied, and Lucien resisted the disappointment that rose in him. She had worked out a plan that didn’t require his company.

“Oh, good idea.”

“…and you?” she asked?

He gave what he hoped looked like a nonchalant shrug. “Might go over some of the things Rhys wants to know so I’m prepared tomorrow when trying to drag information out of Tamlin.”

Elain bit her lip, and Lucien couldn’t look away from it. “Do you think he will listen this time?”

“It’s possible.” He replied. “He wants to do the right thing…”

“I think so, too.” She said. Lucien nodded and they remained silent until they reached the house. He watched Elain go upstairs in search of what she would need to take out to the garden before he turned and went in search of something to eat.

Lucien hadn’t expected to find Tamlin still in the house at this time of day, and he froze the second the blond came into view. Tamlin’s green eyes followed him into the room and Lucien just watched him return. 

“I… am glad you’re healed.”

“Thanks. Did it myself.” Lucien replied sardonically, raising an eyebrow.

“I did not intend…”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Elain, too…” Tamlin’s voice softened and Lucien stared at him. “I… tried to stop…”

The image of Elain’s blood dropping down her chest and arm flashed into Lucien’s mind and anger surged throughout him. “You do that again and it’ll be me who kills you…”

Tamlin just nodded, accepting his words. Lucien, noting that the older male was in one of his better moods, moved closer and slid into his old chair at the table. Tamlin leaned back in his own chair, looking at him again, and Lucien tried his best to appear at ease. “Elain,” he began, “told me that you showed her some flowers to include in the Spring Court chapter of her book.”

“That was what was expected of me, was it not?”

“Yes…” Lucien conceded, “And tomorrow, will you actually sit down with me to discuss what has been happening the last few months…?”

“Okay.”

“If you need help,” Lucien said softly, “ You only need to-”

“I don’t need help!” Tamlin’s voice held the edge of a snarl and Lucien bit back his next reply. “I have everything under control.” Nodding, Lucien let that go. He would revisit it tomorrow when he began putting together his report. Reaching into the centre of the table, he picked up a piece of fruit and took a bite and, after several moments, Tamlin spoke again. “I am sorry…” he said hesitantly, “for all the things you said earlier…”

Lucien looked at him and Tamlin kept his eyes on the table. “For everything?” he asked. “That sure is a lot…”

“Yes.” Tamlin agreed. “I offered you family, but didn’t treat you that way.” Lucien swallowed thickly, and Tamlin let out a huff. “I should not have sent you to Ianthe…” Glancing toward the door, Lucien listened intently, hoping that Elain was nowhere within earshot. She did not need to know about that night. She never needed to know about what had gone on in that cave; what he had done with the priestess, or what he had let her do to him.

When he didn’t hear Elain out in the hallway, Lucien closed his eyes in relief. “I appreciate that.”

“She doesn’t know, does she?”

Glancing at Tamlin, Lucien shook his head. “And she isn’t going to.” He frowned at the blonde who raised an eyebrow at him. 

“You don’t think she’ll find out?”

“Why would she?” Lucien asked, his tone low. “Unless someone tells her…”

“If that’s what you think.”

Lucien bared his teeth, “I… can’t have her look at me…” he shook his head, “If she knew what…” unable to suppress a shudder, Lucien forced his face back into a neutral expression. “You know how it is when all that power comes to you during the Rite. That is not the image of me that Elain needs. That is not who or what I am.”

Tamlin’s green eyes were steady on Lucien’s face. “I won’t tell her.”

Nodding, Lucien dropped his gaze. “Thank you.”


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Chapter 18**

_  
When Elain’s arms wrapped around his neck, Lucien dipped his head to press his lips to hers. His blood began to pound in his ears when she pressed herself to his chest, tightening her hold on him as her lips parted to allow him to deepen the kiss. Surging forward, Lucien did so, lifting Elain from her feet and carrying her the three steps to the edge of his bed. He hadn’t been sure what her reaction would be then, but he was still surprised when she lifted her feet to stand on the bed, making her taller than him and able to look down at him for once. She grinned, taking a step back, her eyes beckoning him forward._

_“Where are you going, Petal?”_

_“Come and find out…”_

_He was on the bed in the blink of an eye, his hand catching her by the wrist and pulling her to himself again as he sank down to the mattress. Elain folded herself easily into his lap and he claimed her lips in a searing kiss once more. He liked the fact that she was panting within moments, her hands tugging at his shirt until she could pull it up and over his head and then his own hands were making quick work of the fastenings of her dress._

_When the dress had joined his shirt on the floor, Lucien pressed Elain back against the mass of burnt orange and crimson cushions piled at the head of his bed. He had his pants off an instant later and then she had grabbed a handful of his hair, pulling him down on top of her. “Know what you want, love?” he murmured. Her response was to wrap her legs around his waist, loosening her hold on his hair._

_“Eternally you…” she breathed, bringing her lips to his ear, “Mate.”_

_That word in his ear obliterated any desire in Lucien to take this slowly and gently. He growled, licking his way up her throat as he hands slid down to her hips, yanking her into a better position beneath himself. Elain’s fingernails raked down his back and he bared his teeth. Knowing that she liked to tease him in order to draw a response, he decided that he was going to give her exactly what she wanted. Slipping a hand down to catch behind one of her knees, Lucien pulled her leg up to hook over his elbow as he pushed himself deep inside of her with a single fluid thrust. He lifted his head to watch her face, wanting to see the blissful expression she always made when he first entered her every time._

_Grinning in satisfaction, Lucien returned his lips to her throat, his teeth grazing her skin as he felt her hands clutch at his shoulders when he began to move. “This what you wanted?” his voice was guttural when he uttered the words against her ear and she nodded wordlessly, her nails pricking his skin. He hoisted her leg slightly higher, lengthening his thrusts in an attempt to draw the sounds he so dearly loved from her. Clutching more tightly at his shoulders, Elain whined softly._

_“Tell me,” he growled._

_“I…” she groaned, her hand moving back into his hair, and Lucien lifted his head again to look at her, meeting her wide brown eyes as he moved over her. “Lucien…”_

_Reaching above her, Lucien took a firm hold of the twisted wood that served as a headboard, using it to add further drive to his thrusting as he brought his lips back to hers, deepening the kiss as soon as she allowed it, and he knew that he would never, in all of eternity, grow tired of this.  
_

*

Elain lay on her back in the centre of her bed while the moonlight spilled into her room, more than one hundred percent sure that the dream she had just awoken from had not been her own. She was hot. So very hot. Throwing the covers back, she kicked them to the end of the bed in an attempt to cool down, tugging her nightdress up her legs as she did so, trying to get as much fresh air to her skin as she was able. 

Was that what Lucien had just been dreaming about? It had been so strange, seeing that entire scene from his point of view. It wasn’t hard, however, to flip it in her mind, to feel herself wanting him. Elain’s eyes closed, all too easily able to imagine how it would feel to wrap herself around him. She bit her lip at the thought of holding his powerful body between her thighs, her hands combing through that vibrant red hair while his lips moved down her throat, her chest… 

Trailing her hand up her own thigh, Elain thought about the way Lucien had kissed her that afternoon in the glade. That kiss had been gentle, yet heated. He hadn’t demanded anything from her, yet everything in her had screamed at her to submit to the passion and burn that had emanated from him. The heat of him had sparked something inside of herself, and Elain suspected that if Lucien hadn’t have been the one to pull away, she probably would not have. When her hand slipped between her legs, Elain gave a soft groan, finding herself already slick with desire. Opening her eyes then, to watch the moonlight dance across the pretty walls of her room, Elain threw one arm out to grasp at the sheet beneath her, while the other hand began to carefully rub herself in tiny circles.

“Ah…” Elain let her mind go over what had happened in the dream as her hand moved between her legs. It was especially satisfying, she thought, because it was already about her, not some random character in one of the novels she borrowed from Nesta. Also, she could enjoy the fantasy of it without having to be the architect. That was new, and she rather enjoyed it. Just the thought of the way Lucien had reached over her to get a good grip of the headboard as he had moved inside of her in the dream made Elain’s pulse quicken.

Why was she thinking this way? Was it because of what had happened this afternoon? Was it the dream that had gotten her so worked up? A combination of both? Or, she wondered, was it simply the bond trying to make her get up and walk across the hall to Lucien’s room? Realising that more than a small part of her wanted to do exactly that, Elain tried to distract herself. Moving her hand more quickly, she allowed her eyes to close. 

In that dream she had called him her ‘mate’. That word had seemed to be the catalyst for Lucien, sparking a more unrestrained desire than he had previously shown. Biting her lip, Elain wondered if that was how he would be in reality if she accepted the bond, accepted him as her mate. She had liked it, she had to admit it to herself. She had liked seeing him to confident and assertive and not bowing or acquiescing to anyone. The thought of his hands on her hips, yanking her down beneath himself, brought a soft groan from Elain as she carefully pushed a finger into herself. Her head tilted back as she began moving her hand more rhythmically.

Before long, Elain’s ragged breathing was the only thing she could hear, with Lucien’s heartbeat somewhere behind it slightly more elevated than usual. She figured he had awoken from the dream at the same time she had and was likely thinking along the same lines she was. Realising that she was moving her fingers inside of herself in sync with his heartbeat, Elain bit her lower lip, murmuring a prayer to the darkness that he wasn’t able to somehow feel what she was doing.

Lifting one of her knees higher, Elain pointed her foot as she let out a small cry as Lucien’s heartbeat grew quicker and quicker and she tried to keep up. She could feel her pleasure building and her breath caught in her throat as she tried to chase it. When a similar feeling slid toward her down the bond, she let out a small gasp, realising that Lucien’s increased heartrate combined with that sensation coming her way likely meant that he was touching himself just like she was.

It was the thought of him lying in his bed like she was, with those gentle hands on himself that sent Elain over her edge. She clenched her teeth, forcing herself to bite back the loud cry she wanted to release, as she let that hot wave of pleasure wash through her, over her. She had just drawn breath as it subsided, pulling her fingers from herself, when another wave hit her, this one down the bond, and she couldn’t bite back the cry that it produced. Instead, Elain clamped a hand over her mouth, hoping that nobody had heard her, and wondering if Lucien realised that he’d sent it to her at all.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Chapter 19**

As the sun set the next day, Elain slowly packed up her supplies out in the garden. She had successfully put together about a dozen images of various flowers from around the Spring Court gardens and had collected a handful of information on each. It would be a good amount for what she wanted from each court, and she felt a solid sense of accomplishment. She had also managed to successfully avoid Lucien all day, not sure she would be able to face him after last night. What if he had felt her though the bond as she had felt him? What if he knew what she had done after she had awoken from that dream? So what if it was the same thing he had done? It had been his dream, and that was entirely different. 

If he had felt her, if he knew, Elain didn’t know how she would respond to him. So, she had eaten breakfast quickly, and then headed out into the garden to work on her illustrations. She knew that he was going to sit down with Tamlin to do what Rhys had sent him here to do, so that had given them both something to keep them occupied during the day, and she had not seen him since. Now, the sun was setting and she wouldn’t be able to do anything further outside. She had to go back in.

Having put her things up in her room, and having bathed quickly, Elain made her way down to the dining room, knowing that she would find both Lucien and Tamlin there as dinner was about to be served. Upon entering the room, Elain discovered that Lucien sat alone at the table. Her step faltered as she approached the table, and he gave her a broad smile. “You’ve been busy today,” he said, “I saw you out in the garden working away…”

“Yeah,” Elain tried not to picture running her hands through that hair as she sank into her seat. “How did it go with Tamlin?”

“Better than expected.”

“Where is he?”

“Changing upstairs, I suppose.”

Lucien’s heartbeat quickened and Elain glanced up to find him looking at her. He knew something was going on, she could feel it. He was watching her too closely, those eyes moving over her as if assessing, but then she wondered if he was simply recalling his dream from the previous night. As soon as she had the thought, images of it came back to her. She could see herself wrapped around him, her hands clutching at his back, his broad shoulders, as he moved over her. Swallowing thickly, Elain reached for the water on the table, willing herself to keep her face neutral, not to let her thoughts show.

*

Leaning back in his chair, Lucien watched Elain. She wasn’t looking at him, and was clearly doing it deliberately. He tried again to engage her, “Did you accomplish what you wanted outside?”

“Yes, I think so.” Again, she glanced quickly at him, but then looked away. Why?

For a second, Lucien wondered if someone had told her about Ianthe. Hurt washed through him, before he forced it down. Tamlin had said he wouldn’t tell her, and Lucien believed he would stick to his word. It was unlikely anyone else would have thought to tell her, either. Watching her, he tried to work out what was wrong. What had he done? They hadn’t really spoken much after returning from the glade yesterday, and he wondered again if he shouldn’t have kissed her. He didn’t want to believe that. Everything about that kiss had felt so unbelievably and irrevocably right. He’d felt it in his bones, and he had hoped that she had too. Maybe she hadn’t. Maybe she had not been as affected by it as he had been. 

Lucien bit the inside of his cheek, thinking about how affected he had been by it. He had no doubt that the kiss had been what had sparked that dream he’d had last night. His eyes went back to Elain, roving over her as he thought about the way she had responded to his kiss in that dream. She had wanted him so completely, she had called him ‘mate’. Something within him began to howl with desire and Lucien clenched his hands, trying to keep it leashed. When he noticed Elain glance at him before looking back to her cup he tilted his head. There was a light blush staining her cheeks and he wondered what she was thinking about. Reaching for the bond, he tried to glean anything he could. She looked at him, clearly startled, and clearly having felt him trying to read her. Lucien gave her one of his best courtly smiles and she blushed darker.

Had she somehow read him when he’d tried to read her? Lucien’s eyes widened. Had she seen the dream? Instantly, he knew that she had. She had seen it last night, and she had been avoiding him all day because of it. Panicking slightly, Lucien tried to work out what to say. Running a hand over his face, he glanced again at her. “Elain…?”

“Mhm?” She was fiddling with the cutlery on the table before her.

“…did… you… see…?”

“Yes.” She finally met his eyes for longer than a second, the colour high on her cheeks now. Pausing, Lucien tried to work out what exactly she had seen. If he had somehow sent the dream to her down the bond while asleep, then it should have stopped when he’d awoken. There was no reason to assume that she had seen what he had done afterwards, when he had awoken harder than he had ever been, and had decided to take matters into his own hands. With the images from his dream fresh in his mind, it hadn’t taken him long to stroke himself to relief, Elain’s name on his lips when he’d climaxed. 

“…what… did you see?” he asked softly, sure he was probably blushing now himself. 

“Just the dream.” Elain replied quickly. Too quickly. Lucien’s metallic eye clicked as he focused on her face. She was still looking at him, which he supposed was promising. 

“Just the dream…” he repeated and she nodded, her eyes moved over his own face before flicking away and Lucien remembered that she could hear his heartbeat. She didn’t need to have seen what he had done after he had awoken, because she would have heard his heart. He thought about the way his blood had pounded in his ears, and knew that she definitely would have noticed that thundering noise. She most certainly knew what he had done. 

A moment later, Lucien remembered the sounds he had heard from her room. He had thought at the time that she must have had an unpleasant dream, he’d supposed something to do with Hybern, and he had not gone to check because he hadn’t wanted her to know what he had just been doing. He had listened for a while, intending to cross the hall if he heard anything further, but he had not and he had assumed that she was fine and was asleep. Now, he suspected that those sounds had not been because of a bad dream. As they stared at one another, Lucien tried again to reach her mind. She had known what he’d been doing, and now he was pretty certain that she had done the same. Something deep within him was rejoicing that she had been so affected by that dream, and he gave her a lazy smirk. The moment she realised that he had figured it out was evident on her face and she picked up her cup again, going to take a small sip, but then realised that it was empty and she put it down again quickly. 

“Well, Petal…” he murmured, “Isn’t that interesting…”

Elain gave a small whine and stared at the table. Lucien chuckled softly and then looked toward the door when Tamlin walked in.

*

Elain wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole. He had figured it out. He knew. Perhaps he had heard her after all. She was almost thankful when Tamlin arrived, because Lucien stopped grinning at her and looked toward the High Lord. 

She tried to listen to their conversation, but focused mainly on keeping her breath slow and even and willing the rush of blood to leave her face because Tamlin kept giving her questioning looks and Lucien kept smiling at her. Eventually, something Tamlin said caught her attention. 

“You received a message today?”

“Yes.” Lucien replied softly. “Rhys said that Eris has sent him word. They are ready for us to go the Autumn Court…”

“Are you done here?” Tamlin asked, and Elain noted his green eyes remained fixed upon Lucien. 

“Well, I have everything I needed…” Lucien turned his eyes on Elain, “But we had more than one job. Have you got what you were after, Petal?”

Elain nodded, watching as he nodded slowly, his face that careful neutral mask he sometimes wore. Tamlin was still looking at him and Elain realised that the blond cared. Tamlin could clearly tell that Lucien was less than eager to go to the Autumn Court and was evidently watching for his reaction. She hoped that Lucien had noticed the same thing. “…when will we go?” Elain asked after a moment. Both of Lucien’s eyes fixed on her again, his russet eye dark with a mixture of emotions she couldn’t began to identify. 

“Tomorrow, I suppose.”


	20. Chapter Twenty

**Chapter 20**

Barely having slept during the night, Lucien staggered down the stairs with his pack over his shoulder and a sick feeling gnawing at his insides. He had always felt nervous returning to the Autumn Court for any reason over the years since he had left, but it was so much more intense right now. He knew why. He knew that it was because he was taking Elain back with him. He was delivering his mate right into the hands of the people who had murdered his first love. He didn’t want to do it, but he knew that he didn’t have a choice. Elain wanted to go, and Rhys was right in reminding him that they were protected. But still. But, still. 

Tamlin was waiting by the front door, and Lucien stepped out into the morning sun to stand beside him. They stood in silence for a few moments before Elain appeared and Lucien didn’t miss the apprehensive look she gave him. “Did you get _any_ sleep?” she asked.

“Got a couple of seconds here and there.” He replied, grinning at her, but she just frowned.

“Will you go through the cave?” Tamlin asked, his arms folded across his chest. Lucien dragged his gaze from Elain’s face to look at the High Lord. 

“I think that’s best.” he said, giving a brief nod. Tamlin nodded his agreement, and Lucien could see his worry as those green eyes looked between himself and Elain. Perhaps they might be friends again in future. The thought made him smile a little. 

“…are you sure you want to go?” Tamlin sounded hesitant and Lucien tilted his head.

“Not in the slightest, but we will…”

“You…” Green eyes shifted toward Elain, “You could stay here…” Lucien watched his old friend for a moment, easily able to discern the fact that the older male was thinking about what he had told him about Jesminda.

“I’m not leaving her here…” Lucien tried to keep the growl out of his voice, and wasn’t entirely sure that he had managed to do so. 

“I meant both of you.” Tamlin said crisply, meeting his eyes. “You don’t have to go back there.”

“I…” Lucien glanced at Elain and then back to Tamlin, “I appreciate that…”

“…Be careful, then.” Tamlin looked at Elain as well and Lucien nodded.

“Thanks, Tam…” Lucien murmured, “Look, I… I’m sorry for what I said about Feyre not being your mate.” Tamlin stood rigid, his green eyes snapping back to Lucien. “But… that just means that someone else is…”

“Not everyone gets one.” Tamlin’s response was low, but the pain in his voice was evident.

Shaking his head, Lucien met his eyes. “It’s to produce powerful offspring,” he said gently, “You have one.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Elain nodding her agreement. Tamlin just looked from one of them to the other before letting out a deep breath. 

“I would appreciate knowing how things are in the Autumn Court, if you would let me know.”

Nodding, Lucien shifted his pack on his shoulder. “Of course.”

Elain began taking the steps down to the garden slowly. “Thank you.” She said, her eyes sliding to Tamlin before looking back to the garden. 

“You’re welcome any time, Lady.”

Lucien watched her walk through the garden toward the path before he looked back to Tamlin one last time. “Tam…”

“She likes it here.” 

“I know.” He paused. “I… will let you know how it goes.”

“Thank you.” Tamlin stepped back toward the door. “I meant it.” He said, fixing Lucien with a steady look. “Be careful.”

Lucien grew more and more uneasy and he and Elain slipped through the portal to the Autumn Court. He always forgot just how much cooler it was, and he smiled when Elain let out a surprised gasp, her hands lifting to rub at her arms. “Oh, wow…” she murmured as they stepped into the Autumn Forest.

Even though he had grown up among these trees, Lucien was never not mesmerised by the colours. Some deep part of him eased, while his stomach twisted in knots. This was home, and yet… it wasn’t.

“Does it always look like this?” Elain asked, her eyes moving toward him. Lucien nodded. 

“It does.”

“…wow.”

He watched Elain as they walked. She was looking around them with wonder at all the colours, and he could hardly take his eyes off of her. He was surprised that she appeared to suit this place. Her hair, her complexion, and even her eyes appeared to blend well with the Autumn colours. She looked as if she belonged, and he wished that they had the time to spend together out here. He wished that he could bring her here whenever he liked, to let her wander and explore the beauty. While that wasn’t an option, he just watched her. She looked thoroughly enchanted, and it pleased Lucien more than he had anticipated. 

He had been so caught up in watching Elain that he hadn’t noticed anyone else drawing nearer. That was, until several of his brothers stepped out onto the path ahead of them, grinning from ear to ear.

*

Elain jumped when Lucien’s hand closed around her wrist, pulling her to a stop as he pressed in front of her, trying to put himself between her and the three redheaded faeries who stood not far ahead of them. A glance around him at their faces was enough for Elain to recognise them from Lucien’s memory of Jesminda’s execution. His brothers.

“Lucien…” One of them sneered. “You do just keep coming back, don’t you?”

“Hasn’t learned his lesson, maybe.” Another said. 

“Maybe he needs to be taught again?” The first responded.

Lucien went rigid, and Elain stepped closer to him, willing him to ignore them. “Lucien…” she murmured, when she noticed that he wasn’t so much as breathing. Her voice seemed to stir him and he turned his head to look at her. 

“Come on then,” one of his brothers said, “Our Father has commanded us to escort you to him.”

Lucien remained between Elain and his brothers the entire rest of the way to The Forest House, and Elain could feel the apprehension coming off of him in waves. She had no idea how he was able to make himself appear so calm. Probably all that courtier training and his years as Tamlin’s emissary, she figured. 

As they walked up the path toward the house, Elain spied what appeared to be a courtyard off to the side, her eye catching on several colourful trees she would want to get a closer look at later. As they continued moving, Elain looked around with wonder. This place was absolutely stunning. The colours were beyond anything she could have hoped to imagine and, despite the fact that she could feel Lucien’s roiling emotions, everything else felt strangely muted. The very air seemed to tinkle with bells as leaves fell around them and Elain found it difficult to keep her eyes focused on one thing for very long. They paused while the heavy wrought gate was lifted and then Lucien’s brothers were marching them though into the house. 

Elain watched Lucien as they entered the house. She could feel the low level panic rolling down the bond from him and she made sure to stay close, knowing that that was all she could really do to prevent his panic building. Ignoring the looks she was receiving from the redheaded males surrounding them, Elain tried to keep her features as neutral and unaffected as Lucien’s. When his hand came to rest on her lower back, his panic slammed into her with more force and she looked up at him with wide eyes. “Stay close to me.” He said softly, and she just nodded.

When the largest of the brothers pushed open enormous wooden double doors, Elain’s breath caught in her throat. She instantly recognised the large hall beyond as the place that she had seen in Lucien’s memory. Walking forward with him, Elain’s eyes immediately came to rest on Beron, just as he had looked in that memory, sitting stiffly on a large chair atop the dais by the far wall. Lucien’s heartbeat doubled in pace and he went stiff beside her. 

“Closer…” Beron’s low voice commanded and they both took several steps toward the dais. “Closer…” he repeated. Elain followed Lucien’s lead, taking two more steps, until Beron held up a hand for them to stop. 

Disgust and horror reached Elain down the bond and, as she glanced at Lucien, she realised that his father had directed them to stand exactly where Jesminda had been kneeling when she had been killed. Pressing her lips together tightly, Elain prayed she wouldn’t throw up. She could hear Lucien’s screams in her head as he had tried desperately to get to the faerie he had been in love with, and she remembered that it had taken two of his brothers to hold him down. Unable to help her gaze going to him again, Elain noticed that he was shaking where he stood, his back straight and his eyes on his father. She reached almost instinctively for the bond then, but so many swirling emotions hit her that she wasn’t sure where to begin. Two stood out for her, and it was enough to get the general idea. Hate and fear.

“So,” Beron drawled, crossing one leg over the other on his throne, “you’ve come back again.”


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

**Chapter 21**

Lucien could not make himself stop shaking. He didn’t know what was even causing it. Was it the rage that was coursing through him, the loathing, or the fear that he had just made a terrible mistake by coming here? Was it simply a product of his struggle to suppress everything swirling around inside him as he tried to remain still, meeting his father’s cold gaze? It was probably all of it, he figured. Trying to steady himself, Lucien glanced around the room. His mother was sitting beside Beron in a chair of her own, far less ornate and grand than Beron’s but ceremonial nonetheless. When his eyes met hers, she gave him the tiniest of smiles, and his heart ached. An instant later he noticed Eris come to stand nearby, and Lucien tried to lock his expressions down again. His eldest brother was surveying the room with apparent boredom, and Lucien forced himself to look back to his father who was clearly eyeing his youngest son with distaste. When Beron’s brown eyes slid from him to Elain, Lucien bit back a snarl, his blood boiling in his veins.

Beron’s eyes returned to Lucien, apparently having noticed his reaction, and his father raised an eyebrow. Lucien pushed his shoulders back, meeting that look as best he could. Behind him, he felt his brothers approach, and he readied himself in case they came too much closer. He still couldn’t stop that shaking, however. When Elain shifted toward him, her hand sliding into his and holding firmly, his breath caught in surprise. A sneer worked its way onto Beron’s face and Lucien clenched his teeth.

“This is the Mate we’ve heard about is it?” the High Lord asked. 

“This is Elain Archeron.” Lucien tried to keep his voice easy, but he wasn’t sure how well he had managed that. “Sister to the High Lady of the Night Court. And, yes. My Mate.” He kept his firm grip on Elain’s hand, noticing that he had stopped shaking at last. 

“Cauldron-Made, isn’t it?” Beron asked, his eyes barely flicking in Elain’s direction before returning to Lucien. “Not even a true High Fae Female?” Lucien stiffened at his words, and another rush of anger flushed through him. “Clearly your taste in lovers has not improved over the years…”

Only Elain’s hand in his stopped Lucien from launching himself at Beron. Eris was running his hand over his face in irritation and Lucien forced himself to clench his teeth rather than respond to his father. Instead he just stared at him. His heart was thundering almost painfully in his chest, raging at the fact that Beron had forced him to stand beside Elain in the very spot that Jesminda had been executed, where he’d been forced to watch helplessly, unable to do anything about it. And now, he was being forced to stand helplessly and listen to him insult his Mate while he was unable to do anything about it either. Shifting his attention to his mother, he met her sad gaze.

Swallowing, Lucien looked back to Beron. “The High Lord of the Night Court requests that you update-”

“Yes,” Beron waved his hand, “Eris will deal with it.”

Lucien looked to his eldest brother who gave him a single nod. “Okay,” he looked back to Beron, “He also requests that Elain be given the freedom to move around the court of her own volition in order to gather what she needs for her book.”

“Yes…” Beron’s brown eyes went to Elain. Lucien felt her straighten beside him. “I wouldn’t have it said that the Autumn Court isn’t more beautiful than any of the others. This is an opportunity to prove it. You may roam as you please.”

“Thank you.” Elain said, giving a slight bob of her head. The contempt that crossed his father’s face sent a new hot wave of anger through Lucien and he squeezed Elain’s hand gently.

*

Every time Beron spoke, Elain heard Lucien’s heart react. She could feel the heat of suppressed anger burning out of him, and she thought it was actually rather impressive that he hadn’t exploded. She hadn’t cared at all about anything the High Lord had said about her, and she knew that every word of it had been directed at Lucien and designed to wound him. She doubted at all that Beron cared enough about her to even try to insult her directly. It had all been for Lucien’s benefit.

The only thing she had cared about was that she had been given the freedom to move around the court as she liked. She wanted to go and find that courtyard she had seen earlier, and get started on her search for the flowers she would include in her book. The sooner they completed what they had come for, the sooner they could leave. Getting Lucien out of here as quickly as possible seemed like a good idea to Elain. She glanced around the room. It was grand, but rather cold and foreboding. Just like Beron. When they noticed her looking their way, Lucien’s brothers smiled at her, their expressions nothing short of vulpine as their eyes moved over her. She tried not to shudder.

When the Lady of the Autumn Court got to her feet, Elain watched her carefully. “I was going to go for a walk. Elain, would you care to join me?” Lucien’s mother asked her, voice sweet and inviting. When Lucien slipped his hand out of her grip, Elain glanced around at him. His hand moved to her lower back again and he began pressing her in the direction of his mother. He wanted her to go, she realised, and nodded. 

“Yes, that would be lovely.” Elain said, turning back to the only faerie in the room smiling at her. Hesitantly, she took several steps toward Lucien’s mother, glancing back over her shoulder at him. He gave her an encouraging nod, before turning his attention back to his father on the dais. Elain allowed the Lady of the Autumn Court to link their arms together, and then let herself be led outside.

“I am quite pleased to meet you, Elain.”

“I am pleased to meet you as well, Lady.” Elain said gently. 

“You may call me Ashk.”

Elain glanced up at her and gave a small smile. “As you wish.”

The smile that Ashk gave her was warm, and Elain couldn’t look away from her for several moments. There was interest in the Lady’s russet eyes as she met Elain’s own gaze, and as Elain looked her over, she realised that Lucien had inherited the majority of his features from his beautiful mother. “You think he looks like me…?” Ashk appeared to have read Elain’s thoughts, and Elain felt herself blush. 

“Yes…”

“I have often thought the same.” There was clear pride in Ashk’s voice. “Not everything. His nose… is clearly his father’s.” Another smile at Elain, “But enough…” Elain nodded silently, turning her eyes on the garden they were passing through. “I asked you to come with me,” Ashk went on, “to ease Lucien’s mind. He no doubt would be worried that you were wandering around on your own…” Elain looked up at her again. 

“I think you’re likely right.”

Ashk bit her lip. “Yes. I imagine he thinks anything could happen to you.” Those russet eyes that Lucien had inherited flicked around them. “A legitimate concern, I’m afraid…” Elain tilted her head.

“Then I am glad you are with me.”

Ashk’s bright smile was back, and Elain was certain that she would have been devastatingly beautiful before whatever had happened to her to create that innate sense of sadness that seemed to settle over her. “I am truly pleased to meet you.” Ashk’s arm tightened around Elain’s, “I have always hoped that Lucien would find his Mate, and I have only ever dreamed that she would be kind-hearted and gentle… that is what he needs to heal…”

Elain didn’t know what to say to that. She nodded. Ashk stopped walking and Elain glanced up in confusion for a second to meet her eyes. 

“You haven’t accepted the bond yet, though…”

Feeling herself blush again, Elain shook her head. “No…”

“Why?” Ashk asked, and Elain was sure she heard a little defensiveness in the Lady’s tone. 

“I…” Elain swallowed thickly, “It happened the moment we looked each other in the eyes for the first time… we didn’t know one another… I… would like to know him better first.”

Ashk nodded and gave her a small smile. “Lucien is kind-hearted.” She told Elain softly, and Elain nodded. “He has been since he was a child. It made growing up here… difficult… for him.” Elain suspected she had some insight into Ashk’s own sadness. 

“I think I see where he got his kindness from.” Elain said gently, watching as a pleased look washed across the Lady’s beautiful face. Ashk took her arm again and they resumed their walk. 

“Don’t tell anyone that the bond has not been accepted.” Ashk’s words were so soft Elain barely heard them. “Not while you are here.” Elain nodded slowly.

“Okay.”

“And please don’t take anything my husband says to heart.”

“No, I… didn’t.”

“I didn’t think you did…” Ashk sounded thoughtful, “You barely looked at him.” Elain blinked. It was true. She had been watching Lucien most of the time, trying to gauge his reactions and wanting to be ready if he lost his control. “You were far more interested in my son…” Elain had lost count of how many times he had blushed during this conversation alone, “That’s good…” Ashk looked at her approvingly.

They had come around the garden and were heading for the doors inside again, and Elain began to wonder what had happened while she and Ashk had been gone. She hoped that nothing awful had taken place, and was relieved to see that nobody appeared injured as she came back through the doors. She felt Lucien’s relief the instant he saw her, and a rush of affection as his eyes slid to his mother. Ashk released Elain’s arm, and she strode back across the hall to resume her position by Lucien’s side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gave the Lady of the Autumn Court a name...  
> She deserves one.


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

**Chapter 22**

Lucien’s brothers were prowling around behind them as Elain resumed her spot beside Lucien. Beron was telling them where they would be staying. A room in the guest wing. Not, Elain supposed, Lucien’s old room. Also, she noted, a singular room. Glancing at Lucien out of the corner of her eye, she wondered if he would request another as he had from Tamlin. He did not.

Blinking rapidly, she looked toward the dais where Beron was still monologuing. The disdain she could see in his eyes as he looked at his youngest son was shocking to Elain. She had known that they hadn’t been on good terms, but there was absolutely no trace of affection in the High Lord’s countenance. Elain wondered if it had always been this way, or if things had soured after Jesminda. 

When Beron made a comment about Lucien’s ability to find the room on his own thanks to his fancy artificial eye, Elain heard a soft gasp from Ashk. “Oh, come now.” Beron said, turning toward his wife and reaching a hand out to pat her arm. “Who could say they were surprised? He never did learn to keep his mouth shut, no matter how many times we tried to teach him that lesson.” Those hard brown eyes went back to Lucien, “He never wanted to act like a High Lord’s son, did you Lucien? Always more interested in … the lesser element. Now you look like one.”

Elain felt Lucien shrink beside her and, seeking to comfort him, she reached a hand out, laying it gently on his arm. Instantly, her ears began to ring and her vision shifted.

_  
Lucien stood before the throne upon which Amarantha was lounging casually. Elain noticed again that he appeared younger and, she noted, still had both of his eyes. He also looked thoroughly pissed off._

_“And Tamlin couldn’t come himself?” The female sneered, leaning forward to stare at Lucien who shook his head._

_“I am his Emissary.”_

_“Yes, but I don’t give a shit about you.”_

_Lucien bit back a clear sigh. “Tamlin has given me the authority to speak for him in this matter. He wishes to discuss how he might keep peace despite his … ah…declination… of your offer.”_

_Amarantha’s face twisted. Elain watched with apprehension as the guards who had been by the door drifted closer, apparently sensing their mistress’ disapproval. Lucien was watching Amarantha for her response._

_“There will be no peace!” She snapped, getting to her feet and glaring at him. “There will be no peace as long as he keeps rejecting me!”_

_Temper flashed across Lucien’s face. “How can you be so selfish!” He retorted, “You would send us to war because Tamlin won’t fuck you? Do us all a favour and go back to the shit-hole that you crawled out of!”_

_Before Elain could so much as gasp, the guards had seized Lucien as Amarantha let out a scream of rage and flew at him, slapping him hard across the face. “How dare you speak to me like that?” She shrieked._

_Lucien appeared to have realised his error, and Elain could see real fear in his eyes as he was forced to his knees before Amarantha. “I…” whatever he had been about to say was cut off when one of the guards grabbed a handful of his vibrant ruby hair and yanked his head back, holding him in place._

_“You need to be taught a lesson.” Amarantha growled, standing over him. “Didn’t they teach you to watch your mouth in The Autumn Court? Surely your mother has better manners than that…”_

_Lucien struggled, but Elain could see that he wasn’t going to get out of the hold of those guards whose own eyes were firmly on the female before them. Amarantha lifted a hand and Elain took several hasty steps forward in horror when she saw that the faerie’s fingers now ended in sharp pointed nails that resembled claws, and that she knew exactly what the horrid female was about to do with them._

_“No…” Elain breathed, putting a hand out, but Amarantha moved right through her._

_“No!” Lucien’s panicked cry rang out through the chamber and Elain watched with horror as he tried again to get free. The guard with a hold of his hair yanked hard enough to bring tears to those russet eyes, but Lucien still didn’t stop trying to get away. “No, please…!”_

_Amarantha just laughed, the sound manic and Elain lifted a hand to cover her mouth, wanting to look away but somehow unable to. “Next time you’ll think twice about opening your mouth to disrespect me.” The cold seething anger slithered around the chamber as her words echoed and then, as quick as lightening, Amarantha had raked her nails down the left side of Lucien’s face and Elain was finally able to turn away as he screamed._

_She had expected the vision to stop, to have been released, but nothing had changed. She could still hear Lucien’s screaming, unending and unchecked. Amarantha’s laugh again echoed around them, and Elain looked back to see that the guards had dropped Lucien who was now leaning forward on one hand on the ground, the other clutched to his face. Blood was splattered across the stone floor around him, and a small pool was forming where he had fallen. Amarantha was still laughing and Elain flicked a glance her way, her breath catching in her throat in absolute horror when she saw the faerie laughing at something she held in her clawed and bloody hand. A single russet eye.  
_

*

When Elain went rigid and then swayed on her feet, Lucien slipped a hand under her arm. He knew she’d had another vision, he had felt it this time. He didn’t know what it had been, but judging from the green colour she had turned, he suspected that it hadn’t been pleasant. When he felt her tremble he moved closer, his other hand coming to her arm while the first wound around her waist. He needed to get her out. 

“Ah,” Lucien directed his attention to his father once more. “If we might retire for the afternoon,” he began, “Elain is exhausted from our journey here.”

Beron waved a hand of dismissal. “You are not required until dinner. It is at sunset, as I’m sure you well recall.”

Turning, Lucien swept Elain from the hall, not observing any of the usual formalities. He didn’t care. 

“Are you okay?” He asked her quietly as they strode through the hallways of the Forest House. Elain took a handful of his jacket as she walked quietly beside him, and Lucien surveyed her out of the corner of his eye as she held tightly. “I know you saw something.” He told her, “I felt it…” Elain’s only response was to tighten her hold on his jacket, leaning into him a little.

He took her quickly up to the guest wing and, as they walked down the final hallway approaching the room they’d been given, Elain began to cry. Tightening his arm around her waist, Lucien stepped quickly to the door to their room, and opened it. He was under no doubt that the bond had seen fit to show her another horrific event from his life, and he had no idea when it would stop. There were so many to choose from.

*

The second Lucien had closed the door to their room behind them, Elain turned and threw her arms around his neck.

“What did you see?” he asked, as his warm hands came to her waist and Elain sobbed into his collar. “Whatever it was, I’m sorry…”

“Amarantha,” she breathed, loosening her hold on him and sliding back down until her hands were pressed against his chest, “When she…” Elain lifted her gaze to his face, her eyes tracing the brutal scar from his brow to his jaw. “When she did that…” She was surprised when he flinched, turning his face away from her and dipping his head so that his hair fell across the scar, hiding it from view. “Don’t…” Elain reached out to him again, her hand closing around a handful of his jacket and pulling him back around to face her. “Don’t hide from me…”

Lucien met her eyes and she could see the wariness in him. She didn’t release her hold on his jacket, meeting his gaze steadily. After a moment he turned back to her, lifting a hand to push his hair back, revealing his scar and golden eye once more. “I’m sorry you saw that.” His words were soft and Elain tried to push away the image of Amarantha raking her clawed hand down his face.

“What your father said,” she murmured, shaking her head, “Don’t listen to him. It was untrue and it was only intended to put you off balance.”

“I know what he was trying to do.” Lucien replied gently, “That doesn’t make what he said untrue…” Elain had been about to repeat that it was untrue when he went on. “Makes sense that is what you saw. It seems to be showing you events directly related to what is happening around you.”

She had been thinking the same thing and nodded her agreement, her eyes moving over his face again. “I… can’t believe that she just…” She lifted a hand to him, her fingers lightly touching his jaw. Lucien just stared at her, not moving or speaking at all. “…like it was nothing…” She shuddered in horror, remembering the way Amarantha had stood laughing while Lucien knelt screaming on the stone floor.

“I’m sorry.” He murmured, bringing a warm hand to the back of Elain’s neck and drawing her in. She felt him press his lips to her forehead and she released his jacket at last. “I’m sorry… for it all.”

After a moment Elain looked up, realising that she could feel his self-doubt, and shame.. “Lucien,” she said, “You can’t let them get under your skin.”

“I know.” He replied, “But… It’s as if nothing has changed. He made us stand where…” Shaking his head, he looked away again and Elain lay a hand on his arm.

“I did notice that…”

“I don’t know what I ever did for him to hate me that much.” Lucien said, “But he always has… I was never good enough for him.”

“Do you remember when we were sitting under that tree in Rhys’ garden and I was wondering if I should include a drawing of one of the flowers that fell on us even though it wasn’t some fancy Night Court flower?” She waited for him to nod before continuing, “You told me that if I liked it, it was worthy…”

“Yes.” He murmured, eyes moving back and forth across her face. 

“I like you.” She said simply. 

Surprise flickered across Lucien’s face at the same time she felt it move through him and down the bond. He tilted his head a moment later and a grin worked its way onto his face. “Is that so, Petal?”

Elain nodded, trying not to blush though she could feel her cheeks heat as he looked at her. “Yes.” She said, pleased that she sounded more confident than she felt. “Despite the fact that you seem to think you’re nothing particularly special, I like you. Therefore, by your own logic, you are worthy of everything.”

He was looking at her strangely now, and Elain bit her lip as her gaze slid from him, unable to meet his eyes any longer. Her breath caught in her throat then when Lucien, without laying a hand on her or touching her in any other way, bent and pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. Smiling, she twisted her hands together, noting the pleasant warmth that spread throughout her and wondering what exactly that meant.


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Chapter 23**

Watching as Lucien barred the door, Elain raised an eyebrow. “So…” she began, trying to sound casual. “We… we’re going to share… the room…” She saw his back straighten before he turned to her, hesitation clear on his face.

“I… I thought to ask for separate rooms…” he said gently, “but… I think I would rest easier if I knew you were safe… here…” She watched as he bit his lip, a hand going up into his hair. “I know that Rhys thinks we’re protected, but I wouldn’t put it past my brothers to do whatever they liked, consequences be damned, because they certainly wouldn’t give a shit about breaking any tentative alliance with the Night Court or anyone else as long as they got to satisfy whatever urge they had whenever they wanted to.” His metallic eye clicked an whirred as he glanced around the room before focusing once again on Elain, “And if we asked to be put in separate rooms then they would know that… they would know that the bond hasn’t been… accepted… and…” his look became more intense as he met her gaze, “I don’t know what … ideas… that would inspire in them.”

“Your mother knows.” Elain said softly, “She told me not to tell anyone…”

Lucien nodded, taking a step toward her. “To hurt me, they wouldn’t hesitate to hurt you… I’m sorry.” Elain watched as he grew visibly frustrated, “I’m sorry that I put you at risk…”

“Lucien…”

“I’m sorry…” he carried on as if he hadn’t heard her, “It’s my fault. If you weren’t my… if I didn’t care for you, you’d not be of any interest to them…” a slight panicked tone had entered Lucien’s voice and Elain strode forward, taking his hands in hers and pulling him toward the large bed in the centre of the room, making him sit down. He did as she indicated, and Elain held both of his hands in hers as she sat beside him, looking at him earnestly. “If… if you want your own room…” Elain had to actually strain to hear him, “I can ask.”

Shaking her head, Elain kept her hold on his hands. “No.” she said gently, “This is fine.”

“I’ll sleep on the couch…” he inclined his head at a small orange couch by the far wall. “I’ll drag it in front of the door…”

Elain wanted to tell him that sleeping on the couch was unnecessary, but she didn’t know how she felt about sharing a bed with him. She knew that she trusted him to control any driving urges from the bond like he had that night in the kitchen, but she suspected that would be rather more difficult if they were in the same bed. She swallowed thickly when she remembered the dream he had accidentally sent to her. Clearly some part of him was already imagining what it would be like to have her in his bed, so perhaps it was better not to test him too harshly. 

When she looked up to his face once more, it was to find him staring across the room unseeingly. Anguish crept down the bond toward her, and she figured he was caught up in some unpleasant memory. “Lucien…” she began softly and his eyes flicked directly to her. “What are you thinking about?”

“Oh,” he shook his head dismissively. “Nothing…” She raised an eyebrow at him and he gave a small sigh. “Just… memories of when I was a youngling.”

“Like?”

“Uh…” he gave a light shrug, “Hiding in the library from my brothers so I could do my lessons in peace… read what I wanted…”

“Yes, the impression I got from them was … not … one of … enjoyment of libraries.”

“Or learning in general.” Lucien agreed, then after a pause added, “Except Eris.”

“He does seem… different… to them.”

Lucien’s russet eye darkened as he met her gaze. “More cruel and calculating.” He said. “He’s certainly more clever than the others.”

“Yet he’s the one Rhys wants to replace your father.”

“Eris has a brain.” Lucien replied, “He’s more likely to see reason and act accordingly.”

“Did you really have nobody…” Elain looked at him. It was clear his brothers had no affection for him. Had he not had anybody to play with or confide in? Sorrow trickled down the bond before Lucien had clearly leashed it.

“There was a reason I liked to wander.” He murmured, “Befriend fae that my father thought were not appropriate acquaintances for the son of the High Lord.”

“…Jesminda.” Elain breathed.

“And her ilk.”

Elain maintained her hold on Lucien’s hands as she looked at him. She had never been alone like that in her life. She had always had Nesta, and then Feyre. She couldn’t even fathom loneliness in the way that Lucien must have experienced it during his time here. It was no wonder, she thought, that he had become so loyal to Tamlin and the home he had tried to build in the Spring Court. “It must have been so difficult,” she said after a moment, “Every time you had to come back here as the emissary for the Spring Court…”

He gave her a bitter smile. “I had a role to play, and I played it.” He told her.

“Did they ever try to hurt you?”

“They were far too afraid of Tamlin for that.”

“Feyre told me…” Elain drew an uncertain breath, “ She told me that three of your brothers followed you when you left.” She saw the moment he figured out where she was going with that, “That… Tamlin killed one, and you killed another…”

“And the other escaped back home to deliver the message that I was now under Tamlin’s protection, and an attack on me would be considered an attack on him and an act of war…”

“You… had to kill your brother…”

Lucien just nodded, his eyes on her face. “It… was… not like the relationship you have with your sisters…”

“No, I imagine not.”

“Still…” he agreed, “It was not something I had ever wanted to have to do.”

“They would have killed you…”

“Yes.”

“Why…” Elain frowned, “Why did they treat you like that? I mean… they seem okay with one another. Why were you the outsider?”

A small laugh escaped Lucien before he cut it off. “I don’t know.” He said, “Because I wasn’t like them? I didn’t have the same penchant for brutality and violence? Perhaps they could sense that, right from the start? Perhaps I was just a threat to them? Perhaps it was that my father has always hated me and that made it okay for them to target me the way they did?”

“How did you survive it all?” Elain couldn’t help the mental image of a little Lucien hiding in a library from his older brothers, clutching his book protectively and preying that they wouldn’t find him. She didn’t know if it was a real scene that she was being shown, or if she had imagined it up, but it stung nonetheless.

Lucien smiled at her, however, and lifted one of his hands from hers to tap at his temple with a slender finger. Ah, of course. He was clever. “I’m glad that you left…” she told him, and he tilted his head, looking at her thoughtfully.

“Are you?”

“You shouldn’t have to constantly be treated that way. To always be looking over your shoulder…” Elain shook her head, “That’s… I can’t even imagine living like that.” She watched his russet eye go a little unfocused and she knew that he was remembering something. Darkness swirled down the bond, and Elain looked around the room for something to try and distract him with. 

She noticed his pack sitting by the door, and she squeezed the hand that she still held in hers. “Tell me which books you brought with you.”

Lucien’s eyes returned to hers, and she saw the questioning look in them before he glanced toward his pack and nodded. “You knew I brought more than one?” he asked, and she nodded. 

“I did.”

“I see.” 

Elain listened as he told her about his choices. After several minutes, the emotions reaching her down the bond had eased and become lighter. She could feel his interest in the topics he talked about, and that pleased her. She sat, enjoying his easy conversation for much of the afternoon, until the sun began to set and they were summoned for dinner.


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

**Chapter 24**

Striding into the dining hall, Elain tried not to let her jaw drop too much at the grand opulence of the place. Everything was a gorgeous warm colour, either red or orange or a really delightful rich brown that she quite admired. The windows were hung with a heavy velvet that added to the mute hushness that she realised she had found quite peaceful since they had arrived.

Eris and Beron were the only ones in the dining room and both turned to look at Elain and Lucien when they came through the door. Elain spared only a fleeting glance for them before her eyes moved on to more. She noticed that their dinner wasn’t on the table that Eris was seated at, but rather there were dishes of endless various foods set along a low table by the far wall. Evidently, one was to select what they wished to eat and take their own plate to the table. This surprised Elain, as it seemed far more formal than she had expected. A moment later, however, she had considered Beron and his sons, and determined that they all seemed to relish control rather significantly and so perhaps it wasn’t all that surprising that they would prefer to select their own food rather than have someone else put it down in front of them.

Moving toward the grazing table when Lucien’s hand settled against her lower back, Elain tried to ignore the way she could feel Beron’s eyes following them closely. When Lucien had picked up an empty plate from the stack at the end of the table and handed it to her, Elain felt him jump as his father spoke. “Lucien, come here. I wish to speak with you.”

Elain watched him straighten his shoulders before he turned and strode across the room to the High Lord. Able to feel his apprehension through the bond, Elain tried to busy herself by turning back to the table. Letting her gaze move up and down its length, she tried to take in all of the options available to her. Even the colours were pretty. There were more reds and oranges, with generous amounts of crisp whites and soft greens. Elain picked up several grapes and set them on her plate as her eyes moved further up the table. She took in the roasted almonds and the autumnal fruits. There looked to be figs and pears and Elain took a selection of each. Even further along, there looked to be a selection of meats, but before Elain could get any closer she was surrounded by large bodies.

“Elain…” A rough voice came from directly behind her and she froze.

“Are you feeling better after earlier?” A different voice from her left. Nodding, Elain tried to keep her face neutral as she felt a flash of anger and fear from Lucien across the room.

“I am…” She turned her head to meet the amber eyes of one of Lucien’s brothers.

“That’s good to hear.” The voice from behind her again and, when Elain realised that she couldn’t move in any direction as three of them were blocking her on all sides, she nodded.

“Have you tried some of this?” She turned to meet another set of amber eyes on her right and was greeted with a vulpine grin before the tall faerie set some strange looking cheese on her plate.

“I… I haven’t.” She replied, jumping slightly when one of them set a hand against her hip, moving her up the table. She could feel Lucien straight up burning with anger now, and she focused her gaze on the table before her. Not knowing what to do, Elain leaned forward and collected several pieces of apple, gasping when the male behind her pressed against her as he reached over her to select a fig.

“That’s good…” he breathed in her ear, before he dropped some sort of glazed meat onto her plate. Elain looked at it doubtfully, trying to shift away from him, but she had nowhere to go as she was firmly against the table now. Unable to move, Elain just stood there as the three faeries surrounding her continued to pile various food onto the plate she was holding, their hands moving and sliding over her as they did so. Across the room, she could hear Lucien’s heartbeat thundering quickly, but also Beron’s deep voice as he continued to speak at an unhurried pace. The frustration coming out of Lucien was palpable, and Elain could feel his desperation to get away from Beron so that he could come and interject himself between her and his brothers, but the High Lord was clearly not done with his spiel. 

Not knowing what to do, and not really wanting to turn and meet the gaze of any of the huge solid males around her Elain shuffled as subtly as she could toward the end of the table, hoping that they would release her when she got there. It would be ideal, she figured, to get free before Lucien managed to escape from Beron and exploded. His brothers had done nothing more than touch her and make her uncomfortable, and she suspected that it had all been entirely for their brother’s benefit. They hadn’t done anything that would excuse the reaction they were trying to work him into, and if Lucien did anything at all it would be him that Beron would punish. 

Reaching the end of the table, her wrist hurting from the weight of her overladen plate, she jumped in surprise when she just about walked into Eris. The other three brothers paused, and then stepped back from her. 

“I think she has enough food.” Eris said flatly, reaching out and lifting half an orange from Elain’s plate and taking it to his own lips.

Elain blinked up at him before realising that she was free of them now, and she hastily walked away from them just as Beron seated himself at the head of the long table. Lucien met Elain halfway across the room, his gentle hand brushing her shoulder was more of a comfort than she had expected. He took two more steps and swiped another empty plate from the stack before returning to Elain’s side and guiding her to empty seats at the dining table. When they were seated a healthy distance from Beron, Elain began redistributing the ridiculous amount of food from her plate to Lucien’s empty plate.

She could feel him wanting to ask if she was alright, but knew that he didn’t want anyone to overhear so she gave him a small smile. After several minutes Lucien seemed to relax until one of his huge brothers sank down into the chair on Elain’s other side while two more sat down opposite them. Turning her head, Elain looked at the faerie now sitting beside her, recognising him as one of the brothers who had held Lucien down on the ground while Jesminda had been killed. Hard amber eyes met her gaze and he gave her a wicked smile. 

“Are you enjoying the Autumn Court, Elain?” His voice almost sounded like dried leaves scraping across stone in the wind and Elain resisted a shudder when Lucien gave a clearly audible snarl. 

“You will behave in a civilised manner while at this table.” Beron snapped, “I don’t know how it is in the Night Court, but savages are not welcome to dine here.”

She felt Lucien struggle to leash his temper, and the smirks from his brothers suggested they knew what he was trying to do as well. Eris got to his feet when Ashk entered the room and Elain watched him stride across the room to help her collect a plate before returning to the table with her and making sure that she had everything she needed before he resumed his seat. Beron had watched the whole thing with a sneer.

When cold fingers brushed her wrist Elain jumped slightly, looking back up to the male grinning beside her. “The Autumn Court, Lady?” he asked, his eyes sliding past her to Lucien as his smirk widened.

Shifting her wrist away from his hand, Elain just nodded at the question. “Yes, it is most beautiful.”

When she felt Lucien shift in his seat, she glanced at him. He was clearly struggling to leash his anger, and she could see the tension in the hand he held flat on the table, muscles clearly taught with his effort to contain himself. Elain slipped her hand under the table and into his lap, taking his other shaking hand in hers. His eyes slid toward her, surprise clear on his face. She just looked back at him as she felt him cool as his fingers wrapped around her hand and a wave of thankfulness reached her down the bond. 

If Lucien’s awful brothers were going to continually try to bait him into doing something to threaten the alliance the entire time they were here, things were going to be even more complicated than Elain had first thought.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

**Chapter 25**

The moment they walked back into their shared room, Lucien strode into the adjoining bathroom and closed the door. Elain moved about the room, unpacking the things from her bag that she had yet to organise. She could feel Lucien standing just on the other side of the door, trying to get himself to calm down and, as she listened to his heartbeat ever so slightly beginning to quieten, she hoped that it wasn’t going to be like this every day they were here. She didn’t know how he had the self-control to keep himself restrained when she could feel what was going on inside him. His brothers had continued to taunt him throughout dinner with both barbed comments as well as through Elain herself. The one sitting next to her had touched her at every given opportunity, his eyes always on Lucien as he had done so, and Elain had figured that her best option had been to act as if she hadn’t noticed. Feeling how the anger and fear had built within Lucien, however, she might need to rethink her responses for tomorrow.

She had just set her books on the bedside table and begun to pull her night things from her bag when the bathroom door opened again and Lucien slowly emerged. A glance his way told Elain that he had only slightly managed to calm down. 

“Are you alright?” she asked softly and he nodded stiffly. 

“Yes. Sorry,” he replied, “I … just need to sit for a bit. I’ll be fine.”

Figuring that he might want some privacy while he got himself sorted out, Elain pulled her nightgown from her bag. “Okay, I’ll have a bath then…”

*

When Elain had gone into the bathroom, Lucien sank on to the edge of the large bed with a sigh. He listened to her begin to fill the tub and he tried to even out his breathing. At least his heart wasn’t pounding in his chest as it had been by the end of dinner. He knew that he shouldn’t react to what his brothers had been doing, but he couldn’t help the anger that had begun to build within him. It had been hard enough to keep his face even and not launch himself out of his chair, he didn’t stand a hope of completely ignoring it. He didn’t care about what they had said to him or about him, but if they thought were going to use Elain to get at him… 

He couldn’t stop them. That was what both angered and terrified him. They had been careful enough to not do anything that they could be reprimanded for and, on the surface, it had only been polite conversation that one might have with any guest visiting the court. But, Lucien knew, they had continued to engage with her and touch her, all the while looking at him, to show him that they could. They could do what they liked and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Just like what had happened to Jesminda. Just the thought of the same hands that had held him down while Jesminda had been killed now touching Elain made Lucien want to vomit.

Getting to his feet, he moved across the room to drag the orange couch over Infront of the door. There was no way anybody would be coming through there without him moving the couch out of the way first. The added extra source of security gave him a bit of peace and he returned to sit on the bed. He had to find a way to deal with this. He couldn’t walk around the Court for the next few days this much of a mess. It made him vulnerable and, through him, it made Elain vulnerable. Also, he thought, gritting his teeth, he refused to give the bastards the satisfaction of knowing they could still have this much of an effect on him. 

He just needed to relax. He needed to just sit and let it all go so that, tomorrow, he could walk out of this room and play the role he had become so adept at playing all these years. He would walk into his father’s hall and be cocky and sarcastic, as if he didn’t have a care in the world and it was all so far beneath his notice. Bored and aristocratic. He knew the role well. 

*

As Elain pulled her nightgown over her head, she listened to Lucien’s heartbeat through the bathroom door. It seemed relatively normal and, she figured, he must have gotten himself to calm down. Hanging her towel over a railing, she glanced at her reflection, running a hand through her loose golden brown hair before she turned and walked back into the other room.  
Lucien was sitting on the bed with his back to her as he stared at the wall, though she knew that he was aware she had returned to the room as his heart quickened in pace ever so slightly, the way it always did when she entered a room. 

“How was your bath?” he asked softly. 

“It was nice.” She told him, moving toward the bed and he turned to look at her a moment later. 

Elain froze when Lucien’s eyes moved over her and his expression changed. Fire seemed to spark behind his russet eye and she released a soft breath when she felt a bolt of heat flare between her thighs in response to the way he was now looking at her. She heard his metallic eye click and whirr as he looked her over again, and she knew that he either knew about or had felt her response to him. With feline grace, Lucien got to his feet and began to walk toward Elain and she realised that the primal instinct that was so clearly driving him now must have been so very close to the surface since they had arrived. She was surprised it had taken this long to come out, really. Again, she knew not to run. This time, however, Elain realised that she didn’t want to.

When Lucien reached her, Elain just looked up at him, meeting his burning gaze. Tentatively, he lifted a hand to rest on her shoulder, gently drawing her into himself and she went without resistance. When his other hand came to her cheek, Elain allowed him to bend and kiss her, her own hands coming to his waist. Through the kiss, she could feel his desperation and his relief that nothing had happened to her with his brothers. When Lucien lifted Elain to himself, he deepened the kiss, and Elain slid her arms around his shoulders, one hand making its way up the back of his neck into his vibrant hair and she was both comfortable and hot at the same time. After a few moments, Elain began to respond to Lucien’s kiss and, as she threaded her fingers through his hair, trailing her tongue along his lower lip, she realised that she was kissing him back.

The warm spark that she had been able to feel within Lucien seemed to ignite into a raging inferno as she kissed him, and then he had broken the kiss to bring his lips to her throat. Elain’s thoughts splintered, and she couldn’t so much as think. She wasn’t sure how it had happened, but the next time she became aware of herself was when she found herself on her back on the bed. Lucien’s weight pressing her into the soft covers was far more pleasing than she had anticipated, and she felt herself blush as she realised that her legs were now tightly wrapped around his waist. When his hot mouth trailed its way down her neck to a particularly sensitive hollow and she felt him rocking gently against her, Elain let out a wanton moan that shocked her back to rational thought.

She could feel Lucien hard and pressed firmly against her as his teeth gently scraped her skin. Elain blinked when one of his hands began trailing up her thigh, dragging her nightgown with it, and then she was pressing her hands against his chest and shaking her head. “Don’t…”

He stopped instantly. His hand on her thigh froze and he released her throat, pushing himself higher with one hand to meet her eyes for a second. Elain had been trying to think of something else to say, or to explain, but before she could figure out how to form words, Lucien had retreated. He was off of her in a second and backing away across the room, sinking onto the orange couch in front of the door and drawing his feet up after himself, his eyes never leaving hers as she sat up to watch him. “Sorry…” she murmured, pulling the hem of her nightgown back down over her legs for modesty’s sake. 

“It’s okay.” He said, his voice sounding strained. “I understand… I won’t… not until you want me.”

Elain just stared at him, trying to sort through everything she could feel through the bond as emotion after emotion rolled off of him. As Lucien began to get himself under control, however, he had evidently begun shutting down anything he was sending her way and, soon enough, all she could feel was the usual base desire for her, mixed with anxiety.

“Thank you.” She murmured, drawing a blanket around her shoulders as her eyes moved over Lucien again. He just gave her a small smile and a curt nod.

“As you wish, Petal.”


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

**Chapter 26**

Lucien awoke early the next morning, tucked with his back against the burnt orange velvet of the couch upon which he had slept. As soon as his eyes opened, they found Elain. She was still asleep, he could see, as she lay wrapped tightly in the heavy bed covers. Sitting up, he moved to get a better view, his eyes moving across her, taking in her golden brown hair splayed out across the crimson pillow and the utterly peaceful expression on her pretty face. Lucien’s heart began to beat more steadily as the urge to ‘protect’ rose in him. Elain always looked innocent but, like this, she looked even more so. Lucien resisted the urge to get to his feet and cross the room to the bed, wanting to get closer to her. He hadn’t gotten off the couch since he had backed away from her the previous night and promised her that he wouldn’t do anything until she wanted him. Cauldron, how he hoped that she would decide that she wanted him.

They had come so close last night. He hadn’t been able to help the thoughts that had filled his mind when Elain had first come out of the bathroom in her nightgown, her hair unbound and curling around her face. As soon as the thoughts had crossed his mind, he’d felt a surge of heat down the bond and, knowing that it had come from her in response to him, Lucien hadn’t been able to resist going to her. When he had lifted her to himself, he’d nearly died of shock when Elain had begun to kiss him back. His mind had been wiped practically blank when she had begun licking at him and, without considering what he had been doing, Lucien had somehow gotten them to the bed. Sinking down onto Elain, and pressing her into the soft bedcovers, had sent all kinds of desire through him and when she had wrapped her legs around him, he’d known that he was beyond hard. He hadn’t entirely been thinking for the next few minutes, and it was all kind of foggy in his mind until her hands had pushed at his chest. 

Knowing that he needed to get himself under control, Lucien had forced himself to the other side of the room and, as he watched her now, he knew that he would do it again. He would always pull himself into line for her. It had been easier to do last night than that night in the kitchen. He supposed that was because he knew that she would still be sleeping in the room with him, and he didn’t have to let her go where he couldn’t follow. He had also reminded himself that Elain was a virgin, and that had eased the primal instinct in him to have her then and there. That innocence was worth protecting, and he wasn’t going to allow her first experience of such things be some rushed and mindless encounter. Especially when she hadn’t even decided if she wanted him or not.

With a start, Lucien realised that Elain’s brown eyes were now open and she was watching him from her curled position in the bed. “Good morning, Petal.”

“Hi.” She murmured, not moving in the slightest. 

Swinging his legs around, Lucien lowered his feet to the floor and sat up to stretch. He groaned at the movement, deciding that the couch was not the most comfortable pace he’d ever slept. He noticed Elain’s eyes follow him and he stood up to stretch again. Still, she watched him, and he wondered if she was thinking about last night. When a light blush began to flush across her cheeks, he figured that she probably was indeed, and he gave her his best courtier smile. A laugh escaped him when she gave an exasperated groan and pulled the covers up over her face. 

“Come on, love.” He said, moving toward the bed and gathering a handful of the covers before trying to gently pry them away from her. He did not expect her grip to be so strong however, and he needed to rethink his tactic. “We need to go and have some breakfast… You can’t miss out on the honeyed pears…”

Her gorgeous dark eyes appeared, peering at him over the edge of the covers. “Honeyed pears?”

Lucien grinned and nodded. “They’re delicious.”

Elain sat up without warning and Lucien ended up half swamped in the bedcovers. He dropped them back onto the bed as she crawled to her feet and then cast him a suspicious look. “They had better be…”

It didn’t take the two of them all that long to get dressed and, before he knew it, they were making their way to the dining hall. “Lucien…?”

He turned his head toward her as she walked beside him, her arm tucked through his. “Hm?”

“I was rethinking my response,” she said softly, “to your brothers constantly touching me…” her eyes slid his way when his heart began pounding erratically. 

“I see…” he just about forced the words out.

“I thought that by saying nothing they would become bored or disinterested.” She told him, “But that didn’t work because it wasn’t my reaction they were after to begin with.”

He couldn’t deny the truth of that and just nodded. “So, what’s your new thought?” he asked her.

“I’m not going to pretend like I don’t notice it.” Elain lifted her chin and looked straight ahead as they entered the dining hall. 

The first thing Lucien noticed was that Beron was not present. In fact, the only one in the room was Eris who was seated at his usual spot at the table. Stiffening as his eldest brother’s amber eyes followed them across the room, Lucien tried to pretend like he wasn’t bothered. He moved with Elain up the table by the wall as they selected their breakfast, Elain giving him a penetrating look as she transferred a honeyed pear to her plate, and then they headed to the dining table to sit.

“Where is father?” Lucien asked, glancing Eris’ way up the table. He High Lord was usually the first at breakfast every morning. 

“He’s unwell.” Eris replied simply. “You’ll discuss things with me. It would have been how it happened anyway.” Lucien nodded, his eyes going to Elain when she made a small pleasured sound. 

Brown eyes met his as she pulled her fork from her mouth. “Good, yes?” he grinned at her when he noticed a piece of her honeyed pear was missing. She nodded and stuck her fork into the rest of it.

“I was hoping we might set our talk for this afternoon.” Eris said, drawing Lucien’s attention once more. Lucien turned to look at him, and Eris continued. “I have prior engagements this morning.”

“Okay.” Lucien watched as Eris’ amber eyes slid to Elain as she made another appreciative sound and he saw his brother’s eyebrow raise ever so slightly. Before Lucien could say anything further, however, Eris’ gaze shifted to the door and he half got to his feet. 

“Stay there.” Their mother’s voice said gently, and Eris slowly sank back into his seat. Looking around with a smile, Lucien watched as the Lady of the Autumn Court collected her breakfast and joined them at the table.

“I am starving!” the rough voice of one of Lucien’s brothers called not a moment later, and Lucien resisted a sigh, forcing himself to keep his focus on his own plate. He clenched his teeth when his brother dropped down into the seat on the other side of Elain just as he had at dinner and Elain set her fork down carefully. “And how are you this morning?” Lucien’s eyes followed his brother’s large hand as it slid up Elain’s forearm to her wrist.

Swallowing his anger, Lucien didn’t have time to react before Elain’s head snapped in the direction of the male beside her. 

“I would prefer if you kept your hands off me, thank you.”

The large hand retracted and Lucien saw surprise in his brother’s hard eyes. “Would you?”

“Yes. It’s rude to touch someone you don’t know.”

Those cold amber eyes raked over Elain in a way that made Lucien’s blood boil, but then his brother had gotten to his feet and strode from the dining hall without another word. Elain turned her eyes on Lucien and he wanted to kiss her then and there. Instead, however, he stuck his fork in his honeyed pear and shifted it over on to her plate. The smile she gave him in return was just as sweet.


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

**Chapter 27**

Once breakfast was over, Lucien had promised to show Elain around the house and the grounds. She had been thoroughly enchanted by the spectacular beauty of just about everything she looked at and she supposed this had been the kind of place she had always imagined a faerie court might look like. Everything looked ethereal and otherworldly, and she loved it.  
Once Lucien had shown her the formal rooms that guests were often entertained in, he took her upstairs. She had told him that she wanted to see where he had used to live and, though she could see the hesitation in his eyes, he had agreed.

“I… don’t even know what the room would look like now.” He admitted, taking Elain up some stairs.

“Do you think it would have been cleared out?”

“The thought had occurred to me…”

Watching him out of the corner of her eye, Elain could feel the warring emotions swirling through Lucien. He didn’t know what he even wanted to find. Would it have been better to find the room untouched? To still have that connection to this place and these people? Or, would it be better to find that they had cleared his room out, cutting him entirely out of somewhere he had grown up and tried to belong? He didn’t know, and Elain felt sorry for him. 

After following Lucien down several more hallways, Elain found herself standing in front of a large oak door. Lucien glanced at her before taking a deep breath and reaching for the door handle, pushing the heavy weight open as he moved inside. Elain stepped in after him, her eyes flicking around the room.  
It hadn’t been lived in for quite some time, that was obvious. Longer, Elain realised, than she had been alive. Heavy velvet curtains hung crimson and magnificent by the windows, letting in pale golden light that cast the rest of the room in an ethereal glow. Her eyes moved along the walls, taking in the dark wooden bookshelves, filled with gilded tomes, to the mahogany desk in a nearby corner. The bed was draped in a dark brown bedspread that looked as if it had been sitting outside under an autumn tree, leaves having fallen to rest upon it and, as she moved closer, Elain noted that each of the leaves had been embellished with golden thread. 

Turning toward Lucien, she paused when she caught sight of his face. He was standing in the centre of the room, staring unseeingly toward the windows. Looking at him in the golden light, his hair tied back and shining almost as brightly as the golden thread of his bedspread, Elain noticed how well he suited the room. “…was it like this when it was yours?”

He appeared to shake himself, turning his head to look at her, and even his eyes, both russet and gold, were at home here. “Mostly.” He responded, voice gentle. “… most of my personal things are gone, but the room itself is unchanged.”

“… do you miss it?” He looked so much like the room, it seemed strange to Elain that he had existed for so long in a place that was not this.

A strange expression worked its way across Lucien’s face and she could see him trying to figure out an answer to that question. Turning her own eyes back to the room, Elain stiffened as her vision shifted. 

_Standing by the window was a tiny thing, clearly Lucien, with his vibrant red hair, clutching a book to his chest as he stared out past the curtains. Elain wasn’t exactly experienced with guessing the age of fae younglings, knowing they aged differently to mortals, but she could tell he was very young. When she blinked, he vanished, and instead was now curled on the centre of the large bed, possibly slightly older now. Elain watched as he cried, and she could somehow feel his hurt and confusion. He didn’t understand why the others excluded him. Taking a step toward him, Elain blinked again and he was gone. Instead, he was now a young male, not quite in his prime, seething with anger as he paced back and forth in front of the bookshelf. He had begun to disagree with his father and brothers, but they never heard a thing he said. The Lucien that appeared next, lying on his back on the bed was happier, she would have been able to tell from the wide smile that spread across his face if she hadn’t been able to feel it. Excitement, contentment and, she thought, possibly love. This was the Lucien who had been in love with Jesminda. When she blinked again, he was still on the bed, but much younger once again, and she watched as Ashk bent over him, tucking the covers around him and smoothing his ruby hair back from his face. The warmth of that scene washed over Elain before she blinked again and he was back to pacing, older and angrier. Not pacing, she thought, watching him move around the room. He was packing. She watched as he hurried around, grabbing things from drawers and cupboards, and she could feel the devastation and the rage coursing through him. He was leaving._

Staggering back, Elain shook herself, her vision returning to normal. Lucien, her Lucien, was standing where he had been before, in the centre of the room, looking at her apprehensively. 

“What did you see?” he asked, wariness in his voice.

Elain just looked at him. He looked like he didn’t know what to do, standing there, his fingers fiddling restlessly with the cuffs of his jacket as his eyes focussed intently upon her. Part of him longed for this place, she could feel it, but she could also feel the certainty that he could never belong here again. Too much had happened, and it would never be home. So much sadness and anguish filled this room, and Elain wanted to make it stop, take it away. He stood, watching her, and waiting for her answer, and Elain made the decision as she met his gaze. 

She crossed the room in three steps until she was before Lucien when she went up on her toes, lifting her hands to tug him down toward her, and she kissed him. His surprise lasted only a second before she felt his arms wind around her, one around her waist and the other lower as he lifted her to himself. Elain felt her feet leave the ground, and she wrapped one of her own arms around his shoulders, her other hand remaining at his jaw.

His heartbeat had quickened, she could hear it thundering in his chest, and the fire and heat that was often so close to the surface within him flared to life, but Lucien did not seek to take control of the kiss. There was no demand from him at all, he simply allowed her to do as she wished, holding her to himself as he responded to whatever she chose to do. Elain stroked her fingers slowly along his jaw as she sought to deepen the kiss and Lucien tightened his hold on her as she slipped her tongue into his mouth, licking tentatively at him, pleased that he still tasted of honeyed pears. The soft groan he made sent pleasant tingles through Elain, encouraging her to continue what she was doing.

When Lucien put Elain back on her feet, she held on to him a moment longer. “What was that for?” he asked, both his russet and gold eye meeting her gaze. 

“I…” Elain traced her fingers along his jaw as she had before, her eyes moving back and forth across his handsome face. “I wanted you to have a nice memory in here…” His eyebrows raised in surprise and Elain release him at last, taking a step back.

“I think you managed that…” he sounded breathless and Elain smiled.

“What did you see?” he asked again, his eyes moving to sweep the room. 

“Your life.” She replied softly, “Pieces of it…” He nodded, his eyes still sweeping the room and he moved toward the desk as Elain watched.

“I wonder…” Lucien murmured softly as he knelt down and pulled the drawer of the desk out, reaching inside and running his hand along the top, out of sight. She heard a small click and then he withdrew his hand, something clutched inside. As he stood up, looking at what he’d found, Elain took a small step closer. He turned toward her a moment later, reaching a hand out and Elain moved to meet him. Taking one of her hands carefully, Lucien placed something cool into her palm. 

Looking at it, Elain drew a soft breath. It was a necklace, delicate and golden. She traced a finger over the tiny golden leaves which framed a setting holding the most beautiful garnet stone she had ever seen. “It’s stunning.” She told him, lifting her hand to give it back. Lucien glanced at her face then back to her hand. 

“I want you to have it.”

“Me…?”

“I always intended to give it to my mate, if I ever found…” he paused, “At the time I had been waiting for the bond to snap into place with Jesminda… but clearly she wasn’t…” He looked at her again and Elain felt his apprehension. “Sorry, I understand if you don’t want to…” 

Closing her hand around the necklace, Elain shook her head. “I’d love to wear it.” Lucien’s expression brightened and he held his hand out. Elain placed the necklace in his hand and turned, sweeping her hair aside so that he could put it on her. She realised that he’d heated it slightly when she felt it settle warm and comfortable around her, the garnet sitting flush against her skin and, lifting a hand to touch it gently, Elain wondered just what her acceptance of this meant to him. She didn’t even know what it meant to herself. 

When she turned back to Lucien, his eyes moved slowly over her and a pleased expression crossed his features. “The setting suits you.” He said gently, and Elain smiled at him. 

“…will you show me the garden before you have to go and speak to Eris?” she asked. Nodding, Lucien cast one last glance around his old room before leading her toward the door. 

“I’m glad you asked to see up here…”

Elain followed him, glancing back at the room herself. She had learned quite a few things, she supposed, and she had a better understanding of Lucien. “Me, too.” She replied, allowing him to take her hand before he closed the door.


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

**Chapter 28**

The air seemed to tinkle with bells as leaves fell around Elain. She stopped walking on the path and looked up toward the trees overhead. If she lived here for five hundred years, Elain doubted she would ever not be enchanted by those trees. Lucien, still holding her hand, came to a stop just ahead of her and she saw him turn to wait. Glancing at him, she smiled. 

“Enjoying yourself?” he asked.

“It’s like walking through a jewel box.” She replied, “The colours…”

Lucien nodded, tilting his head, and Elain’s eyes moved over him. He was just as colourful as everything around them and her smile grew wider.

When Ashk appeared across the courtyard and strode toward them, Lucien stepped slowly away from Elain, releasing her hand. “It’s almost time for my meeting with Eris.” He said gently, smiling at his mother when she had reached them.

“Already?” Elain asked, glancing around them. She hadn’t noticed how long they had been strolling the grounds for, and the light here was strange enough that she hadn’t noticed the day growing long. Lucien smiled more widely at her, looking pleased at her apparent disappointment. 

“Don’t worry, Petal.” He said, his voice smooth and elegant, “I’ll leave you with my mother, and I will see you soon enough.” Actual disappointment coursed through Elain when he turned and strode away, and she didn’t notice Ashk move closer until the Lady’s hand touched her arm.

“What if they fight?” she murmured, and Ashk rubbed her arm slightly. 

“They will not.”

“How can you be sure?” Elain turned to look at the redheaded faerie standing beside her. 

“I know my boys.” Pretty russet eyes moved over Elain’s face and then dropped to her throat. Ashk lifted a gentle hand again and lightly traced the golden leaves of the necklace Elain was now wearing. “You’re wearing it…”

Tilting her head, Elain looked at her. “You know it?”

“Yes.” Ashk’s fingers moved over the garnet. “He showed it to me when he had it made.” 

“Did…” Elain paused for a moment, glancing around the courtyard. “Did you know about Jesminda?”

Ashk’s hands fell to her own sides. “I knew Lucien had fallen in love with a female he’d met nearby… I did not know who or what she was.” Elain’s heart twisted and she lifted her own hand to the garnet, looking back up to meet Ashk’s eyes, “He told me it was intended for his mate. That, Elain, has always been you. Since long before you were born.”

Letting out a deep breath, Elain looked up at the perpetually falling leaves. She knew that Ashk was trying to comfort her, letting her know that Lucien’s love for Jesminda did not somehow lessen what he could feel for her, but telling her that this had somehow all been preordained centuries before did not help with the decisions she had been wrestling with for so long now. She wanted the choice. She wanted to fall in love with Lucien because of who he was, not because it was somehow destined that she do so. Realising that she’d had that thought, Elain bit her lower lip.

“If I recall correctly,” Ashk said, “you are to select flowers for a book?”

“Yes.” Elain murmured, her hand slipping into her pocket and pulling out the small book that Lucien had given her. “I am collecting my sketches in here…”

“Let us walk, then.” Ashk said, “We shall see if you like what we find.”

“I like everything…” Elain murmured, falling into step beside the other female. “Everything here is so pretty.”

“Not everybody agrees.” Ashk told her, smiling at Elain, “But in my opinion, no other court compares.”

“Have you seen all of the others?”

“Yes.” Ashk smiled at her again. 

They talked easily for quite a while as Ashk walked Elain from courtyard to courtyard, showing her all of her favourite flowers. Elain had sketched a few, and asked the Lady about them to record the information for later. She had just finished a sketch and had gotten to her feet, sweeping the dried leaves from her dress as she slipped her book into her pocket when someone came out of a nearby door. Elain paused when she recognised the brother who had sat next to her at dinner and then breakfast this morning. His eyes met hers across the courtyard and he paused in his steps, his glance flicking to his mother, before he turned and went back inside. 

Ashk’s arm slid around Elain’s shoulders, turning her away and heading back the way they had come up the path. “I do believe he was looking for you.”

“For me?” Elain asked, “Why?”

“I couldn’t say.” Ashk replied, “But I suppose it probably has something to do with what you said to him this morning.”

Elain shuddered. “I don’t imagine he liked that.”

“No.” Ashk agreed.

It was nearing sunset when Lucien found them again and, Elain was pleased to note, he did not appear to have been fighting. He joined them in their walk through the final courtyard of the day and Elain made sure to slip off to the side, sketching a flower she knew she did not intend to include in her book, in order to give them a few moments alone. From the corner of her eye, she watched them. Lucien appeared to practically glow under his mothers attentions, and Elain had not seen the Lady’s face so bright. Feyre had told Elain that Lucien was his mother’s favourite son, and Elain was quite certain that she had been correct. Mother and son talked quietly, animatedly, to one another, their hands joined and never moving further apart than this allowed and, by the time Elain got to her feet, she suspected that they would be late for dinner.

They needn’t have bothered hurrying, for Beron was not at dinner either. Lucien’s brothers all sat across the table beside Eris, and didn’t so much as look Elain’s way. She could feel how much this pleased Lucien who kept smiling at her. The rest of dinner passed without incident, and Elain was yawning by the time she and Lucien returned to their room.

“A successful day?” She asked when he’d closed the door. 

“You could say that.” He replied, his eyes moving over her and coming to rest on the necklace she still wore. 

“Did everything go okay with Eris?”

“It was fine.” Lucien moved toward her, “He seems to be the one running things lately.” Elain held his eyes as he came to stand just before her, one of his large hands coming up to touch the garnet resting against her chest. “I think he might be ready to claim the throne.”

“Would that be good or bad?” Elain tried to read Lucien’s expression as she stood her ground, shuddering when his fingers lightly brushed her shin. 

“I would like to be gone when he does.” He said after a moment, “No doubt there will be blood…”

“Will they try to kill you?” Elain asked, her own fingers skimming the hem of his jacket.

“Possibly.”

“…he’ll wait until we’re gone, though, right?” Fear clenched at Elain’s heart and she suddenly felt herself clenching a handful of his jacket.

He smiled at her, lifting a hand to push her hair back over her shoulder. “I believe so. One less contender for what he wants…”

“Would you…” Elain asked, “Want it, I mean?”

Lucien tilted his head, considering. “I never did.” He replied, “And I wouldn’t want it as things are now…”

“If things were different?” She asked softly.

“Not really. Though, the thought of being able to shape a place into what I want… make it perfect…”

“To create your own home…”

“Yes.” He agreed. “That might be worth it.” His fingers ghosted across Elain’s shoulder and down her arm and she stood just looking up at him before she made herself let go of his jacket. 

“I think I should have a bath.” She said softly, jumping slightly when there was a knock at the door.

Lucien moved instantly, putting himself in front of her, an arm out to keep her back. He hadn’t yet dragged the couch back in front of the door, so it was capable of opening. “Come in…” he called, and Elain could sense the tension in him as the door slowly opened inward to reveal his mother. He relaxed at the sight of her and Elain felt herself let out a relieved breath.

As Ashk stepped into the room and closed the door behind herself, Elain could clearly see something was on her mind. “Lucien, love…” The Lady’s voice sounded somewhat shaky. “I must speak with you.”


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

**Chapter 29**

Unable to take his eyes off of his mother, Lucien turned to keep her in his sight as she moved around the room. The bathroom door clicked closed as Elain disappeared inside, no doubt to give them some privacy, and worry began to seed itself inside of him.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, wanting her to just tell him. He took several steps toward her. “Did father do something?” The look she gave him stopped Lucien cold and he just stood looking at her.

“I…” she ran a frustrated hand through her hair, and Lucien grew more worried. 

“Are you hurt?” he asked, and she shook her head. 

“No… I’ve been dreading this...”

“Dreading what?”

He blinked when she moved toward him, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders as she pushed him back slightly. “Sit down.”

“Okay.” He sat on the edge of the bed, and she kept her hands on his shoulders as he looked up at her. “What is it?” he lifted his own hand to her sleeve, his attention caught on the regret in her eyes.

“I never told you this to keep you safe.” She said gently, one of her hands coming up and smoothing his hair as she had when he was small. “As long as you didn’t know, I was allowed to keep you with me.” Lucien just stared up at her, worry growing within him. 

“Know what?” he asked.

His mother frowned, clearly trying to work up the courage to say whatever it was she had been keeping from him. Lucien just waited, his eyes never leaving her face. “Ah…” she stroked his hair again, “Beron… is not your father.” Her russet eyes met his and Lucien was sure he stopped breathing.

“…what?”

Her face crumpled and she dropped to her knees before him, taking both of his hands tightly in hers. “I’m sorry.” She breathed, looking up into his face. “I’m sorry I never told you that, but it was one of his conditions. You could stay here and I could keep you with me if you believed that you were his and he could pass you off as another of his own sons…”

Lucien just stared at her. “…what?” he drew a breath as another thought occurred to him. “…who? Then, who is my father?”

“Helion.”

Lucien sat back, reeling. “Helion? The High Lord of Day?”

Ashk held more tightly to his hands, not letting him pull away. “Yes… I knew him when I was young… we…” she shook her head, “I loved him…”

“You had an affair with him?”

Tears fell from his mother’s eyes as she looked at him. “I loved him… and Beron was so angry when he found out. I thought he would kill you… but when you were born you looked like me, and enough like the others to pass as one of them. As one of his.”

Reaching forward, Lucien brushed the tears from his mother’s face. “Why are you telling me?”

“You’re safe now.” She breathed, her eyes wide. “You have the protection of the Night Court. Rhysand and his High Lady…”

Lucien just blinked, his mind racing. He barely noticed her lifting a hand to his cheek, her thumb tracing his right cheekbone. 

“I’m sorry, love.” She whispered, her eyes firmly on his own, “I love you so much…”

“I love you.” He murmured in response. She threw herself forward then, her arms going tightly around him and he breathed in her familiar chestnut scent. 

“You’re still my Little Lucien…” she murmured, finally sitting back on her heels and looking up at him again. He nodded, confusion beginning to swirl within him. “Say you forgive me…”

Lucien shifted forward, taking his mother’s hands again. “There’s nothing to forgive.” He knew she had done everything she could to protect him, no matter how much it had hurt or cost her to do so. The relief on her face was evident and she sniffed before getting to her feet. 

“Thank you.” She said, her fingertips brushing his cheek once more, “I should leave you. You have much to think about, I’m sure.”

Lucien didn’t move as his mother left the room, closing the door behind her. He just sat on the bed, his mind racing until he heard the bathroom door open slowly and he felt Elain emerge.

*

Pushing the door open slowly, Elain paused. Ashk was gone, and Lucien sat alone in the room. She swallowed thickly as she looked at him, sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to her as he appeared to stare, unmoving, at the wall. The moment Elain had sunk down into the bath, her vision had shifted. She had witnessed the entire conversation Lucien had had with his mother, watching through his eyes and feeling everything he had felt. Once she had shifted back to herself, she had gotten out of the bath and dressed hurriedly. She could feel him now, hurt and confusion battling within him and she moved slowly toward the bed.

Slowly, Elain climbed onto the bed and then crawled toward Lucien on the other side. She could hear his heart thundering wildly, and knew that it had nothing to do with her presence. When she reached him, she hesitated for only a moment before she wrapped her arms around him, pressing herself against his back. His only response was to draw a deep breath. 

“Lucien…” She murmured. 

“Beron isn’t my father…” his voice was soft and Elain nodded. 

“I know.” She breathed, pressing her lips gently to his shoulder. He turned his head toward her then, his eyes questioning. “You showed me…”

“Oh.” 

He looked back to the wall and Elain tightened her arms around him. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” She could feel all kinds of emotions roiling within him now, but knew that putting his thoughts into words would help. 

“I don’t know.” He murmured, “I don’t know what to think.”

“Are you glad you know?”

Lucien turned to face her, and Elain released him. His russet and gold eyes met hers and he nodded. “Yes.” His gaze fell, “I just… I’ve always been the seventh son of the High Lord of Autumn… only, I’m not…”

“You’re the seventh son of the Lady of the Autumn Court.” She replied, “You’ve always known that and it’s still true.”

He nodded, his hands twisting together. “It… it’s why he always hated me…” he looked at her again, “My whole life.” Elain lay a hand on his knee. “I am glad not to be his…” he leaned back then, running his hands over his face. “Ugh…” He flopped back against the bed, and Elain moved to lay beside him. “Eris knows, I’d put money on it.” He said, now staring at the ceiling.

“What makes you think that?” She asked, watching him carefully. 

“Nothing.” He murmured, “Everything…”

She wanted to touch him again but, before she could, Lucien turned onto his side, looking back at her. She could see half of his face now, his russet eye bright as it moved over her face. “Do you blame her for keeping it from you?”

“No.” he said softly, “And I’m glad that she has had some love in her life. She gets none from Beron.” Elain’s fingers found Lucien’s sleeve. Confusion slammed into her down the bond and she drew a deep breath. “I don’t know how to be Helion’s son.” He said. “I don’t know who that is…”

“You don’t have to be anyone other than who you are.” She told him, “You’re the same Lucien you were this morning, or yesterday.”

“And who is that?” he asked, “If not the son of Autumn?”

Elain pushed herself up on one elbow to look at him. “You’ve never been Beron’s son.” She said gently, “Even when you thought you were. You have never been like him, or your brothers.” Her eyes moved across his face, trying to read him as she spoke. “You’re kind. Even after everything that has been done to you. You’ve never become twisted. Do you know why that is?” he met her eyes with a questioning look, and Elain went on, “Because you are the product of love.” He blinked and she smiled, “That’s why you’re her favourite…”

She lay back down beside him and he was quiet for some time. “I can’t believe he got away with it for so long…”

“Who?”

“My fa- Beron.” He said. 

“Why didn’t she leave?” Elain asked, “Your mother… she loves someone else. Why didn’t she leave to be with him…?”

“It would have begun a war.” Lucien replied softly, “And she wouldn’t have been able to take us…”

“She could have taken you.”

“But not the others.” He looked at her, “It is that, I suspect, that she was apologising for. Not taking me and leaving…”

“What does Helion look like?” Elain asked, her eyes moving over Lucien slowly. He blinked. 

“Uh… he…” Lifting a hand, Lucien slowly brought his fingers up to Elain’s cheek, “Let me see if I…” the image of a startlingly handsome man filled Elain’s mind and she gasped. “Did you see?”

“Yes…” her eyes moved over his face again. “Your mother told me that your nose was your fathers…”

“I can’t believe nobody has noticed.” He muttered, “I can’t believe I never knew…”

“How could you know?” She shifted closer to him, her fingers moving over his arm again, “Have you secretly been hiding some fancy abilities inherited from your father?”

“No.” he laughed, but then frowned, and Elain raised an eyebrow at him. “I…” he glanced at her.

“What?”

“They call Helion the Spell-Cleaver.” He stared at her and Elain blinked, not following. “… when Hybern ordered you put into the Cauldron he bound Tamlin and I with some kind of spell…”

“Yes…” Elain remembered them struggling and unable to move. 

“When they tipped you out onto the floor… I broke that spell…”

Elain stared at him, remembering him wrapping his jacket around her and lifting her off the floor. Tamlin had still been bound behind him. “You… broke it…?”

“That’s Helion’s power…”

“How did you do that?”

“I don’t know…” he shook his head and Elain felt his warm fingers moving up her own arm, “Maybe it was just because I wanted to get to you so badly… it was instinctual.” 

Leaning forward until she could press her lips to his cheek, Elain smiled. “Thank you for that.” Lucien’s hand caught at the back of her neck, preventing her from pulling too far away. 

“Thank you.” He said, eyes meeting hers, “For listening to all of this…”

Unable to move away, Elain settled against him. “If anyone knows what it feels like not to know who and what you are anymore, it’s me…” She had sat for so very long after being made fae, trying to sort out everything going on in her mind, not understanding half of what she saw or who she was meant to be. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not very good at lying.”

“I am, actually.” Lucien replied, giving her a court-trained silky smile that didn’t reach his eyes, “Just not to you.”

Allowing herself to lean into him again, Elain rested her head against his shoulder. “I’m glad for that.”

“As am I.” his warm hand moved slowly across her back and she smiled.

“Is Helion nice?” Elain murmured, feeling exhaustion creeping up on her. 

“Yes, I suppose so.” Lucien’s voice was soft and comforting and she allowed her eyes to close. “I always liked him.”

“Good.” She breathed, giving a sleepy smile. “That’s good.”


	30. Chapter Thirty

**Chapter 30**

She was still curled up against him, her head on his chest, and Lucien was scared to move. When he had noticed that Elain had fallen asleep on him the previous night, he had been pleased. He hadn’t dared shift her, afraid of waking her, although he hadn’t been sure about if he should stay on the bed or not. In the end, he hadn’t had the strength to force himself to relinquish his position with Elain resting against him, and had instead sent a bolt of his power into the fireplace, ensuring the room would be warm enough for the rest of the night so they wouldn’t need the bedcovers that were currently trapped beneath them. He’d known he was being weak, but he didn’t care. Elain had willingly settled against him, trusting him enough to fall asleep on him, and he wasn’t giving that up. 

Turning his head to look at her, Lucien smiled. She had been right, he realised. If anyone knew what it was like to have their whole existence turned upside down, it was probably the mortal girl who had been made fae. He wasn’t naïve enough to think that his situation in any way compared to the trauma of her change, but he was glad to know that she wouldn’t just dismiss the inner turmoil that he was experiencing. He had thought about it all night, and he still didn’t know exactly what he thought or felt about the whole thing. His whole identity had centred around being a son of Autumn, and on having left that behind to find something else. Yet, that had never truly been who he was. He hadn’t left behind the court of his father, the court of his blood. He’d only ever been to the Day Court a handful of times as Tamlin’s emissary and, while he had liked it well enough, he had never considered it for a home.

When Elain tilted her head slightly, he felt her next breath across his neck and he shivered. He didn’t know how he had managed it, sleeping next to her all night while keeping his hands to himself. Perhaps, he supposed, it was because he didn’t have to let her go. He knew that he had her here with him, and that she wouldn’t be going anywhere. She was even still wearing the garnet necklace he had given her yesterday. Glancing down at it, a single thought went through his mind. _Mine._

His heartrate increased at the thought and Elain’s brown eyes opened and peered up at him. “Oh…” she murmured, pushing herself up on one elbow, and Lucien wrapped an arm around her so that she wouldn’t be able to get too far away. “Did we sleep like this all night…?”

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry…” she breathed, “I didn’t mean to…”

“I’m not complaining, Petal.” He grinned at her, but she shook her head. 

“I didn’t mean to tease you, or make it hard for you… but, thank you… for not…” Lucien lifted a hand to her cheek and she stopped. Her eyes widened as she looked back at him. “Did you sleep well?” she asked, and he nodded. “Do you feel okay?” he nodded again and she smiled after a moment. “If it was cruel, I’m sorry…”

“Stop…” he breathed, his hand still at her cheek, “It wasn’t cruel. I loved it.”

“Didn’t you want…”

“Of course I did.” He said, trying to read the look that moved through her eyes, “But, having you here, where I could touch you, worked just as well as that night in the kitchen. Focusing on that was enough.” She blinked, looking at him and if Lucien didn’t know better he would have thought she was disappointed. Did she want him to want her? If so, he’d show her that he did.

Sliding his hand from her cheek to the back of her neck, Lucien pulled Elain down as he lifted his head to kiss her. The way she melted into him almost immediately told him he had been correct and he slid his other arm around her, pulling her tighter against himself. The small squeak she made into his kiss had Lucien suddenly rolling them to pin Elain beneath his body. She gasped and he felt her arms wrap around his neck as he pushed to deepen the kiss, one hand brushing her golden brown hair back from her face. Moving gently against her, Lucien let out a soft groan, knowing that she could feel exactly how much he wanted her now.

When Elain’s hands tightened on his back, Lucien forced himself to stop. Dragging his lips from hers, he instead buried his face in her hair, stilling his movements, and simply drawing one slow breath after another. Her hold on him loosened and, after a few moments, he pushed himself up and off of her. He could feel her eyes following him, but he didn’t dare meet her gaze until he was standing beside the bed, far enough away that he couldn’t touch her. The heat behind those dark eyes surprised him and, when he drew a breath, he could smell her arousal. 

“Uh…” he stiffened, turning away and staggering over to the orange couch, sinking down on it and trying to force himself to calm down.

“Sorry…” Elain said softly and Lucien shook his head. 

“No, that was my fault…” he replied, gripping the seat of the couch tightly in his hands.

“I wanted you to kiss me.” He met her dark eyes again and nodded.

“I know.” He gave her a small smile. “I guess I was kind of at the end of my self-control.” And it was going to be so much harder to keep himself leashed if she had decided that she wanted him kissing her now. He definitely wanted to give her that. He wanted to give her more than that, but he would not. He knew that she wasn’t there, not yet. And, until she told him otherwise, he would keep himself in check.

As Elain got off the bed, he watched her. He could still smell her and as he drew another breath her eyes flicked his way. The look that crossed her face told him that she knew exactly what had just about doubled his heartrate and she bit her lip, meeting his eyes. “I…” she broke off and he just watched her, not having anything to say in response. After a moment, she straightened and lifted her chin before turning and heading into the bathroom, closing the door after herself. Lucien released a relieved sigh, running his hands over his face. If she had have stood there any longer, he might have struggled to keep himself on the couch. It was one thing for him to tell himself that she didn’t want him and force himself to ignore his own desires, it was quite another to try and maintain that control while her body was saying that she did want him. 

With the bathroom door closed, Lucien decided it was safe enough for him to get off the couch and he got to his feet. Moving to his pack, he rifled through it, looking for something to change into once he had bathed himself. He tried to keep his mind off what his mother had told him last night, but found he was unable to do so. She had told him because she thought that he was safe, but was she? What would happen if Beron found out that she had told him? Would she be punished? He didn’t know, and decided that it was probably better if he acted as if he did not know. 

When Elain came out of the bathroom, smelling of the floral soap from the sink, he gave her another small smile before heading into the bathroom himself. It was still early enough that they wouldn’t be late for breakfast, and he desperately needed a relaxing soak in the bath and to relieve himself of his pants which had become uncomfortably tight. It was fine. They had time.


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

**Chapter 31**

After breakfast, Elain watched Lucien disappear down the hallway. Beron had summoned him, and he didn’t have much of a choice about answering the call. He had dropped her at their room, telling her that he would hopefully not be long, and she wondered what kind of torment the High Lord was going to put him through. She wondered if Beron had found out that Ashk had told Lucien about Helion. Was that why he had been summoned? She didn’t know about that, but she did know that she and Lucien needed to get out of here as soon as possible.

Glancing at the door to their room, she rested a hand against it for a moment. She could go inside and wait for Lucien to return, that was what he had wanted her to do, but she needed to finish collecting things for her book. They couldn’t leave the Autumn Court until she was done and, if they wanted to get out of here faster, that what she needed to do.

Biting her lip, Elain weighed the options. She wasn’t stupid enough to go wandering around on her own, but she didn’t want to sit and waste time. Ashk had said during breakfast that she had planned to spend some time out in her favourite garden so, Elain figured, she would head that way. If she could get to Ashk before anyone else found her, she would be safe. Besides, it wasn’t as if she was going to be floating around the place unaware. 

Checking that the small book was still in her pocket, Elain stepped away from the door and turned, heading up the hallway swiftly. She would get this done quickly, then she and Lucien might be able to leave as soon as tomorrow. They were meant to head to the Winter Court next but, as far as she knew, they had not received word that they were to be expected. Either way, the sooner she got her job done, the sooner they would be able to leave when they were able. 

Turning down the next left turn in the corridor, Elain lengthened her stride. Perhaps she could even get this done and get back to the room before Lucien returned. She smiled at that thought. Some more time alone and uninterrupted with him where they could possibly discuss what had happened earlier sounded like a good idea to her. She had wanted him to kiss her, even before thinking very much about it. She had awoken warm and comfortable, with one of his arms around her, and she had been pleased when he had evidently read that desire in her and acted accordingly. She remembered the flush of heat that had washed through her when Lucien had rolled atop her, his warm weight pinning her in place, and a shiver passed through her at the memory of his gentle movement against her. 

Elain was shaken from her thoughts when Eris stepped out into the hallway ahead of her. He paused when he spotted her and then began heading her way, his stride smooth and even. Elain came to a stop, knowing that she had nowhere to go. Eris smiled at her when he came to stand before her. “Are you okay?” he asked, and Elain nodded. He ran a hand down his crimson jacket, and she watched his amber eyes move over her. “Have you collected all you need for your compilation?” 

“Ah, no.” Elain shook her head, pulling the book from her pocket. “I was hoping to add more just now.”

“May I see?” he held his hand out and, hesitantly, Elain handed him her book. She watched as he flipped through it, until he got to the Autumn Court section. An instant later he closed the book and handed it back to her. “If you would allow it, I’d like to show you something you might like to include.”

“A flower?” she asked, and Eris nodded, offering her his arm. Not seeing a way she could decline, Elain placed her hand on his arm and allowed him to lead her down the hallway. 

Eris walked at a steady pace, and Elain remained silent as he began telling her about different aspects of the court. Before long he had taken her into a courtyard she had not seen before and they came to a stop before a delightfully colourful garden bed. “This is my favourite.” He said, lowering his arm. 

Elain stared at the flowers. “Oh…” she murmured, her eyes trying to drink in everything she saw. Tugging her book from her pocket again, she tried to work out where to begin. “Which…” she murmured, “which did you have in mind…?”

“Well, I figured you’d like both these…” he bent to trace a finger along the petals of a peach coloured dahlia, “and these…” he indicated a small yellow and purple crocus plant. Elain just nodded, her hands turning the pages of her book to the next blank space. 

“I could use both…”

“You are welcome to do so.”

Sinking down to her knees, Elain set about trying to draw the dahlias. After a moment, she remembered herself and looked back up over her shoulder at Eris who was watching her. “Don’t mind me.” He said, “I’ll wait.”

Nodding, Elain turned back to the garden, her pencil already moving against paper. The dahlia was easy enough to get the basic shape right, and she had moved on to the crocus flowers when a voice called out to Eris across the courtyard.

“Excuse me for a few moments.” Eris said, “There is something important I must address…”

Elain didn’t even turn around as he strode away, just nodded, engrossed in what she was doing. She heard the door they had come out of earlier close as he followed someone inside, and then her attention was focused entirely on trying to capture the shape of the crocus plant’s leaves.

She was completely unprepared when a pair of hands seized her by the shoulders and hauled her to her feet. Gasping, Elain struggled to get free as she was turned around. Lucien’s other brothers grinned at her.

“Well,” the one she had told to stop touching her at breakfast sneered, “I’ve been looking for you.” Elain stared at him. He was taller than the other two and his hair shorter. He snatched the book from her hands and flicked through it, feigning interest, before snapping it shut with a sigh. “How quaint.” A glance at his brothers had the two of them moving to grab Elain again, each of them holding her upper arms so she couldn’t move. The taller one stepped closer, slipping the book into her dress pocket as he met her eyes. 

“What do you want?” she asked, trying to keep her voice steady. She tried to pull away from the other two but got nowhere. 

“You said it was rude to touch somebody you don’t know.” His voice was scarily quiet and she could feel the heat of him as he pushed closer. One of the other brothers snickered, “So, I thought we could get to know one another better because I do plan on touching you…”

Elain shook her head, struggling again. “No…”

“Hm… Yes…” he said, a hand moving to her dress. “Afterall, don’t you know… brothers share…”

Elain shrieked when he thrust a hand between her legs, groping at her.

“Anything that has been Lucien’s has always been ours…” He went on, the grin on his face utterly vulpine. Elain continued to struggle and the grip the other two had on her arms only tightened. 

“Ow…” she tried kicking at him, but he only laughed. 

“My name’s Malak.” He told her, his face close, “I’m telling you that now so that you know what name to scream before I’m done with you.”

Disgust coiled through Elain before the other two brothers lifted her off her feet and Malak pressed closer, lifting her dress and seizing her hips as he pushed himself between her legs. “Let me go.” Elain growled. What was he planning to do? Force himself on her while his two brothers held her in place?

“I don’t think so.” Malak replied coldly, forcing her legs around his waist. 

Elain screamed, the sound only cut off when Malak clamped a hand over her mouth, his amber eyes flaring with anger. She continued to struggle and writhe, but the grip the other two brothers had on her was iron and she knew she would have bruising on her arms by the end of the day. Tears of both fear and anger welled in her eyes when she felt Malak begin fumbling with his pants. This was not happening. 

Redoubling her efforts, Elain thrashed, managing to rake her fingernails down Malak’s arm. This only resulted in a sharp slap to her face. “Keep still, you little whore.” Rage flowed through Elain at being called such a thing, and she scratched at him again before the other two yanked both her arms behind her back. “We know the kind of trash Lucien fucks with.” Malak told her, “This is practically an honour for you.”

“Can’t wait to see his face when he finds out we’ve all had a go on his Mate.” One of the others put in, and Elain could hear the smirk in his voice.

“No!” she shrieked, her back arching as she thrashed again.

Suddenly, Malak was yanked backward away from her, and Elain’s feet hit the ground as the other two loosened their hold on her. Elain wiped at her eyes, blinking. Eris stood before her, holding Malak by the throat and looking livid. She heard the other two faeries behind her backing away slowly and when she thought she saw flames dancing in Eris’ amber eyes, she understood their fear. The eldest brother turned those burning eyes on her then. 

“Run to Lucien.” He told her calmly. 

She didn’t need to be told again. Elain launched herself across the courtyard and for the door nearby. As she hauled it open, flames erupted across the courtyard out of the corner of her eye and she couldn’t contain a whimper of fear.

Running as quickly as she could down the various hallways, Elain had only just begun to wonder where she was going as she didn’t know where Lucien was and she didn’t think going back to their room was the most discreet location for her to try and hide in. The thought had barely crossed her mind when she saw him. 

Hurrying toward him, Elain saw the moment Lucien got a look at her face. He paused for a second, his smile disappearing, before striding up the hallway in her direction. When he was close enough, Elain threw herself at him with a sob. Lucien’s strong arms wrapped around her and he held her tightly. Elain squeezed her eyes shut as she clung to him.

“Elain, Petal,” he murmured, “What happened? What’s wrong?” She could hear his heart beating erratically as he tried to suppress panic and she shook her head, pressing her face into his shoulder. “Elain?”

“No.” she breathed, clenching a handful of his jacket in her hand. One of his large hands began rubbing circles into her back and a moment later she felt him press a soft kiss to her forehead.

“It’s okay.” He told her, “Whatever it was, I’ve got you…”

Nodding, Elain just held tightly to him. With the warmth of Lucien pressed against her, and his arms wrapped protectively around her she could feel herself beginning to calm down. He made her feel safe.


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

**Chapter 32**

When screams had begun to echo up the hallways, Lucien had taken Elain’s hand and hurried back to their room. He did not know what was going on, but it clearly wasn’t good.

“Tell me what happened.” He said, closing the door and turning to Elain. Just looking at her set something in him on edge. He could easily see that something had occurred. Her face was red and blotchy, and he could see that she had been crying. The longer he looked at her, the more he saw. Moving closer he inspected her face, a snarl ripping from him when he saw a faint bruise coming up along her cheekbone. “….Elain…”

“I…” she shook her head, “I don’t want to say…”

“Then show me.” He replied, bending to slip an arm around her waist. She leaned into him and he carefully rubbed her back, closing his eyes and reaching for the bond. Finding it, he tentatively tugged at it, feeling her shift in response. 

“I don’t know how.”

“Just try.” he murmured. “It’s instinctual. It’s there… just… feel it.” He stiffened then when he felt Elain tug back on the bond. Her hand slid up his chest to come to rest at the side of his neck and then he drew a sharp breath as the image of a courtyard flashed before his eyes. 

Lucien found himself snarling and pacing back and forth across the room while Elain watched him with wide eyes. “Stop…” she breathed and he wanted to, but he was so so angry.

“I’m going to kill every last one of them!”

“Stop, please…” She moved in front of him, pushing him to a stop with both hands against his chest. He was surprised at her strength, and he looked down at her, his anger vanishing at the pleading look in her brown eyes.

“I’m sorry.” His eyes moved over her, the metallic eye clicking and whirring as it took in every detail of her rumpled dress and bruised skin. Gently, Lucien ghosted his fingertips over the hand shaped bruises of her upper arms. “I’m so sorry…”

“It’s not your fault.”

“I knew it.” He breathed, his hands coming up to cup her face. “I knew bringing you here was a mistake. I knew they’d try…” he broke off when Elain pressed a finger to his lips.

“Calm down.” She said softly, “I can hear your heart… You’ll pass out or something…”

Lucien let out a bark of a laugh, then shook his head as the laughter died. “I shouldn’t have left you alone…”

“Stop.” She wrapped her arms around his neck, and Lucien bent to wind his own around her waist. “I’m okay.” She told him and he nodded, straightening up and bringing her with him as he held her tightly against himself. “I need you to be calm.” Her breath was hot against his ear, and Lucien nodded again. She was right. She was fine, he could feel her heart against his own chest and he forced himself to draw a slow deep breath, enjoying her sweet floral scent with just a hint of apple. 

“Alright.” He murmured. “Alright.” He knew that Eris had stopped the others before things had gone any further, but the instinct in him to find them and kill them still flared within him. But, right here and now, Elain needed him to be calm. So, he would be. “Whatever you need, Petal.”

Her hands slid up into his hair and Lucien’s eyes closed. “Calm your heartbeat down, so I can calm down.” She murmured and he nodded, trying to focus on getting his breathing under control so that his heart could slow. “Thank you.” She breathed after a few moments, letting out a soft sigh.

Lucien opened his eyes when she leaned back enough for him to see her face. He tried not to focus on the bruise which appeared darker than it had only minutes before. “I will never allow that to happen again.” He promised and Elain leaned forward enough to press her lips lightly to his. 

“You didn’t allow it to happen at all.” She murmured.

They both jumped when someone pounded on the door. Lucien lowered Elain gently back to the floor, and pushed her behind himself, “Go to the bathroom,” he said softly, “It locks from the inside…”

“Lucien…”

“From the window, there’s only a small drop to the balcony below.”

“Lucien…” her hands tugged at his jacket and he turned, pointing to the bathroom door.

“Please.”

She sighed and moved toward the bathroom door. He watched her for a moment before moving back to the other door and opening it quickly. When Ashk pushed inside he almost sagged with relief. Elain came back out of the bathroom, and Lucien had been about to ask his mother what she was doing when he noticed the screaming in the distance. Going cold, he turned to look at his mother. 

“You need to take Elain and go.”

“Is it happening?” he asked, already moving toward Elain who had just gone rigid, her head tilted and an odd look on her face. Her dark eyes focused on him a moment later. 

“Eris has had things in place for months.” Ashk was saying, “Now Malak is challenging him. He’s got those loyal to him seeking out anyone loyal to Eris…” Lucien watched as his mother moved around the room, picking up things she had obviously deemed belonged to him and putting them in his pack by the wall. “You need to go. You’re not safe here.” 

“There’s fighting everywhere.” Elain murmured, and Lucien glanced at her. “In the hallways… outside… Blood…”

“Eris will win, though.” Lucien looked back to his mother for confirmation. Upon seeing her look unconvinced, his mind began to race.

“But…” Elain said softly, “Beron is still High Lord… He’s not dead.”

“Doesn’t matter.” Lucien told her, “By the end of today, he will be.”

More pounding on the door startled all three of them, and Lucien strode toward it, indicating the bathroom once more and waiting as Elain took his mother’s arm, pulling her toward the bathroom door. He grabbed a small blade from his pack and went back to the door, pulling it open, dagger ready when he came face to face with Eris.

Before Lucien could do or say anything Eris had met his eyes. “You need to take your Mate, and leave.” Blinking, Lucien just stared at him. Eris snarled, and pushed into the room. “Did you hear me, Lucien?”

“Yes…” Lucien turned as Ashk and Elain moved back into the room. Eris strode toward their mother. 

“What are you doing in here?”

“Telling them to go.” Ashk replied. Eris nodded and turned back to Lucien who just watched them. 

“Why are you telling us?” Lucien directed his words at Eris who rolled his eyes.

“Do you want to die?” his brother asked, “Do you want her to die?” he jerked his head at Elain. “Because they will come for you, and they won’t spare either of you.”

“And you would?” Lucien asked, his blade still in his hand.

“You’re not a part of this.” Ashk said, buckling his pack up on the bed. “I told you the truth so you would know. This isn’t your fight.”

“You’re not a threat to me.” Eris added, and Lucien eyed him. He’d been right. Eris did know that Beron wasn’t his father.

He staggered when his mother thrust his pack into his arms and his sword into his hands. “You need to go now. If they see you, they will kill you.”

“…come with us.” Lucien took his mother’s arm, his eyes meeting hers. “You don’t have to stay here…” She looked up at him, her hand coming gently to his cheek before she shook her head. 

“Part of you belongs here,” she told him, “My blood… inside you… will always belong here. But, part of you does not. You can make a home where you choose.” She smiled at him, “But every part of me is Autumn, and this is where I belong.” Lucien wanted to convince her otherwise, but she pushed him toward the door. “Go… take Elain and go, while you can.” Elain was suddenly beside him, her own pack slung across her back.

“Take the Dark Road,” Eris’ voice said when Lucien took hold of the door handle, and he looked back over his shoulder at his brother. “They wont just kill you if they happen across you. They’ll actively be looking for you.” Lucien nodded, his eyes moving over Eris before flicking to his mother again. 

“Go, Love.” She said, “Be careful.”

Fear squeezed at Lucien’s heart. What if something happened to her and he never saw her again? Elain took his hand then and he glanced at her. He couldn’t focus on anything else right now. He needed to get Elain out of here and somewhere safe. That was his top priority. “Thank you.” He murmured over his shoulder before he slipped out into the hallway, Elain on his heels. 

The screaming was louder out here, and seemed to be coming from every direction. He felt Elain shudder and he turned to look at her, pressing the small blade into one of her hands. “Stay behind me.” He told her, “Stay close.” She nodded, her eyes wide. Taking her other hand in his free one, he led her slowly down the hallway, pausing to listen before rounding the corner at the end.

Lucien knew a dozen quick and easy routes out of The Forest House, having spent many years sneaking out when he wasn’t meant to. It was different, however, when it seemed that every corridor he wanted to use had some form of fight happening in it. Elain had groaned in horror the first time they had been forced to step over a dead faerie, skirting the blood that was pooling around the body only to press themselves flat against the wall as a new scuffle had passed them by. Lucien hadn’t realised that Malak would have been able to put together so many who would support his bid for the throne. He knew that Eris would have a strong following, as his eldest brother had practically been running things behind the scenes for decades. He had expected Eris’ coup to go smoothly and without much bloodshed. Malak, it seemed, had grown tired of Eris’ control. Lucien had no doubt that if Malak came out of this as High Lord, the bloodshed today would only be the beginning.

When Elain tugged at his arm hard enough to half turn him around, Lucien raised an eyebrow at her. “Not that way.” She breathed, refusing to let him go.

“Why not?” He asked, “There’s a door just beyond…” They would be outside in a matter of moments.

“No…”

Before he could ask anything further, Elain had pushed him up against the wall, tucking herself against him and gone still. A moment later a shadow passed the nearby window and he heard Malak give an order for the road to be searched. “Eris said take the Dark Road.” Lucien murmured, and Elain looked up at him. “That will take us back to Spring.”

“Not the road they’re searching?”

“It goes to Spring, too…”

“But they won’t search the other?”

“Not likely.”

Lucien hesitated for a moment, not loving the idea of trusting something Eris had told them to do. It seemed right, though. Nobody used the Dark Road, and he doubted that Malak would want to waste men he could be using elsewhere to search it. He thought for a moment about not going back to Spring at all. The other option was the Winter Court. They were meant to head there next anyway. That journey was far more difficult, however. He’d done it with Feyre, but he wouldn’t put Elain through that. It had to be Spring, and they would take the Dark Road.

Elain jumped when a scream rang out somewhere nearby, high pitched and painful, and Lucien took one of her hands tightly in his again. “It’s going to be fine.” He told her softly, “I’m going to get you out of here. Back to your sisters.” She nodded, her eyes wide and her face pale. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes.” Her quiet murmured response pushed Lucien into action again and he began heading for a nearby corridor. If he could get up two flights of stairs and down another on the other side of the house, then they would come out close to the path that would take them to the Dark Road. 

Listening to everything going on around them, and making sure that he kept an ear out for Elain’s footsteps following him, Lucien led them as quietly as possible through his old home. His every sense was heightened and every reaction simmered just below the surface, itching beneath his skin. He heard every breath Elain took, heard the way her breath hitched whenever they heard something going on nearby, and that pushed him on. Everything in him was screaming _Protect! Protect! Protect!_


	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

**Chapter 33**

Clenching her teeth as the screaming continued to echo up and down every hallway they came across, Elain followed close behind Lucien as he led them through the house. She had counted thirteen dead faeries so far, trying not to look at the faces of each one as she had stepped over or around their prone and bloody bodies. She could hear Lucien’s steady heartbeat, could feel his focused determination as he took in seemingly every detail and moved carefully ahead of her. Aside from the dead bodies, they hadn’t seen anyone alive since they had passed Malak earlier, and Elain couldn’t decide if that was a good or bad thing.

As Lucien took her hand to lead her down a flight of stairs, she wondered where Ashk was and if she was safe. Surely none of her sons would want her to come to any harm, no matter which of them became High Lord. She wanted to ask Lucien if he thought so, but when they reached the lower floor and Elain opened her mouth, she choked on the thick tang of blood in the air. Hearing her, Lucien turned his head and she saw the understanding in his eyes. “Hold your breath.” He murmured, “We’ll be outside soon.” Doing as he said, Elain held her breath, wincing at the tacky sensation of walking across the blood slicked floor. She didn’t want to know how many had been killed in here, or where they were. 

“…are they going to kill everyone?” She breathed and Lucien glanced back at her again. 

“No.” he replied, “But, enough.”

“How many is enough?”

He pushed open a door, letting in a draft of delightfully cool and fresh air as he stepped outside. “Until they stop fighting back.” Elain followed him outside, drawing a deep breath of the sweet air. Lucien headed for the trees to their right, and she hurried to keep up with him. “This way.”

She had the vague sense that they were being watched a moment before a blur flew past her and crashed into Lucien, taking them both into the trees. Elain gasped and followed through the branches obscuring her view, coming up short when she recognised one of Lucien’s brothers currently pinning him to the damp forest floor. As she watched, Lucien snarled and somehow managed to throw his brother off of himself and roll to his feet in one fluid movement. 

Spinning, Elain looked back the way they had come, wondering if anyone else had seen and would be coming to follow them. When she saw nothing, she turned back to see Lucien throw himself at his brother, sword back in his hand. The two of them moved so quickly Elain could barely keep up. She could do nothing but watch, her breath caught in her throat, as they traded powerful blows, swords glinting in the fading golden light. It was a rush of reds and oranges and golds as they moved back and forth, Lucien’s heart beating quickly above all of it, and Elain had never felt as useless as she did in that moment.

When Lucien gave a pained gasp, his brother laughed. “What’s the matter, Little Lucien?” he sneered. “You seem a bit out of practice. Haven’t you had anyone to keep you on your toes?”

“Nobody has tried to murder me in my sleep for a while, no.” Lucien replied, his hand pressed to his ribs, and Elain’s heart stuttered at the sight of his dark blood seeping between his fingers. 

“Shame.” The other smirked, “Apparently it was good for you.”

Elain moved forward, unable to take her eyes off of Lucien, stopping only when he held a hand out to her. “Stay there.” He breathed, straightening when he noticed his brother’s gaze shift her way. 

She met those cold amber eyes with a shudder, remembering the way he’d held tightly to her arm earlier so that Malak could do whatever he’d liked to her. “I wonder,” he said, directing his words back at Lucien, “Would you fight better with a little extra motivation?” 

Elain held her breath as Lucien moved in front of her, blocking his brother’s view of her. “Watch yourself.” He warned, venom just about dripping from his words.

His brother laughed again, “I’d prefer you to watch,” he told Lucien, “And after I fuck you up, I think I’ll fuck her while you lay there and watch as you bleed to death.”

The rage that exploded from Lucien forced Elain back a step. She was glad she had moved a moment later when they collided once again, swords flashing as Lucien was pushed back, forced to give ground. Elain wasn’t confident with the way this fight would go. Lucien’s brother was bigger than he was, and was clearly the more skilled with a sword. She knew that Lucien was never going to stop however, and that scared her.

It wasn’t long before the older brother found an opening and had landed a powerful blow to Lucien’s wounded side. Elain flinched at the pained sound Lucien made, and then watched with horror as he was thrown to the ground, his brother coming down on top of him, pinning him to the fallen leaves and dirt. She watched him struggle for a moment before his eyes met hers, russet and gold, glinting in the light. “… run.” He told her, “Elain, run…”

Elain backed away, panic rising in her, mixing with the panic she could feel from Lucien through the bond. “No…”

Lucien’s brother laughed, keeping Lucien pinned beneath him as he turned to look at Elain. The amusement she saw in his amber eyes made her feel sick and she didn’t know what to do. “How sweet.” He said, his tone mocking, “She won’t run away and leave you.” He looked back down at Lucien who was still struggling and straining to free himself. 

Tears welled in Elain’s eyes as she felt the self-disgust coming from Lucien along with a flash of Jesminda’s pleading face as he had struggled to get to her and had been unable to save her. “Elain…” he pleaded, “Go…”

“Naw…” His brother grinned, looking back down at Lucien, “She’s not listening…”

“Elain…”

“She won’t outrun me anyway. I’m going to have a nice hot ride between her thighs…”

A mix of rage and panic hit Elain down the bond as flames erupted from Lucien’s hands, wrapping around his brother who gave a grunt of surprise.

Elain gasped when Lucien screamed in pain as his brother’s fingers pressed into his wound and then she had moved without thinking, throwing herself on his brother’s back. Before his brother could try and push her away she had driven the blade she was holding into his broad back, holding on desperately as he reared up, trying to get it out. Blood ran across her hands and up her arms as he lifted himself off of Lucien and Elain moved with him, trying to prevent him pulling the blade out. When he jerked sharply Elain looked down to see that Lucien had pulled another blade from his belt and thrust it into his brother’s stomach. 

As his brother fell to the side, groaning, Lucien scrambled out from under him, getting to his feet and pulling Elain away. “Come on…” he breathed, his hand tightening on hers, “Come on… we have to get far enough away from the house so we can winnow.”

“Is he …?” Elain hurried after Lucien. 

“Probably not.” Lucien replied, his voice strained, “But I don’t want anyone else coming after us when they find him.”

“Are you okay?” she asked him, “You’re bleeding a lot…”

“I’ll be better once we get out of here.”

Elain bit her lip, letting Lucien pull her through the trees along a path he seemed to know well, but which she could barely distinguish from the rest of the forest as the light faded and the shadows lengthened around them. Darkness had barely fallen when he gave a sigh. “Here.” She had just glanced around for what he had been looking for when he had swung around, wrapped his arms around her and winnowed the both of them.

She could feel the exhaustion in Lucien after the third time he’d winnowed them, but by now Tamlin’s Manor was in sight and she felt him stagger. “We’re nearly there.” She told him, sliding an arm around his waist, worry coursing through her at the feel of his blood soaked jacket. “Come on…” she whispered, “You can heal yourself now…”

“I’m okay.” He murmured and Elain shook her head, pulling him toward the steps up into the house. 

Tamlin met them at the door, his green eyes going wide at the sight of them, and Elain realised they must look pretty horrific both covered in blood as they were. “By the Cauldron…” 

“Help.” Elain murmured, and Tamlin moved to assist her in getting Lucien inside. 

“What happened?” The High Lord asked and Lucien shook his head.

“My brothers had a disagreement.”

“…with who?”

“Everyone.” He muttered. “… no doubt by morning we will hear which one of them is the new High Lord of Autumn.”

Elain watched various thoughts flicker across Tamlin’s face before he nodded silently. “If you would like to rest here the night, I will let Rhysand know you will return tomorrow.”

“Thanks.” Lucien murmured, standing straighter after a moment. “I… I’d really like to get into a bath…”

Tamlin nodded and then turned and strode away. Elain turned incredulous eyes on Lucien. “Is that it?”

“He’ll send the message.” Lucien told her, “We get to go clean up.” Looking him over, Elain raised an eyebrow and he gave her a lazy smile. “I’ve had worse, Petal. I’ll have it all sorted out in ten minutes and a hot soak.”

Reassurance reached her down the bond and she felt herself relax a little. “Alright.” She agreed, following him up the stairs.

By the time she got to the room she had stayed in earlier, Elain found a hot bath already waiting for her and, as she peeled off her blood stained dress, she was more than keen to sink into it and forget everything that had happened since breakfast. As she scrubbed the blood from her arms, and hands, making sure to get it out from under her fingernails, she felt herself begin to draw deeper, more relaxed breaths. She wondered if she’d drawn a full breath since Lucien’s brothers had grabbed hold of her in that courtyard.

She was well and truly relaxed by the time she climbed out of the bath, and pulled one of her night dresses over her head. Shuffling back into the bedroom, Elain was already longing for the soft feel of the pillows she could collapse down upon. However, after barely a glance at her bed, Elain had turned away. How could she sleep knowing that any of Lucien’s brothers could have followed them here? It wasn’t exactly a secret they were coming back to the Spring Court. Were they even safe here?

Casting one more glance at the bed, Elain turned and strode for the door and across the hallway to Lucien’s room.


	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

**Chapter 34**

His gaze sliding to the door, Lucien listened. He’d heard Elain’s door open across the hallway and, as he strained his ears, he heard soft footfalls approach his own door. Sitting up suddenly, he threw the light sheet back from his body and dove for some loose pants sitting on a nearby chair. He’d just gotten them on, tugging them up into place, when he heard the gentle knock. Hurrying to open the door, wondering what was wrong, he struggled to do his pants up. “Elain?” he asked as her eyes swept over him as the door creaked open. “Are you alright?”

“I…ah… yes.” Her eyes caught on his hands, and Lucien turned away as he finished what he was doing. Still able to feel her eyes on his back, he drew a deep breath before turning back to her. She had moved into the room and closed the door behind her and he could see her now, just looking at him. “I… wanted to see if you were able to heal your wound…” those brown eyes moved across his chest and down his ribs. He absently touched where his brother had been able to slice him open. Nothing but smooth skin now. 

“I was.” He replied. “Like I said, I’ve had worse.” Her eyes lifted to his face, his eye, his scar, and he turned away again, sending a brief thought to the fireplace before it grew little brighter, sending more warmth into the room. “You see?” he asked, “Good as new. Well, apart from the obvious.”

Watching her, and able to feel her hesitation, Lucien tilted his head. “Are… you sure they wont follow us?” her voice was soft and Lucien nodded, trying his best to sound reassuring. 

“Yes.” He said, “For one, they’re scared of Tamlin.” He gave her a grin, “And two, they have enough mess to deal with without adding another war to their pile of troubles. If Eris is High Lord, he has no reason to chase us, and if Malak is, then he will be having enough of a battle getting things under his own control to worry about us.”

Elain nodded, taking his words in, and Lucien realised she had come to him wanting to feel safe.

“Okay.” She murmured and he saw her dark eyes flick to the bedroom door before looking back to him as he felt himself begin to respond to having her here in his space. 

“Do you…want to stay?” he asked gently. 

She looked at him steadily then, silent for a few moments, and he could practically see her weighing her options.

“I don’t want sex.” she said.

Lucien practically choked. “Oh, Petal. I didn’t think you did.” He lifted a hand to his hair. “I can sleep on the couch if you prefer.” Elain shook her head, and Lucien shifted slightly. This was different to last night. Last night they had slept atop the bed, and he had been wearing his regular day clothing. This would not be like that. 

“I… can sleep over on the far side… if that would help…” she began, but this time Lucien shook his head. 

“It would not.” That would feel like torture. He knew that he would be unable to resist touching her, that if she was to be in his bed, he would need to be able to hold her.

Turning, he bent to pick up a shirt and lifted it to pull over his head. “Do you… usually sleep… without clothing?” Elain’s voice was barely more than a whisper.

Lucien threw her a grin. “Well, usually there’s nobody to see me and complain.”

Her brown eyes moved over him. “I don’t imagine you’ve heard many complaints.” She muttered, and Lucien just about died.

Once he’d pulled his shirt on, he moved back to his bed and shifted back to where he had been laying before. Elain was watching him from where she still stood by the door, and Lucien gave her an encouraging smile. He didn’t know what to say to her that wouldn’t sound like a command to join him, and he wouldn’t do that. Instead, he shifted further over, leaving the space for her clear and inviting and, after a moment, she crossed the room to him.

“Lucky you.” He said softly, “You get the bit I already warmed up.” Elain met his eyes with a quick glance before she silently slid into the bed to join him. Not wanting to get anything confused or cross any lines, Lucien figured he would just ask. “Am I allowed to touch you?”

“Yes.”

He moved slightly closer, propping himself on a pillow and couldn’t contain a wide smile when she slid closer and settled against him, her head resting against his shoulder. Wrapping his arm around her, Lucien hoped that she wasn’t paying attention to the way that his heartbeat had increased. Was this what she had wanted when she had decided to cross the hallway to his room? He sure hoped so. 

“…I thought you were going to die.” Elain’s hand came to rest on his chest and Lucien looked down at her. 

“I would have.” He told her, “If you hadn’t have done what you did.” He paused when she frowned, “He would have killed us both.”

“Yes.” She murmured

“…why didn’t you run when I told you to?” Lucien watched her face carefully. “Why didn’t you leave me?”

“How could I?” she asked, shifting closer until she was pressed against his side, “And what good would it have done? You would have been dead, and he would have caught me anyway.” Her eyes lifted to meet his gaze, “And I would have rather been dead.”

Lifting his other hand, Lucien brought it to Elain’s cheek. “I’m sorry.” He murmured, “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop him. I’m constantly wanting to keep you near me, keep you with me, so that I can protect you… but I couldn’t.” Shame and guilt washed through him. “I couldn’t do a thing.”

He froze when Elain met his eyes again. “You wouldn’t have let him touch me.” She said, “I know that. I can feel it in my core.” Her voice softened, “Your fire… you’d only just begun to use it when I jumped on him. You weren’t done, Lucien. You were not yet beaten.”

Swallowing thickly, Lucien sought for something to say in reply. “I appreciate your faith in me.” He murmured, “but maybe you overestimate my abilities.”

“Maybe you underestimate them.”

He shook his head, not sure about that. It had been proven time and time again that he was never enough when it mattered. 

The thought had barely crossed his mind when Elain’s hand tightened around a handful of his shirt and she turned to press her forehead against his neck. Her warm breath ghosted over his skin before he heard her whisper softly. “I trust you.”

“Horrible choice, really.” He replied, although her words had set his blood racing.

“Lucien…” He knew she was frowning without having to see her face.

“I know. I’m sorry.” he rubbed a hand over her back, “I won’t fail you again. I’ll be better…” he would be. What had nearly happened today was unacceptable, and he would never allow himself to be forced into that position again. He would not be helpless. Not when Elain was at risk. 

She lifted her head, resting her weight on an elbow, to meet his eyes again. She was frowning, he’d been right. “You’re enough.” Her words were simple and plain, and Lucien had kissed her before he’d even realised what he was doing. 

She leaned into him, allowing him to pull her more tightly against himself, and Lucien pressed on. Trying to convey everything that had been building up inside him since that morning, he kissed her slowly and carefully. He kissed her for her kindness, her gentle heart, for his fear that he wouldn’t have been able to protect her, and for her belief that he would have. He kissed her for her trust in him, and for what had happened in that courtyard with Malak, for the way she had clung to him when she had found him afterwards, and the way she had followed him without question as they had tried to escape the house. He kissed her for coming to him now, and as a promise that he would be whatever she needed, whenever she needed it. 

Feeling a slight tremble in her, Lucien lifted his head, trailing his fingers along her jaw. When she looked at him with lust burning behind her dark eyes, fire stirred within him and he went to kiss her again. Elain drew a shuddery breath and he felt her fingers in his hair before her words echoed in his mind. _“I don’t want sex._ ” Pausing, Lucien pressed his lips to her cheek instead. 

“Sorry…” he murmured, “I’ll rein it in…” He listened to her breaths, coming heavier than usual, as he settled down on the pillow beside her, his nose practically touching hers, his fingers moving across her jaw again before trailing up her cheek to push her hair back from her face. “Here…” he watched as the bruise across her cheekbone, from where Malak had struck her, slowly vanished before he turned his attention to the hand shaped bruises on her arms.

“You don’t need to do that.” She murmured, “You’re exhausted…”

“I have enough for this.” He replied, finger trailing down her skin, “I can’t stand the thought of their hands on you…”

His eyes met hers again as he felt her hand at his waist. Lucien had no idea what he would have done if Malak had succeeded in what he’d tried to do that morning. As the bruising faded he traced his fingers up her arm and across her shoulder, smiling when she shuddered. Realising that it was no small thing that on the same day she had nearly been raped she had come to him, willingly getting into another males bed, Lucien touched the tip of his nose to hers. Her soft giggle warmed him and he smiled at her. “Does this feel okay?” he asked, hoping that the way his leg was pressed against hers, and his hand had settled gently against her back, holding her carefully to himself wasn’t pushing her too far.

“Yes.” Elain’s voice was soft as she met his gaze. “You make me feel safe.”

Lucien wanted to pull her tightly against himself, roll her beneath himself, and kiss her until she moaned his name, but he didn’t. Instead he smiled at her. “I’m glad.” Her fingers scratched at his hip and Lucien rubbed her back. “You should get some rest.”

Nodding, Elain’s eyes moved back and forth across his face for a moment before she rolled to put her back to him. Lucien thought his heart may have stopped for a second before she reached back and took his hand. “Would you just…” she pulled his arm around her, pressing back against him.

“Absolutely.” He murmured, settling his palm against her ribs and holding her gently. 

“…do you think your mother is okay?” Her voice was so soft Lucien barely heard her. 

“Yes.” He breathed, lips pressed to her hair. 

“Are you okay?” she asked, her fingers moving over the back of his hand slowly, “After today… seeing that happen… people you knew. That used to be your home…”

Pausing for a moment to consider, Lucien let out a slow breath. “I’m okay.” He told her softly, “That hasn’t been my home for a long time.” He felt her nod, “And, all I was worried about was getting you away from it all.”

“Thank you.” her fingers stopped moving across his skin and her breathing slowed. 

Pressing a soft kiss to Elain’s hair, Lucien settled himself against her and closed his eyes. They both needed a sleep and he was glad that she had come to him. He would have a better rest while he was able to hold her than he would have ever had while she was anywhere else. “I love you.” He breathed, letting her sweet floral scent lull him into sleep.


	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

**Chapter 35**

Elain awoke feeling comfortable and warm and so very rested. It took her a few moments to recognise where she was, surrounded by reds and golds, and then she met russet and gold eyes and she smiled. “Good morning, Petal.” Lucien’s soft voice felt as warm as his bed and sent pleasant shivers down her spine. 

“Have you been awake long?” she asked, her voice creaky with sleep. Lucien’s gentle hand came to her cheek, his thumb grazing just beneath her eye.

“Not so long.” he answered, before a smile worked its way onto his lips, “I didn’t want to wake you.”

It was then that Elain realised that his arm was stretched beneath her and she had been using it for a pillow. She felt herself blush, sitting up to free him. He slowly retracted his arm, rotating his wrist gingerly and Elain bit her lip. “Sorry…”

Lucien grinned at her. “No, it’s… it’s the best dead arm I’ve ever had.” She couldn’t resist a soft laugh, but then Lucien had thrown back the covers and gotten to his feet. “As much as I would dearly love to stay in bed with you all day, I think we should find out the result of everything that happened yesterday and then get back to the Night Court. I’m sure Nesta is dying to see you.”

“If she knows what happened yesterday, yeah…” Elain would just bet that Nesta would be working herself up indeed. She got to her own feet, sweeping her hair back over her shoulder before looking back to Lucien.

“Meet you downstairs when we’re dressed?”

“Okay.”

Elain returned to her own room and changed as quickly as she was able. She moved to the mirror by the window and hurriedly pulled a brush through her golden brown hair, staring at her reflection as she did so. She looked as she always did but, she noted, she couldn’t ignore the wide smile that she wasn’t quite able to wipe off of her face. She was happy, she realised. As wrong as that seemed with everything that had happened yesterday, faeries being slaughtered, and an entire court in upheaval, she couldn’t deny the fact that she had awoken today happier than she had felt in as long as she could remember.

Knowing that it was due to Lucien, Elain allowed herself a few moments of thinking about what had occurred in his bed last night. She knew that she had wanted to go to him to feel more secure, and that had been effective. He did make her feel safe, and she knew that she probably wouldn’t have gotten much sleep if she had have stayed in her room by herself. He had been more than happy to have her join him, she had been able to feel how keen he had been though the bond, although she doubted he had been aware that he had been sharing various thoughts with her. Telling him straight up that she hadn’t gone to him for sex had probably been a good idea, Elain supposed. She had been able to feel how much he had wanted her, and she knew that she had begun to respond to that desire. He had known the limit, though, and she had trusted him to honour her wishes. She had known that he would.

Biting her lower lip, Elain wondered if she would have gone along with where things had begun to head if Lucien hadn’t have pulled himself back. She suspected that she would have, and that worried her. She knew that the bond pushed sexual desire along. That was rather the point of it. So, she had no idea if her desire had been her own or if it had been the bond trying to do its job. With a sigh, Elain turned away from the mirror and moved to put her hairbrush in her pack. She desperately wanted to figure all of this out, but right now, she had to get downstairs.

Tamlin was handing Lucien a small note as Elain descended the stairs and found them standing at the bottom. She could feel Lucien’s anxiety as he looked from his friend to the note in his hand. “Is this about the Autumn Court?” she asked, coming to stand beside Lucien. He just nodded, his eyes scanning the contents. Relief washed toward her down the bond a moment later. 

“Eris has assumed the Throne and is in control of the court.”

“And your other brothers?” Elain asked softly. “What of them?”

“It doesn’t say.” Lucien replied. 

“What will he do with Malak?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien’s eyes met hers. “Malak challenged him, and will again. If Eris wants to prevent that, he should have him put to death.”

“Not exile him?”

“There’s nowhere Malak can go that he will not remain a threat. There’s nothing that would stop him building a new force and returning to remove Eris.”

“Oh…” Elain wasn’t sure how she felt about that. She looked up when Tamlin held a small packet out to her. “…what’s this?” she asked, taking it.

“Seeds.” He replied simply, then went on when Elain raised an eyebrow at him. “I thought you might like to try and grow some of the flowers from the gardens here. I don’t know how they would react in the Night Court, but you can try.”

“Oh!” Genuine surprise coursed through Elain and she smiled at the High Lord. “That is quite thoughtful, thank you.” Tamlin inclined his head and then returned his attention to Lucien. 

“No word from your mother?”

“No.” Lucien said gently, “But, I have no doubt that she is well.” He believed that, Elain realised, and his confidence eased something within her. She had seen the way that Eris had cared for his mother, and she knew that he would have protected her to the best of his ability. The Lady of the Autumn Court would definitely be okay, and Elain hoped that she would see her again. 

Before long, she and Lucien had left the Spring Court and they had returned to the Night Court, finding the others at the Town House just before lunch. Nesta had leaped to her feet the instant Elain walked through the door to the sitting room, finding her sister engrossed in some book or other. 

“You’re back!” Nesta cried in an uncharacteristic display of joy.

Elain hugged her elder sister, giving her a reassuring smile once released. 

“Yes. Just now.” She watched Nesta’s blue-grey eyes move over her in an assessing manner, and she was suddenly very thankful that Lucien had healed her bruising the night before. “I’m okay.”

“We heard about the coup in the Autumn Court.” Nesta murmured, “And I was worried about what might have happened.” Elain saw her sister glance for a moment at Lucien who stood nearby.

“Emissary,” Rhysand’s voice came from the doorway, “come and make your report.” 

Elain met Lucien’s eyes for a second before he had followed Rhys up the hallway and out of her sight. She had thought to follow, wanting to hear what was said, and help explain if she could, but Nesta had taken her hands and pulled her across the room. “Tell me about it.” Her sister said, “I assume you’d like to see your garden, too…”

“I… yes…” Elain did want to see her garden. 

Feyre appeared beside them as they stepped outside, and Elain moved forward, checking on the most recent flowers she had planted. When she was satisfied that everything was doing well, she moved to a flowering vine wrapped around a nearby trellis. Since she had been gone, it had begun blooming healthily and, as she traced her finger across the pale purple flowers, she figured that it would need trimming soon. Tomorrow, she decided, turning back to her sisters.

Feyre was smiling at her and Elain moved to hug her younger sister. “How did it go?” her sister asked her, giving Elain a squeeze.

“Well enough, I suppose.” Elain replied, “Apart from the obvious.” She moved to sit on the stone bench nearby, and her sisters followed her. 

“Lucien is filling Rhys in on what happened with his brothers,” Feyre said, her eyes focused on a plant nearby, and Elain supposed she was communicating with Rhys. “But, tell us about the rest of it.”

“Oh.” Elain paused, “You mean Spring?” She smiled widely and Feyre nodded.

“How was Tamlin?”

“Well, at first he wasn’t too pleased to have us there. Mostly, Lucien, really.”

“As we expected.” Feyre put in, but Elain went on.

“They fought…” She thought for a moment about giving them the details of what had happened that morning, but she figured Nesta would blow up hearing about how she had also been hurt, so she figured she would stick to the basics. “Tamlin hurt Lucien, quite a bit. But, he was able to heal and then they talked…” she gave a light shrug, “It was fine after that. He was good about me wandering and he showed me flowers for my book. And he was good when we were trying to get out of Autumn…” Feyre was nodding, but Nesta had narrowed her eyes. 

“What, Nesta?”

“How do you know it isn’t some trick again?” the eldest asked, “He sold us out…”

“No.” Elain shook her head, “I know.” She looked back to Feyre, “The Spring Court is so beautiful. I can see how you were charmed by it all.”

“It is most stunning.” Feyre replied, “I thought you would like it there.”

“I used to dream of places that looked like that…” Elain told them, and Feyre smiled again. “Oh, but the Autumn Court.” She looked from Feyre to Nesta, “It’s unlike anywhere you could imagine, Nesta.”

“I’m sure.”

“The colours are…” Elain broke off, not even knowing how to describe them, “You need to see it. When it’s safe, of course…”

“How was Lucien, being back there?” Feyre asked, and Elain tilted her head. 

“He was on edge.” She looked at her younger sister. “They taunted him… but… he…” Shaking her head, Elain thought about the way Lucien had restrained himself from reacting the way his brothers had wanted him to. “He didn’t give them what they wanted.”

“And how were you?” Feyre prompted, grinning at her, “Being alone with him for so long?”

Elain felt herself blush and she dropped her gaze to her knees, adjusting the skirts of her dress smoothly over herself. “I… liked it.” She murmured, daring to look up and meet Nesta’s eyes. Her sister looked surprised. “He… is…” she flicked her eyes toward Feyre who was still grinning. “ He is the most … magnificent… male I have ever met.”

“He didn’t try anything, did he?” Nesta asked, her voice suspicious. Feyre elbowed their elder sister, but Nesta didn’t drop her gaze, staring at Elain expectantly. Elain met her sister’s eyes, unwilling to look away.

“He wouldn’t do anything I told him not to.” She said firmly. Nesta looked satisfied by that answer, but Feyre hid a grin.

“So, what now?” Feyre asked her, and Elain looked up at the sky.

“I suppose we head to the Winter Court next…”

“You want to keep going?” Nesta asked, “After what happened?”

“Yes…” Elain looked back to Nesta. “Checking on the courts would be more important now… and I really want to see the rest of them.”

Feyre was still grinning at her and Elain looked up when their younger sister got to her feet. “I’m sure you will.” She said, “But how about we all go and have some lunch. I’m sure the others would all be eager to hear about everything going on.” Elain nodded, not wanting to be the one to have to tell Mor that Eris was now the High Lord of Autumn. Rhys could have that job all to himself.


	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

**Chapter 36**

Watching as Elain turned fresh earth over in the garden bed, Lucien leaned back against the stone bench. With his legs stretched out before him, he smiled as he listened while she hummed to herself, creating space for new seeds. He had not expected Tamlin to gift her with seeds from the Spring Court, and it had surprised him. Everybody liked Elain, however. He should have anticipated that Tamlin would as well. 

When Lucien had come outside to find her earlier, he had discovered her pruning a flowering vine growing up a nearby trellis. The vine had been just about choking in purple flowers, and Elain had been hacking away at it far more vigorously than he ever would have expected her to be treating anything flowering. She had smiled when she had spotted him and he had asked her if he could have the cuttings. Although she had given him a questioning look she had agreed and, since then, he had been sitting on the grass with the pile of flowers beside himself.

Elain had been glancing at him every so often, clearly wondering what he was doing, but Lucien just smiled charmingly at her as he worked. He had seen the moment she had realised that he was making a flower crown because her eyes had widened and she had smiled broadly before looking quickly back to what she had been doing as if trying to pretend she wasn’t excited. Chuckling to himself, Lucien picked up the next flower to weave into his masterpiece creation.

As he continued to work, he watched Elain carefully planting the seeds from the small packet she had tucked into her pocket. He wondered if she was aware of the almost sensual way that she stroked the earth after covering the seeds, and he would have given almost anything to be able to hear what she was softly whispering to the seeds before she moved on to the next one. By the Cauldron, even the way she gardened turned him on.

When Elain had finished planting, she had come to sit with him, her dark eyes watching what he was doing with curiosity. “Where did you learn how to do that?” she asked him, head tilted to one side.

“This” he said, giving her a winning smile, “is a skill that I picked up living in the Spring Court.”

“Oh?” Elain asked, a smirk forming on her pretty face, “Did you and Tamlin used to sit out among the wild flowers braiding one another’s hair and making flower crowns?”

The image of that made Lucien laugh. “Not exactly.” Her smile was amused for a moment before it faltered. 

“Ah… something you used to do with other Spring Court females…” he could actually hear the jealousy in her voice and he fought a wide smile of his own.

“Never one like this…” he told her, weaving another flower into the crown in his lap. “This… is my masterpiece.” He grinned at her, “There’s not been another like it.”

She looked at him and he fastened the final stem, knotting it to keep everything in place. “It is quite impressive.” She murmured and he lifted it slightly, rotating it to get a better look at all angles. 

“Not quite finished yet…”

“Oh?” She asked and he leaned toward her, carefully setting it atop her head, sliding onto her hair. 

“There.” He announced. “Finished.” Lowering his hands, Lucien allowed one hand to trace his fingers down Elain’s cheek. “It’s perfect.”

Elain lifted one of her own hands, touching the crown at her forehead before bringing her hand down to trace the back of his own hand at her cheek. “Thank you.” She said gently, lacing her fingers with his. “It is the most impressive crown I’ve seen…”

“You should see it now.” He murmured. She smiled at him, bringing his hand down into her lap, and Lucien had to work hard to keep his hand where she held it. His eyes moved over her sitting there smiling at him looking like the quintessential flower faerie with his crown sitting prettily atop her hair, and Lucien’s heart soared. 

“I’m sorry.” He told her, “For how I was in the Autumn Court.”

Elain frowned, “What do you mean for how you were?”

“They get under my skin…”

“No, Lucien.” She said gently, “I liked the way you handled yourself. I was proud of you for the restraint you displayed.”

He squeezed her hand gently. “Thanks.”

“I think we should maybe go in and clean up before dinner.” She told him, “It is getting late…”

He would have preferred to stay out here with her, but he got to his feet, pulling her up with him as he went. Since they had been back, Lucien had found it difficult to have to share her with the others. While they had been away she had been only his, but now he had to wait to spend time alone with her, and he always felt like if he so much as touched her Nesta would come barging in and punch him or something. Elain smiled at him as they headed inside. 

“What’s with that face?” he asked, amused. 

“Most of the others are up at the House of Wind.”

“Are they, just?” he felt a wide smile spread across his face. 

“Not all of them.”

*

With one last glance behind her at her garden, Elain stepped inside with Lucien. She could feel how pleased he was that most of the others would not be around tonight. To be fair, she felt the same way. She knew that he kept trying to find time alone with her, and was getting frustrated every time someone else would appear. She felt it too. While they had been away, she had enjoyed the freedom she had had in getting to explore her developing thoughts and feelings regarding him. Since being back, it felt as if someone was always watching her, ready to step in if they got too close, or question her regarding every little thing she did. 

As they headed through the sitting room, Elain paused hearing Nesta’s whispered voice and she moved to look around one of the bookshelves. She felt Lucien behind her and both froze when they spotted Nesta leaning back against the wall, looking up at Cassian who was grinning at her, his face mere inches from hers. Elain watched in shock as her sister grinned up at the Illyrian before apparently noticing her and Lucien nearby. Nesta’s grin faded, causing Cassian to also glance around at them.

Lucien cleared his throat, wrapping an arm around Elain’s shoulders and she moved closer to him, “Well, we’re late for something incredibly important.” He said, turning her and moving her quickly for the door. Elain just went with him, shock still coursing through her. When they got out into the hallway she felt Lucien let out a small laugh. “Did you know that…?”

“No…” she breathed, shaking her head. “She always acts like…”

“Maybe it’s new.”

“I don’t know.” Elain replied, laughing as they moved for the stairs. “Did you see their faces?”

“Certainly did.”

Elain smiled when she felt Lucien press a kiss to the top of her head before she headed into her room to wash the remnants of her gardening off of her and change her dress before dinner. She wondered vaguely if Nesta and Cassian would be present for dinner with them, because she had figured Nesta would stay, but she had assumed that Cassian would join the others at the House of Wind.

Pulling her brush through her hair, Elain smiled at her reflection before replacing the crown Lucien had made for her atop her honey brown hair. She hadn’t been lying. It was rather magnificent, and she completely intended to have him teach her how he had done it. She had been making flower crowns her entire life, and she had never managed one even remotely as impressive as this one. 

Bending to her vanity, Elain picked up the small bottle of perfume she had purchased in Velaris a month or so ago. She hadn’t had reason to use it as of yet, but now she tipped it up, anointing her fingertip before pressing it to her throat. Her eyes moved over her reflection once again and, upon deciding that she was presentable enough, she turned and headed for the door. She would make sure she got some time alone with Lucien tonight, even if she had to drag him off to some dark corner of the house after dinner. She was sure she could manage it.


	37. Chapter Thirty-Seven

**Chapter 37**

Sitting in the dim light, the room lit only by the fire before them, Elain shifted closer to Lucien on the soft couch. Nesta and Amren had been the only others at dinner with them and both had gone upstairs to work on something or other together afterwards, so Elain had found it only too easy to drag Lucien into the sitting room where they could find a quiet space to be together. She watched the fire for a moment before glancing his way and, noting the pleased smile on his face as his eyes moved over the flower crown she still wore, she felt herself blush slightly. 

“Did Rhys say anything to you about when we might leave for the Winter Court?” She asked, shifting her gaze back to the flames dancing before them. 

“No, not yet.” Lucien’s voice was soft, and Elain thought it almost sounded like the fire itself. “I think that it might be good to give the courts time to process the change in Autumn first.”

“And how long might that be?” She looked his way. 

He shook his head, giving a light shrug. “Could be a week or more.”

Elain tried not to pout, but wasn’t sure how well she managed that. She suspected not well at all when Lucien laughed gently. “Are you still so eager after what happened?”

“Yes.” She replied, “I…I want to see it all. Prythian is so much more beautiful than I imagined, and I need to …” she made a vague gesture with her hands, not knowing how to explain. He took one of her hands in his, holding it gently, and she looked back up to meet his eyes. 

“You will.”

Elain smiled at him, pleased that he sounded so sure about that. “You promise?”

“I promise.” he agreed, giving a solemn nod, “Even if not for this, I will take you to all the different courts.” Elain’s smile widened at his words, and at the fact that she could hear his heartbeat increase as he looked at her. She watched as his russet and gold eyes flicked back up to the flower crown before locking onto her face once more.

“You’re staring at me.” She said, smiling again. 

Lucien’s fingers gently began to caress her hand, still held gently in his own. “Yes… I am.” His voice was a gentle as the crackling fire again. “You are breathtaking to behold.” Elain laughed, even as she felt the colour rise in her cheeks. Lucien pulled her hand slowly toward himself. “You are.”

Smiling, she met his gaze, feeling warmth spread throughout her. She believed that he truly thought so, because nobody had ever looked at her the way he did, and Elain wondered if anyone had ever really seen her before. 

Apparently realising that she was now staring back at him, Lucien gave a soft laugh of his own. “I’m sorry for not being as worth staring at as you are…” his gaze dropped for the briefest of moments before meeting hers again and Elain could tell he’d meant his words as a joke, but she could hear the undercurrent of his truth behind them. She just looked at him, watching the way the firelight danced in his vibrant hair, making the colours shift and change, and she moved closer to him on the couch. 

Lucien looked surprised, his golden eye flashing in the flickering light, as Elain lifted her hand from his own large hand to his face. She touched him gently, tracing his scar from his brow to his jaw. His eyes closed as he surrendered to her touch, and Elain suspected that he had never let anybody touch him like this. “You might think of it as imperfection,” she breathed, “but this…” she traced her fingertips over his scar again, “does nothing to diminish your beauty. I wouldn’t have you any other way than how you are.” She paused, her eyes moving over his handsome face again. “I like it.”

When his careful hand touched Elain’s shoulder, she leaned forward, pressing her lips to his scar, feeling Lucien shudder as she did so. She moved closer again, bringing her other hand up to the side of his neck, her lips grazing his cheek as his fingers tightened on her shoulder, drawing her closer. Elain smiled when Lucien suddenly turned his head slightly, and she could feel his smirk when his lips caught hers. She opened to him instantly, and he lifted her into his lap, as his tongue swept into her mouth. He’d moved so quickly she had not had time to process it, yet somehow his hands were in her hair as he pressed further, deepening the kiss, and Elain could do nothing but groan her appreciation for the way his tongue moved against hers, sending waves of warm fire throughout her entire body. 

The heat spreading through Elain sparked something else within her and she slid her left hand from the side of Lucien’s neck down and across his shoulder as she pressed herself flush against him, her other hand still at his cheek, stroking him as she returned his kiss. One of his hands left her hair and, a moment later, she felt it slide around her waist as he hooked an arm around her, locking her in place. With a jolt, Elain realised that she could feel how hard Lucien was beneath her and her breath caught in her throat at the thought of anyone walking into the room to find them like this. 

When she had stopped, Lucien had lifted his head to look at her, and she met his questioning look with a shy smile. The burning look in his russet eye made her want to kiss him again, but she swallowed that desire and traced her fingers down his scar once more. Her fingers, she realised, lined up with the worst of it, and she flinched when she realised that had been exactly how Amarantha’s claws had raked down his face. “Why did she do it?” she asked softly, her eyes tracing his scar carefully, “I mean, I know I saw it… but her reaction was extreme…”

“I should have kept my mouth shut, and I didn’t.” Lucien’s reply was flat and she looked up at him. “It’s not the first time it has gotten me into trouble. I need to learn to control it.”  
Elain shook her head. “I like your mouth.”

Lucien smirked. “Wait until you see what else I can do with it.” He froze the instant the words were said, and Elain blushed. She couldn’t resist a low chuckle however, and Lucien visibly relaxed. His fingers moved lightly from her hair down to her shoulder, tracing her skin in the firelight and Elain smiled again, feeling warm and content in his lap. 

As the fire burned lower, Elain let her eyes continue to wander appreciatively over Lucien’s scarred face. She could still feel his uncertainty, and his desire to hide the scar as he noticed her looking so closely, and she dropped her gaze, not wanting him to feel uncomfortable. Instead she leaned into him, listening to his steady heart. “I wish that you could see yourself the way I see you.” She murmured. 

“I… it’s still kind of new to me.” He told her softly. “Amarantha held that masked ball so soon after it happened, apparently as a way for me to hide the scar… and then I wore that mask for nearly fifty years, unable to take it off, until Feyre broke the curse.” Lucien’s hand moved gently across Elain’s back, “For so long I couldn’t see it… not all of it. And, it hasn’t really been that long since the curse was broken. Every time I look in a mirror, I’m still somewhat surprised by what I see…”

Elain sat up straighter to look into his face, meeting his gaze again. “I’m sorry.” She said gently, her hand coming up to touch the bottom of the scar again at his jaw. “It… your face kind of feels as familiar to me as my own face.” She smiled, “It makes no sense… yet I feel it.” She stroked his jaw with her thumb. “… I like every part of it.”

She blinked when both of Lucien’s hands came up to cup her face as he carefully brought his lips down to hers in a soft kiss. “I wish that you would love me.” He breathed, and Elain’s heart stuttered in her chest. 

She met his eyes silently, not knowing what to say or do to respond to those words and, just as she drew a breath, trying to figure out something to tell him, they were interrupted by an enraged scream from the doorway. 

“LEAVE ME ALONE!” Nesta’s voice rang out as she marched through the room, apparently not noticing them entwined on the couch by the fire. Before either Elain or Lucien could do or say anything, Cassian stalked into the room, hot on Nesta’s heels. 

Elain watched silently as Nesta threw open the other door and disappeared and Cassian hurried after her. She heard the Illyrian’s low murmur of something he directed at Nesta who only shrieked that she was moving out as soon as possible and that he could go to hell. The door slammed shut after them and Elain turned her eyes back to Lucien. He looked as shocked as she felt and she leaned back, shifting herself off of him and back to her end of the couch. 

Neither of them said anything, but Elain knew that they were both thinking that if Cassian and the others had returned from the House of Wind, then they were running the risk of being walked in on by someone who might actually notice their presence. It was probably best if they headed upstairs for the night.


	38. Chapter Thirty-Eight

**Chapter 38**

__

_Elain stretched out before him, her hands sliding up under her pillow, groaning as he ran his own hands up her smooth back, gathering her silky hair and pushing it up over one shoulder. He watched as she turned her head to look at him over her other shoulder, meeting his eyes with a smirk. Lucien slid both of his hands down to her hips then, lifting her into the right position before he buried himself in her in one swift stroke. Elain’s soft gasp was followed by a low groan and the sound sent heat burning through Lucien’s veins as he held himself still for a moment, forcing himself to take one slow deep breath after another. When she dipped her head, pushing back onto him a little, he took that as a sign that he was free to move and he tightened his hold on her hips as he rocked forward into her. She groaned again and Lucien grinned._

_Hearing his name fall from Elain’s lips in a soft sigh was like being struck by lightning and he lifted her hips higher, dragging her back onto himself as he thrust again. She let out a small cry and he thought for a moment he’d hurt her, but then dark eyes met his over her shoulder once more and that thought vanished._

_“Do that again.” She murmured. Lucien did so and was rewarded with another loud cry as her eyes closed. “Ah… yes!”_

_Wanting to hear her continue to make those sounds, Lucien began a steady rhythm, his hands tight on Elain’s hips, as he continued to pull her back to meet each of his thrusts. He listened intently as her voice became a little breathless as she urged him on and he watched as her hands slid around the top of the mattress before taking hold of the headboard. Then, she was pushing herself back onto him and Lucien slid one of his own hands from her hip, up her spine to the back of her neck, holding her in place as he continued to fuck her._

_Elain continued to groan, her hands tight on the headboard, and Lucien’s blood pounded in his ears. When she moaned his name, looking over her shoulder at him again, however, Lucien pulled her up and around, flipping her onto her back beneath himself. He was on her a second later, kissing her as she wrapped her legs tightly around his waist as he began to move inside of her again. When he felt her hands slide into his hair, he pressed his face into her neck, his eyes closing as she began to moan his name once more, her lips now against his ear.  
_

When he opened his eyes in the dark, Lucien knew that his hands were already on himself. He gave a soft groan at the feel of his own touch, and then threw the sheet back and swung his legs around off the bed and to the floor. He needed to go to her.

The decision warred within him for a few moments. Everything inside him was driving him to get up and go to Elain’s room. What would she think, however?

That choice was hers, he decided, getting to his feet. Quickly, he pulled on a pair of pants and a loose shirt and then he was striding for the door and up the hallway. If Elain told him to leave, he would obey. She could leash him if she wanted to. She had that control, and he would do whatever she said, but he needed to go to her. He needed to hear her say it.

*

Elain looked up from her book when her door opened. Lucien stood in the doorway, hair sleep-messed and his shirt halfway unlaced. She was surprised that she hadn’t heard him approach, especially considering the rate at which his heart was currently thundering. The sight of him, standing there as he was, fire burning in that russet eye, set heat flooding through Elain. Sitting up a little straighter and looking at him, she knew that she was already slick with desire. She wanted him, she realised. But, what did he want? Why was he currently standing in her doorway, staring at her like that?

“Lucien?” she asked, her voice a little shaky. “… what…?”

He stepped forward, his eyes steady on her face. “Thought I might show you what else I can do with my mouth.”

Elain stared at him, her breath caught in her throat. He made no move to come closer however, simply watched her, waiting for whatever she would decide. Swallowing thickly, Elain tried to think.

She thought about earlier on the couch, and the way that he had kissed her. She thought about how he had held her face in his hands, and the way she could tell he could truly see her when he looked at her. She thought about his self-doubt, which she could still feel trickling down the bond to her, growing stronger with each moment that she said nothing, and she thought about the fact that his mere presence now was just about setting her on fire.

Her hand shaking slightly, Elain set her book aside. Lucien took another step into the room, flicking the door shut behind himself as he moved closer, his eyes still on her face. Nervously, she smoothed her nightdress over her legs, watching as he approached. “I…I…” her breath caught, and she fell silent.

“It’s okay.” Lucien’s voice was low and soft and Elain just watched him as he crawled onto the bed and toward her, his eyes on hers the entire time. Her breath was coming in short, uncertain gasps until he reached her. She made a small sound as his hand slid from her knee up her thigh as he leaned over her to kiss her softly, and Elain parted her lips for him instantly.

Moving between her legs, Lucien brought a hand up to Elain’s cheek and she leaned into his touch as he sought to deepen the kiss and she couldn’t help a soft moan as his tongue moved gently against her own. As his other hand slid into her hair, Elain settled back against her pillows, feeling herself relax as Lucien moved with her. When he shifted his hand from her cheek down to brace himself and support his weight as he leaned over her, Elain allowed her own hands to come up and touch him, one at his chest, and the other trailing slowly up his arm.

Heat burned through Elain at the satisfying feeling of Lucien’s firm body against her own and, when his lips travelled across her cheekbone and down to her throat, she felt herself shudder. Lucien slid a hand down her side before she felt him beginning to drag her nightdress up her thighs, and Elain bit her lower lip as he pressed his lips to the side of her throat. “It’s okay,” he whispered, breath hot against her skin and Elain nodded silently. Her eyes slid closed again when she felt Lucien’s tongue against her throat and her hand slid around to skim across his back, her nails catching in his shirt.

When he ran a gentle hand up the inside of her thigh, Elain’s eyes opened. “It’s okay…” his voice was soft in her ear and she found herself holding her breath. She gasped in surprise, jolting a little, when Lucien’s hand reached between her legs, and she felt his fingers slide against her, moving easily through her slick desire. He lifted his head then, his russet and gold eyes appearing before her and Elain met his gaze, gasping again as his fingers continued to move. “Tell me if you want me to stop…” his voice was low and guttural and Elain shook her head a moment before Lucien’s lips met hers again. She shuddered as his fingers explored her, the touch of a hand not her own, sending jolts of excitement coursing through her. A pleased satisfaction washed over Elain down the bond, and she knew that Lucien had realised the effect he was having on her. He met her eyes again for a moment before lowering his head to press his lips to her chest and Elain watched him curiously as he shuffled down, one hand tracing gently over her as he did so, his lips moving lower and lower.

“What are you doing?” She murmured, the first actual sentence she had managed since he’d arrived.

Lucien slid one of his hands along her thigh, catching behind her knee and lifting it wide as he looked back up at her. “Showing you what else I can do with my mouth…”

Elain sank her hands into the bedspread, gripping it tightly, as Lucien’s hand slid along her other thigh before lifting her knee and shifting that leg out wider. His eyes met hers again, and fire filled her veins. “Lucien…”

The corner of Lucien’s lips quirked up as he gave her a lazy smirk before turning to press a soft kiss to the inside of her knee, his eyes never leaving hers. “You smell delicious…” his words were practically a growl and produced a throbbing need between Elain’s legs. She swallowed thickly, her hands tightening on the bedspread as Lucien knelt lower, his hands sliding up her thighs again to her hips.

Elain could do nothing but watch him as he made sure her nightdress was pushed up out of his way before he tugged her down into a better position and lowered himself between her thighs. Finding herself holding her breath once more, Elain forced herself to inhale, watching him with rapt attention as he smirked at her again. He tilted his head, eyes on her face. “Just breathe.” He said, hand running slowly up and down her thigh before he turned his head to press another kiss to the soft skin there. She shuddered, hands still gripping the bedspread tightly.

Lucien held her gaze as he kissed the inside of her thigh again, moving slightly higher. Elain felt something inside of herself tighten in anticipation, unable to help her breaths coming in shallow gasps. The need in her built, mixing with the need she could feel coming from him, and she couldn’t help a soft whine when Lucien slid his hands under her, wrapping his arms around her thighs and fixing her firmly in place, holding her open. 

Russet and gold eyes met hers as he bent to her, and Elain felt his hot breath against her, sending shivers through her, before she felt the heat of his tongue. He licked her gently, tentatively, but Elain still let out a small cry, her hands clenching on the bedspread. She looked at him as he lifted his head slightly, and she watched as he licked his lips, smiling at her. “Oh, Petal,” he murmured, “You _are_ delicious.” Elain was sure she would have blushed if she hadn’t already been on fire. When she didn’t say anything, Lucien smiled before lowering himself to her again.

This time his hot mouth closed over her and Elain’s head fell back against her pillows as she tried to resist another gasp. Any semblance of self-control she still maintained vanished however, when she felt his tongue lick her entirety, slow and confident. “Ah!” her eyes closed as she gave a loud cry. He did it again and Elain’s hands flew to his hair, carding through it and holding tightly as he repeated his action yet again, growing quicker with each repetition. “ahh-AH!” Lucien’s arms, wrapped tightly around her thighs, held her in place as he continued to lick at her when her hips began to buck beneath him. 

Elain let out another loud shriek, before gasping as she suddenly felt Feyre brush against her mind with concern. Her sister hurriedly retreated and, a moment later, Elain felt one of her little air shields descend around the room. If Lucien had noticed, he made no indication that he had and Elain couldn’t keep her hands out of his hair as his tongue pushed into her and she screamed again.

She tried to be gentle as her hands moved through his hair, but she ended up tugging at him, seemingly tried to pull him closer and Lucien’s only response was to hum his approval against her and push that clever tongue deeper. It wasn’t long before Elain’s back arched and Lucien released one of her thighs to bring a large hand up to her abdomen, pushing her back down onto the mattress as he attempted to hold her there, all the while maintaining his torturously blissful rhythm which was sending little bursts of electricity throughout her body. She shrieked out her warning, her hands fisting in his vibrant hair, a moment before she came with another scream as he held her down, licking and sucking at her throughout it all and never ceasing until she had gone still and lay gasping his name. Her hands moved more gently though his hair then and, eventually, he lifted his head to meet her eyes once more.

“Lucien…” she breathed his name and he answered her with a smile, pressing a last gentle kiss to the inside of her thigh before he released her and crawled up to lay beside her. Elain turned toward him, her heart still thundering in her chest. 

“You see?” he murmured, a hand coming up to brush her hair back from her face, “Talking isn’t all I’m good at…”


	39. Chapter Thirty-Nine

**Chapter 39**

When Feyre sat down opposite Elain at the table the next morning, Elain stared hard at her teacup. She could feel her younger sister’s gaze and she could feel herself blush. 

“So…” Feyre began softly, and Elain looked up, her eyes flicking quickly around the room to make sure nobody else was nearby.

“SHH!”

Feyre laughed, her eyes lighting up. “I haven’t said anything.”

Elain glanced around the room again. She hadn’t seen anybody yet, but that didn’t mean they weren’t about. “No, I know…” she bit her lip.

“If you were worried about people hearing you, maybe you should have considered that last night…” Feyre grinned at her and Elain nodded. “If I didn’t put that little shield up…”

“I know.” Elain murmured, “I didn’t think… It wasn’t exactly planned…”

Feyre leaned forward on her elbows on the table, resting her chin in her hands. “Tell me more…”

Elain felt heat flush her cheeks again. “No…”

“Come on,” Feyre pressed, grinning. “Does he fuck like he’s got fire in his blood?” Elain stared at her sister who shrugged. “Just something I was once told about Autumn Court males…”

Elain rather thought the fire had felt like it was in her blood. “We…”

“Ah.” Feyre sat back in her chair again, the smile still on her lips. “Just what I saw then…?”

Running a hand over her face, Elain groaned. “I can’t believe you saw.” Feyre let out a chuckle.

“I promise I cut it off as soon as I realised what was happening…”

“I know.” Elain murmured, looking at her sister again. “Thank you.” She watched her sister reach forward and pour herself a cup of tea before settling back again and cradling the cup in her hand. 

“Still,” Feyre mused after a moment, “I assume that last night was the first time something like that happened?”

“Mmm.” Elain nodded, lifting her cup to take a small sip.

“Does that mean that you’re going to accept the bond?” She heard Feyre trying to sound light, but the edge of seriousness in her voice betrayed her.

“I…” Elain frowned, “I still don’t know.” She said softly, “The intensity… of the bond is… overbearing. I don’t know what belongs to me and what is the bond.”

“The bond is a part of you.” Feyre tilted her head, “Like it’s a part of Lucien.”

Elain met her sister’s eyes. “I thought you would be someone who would understand the importance of making your own choice.” 

Feyre’s eyes tightened around the corners for a moment before she smiled. “You certainly made a choice last night.” Elain lifted her teacup again to avoid having to respond. “…I’m sure Lucien knows how to put that clever tongue to use.”

“Feyre!”

“What?” Feyre asked innocently. 

“… do you know why Nesta and Cassian were arguing last night?” Elain sought to shift her sister’s focus on to a topic that wasn’t her.

“No…” Feyre tilted her head, “I did hear them when I got back, though. He probably suggested she train with him in the morning or something…”

“Are they…?”

“Who knows?” Feyre spread her arms wide and gave an exaggerated shrug. “I don’t even think they know what they’re doing…” her eyes met Elain’s again. “Seems to be an Archeron trait at the moment.”

“Hey.” Elain frowned, “That’s hardly fair…”

“At least you admit you like Lucien.”

“… I think I do.” Elain dropped her gaze back to the table. The fire that had burned within her the night before had been beyond anything she had previously experienced, but she knew that it had been fuelled by the bond. What she couldn’t figure out was how she might have felt without it.

“I think you need to discuss it with him.” Feyre said simply, and Elain looked at her once again. “You’re not the only one it surprised.”

“…I know that.” Elain swallowed. She did. She knew that it was unfair to Lucien to pull him closer with one hand, while keeping him at bay with the other. None of it was fair to either of them but, she supposed, at least Lucien might understand where she was coming from. Afterall, the bond had been forced on him too.

*

Striding along the path, Lucien eyed the Sidra. As soon as the sun had come up, he had left the house, needing to find somewhere quiet where he could be alone with his thoughts. On his way out the door, he had come face to face with Rhys. The older male had indicated with a smirk that he was aware that Lucien had spent, at least part of, the night in Elain’s bed and that had been all the more reason to get out of the house before anyone else was up. Cauldron help him if Nesta knew.

He walked with purpose, even though he wasn’t actually headed anywhere. The blood pumping through his veins helped wake him up even more than the cool morning air, however, and it helped him to focus his thoughts. Wanting to think about the previous night, Lucien let his mind wander back to when he had opened Elain’s door and found her reading on her bed. She had looked surprised, but he’d been able to smell her response to him the moment he had stepped through the door. When she had put her book aside, a silent invitation, he had thought his heart might break through his ribs. He had been able to sense her nervousness, and his continued whisper of “It’s okay,” had probably been just as much for his own benefit as for hers. Lucien could hardly believe what had happened then. He had been more than a little surprised and so very pleased at Elain’s reactions to his touch. He knew that she had wanted him, at least physically, but the way she had held on to him and the sounds she had made when not calling his name suggested that she wanted him more than that. The fact that she had allowed it at all suggested that she wanted him more than physically. Elain had so far been able to deny the physical pull of the bond easily enough. If she was allowing more now, then perhaps she felt more…

Lucien wanted more.

He found himself at the little bakery Elain favoured and, thinking it had been a while since he had picked up something sweet for her from the place, he headed inside. While he had loved being away with her, and having her all to himself, as they had gone through the Spring and Autumn Courts, and he so desperately wanted to continue on to the other courts with her, he did rather miss the little routine they had fallen into before it all. He had loved bringing her some pastry and sitting out in the garden with her while they had talked and begun getting to know each other better. If nobody else had claimed her time when he got back to the house, he hoped they might revisit the routine today. Talking to her about what had happened would definitely be a good thing. If things were progressing as he hoped they were, it would be best to be open about it. He knew that the others were clear about his feelings for Elain, but they really should be made aware of hers. He didn’t relish the idea of Nesta trying to eviscerate him every time he was anywhere near Elain. Maybe he could even speak to Rhys about some kind of soundproofing for the bedrooms. He was certain the High Lord’s room had some kind of protection because he knew that Rhys and Feyre couldn’t go ten minutes without their hands on one another, yet he’d never heard a thing from them. 

Deciding that he was probably thinking too far ahead, Lucien tried to rein his thoughts in a little. He would settle with one thing at a time. Get the pastry. Take it back to Elain. Get her out into the garden, so they could spend the day in the sun and talk a little. That was his plan.


	40. Chapter Forty

**Chapter 40**

He found her outside, as he suspected that he would. He smiled and slid the door closed after himself as he stepped out into the garden with her. “Good morning, Petal.”  
She looked around at him and smiled, and he felt his heartrate increase in response. “Hi.” Moving closer, Lucien grinned and lifted the small bag he held, watching as her eyes widened and she straightened, wiping her hands on her skirt as she did so. “Is that from…”

“Of course.”

She grinned back at him and turned toward the blanket that she had put out under their usual tree. Lucien looked at it with surprise, wondering if she had known he would be hoping they might slip back into their old routine today. When she sat down he handed her the bag and watched her open it to peek inside. “Oh, it’s got that glaze…” She reached into the bag and pulled a small pastry out as he sank down beside her. Handing the bag back to him, Elain gave him another smile and pleasant tingles spread throughout him. 

“Thought you’d like that.”

“Mmm… it’s that really pleasant nutty flavour…” 

He watched her take a small bite, her eyes closing as she let out a small groan, and the sound went straight to his cock. He tried not to think about the sounds she had been making last night as she had tugged at his hair but, when her eyes opened and flicked directly to him, he knew that his thoughts had been clear. A light blush appeared on her cheeks and she turned her attention back to the pastry in her hand. Lucien pulled another from the bag and began picking it apart in his own hands, placing tiny strips into his mouth every so often.

“I have missed this.” He told her, and those dark eyes lifted to his own again. 

“Me, too.” She said. “Even though everything has been quite… interesting… lately. This was nice…”

“While we’re here, then…” He wiped his hands on his pants. “Perhaps we should aim to maintain tradition.”

“Yes.” Her eyes moved over him and Lucien knew exactly when her thoughts went back to the previous night. He watched her eyes grow even darker and even the way she held herself changed. He watched then as she licked her lips with her pretty pink tongue before catching his eye and dropping her gaze.

“… Rhys said something this morning that suggested he… ah… he knows.” Lucien watched her reaction carefully, wondering exactly how mortified she might be by that knowledge.

“Yes…” she murmured, wincing a little. “Feyre… heard… me…” She went scarlet, flicking a glance up at his face before looking away again. “She… put a little shield around the room…”

Lucien wanted to laugh. He knew, however, that Elain definitely would not have appreciated that. He settled for staring at the blanket for a moment as he tried to keep his face neutral before looking back up to her. This, at least, would lead nicely into what he wanted to talk to her about.

*

Elain knew that Lucien was amused. She could see him struggling to contain a laugh, and she narrowed her eyes at him. “You think it’s funny.” She accused. He looked guiltily at her, before running a hand over his face.

“Sorry.” He murmured, “I know I shouldn’t…”

She just raised an eyebrow at him. “I suppose…” she agreed, “if we had have heard Nesta…”

Lucien looked horrified, and it was Elain who laughed then.

“Elain…” he asked, sounding hesitant, and she looked at him expectantly. “Had… had anyone ever done that for you before?”

She blinked, shocked. “No…” she looked at him, “Why would you think that?”

“I… didn’t.” he said, shaking his head, “I just wondered. You… were engaged…” 

“No…” She murmured, “Graysen tried to make me once…” She remembered him kneeling over her on a couch one day, trying to make her take him in her mouth. 

A low, feral, snarl escaped from Lucien and she looked at him quickly. “…what do you mean ‘make’ you?” he asked and Elain blinked slowly. 

“We hadn’t seen one another for a few weeks.” She said, unable to take her eyes off of his face, “When he returned he… he told me that if I had missed him, I would want to… pleasure him.” The last two words came out as barely more than a whisper, and she watched something feral move behind Lucien’s russet eye.

“And you did not…”

“No.” Elain said primly, smoothing her skirts out as she dropped her gaze to her knees, “I did not. I told him that we were not married, and it was not proper.”

“…we’re not married.” His voice was soft and Elain looked back up to meet his eyes. “I… I hope that you don’t think that I made you…”

“No.” Elain said quickly. “I don’t think that. I know that you waited for me to make that choice…” She bit her lip. “It… feels different… from… how it was then with him.”

“Fae marriages are not the same as mortal marriages.” He told her gently. “And sex is… viewed differently…”

“It’s not common for fae to wait for marriage?” She asked quietly, “I had always thought I would… but…”

“That’s a very mortal thing.” He replied, his eyes moving over her, but Elain saw no judgement there. “And, you’re no longer mortal, Petal.”

“No.” she agreed, “I’m not…”

Pleasant anticipation and hope began to reach Elain down the bond from Lucien and she looked at him. He was watching her with a small smile, and she could feel how pleased he was. “Did you enjoy it?” he asked, and she felt herself blush again. “Last night?”

“I did.” She told him, and his smile widened. “Lucien…” she breathed, something tightening in her chest. His eyes moved back and forth across her face.

“…you’re conflicted about it.” His head tilted as he looked at her. “Is it because we’re not married?”

“That’s…” she paused, not knowing how to say what she needed to. “That’s part… part of why I am hesitant to accept the bond…”

The brightness leeched out of Lucien’s russet eye and his face went blank. “I don’t understand.”

Drawing a deep breath, Elain figured the best way to explain would be to just tell him all the thoughts she had been having. “It’s not that I don’t want you.” She said firmly, “You need to know that. I do want you.” She met his eyes, “So very much…” Swallowing, she went on. “But that’s just it… I can’t tell if it’s me… if it’s me who wants you because you are you, or if it is the bond just telling me I want you.” 

She paused again, waiting to see if Lucien had anything to say, but he just looked at her as if he were a puppy expecting to be kicked, because that was what had always happened in the past. She struggled to swallow, clearly able to feel him down the bond now, and feeling as if she had been punched in the chest.

“I also…” she went on, “I want to know that you want me.”

Lucien looked confused then. “I thought I have made that clear…”

Elain crawled toward him, reaching out and taking his face gently in her hands, as she looked directly into his eyes. “I appreciate that you have given me the time and space to try and work it out. And, I’m nearly there. I think I’m nearly there.” She murmured, thumb moving across his cheek, “But, I want to be sure. I want to be sure that it’s me choosing you… and I want to be sure that you choose me.” She shifted closer on her knees, “I know that the bond makes you want me, but I want you to be certain that you want me. I want you to have that choice. I want to know that you would choose me without that primal force driving you toward me. You deserve that choice too. You don’t have to submit to the bond just because it’s there.”

Lucien’s metallic golden eye clicked and whirred as he looked back at her, and Elain wondered how it was possible for him to be even more handsome while he was thinking. Eventually he nodded. “I understand.” He said gently, lifting his hands to take hold of her wrists. Elain let him draw her hands away from his face and she sat back on her heels. He was hurt, she could feel it, and she hated herself for being the cause of that pain. She leaned forward a little when Lucien suddenly shifted and got to his feet. “If you would excuse me, Lady.” He said, “I need to think.”

Elain felt tears well in her eyes as he turned and strode back inside. She could feel his disappointment, and his near certainty that she would tell him that she was rejecting the bond any day now. That was not the message she had tried to convey, but she figured she should give him a while to think about what she had said. He was not stupid, and she knew he was someone who would think on what had been said to him. Lucien paid attention to words, and Elain was sure she had used the correct ones to get her point across. Hopefully, when she spoke to him later, he would understand what she had been trying to say.


	41. Chapter Forty-One

**Chapter 41**

Elain was dirty by lunchtime. She had knelt in the garden, pulling weeds that had sprung up since the last time she had gone over it and, as they day grew warmer, she had begun to sweat in the heat. Covered in sweat and dirt, she supposed that she should definitely bathe and change before trying to sit down at the table inside for lunch.

“Are you joining us?” Mor asked, as Elain strode toward the stairs, “We could have brought something out for you if you weren’t finished outside…”

“I need a break anyway.” Elain responded with a smile. “I’ll wash and be back down soon…” She cast a glance into the dining room as she passed. Lucien was not at the table. Perhaps she would check his room before coming back downstairs.

After a quick wash, Elain pulled on a fresh dress of periwinkle blue before running her brush through her hair. She pulled her hair around over one shoulder and quickly braided it to keep it out of her face. On her way to the door, Elain paused, spotting the small book that Lucien had given her on her vanity table. Thinking that she might later speak to Rhys about which flowers he might like included in her book for the Night Court, she moved to pick the book up and slip it into her pocket. 

Stopping by the door to Lucien’s room, Elain knocked quietly. “Lucien?” she called softly. There was no answer, and she bit her lip. Maybe he had already gone downstairs. She knew that he wouldn’t have ignored her if he had been inside, no matter how upset with her he was. Tilting her head, she listened for his heartbeat and, sure enough, it was coming from downstairs.

Elain had just reached the bottom of the stairs, when she saw his vibrant hair. “Lucien…” She froze when he turned to her, and she saw his pack in his hands. “… what are you doing?” she asked, her breath catching in her throat.

“I’m… leaving…” he said softly, and Elain tried to fight down panic.

“N-no…” She replied, shaking her head, “I… didn’t mean to make you leave…” she took a step toward him, “Please don’t…”

Lucien gave her a half smile. “It’s not forever, Petal.” He told her gently, shouldering his pack. 

“Please…” Elain took another step toward him, “I didn’t mean to push you to leave…”

“I know that.” He said, adjusting the strap of his pack over his shoulder. “I… I think you’re right.” His voice was gentle, and Elain realised that her hands were shaking. She clasped them tightly before her, unable to take her eyes off of him. “I’m not running away, and I’m not leaving you…” his eyes moved back and forth across her face, “I’m not giving up.”

“Then why are you leaving?” she could hear the hint of tears at the edge of her voice, but swallowed them.

“What you said to me.” He said, his eyes meeting hers. “I think you were right. I’m pretty certain that I know my own mind… but, putting some space between us will allow me to clear my head and you deserve to know that I have chosen you.” He glanced down at the dark rug between them for a moment and then back up to meet her eyes once more. “I owe it to both of us to be certain.”

Fear gripped Elain for a moment. She pushed it down, trying to focus on what he had said. “But you think you are certain…?”

Lucien nodded, but then frowned. “I am.” He said, “I would have come to you again tonight. I know it. And, I don’t want to put the responsibility on you to say ‘no’, when I had been unable to say it to myself.” He ran a hand through his silken hair, “If you want certainty, this is how we have it.”

Elain took a hesitant step toward him, wanting to hug him, but she was uncertain if she even had the right considering he was leaving to work out if he even truly wanted her. Lucien suddenly dropped his pack at his feet and strode toward her. He came to a stop just before her and lifted a hand to her cheek, Elain just stared up at him.

“Don’t take long…” she breathed and Lucien nodded.

“Maybe a couple of days.” He replied and Elain bit her lip. 

Slowly, she lifted one of her own hands and slid it up over his shoulder and around the back of his neck before she moved forward and buried her face in his collar. Lucien’s warm hands came to settle on Elain’s lower back and she squeezed her eyes shut when she felt him use his hands to press her to himself. All too soon he had released her and stepped back. Elain lifted her eyes to his to see him looking her over from head to foot as if trying to commit her to memory. As she watched, his face went hard and she felt bitter resignation reach her down the bond. Lucien let out a slow breath before he turned and walked back to the door, picking his pack up as he went. She wanted to tell him not to go, but she said nothing, watching silently as he opened the door and disappeared from her sight.

Bringing a trembling hand up to cover her mouth and stifle any sobs that may escape, Elain spun away from the door. Panic rose in her again and she strode down the hall toward the back of the house. Pushing the door open, she stepped out into the garden, staggering slightly as she moved down onto the grass, and she shook when she felt the moment Lucien winnowed and was gone. Lowering her hand from her mouth, Elain drew gasping breath after gasping breath, trying to fight back tears that threatened to choke her. She could feel the distance. He was further from her now than he had been in weeks.

“Elain…?” Mor’s voice from behind her made Elain jump in shock and she closed her eyes for a moment before turning to face the blonde. “Were you co-” Mor broke off upon seeing Elain’s face and Elain tried to force a smile, “What happened?”

“Nothing…”

“Lucien.” Mor’s dark eyes narrowed, “What did he do?”

“He…” Elain felt the tears coming, and could do nothing to prevent them welling in her eyes, “He left.” Her voice was thick and she turned away again before Mor could see her cry.

“Oh…” Elain heard Mor take a couple of steps toward her before stopping. “Nesta and Feyre are both up at the House of Wind…” Elain just nodded. Mor’s hand touched her for a second before retreating. “I… Az is inside, if you’d like me to send him out…” Elain nodded again. Azriel knew how to sit in silence and not try and force her to talk and, right now, Elain did not want to talk.

As she heard Mor head inside, Elain moved to the stone bench and sank on to it. Now, as the tears came, Elain didn’t fight them. She just sat, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees, and allowed herself to cry. After several moments, she felt Azriel sit down beside her on the bench and she lifted her head with a sniff, wiping at her eyes.

Azriel sat still, his hazel eyes flicking toward Elain as she looked at him, but he said nothing. 

“Did… Mor tell you?”

He nodded. “She said Vanserra left.”

“Mhm.”

“This upsets you greatly…”

Elain nodded, running a hand over her face and sitting straighter. “It’s my fault.”

“I can’t imagine how that could be the case.”

Elain let out a soft groan, her fingers moving into her hair, pulling her braid loose. “I hurt him.” She told Azriel, “I told him that I couldn’t accept the bond until I knew that it wasn’t the only reason he wanted me. That it wasn’t the only reason I wanted him…” She looked again at the Illyrian beside her. “So he left…”

“To prove that he does truly want you?” Azriel asked. Elain bit her lip and nodded.

“That’s his plan.”

“Why does this upset you?”

Elain drew a slow breath, trying to work out how to explain. “I… quite often can feel what he does.” She said softly, “The bond shows me.” Azriel’s eyes remained fixed on her face, and he didn’t move, so Elain went on as he let her speak without question, “And I could feel how much I hurt him. Like everyone else always has. I could feel his doubt that I would truly want him without the bond, and his expectation that I would tell him I was rejecting the bond… and… I can feel how far away he is now and … I…” she shook her head then, not knowing how to finish that sentence.

Azriel was quiet for a long time and then spoke. “Maybe he’s right.” He said gently, and Elain opened her mouth to protest, but he went on. “It hurts now because it’s fresh.” His hazel eyes met hers, “And, while I have no experience of the bond, it does heighten emotions around one’s mate. After a day or so, I imagine you will both be able to think more clearly… and then you’ll know.”

Swallowing thickly, Elain nodded. “You’re right…” she murmured, “He’s right…” She looked down at her hands in her lap, and then back up to Azriel. “Thank you for listening to me.” He lifted one of his own hands, placing it gently on Elain’s back.

“It was my pleasure.” He told her softly.


	42. Chapter Forty-Two

**Chapter 42**

Lucien forced himself to keep walking. Ignoring the tug of the bond, telling him to turn around, to go back to her, he grit his teeth and took one step after another. He knew that Elain was crying, he could feel it, and everything in him was screaming at him to go and fix it, make it better, but he knew that this was the right thing to do. After what she had told him on the blanket out in the garden, Lucien had thought long and hard about her words. Even though it had hurt him to hear that she hadn’t acted out of some realised desire for him the previous night, he had still considered what she had told him. Eventually, he had realised that she was trying to give him the same time and space that he had given her. She was trying to ensure that he had chosen her of his own free will, that he had fallen in love with her the way he had fallen in love with Jesminda. He had loved Jesminda because she had seen inside him and wanted him for who he was, not what he was, not because he was the High Lord’s son. Elain wanted the same, he realised. She wanted him to love her because of who she was, not just because she was his mate. Lucien wanted that too and, while he was fairly sure that he did feel that way about her, Elain deserved to know that. He also desperately hoped that she would realise she felt something more for him.

It had taken him some time to work up the courage to make the decision to leave. It wouldn’t be for long, he decided. A few days should give them all the time they needed. He would, he knew, have to get far enough away that the distance would let them think clearly, and the moment he winnowed, he had felt Elain’s reaction to the distance. He didn’t know where he was going. He didn’t really have anywhere he could go…

Instead, Lucien found himself wandering. He had spent a lot of time moving around Prythian on his own over the years, and he knew that he would have no problem continuing to do so for several days, but he wanted somewhere he could sit and think. He didn’t want to wander aimlessly. Not trusting himself to stop walking to think, he forced himself to keep going. Briefly, he considered going back to Tamlin. That, he decided, would prove too much of a distraction. He didn’t want to be focused on his old friend while trying to sort his head out. He could, he thought, go back to Vassa and Jurian. Almost as soon as he considered that thought, he had dismissed it. Jurian had begun to get on his nerves. Vassa, too, had begun acting strangely toward him in a way that got under his skin. Also, Lucien figured, if Graysen happened to be present at the Manor, he didn’t know that he would be able to let the prick live. Certainly not after what Elain had just told him that morning.

He really had nowhere to go. No real friends, despite the fact that he knew just about everyone. Lucien considered the fact that he could, he supposed, walk into nearly any court as Rhysand’s Emissary, and he knew that he would be given shelter. He didn’t want to do that, though. He didn’t want to be surrounded by people who didn’t care about him. Nobody did, though. Bitterness rose in him at the thought. For centuries, he had done whatever he could for whoever had needed him, only to be cast aside again and again. He’d been made an exile twice now, and still had no home or family to show for it. He figured he could disappear right now and nobody would even notice.

Shaking that thought off, Lucien tried to remind himself that that wasn’t true. His mother would definitely care. He knew that Elain would, too. Even if she never accepted the bond, he knew that she would be upset if he vanished without a trace. He wouldn’t do that to her. He had no desire to cause her more pain than he already had. His mother and Elain, the only two who truly cared for him, and he couldn’t go to either of them. Running his hand over his face, Lucien forced himself to think. 

Turning then, he remembered a cabin he had stayed in for a few days while he had been searching for Feyre under Tamlin’s orders. It had been long abandoned then and, he hoped, nobody would disturb him there. If he pushed himself, he could probably be there by dark.

By the time he’d winnowed close enough to the cabin to walk the rest of the way, Lucien was exhausted. He just about fell against the door, pushing it open. Staggering inside, he noticed that it was the same as the last time he had stayed here, and he gave a sigh of relief. He groaned a moment later when he realised that he hadn’t thought to grab himself any food before leaving and he was going to have to hunt for his dinner if he wanted to eat for the night. He was already hungry not having eaten anything since that sweet pastry that morning during his conversation with Elain.

At the thought of Elain, guilt and pain washed over him and he grit his teeth against his instinct to go straight back. She had stopped crying, he knew, but he could still feel her misery. She would be fine, he told himself. She had Feyre and Nesta to take care of her, and Nesta was probably already telling her how much better off she would be without him. He felt guilty at that thought, knowing that if Nesta did say something like that to Elain, it would only upset Elain more. 

Setting his pack on the scrappy mattress on the floor, Lucien forced himself back to his feet and turned toward the cabin door. He would need to catch something soon if he hoped to cook it in time to eat before he passed out for the night. It wouldn’t take him long, he promised himself. He had spent more nights than he could count fending for himself when he hadn’t wanted return home, both back in The Forest House, and later in the Spring Court. As he stepped outside, he turned left, remembering the small stream nearby. When he came to the edge of the stream, Lucien shrugged out of his jacket and set it under a nearby tree before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt and removing his boots. He paused for a second more to roll his pants up, before wading out into the water. 

He let his thoughts return to Elain as he watched and waited. An image flashed before his eyes of Elain’s bedroom. She had wrapped herself in her bedspread as she lay curled against the pillows, her book sitting nearby as she stared at her knees. She was alone.

Snatching the fish that moved past his ankle, Lucien straightened and climbed out of the stream. The fact that Elain was alone suggested that she wanted to be. He had no doubt that if she had desired company, she would have had it. Nobody in Rhysand’s Town House would have denied her that, even under normal circumstances. She could have been down in the living room listening to Nesta and Cassian snap at one another, or in the dining room watching Mor and Amren drink, or even up in the library with whoever she chose to speak with. She had any number of options and those who cared for her. If she was sitting alone in her room, it was because that was what she had chosen.

As he dressed and walked back to the cabin, Lucien tried to reach for the bond. He couldn’t tell exactly how Elain was feeling, and the bond was giving him nothing further. Perhaps she had figured out how to shut it off, or perhaps he was just too far away. That had been the idea, he reminded himself when he had a moment of panic at the thought. As he collected some firewood and piled it carefully, Lucien tried to send a reassuring thought to her, letting her know that he was alright, but he wasn’t sure he managed that. If the distance was too great, it wouldn’t even matter that she hadn’t actually accepted the bond and he wasn’t sure it would have worked even if he had been closer. Flicking a thought at his pile of firewood, Lucien watched as flames erupted and the fire quickly began to burn happily as if it had been going for hours. She had been able to hear his heartbeat even when he’d been in the Mortal Lands, he reminded himself. Even that far she had been able to hear that he was alive. He hoped that would comfort her now. 

Quickly preparing his dinner to cook, Lucien settled down to wait. Three to four days, he supposed. After that, he would go back to her and they would see what would happen then. That would be plenty of time or, he supposed, about as long as he suspected his willpower would last. 

After he had eaten, Lucien let the fire burn low before he headed back inside the cabin and settled down on the scrappy mattress. He wished that he was able to hear Elain’s heartbeat the way she could hear his. It would have done wonders to soothe him and make up for not being able to feel her now. Closing his eyes, he promised himself that the time he had already spent away from her practically counted for one day. Three more, he told himself. Three more days and he would go back.


	43. Chapter Forty-Three

**Chapter 43**

Her stomach rumbling, Elain made a face and sat up on her knees in the garden. She pressed the back of her dirty hand to her stomach and groaned. She had had nothing to eat since a biscuit with her quick cup of tea at breakfast, and she was starving. Glancing around at the door to the house, she wondered if there was anything in the kitchen she might grab. If Lucien had been here, he would have brought her something sweet from her favourite bakery by now. The thought made her sad, and she pushed it aside before she began to wonder where he was. Too late, though. As she got to her feet, Elain tried to work out where Lucien would have gone. She didn’t think he would have gone back to the Spring Court or to Tamlin. He had been staying with that mortal Queen with the curse before he had come back to Velaris, so perhaps he had gone there. She pushed that thought away with irritation. The mere thought of that woman with her flaming hair irritated Elain, and she roughly dusted her hands off on the skirts of her dress before stalking inside.

Rhys was in the kitchen when Elain walked in and he regarded her with a raised eyebrow after taking one look at her face. “Something wrong?” he asked silkily. 

“No.” Elain moved toward the cupboard where the biscuits were usually kept. She pulled the door open and pulled out the tin. 

“Just want a snack?” he asked innocently, and Elain turned to look at him, leaning back against the cupboard as she yanked the lid off the tin and took a biscuit out. 

“I’m hungry.” She replied, sliding the tin onto the bench.

“It would appear so.”

Elain just looked at him, taking a bite of her biscuit. 

Rhys watched her for several moments until he tilted his head, violet eyes following her every move. “Are you sure nothing is wrong?”

“Where do you think he went?” Elain hadn’t meant to ask the question, but it had slipped out anyway. Rhys just nodded, clearly thinking for a moment. 

“Are you asking because you want me to find out and tell you?” he asked her, “Or just because you can’t stop wondering?”

“I…” Elain bit her lip. “I don’t know.”

“What would you do if you knew where he was?”

Elain considered. “I…” Would she be able to stay here with that knowledge, or would she go and try to bring him back? She didn’t know, so she just shook her head.

Rhys pushed away from the bench he was leaning against and continued to watch her. “If you decide that you want to know, I’ll have Azriel find him. Otherwise, Elain, it’s best to keep your mind occupied with other things.” He paused for a second to make sure she was listening, “Trust me.” She watched as he strode from the room before she turned to the biscuit tin again and took another. 

If she was to keep busy, then she would have to find a way to occupy her mind, not just her time. She had begun a new book just the other day, perhaps she would bring it out to the garden to read in the sunshine. She could also continue to work on the descriptions of the Night Court flowers she would include in her book. She could do research on some of the other courts that she was yet to visit, so that she would know more about them when she finally got to see them… There were options. It wasn’t as if she was without things to do.

Later that afternoon, Feyre and Nesta marched out into the garden and Elain looked up from her spot beneath her favourite tree. Her sisters stood over her, hands on hips and she raised an eyebrow at them. 

“Come on.” Nesta said, reaching down to grab her hand. 

“Come on where?” Elain asked, frowning.

“We’re going shopping.” Feyre responded. “Just the three of us.”

Elain allowed her older sister to pull her to her feet. “Shopping for what?”

“For fun.” Feyre replied, grinning. 

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I know.” Pale eyes moved across Elain’s face for a moment, “What do you want to go shopping for?”

“I don’t know, this was your idea.”

“Fine, we will just see where we end up.” Feyre began leading them back inside.

Elain saw Cassian watching them from the sitting room when they walked through the house. He gave her a wink but said nothing, and Elain turned her eyes on Nesta who pretended she hadn’t even seen him as they headed out the front door. “So, whose idea was this then?”

“Amren’s.” Feyre replied. “She said that shopping always cheers her up.”

“You think I need ‘cheering up’?” Elain muttered.

“Don’t you?” Nesta asked, her arm still linked tightly through Elain’s.

“Guess I could use some distraction.”

Nesta looked at her with calculating eyes. “Food, dresses, or books?”

“Do you mean ‘which one first’?” Elain asked and Nesta smiled at her. 

“We do have the whole afternoon.”

“Books, then.”

Elain walked silently between her sisters as they headed for the largest of the bookstores in Velaris. When they got there, she wandered off on her own, perusing the shelves half-heartedly. Every so often someone would pass her with a polite greeting, and Elain would wave and smile in response. She chewed on her lower lip as she walked slowly, her fingers trailing along the spines of the books she passed. Many of them she recognised from Rhys’ shelves, so she moved toward the newer releases, looking for something that might be of interest. She had finished the last of the books Lucien had given her that morning, and she had marked several passages she wished to talk to him about. He had been correct in his assumptions, and she had enjoyed every last one of them. Sighing, she wondered when he would return.

“Have you found anything you like?” Nesta’s voice surprised Elain who turned to look at her sister. A small pile of books was being held cradled in Nesta’s arms, and her sister looked her up and down quickly. “Were you even looking?” 

“I… I was.” She glanced around the room. Feyre was browsing some shelves across the other side, a small stack already in her arms as well. 

“I don’t think you’re being adequately distracted.” Nesta said, and Elain flicked her gaze back to her elder sister. 

“I just haven’t found anything that has piqued my interest.” As the words left her mouth, Elain’s eye caught on a prettily ornate golden book nearby. _Customs and Features of the Day Court_. She picked it up, her eyes moving across the cover, before turning it in her hands and scanning the back. 

“The Day Court?” Nesta asked, and Elain nodded as she opened the cover.

“Oh…” She scanned the contents page, “Customs and Traditions, Architecture, Music and Art… Helion…” Elain closed the book with a snap. “Look at that.” She said, “Something interesting.” She tucked the book under her arm.

“You’re interested in the Day Court?”

“Mhm.” She wondered if there was anything in the book that Lucien didn’t know about his biological father. When he returned, she would give it to him. Perhaps they could learn more about the Day Court before Rhys sent them there.

Elain spent the rest of the afternoon with her sisters. They made their way through various shops, purchasing new dresses and other various luxuries before ending up at their favourite restaurant. In the months following the war, the three of them had made it a habit to have dinner out together regularly, and Elain found that it did ease something within her. She felt easier by the time they returned to the Town House and, after taking her purchases upstairs, she curled up on her bed with the book on the Day Court.

Deciding that she would leave the section on Helion for Lucien, she flicked instead through ‘Architecture’, looking at the images of majestic buildings with interest. The Day Court looked rather grand and impressive, she decided. She would love to explore it further, and hoped that when they visited, she got the chance. Then, unable to resist, she flicked further through the book, stopping when she found a portrait of Helion. “…wow.” She murmured. The High Lord looked pretty much the same as he had in the image Lucien had shown her when they had been in the Autumn Court and, looking at him now, Elain took in his features. He really did have the same nose as Lucien.

Sighing, Elain closed the book and pushed it away. She missed Lucien, she realised. Not even just the aching pull of the bond, but she missed _him_. She missed being able to speak to him, or tell him about something she had read, and she already could barely wait until he returned so she could discuss those passaged she had marked earlier. Elain missed his sarcastic comments, and the way he would smile at her when she got excited about something she was talking about. Earlier that morning, Elain had found herself focusing intently upon flowers she found particularly beautiful so that she might be able to show him with her mind when he returned, and she really should have realised it then. 

Reaching over to the table beside her bed, she picked up the little book he had given her and opened it to the first page. With a careful finger, Elain traced where he had written her name, embellishing it with his fancy handwriting. He had clearly been thinking about he when he had done this, before he had come back to Velaris. Flopping onto her back against her pillows, Elain sighed. She missed him. She wanted him to come back.


	44. Chapter Forty-Four

**Chapter 44**

_The light breeze ruffled his hair, tendrils of Elain’s honey brown hair blowing across her face as she gazed up at him. He lifted a hand to her cheek, brushing her hair back as pink petals rained down around them, falling from the tree stretching above. When Elain wrapped her legs around his waist, Lucien bent to press his lips to hers, pushing forward when she opened her mouth to him. The soft groan she made into the kiss had him reaching between them, dragging the skirts of her dress up to her waist. She loosened her legs enough for him to push the dress out of his way and provide him with enough space to undo his own pants._

_Glancing around them he looked back to Elain’s dark eyes as he raised a questioning eyebrow. They were laying on her blanket under the tree in her garden at the Town House and, while everyone else was up at the House of Wind, Lucien wasn’t sure that Elain would be okay doing this here. She just grinned at him, and he felt one of her hands slide up the back of his neck and into his hair._

_“Hurry up…” she breathed._

_“As you wish, Petal.” He gave her a lazy smirk before kissing her again. When she tugged gently at his hair, Lucien shifted his position over her, bringing his hands to her hips before carefully pushing into her tight body. Elain’s quiet moan sent his heart racing in his chest as he felt her tighten her legs around his waist, holding him inside her. Her hand slipped from his hair to his cheek and he felt her trying to lift his face so that she could look at him. Lucien raised himself a little until he could meet her gaze. Watching the emotions flicker through her eyes, he slowly began to rock his hips, listening to the soft sounds she made as he moved gently inside of her._

*

Elain stared at the roof in the darkness. The faint glow of the moonlight outside meant that she could see little more than outlines and shadows around her room, but she didn’t need to see more. Her heartbeat was still quickened from the dream from which she had just awoken and, if she listened very carefully, she could hear that Lucien’s was as well. She had known that it had been his dream the moment she had opened her eyes in the darkness, and something about that knowledge had comforted her. She hadn’t been able to feel him since not long after he had left. He had been too far away to feel anything, and she had only been able to hear his heart when the world was quiet and she really listened hard. 

This dream had been the first thing she had managed to glean from him, and the fact that he was still dreaming about her at all comforted her. As she ran her fingers over the garnet necklace Lucien had given her, Elain bit her lip. The dream had been interesting. It had been sweet and gentle, and not some perverted physical release that was all about fucking her body. She had wanted him, in that dream. That had been a large part of the fantasy, she realised. Lucien had been dreaming about her wanting him. 

Rolling on to her side, Elain sighed. It had been difficult enough for her to fall asleep earlier, she knew she wasn’t getting back to sleep now. She still missed him, and she dearly hoped that he would return tomorrow. If he didn’t, she was strongly considering having Rhys locate him. Then, Elain thought, perhaps she might go and tell him to come back. Would she actually do that? She didn’t know. She thought it might have been disrespectful. To ignore his struggle purely for what she wanted was unkind. It was selfish. Making a face, Elain clutched at the necklace at her throat. She would just have to wait, she decided. He had said that he would only be gone a few days. She would just have to deal with that. He would return when he had figured out what he wanted, and she would have to wait until that had happened. Rolling onto her back again, Elain kicked the sheets off of her legs. She was burning.

Closing her eyes, she allowed the images from that dream to wash over her again. She rather liked the thought of laying on her blanket under that pretty pink blossoming tree while allowing Lucien to kiss her like that. She just hoped that, if that ever happened in reality, they really wouldn’t be interrupted by anyone coming out into the garden. She didn’t want to think about how embarrassed she would be if Cassian or Amren came outside and found them. She would probably never hear the end of it.

Opening her eyes again, Elain realised that she was contemplating a possible future in which she and Lucien would be laying around on blankets in gardens and kissing. What did that mean she wanted? She suspected it was more than just for him to come back. She really wasn’t going to get any further sleep tonight.

Elain lay awake in her bed until dawn when she finally allowed herself to get up and get dressed for the day. Grabbing the new book she had begun, she took it downstairs to the dining room to wait for the others and for breakfast. Something told her that it was going to be a long day.

She was quite surprised when she found Feyre and Rhys already at the table, and they looked up as she entered, coming to a halt in their conversation. 

“…what is it?” Elain asked, sinking into a chair opposite her sister. Feyre slanted a glance at Rhys, and Elain just waited for her to respond, pouring herself a cup of tea as she did so.

“We received a message from Vassa and Jurian.” Feyre’s voice was soft, and Elain’s eyes snapped directly to her sister’s.

“Is Lucien there?” she asked, a sick feeling twisting in her stomach. She had wondered if he had gone back to them. If he had, what did that mean? Jerking the teapot upright when she realised her teacup was now full to the brim, Elain focused again on her sister.

“No… Well, the message didn’t say so if he was.” Feyre shook her head, “They want us to try and break Vassa’s curse. They found something they want me to try as ‘Cursebreaker’ and Nesta and Amren may be able to try a few things… and you, too…” Feyre paused for a second, “I’d like you to come and see if your abilities might show us anything…”

Elain set the teapot down carefully, drawing one slow breath after another as she thought about that. Graysen owned that manor. He had given it to Vassa and Jurian. She knew that he frequented the place. She really did not wish to run into him if he happened to be visiting while they were there. “When?” she asked, looking back to Feyre and Rhys.

“We would leave today.” Rhys replied. 

“What about Lucien?” Elain asked. He was meant to be returning any day now.

“He can meet us there.” Feyre said, “We can send word to him.”

“You don’t know where he is…”

“We can find out.” Feyre smiled at her.

That would make him come back, Elain knew. If he found out that she was going to that manor, with even the slightest chance of seeing Graysen, Lucien would come back. “Okay.” She said.

*

Dropping the wood he had collected by the small firepit, Lucien let out a sigh. He had nothing to do here. He had sharpened and polished all of his weapons this morning, and he had cleaned out the little cabin so that it was more habitable. He had collected enough firewood to last him far longer than he intended to stay, and he was beyond bored.

Hesitant to sit down and read, he eyed the surrounding area again. He knew that he would get through his book in next to no time and he hadn’t brought a second. With a muttered curse, he went and picked the book up, throwing himself down in a chair in the sun. He wanted to know what happened in the story. It was engaging enough that he would probably read it again anyway. Elain would like it, he thought. Perhaps he would suggest it to her when she had gotten through the pile he had already given her.

Setting his book in his lap, Lucien stared at the trees. He missed her. He wanted to go back. It hadn’t been that long, though. He hadn’t been able to feel her since he had first arrived, so he had no idea if she had had enough time to figure out how she felt about him. It hadn’t taken him long at all to work his own feelings out. His desire to get back to her hadn’t diminished, and it was no longer just the pull of the bond. He wanted to be with her, talk to her. He wanted to hold her hand, and sit with her in the garden. He wanted to see her wonder and expressions of awe as they travelled thorough the courts of Prythian, and she got to experience the unique beauty of each. He wanted to listen to her excitedly talk about what she had learned or what she had been reading, and he wanted to tell her about what he had been doing and know that she was listening. Nobody had ever listened to him the way Elain did, genuinely interested in what he was saying and attentive enough to care. He was in love with her. It was as clear as day, and Lucien knew that he had been in love with her for a while.

When the Morrigan walked out of the trees, Lucien got to is feet, his book still held loosely in his hand. “How did you find me?” He asked.

“Az can find anyone.”

“Ah.” 

Mor’s dark eyes looked past him to the cabin and she raised an eyebrow at him. “Is this your house?”

“What, no?” He replied.

“Who lives here?”

“Nobody…” He watched her looking around before she turned back to him again. 

“Why’d you come here?”

“Does it matter?” He asked, setting his book on his empty seat. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to get you.”

Fear spiked through Lucien. “Is Elain alright?”

“She’s fine.” Mor replied, waving her hand dismissively. “Been a bit withdrawn, but she’s fine.”

“Then why do you need me?”

“Oh, it’s your choice to come.” Mor said easily, “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to. We’re all going to that little manor you shared with Jurian and that mortal queen. They want Feyre to try and break the curse again.”

“Elain too?” he asked, hoping that the Graysen prick wouldn’t be there. Mor just nodded and Lucien bent to pick up his book.

“Let’s go.”


	45. Chapter Forty-Five

**Chapter 45**

Striding into the large sitting room, Elain’s eyes swept the grand decorations. It was rather impressive, for a mortal home, she thought. Since she had begun to see more of Prythian, she found that she was less impressed by what she saw around her than she would have been even two years ago. Nevertheless, it was a nice mortal house.

Following Feyre and Rhys, Elain came to stand beside Nesta who stopped just to the left of their youngest sister. They stood and looked at the two people before them. Jurian stood by a window, his shifty eyes following them, and Vassa sat resplendent on a large armchair that may as well have been a throne for the way she commanded the room.

“Welcome.” The mortal queen said, her bright eyes sliding over them and coming to rest on Elain for a moment. Elain met her gaze, feeling a little unnerved. Looking away, Vassa gave a weak smile, “It is lovely to see you all again. I hope you have been doing well since we last saw one another.”

“We have.” Feyre replied and Vassa nodded, looking them over again. “I must tell you again how sorry I am about what happened to your father.” She gave a light pout. “I think about him all the time.”

“That must be so difficult for you.” Nesta’s voice was sharper than Elain had heard it in a long time, and she flicked a glance at her older sister. Nesta’s back was as straight as ever as she stared at the titian haired queen. Reaching out, Elain lay a soft hand against her sister’s arm and Nesta turned her face toward her for a moment, a look of thanks in her fierce eyes.   
When Jurian moved closer, Elain turned her attention on him. She wouldn’t trust that man for an instant. She knew that he had betrayed his fae lover to her death, and then sought another for leaving him for a fae lord. There was no way he could be trusted. She watched Jurian eyeing them while Feyre and Vassa discussed how they might try to break the curse, although her attention wandered and she began taking in the rest of the room again. 

When she heard her name, Elain looked back around. Vassa’s bright eyes were on her, but it was Feyre who gestured in her direction. “Elain?”

“Yes?” Elain asked, wishing that she had been listening. 

“Tomorrow morning, will you try and see if you can see anything that might help us?”

“Yes, of course.”

Feyre nodded and returned to her conversation with the queen. Vassa smiled and nodded, talking with Feyre, but her bright blue eyes kept returning to Elain, moving over her in an almost assessing way that Elain found more than a little unnerving. 

The door behind them opened and Vassa’s bright eyes grew even more bright as she looked past them, half getting to her feet. Elain did not need to turn around to know why. She had felt Lucien the moment he had entered the room. Her eyes remained on Vassa.

Lucien came to stand beside Elain, and it took every bit of self-restraint she had to keep her hands to herself, and keep her eyes on Vassa before them. She watched as the queen looked Lucien over, more than a little obviously, and Elain couldn’t help but wonder what had happened between them when they had been travelling and living together here after the war. Jealously flushed through her, making her extremely hot. She felt Lucien turn toward her, obviously sensing something within her, but she kept her eyes firmly on Vassa.

“Oh, Lucien.” The queen said, a wide smile across her beautiful face, “You did come back after all…”

“He’s with us.” Rhys said, his voice silky, and Elain watched as Vassa’s eyes flicked directly back to her. 

“Oh, yes.” She said, giving them another smile. “Of course.” Elain just stared at her, not liking that smile at all. It was the smile of a spoiled little queen who completely expected to have her every desire catered to. Vassa must have found the curse that changed her into a firebird during the day completely inconvenient. “Well,” Vassa said, clapping her hands together and looking back to Feyre, “I will have you shown to the rooms that have been prepared for you. You’re all on the east side of the manor. I thought you might enjoy the morning sun.”

“… coming from the Night Court?” Nesta asked drily.

“Oh… I…” Vassa frowned for a second, “I just thought you’d like to get a start on the day nice and early… since I… won’t be helpful at that time.”

“We will be happy with any rooms you give us.” Rhys said, and Elain was sure she heard the faint hint of amusement in his voice.

“You can have your old room, Lucien.” Vassa said then, turning her eyes back to Lucien who Elain finally allowed herself a glance at. Her eyes moved over him, pleased that he looked as well as the last time she had seen him. It felt far longer than it had been. “It’s just as you left it.” Vassa’s tone was light, but it sent another wave of hot jealousy coursing through Elain.

“I appreciate that.” Lucien replied, and Elain ripped her gaze away from him. She looked again at Vassa, taking a step back as Nesta began to retreat. 

Then, as everyone else began to move toward the door, Elain turned. “Lucien,” Vassa’s voice rose above the low hum of voices, “We have a lot of catching up to do.” Moving quickly, Elain strode from the room, needing to get out. She didn’t know what was happening. She had never felt this jealous in her life, and the feeling had never had this much of an effect on her. She could barely breathe, and her entire body was hot. It almost felt like she was having a panic attack.

*

When Elain turned and ran away, Lucien felt his heart sink. He had hoped when they had seen one another that things would go a little differently. He had fantasised about Elain throwing her arms around him, of being able to hold her close and promise that he would never leave her for so long again. Instead, she had barely looked at him, and then run away at her first given opportunity. He had felt something from her as she had stood beside him, but he hadn’t been able to identify it.

Perhaps she had enjoyed her time away from him, and she wasn’t ready for it to end. The thought saddened him, and he decided that he wasn’t ready to be cooped up in his room just yet. He turned and headed for the gardens. He had greatly enjoyed walking out there when he had stayed here before. Nobody ever looked for him there, and he had always been able to clear his head. That was what he needed now. He had realised that he was in love with Elain, but what if she had come to the conclusion that she did not want him? He didn’t know what he would do if that was the case. Where would he go?

He wasn’t going back to live in that cabin…

Lucien let out a heavy sigh as he stepped into the hedge maze. It was delightfully quiet out here, and he rather thought that some peace was what he would need. He could feel Elain now, stronger than he had been able to back in the Night Court. He didn’t know if that was because they weren’t in a faerie court, or if it wasn’t actually any stronger than it had been but rather he was just noticing it more now because they had been distanced the last few days. Either way, it stirred something inside himself and he fought the urge to seek her out. Instead, he wandered, feeling restless, and not knowing what to do.


	46. Chapter Forty-Six

**Chapter 46**

Elain set her bag on the bed. She had been shown to a pretty little room with a tall and extremely enormous bed, and it looked enticing and comfortable. She would definitely have to climb up into it, and the thought made her smile. It had been a while since she had seen such a luxurious bed. She suspected that later she would very much enjoy getting to rest there, as she figured she would need the rest. Her earlier suspicion that it would be a long day had been correct. They journey had taken seemingly forever and they hadn’t arrived until well after nightfall. At least Vassa had been in her human form by then. Although, Elain suspected, she would probably better enjoy the time during the day when the other woman was a bird.

The powerful feeling of jealousy that had flooded Elain earlier had very much taken her by surprise. Never in her life had she felt it so strongly, and it had never had such a physical sensation. She had been hot enough that she had wanted to shed her dress, and she hadn’t been able to properly breathe. Every time that mortal queen had looked at Lucien, another wave of jealousy had hit Elain. It was evident that Vassa had more than a little interest in Lucien, and Elain still couldn’t help wondering what had gone on between them. He had stayed with her for months, and Elain couldn’t believe that the redheaded queen had done nothing about her interest in all that time. Lucien was extremely attractive, and it was did not surprise Elain that any mortal woman would develop an interest in him. The thought, however, that he may have returned Vassa’s interest twisted Elain’s stomach. Another wave of hot jealousy flushed through her and she turned toward the door with a huff. She needed to get out. She needed some cool night air, and a fresh breeze.

Striding up the hallway, Elain searched for a way back downstairs so that she could find her escape. She did not expect Nesta to be already waiting for her a little further up the hallway. “Is that your room?” Elain asked, indicating the door in front of which her sister had been standing. 

“Yes.” Nesta’s sharp eyes followed Elain for a moment. “I wanted to check that you were okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Elain did not slow down as they reached the corner and she headed for the stairs. 

“I saw your face.” Nesta replied, “Earlier, talking to that … queen.”

“Oh?”

“You don’t like her.” Nesta said.

“I don’t know her.” Elain said softly. “You don’t like her.”

“Yes, well, I don’t like most people.” Nesta muttered, “You do. And you don’t like her.”

“Okay.”

“Why?”

Elain came to a stop and turned to face her sister at the top pf the stairs. “I… just didn’t like the way she…” pressing her lips together, Elain couldn’t make herself say it.

“You didn’t like the way she looked at Lucien.”

Blinking, Elain just met her sister’s eyes. She saw the moment that Nesta realised she was right, and her sister nodded slowly. “Maybe.” She murmured.

“Do you think they…?”

“I don’t know.” Elain looked away, “But… it…”

Looking back to Nesta, Elain saw her sister raise an eyebrow at her. “Ask him?” Nesta suggested.

“I…” Elain broke off when panic hit her down the bond. She staggered slightly, drawing a gasping breath as she grabbed at the bannister.

“Elain?” Nesta grabbed her arm, “What is it?”

Steadying herself Elain shook her head. “Something…”

“You seem panicked.” Nesta went on, and Elain glanced at her to see her sister still watching her. “Are you in pain? Do you see something?”

“No…” Elain murmured. “I have to find Lucien…” She began hurrying down the stairs, Nesta hot on her heels. Something was wrong.

“What is it?” Nesta asked.

“I don’t know.” Elain replied, “I can just feel him…”

Letting the bond guide her, Elain hurried outside and toward the gardens. The panic was still rolling down the bond to her, and Elain quickened her step as they hurried into the maze. “What can you feel?” Nesta sounded worried as she followed Elain. “Elain?”

“Panic.” Elain muttered, hurrying up the narrow passage. She kept moving, turning this way and that, and Nesta continued to hurry to keep up with her. They didn’t speak as they continued to search, before Elain came to a halt, hearing voices. Nesta froze beside her and they listened.

“Vassa, I’ve told you before…” Lucien’s voice reached them from somewhere nearby.

“But you’ve been gone for so long.” The sound of Vassa’s voice in response made Elain snarl. Nesta eyed her warily and with some surprise before they continued up the passage.

“Elain…” Nesta whispered, following her quickly, “I think you should…”

As they came around the next corner, Nesta fell quiet when Lucien and Vassa came into view. Elain’s breath caught in her throat as she watched the redheaded queen reach out, her hand closing around Lucien’s wrist as he tried to move away from her. “We’ve been through this.” He sighed, trying to keep her at bay as she followed him, pulling at his arm. “I have a mate…”

“Doesn’t she have to accept that?” Vassa asked, “She hasn’t, has she? So why not entertain someone who actually wants you?”

Fury flooded Elain and, before she could think, she was stalking forward. Lucien had backed up against the hedge as Vassa had continued to press closer and they both turned toward Elain as she approached. 

“Lucien.” When Elain reached them she held a hand out to him, not even glancing at Vassa. Lucien met her eyes and she held his gaze as he pulled his wrist from Vassa’s grip and took the hand Elain was extending to him. Something inside of her eased as Lucien’s fingers wrapped around her hand, and she exhaled a slow breath.

Tightening her grip on Lucien’s hand, Elain turned and began walking away up the narrow path, pulling him along with her. They passed Nesta who was still standing and watching Vassa and, as Elain got further away, she heard her sister’s voice, low and dangerous. “Stay away from my sister’s mate.”

*

Unable to take his eyes off of Elain, Lucien trailed along after her. He had never seen her like this before, and something about it pleased him to no end. She had come into the maze looking for him, he knew that. She must have sensed something down the bond, and she had come for him. Realising that what he had felt from her earlier must have been jealousy, Lucien couldn’t stop a wide smile from forming across his face as he looked her over. She had been angry when she had found them, and he had seen the look on her face as she had come to pull him away from Vassa. He had seen the possessiveness in her eyes, and it was easy to read as he knew it well. The fact that she would feel that way upon seeing another female touching him made his blood sing in his veins. 

Elain didn’t stop marching along until they came to an empty hallway back inside the manor. Then, she dropped his hand and swung around to face him. Slowly, she pressed herself back against a low window, lifting her eyes to his face. Lucien met her gaze, forcing himself to remain silent as she looked at him. He saw the moment the anger had drained from her, all confidence going with it, and she turned shy. Her gaze dropped to the floor and Lucien took a small step toward her. “Did you miss me?” he asked softly and Elain nodded, her eyes coming back up to meet his.

“It… it’s not just the bond.” She murmured, and Lucien took another step toward her, hope flaring to life inside him once more.

“Is it not, Petal?” he asked. 

“I missed talking to you.” she told him, moving toward him herself now. “I missed your voice, and I missed just sitting with you out in the garden… I missed… you.”

Lucien just looked at her, hoping that he wasn’t having some kind of hallucination. “I’ve missed you as well.” He said gently as Elain reached him. 

“I wanted you to come back…” she was looking up at him and Lucien couldn’t help but lift a hand to her, tucking a lock of her golden brown hair back over her shoulder. 

“I-” Lucien forgot what he had been about to say when Elain suddenly threw herself at him, her arms wrapping around his neck as she tugged him down to kiss him. In an instant, he had wrapped his own arms around her waist, lifting her as he straightened again. Surprise filled him when she pressed him to deepen the kiss and he allowed her to do as she wished. The desperation and desire that he could feel, both through the kiss and the bond, took Lucien’s breath away, and he had never been happier.


	47. Chapter Forty-Seven

**Chapter 47**

Nothing happened the following day. At least, nothing that Elain found particularly interesting. She had sat with her sisters all morning, trying to see something that would enable them to try and break the curse on Vassa, but nothing came. 

“Do you think,” Nesta murmured to her, so that Feyre wouldn’t hear, “that you’re not seeing anything because you don’t want to help her?”

Elain flicked a glance at her sister. “No.” she replied, “I would help break her curse if I could…” Nesta just tilted her head, like she wasn’t quite sure and Elain closed her eyes, trying to picture the redheaded queen again. She didn’t really know what she was doing, so she had no clue if what she was trying to achieve was even possible. Usually, the things she had seen had just come to her unbidden. 

Lucien had told her that seers could train themselves and hone their gifts if they studied at it. He had told her about vast libraries in places like the Day Court, where it might be possible for her to learn more about her abilities. She added that to the list of things she wished to see when they visited.

“Still nothing?” Feyre asked and Elain fell back against her chair with a sigh.

“I can’t.” 

“Maybe we will try again later.”

Elain had left her sisters to their own tasks and taken herself off outside to explore the gardens. She had taken the little book that Lucien had given her in case she found anything worth making note of, but everything she found was pretty standard. Even the gardens here didn’t compare to the ones she had become accustomed to in Prythian. As Lucien had disappeared off somewhere with Rhys and Mor, Elain had wandered back inside by lunch, and had then decided to spend the rest of the afternoon in her room reading.

It was about an hour after dark when they were called down for dinner, and she cast one last glance at herself in the mirror. Sweeping her hair over one shoulder, Elain straightened herself before she left her room. She hoped that Lucien had returned as she hadn’t seen him all day. She hadn’t seen him since he had walked her to her door the previous night and then disappeared off to his own room, and she knew that they still needed to talk. They hadn’t said much last night after she had kissed him. He had simply pulled her closer, lifting her to himself as he returned her kiss. She had been able to feel how pleased he had been and, when she’d finally broken the kiss, he had held onto her for a little longer before he had set her back on her feet. They had then spent a little time walking back to the eastern corridors of the manor where he had bid her goodnight at her door.

Elain was less than thrilled when she came across Vassa just outside the doors to the dining room. Nesta was standing off to the side with Feyre as they all waited for the final announcement that dinner was to be served. 

“You look rested.” Feyre said, her eyes sliding over Elain. 

“I had a relaxing afternoon reading.” Elain replied, smiling at her sisters.

“That must have been nice.” Vassa’s dark voice reached Elain and she glanced at the queen over her shoulder. 

“When is it that you become human?” Nesta asked, “Is it sunset, or a particular time?”

“Sunset.” Vassa muttered, her hands coming to rest on her hips. Nesta just nodded, before turning back to Elain, not bothering to answer the other woman still watching them.

Elain blinked. She understood her own aversion to the titian haired queen; it was pure jealousy and insecurity over her relationship with Lucien. She wasn’t sure why Nesta didn’t like her, however. She suspected it was Vassa’s relationship with their father, but she hadn’t actually asked her sister if that was the truth of it. Nesta would undoubtedly deny it anyway.

“I take it you found nothing helpful today?” Vassa moved closer, and Elain looked to Feyre who was shaking her head.

“No, Sorry.”

“Did Lucien and the others return yet?” The queen asked, “I haven’t seen anyone since I… changed.”

“Rhys was just getting back as I left our room.” Feyre said, “They’ll be down as soon as they’ve cleaned up.”

“Oh, wonderful.” Vassa’s hands smoothed down her midnight blue dress, stroking down over her breasts and moving lower across her abdomen. Elain tried to keep her face neutral as she watched the display.

“… and what do you need them for?” the words slipped out of Elain’s mouth before she could stop herself. 

“I’m sure I could think of a few things.” Vassa’s voice was a simper and Elain’s heart began to thump harder in her chest. “Lucien is so very good at so many things…”

Taking a step toward the queen, Elain clenched her hands at her sides. She was aware of Nesta taking a step with her, her sister’s eyes following her every move. Staring at Vassa, however, Elain narrowed her eyes. “You can’t have him.”

Vassa looked amused, and she laughed, tossing her vibrant hair over one slim shoulder. “And why not?” She asked, blue eyes raking over Elain. “He’s wasted on a female who doesn’t want him, and wont claim him.” Biting back a snarl, Elain just stared at Vassa. The queen smirked, her hands moving over her beautiful dress again, adjusting her skirts around her. “I’d put him to good use, that’s for sure.”

“He is not to be _used_.” Barely controlled rage simmered behind Elain’s words, but Vassa gave a light laugh and turned toward the double doors into the dining room as they swung open.

“Find your place cards.” Vassa said, sweeping into the room and heading for the centre of the long table, clearly aware of where her place was to be.

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” Elain muttered, earning herself a wide-eyed look from Nesta as Mor strode toward them up the hallway.

“Did you… just… claim him?” Feyre asked, evidently trying to supress her laughter. Elain flicked a glance at her younger sister before giving a half shrug.

“Just… want her to… stop…” She replied, not knowing how to further explain her reactions to what Vassa had said. She still needed to speak to Lucien. They needed to sort everything out and discuss what had happened while they had been apart. Elain didn’t even know where he had been, and she wanted to know.

“Did she really give us assigned seating?” Mor asked, coming to stand with the sisters by the door. 

“Looks like it.” Feyre replied. “…let’s see where we are.”

Elain nodded and followed her sisters into the hall, Mor following along on their heels. Feyre found her place quickly, sitting herself down beside Vassa, and telling them all that Rhys’ spot was on her other side. Mor sank down at one end of the table, apparently pleased that she was within easy reach of a bottle of red wine, and Elain walked along the table with Nesta, eventually finding her name next to her sister’s at the other end. She had a moment of relief that she wasn’t really anywhere near Vassa until she sank into her seat and then noticed that while Nesta was on her left, Jurian’s name was sitting to her right. When Elain frowned and noticed the empty seat beside Vassa, she glanced over to see the queen’s bright blue eyes looking her way. Elain realised just whose name was sitting there beside the redheaded woman. Vassa smiled at her.


	48. Chapter Forty-Eight

**Chapter 48**

Slipping his green jacket on, Lucien fastened it as quickly as he was able. He knew that the others had gone down for dinner just as he had been hurrying back into his room. A bath had been required and he had washed as swiftly as he could. Dinner would likely well and truly have begun by the time that he got downstairs and he wanted to join everyone else as soon as possible. It wasn’t that he was particularly worried about dinner, even though he was hungry, but he wanted to see Elain.

It had been incredibly difficult to drop her at her door the previous night and then return to his own room. But, Lucien had forced himself to walk away. He knew that Elain would likely have enough going through her mind after what had gone on in the maze when she had found him out there trying to get away from Vassa. She had then admitted to him that it wasn’t just the bond that had made her miss him before she had quite literally thrown herself at him, tugging him down into a kiss. If he were being honest with himself, Lucien had wanted nothing more than to take her back to his own room and show her exactly how much he had missed her, but he had known that would not have been the honourable thing to do. Knowing Elain, he was certain that she would need time to go over everything that had happened and she would need the space to process it. He had decided to give it to her before they spoke further. Today had been far too busy, however. Having left early with Rhys and Mor, Lucien had not had the time to find Elain at all. She was down there now, however, and he wanted to get to her.

Pushing his sleeves up his forearms, Lucien strode for the door and out into the hallway. Something was sliding down the bond toward him and Lucien quickened his step when he realised that Elain was furious. By the time he had reached the stairs, that feeling had turned to doubt and helplessness and he frowned. He didn’t know whatever it was that had been done to her, but he would find out.

Gritting his teeth when he realised that it probably had something to do with Vassa, he resolved himself to having to do something about it. Vassa was stubborn and not afraid to do whatever it took to achieve her goals, and if she had decided that she wanted him, Lucien had no doubt that she would make that clear to Elain. Having seen that fire in Elain when she had come for him in the maze the previous night, however; Lucien was certain that his mate would be able to handle anything Vassa threw at her.

*

Elain felt Lucien the moment he walked into the dining room. Sitting straighter in her chair, she twisted around to watch as he approached the table. When he met her eyes, she smiled at him, her blood heating as he returned her smile without hesitation. “Good evening, Petal.” He just about purred in Elain’s ear as he bent over the back of her chair and pressed his lips to her cheek. Elain felt herself blush, and bit her lip as just about every pair of eyes at the table turned her way. She looked away from them and back up at Lucien who began pulling the chair out beside her. 

“Oh, Lucien.” Vassa put in, “Your place card is over here… That’s Jurian’s spot.”

“Hm.” Lucien reached forward and picked up the small piece of cardboard with Jurian’s name on it. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked at it for a moment, his expression blank. “We don’t need to be so formal.” He said, “It’s just us here…” He tossed the place card carelessly into the middle of the table before dropping casually down into the chair, his hand sliding onto Elain’s knee as he smiled at her again. “Did you have a pleasing day?” he asked, his voice low enough that nobody but Elain would have heard him. 

Sparing a single glance for Vassa, Elain noticed the queen’s displeased expression and knew that the other woman was irritated by the fact that Lucien hadn’t seated himself where she had wanted him, and then he had deliberately cut everyone else out of the conversation by speaking to Elain so quietly. “Petal?” he asked, a finger tracing gently down Elain’s cheek.  
Elain turned her head to meet his eyes. “It was nice.” She said, “I spent the afternoon reading.”

“I have another book you will like.” He told her softly, and Elain’s eyes dropped to where Lucien’s fingers were tracing the skin of her wrist before moving down her hand. When his fingers slid between hers, Elain looked back up at his face. “I finished it last night…”

“I finished all of the other ones you gave me.” She told him and he raised an eyebrow. 

“Did you?”

“I liked them all.”

Lucien squeezed Elain’s hand gently. “I am pleased to hear that…”

She wanted to touch him. The thought shot through Elain fast enough that her breath caught in her throat and she just looked at him. She wanted to lift her hand and touch his hair or caress his cheek, she wanted to run her fingers down his scar, and those thoughts were completely inappropriate for the dinner table. Smiling gently, she lowered her gaze, trying to focus on the fact that he still held her hand in his and that was enough.

They both looked up when large bowls of soup were placed in front of them. Lucien released her hand to pick up his spoon, and Elain tried not to feel the disappointment. Beside her, Nesta made a small noise that suggested to Elain that her sister knew exactly what she had been thinking and she turned her head to meet those clever blue-grey eyes. “Nesta?” she murmured. Nesta’s eyes moved across Elain’s face before sliding past her toward Lucien. “Nes?”

“Interesting.” Nesta breathed, meeting Elain’s eyes again. Elain raised an eyebrow at her but her sister just gave her the tiniest of smiles before looking back down at her own soup. 

Making sure that she kept her eyes averted from Vassa, Elain quietly ate her own soup as she listened to the conversations moving around the table. It seemed that, with Vassa only able to take her human form at night, much of the manor’s happenings occurred after sundown. After dinner there was to be a small meeting in one of the sitting rooms, and Feyre was going to go through anything they had learned that morning with Vassa so that the queen was up to date. The chatter died down when Jurian strode into the room and to the empty chair beside Vassa. 

“All settled.” He said to Vassa as he sank down and picked up his spoon. “In the room on the west corridor, as you instructed.”

“Thank you.” Vassa’s muttered voice replied. Despite herself, Elain’s eyes shifted toward the redheaded queen. Vassa’s own blue eyes were directed her way before shifting to Lucien, and irritation flickered through Elain. Tightening her hand on her spoon as her eyes went back to her soup, Elain wished she could somehow block Vassa’s gaze as possessiveness flooded her. She wondered when she had begun to think of Lucien as ‘hers’, but she had. It had to have been a long time ago, she figured, because she certainly had thought of him as hers back in the Autumn Court. Maybe it had been when they had visited Spring? But then, Elain thought back to when Lucien had first left the Night Court to search for Vassa when she had been missing before the war. That morning he had left, she had felt it. She felt as if she had lost something. Even then, she realised, she had thought of him as hers. Her eyes sliding back to Vassa, Elain made the decision that she was not going to let the woman anywhere near her Lucien again. Elain had killed the King of Hybern and she was not weak. If Vassa thought she was going to get at Lucien, she was going to have to go through Elain to do it.

Shocked at her own thoughts, Elain chewed gently on her lower lip. Those were not thoughts that she was familiar with at all. She was not a confrontational person, and it confused her that she would think that way. Was it the bond? Was that where her jealousy and possessiveness had come from? Or, she wondered, was it just her?

Glancing around the table, Elain tried to figure out a way to sort her thoughts. As dinner came to a close, she looked at Mor. 

When the dining room began to empty, Elain got to her feet and followed Mor out into the hallway. “Hey…” She called, hurrying up the stairs to catch up to her and Mor turned to look at her, a questioning look on her beautiful face. 

“Elain?”

“Your gift is truth.” Elain said, and Mor nodded.

“Yes.” She agreed, clearly confused.

Taking a deep breath, Elain bounced on the balls of her feet, trying to draw any scraps of courage she could muster. “… I love Lucien Vanserra.” The words came out slightly more defiantly than she had intended, but she didn’t take her eyes off of Mor for a second.

Mor’s gaze sharpened, “You love Lucien Vanserra.” She repeated, her head tilting, sending her blonde hair cascading over one of her shoulders, as a half-smile quirked the side of her lips before she purred a soft “Truth.”


	49. Chapter Forty-Nine

**Chapter 49**

_I love Lucien Vanserra. I love Lucien Vanserra. I love Lucien Vanserra._ Elain paced back and forth in her room, the thought running through her mind over and over again as she ran a hand through her hair. She hadn’t known what to do after Mor had smiled at her and continued up the stairs, leaving her standing there to take in the confirmation of her confession. Needing a moment to consider, Elain had hurried up to her own room where she had begun to pace back and forth.

She supposed she had known, but to hear it confirmed was something else. Letting out a breath, Elain caught sight of her reflection and moved closer to the mirror. Running her hands through her hair had completely messed it up, and she bent to her vanity to pick up her hairbrush in order to fix it. Carefully, she released her hair and pulled the brush through it, smoothing all of the tangles. She had to go back downstairs. She had to find Lucien and tell him. He had to have been wondering why she had hurried out of the dining room without a word, and she didn’t want him to think that she had been running away from him. Setting her brush aside, Elain loosely braided her hair once more before turning away from the mirror and heading back downstairs. She had to tell him.

By the time she got back to the dining room, it was empty. Spinning around, Elain tried to remember which of the nearby rooms they would have gone to. She didn’t think that Lucien would have gone with Feyre and Nesta to talk to Vassa, and she doubted that he had gone upstairs to bed already, especially without letting her know, so he had to be in whichever of the other sitting rooms had been opened for their use. Moving up the hallway, Elain tried to listen for his heart, letting the bond guide her. She was more than a little pleased when she pushed open a door toward the end of the hallway and found him inside, standing before a roaring fire. 

“Everything okay, Petal?” he asked, turning his head to look at her. Elain watched the way the fire made his hair shimmer, looking like molten metal in the flickering light and she smiled. 

“Would it not be?”

“You got out of there pretty quickly.”

“I had to speak with Mor.”

She heard his metallic eye click and he turned to face her properly. “Did you?”

“Yes.” Elain crossed the room to him quickly, coming to a stop when he was just out of reach. She didn’t know how to do this. It wasn’t something you could just blurt out. Lucien’s eyes, both russet and golden, moved across her face and he smiled gently at her. She could tell that he knew she had something to say to him and that she was struggling to work out how. When he lifted a hand, holding it out until she placed one of her own in his, she knew that he was going to give her the time she needed to work it out. He wasn’t going to push her or try and pressure her into just saying it, and she relaxed a little.

“Do you want to sit, Petal?” he asked, drawing her toward the long couch before the fire. Elain nodded and moved with him, sinking down onto the plush cushions beside him. Lucien lifted his other hand, holding hers with both of his, and he slowly began to massage her hand. Elain let out a soft groan as she just about melted.

“Oh, that’s not fair.” She breathed. 

“What’s not fair?” the smirk he gave her told her he knew exactly what he was doing. Elain just met his eyes, lifting her other hand to give to him so he could do the same to it as well. Lucien grinned widely, and Elain couldn’t look away.

She watched his face, entranced, as he continued to massage her hands, his own eyes on what he was doing. Lucien’s touch warm and firm and Elain found herself inching toward him. He looked up at her when her knee met his and she smiled at him, opening her mouth to say literally anything to him. He grinned at her again, his fingers lacing through hers, and Elain smiled back. 

Before she could say anything, however, the door opened again and she bit back a groan. She saw Lucien glance over the couch before anger flashed across his face and Elain tilted her head, looking around at whoever had just come through the door herself. Her heart hit her stomach when she saw Graysen striding across the room. Getting to her feet, Elain backed away from Graysen as he approached the fire. She saw him hesitate when he saw her, and his face went hard, his lip twisting as his blue eyes moved over her.

Lucien got slowly to his feet, and Elain watched him also edge away from Graysen, his russet and gold eyes flicking her way for a moment. 

“I… I didn’t know you were here.” Elain said softly, flinching when hostility was evident in Graysen’s eyes when he looked at her. 

“The manor does belong to my family…” his voice held an edge that he had never used to use with her and Elain just nodded silently, twisting her hands together in front of her.

“I… know…”

“I’m sure you do.” He muttered, and Elain looked at him, wondering what that meant. Hurt lanced through her as her eyes moved over his tall, solid frame, and caught on the disgust on his handsome face. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lucien’s head turn her way, and she realised that he had felt her hurt. 

“I don’t know what you mean.” She said, looking at Graysen again.

Graysen’s lip curled at he looked at her. “She should have told me who was here before I arrived.” He said, his eyes looking Elain over from head to foot. She took a step back, finding herself against a table. “I would have gone anywhere else.”

“Graysen…” she murmured, not sure her voice would work properly.

“Don’t say my name again.” Disgust dripped from Graysen’s words, and Elain felt tears welling in her eyes. “I don’t want to hear you talk at all.”

“… don’t speak to her like that.” Lucien growled, and Elain could feel the barely controlled rage swirling within him. She could see the stiff way in which he was holding himself, and knew that he was very near the edge of losing that control.

Graysen let out a huff, and Elain’s eyes went back to him. She watched as he looked from her to Lucien and back again, the sneer spreading further across his face. “So,” he spat, “you refused to spread your legs for me, but you have for _that_?”

Elain went still, but Lucien spoke then. “High Fae are far superior in that regard,” his voice held a note of arrogance Elain knew would piss Graysen off, “… and every other regard.” Lucien held himself straighter when Graysen sneered at him before blue eyes turned on Elain again. 

“It’s like fucking an animal.” Graysen snapped. Tears fell from Elain’s eyes, trailing her cheeks, and she heard Lucien growl in response to her tears. Graysen just smirked at the sound. “You see?” he asked, stalking toward her, “Do you like fucking animals?” he grabbed Elain when he reached her, turning her around and bending her over the table, “But then, you’re an animal now, too… I bet you don’t care who mounts you.”

Flames erupted around them and Graysen gave a startled cry, releasing Elain who scrambled away from him sobbing. She saw Graysen frantically slapping at his sleeves trying to put out the flames which had clung to his coat, before Lucien entered her view. Flames flickered across his hands, licking up his forearms as he advanced on Graysen, and Elain threw herself in front of her mate, her hands coming up to press against his chest. 

“Don’t…” she breathed, looking up at him. His russet eye burned nearly as fiercely as his hair and he looked confused as he looked back down at her. Elain refused to move, her hands pressing him back. Lucien looked over her head at Graysen again before looking back down to meet Elain’s eyes. “Please…” she said, knowing that she had to stop him. Not out of any desire to protect Graysen, but to prevent Lucien from doing something he would probably regret later. “Lucien…” she said softly, “Please… take me upstairs…” His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he frowned and then he nodded, the flames vanishing from his hands.

“Alright…” his voice was barely more than a whisper as he took Elain’s hand. 

She went with him, allowing Lucien to draw her toward the door. As they slipped out into the hallway, Elain glanced back over her shoulder only once. Graysen still watched them, his face pale and his eyes wide, as his singed coat still smoked gently and, as the door swung closed, Elain realised that she didn’t care.


	50. Chapter Fifty

**Chapter 50**

Lucien took Elain upstairs, his hand holding firmly on to hers. He headed for his room, not trusting himself if she were out of his sight. His heart was thundering in his chest, his blood racing in his ears, and he was still angry. He should have killed that mortal son of a whore. The prick deserved to be ripped apart.

When he shoved his door open, Elain followed him into the room. Lucien sent a thought at the fireplace, sending the fire roaring to life and then he turned to look at his mate, her hand still in his. Her eyes were still red and puffy from her tears, and he could still see the evidence of where those tears had fallen. Taking a step closer, Lucien lifted Elain’s hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles gently. “Are you alright, Petal?” he asked, and she nodded. Elain’s dark eyes lifted to meet his gaze as she moved closer, going up on her toes to wrap her arms around him and Lucien bent to lift her to himself. As she tightened her arms around his neck, he felt her press her face into his hair, and he began to calm down. 

After a few moments, Lucien set Elain back down on her feet and she let him go. He felt her hands slide around to rest on his shoulders as she looked up into his eyes again. One of her hands came up as she traced her fingers down his scar, and Lucien shivered. Elain let that hand fall to his chest, resting over his heart, and he knew that she was listening to it beating. “Do you feel better?” she asked softly and Lucien slid an arm around her waist.

“Me?” he asked, bringing his free hand up to her cheek. Tracing his thumb carefully beneath one of her eyes, her met her gaze steadily. “I was concerned about you.”

“I’m alright.” She murmured, and he watched her brown eyes move back and forth across his face. 

“… you were going to marry that … man.”

“Yes.” Elain held his eyes, not looking away for a moment. Lucien shook his head, hating to think what her life would have been like with that piece of shit. “He was never like that with me… before…” Letting out a sigh, Lucien supposed he probably wouldn’t have been until after they were married and she had no way of getting away from him. 

“I wanted to kill him.”

This time Elain shook her head. “You would have regretted it.”

“Maybe.” He said softly, his hand moving from her cheek up into her hair. “Thank you for stopping me.” He supposed that he did not want to be the one who had killed somebody she had once been in love with. If she was to love him, he did not need that identity in her mind. “… you didn’t get burned, did you?” he looked her over quickly, but she shook her head.

Taking both of her hands, Lucien drew her toward his bed, sinking down to sit on the edge. “Are you going to massage me again?” she asked, and he grinned when he saw her smiling at him. 

“You liked that, did you?”

“I think you know that I did.”

“Indeed.” He began rubbing small circles into her hands with his thumbs, “I think I’m getting pretty good at determining what you like…” Lucien watched Elain blush at those words, and he grinned again.

“I liked you ignoring Vassa’s stupid assigned seating at dinner.” She said then, and Lucien tilted his head. 

“I wasn’t about to let Jurian have the best spot at the table.” He replied and Elain shook her head. 

“She wanted you next to her.” Elain’s voice was a little shaky and Lucien ran a hand up her arm, shifting closer. 

“I didn’t want to be next to her.”

“She’s not going to stop.” Elain sounded worried and Lucien ran his hand up and down her arm, trying to be reassuring. 

“It doesn’t matter, Petal.” He said, “No matter what she wants, I won’t ever want her.”

“…She’s a queen…”

Lucien blinked, disbelief coursing through him. “And you…” he murmured, bending to be able to press his lips gently to hers, “… are my mate.” His fingers slid back into Elain’s hair as she leaned into him, and he gently tilted her face up to him a little more, kissing her again. It didn’t take long before Elain’s hands slid up his chest, fisting handfuls of his jacket and he lifted his head to smile at her. “… you liked that, too.”

“Yes.” Her voice was soft, and Lucien would have bet that if he had have been able to hear her heart, it would have been pounding. He watched as she clearly thought about what he had said, and her uncertainty seemed to disappear. After a moment, she smiled at him, bringing her fingers up to trace over his scar as she had earlier. Lucien didn’t know why she liked to touch it, and he had never let anyone else do so, but he enjoyed her gentle hands on him and he liked the look in her eyes as she watched her fingers move over his face. “I almost wish Amarantha was still alive…” she breathed and Lucien just about flinched. 

“Why?” he asked, his stomach twisting at the thought.

“Because,” Elain murmured, her eyes following her fingers down his scar to his jaw again, “I would have liked to look into the eyes of the one who did this to you.” She met his gaze then, and Lucien could see something in her brown eyes that he had never seen before. Was that rage? 

*

When Elain’s fingers reached Lucien’s jaw she traced them slowly back into his hair. She watched him trying to read her, and she figured that he was trying to work out why she would have wanted anything to do with Amarantha. “She got what was coming to her.” He said after several moments, and satisfaction spread through Elain, her anger beginning to drain away.

“I’ve never really hated anyone before.” She told him, “But I hate her.” 

Lucien nodded and she felt his hand on her thigh. “I did as well. But mostly, I just feared her. We all did.” From what Elain had seen of Amarantha in the visions she had seen about what she had done to Lucien, she figured that was true.

“Who do you hate?” she asked after a moment and he raised an eyebrow, both his russet and golden eyes focused upon her face. 

“I hate a lot of people.” His voice was flat and Elain shook her head, her hand sliding down the back of his neck and around to rest on his shoulder. 

“Who do you hate not from the Autumn Court?” she clarified.

A funny expression passed across Lucien’s face for a moment and he looked away with a frown. Elain just watched his face, waiting for him to answer her. After he had drawn and released several slow breaths, his eyes returned to hers as he let out a sigh. “Ianthe.”

“…the… priestess?” Elain asked, feeling tears welling in her eyes that she could do nothing to deny. The one who had betrayed them to Hybern. Lucien nodded and she felt him shudder. Reaching out to him, Elain lay a hand on his forearm, feeling the hard corded muscles beneath his skin shift. “You hated her?” She could feel the loathing rolling off of Lucien in waves and she tilted her head. By all accounts from Feyre Ianthe had been insufferable and annoying, and obviously she had betrayed them resulting in what had happened with the cauldron, but Lucien’s reaction to the thought of her suggested something further.

“Yes.” He said, the muscles in his arm shifting beneath her hand as he clenched his fist. “I did.”

“Why?” she asked, “Because she betrayed us?” 

It was fear that hit Elain then down the bond and she frowned. Lucien had dropped his gaze and was looking now somewhere around her shoulder. She just watched his face as he lifted a hand and gently took hold of her thick braid, bringing it around over her shoulder, his fingers tracing it gently all the way to the end. “I hated her for several reasons.” He eventually said, his eyes still on her braid.

“Did she hurt you?”

Lucien continued to play with Elain’s braid and she watched him trying to work out what to say. “Yes.” Fear and anxiety swirled around one another as they slid down the bond toward her, and Elain wondered what the priestess had done to produce such a reaction.


	51. Chapter Fifty-One

**Chapter 51**

Lucien was looking intently at the end of Elain’s braid as he ran it gently between his fingers. Elain watched him, still able to feel the fear and anxiety coming off of him. He hadn’t looked away from her braid since she had asked him why he hated Ianthe, and she was growing more and more concerned. “Lucien?” she asked softly, her hand trailing down his arm. 

“Yes?”

Elain watched his face, noting that he kept his eyes on her braid as he held it carefully. “Tell me what Ianthe did…”

He let out a soft huff, lifting his eyes to hers for a moment. “She… liked the idea of mixing her bloodline with mine.”

“What?” Elain frowned, looking at him. Lucien nodded slowly. 

“She was … quite persistent.” 

“Did you sleep with her?”

“Ah…”

Horror coiled through Elain as she stared at him. Lucien released her braid, his golden eye whirring as he focused on her face again. “I…”

“You did.”

“Not once I met you.” His words came out rushed, and it took Elain a moment to understand. “I swear.”

“But you did before…?”

He made a face, and Elain just waited for his response. “Do you know what Calanmai is?” he asked and she shook her head. “It involves a rite during which the High Lord allows powerful magic to enter him.” Lucien spoke softly, and Elain struggled to focus on what he was saying and not on the fact that he had apparently slept with that awful priestess. “During the rite he is forced by that magic to seek out the Maiden.”

“And bed her?”

Lucien nodded once. “This allows the release of that magic, which ensures that crops will grow for the next year…” his eyes moved back and forth across her face. “It’s highly important that the Rite is completed…”

“And that’s what you did?”

“Yes.”

“But… you’re not a High Lord.”

Lucien made another face. “Tamlin… refused… to complete the Rite. He was … upset… that Feyre was gone.”

“So you did it?”

“I did.”

“… you and Ianthe?”

Lucien dropped his gaze again, and Elain could feel embarrassment and disgust coming from him. “Yes.” He murmured, “She ensured that she was the one I took into that cave…”

“You didn’t have a choice?”

He shook his head and Elain reached out to him, laying her hand gently over his. She jumped then as her ears began to ring in that familiar way she had begun to become accustomed to.

_  
Drums pounded and Lucien gasped as bright light surrounded him and Elain could feel the sting as it touched his skin. She watched as it seemed to wrap around him and he fell to his knees, his ruby hair falling forward and covering his face. Knowing she couldn’t do anything, Elain took a concerned step toward him all the same. A moment later the light vanished, appearing to disappear into Lucien and, when he lifted his head, Elain was the one who gasped. He was resplendent, glowing from within, and the fire in his russet eye was brighter than she had ever seen it._

_He was on his feet in an instant, stalking toward the fire by the nearby cave and Elain hurried to follow him. There were female faeries of all kinds waiting by the entrance, but Ianthe stood before them all, blocking them from view as she presented herself and it was more than clear to Elain that that had been the priestess’ intention. Lucien barely paused for a second before he had seized Ianthe’s arm and dragged her into the cave. Elain’s stomach twisted, but she followed, the sound of drums growing louder around her._

_By the time she caught up, she found Lucien and Ianthe in a dimply lit cavern. Fire flickered around on the walls, casting lengthy dancing shadows, and they stood by a raised dais sporting a long stone alter. Stumbling forward, Elain watched as Ianthe grinned widely at Lucien, telling him how pleased she was that he had chosen her. Lucien stalked toward the priestess and Ianthe reached out, untucking the white shirt that he wore. She continued to talk about how she knew the Rite would be successful with the two of them taking part, but Elain could not take her eyes off of Lucien. His expression was feral and his eyes alight. The magic had turned him wild and she didn’t think she had ever seen that expression on his face before. Ianthe didn’t appear to have noticed as she monologued, but she gave a small startled gasp when he suddenly reached out and ripped her dress from her body._

_Lucien stalked toward Ianthe who slowly began to back toward the dais, her pretty blue eyes now on his face. Elain supposed the priestess had finally noticed the feral look in his eyes, and was wondering about her choices in coming here. Lucien undid his pants as he walked, his skin still glowing with all of that magic he had taken into himself._

_Elain just watched, unable to look away, as Ianthe hit the alter and had nowhere else to go. Lucien reached her and shed his shirt, tossing it aside as he stared down at the blonde female before him. Ianthe reached out, trying to help him remove his pants, but Lucien brushed her hands away before removing them himself. When he stood straight to look at Ianthe again, Elain was sure she saw the priestess shudder._

_“Finally…” Ianthe said, her voice steadier than Elain would have expected it to be judging by how wide her blue eyes were. “Didn’t I tell you this would happen…?”_

_Lucien’s only response was to grab a handful of Ianthe’s blonde hair. He used it to turn her around before bending her over the alter. Watching, Elain could barely swallow, and she couldn’t force her eyes to look anywhere else as Lucien held Ianthe in place with that handful of her hair, his other hand on her lower back as he forced her legs apart with one of his own._

_The drums seemed to grow louder, increasing in tempo, as Ianthe appeared to spread herself eagerly. Elain watched, knowing that she couldn’t do anything to stop it. Her heart was pounding almost painfully in her chest and her stomach was twisting and churning enough that she thought she might be sick. She really didn’t want to see this, and was thankful that from where she was standing all she could see was Lucien’s back as he bent a little into a better position before coming back up with a hard thrust. Ianthe’s high pitched cry echoed around the cavern and Elain closed her eyes, both hands coming up over her mouth. She had no idea why she was being shown this. The other visions she had seen of Lucien all had a purpose. They had helped her to better understand him and who he had become, but this? There was no reason for her to see this._

_Turning, Elain hurried back toward the entrance to the cavern, but found herself unable to go any further. That made sense, she thought, as this was Lucien’s memory. She was stuck where he was, which meant remaining where she could see and hear everything going on up on that dais. With a whimper, Elain glanced back at Lucien and Ianthe, her breath catching at the sight of Lucien yanking the priestess back by her hair as he fucked her with what appeared to be brutal force. Harsh grunting sounds echoed around the cavern, broken every so often by Ianthe’s cries, and Elain turned away again, bringing her hands up over her ears._

_Looking for another option, Elain moved around the cavern, hoping there was somewhere else she could escape to, but that proved fruitless. Ianthe’s high pitched cries turned to shrieks then and Elain couldn’t help but cast her gaze toward the dais again. She watched, unable to help herself, as Lucien dragged the priestess off of the alter and threw her to the ground. The blonde had only just lifted herself onto her hands before he was on her again, lifting her hips and thrusting himself between her thighs once more. When one of Lucien’s hands seized a hold of that long hair again, yanking her head back, Elain could clearly see the priestess’ expression and she knew without doubt that this was exactly what the blonde had wanted. Lucien yanked her back again before throwing her forward as his hands went back to her hips and he continued to fuck Ianthe on the floor with unrestrained violence while he snarled viciously and Ianthe cried out with delight and pleasure._

_Feeling a tug, Elain blinked, her vision shifting before it changed altogether. Ianthe now sat atop Lucien who was on his back on the floor as the priestess rode him, her hands reaching up into her own hair as she moved, her cries still echoing around the cavern. Elain turned away as she felt another tug and the cavern disappeared altogether.  
_

“NO!” Lucien leaped to his feet and moved away from Elain on the bed. He strode to the window, dragging his fingers through his hair. “I didn’t want you to see that!” She heard a slight hitch in his voice and got to her own feet, moving slowly toward him.

“Did you just pull me out of that vision?” she asked, wondering if he’d fought what the bond was showing her.

“I didn’t want you to see it…” his voice was soft now, but Elain could feel panic and embarrassment coming from him. Silently, she continued to move toward him at the window where she wrapped her arms around him from behind, pressing herself into his back. “That wasn’t me…” he murmured and Elain felt his hesitant hand over hers against his chest. “I’m not like that… That wasn’t me…” She knew that he was referring to the violence of what she had just witnessed and Elain nodded her head against him. 

“I know.” She breathed, tightening her arms around him. “It was that magic you took into yourself. I saw it.”

“Yes…” Lucien’s voice shook slightly, and she felt him draw a slow breath. “The Rite is not for lovemaking.”


	52. Chapter Fifty-Two

**Chapter 52**

They stood in silence for several minutes, with Elain having pressed her cheek firmly to Lucien’s back as she listened to his breathing slow and he began to calm down. She hadn’t intended to let herself into that memory he so clearly despised and she felt like she had intruded on something he shouldn’t have had to show anybody if he didn’t wish to. She told him as much and both of his hands came to settle over hers against his chest. 

“I know you didn’t mean to.” He replied, his fingers caressing the backs of her hands.

“I can feel how ashamed you are…” Elain murmured, and she felt him straighten slightly at her words. “But I don’t understand why…”

“I…”

When he paused Elain went on. “Was it because of how the magic made you act?” she asked, “You wouldn’t have touched her otherwise… would you?”

“No.” he said softly, but Elain felt something unspoken follow that response. She closed her eyes, holding on to him and waiting for him to continue. “I tried to avoid her… Even after Feyre came back to the Spring Court after you…” his fingers laced with hers, “Even telling her I was a mated male didn’t make her back off.” Elain just listened, noticing the disgust building within him again. “She kept trying and I kept avoiding her until she tricked me the day Feyre intended to leave.” The sudden image of Lucien shackled with his pants undone and his back against a tree in the forest flashed before Elain’s eyes and she gasped. “… if Feyre hadn’t found us and released me…” He fell silent and Elain tightened her arms around him again, pressing a kiss to his back.

“By the Cauldron.” She murmured, “Lucien, this is not something for which you should feel ashamed. That evil bitch assaulted you.”

“And I couldn’t stop her.”

Elain shook her head, pressing her forehead into his back. “Was this why you didn’t want me to know?”

“Partly.” He replied, “I didn’t want it to influence your image of me…” she shook her head again and he went on, “I didn’t want you to think less of me; for not being able to stop her in that forest, and for what I did with her in that cave…”

“It doesn’t.” she murmured, “It never would.”

“Are you sure?”

“She forced herself on you.” She said firmly, “She is the one who should have been ashamed. That was unforgivable. That’s another reason that I wanted you to have the choice to accept the bond.” She went on, “It was forced on you as much as it was on me. I didn’t want to do that to you.” She pressed her lips to his back again and she felt his hands tighten on hers over his chest.

“I would choose you a thousand times over.” He breathed, and Elain felt his words vibrate through him. He turned then and Elain didn’t move away, her hands sliding to his waist. “A thousand times.” He said again.

Elain looked up at Lucien, thinking about her possessiveness lately, and deciding that she never wanted anyone else to ever touch him. Her eyes moved across his handsome face, across his scar and back up to his eyes, both russet and golden. “…are you mine?” she asked, her breath coming more quickly. 

“Without question.”

Elain nodded, her eyes still on his face. “Then I’m yours.”

Lucien didn’t so much as blink for several moments, but she heard his heart begin to beat more quickly and then a wide smile spread across his face and relief rushed down the bond to wash over her. Fire erupted in his gaze as he looked down at her and both of his hands came up to gently cup her face. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as Lucien just looked at her, his eyes seemingly trying to take in every detail of her face and Elain managed a small smile at him before he’d bent to kiss her, turning to press her back against the window frame as his lips moved carefully against hers. 

The kiss was slow and sweet and Elain found her hands tightening on handfuls of Lucien’s jacket at he pressed closer. When he began to lick teasingly at her, Elain parted her lips for him, allowing him to deepen the kiss and then she realised that her hands had come up to pull his jacket open. A moment later she was pushing it off of his shoulders and then he had shrugged out of it, tossing it aside before his hands were on her again, pressing her more firmly into the window frame as her own hands slid up his chest, her nails scratching gently at his shirt. Lucien gave a soft groan into the kiss and then his hands had slid around Elain, drawing her to himself and lifting her from the floor as he turned, carrying her across the room.

Elain slid both of her hands up the back of Lucien’s neck and into his crimson hair when he sank down onto his bed, holding her in his lap. She lifted her head to meet his eyes, her breath coming in small gasps, as she met that fire still in his gaze. “I love you.” She told him, holding her breath then as she watched him take in her words. She hadn’t needed Mor to tell her that was the truth, she could feel the reality of it within herself as she had said the words to him. All she had needed to do was to tell Lucien and the truth of it blossomed within her. 

Elain didn’t know what she had expected Lucien’s reaction to be. Perhaps she had expected him to smile or to kiss her, perhaps she had expected him to say it back, she wasn’t sure. She just watched his face however, as he lifted a trembling hand to her cheek, his thumb tracing her skin softly as his eyes flickered back and forth across her face. “Do you, Petal?”

“I do.” She murmured, her fingers carding through his hair as she gently pulled his head back sitting higher in his lap in order to be able to bring her lips down to his. Lucien’s warm hands slid down her back and Elain found herself pushing him back onto the bedspread, moving over him so that she could grin down at him. The look of awe that she received as he smiled up at her sent a bolt of confidence through her and she allowed one of her hands to shift to his waist, sliding up under his shirt along the smooth warm skin of his stomach.

Lucien let out a breathy groan at her touch and he lifted one of his hands to her cheek again, bringing her eyes back up to his face to meet his gaze. “And I love you.” 

Elain smiled and bent to kiss him, her hand still stroking appreciatively at his warm skin. “I’m glad.” She murmured against his lips, and she felt Lucien give a small laugh a moment before his arms wrapped around her and he rolled them so that she was beneath him on her back. Where Elain had been kneeling over Lucien, holding herself hovering above him, Lucien allowed his weight to settle over Elain, his heat sinking into her as he pressed her into the covers of the bed, pinned beneath him and able to feel every breath he took.

Sliding her hands up Lucien’s back, Elain dragged his shirt up until she could pull it over his head, grinning at him when his surprised eyes met hers. When he kissed her again, heat flared within her and her hands traced slowly over his back, appreciating his smooth skin which had gone from warm to hot within moments. Lifting her head to kiss him, Elain gasped as Lucien shifted her up the bed until she felt her head resting on one of the fine pillows, but then he had slid his tongue into her mouth and was licking teasingly at her again and she forgot all about it. 

Wrapping her legs around his waist, Elain allowed it all to wash over her. There was no clear distinction between her own desire and what she could feel of Lucien’s through the bond, but she didn’t care. She had pulled her own dress up as his hands skimmed up her thighs and then she was arching into him when one went between her legs. Somehow she had pulled the laces of his pants loose and was pushing at the waistband, scratching at his hips while trying to tug him closer at the same time. When both of Lucien’s hands then slid up her body again, Elain felt him press himself firmly against her and she couldn’t help lifting her hips slightly to meet him. Tightening her legs around his waist, she could feel his hard length and how much he wanted her now, both through the evidence pressed against her and through the bond.

“Elain…” he murmured, lips hot against her throat, and Elain gave a soft groan by way of response. Her hands ghosted up Lucien’s back as she felt his slide down to pin her hips to the bed as he began rocking against her. Liquid heat began to pool between Elain’s thighs and she couldn’t hold back a low moan when Lucien licked slowly at a sensitive hollow in her neck. She tried to move to meet him, but he still held her pinned, so she tugged gently at his hair until he lifted his head to kiss her properly again.

“Please…” she breathed, when he’d broken the kiss and returned his lips to her throat. She felt him shake his head, still moving against her. 

“This shouldn’t happen here…” he murmured, his breath hot against her ear. 

“Why?” Elain’s hands moved down his back again, and Lucien released her hips. 

“This place… some random bed…” he shook his head again, this time pressing a kiss to her cheek before lifting his head to meet her eyes. “It’s meaningless… and Nesta is probably already looking for you.”

“I don’t care.”

Lucien’s lips quirked in a smile. “I do.” He replied, hand coming gently to her cheek, “When I first have you,” he breathed, “I do not intend to be rushed…” he brushed his lips lightly against hers, “I aim to take all the time in the world,” the words were murmured into the kiss and heat flushed through Elain again. “and ensure that you enjoy every long second of it…”

Elain gave a soft whimper, wondering if it were possible for him to bring her to her edge with just his words, and the smirk that Lucien gave her then suggested that he probably could. “I-I…” she stuttered, not knowing what to say. “You think I should go back to my own room?” she asked, “Like this?” she still wanted him, couldn’t stop her hands tugging at him, couldn’t deny the need still coursing through her. He smirked at her again. 

“What sort of gentleman do you think I am?” he asked, one hand trailing his fingers down her side and then across her stomach, “To think I would leave a Lady so unsatisfied…?” Elain’s breath caught at his words and her eyes locked onto his, unable to look away from his hot gaze, when that hand dipped lower and went between her thighs again. She gasped, her own hand flying up to clutch at Lucien’s shoulder as his clever fingers sent shivers throughout her body and she spread her legs more widely for him. Her breath began to quicken and her heart raced to catch it and Elain could do nothing but clutch more tightly at Lucien, her eyes on his as he avidly watched her face until she came with a cry, her eyes sliding closed and her back arched as much as it could with his weight still atop her. Lucien continued what he had been doing with his fingers until Elain went still beneath him and opened her eyes to meet his again. 

“Fascinating.” He murmured, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

“What is?” her own voice was nothing more than a whisper as she fought to catch her breath. 

“Every expression you just made.” He replied, shifting his weight off her and to the side. “I didn’t get to see them last time…”

“Hm.” Elain supposed he probably wouldn’t have with is face between her thighs. If she hadn’t already been flushed, she might have blushed at the thought. “I’m glad that you enjoyed that…”

“Almost as much as you did.” He was smirking at her again and Elain leaned toward him, her hand coming to rest on his waist. 

“Then let me do something for you…” She felt the rush of excitement that reached her down the bond, but Lucien shook his head, taking her hand in his own. 

“Oh, Petal.” He said, voice gentle. “I look forward to that, but not here…” She blinked, looking at him. 

“I don’t want to be unfair.” She said. He’d given her her release, and she knew that he still needed his own. 

“Ah,” Lucien smiled at her and lifted her hand to his lips, kissing it gently. “I’m quite good at taking care of that myself.”

“You don’t need to.”

“I know.” He sat up, taking her with him. “But tonight I will.”

Footsteps sounded out in the hallway, and they both looked toward the door. “Everyone is going to bed.” Elain said softly and Lucien nodded. 

“Nesta will be looking for you.”

Sighing, Elain got to her feet, her legs a little shaky. The soft chuckle she heard from Lucien told her that he had noticed, and she threw a mock glare at him. He just winked at her as he made a show of settling back against the pillows and the headboard as he watched her, and Elain wanted nothing more than to climb back onto the bed. She had a quick mental image of herself straddling him and she turned away before he could see the look on her face that she was sure would betray her. “I’ll see you in the morning.” She murmured.

“What a delight that will be.” His voice held a teasing note and Elain smiled at him over her shoulder as she straightened her dress and strode for the door. As she slipped out into the hallway, she allowed herself one last glance at Lucien, still reclining on his bed and watching her, before she pulled the door closed and headed for her own room.


	53. Chapter Fifty-Three

**Chapter 53**

The moment the door closed after Elain, Lucien was off the bed and walking quickly into the bathroom. He set the tub to fill with cold water and had pulled his pants off a moment later, sighing with relief at finally being free of their tight constraints. Still able to feel hot desire pulsing through him, Lucien leaned against the edge of the tub as he took himself in his hand. A small moan escaped his lips before he even thought to silence it, and he didn’t even bother to hold in the next as he ran his hand over himself, his eyes sliding closed as he pictured Elain spread out beneath him. Going over the expressions that had crossed her face as he’d brought her to her fall earlier, Lucien imagined what it would be like to earn those expressions and more has he moved inside of her, hear her moaning his name as she clutched at him as he thrust deeper and deeper…

Lucien came with a cry, spilling himself into his hand and the washcloth he had grabbed at the last moment. When he’d caught his breath, he cleaned up quickly before moving back to the tub, turning the water off before he stepped into it, gritting his teeth against the cold water as he sank down to sit. Cold water was exactly what he needed. He’d let Elain go, but that didn’t mean that he hadn’t thought about following her. This was what he needed to cool off and settle down so that he would be able to put himself to bed and get whatever rest he was able to achieve. Slipping down, Lucien sank into the water until he was completely submerged. 

Holding his breath, Lucien tried to get a hold of himself, not coming up again until he had calmed down. He knew that he could have had Elain, right there on that bed. She had wanted him as much as he had wanted her, he knew that. It would have been all too easy to let her finish getting his pants off and then sink into her. He had already had her in place, in the right position. He could have all too easily pushed into her, not stopping until she screamed for him, but he had made the right choice. Lucien kept repeating that to himself over and over. It had been the right choice to stop it all, to let her go. When it did happen, he wanted Elain moaning his name all night and they just didn’t have the time or privacy here. She had said she loved him. His heart thundered at the memory. She had said she loved him, and he wanted the first time he was inside of her to be worthy of that. That couldn’t be here, or now, but it would be soon.

When he decided that he had cooled down enough to ensure he wouldn’t be wandering off to Elain’s room, Lucien ran his hand over his face, smoothing his wet hair back as he let out a sigh. Using the fire within him, he began to slowly heat the water. There was no point going to bed cold. As the water grew more comfortable, Lucien relaxed, sinking back into the tub and closing his eyes. Idly, he wondered why the bond had shown Elain what he had done with Ianthe in that cave during Calanmai. He hadn’t seen the point of that, other than to be torturous to him and expose something that he had been deeply ashamed about. But then, Lucien realised that he felt lighter than he had before. He no longer had to try and keep that secret from her, he no longer had to worry about her finding out and what she might think of him. He no longer had to hide the shame. Elain knew what had happened, she had seen it, and she hadn’t turned away from him, she hadn’t been afraid. She loved him, not because she didn’t know what he had done, but despite that knowledge. Perhaps the bond knew what it was doing after all.

By the time Lucien had climbed out of the bath and wrapped his towel around his waist, he was yawning and ready for bed. The heat of the water, once he had gotten it to a good temperature, had drained the energy from him and he couldn’t wait to climb under the covers and sink into blissful sleep. He had just moved back into the bedroom, pulling the covers back when there was a small knock at the door and he turned to look at it. Wondering if Elain had come back, he checked that the towel was secure around his waist before he strode toward the door to open it.

He did not expect to see Vassa standing in the hallway and he just blinked in shock. “Lucien.” She smiled, pushing past him as she strode inside and he turned to watch her, not knowing what to say. “Close the door.” She said, and Lucien shook his head. 

“No…”

Vassa grunted and moved closer, pushing the door closed before turning her bright blue eyes on him. Lucien just stood watching her warily. “What do you want, Vassa?” he asked. 

“Always so blunt.” She smiled, laughing a little. “Weren’t you raised in a court?”

“I’m not playing court games with you.” He said. 

Vassa pouted a little, her eyes moving over him and Lucien was reminded that he was only wearing a towel around his waist. “But they’re so fun.” She said, “Especially when the other players are as clever as you are…”

“I rarely find that’s the case.”

She laughed again, looking up at him and Lucien took a step away from her when she took one toward him. She took another step and he hit the door, trying to move back. “Vassa…”

“I do like this wet look…”she said, lifting a hand to his damp hair, “Somehow you’re even more handsome…” He flinched when she moved her fingers through his hair. 

“Don’t…” he shifted sideways, away from her but she followed him. 

“I don’t understand.” She said, blue eyes coming back to his face, “Didn’t we always get on so well…”

“Yes.” He replied, “You were my friend.”

Her eyes were wide as she met his, another pout on her lips. “I want to be more than your friend.”

Shaking his head, Lucien continued to edge away from her. “I have a mate.” He said firmly.

“Oh,” Vassa waved a hand, “That shy little thing.” She laughed, stepping closer again, “There’s obviously some mistake. She nothing like you, but you and I are the same… We would be wonderful.” When Vassa’s fingers brushed the edge of his towel, Lucien froze. “Imagine it.” She purred, her chest just about pressed to his as she gazed up at him, “You and I would be like fire.”

“No.” he murmured, pushing her hands away from his towel and slipping out from between her and the wall. Ianthe had done this to him once before, and he wouldn’t allow it to happen again. 

“Come on,” Vassa’s hand caught Lucien’s wrist, “Don’t worry about that silly Mate business. Why waste your time chasing a frigid little mouse like her, when you could have fire?” 

“Her name is Elain.” Lucien said, steel in his voice now as he pulled his wrist from her grip. “I love her.” Vassa just looked at him and he could see disappointment in her eyes. “You should leave.” He told her. “Now.”

“You think so?”

“I do.”

Vassa took a step away from him, and he could easily read the bitterness and anger in her face. Shaking her head, she turned toward the door and yanked it open before stalking out into the hallway. Lucien just watched silently and then closed the door with a heavy sigh. This time he made sure the door was locked before he went back to the bed. 

Exhaustion returned as he untucked his towel and threw it over a nearby chair before slipping between the sheets of his bed. As he tucked the covers around himself, closing his eyes, the urge to get up and go to find Elain returned. He shouldn’t have let her leave. Even if all they had done was lay curled around one another as they slept, that would have been preferable to this. He wanted her with him and he didn’t know how he was going to get any rest without her.


	54. Chapter Fifty-Four

**Chapter 54**

By the time they had returned to the Night Court, Elain was more than ready to get away from Vassa and her mansion. She had found herself missing Prythian and everything about it. She missed the colours, the scents, and even the food. So, their first morning back at Rhysand’s Town House had put her in an extraordinarily good mood. Unable to help her smile, Elain just watched the others around her. They had returned after the usual lunch time, but hadn’t had anything to eat and so they were all gathered around the couches in the sitting room having an informal feast and it pleased Elain to no end. She watched Cassian continually trying to gain Nesta’s attention with twice his usual determination, obviously having felt deprived of her for the past few days they had been gone. Nesta was clearly trying her hardest to ignore his efforts as she spoke quietly with Mor, but Elain noticed her sisters blue-grey eyes flicking toward the Illyrian on several occasions. 

Nibbling on a sandwich, Elain watched the others happily, enjoying the easy way they all were with one another and the way they all interacted. Then, glancing toward the door, she wondered where Lucien was. He had taken off into Velaris as soon as they had gotten back and was yet to return. After the third time she had craned her neck to try and see out into the hallway in about as many minutes, Feyre nudged her with her knee. 

“Where’d he go?” her sister asked and Elain shook her head. 

“I don’t know.” Unable to help herself, Elain glanced at the door again, “He didn’t say…”

“I’m sure he’ll be back soon enough.” Feyre said and Elain turned her eyes on her sister. “Can’t you tell where he is?”

“If I try to.” Elain said softly, “Mostly I try not to track him… That seems… invasive.”

“Can’t hurt to check if you’re worried.”

“I don’t think curious and worried are the same thing.”

“Just check,” Feyre told her, “That way we will know if we have to go and find him…”

Elain let out a soft sigh and listened for Lucien’s heartbeat. “Closer than the city… he must be on his way back.”

“There we go, then.”

Elain nodded, settling back in her chair as Azriel passed her a plate of chocolate biscuits. She took one with a smile and passed the plate on to Mor who took three. Trying to resist a smile, Elain watched as those three biscuits disappeared within minutes and the blonde’s dark eyes followed the plate around the room, widening in dismay when it reached Cassian and the remaining biscuits were promptly devoured. 

“That was a completely unnecessary display.” Nesta told him and he just shrugged looking back at her.

“Got to keep my strength up.” He said.

“For what?” she asked drily and then looked away when he raised an eyebrow at her. 

Elain grinned and then looked around when Lucien walked into the room, stopping when he saw that all of them were present and now looking at him. “Did I miss lunch?” he asked.

“There’s plenty left.” Rhys said, indicating the low table by the wall, still laden with plates of sandwiches and snacks. Lucien set the box under his arm down on the ground next to the chair by Elain and headed over to the table. Elain watched him until he returned, sinking down beside her with a grin.

Lucien’s smile widened when he took a bite of one of his sandwiches and Elain watched his eyes flicker closed for a moment. “Did you miss food with actual flavour too?” she asked and he just nodded, taking another bite. Elain smiled, watching him. “I was thinking…” she murmured, low enough that only he could hear her. “… what if… what if… we didn’t sleep in different rooms…”

Lucien’s eyes flicked directly to Elain and he raised an eyebrow at her. Heat flooded her face and she bit her lip, wanting to look away, but forcing herself to meet his eyes. “You mean…”

“I mean for sleeping.” She said, “Just regular sleeping… what if… we stayed together.”

“What made you think of this?” he asked mildly and Elain gave a light shrug. 

“I just…” she made a face, “It was hard to sleep last night because all I could think about was how I wanted to go back to you.”

“I had the same thought.” He replied and Elain smiled in relief when he took one of her hands, holding it gently. “It took me forever to fall asleep because I wished you had stayed.”

“Perfect.” Elain smiled more widely at him, wondering if she would prefer if he came to sleep in her room or if she would go to his.

“All of a sudden I find myself wishing it were bedtime.” Lucien told her, and she couldn’t hold back a soft laugh. “I have something for you.” He added, releasing her hand and turning to bend and lift the box he had set by his chair. 

“What is it?” She asked, and Lucien raised an eyebrow at her.

“Why don’t you open it and find out?” he replied, setting the box gently in her lap. 

“… is this what you went into the city for?”

“Yes.”

Elain glanced at him as she tried to open the box before looking back to what she was doing and managing to get the lid open. “Oh, is this…?” her fingers traced the heavy periwinkle blue material for a moment before lifting it from the box. It was long enough that Elain had to get to her feet as she shook it out. “Oh…” her eyes moved over the gorgeous fur-lined cloak she held before flicking again to Lucien. “Are we… going to the Winter Court?” she asked, excitement building within her.

“Rhys told me this morning.” He said, lips quirking in a smile, “I thought you might need it for when you’re ferreting around looking for frostflowers.” 

“I wouldn’t say I _ferret_.” She retorted and Lucien smiled more widely at her, getting to his own feet.

“Of course not.” He said, helping her to lift the cloak to settle around her shoulders, “Let’s see if it’s the correct length.” She just watched his face as his eyes moved over her, eying the cloak critically before he smiled. “Perfect.”

Elain swished the cloak a little, watching Lucien as he smiled at her again. “This was the first thing you thought to do, knowing that we were going to the Winter Court?” she asked and he nodded.

“I’ve been there.” He replied, “It’s cold.”

“He’s not wrong.” Mor’s voice said softly as the blonde’s hands stroked the edge of the cloak Elain was still wearing. It was then that Elain realised everyone in the room had been watching them the whole time and she looked back to Lucien with wide eyes. He just smiled at her, evidently having read her expression and realised what she had been thinking. Reaching forward, he lifted the hood to settle over her, his grin widening and Elain forgot all about the others as she watched Lucien’s eyes move over her again. 

“Thank you.” She said softly, reaching her own hand out to him, her fingers skimming up his arm. “Do you need anything?” she asked, “I should get you something in return…”

“Are you asking what I require in payment?” he asked and Elain heard the edge of mischief in his voice. She nodded, eyes narrowed at him. “How about,” he suggested, “a kiss?”

“A kiss?” Elain pushed the hood back, looking up at him. “That is a rather steep price…” she looked down at herself for a moment, “but it is a very nice cloak…” Lucien raised an eyebrow at her, a smirk forming on his lips again before Elain nodded as if coming to her decision. “Very well.” She stepped toward him, going up on her toes as she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down so that she could kiss him. Almost instantly, Lucien’s arms snaked around her and he lifted her from the ground as he straightened, holding her to himself as he returned her kiss with enthusiasm. 

When he had set her back on her feet, Elain realised that they were still being watched and she slowly turned to look at the others. Nesta was staring at them with wide eyes, while Cassian appeared to have frozen in open mouthed incredulity. Rhys picked up a sandwich, pretending that he hadn’t even been watching while Amren drained her glass, smacking Cassian in the arm as she did so, causing him to shake himself and close his mouth. 

“I just noticed,” Feyre said, breaking the silence, her eyes on Lucien, “Every time you get your hands on Elain, you pick her up.”

Elain stared at her sister. 

“I… hadn’t realised.” Lucien said, and Elain could hear the awkwardness in his voice. She glanced at him to see him lift a hand to the back of his neck, his own eyes shifting her way. 

“I…” Elain began, “I should put this away…” she took a step toward the door, grabbing Lucien’s hand on her way past him, “Help me.” 

Without waiting for further comment from anyone else, she pulled him out into the hallway and upstairs away from further prying eyes.


	55. Chapter Fifty-Five

**Chapter 55**

When Lucien bent to press a kiss to Elain’s cheek, she smiled at him in her vanity mirror, setting her hairbrush down in her lap. “Will you be back after dinner?” she asked, and he slid his arm across her until he could rest her throat in the crook of his elbow. He kissed her again, this time pressing his lips to the top of her head.

“I should be.”

“Okay.” Elain smiled, leaning back against him as she held his gaze in the mirror.

Lucien smiled back at her, stranding straighter until it was his hands loosely around her throat, caressing her. “Have fun with your sisters.” He said, and Elain could see the mischief in his eyes, hear the teasing note in his voice, and she knew that he was all too happy about not having to be around for when Feyre and Nesta wanted to talk about what they had seen earlier.

“You think you’re getting the better deal here?” she asked and he grinned in response. “I hope you have a good time with Cassian.” She continued, honey in her voice, and watched as his grin faded. “Yeah, that’s right.”

“Uh…” Lucien opened his mouth as if to say something, his eyes wide as he blinked. Elain just laughed. 

“Oh, you’ll be fine.” She told him, smiling widely. “We’ll both do what we must.” One of his hands moved up her throat to her jaw, tilting her face up, as he bent over her to press a kiss to her lips.

“Yes.” He murmured, “And then, I’m really looking forward to bedtime.”

Smiling up at him, Elain nodded as he kissed her again. She was very much looking forward to it as well, but they had a whole evening to get through before they would be able to go to bed. When Lucien released her, Elain picked up her hairbrush again as he straightened and stepped back from her. “I’ll see you later.” She told him and he gave her a wink before he headed for the door. 

Looking back to the mirror, Elain began to brush out her hair before bringing it, piece by piece, up onto her head where she set about securing it with pins. When she was satisfied, she headed downstairs to find Feyre and Nesta. “Where are Mor and Amren?” Elain asked, sinking down onto the couch beside Nesta. She had assumed that since Lucien had gone into Velaris with Rhys, Azriel and Cassian, that Mor and Amren would be joining her and her sisters.

“They decided that we needed a little privacy.” Feyre grinned and Elain bit back a groan.

“Why?” she huffed.

“Sisterly talk.” Feyre replied, grinning more widely. 

“You mean you’re going to torture me for information.”

“Only if you don’t willingly talk.”

Elain looked to Nesta for help, but Nesta just shook her head. “Things are obviously changing.” Her older sister said, “And I want to know too…”

“Yeah, I’m not doing this without wine.” Elain said and Feyre chuckled, getting to her feet and walking from the room. 

While her younger sister was gone, Elain tried to work out what her sisters already knew and what they would probably be asking her about. She bit her lip at the memory of Feyre settling an air shield around her bedroom so that the rest of the house wouldn’t hear her the night Lucien had come to her before he had left to give her space to decide what she wanted. Yeah, she was definitely going to need wine. 

“Alright…” Feyre strode back into the room with a bottle of wine and three glasses, and Elain watched as wine filled the glasses before one was passed her way. Lifting the glass, she took a long sip and eyed her sisters again. “Talk.” Feyre said, settling back in her own armchair, legs slung over the side. 

“Talk?” Elain asked, “That’s vague…”

“Lucien Vanserra…” Feyre waved a hand, “Come on…”

Elain said nothing, just looked between Feyre and Nesta as she tried to work out what to tell them.

“…You love him.” Nesta prompted, and Elain’s eyes flicked to meet her sister’s. Nesta just looked calmly back at her and, after a moment, Elain nodded.

“Yes.”

“Hm.” Nesta drained half the wine from her glass, her eyes still on Elain. “How do you know?”

“I wasn’t sure I did know…” Elain murmured, “So, I asked Mor.”

Feyre laughed and Elain glanced her way. “You asked Mor? So she could tell you the truth?”

“Yes.” Elain looked back to Nesta, “But I didn’t need to…I already knew it.”

“Are you going to accept the bond?” Feyre asked and Elain bit her lip. She began tracing her finger around the top of her wineglass, listening to it sing as she did so. 

“I… I haven’t thought that far ahead…”

“Don’t push her.” Nesta turned toward Feyre.

“I’m not.” Feyre said, lifting a hand in defence. “I just want to know… if I’ll have to create any more sound shields…”

“First of all,” Elain jumped in before Feyre could say anything else about that, “There’s no way I’ll be accepting it anywhere near this place.” She pointed out the door toward the stairs, “And, second… I wouldn’t be taking him upstairs so that the whole house could listen to whatever mating frenzy we would end up in…”

“Where would you go?” Feyre asked and Elain shook her head.

“I… don’t know.” She made a face, “I haven’t thought about it… I said that…”

“If you love him…”

“I do.” Elain said, “There’s no ‘if’ about it.”

Feyre looked at her, swirling her wine around her glass, “Then accepting the bond-”

“Feyre!” Nesta said sharply, “There’s no rush. Let her just have this as it is for a while…”

“Okay…” Feyre said, her eyes moving from Elain to Nesta and then back again, “… and how is it?”

Elain blinked at her. “What do you mean?”

“We’ve all seen how handsy you are with one another…” Feyre said, “And I know what I’ve seen…” Elain blushed at the memory of her sister’s mind brushing hers as Lucien had licked steadily between her thighs. Nesta was looking between them with an odd expression on her face and Elain took another sip of her wine. “So,” Feyre continued, “Have you found out if he fucks like he’s got fire in his blood yet?”

Eyeing the bottle of wine sitting on the table, Elain tried to keep her face neutral. “No.” She murmured, “I have not.”

“…are you going to wait until you accept the bond?” Feyre asked, “… for the frenzy?” Elain looked at her sister then. Feyre’s eyes were a little wide and Elain shook her head, watching as her sister relaxed a little. 

“Maybe we should talk about Nesta and Cassian…” Elain murmured, reaching for anything that wasn’t centred around when she and Lucien were going to have sex. She didn’t have an answer to that question. She wanted him, and she knew that he wanted her. She hadn’t planned on waiting until she had formally accepted the bond purely because she did want him, she hadn’t even considered the issues that could arise if she was a virgin when the mating frenzy hit them.

“Nesta and Cassian…” Feyre echoed and Nesta whipped her head around to look at Elain. 

“Sorry…” Elain smiled, “But we’ve talked about me enough…”

“Because you have something to talk about.” Nesta replied, “I don’t…”

“Cassian would disagree.” Feyre put in. 

“Cassian can go jump in the Sidra.” Nesta snapped. Feyre smirked and reached for the wine bottle. “Are we going to actually have dinner, or are we just going to sit here and drink wine?”

“I’m sure we can do both.” Feyre replied, grinning at Nesta and Elain tried to hide a smile. This was far more entertaining when they were talking about somebody who wasn’t her.


	56. Chapter Fifty-Six

**Chapter 56**

Getting out of the bathtub, Elain dried off quickly before slipping her nightdress over her head and lacing up the front. Idly she strolled to her vanity and sank down as she began pulling the pins from her hair. After they had eaten, Nesta had been more than eager for them to retire to their rooms for the night, and Elain was sure this was to avoid further conversation about the status of her not-quite-relationship with Cassian. She couldn’t blame her elder sister; discussing such things was beyond difficult when you hadn’t sorted it out in your own head. Elain hoped that Nesta did sort it out, though. The way that Cassian looked at her sister had taken Elain by surprise the first time she had seen it. Surely Nesta had noticed it herself. Maybe that was why she was resisting it, Elain thought. Maybe it had frightened her.

Dragging her brush through her hair, Elain glanced at the door. She hadn’t heard the others return to the Town House, but she could hear Lucien’s heartbeat. He was in his room. They still hadn’t talked about where they would sleep, only that they would be together, so she didn’t know if he was expecting her to come to him, or if he was getting ready to come to her. It wasn’t really that late yet, so maybe he just wasn’t ready yet. Tossing her brush onto the vanity, Elain got to her feet. 

Running her hands over her face, she strode across the room and then back. Maybe she was meant to go to him. What if he was waiting for her? What if she got into bed and fell asleep waiting for him while he was waiting for her and then he thought that she had changed her mind? “Stop it.” Elain muttered to herself. “You’re being ridiculous.”

Glancing around the room, Elain spotted a pile of books on the nightstand and moved to pick up the one sitting on top. It belonged in Rhys’ library. Perhaps she should take it back instead of pacing back and forth while she waited for Lucien to appear or for herself to make the decision to go to him. 

Hurrying for her door, Elain carried the book down the dark stairs and up the hallway as she headed for the shelves to which the book belonged. Wishing that she had brought a light, or could create light the way that Lucien could, she was thankful to see that the faint embers in the fireplace were still glowing enough for her to see by as she skirted around a chair she almost certainly would have walked into in the dark. She was able to locate where the book belonged by running her hand along the book spines, and then she headed back for the door.

A flicker of shadows by one of the couches made Elain jump and she stifled a shriek by clamping a hand over her mouth. “Sorry…” Azriel’s quiet voice came out of the darkness and Elain relaxed. “I did not think you would see…”

“I nearly didn’t.” Elain replied, squinting at his shifting form in the darkness. Shadows seemed to solidify and another face peered at her from the black. Ceridwen. _Oh_. “I… I was just returning a book…” Elain turned back to the hallway. “Sorry… Goodnight…”

Silence followed Elain as she hurried back up the stairs and to her bedroom. Wondering if anybody else knew about that, she pushed her door closed and had just resumed pacing when a soft knock sounded. Walking quickly to open it, she had already begun her reassurances. “I won’t say anything, I promise-” the words stuck when she found herself looking up at Lucien. 

“About what?” he asked, grinning at her.

“Oh… don’t worry…” Elain stepped back to let him in and smiled when she saw the books tucked under his arm.

“Were you expecting someone else?” he asked as she closed the door. 

“No.” Elain said, “Although I was wondering if you were coming here or if I was meant to go to you.” She turned to follow him across the room. 

“I prefer this.” He said, “You’re in here… aspects of you… you live here…” he smiled as his eyes flickered around the room, “There’s nothing of mine in my room other than a few clothes and books…”

“You don’t live here.” She said and he nodded. 

“No.” he agreed, “So, this is better…”

“What did you bring?” she asked, gesturing at the books he was still holding.

Lucien’s smile brightened and he lifted them for her to see. “The one I told you about the other day…” he held it out for her, “And one that I’ve just begun. Can’t tell if it’s good yet or not.”

“Do you want to read in bed?” she asked, trying not to grin at him. She couldn’t help the blush she felt creep across her cheeks at the look he gave her in response.

“Unless you had something else in mind…”

“No…” Elain ran her fingers across the cover of the book he had given her before moving for the bed and pulling the sheets back. She didn’t understand why she was feeling nervous. Perhaps she was building this up in her mind more than she should be. It wasn’t as if they were about to have sex. They were just going to share a bed, which they had done before.   
But not like this. This was the first step in changing something about their relationship. This was about the future. Swallowing, Elain slipped beneath the covers, settling herself against her pillows as Lucien joined her. 

Elain watched him as he smoothed the covers down, placing his book on his lap. He must have sensed her eyes on him because his hands paused and then he turned his head toward her. “…If you’d prefer I go…”

“What? No.”

Lucien’s eyes narrowed as he looked at her face. “I can feel your unease.”

Elain reached over and took one of his hands, linking her fingers through his and resting them both together on the covers between them. “I want you here.” She said softly, “I don’t know why I feel nervous, but it’s not because I want you to leave. I’ve been looking forward to this all afternoon.”

“Me too.”

Elain squeezed his hand and gave him a small smile. “Do you want to read to me?” she asked and Lucien smiled widely back. 

“Absolutely.” He moved quickly, slipping his hand from hers and shifting closer to wrap his arm around her shoulders, allowing Elain to settle comfortably against him. “Here…” With his free hand he picked up the book he’d brought for her and flipped it open. “Don’t fall asleep now,” he murmured, and she could feel his breath against her hair, “I won’t know where you’re up to in the story…”

“I’ll try not to.” She replied, already feeling herself relax into his warmth. Adjusting the covers around them, Elain leaned her head back against Lucien’s shoulder. She no longer felt uneasy or nervous; this felt comfortable and relaxing. 

As Lucien began to read, Elain smiled gently. His voice was low and soft and steady and a peace settled over Elain that she usually only felt out in the garden. She hadn’t felt this at home and sure of herself and the way everything was since she had been living with her father and her sisters back home before any of this had happened. Lucien turned a page with one hand while his other slid along Elain’s wrist and contentedness slid down the bond to her from him as well. Turning her head slightly she looked up at him, her eyes moving across the lines of his face, watching as he continued to read softly to her, his own eyes moving across the pages of the book.

“Are you listening?” he asked, his lips stretching into a smile before his eyes flicked down to meet hers. 

“Yes.”

“Well, I hope so, because all this backstory is important for lat-” Elain stretched up and cut him off with a kiss. She felt Lucien’s surprise for only a moment before he smiled into the kiss and one his hands came lightly to her cheek. An instant later he lifted his head a little, “Are you trying to distract me?” he asked before pressing his lips lightly to hers again, “Because we’re only about five pages in…”

“I’m sure it’s very good…” Elain murmured.

“Mhmm.” Lucien nodded, kissing her again, “It is.”

Elain gave a happy sigh. “Okay.” She breathed, settling back down against him again. “Go on…”

Lucien pressed a kiss to Elain’s temple, his free arm tightening around her again. “As you wish.” He said softly, opening the book back up to where he had been. He continued to read, and Elain listened, comfortable and content as she trailed her fingers over the corded muscles of his forearm, and she decided that this should be how they finished every day from now on.


	57. Chapter Fifty-Seven

**Chapter 57**

Tucking Elain’s cloak more tightly around her, Lucien braced himself against the icy wind as they headed toward Kallias’ palace. Elain shuffled closer and he wrapped an arm around her, letting her huddle into him as they moved forward. “Weren’t they going to send someone to meet us?” she asked and Lucien nodded. 

“Yes.” He muttered, squinting into the wind. “They were…” He felt Elain shudder and pulled her closer.

“At least we get to see how beautiful it is…” Her teeth were chattering and Lucien pulled her to a stop. 

“Here…” He ghosted his hands over her shoulders and down the cloak, sending a small spark of his power into it to keep her warm.

“Oh, was that… a heating spell…?”

“Something like that.” He replied, slipping an arm around her again. “I’d try winnowing us closer, but we might miss them if they’re coming…”

“Do you think they are?”

Lucien caught sight of something moving through the snow. His metallic eye allowed him to focus better on it as it moved closer and he smiled as he pointed it out to Elain. “Yes…” he watched as it approached. “It’s one of Kallias’ sleighs.”

“Are those reindeer?”

“They are.”

Elain gave a little bounce and they just stood, waiting as the sleigh approached them. He watched as it came to a stop just ahead of them and he was surprised to see Kallias himself was driving it. Elain had darted forward before he could stop her as she hurried toward the reindeer, her hand out to meet the soft nose of the one leading the others.

“Sorry I am late.” Kallias said, and Lucien looked up to where he stood in the sleigh. The High Lord’s ice blue eyes flicked from Lucien toward Elain and then back again. “I lost track of time…” his eyes went back to Elain, watching her petting his reindeer. “I… take it you haven’t frozen just yet.”

“Not yet.” Lucien replied, watching Elain himself now. She was murmuring to the reindeer, smiling widely and he called to her as he approached the sleigh, climbing up easily into it.

“Viviane spoils them with attention, too.” Kallias said as Elain approached the sleigh and passed her bag up to Lucien. He took it and set it aside before reaching down to Elain and taking her hand. Lifting her easily up to join him, Lucien turned his eyes back on Kallias as the High Lord continued. “They follow her everywhere.”

“They’re very cute.” Elain said, and Kallias inclined his head while he waited for them to be seated. 

Lucien sat back against the seat, smiling at Elain as she settled against him. She met his smile with her own for a moment and then turned her attention to what was around them as Kallias got them moving. As the snow flurried around them, Elain’s dark eyes continued to move as they approached the palace. Lucien knew that the Winter Court was beautiful, he had always enjoyed coming to visit this place, but he found himself unable to look away from his mate’s face. She looked utterly enchanted, her eyes wide as if seemingly trying to absorb every detail she saw. Elain’s smile widened as they passed a white bear and she sat straighter to watch it for as long as she could.

“This place…” she said, turning to meet Lucien’s eyes, “is unlike anything I have ever seen…”

“It is beautiful.” He said, his hand closing around a handful of her cloak as she leaned forward suddenly, trying to get a better look at a flowering tree as they passed. “Careful…”

“The flowers!” she glanced back at him before looking quickly around again, “How am I going to be able to choose only a handful?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien smiled, still not releasing her cloak. He watched her in her excitement until Kallias pulled the reindeer drawing their sleigh to a stop and jumped down. 

“Here we are,” the High Lord said, “Welcome to the Winter Court.” Lucien watched Elain as she turned toward the palace, her dark eyes lifting to take it all in and he took her hand carefully to help her out of the sleigh as she gaped. Kallias gave a low laugh before speaking again. “You will, of course, be given the chance to wander the grounds wherever you like. There are gardens surrounding the palace, and more beyond the immediate grounds.”

“Thank you.” Elain’s excitement was evident in her voice and Lucien slung his pack over his shoulder, before picking up her bag and doing the same. Taking her hand, he gave her a smile as they followed Kallias inside. 

“There are reindeer calves I’m sure Viv will show you.” The words were said casually over Kallias’ shoulder, but Elain’s step faltered and Lucien had to tighten his hold on her hand to keep her moving. 

“Baby reindeer?” she asked, just about bouncing along. 

“Indeed.” Kallias confirmed, pushing open large double doors.

Lucien scanned the large hall. It was just as he remembered it. Huge blazing fireplaces lined the walls and there were faeries gathered in groups throughout. Huge windows allowed much natural light into the hall and extended up to the ceiling to enable those inside to see the snow still falling steadily. Nothing here was bulky or anything less than elegant. 

“Oh, Kal found you!” Viviane, the Lady of the Winter Court, hurried toward them, her white-blonde hair loose around her face. 

“Yes, Lady.” Lucien replied, straightening himself and feeling Elain move closer. 

“Are you well?” Viviane asked them, her blue eyes moving across Lucien and then Elain, “Are you warm?” she gestured to a nearby fireplace, “Please…”

As Lucien and Elain followed Viviane toward the fireplace Kallias approached. “Are you acting as if I don’t take care of my own guests?” he asked his wife, wrapping an arm around her and pressing a kiss to her hair.

“Look at them. They’re half frozen.” Viviane replied, smiling brightly as she leaned into Kallias’ shoulder. 

As Elain shuffled closer to the fireplace, Lucien watched the High Lord and his Lady. He had never seen Kallias like this before, had never seen him so open and relaxed. The High Lord of Winter had always seemed cold and detached, and more than a little aloof. Perhaps the mating bond had changed him. Perhaps being with Viviane had. Perhaps, Lucien thought, he had been another who had been play acting in order to protect his court and those he cared about.

Allowing his gaze to move around the rest of the hall, Lucien scanned the other faeries present, looking for anyone else he recognised. There were a few faces familiar from over the years, but nobody that he knew particularly well. 

“Have you anything to eat since breakfast?” Viviane asked, and Lucien nodded, looking at her again.

“Yes, we had lunch before we left.” He smiled when Elain took his hand gently. 

“If you would like to be shown to the room we’ve prepared for you.” Kallias began, “You can get settled and changed and make yourselves comfortable. Then, Lucien, you and I might discuss the reason for your visit… and Viv can show Elain the reindeer calves.”

Lucien felt Elain’s excitement reignite as she squeezed his hand. “Yes, thank you.” He replied, “That would be perfect.”

Kallias indicated to somebody nearby and a short faerie with translucent wings approached. Lucien adjusted his hold on the bags he carried before he and Elain turned to follow the faerie to their room. 

Once they had been shown the door to their room and headed inside, Elain turned to Lucien with disbelief on her face. “I had thought places like this only existed in stories…”

“What do you think the stories were based on?” he replied, flicking a grin her way. 

“None of the others have been this… grand…” she breathed, “Are the courts we haven’t visited yet like this?”

Lucien paused for a moment, thinking. “Well, none of them are alike… but… I suppose there is something grand in each of them…”

“They’re nice, aren’t they?” Elain sat on the pale bedspread that was draped across the enormous bed, “Kallias and Viviane…?”

Nodding, Lucien set their bags on a table by the wall. “Yes. They seem quite content with each other…”

“They’re mates. Feyre told me.”

“They are. Recently, too.”

Elain smoothed her hands across the bedspread as she looked at him. “Feyre said it happened after Amarantha… That Kallias went straight to Viviane…”

“That doesn’t surprise me.” Lucien replied, “They have always been close friends… if they loved one another while Amarantha kept them apart…”

“That would have been awful.”

“Yes.”

Elain stood up and moved toward him, and Lucien reached a hand out to her as she approached, smiling when she took it in one of her own. “I love you.” She murmured, and he felt her slide her other hand around to his back as she looked up at him. “I’m never going to let anyone do that to us…”

Lucien’s heartbeat just about tripled in pace at those words and he pressed a kiss to Elain’s forehead. “They won’t.”

“Okay.” Her voice was soft as she leaned into him for a moment before stepping back again. “Okay, now you have to go do Emissary things so I can go and see the baby reindeer…” 

“Ah.” He murmured, watching her smile brightly at him, “Well, what makes you think I don’t want to see them too?”

“Once I know where they are, I’ll be able to show you later.” She smiled more brightly at him and Lucien nodded, tucking a loose lock of her hair back into her braid.

“I’d like that.” He unfastened his cloak, having no need for it while they were indoors, and moved to hang it over the back of a chair. “I’ll find you after Kallias and I are finished.”

Elain nodded when he looked back around at her. “Okay, bye.” She smiled widely at him before hurrying for the door and disappearing back out into the hallway. Lucien watched the closed door for another moment before he moved to collect what he would need for his discussions with Kallias from his bag.


	58. Chapter Fifty-Eight

**Chapter 58**

He had definitely never seen Kallias like this, Lucien decided as they exited the brightly lit room with the large circular table in the centre. The High Lord had been open about what he had been trying to achieve within his court lately, and his plans for the future. There had been no evident evasion of questioning or attempts to talk Lucien into believing something that was inaccurate. Kallias had been straightforward and even friendly, and Lucien could not help looking at the other male out of the corner of his eye as they strode up the corridor. 

“So, Elain is your mate…”

Blinking, Lucien nodded. “Yes.” He replied, surprised by the question. 

“And you didn’t know her before?”

“No.”

“That must have been interesting.”

“That’s one word for it.” Lucien murmured. Kallias turned his pale eyes Lucien’s way and the High Lord gave a smile. 

“You seem alright with one another…”

“Yes.” Lucien replied, “We’re getting there.”

“She hasn’t accepted it?”

“Not formally.”

“I’m sorry.” Kallias said, and Lucien looked at him hearing the sincerity in his voice. “I can’t imagine how that must feel…”

Tilting his head, Lucien let out a soft sigh. “She loves me.” He told the other male, unable to help a smile at the words, “That’s enough for now.” 

“But you’ve…”

“No.”

“ _That_ ,” Kallias breathed, giving a soft laugh, “is an impressive amount of self-control.”

“Ah, I’m no stranger to that.” Lucien answered as the High Lord clapped him on the shoulder.

“I can’t tell you how thankful I am that the bond snapped into place for Viv and I when it did.” Kallias said conversationally, and Lucien listened. He was still surprised that the other male was speaking with him so freely. “We had only said our vows hours earlier and were… celebrating our reunion…” Lucien was pretty sure he knew exactly what they had been doing. Kallias gave him a smirk. “Everything has just been so much more… in focus…” he went on, “Under the mountain with Amarantha everything seemed to blur and became one long nightmare, but with Viviane, knowing that she is mine, everything is clear and has a purpose…”

Lucien’s heart ached. “That sounds wonderful.” He said softly. 

“You’ll see.” Kallias said, “You said she loves you, even before having accepted the bond. There must be real reasons, then. As long as there is love, I’m sure you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about.”

Lucien wondered what those reasons were. Elain had told him that she loved him after they had been apart for a few days, but he didn’t know why she did. She had missed him, she had told him that, but missing someone and loving them were completely different. “I hope so…”

They rounded a corner into a wider hallway and Kallias gestured toward the windows. “Viv would have taken her out that way to see the reindeer. They’re likely out in the gardens now…”

“Thank you.” Lucien needed to go and fetch his cloak if he was to head outside again.

“If you see my Lady, would you tell her I’ll be looking for her in our bedchamber…”

Lucien choked and tried to mask it with a polite cough. “Of course.”

*

Elain had never seen anything quite as cute as the tiny white reindeer calves. She and Viviane had sat and played with them for quite a time until it was clear that the little things had needed a rest, and they had decided to take a walk through the gardens instead. 

“I quite like the Dawn Court.” Viviane was telling Elain as they strolled through snowy pathways. “And Thesan is lovely.”

“Yes… I remember him…” Elain tried not to think of their camp during the war as much as possible, but Thesan was one of the nicer memories she had. 

“Everything in the Dawn Court is … gentle.” Vivian said, “I think you will like it.”

Elain smiled. “I like all of this…” She waved a hand around them. “Everything here is beyond what I could have imagined.”

Viviane gave a light laugh and nodded. “I grew up here, but I do understand you.” Elain felt the blonde’s hand on her arm for a moment, “I’ve seen all the courts, and each has its own magic, but…” Her pale eyes moves around the gardens and then up over the palace, “Nothing comes close to Winter.” A bright smile came Elain’s way, “It makes my heart sing.”

“This is where you belong…”

“Oh, yes.” Viviane smiled again, “I do belong here. With Kal.”

“Did you always love him?” Elain was surprised at her own boldness in asking the question, but Vivian looked thoughtful. 

“In a way.” She replied, “But I didn’t truly realise the extent of it until he was trapped Under the Mountain…”

“Before the bond?” Elain asked, curious. “You knew it before the bond?”

“Yes.” Viviane smiled at her, before understanding flashed through her pretty face. “You didn’t have that chance?”

“The bond hit us the moment I first looked Lucien in the eyes.” Elain said softly. Viviane stopped walking and turned to look at Elain. 

“That must have been hard.”

“It was.” Elain replied, “Frightening, too…”

“I can imagine that would be so, adjusting to new life as Fae as well…”

“Yes…”

“And how do you feel about it now?” Viviane asked.

“The bond?”

Viviane nodded, “You look comfortable with one another, yet I know you’ve not accepted it completely.” Blue eyes looked Elain over, “You’re travelling the courts together…”

“I love Lucien.” Elain told her gently, “It has taken time… but… I have come to realise that.”

“Bond or not, realising you love someone can take time.” Vivian touched her arm again, “It took me most of my life. Kal and I grew up together, and though he did what he could to protect me, sending me off to border duty to keep me away from danger, and everything else… I did not realise that I loved him until he was taken away from me.”

Elain nodded. “It took Lucien being away from me to truly begin to consider how I felt…” She let out a small breath, watching the steam puff out in front of her. “I did not enjoy the distance at all.”

“It does hurt.” Viviane gave her a knowing look. “I am glad that I already loved Kal when the bond snapped into place for us.” The Lady of the Winter Court gave Elain a small smile then, “It happened when we were… intimate…” 

Elain felt herself blush and she glanced around them. “That… sounds very intense.”

Viviane laughed again, “It was.” She met Elain’s gaze, “I don’t envy it happening to you when you were strangers, but I am glad for you that you have come to love him before you accept the bond. That will make it all the more special when you do so.”

“You think that I will?”

Viviane tilted her head. “Lucien Vanserra is a good male.” She said, brushing snowflakes from Elain’s shoulder, “I’m not surprised that you’ve come to love him, not having even accepted the bond. He’s loyal and kind and clever… And, loving him, I do think that you will want that bond…”

“Oh…” Elain blinked when Viviane linked their arms together, walking them toward the palace.

“If you want to know anything about what it’s like to be mated, and you don’t want to ask your sister, you can ask me.”

“…Thank you.” Elain was surprised that Viviane would talk to her as if they were old friends, and be so open about something so personal, but she couldn’t deny that she appreciated that honesty. “…what…” she began, nervous, “What is your favourite thing about being Kallias’ mate?”

“Oh…” Viviane walked in silence, still holding Elain’s arm in hers, “I love everything about it, so to choose one thing is difficult…” She was quiet for a few more moments and Elain just looked at the gardens around them while Viviane thought, “I… would probably have to say that I love the certainty.”

“The certainty?”

“Yes. I love the certainty of knowing that we have one another. I can feel that he loves me just as much as I love him and there’s no question about it. I always have someone who is… mine.” Viviane smiled and Elain could see the glow of happiness within her, “I am his and he is mine and nobody will ever be able to break that. It is certain.”

“You will always be his first priority…”

“Yes.”

Elain smiled. “That does sound wonderful.”

“It is.” Viviane squeezed Elain’s arm, “Can you imagine that with Lucien?”

“Yes…” Elain’s voice was barely a whisper in the frosty air. She hadn’t even needed to think about it. She could see that all too easily, picture exactly that kind of dedication and, to some degree, felt like she already had it. Lucien was already there, though. She knew that he’d felt the bond more strongly than she had right from the start, and she wondered what it must feel like to feel that certainty within yourself, but not have it returned. “Did it change how you saw yourself?” She asked, glancing at the blonde beside her. “Suddenly belonging to someone else?”

“No.” Viviane replied firmly, “Kal is part of me. I felt more like myself, like who I was meant to be.” Elain just nodded, thinking. She wanted to find Lucien, wanted to hug him and tell him that she was sorry for any hurt she had caused. “Was that helpful?”

“Yes…” Elain replied, “Thank you…”

“You’re close, aren’t you?” Viviane grinned at her, “You’re close to accepting it. I can tell.”

“I…”

“You just need a little Winter Court romance… And this place is very romantic.”

“Oh…” Elain didn’t know how to reply to that. 

“Kal and I will take care of it. Don’t worry.”

Elain felt relief flow through her when she saw red hair flash as Lucien strode toward them through the snow. Viviane released Elain’s arm and stood looking at the both of them with a pleased smile on her face. “Kallias asked me to let you know he… will be in your bedchamber…” Lucien was evidently trying to keep his face neutral and Elain turned her gaze on Viviane who only smiled more widely. 

“We will see both of you for dinner.” The blonde said before striding away and leaving them in the garden.


	59. Chapter Fifty-Nine

**Chapter 59**

“How were the reindeer?” Lucien asked her and Elain smiled, taking his hand in hers.

“They were adorable.” She told him and he squeezed her hand lightly as they began to walk slowly through the garden together, watching as the snow fluttered down around them lightly and elegantly. “Was your meeting with Kallias pleasant?”

“It was.” He told her, “He is keen to re-establish trade routes that were shut down by Amarantha between some of the courts.”

“Why did she do that?”

“Just another way of isolating us.” Lucien murmured, and Elain nodded as she let her gaze wander over some of the nearby bushes, her eyes flicking quickly between the surprising array of colours. “Have you seen much of the gardens?” his tone was light and conversational and Elain shook her head.

“Just a little.” She replied, “I always thought that Winter had a beauty of its own, but I never really knew that so many exquisite flowers would thrive in such cold…” She paused to look at a large Camellia flower of palest pink. “It’s wonderous how something so delicate and beautiful can come out of something so harsh…” She turned her head to look up at Lucien, thinking about the Autumn Court and what he had gone through there. “But maybe I should have known that.”

Lucien lifted her hand to his lips, his gold and russet eyes moving back and forth across her face. “Yes, Petal.” He said softly as she turned to face him better, “Think of that tiny little house Tamlin found you living in, starving and relying on Feyre to hunt to feed you…” Elain blinked and his other hand came up to her cheek, “And look at you now. All three of you…” Elain couldn’t look away from him, her eyes locked on his gaze as his fingers stroked her cheek.

“I haven’t done anything…” she murmured, and Lucien shook his head.

“You survived.” He replied, both russet and golden eyes focused intently upon hers, “You survived and remained good and gentle and you care about others.”

“Just like you.”

Lucien smiled, and Elain moved closer, going up on her toes to wrap her arms around his neck. She felt his arms wrap around her waist and she pressed a soft kiss to the side of his throat. Lucien’s hold on her tightened, as she felt him shudder, and Elain smiled. It seemed almost impossible that someone like him, so worldly and clever, would think that she was in any way impressive. “Have you seen the Winter Court’s famed Eisblume plants?” he asked, and Elain shook her head, stepping back when he released her. “Come on…” he took her hand again and Elain let him lead her through the gardens. 

Smiling as they passed several garden beds overflowing with pale violet crocus flowers, snowdrops as white as the snow they were name after, and larger hellebore plants of ivory, blush, and green, Elain continued to allow her eyes to wander. She hadn’t imagined such colours in a winter garden, and knew that she would have a hard time choosing which to include in her book. “So…” she murmured, her hand tightening on Lucien’s to get his attention, “Did Kallias use you to send Viviane up to their bedroom so they could…?”

“Yep.”

“I…” she stifled a laugh, “She couldn’t stop talking about him…”

“He was the same.”

“They’re very in love.”

“They’re newly mated and very happy, and they want everyone else to be just as happy as they are.” Lucien smiled at her and Elain nodded her head in agreement. “I believe the Eisblume grows around here…” Elain held on to Lucien’s hand as he led her around a corner, close to the palace walls and into a sheltered area where the biting winter winds wouldn’t reach. 

“Oh…” Elain came to a stop, struck by the sight of dozens of beautiful flowers growing about knee height as the gentle winter sun reflected off of them. She glanced at Lucien and then back to the flowers, moving closer to get a better look. “Are they made of ice?” she asked, reaching out hesitantly to touch one. “Will it melt?”

“I don’t think so…” Lucien’s voice was soft, “I’ve seen them in vases inside on several occasions…They seem to do alright, even with all those fires.”

“They’re…” Elain traced a finger across the translucent petals of the closest flower. “They feel like ice…” she ran her finger down the stem, “They look like lilies made of ice…”

“Did you bring your book?”

“Yes…” Elain turned to face Lucien who was smiling at her. Everything around them was white and blue and so very pale, yet there he stood, so very red and vibrant, like a blazing fire in the middle of a snowstorm. “Oh, if I could draw you…”

“Me?” he asked, incredulity evident in his voice, “When you’re surrounded by so much beauty…” Elain moved toward him, her eyes trained on his face. 

“I know what I said.” She took his hands in hers. “You’re beautiful and I love you.”

“Because I’m beautiful?” he asked, a grin on his face. Elain shook her head. 

“Not because of that.”

Lucien’s grin slowly faded and he met her eyes. “Why, then?” he asked, his hands tightening on hers. 

“Why do I love you?”

“Yes. Despite knowing everything you know, all that … darkness… that the bond has shown you. It’s nothing but a sad story…”

“Have you forgotten what we talked about five minutes ago?” she asked, pulling one of her hands from his and lifting it to his chest to settle over his heart. She could feel his heartbeat beneath her hand, strong and powerful. “Your heart.” She murmured, “I have been able to hear it beating since I came out of that cauldron. It has been the one constant in my everchanging world. Strong. Powerful. A good heart.” Her eyes moved across his face, wanting to see him listening to her. “When you were gone I missed many things about you, realised that I had come to rely on having them in my life… Your voice, your kindness, your wit…” She lifted her other hand from his hand to his lips, “Your mouth…” she said, and he snickered. Elain lowered her hand back to his, linking their fingers together as she went on, “The fact that you will say what is on your mind, no matter who you are speaking to. You are genuine. You don’t pretend to be anything other than what you are. All of these things. More. But, mostly your heart. Hearing it has become part of my world. I trust it.” She smiled at him, “I trust you. I know that I could come to you with any problem, no matter how big or small, and you would do everything in your power to help me. I know that I will never be alone…” she rubbed her hand over his chest, and Lucien slid an arm around her waist, drawing her closer. 

“Of course I would do whatever I could to help you…” His lips pressed softly to Elain’s forehead and she leaned in to him. His arm tightened around her waist and Elain slid her own around him as she sank further into him, now resting her cheek against his chest.

“I love your good heart.” She breathed, listening as that heart began to beat more quickly. 

Both of Lucien’s hands came up to cup Elain’s jaw and he lifted her face to him so that he could kiss her. The moment she opened to him, responding to his kiss, his hands slid down to her waist and he lifted her to himself. Elain wrapped herself around him, unable to help a soft groan at his teasing licks, but then his tongue swept her mouth and Elain felt heat flood her. The same heat was radiating down the bond from Lucien and then he had put her back on her feet, his hands pulling her closer, sliding into her cloak and tugging at her.


	60. Chapter Sixty

**Chapter 60**

Lifting her head enough to look at Lucien, Elain could easily read the desire in his russet eye. Seeing how much he wanted her, she pressed her hands against his chest and pushed him backwards to the nearby outer wall of the palace. A wicked grin met her and Lucien raised an eyebrow. “What’re you doing, Petal?” he asked, his hands already moving over her again. Elain just smiled at him, her hands slipping inside his cloak as she began quickly untying the laces of his pants. Lucien’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. He didn’t move to stop her however, so Elain continued what she was doing, her eyes still on his face. 

“Is this okay?” she asked softly.

“Is what okay?” Lucien’s hands were still on her, and his voice was a low murmur. Elain slid her hand into his pants, watching his face carefully, trying to read his reactions. She didn’t know what was driving her, what was giving her the confidence to do this, but she did it all the same. Lucien’s eyes fluttered closed for a moment when she took hold of him, but then he had opened them again to meet her gaze. “…Yes…”

Pressing closer, Elain held Lucien’s eyes with her own. She had no idea what she was doing, only that she wanted to touch him. Biting her lip, Elain had been about to tell him that, when he’d moved to further undo his pants, shifting them out of her way so that she could have better access to him. A moment later she felt his hands over hers, guiding her to take a better hold of him, and then showing her how to move her hand over him. Elain heard a soft whimper slip out of Lucien as she continued to move her hand the way he had shown her, and then a shiver of excitement slid down the bond toward her. She couldn’t help glancing down at him when she felt him stiffen beneath her touch. “Look what you did…” he breathed, one of his hands coming up to her cheek once more. 

Elain looked, her own heartbeat thundering loudly in her ears. She continued to move her hand, watching as she did so and, when she heard Lucien’s breathing hitch, she looked back up to meet his eyes. “Was that right?” she asked, uncertainty flaring within her.

“Yes, Petal…” Lucien’s fingers moved across Elain’s cheek, “Perfect.”

Warmth spread through Elain at his words and a spark of confidence ignited. “Okay…” she murmured, meeting his eyes as he continued to caress her cheek, “Good…” Slowly, holding Lucien’s gaze, Elain went down on her knees in the snow before him.

She saw Lucien’s eyes widen and his hand froze on her cheek. “Elain…?” He bent as if to lift her back to her feet, but she stopped him. “You don’t have to do that…”

Elain smiled, her eyes moving over his surprised face. “I know.” She replied. 

She watched Lucien think, could practically see the progression of thoughts that flickered through his mind, before he nodded. “Alright…” His fingers stroked her cheek and Elain watched him as he looked up and around them before another shiver of excitement reached her down the bond and she knew that he liked this, liked the risk of them being seen. Elain doubted they would be. Who would be looking out into this little alcove hidden away as they were? 

“Lucien…” She looked up at him, a little unsure of how to proceed, and he nodded. 

“Here…” He leaned noticeably back against the wall, reaching out to her, and Elain shuffled forward in the snow. She could feel the cold soaking through her dress, but ignored it as she looked up at Lucien again, waiting for him to let her know what he wanted.

“I don’t know what to do.” Elain breathed. She had never done anything close to this before and, apart from that one time Graysen had tried to force her to do this for him, she had never been in a situation she had ever had to consider it.

“I know.” Lucien took hold of himself with one hand and, a moment later, his other came gently to Elain’s cheek. “I’ll help you…”

Elain sat a little higher on her knees, lifting one of her own hands to take hold of him, while her other rested against his thigh to help herself balance. Shyly, she licked carefully at him, surprised that he didn’t taste unpleasant, and listening as he gave a slight hiss followed by a low groan. Lucien’s gentle fingers brushed wayward strands of hair back from her face before he lifted her chin a little higher as she leaned toward him, licking her lips. Then, as Elain carefully took him into her mouth, she lifted her gaze to his face once more, pleased to see fire in that russet eye. As she watched, both of Lucien’s eyes closed and he leaned more heavily back against the wall. “Cauldron boil and fry me…” he groaned, and his hand slid from Elain’s cheek around to the back of her head, his fingers threading through her hair, and she knew that her braid would be destroyed.

Slowly, Elain tried to take as much of Lucien into her mouth as she could, pushing until just before she thought she might gag. “Easy…” he murmured, “Not too much…”

It wasn’t long before Lucien opened his eyes again, looking down at Elain, and she felt his hand tighten in her hair as he began to gently guide her movements on him. She did as he instructed, listening to the soft moans that fell from his lips here and there, each one giving her more and more confidence. Carefully she began to run her tongue along him as he continued to guide her and then she felt his other hand slide into her hair. “Oh, shit…” he groaned, and Elain listened to how quickly his heart was beating. She could feel him trying to be gentle, with his hands in her hair, as he continued to guide her movements, and she could feel his self-control in forcing himself to remain leaning back against that wall, allowing her control over the situation. Most of all she could feel his disbelieving happiness, his utter joy that she would want this, that she would want him. “Elain…”

Elain sat a little higher on her knees, humming in response to her name. Lucien’s hands tightened in her hair again as he moaned, and Elain kept her eyes on his face, pleasure flooding her at the realisation that she could do this to him. “Oh…” Lucien sounded like he was struggling to get the words out, “I… I…” his head tilted back against the wall as he looked to the sky, “I’m going to…”

His hands released her hair and Elain knew that she could pull away if she wanted to. He had given her that option, but Elain didn’t take it. She kept her movements even and rhythmic, just as she had been doing, using her tongue on him in the way she had worked out he liked. Lucien’s fingers went into her braid again when he gave a wordless cry and Elain swallowed everything he gave her, not stopping until he had sagged back against the wall. 

Sitting back on her heels, Elain just watched him as he slowly pulled himself back together again. Wiping her mouth and massaging at her jaw, she watched as he caught his breath and straightened a little, looking down at her with a smile. When he reached out to her, his fingers gently caressing her cheek, Elain smiled back. She allowed him to carefully pull her to her feet, brushing snow from her as he did so, and she realised that her dress was soaked and freezing from where she had been kneeling on it. She tried brushing further snow from it as Lucien tucked himself back into his pants, fastening the laces quickly, before flicking his cloak around himself. Her fingers pulled the tie from her hair and she quickly untangled her ruined braid, letting her hair fall loose and wavy around her.

Elain went to take a step back, but Lucien’s hands snaked out to grab her faster than she could follow and he’d pulled her to himself. Leaning into his warmth, she closed her eyes as he brought his lips to her ear. “Thank you.” He murmured, and she nodded, opening her eyes when she felt his fingers beneath her chin, lifting her face up to him. Lucien pressed a gentle kiss to the tip of her nose and then between her eyes and Elain smiled again. She watched his eyes, both russet and gold, move over her before his hands went to her shoulders and he turned her around. Elain was confused for a moment before she felt Lucien’s fingers move carefully through her hair as he gently pulled it back and she felt him begin to section it. Clever fingers moved quickly and a moment later he had taken her tie from her own hands, securing the braid he had just completed before turning her back around and smiling at her again. 

“Let’s get inside and out of the snow.” He said, “You’re going to want to get that wet dress off…” The grin he gave her then suggested that he rather liked that idea, too. 

“Yes,” Elain agreed, “I am wet…”

Lucien’s grin grew more wicked and she gave him a gentle shove as they began to head back around the palace toward the large doors that would take them inside.


	61. Chapter Sixty-One

**Chapter 61**

Dinner that evening was a lavish affair. Lucien surveyed the table with interest. He had always had pleasant experiences at the tables of the Winter Court over the years and he let his eyes scan the table before them as he looked for anything he might remember. There were all kinds of potato dishes, and some kind of pork flavoured with lingonberries. Several different kinds of soup sat nearby in deep ornate dishes, and Lucien was sure he could see a delicious pumpkin variety that he had fond memories of. He watched Elain dish a healthy amount of a thick stew onto her plate and then he smiled at the large vase of Eisblume sitting directly in front of her. He suspected that it was not by chance, and that Kallias or Viviane had made sure the flowers were right before her. 

Elain’s pretty dark eyes were focused firmly on the flowers as she ate silently, and he could see she was absolutely enchanted by them. He truly didn’t know if they were made of ice. He wouldn’t have thought so as they did grow… But, he supposed, it could have been some kind of magic he didn’t understand. He watched Elain’s eyes moving carefully over the ice blooms and knew that she was trying to take in every detail she could. Deciding that he would have to ask Kallias if they could have some of the flowers in their room, Lucien looked toward the High Lord. 

Kallias was watching Elain with his pale eyes, a smile on his face and Viviane, beside him, was doing the same. “How did you find the gardens?” Viviane asked, turning her eyes on Lucien. 

“Beautiful, as always.” Lucien replied, bringing a piece of potato to his mouth.

“So pleased you thought so.” Viviane was smiling at him in a way that Lucien had trouble deciphering. He watched as she linked her hand through Kallias’ and set both of them on the table between the two. 

“Did you not expect that to be my answer?”

She smiled knowing at him. “I like that Elain thought to dress for dinner.”

“She needed to change.” He told her, “Needed some dry clothes.”

“Yes,” Vivian remarked softly so as not to be overheard, “One tends to get a bit wet on their knees in the snow.”

Lucien’s eyes flicked directly to Elain, but it seemed as if she had not heard them. Her eyes were still on the vase in front of her as she worked her way through her dinner. Looking back to Viviane he raised an eyebrow. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

“I’m sure you are.” The Lady of the Winter Court stretched a little, rolling her neck slightly and adjusting her shoulders and posture. “Have I ever told you that Kal and I have a great view of the Eisblume garden from our chamber? It’s really quite stunning at sunset.”

Lucien kept his face carefully neutral. “I did not know that.” He said, his tone conversational. Viviane grinned at him, as wicked as any white fox.

“We like our view, don’t we Kal?”

“Very much.” Kallias put in, turning his own eyes on Lucien. “We spend a lot of time at that window, and have a nice little setup with cushions for …reading, and …other activities.”

Lucien picked up his goblet, taking a long drink of water. He was glad that Elain wasn’t listening because he didn’t know how she would react to the knowledge that Kallias and Viviane had seen what they had done out in that garden while at the window for their own lascivious adventures. “Sorry.” He murmured, knowing that it was indeed quite inappropriate to come to their court and do something like that. He hoped they wouldn’t tell anyone.

“Not at all.” Kallias replied easily, “In fact, Viv and I have organised something for you for after dinner. Elain, do you want to know what it is?”

Lucien felt Elain turn toward them. “Oh?”

“It will be waiting for you outside when you’ve finished eating.”

“So you’re not even going to tell us?” Lucian asked, grinning despite himself. 

“It’s a surprise.” Viviane smiled brightly at them. “You’re welcome.”

Lucien looked around to Elain who was eyeing him in turn. “What have they done?” she murmured and he shook his head.

“I have no idea.”

“Do you like the Eisblume?” Kallias asked and Elain smiled brightly at the High Lord, nodding.

“They are the most stunning flowers I have ever seen.”

“There’s nothing like them in all of Prythian.” Kallias told her. “A perfect entry for your flower book, I presume.”

“Oh, yes.” Elain agreed, flashing a smile at Lucien before looking back to Kallias. “They are exactly the type of thing I had in mind when I came up with the idea.” Lucien could feel the excitement coming off of Elain in waves. He wanted to touch her, but resisted, not wanting to draw her attention back to him. Instead he just watched her, letting her have her moment, her excitement, letting her experience this place, the faeries here, and see that she could engage with them, with this life. Lucien listened to Elain talking with Kallias about the flowers while they continued to eat dinner. 

By the time they had finished, the hall was nearly empty and Elain took his hand as they headed for the doors themselves. 

“Remember.” Viviane said to them, “Just outside…”

“How could we forget?” Lucien replied, smiling at the Lady of the Winter Court. He wrapped an arm around Elain’s shoulders and took her outside.

“I feel like we will need cloaks…” Elain’s voice suggested she were already cold, and Lucien pulled her closer. He had been about to suggest they go and retrieve their cloaks first, but then his gaze caught on what Viviane and Kallias had arranged for them.

Elain made a high pitched sound at the sight of the pair of white reindeer and she made to head straight for them, evidently intending to give them the petting he had no doubt they would love, but Lucien held more tightly to her. “Oh, where do you think you’re going?” he grinned and she looked up at him with a small pout. Lucien pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose and indicated with a tilt of his head the sleigh that was awaiting them.

A small faerie with translucent wings and a large furred coat sat holding the reins. The faerie sat staring straight ahead and Lucien had the distinct impression that while the faerie would drive the sleigh for them, he would give them no conversation. Stepping up into the sleigh, Lucien then turned to help Elain up with him. The moment she was standing beside him, he bent to pick up a heavy fur blanket from the pile of similar coats and blankets and cushions awaiting them. 

Lucien spent a moment draping the seat in the blankets before he lifted a large cosy looking coat and stood to wrap it around Elain. She smiled at him as he did it up in the front, and he pressed a quick kiss to her cheek before helping her onto the seat as he dropped beside her. Grabbing one of the larger blankets, Lucien had just wrapped it around both Elain and himself, folding it over their laps to keep them both warm when he noticed Viviane and Kallias suddenly standing beside the sleigh, watching them. They had seemingly appeared out of the snow and Lucien nearly jumped in shock.

“Are you comfortable and warm?” Viviane asked, and Lucien felt Elain nod beside him. “Good…”

“You will be taken up to the ridge,” Kallias explained, “There is an exquisite view of the valley and of the palace from up there. Then, it will be back through the forest and around the exterior gardens.”

“The Aurora should be bright tonight.” Viviane put in, and Kallias nodded. 

“Also, should you feel cold…” The High Lord reached forward and opened a small box, and Lucien could see mugs and a flask inside. “Hot chocolate is quite effective.”

“And delicious.” Viviane added, smiling at them.

“You organised all of this?” Elain sounded surprised, and Lucien couldn’t blame her. 

“Of course.” Kallias said, stepping back from the sleigh and slipping an arm around his wife. “Let it never be said that guests to the Winter Court aren’t given the full experience.”

“Oh, we would never say that…” Lucien bit back a smile and Kallias’ pale eyes flicked up to meet his own. 

“Have a good evening.” The High Lord smiled at them and then turned and led Viviane back inside.

“What are they expecting?” Elain whispered, looking around and up at Lucien who shook his head, “Do they think we’re going to come back mated?” Something tugged at his heart and Lucien made a face. 

“I don’t know.” He murmured, “Maybe.”

Elain leaned into him and he relaxed again, wrapping an arm around her inside the blanket as the sleigh lurched into action. Elain looked up to the sky as the snow fell around them in quick flurries and Lucien moved to lift the hood of her coat up over her hair. She turned to smile at him and he watched as her dark eyes looked him over for a moment. 

“Here…” Elain bent and then lifted a scarf from the pile of blankets and coats. She turned and began wrapping it carefully around Lucien’s neck, tucking the edges under the blanket to prevent any cold air getting in. He smiled at her, taking her hand and tucking it under the blanket with his own.

It didn’t take them long to reach the ridge Kallias had mentioned and Lucien found himself at a slight loss for words, looking out across the valley and at the stunning lights of the palace. 

“How is it even more beautiful at night?” Elain breathed, and Lucien stroked his thumb across her hand beneath the blanket. “The lights reflect off the snow and the ice… it’s like a sea of lights…”

“You make it sound even lovelier.” He told her, his eyes lifting toward the sky when green light erupted over them. Elain gasped and he glanced at her, smiling at the awe he found on her face.

“Have you seen this before?” she asked, turning her eyes on him and Lucien nodded.

“The Aurora dances every night here…”

“How is this place real?” Elain’s eyes went back to the sky before returning to Lucien once more. “I’m so glad we came here.”

“As am I.” Lucien said softly. He really was. Before he had returned to Velaris, he hardly would have dared dream he would have the chance at so much time alone with Elain, let alone have the chance to travel Prythian with her. He loved getting to have these moments with her, share these experiences, and he loved getting to see her experience the beauty of their world. He loved that she didn’t just go through life without truly seeing what was around her. Elain saw the beauty in everything, noticed the detail, and took joy from what she saw. He watched her now, a wide smile across her face, as she watched the Aurora above them flickering green and purple.

“You’re looking at me.” She said, her eyes still on the sky.

“Can’t help myself.” Lucien replied, still watching her face. “The way you look at everything…” Elain turned toward him, her eyes moving over his face, “I was so bored with the prospect of immortality,” he told her, “A long and lonely existence where one thing blurred into another… But you see the world. You see beauty worth noting in the petals of a flower…”

“All the more beautiful because its life is fleeting.” Elain commented and Lucien nodded.

“I could never be bored with that existence.” He murmured, “I love that you’ve brought that to my life.”

Elain untangled her hand from the blanket and brought her fingers to Lucien’s cheek, ghosting over his scar. “The dancing light is reflecting off you eye…” she told him softly and Lucien blinked, “It’s beautiful.”

“I’m glad you think so.”

“I do.” She dropped her hand to the scarf around his neck, gathering the tails together and gently pulling him toward her. Lucien knew what she wanted and he smiled, all too willing to comply. He slipped his own hand into her hood and around to the back of her neck, drawing her to him as he brought his lips down to meet hers. Her lips were cold but, when she parted them, her tongue was warm, and Lucien pressed on quickly deepening the kiss as he just about pulled her into his lap.

“Are you cold?” Lucien asked when he felt Elain shudder.

“You can warm me up.” She replied, grinning at him. Lucien raised an eyebrow at her, and then leaned toward the box Kallias had opened earlier. He pulled out the mugs and flask, and poured some hot chocolate. Pressing one of the mugs into Elain’s hand he watched as she lifted it to her lips for a small sip. Her hands were beginning to shake and Lucien told the faerie in the driver’s seat that they would do well to begin heading back to the palace. 

Drawing Elain closer to his side, Lucien tucked his arm back around her as they headed back down off the ridge. The air became marginally more chill as they moved through the thick forest, and Lucien watched as Elain cradled the warm mug in her hands. She glanced at him, as if sensing him watching her, and she leaned further into him, resting her head against him comfortably. Closing his eyes for a moment, Lucien flicked a little of his power into the coat Elain wore, ensuring that it would keep her warm and she smiled up at him. “Thank you.”

He pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, holding her closer. “Watch for the emergence of the palace as we come out of the trees…”

“It’s like a dream.” Elain said softly when the shining palace came into view. The aurora seemed to reflect off a million ice crystals and the colours from the sky appeared to disappear into the snow around them. Lucien nodded, rubbing his hand up and down her arm as he held her to himself. He was pretty sure he’d dreamed of this a hundred times.


	62. Chapter Sixty-Two

**Chapter 62**

Several large vases of Eisblume were scattered around their room, and Lucien smiled. He made a mental note to thank Kallias in the morning as he watched Elain’s eyes light up at the sight. She hurried toward the closest vase, turning it on the table to a more advantageous angle. “I wish there was a way to take some of these when we go… I wish I could grow them…”

“Yeah, I don’t think that’ll work, Petal.” He said, draping the blanket from the sleigh over a nearby chair. “The seeds Tam gave you may grow in the Night Court, but I don’t think Eisblume will grow anywhere but here.”

“I figured.” She murmured, sighing a little. “I’m going to have a quick bath before bed…”

“Alright.”

Lucien sat down at a table to write a quick report on the Winter Court for Rhysand while Elain headed into the bathroom. He had finished and was packing everything away when she came out in a long white nightgown. His eyes caught on her, moving slowly over her from head to foot. The light nightgown wasn’t _quite_ transparent, but the material was thin enough that he could nearly see through it. Elain didn’t pause as she moved toward the bed, but the smile she wore as she glanced at him told Lucien she knew exactly what he was thinking. 

“I… am going to do the same thing.” He told her, grabbing what he needed before heading swiftly into the bathroom. He stripped off and washed quickly in the tub, eager to get back out into the bedroom; to get to Elain.

Striding back out into the bedroom in record time, Lucien found Elain sitting in bed, propped up against several pillows with a book in her lap. “All clean?” she asked, smiling at him as he approached. Lucien bit back a reply, questioning if she preferred him dirty, and just nodded as he pulled the covers back and slipped into the bed beside her. “Here…” Elain shuffled closer, until she was leaning against him instead of the pillows. Contentment flowed through Lucien as Elain’s head rested against his chest, and she flicked the book open in her lap. “My turn to read to you.”

“Oh?” He asked, “Alright.”

“Okay, get comfortable.”

“I am.” He grinned, sliding an arm around her waist, holding her firmly to himself as she began to read. It was the book he had begun to read to her and, although Lucien had read it before, he listened happily. He liked her voice, soft and soothing, and he found himself gently playing with the end of her braid with the hand not currently at her waist.

After a while, Elain tilted her head to look up at him. “You’re quite distracting…” she said softly, and Lucien realised that he had been stroking her steadily. He grinned, stilling his hand.

“Sorry…”

“No…” she smiled, setting the book aside, “It was nice…”

“Was it?” he began stroking her again with his hand at her waist, his fingers moving slowly across the thin material of her nightgown. “Like this…?”

“Exactly.” She grinned at him, “Do I get to do it too?”

“Petal, you can do whatever you want…” Lucien’s breath caught in his throat when she shifted and turned, lifting herself over him until she was straddling him. “By the Cauldron…” he groaned, unable to look away from her leaning over him, the aurora lighting up the sky outside, easily visible through the windows behind her.

“Really? Anything I want?” She asked, and he could do nothing but look up at her, nodding his agreement. She looked back at him, her brown eyes flicking over him and coming to rest on his chest. “… you told me once that you usually don’t sleep in clothes…” She plucked at the shirt he had on. 

“True…”

“Well…” she pulled at the shirt again, looking at him questioningly. 

“Petal, you want it gone, it’s gone…” Lucien could practically see Elain considering before she nodded. He sat up quickly pulling the shirt up and over his head before tossing it away. The smile that spread across her face then sent a flush of heat right through him and both of his hands came to rest on her thighs as he settled back against the pillows again. He watched Elain hesitate for only a moment before her hands came to his chest, sliding carefully over his skin. Colour filled her cheeks then when she met his eyes and Lucien ran his own hands over her thighs. “…. Earlier,” he began, watching her expression carefully, “Did you like it?”

“Earlier…” she mused, “… the sleigh?”

“Before that.” He said, and her wide smile told him she knew exactly what he was referring to. “Out among the Eisblume.”

“I liked…” she paused for a second, “I liked that I could unravel you…” 

“Oh… you can at that.” He raised an eyebrow at her, “You make me come completely undone.”

Elain smiled and leaned forward to kiss him, her hands braced against his bare chest, and Lucien slid his own hands from her thighs up to her waist. When she sat straight again, he allowed his eyes to wander over her. The thin nightgown was practically translucent from this close, and he lifted one hand to her cheek, caressing her gently, his thumb trailing along her cheekbone as she leaned into his touch. “I enjoyed every moment of today…” he told her and Elain nodded. 

Carefully, Lucien allowed his hand to slide down Elain’s throat, trailing his fingers over her skin to the garnet necklace she still wore. Pleasure washed through him as he looked at the garnet stones sitting against her soft skin, and he thought about what it meant that she didn’t seem to have taken the necklace off since he had put it on her back in the Autumn Court. Keeping his eyes on her face, Lucien let his hand trace lower until it came to the laces at the front of her nightgown. When she didn’t make any kind of protest, he began to slowly untie them. Noting the deeper breath Elain took, Lucien paused. After everything they had done, he’d almost forgotten that he hadn’t actually seen her naked. Knowing that modesty was important to her, he waited for her decision. Elain met his eyes as she bit her lip. Nodding, she lifted one of her own hands to rest over his and Lucien carefully opened the front of her nightgown enough to slip a hand inside.

Elain’s breath came more quickly as he gently caressed one of her breasts. He kept his touch light, merely ghosting his fingers across her until she leaned in to kiss him again. Bringing his other hand up to the back of Elain’s neck, Lucien pulled her more firmly into the kiss and Elain’s hands moved up his chest again before sliding across to his shoulders. Lucien groaned when he felt her hips begin to move as she began rubbing herself against him. She sat up again then, and he could see the desire in her eyes. Slowly, she lifted her hands to the laces on her nightgown, untying them further before allowing the whole thing to fall from her shoulders.

_Mate. Touch her, smell her, taste her-_

Elain’s dark eyes were firmly on his own and Lucien could see her trying to read him. He was unable to help himself from allowing his gaze to drop, moving so very slowly over her and he could see when her breathing quickened again. Gently, he ran both hands over her, his eyes lifting to meet her gaze once more as his heart began to beat loudly in his own ears, and Lucien knew that she would definitely be able to hear it too. Elain leaned into his touch as his thumbs traced her ribs and shifted higher and he heard her soft gasp of a breath, saw her lips part slightly, and her hips shifted again. Lucien gave another groan, “Is this what you want to be doing, Petal?”

*

Watching as Lucien’s eyes moved over her, Elain bit her lip. His metallic eye clicked and whirred and she could see him trying to maintain his control. She had the choice. He’d given it to her, and she could make that decision here and now. “Here?” she asked, thinking about what he had said the other night. One of his hands cupped her breast and she closed her eyes, “I thought you didn’t want some random bed…”

“I… like it here…” his voice was weaker than before and Elain thought that control might be slipping. He had told her that he wanted this to happen somewhere more meaningful to them, somewhere they had complete privacy and where they wouldn’t be disturbed. She doubted they would be disturbed here, but it was hardly meaningful. 

One of Lucien’s hands slid up between her breasts and to her throat and she opened her eyes to meet his again. “I want you…” she murmured, and she heard his heartbeat quicken. “I want this before I accept the bond…”

“Okay…”

“I want to know my own mind, know it’s us… and I don’t want to be a virgin when the mating frenzy hits…”

Lucien was nodding now, his eyes still moving over her and his hands both stroking her. “Alright…” One of his hands slid around to her lower back and Elain shook her head, her breath coming quick and shallow. He had told her that he wanted somewhere meaningful, and she didn’t want him to give that up now because she had tempted him. That wasn’t fair, and it felt manipulative. “No?” he asked, and Elain met his eyes again. He was watching her, clearly trying to read her expression. “Elain?” Both of his hands came down to her thighs, and he began stroking her again, slow and soothing.

Trying to think about somewhere that wouldn’t be random for him, Elain’s mind went back to his room in Tamlin’s manor. Lucien had lived there for so long, and she remembered the way he had decorated the room. The whole thing had felt like him, had smelled like him. That had been his last home. Lifting one of her hands, she gently touched Lucien’s cheek, trailing her fingers down his scar to his jaw. “Can we go back to the Spring Court?”

Lucien’s hands stilled on her thighs and he tilted his head as he looked up at her. “Is that what you want?”

“Yes…”

“Alright.”

Elain leaned down to kiss him again and felt him smile softly “Is that okay?” she asked, shifting herself so that she was laying atop him. 

“Perfect.” He murmured, “We will have privacy there… and…” she felt him press a kiss to her hair, “That’s where you first came to me because you didn’t want to sleep alone…”

“I remember.”

“When do you want to go?” Lucien asked softly, “Before we head to Summer?”

“I’d go now if we could.” Elain murmured, resting her cheek against Lucien’s hot chest. She felt his laugh before his hands came to her bare back, trailing gentle patterns into her skin as he held her. 

“Soon enough, Petal.” He replied and Elain nodded, closing her eyes comfortably. After a few moments, she shifted herself to the side and off of Lucien. He made a soft sound of protest until she snuggled closely into his side, her head coming back to rest against his chest, and her hand moving again over his skin, unable to help herself. She stay there like that, feeling sleep sneak closer, and not caring about the fact that her nightgown was still bunched around her waist, leaving her bare. Lucien’s fingers were still tracing gentle patterns into her skin, up and down her back, and she wasn’t moving again until morning.


	63. Chapter Sixty-Three

**Chapter 63**

Awaking well into the morning, Elain yawned and stretched, wrapping her arms around Lucien when she felt him next to her. She heard him make a contented sound and she opened her eyes, peering up at him. He looked back at her with a sleepy smile and Elain pushed herself up on her elbow to see him better. 

“It’s late…” she said softly and Lucien nodded, propping himself up against the pillows, one of his hands coming up to gently brush her hair back from her face.

“I don’t think anyone will be looking for us.”

“That’s good.” Elain replied, enjoying the sensation of his fingers moving through her hair. “I need to get back out into that garden to choose some flowers…”

Lucien smiled at her. “Rhys was meant to send word today about when we are to be due in the Summer Court.”

“I feel like that is going to be a shock…” She murmured, “Going from Winter to Summer so quickly.”

“You’re probably right.” His fingers kept moving through her hair, “Although, stopping in Spring might make it easier.”

Elain felt herself blush, remembering what they had decided upon last night. “Ah.”

“That is, if you still want to do that…”

“I do.” She really did think that choosing the place Lucien had lived for so long, the place that had been a home to him, was the best decision. 

“You sure?” he asked, his fingers massaging into the back of her neck, “Just because I said that I didn’t want it to happen in some random bed doesn’t mean that we need to choose somewhere now…”

Elain pushed herself higher to meet his eyes. “I don’t want to wait anymore.”

Lucien’s metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked at her. “I just don’t want to have pushed it…”

“You haven’t.” she told him, “I know that you haven’t… I know that you’ve done everything you can to not push me.” Lucien nodded and she smiled at him. “Now, this is something we both want…”

She watched something flicker through Lucien’s russet eye, although she couldn’t quite place what it was. He wasn’t sending anything down the bond toward her either, and she tilted her head, wondering what he was thinking. “Alright.” He replied softly.

“… You do still want it, don’t you?” Uncertainty scratched at her, as she was still unable to read his expression.

“Oh, Petal.” He smiled widely at her, his hand moving through her hair again. “For so very long now.”

She nodded slowly, pushing herself up into a sitting position. “Good…”

*

Lucien took the letter Kallias offered him. “From Rhys?” he asked the High Lord who nodded. 

“It arrived during breakfast. I would have given it straight to you, but you were… missing.”

“Awoke late…” Lucien murmured, ignoring the smile Kallias gave him as he opened the letter and scanned the contents. “We’re not due in Summer for a week…”

“Oh.” Kallias smiled again, “You’re welcome to stay here.”

“Thank you.” Lucien glanced at the other male. “Elain needs to complete her collection for her book, but then we were going to head to the Spring Court.”

“I thought you had already spoken with Tamlin.”

“Yes, we have…”

“You’re going back for another reason?”

“…Yes.”

“Ohh…” Kallias gave Lucien a knowing smile and Lucien focused his attention on folding the letter carefully several times and slipping it into his pocket. If the High Lord was so keen on knowing such private details, maybe Lucien could put that interest and knowledge to good use. 

“You told me that your mating bond with Viviane snapped into place while you were… intimate…”

“Yes.” Kallias lifted a hand to his white blonde hair. “It did.”

Lucien nodded. “… did it change how you were?”

“Interesting question…”

“I just…” Lucien let out a huff, his eyes sweeping the room in case anyone else was around and listening, “I’m… concerned…”

“About what?”

“Not being able to control it.”

Kallias’ blue eyes were serious as he met Lucien’s gaze. “What do you mean?”

“I already fight to keep it under control.” He murmured, “Just about every time my hands are on her, I’m trying to keep it leashed, and I’m scared that if I loosen that leash… I…”

“It was not the same for us.” Kallias said softly and Lucien nodded, “We began before the bond…”

“But were you different then?” Lucien asked, “Did it change you, drive you? Were you…” Lucien broke off, not knowing what he wanted to say. He glanced again at Kallias when a hand came to rest gently on his arm.

“When the bond took hold, I was… more attuned to Viviane…” The High Lord said softly, “I… seemed to know what she wanted… what pleased her…”

“Okay…”

“It’s not the frenzy.” Kallias told him, “The need for you will be greater than it would have been without the bond, but you won’t lose yourself.” There was a pause as pale eyes ran over Lucien. “You won’t hurt her.”

Lucien relaxed a little. “Okay…” He liked the sound of that. It would only be an advantage to be so attuned to Elain, to be able to read what she needed. “I… just thought that because it’s been something I’ve been fighting to control so far it would only get worse in that situation.”

“But you’ll be giving it what it wants. You wont be fighting it. If anything, it will be easier.”

“That’s true…” Lucien murmured. “I hadn’t considered that.”

“No part of you is ever going to hurt Elain.” Kallias told him, “Even when the frenzy hits. It’s not always like the violent stories everyone enjoys telling. If you’re not like that by nature, then you won’t be like that then.”

“I had heard something similar.” Lucien replied. “That’s good to know.” He gave a smile to the other male. “Thank you…”

*

Having learned her lesson about kneeling in the snow the previous day, Elain had brought a blanket out into the garden with her this time. She spread it before the large hellebore plant that had caught her eye, before kneeling down on it, and then she pulled the small book from her pocket and opened it to a new page before selecting a flower to begin sketching. Time passed quickly, and Elain found that this was getting easier than when she had first begun. She was still no artist, especially compared with what Feyre could do with paint, but she thought that she was at least getting better. 

“The blanket is a good idea.”

“Yeah.” Elain looked around as Viviane dropped down beside her. The Lady of the Winter Court’s pale eyes dropped to the book in Elain’s hands and she tilted her head. 

“How long does it usually take you to complete what you want from a court?”

“It depends.” Elain replied, “Usually no more than a couple of days.”

“How many have you done here?”

“Two.”

“Ah, so you have a bit of work to do.”

“I sure do.”

“So, did you enjoy last night?” Viviane asked, “Up on the ridge…?”

“It was stunning.” Elain replied, giving her a smile. “Thank you for organising that… I have never seen anything that… resplendent.”

“The Aurora put on a good show for you, too.”

“It was magical.” Elain added a few more lines to her sketch.

“…did it lead to a further magical evening?”

“What?” Elain glanced at Viviane in surprise, was she seriously asking Elain if she and Lucien had had sex? “What do you mean?”

Viviane gave a low chuckle. “Did it bring you closer?” She asked, “Are you closer to accepting the bond?”

“Oh.” Elain tilted her head, looking back to her sketch. “Yes, I suppose so.” She added a bit of shading to the sketch, “We decided that we will spend some time in the Spring Court before we head to the Summer Court.”

“Hmm…” Viviane indicated a Snow Drop flower coming up near the edge of Elain’s blanket and Elain began to draw it. “I take it there’s a reason you’re going back there.”

“Yes.” Elain glanced sideways at the other female, “I… why do you care so much?” She cringed at how rude the question sounded, but she really didn’t understand why Viviane was so focused on her relationship with Lucien.

Viviane paused for a moment before speaking softly. “I am sorry if I have pried too closely…”

“No, I just … want to know why you’re interested.”

“I don’t know that there is any specific reason.” Vivian told her, “Finding one’s mate is a rare occurrence, as I’m sure you have been told. It’s special, and very sad when it doesn’t work. Aside from that, you know that I have known Lucien for a long time, and I truly want him to have something go right in his life… It’s wonderful that he has found his mate, and it’s even more wonderful that you are kind and lovely…” Vivian paused for a moment, “Even all that aside, it’s clear to anyone watching the two of you that you love one another. So, if I can help you both take that next step toward accepting the bond and being as happy as Kal and I are, then I… I just want to see that…”

“Who would have thought the Lady of the Winter Court and her High Lord would be so warm…?”

Vivian gave another soft laugh. “The inside of our palace is nothing but fireplaces and furnaces.”

Elain was silent for several minutes as she worked on her sketch. “The Spring Court was Lucien’s home for a long time.” She said gently, “His room in the manor is still the way he left it. Those personal touches are still there… it still feels like his space… We thought that would be a good place for… moving our relationship along.”

“That makes sense.” Viviane replied kindly, “His instincts will want to have you somewhere he feels is his…”

Elain nodded in understanding. “He’ll be possessive…”

“He already is.” Viviane told her. “You already know who he is. What you feel through that bond…” Vivian smiled at her, “You’ll be thankful for it, trust me.” Elain blinked, her eyes moving over Viviane as she tried to process those words. “When that connection shows you what he’s feeling… And you know what it feels like to be able to feel the mattress against your back while he moves inside you, but then all of a sudden you also know how good it feels to _be_ inside of you…”

Elain’s eyes widened and she felt herself blush slightly, quickly returning her attention to her sketch.


	64. Chapter Sixty-Four

**Chapter 64**

It took Elain the rest of the day to finish what she needed for her book and it wasn’t until that evening at the dinner table that she told Lucien that she had what she needed. He had told Kallias that they would be heading for the Spring Court the next morning, and he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since. Elain had been quiet, and he knew that it was weighing on her mind just as much as it was on his. 

They had gone to bed, curled up against one another as had become their norm, but Lucien had lay awake as his mind swirled with what they were going to do. He had built this up, and he didn’t know what he needed to do now that it had become so important. What Kallias had told him did ease his worry, and he had tightened his arm around Elain as she slept. It didn’t matter how much he overthought this whole situation, every time he had Elain in his arms, everything became easy and natural.

By morning, Lucien had begun to think of things they could tell Tamlin about why they had come back to his court. He hadn’t come up with anything too great and, when he noticed that Elain was awake, he decided to ask her. 

“I’m assuming you don’t want to give him the real reason…” He murmured when she raised an eyebrow at him. 

“I’d really rather not…”

“Then what should we tell him?” Lucien let a hand move through her soft hair, stroking back the stray locks that had come loose from her night braid. 

“Well, I’m assuming we will be doing other things while there…” Her voice was soft and Lucien nodded, “I do want to choose a flower from that glade…” 

“The one I used to visit, and that you dreamed of?”

“Yes.” Elain slid closer to him, “I want to include a flower from there in the book… We can tell him that.” Lucien smiled wider at her.

“I might have a suggestion for which to choose…” He thought of the many, many, times he had gone to that glade. He had spent so long there wishing that whatever promise the glade had been making would come to be. He was certain now that that promise had always been Elain, and he could see in his mind the blue flowers he had always felt drawn to. 

“You do?” He could see the interest in her dark eyes, feel her curiosity, and Lucien winked at her. 

“They’re blue.”

“Ah…” Elain’s eyes shifted and he could see her trying to remember the flowers she had seen in the glade when they had been there. He knew that she couldn’t quite decide when she frowned lightly. “What are they?”

“I don’t know.” He told her, “I don’t know what they’re called, but they always made me feel better…”

“Okay.” She pushed herself into a sitting position. “I look forward to you showing them to me.” 

Watching Elain, Lucien was also looking forward to showing those little blue flowers to her. He was looking forward to sitting in that glade with her while she sketched them for her book. Deciding that he would have to remember to take snacks, Lucien rather hoped that it would be like when they had used to sit out in the garden in the Night Court. He had missed that easy, innocent, time with her. Not that he would give up moments like these, he thought. Never in all of eternity. 

Kallias and Viviane had taken them to where Lucien could winnow them and then they’d jumped step by step toward the Spring Court and Tamlin’s manor. Lucien was beyond exhausted by the time they had arrived and he was grateful for Elain’s supporting arm around his waist as they staggered up the steps to the door. 

“It’s dinner…” he murmured, and Elain nodded, walking with him up the hallway toward the dining room. 

Tamlin raised an eyebrow when they entered the room and Lucien tried to stand a little straighter. He dropped his pack by the door, and a moment later Elain set hers beside his. 

“You’ve returned…” Tamlin’s voice held the question he wanted to ask and Lucien nodded.

“You did say we were welcome…”

“I did.” His friend waved a hand at the empty seats at the table. “Join me…” Lucien didn’t miss the eager way Elain moved forward, taking up the same chair she had claimed when they had last visited. “So what brings you back so soon?”

“Couple of things.” Lucien replied, “Elain is after a flower that grows near here I was telling her about. She wants to include it in her book.”

“Which one?”

“I… don’t know what it’s called.” Lucien shrugged, “It’s blue…”

Tamlin raised an eyebrow at him again. “Helpful.”

“You’re the High Lord of Spring.” Lucien muttered, picking up a golden goblet from in front of him, “I just lived here…”

“If I brought one back, would you know its name?” Elain asked Tamlin, hope in her voice. 

Tamlin nodded, turning his green eyes her way. “Yes.”

Elain’s happy eyes turned toward Lucien and she gave him a smile. “Tomorrow we’ll have to do that.”

“As you wish, Petal.” His gaze shifted back to Tamlin, “That is, if we’re allowed to stay…”

“You may stay.” Tamlin replied giving a single nod of his head, “I said before that you were welcome, and it holds.”

Elain’s pretty smile flashed Lucien’s way and he met her gaze again for a moment before looking back to Tamlin yet again. “Thank you. We appreciate that.”

“Do you still require two rooms?”

“Ah…” 

“One will do.” Elain said simply, “We will stay in Lucien’s old room… unless you object.”

Lucien couldn’t help but stare at her. He had not expected her to be so forthright. Tamlin’s green eyes flickered between Elain and Lucien, and Lucien did not miss the amused look in his friend’s eyes, or the fact that Tamlin seemed to be resisting a smile of his own.

“I have no objection.” Tamlin turned his attention back to Lucien who began filling his plate with dishes sitting near to him. “You have been collecting flowers from the other courts?” Tamlin asked and Elain nodded, reaching into her pocket and pulling out the small book. She then passed it to Tamlin who carefully opened it and began leafing through the pages. “These are quite interesting…” he remarked, “Oh, the Eisblume…”

“That is one of my favourites.” Elain said, “I wish that every court had an equivalent.”

“Unfortunately, it is quite unique.” Tamlin replied. “No doubt that makes it all the more beautiful.”

Elain nodded her agreement, and Lucien watched her select several pieces of a nearby honey loaf to add to her plate. He ate his own dinner quickly, feeling more and more exhausted with every minute that passed. All that winnowing had really taken it out of him, and he found himself longing for his bed. He wanted to get upstairs and curl up with Elain so that he could get some rest. Despite what they had come here for, Lucien didn’t think anything would be happening between them tonight. He was far too exhausted, and he hoped that Elain would understand that he was probably capable of little more than a quick bath and collapsing into bed before he fell asleep. They didn’t have to be in the Summer Court for another week. They had plenty of time.

*

Elain sat on Lucien’s bed, in her nightgown, pulling her hairbrush through her hair as she waited. She was pleased that Tamlin had seemed friendly when they had arrived, if not a little surprised and she was thankful that he had let them stay. Perhaps he and Lucien really could mend their friendship. Tomorrow, she would pay more attention to the way the two of them interacted, and see where they were and if she might do anything to assist the process. Glancing at the bathroom door, Elain braided her hair for bed. Lucien had gone to have a bath quite a while ago, but she had expected him to be back by now. As she fastened the end of her braid, she listened for his heartbeat. It was there, slow and steady and she got to her feet. 

Approaching the door, Elain listened more intently. “Lucien?” she called softly. Then, not hearing a reply, she pressed her ear to the door. “Lucien?”

There was no reply again and Elain frowned. He wouldn’t just ignore her. Biting her lip, Elain reached for the door handle and turned it carefully. The door opened a little and she peered in.

“Lucien?”

He was still in the tub, resting his head back against the side, his eyes closed, and Elain walked hesitantly into the room, smiling when she realised that he was asleep. Grabbing a towel, she approached the tub. She knew that he had been tired after winnowing them so far, so she wasn’t entirely surprised. “Lucien?” She lay the towel, folded, on the side of the tub, reaching out to touch his hair. He stirred slightly and Elain stepped around the end of the tub, behind him. 

“Hmm?” 

“You’re exhausted…” Elain ran her fingers through his hair, gathering it together. 

“Mmm…” She saw him lift a wet hand to run over his face. “I am.”

Running her fingers through his hair again to ensure that there were no tangles, Elain began to carefully braid it. She enjoyed watching the ruby strands slide between her fingers, and she wished that her own hair was as beautiful a colour. “It’s alright.” She told him, “We’ll get you in to bed and you can sleep properly. It will be more comfortable than in the bath.”

“Okay.” His response was murmured softly and Elain secured the braid as he reached for the towel. Realising that he was about to stand up, she turned quickly away. Wondering why that had been her reaction considering the things they had done, Elain paused. Then, deciding that even if mates were as close as possible and even if they lived together practically naked, giving one another deserved privacy was a good thing, she headed for the door. She would return to the bedroom, and get ready for bed, and Lucien could join her when he was ready. 

Elain had been settled in bed for no more than a minute when Lucien staggered into the room, his towel wrapped around his waist. She just watched him approach the bed, already looking half asleep again. He reached for the covers before he hesitated. He glanced at her and then moved to pull on a pair of loose pants, tossing the towel onto a nearby chair by the fire. When he practically dropped onto the bed, Elain wondered how he’d even had the strength to stand at all. She scooted closer to him, reaching out to lightly touch his shoulder. Lucien didn’t so much as lift his head to look at her, and Elain lifted her fingers to his hair, tracing the braid to its end. 

When he shifted his arm then, his hand coming out to her, Elain took it gently. His fingers wrapped around hers and he went still again. Listening to his heartbeat slow and take on a steady beat, she knew that he had drifted into sleep again and she slid down next to him, her hand still in his, as she sought to do the same.


	65. Chapter Sixty-Five

**Chapter 65**

Lucien had awoken early and, finding Elain still asleep, he slipped quietly from bed and got dressed before heading outside for a walk. The sun had not yet completely risen, but he was full of energy and thought that if he took himself out to one of the old roads he had used during his patrols, he might be able to work a bit of it off before he had to properly begin the day. 

He found the surrounding areas much the same as when he had used to live in the manor, if slightly less populated, and he wondered where everyone had gone. To which courts, he wondered, had they fled?

Turning his mind to the coming hours, Lucien tried to work out what to do. He wanted to ensure that Elain had a pleasing day before the evening. He knew that tonight, when he took her to bed, he would be able to give into the driving urge that had been pushing him ever since he had discovered that she was his mate. Yes, he knew that was coming. They had a whole day to get through first, however. He would take her to the glade, he decided. She wanted to see the blue flower he had spoken of, and that would take at least a few hours if they took some food and books with them. They had been able to spend hours in the garden together at the Night Court, so he knew that it would only be too easy to do in that glade. There were many flowers there she could inspect, and he did want to continue reading that book with her.

Once he had decided on a course of action, Lucien headed back to the manor. He knew that breakfast would be in motion in the dining hall, so he headed for the kitchens first. Some of the kitchen staff were faeries he knew and remembered and, with only a few quick smiles, he was able to talk them into preparing a small basket of sandwiches and cakes. Then, once he had what he needed, Lucien ran upstairs to collect the book and a blanket. Elain and Tamlin were in the dining room, as predicted, when he returned and Lucien smiled as he strode in and saw Elain’s head whip around instantly. 

“There you are…” she said, and he saw her eyes shift over him from head to foot as if assessing. 

“I went for a walk.” He told her, striding toward the table and taking up his usual seat. “I hope you weren’t too worried.”

“Not worried…” she replied, her eyes still moving over him, “Just…”

“Sorry.” He gave her a slow smile, “I would have told you, but I didn’t want to wake you.” She nodded, looking back to her plate and Lucien noticed her book open on the table beside her. “Working already?” he asked, and she nodded. 

“Tamlin was telling me more about the flowers I’d chosen from his gardens last time.”

“Oh?” Lucien looked toward the High Lord who gave a nod of his own. “Well,” Lucien continued, looking back to Elain, “If you’re ready to add another… I’ve collected everything we need for a little walk.”

Elain’s brown eyes lifted to meet his gaze and her pretty lips quirked in a smile. “…what do we need?” she asked softly. 

“Maybe you’ll have to wait until we get there…” He felt the curiosity swirling off of her, and he couldn’t help his own wide smile as he looked back at her.

“Where are you heading?” Tamlin asked, and Lucien flicked a glance at him. 

“Not too far.” He replied. He’d never spoken to his friend about the glade he had so often visited. It had seemed he should keep it a secret, a place just for him. He was happy to share that with Elain, but he wasn’t about to tell Tamlin about it. Not now. Not yet.

“When will we leave?” Elain asked. 

“As soon as you’re ready.”

Elain got to her feet, slipping her book into her pocket as she did so and then looked at him expectantly. “… We will need a blanket.” She said, “If I’m going to sit for so long to draw this flower…” 

“Already taken care of, Petal.” Lucien enjoyed the smile he was rewarded with and then pushed his own chair back as he stood. He was aware of Tamlin’s green eyes following them as he strode for the door and he cast a quick look over his shoulder at his old friend. He could have sworn it was jealousy he read on Tamlin’s face, but then Elain had taken his hand and Lucien forgot all about Tamlin as they headed out into the hallway.

The walk to the glade passed quickly, but the sun was pleasant and warm in the sky, and Lucien had almost forgotten how mild the days were in the Spring Court. Nothing was ever harsh or unpleasant and he remembered why he had fallen a bit in love with this place. It was in such contrast to the brutal aspects of the Autumn Court, almost like a balm to everything he had been running from. He thought Elain must have sensed something of his thoughts down the bond because she wandered closer and took his hand gently in hers, not saying anything but there all the same.

The familiar peace washed over Lucien the moment he stepped into the glade with Elain and, judging from the soft sigh he heard from her, he figured that she felt it too. A moment later she had hurried forward, her hand tracing through the violet flowers that snaked their way up most of the trees around the place, and he knew that she was searching for blue flowers. He moved toward the place he had used to like to sit, and spread the blanket out in the shade, before setting the basket down beside it. As he dropped down to sit, he glanced across to where Elain was kneeling beside a tree, her hands moving over a small red-flowered bush. 

After several moments, she straightened and headed toward him, sinking down on the blanket and pulling her book from her pocket. Lucien smiled at her and indicated a small plant growing right next to where he had set the blanket. “As promised, Petal.”

He saw her interest sharpen as she leaned toward the plant, her gentle fingers reaching out to trace the light green lacy leaves that seemed to surround the blue flowers. “Oh…” she bit her lip for a moment, as her dark eyes moved over the flower, “These are quite delicate…”

Lucien nodded. “Every time I came here, I would find myself drawn to them. I would sit here mostly…”

Elain flicked a smile at him before she began to quickly sketch the flower. “Thank you for showing me…” she murmured and Lucien watched her with a smile of his own before opening the basket and setting out some of the sandwiches and cakes. He knew that it was still a time until lunch but he had interrupted her breakfast, and he hadn’t eaten at all himself. 

As Elain sketched, he slowly passed her bits and pieces to eat and then, when he figured that he’d gotten enough food into her, he began to read from the book he’d brought. She had moved on to a different flower by the time he had finished the next chapter and set the book aside.

“Would you show me?” He asked, indicating the book and then the blue flower. 

Elain looked up at him from beneath her lashes. “Of course…” she passed him the book and he flicked back a page to her illustration. 

“You’re getting quite good…”

“Do you think so?”

“I do.” Lucien smiled at her, flicking further back through the book, looking at other flowers she had drawn. 

“That kind of makes me want to go back to the beginning and do the original ones better…”

“Well, they are back at the manor…”

“True.”

“I kind of like it, though.” Lucien told her, flicking to the first few pages. “It’s like tracing the journey we took… Your skills have changed as you have…” he looked at her, “As we have…”

Elain grinned at him, “Are you trying to say that my skills have grown like our relationship?”

Lucien gave a derisive huff, and then tilted his head. “…maybe?”

“Well,” Elain took the book from his hands and scooted closer to him on the blanket as she set it aside. “that is somewhat sweet.”

“You think so?” Lucien could feel his blood beginning to quicken in his veins, and when Elain smiled more widely at him, he knew that she had noticed his heartrate increase. “Imagine where your skills will be by the time we’ve been to all the courts.”

“Imagine where we’ll be…”

He couldn’t help lifting a hand to her hair, trailing his fingers along her long braid all the way to the end. “That is a fascinating thought…” his voice held the edge of a low growl, “I truly can hardly wait for tonight…” He watched a light blush creep into Elain’s cheeks, but she held his gaze.

“I know.”


	66. Chapter Sixty-Six

**Chapter 66**

When Lucien leaned toward her, Elain thought that he was about to kiss her and she tilted her face up toward him, only to catch her breath as he smiled and leaned past her. She turned slightly to see him delicately pluck one of the blue flowers from its stem, and then he drew it back toward himself, softly tapping it to the tip of her nose as he did so. 

“…what?” she watched him for a moment before dropping her gaze. Lucien’s warm fingers were suddenly beneath Elain’s chin, lifting her chin so that she would look at him again.

“I’m sorry.” He murmured, and a small smile tugged at his lips. “I was playing…” he leaned toward her again, and this time his lips brushed her cheek and Elain gave a small smile of her own.

“I think you owe me more than that…”

“Do you, Petal?” He kissed her cheek again, his fingers still beneath her chin, and Elain turned her head to bring her own lips to his, feeling him smile into the kiss when she did so. “You’re getting better at telling me what you want.” He murmured against her lips and Elain felt herself flush scarlet. 

She sat back a little, lifting a hand to her mouth as she looked at him. “Oh.” Lucien tilted his head as he looked back at her, and she could feel disappointment trickle down the bond toward her. 

“I didn’t mean that was bad…” he said, his hand falling to her shoulder and sliding down her arm. “I … like it.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely.” His metallic eye clicked as he focused on her, “I want to know what you want… I’m no daemati.”

Elain blinked as she looked carefully at him, heat flushing further throughout her. “What if… what if it’s not… proper…” To his credit, Lucien didn’t laugh. Elain did feel a flicker of amusement from him, however, as he smiled at her. 

“Oh, Petal.” His smile widened wickedly, “I’d want to know even more desperately then…” his hand moved back up her arm and Elain shuddered pleasantly, “You are my mate…” his expression turned more serious, “and you can share anything and everything with me without fear of judgement.” Looking into Lucien’s eyes once more, Elain felt the truth of that. His hand came gently to her cheek and he raised an eyebrow at her. “You understand?”

“I understand.”

He gave her a satisfied smile then, his fingers moving over her cheek as his eyes moved over the rest of her approvingly. “Then tell me what you want.”

Elain swallowed thickly. “I want you to kiss me.” She murmured, “I … want you to hold me tightly while you do so and I want to feel your fingers in my hair…”

As he had said, there was no judgement in Lucien’s eyes, and nothing but pleasant anticipation reached Elain down the bond. She held his gaze as he shifted closer on the blanket, one of his hands going to her waist and sliding around behind her as he leaned in to press his lips to hers. Bringing one of her own hands up, Elain took hold of the collar of Lucien’s jacket, drawing him in even closer, as she parted her lips for him, allowing him to deepen the kiss when his own hands tightened on her lower back. A startled gasp escaped Elain when Lucien lifted her a little, pulling her to himself as he licked at her and she wrapped both of her own arms around his neck, desire coursing through her. 

“Is this what you wanted, Petal?” he asked, lifting his head to meet her eyes and Elain smiled at him as his hand slid slowly up the back of her neck and into her hair. Tingles erupted across Elain’s scalp and down her spine and she nodded, sliding one of her own hands down to the side of Lucien’s throat, smiling gently at him. 

“Mhmm.” Closing the small distance between him, she pressed a delicate kiss to his lips, listening to the way that his heart was thundering in his chest. Smiling still, Elain could feel how close Lucien was to letting his control slip, and she decided to see just how long he could last before he sought more. Giving a soft groan of appreciation for his gentle licks, Elain slid her other hand across Lucien’s shoulder, her nails scratching at his coat. She opened her mouth a little more for him, encouraging him on, and was pleased when he took that opportunity to deepen the kiss. Still listening to his heart, Elain slid her hand around to the back of Lucien’s neck as she manoeuvred herself into his lap. She could feel his self-control and she smiled at him when he lifted his head to meet her eyes. Surprise was clear there and she slid her left hand down his chest, her fingers tracing some of the delicate embroidery in his coat. 

“I can feel you holding yourself in check…” Elain murmured, her eyes flicking back and forth across his face, trying to read him. “What a good courtier you are.”

“That’s not why I’m doing it.” His reply was low and Elain tilted her head. 

“Then why?”

One of his hands came to her cheek, his finger brushing her cheekbone. “I respect you, who you are, your choices… I don’t want to do anything that would put you into a position you’re uncomfortable with or would find unseemly.”

“Aren’t we past that?” Elain asked, remembering his expression when she’d gone down on her knees before him in the Eisblume garden.

“We’ll never be past that.” He told her, and she was pleased that what she had done hadn’t changed his view of her. That thought seemed to give her more confidence, and she thought about what he had told her moments ago.

“You want to know what I want?” she asked, and he nodded, “I want you to do what you want to do… If I’m not worrying about my desires being proper, then neither should you.” Interest reached Elain down the bond, and she met Lucien’s eyes with a bold a look as she could muster. Fire burned in his russet eye and she felt his hands tighten on her waist an instant before he went up on his knees, lifting her to himself, and Elain wrapped her legs around his waist as he kissed her. 

Heat flooded Elain, and she could feel her skin flush with it. She knew that a dark blush was currently painted across her chest and up her arms before reaching her skin, and she was glad that Lucien wasn’t looking at her while she was wrapped around him. When he leaned forward, Elain clung to him as he placed her gently against the blanket on her back as he hovered over her, his lips moving slowly against hers while one of his hands slid up into her hair again. 

“Like this?” he murmured, lifting his head just enough to meet her eyes. 

“Yes.” She replied, her own hands skimming over his waist. “This is where you first kissed me,” she reminded him, “Last time we were here… Right here by that tree…”

“I remember,” Lucien breathed, his eyes flicking toward the tree for the briefest moment before back to Elain’s. “You were teasing me.”

“I was not.” She smiled, “I just… That was when I realised that I wanted you to kiss me…” her smile widened when he pressed a gentle kiss to the tip of her nose. 

“You said that you thought I was meant to bring you here…”

“I believe you were…” she could feel her own heart still beating quickly as she looked up at him, “This place feels significant… There was a reason you always used to come here and that I dreamed of it…”

Lucien nodded, bringing the blue flower he had picked up to trace along Elain’s cheek. “I’m glad you’re including it in your book…”

“I’m glad we came back here.” She said gently, “I hope that we come back again…”

Lucien nodded. “As do I.”


	67. Chapter Sixty-Seven

**Chapter 67**

Lucien kissed Elain slowly. He had intended to press a single kiss to her lips and then let her back up, but found himself sinking down against her as he continued to kiss her. When her arms wound around him, he had allowed himself to deepen the kiss further, letting out a soft groan when she had pulled him down on her, one of her hands moving up into his hair, tugging gently. Fire filled his veins and his hand continued to move through her hair, pushing it back from her face again and again as his slow kiss turned more heated.  
When Elain’s hand slipped beneath his shirt, Lucien started at the surprise of the feel of her hand on his skin and he pressed himself down more firmly against her. The sound she made ignited something deep within him and he found his own hands quickly undoing the laces of her dress. He tugged it open when it was loose enough and then he was kissing his way down her throat to her chest, moving against her as he did so.

“Lucien…” Elain’s soft voice tugged at him and, when he felt her pulling at his jacket, Lucien lifted his head to meet her dark eyes, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips as he did so. She didn’t say anything further then, but her hands began pushing his jacket from his shoulders, and he took her meaning. Watching her carefully for a few moments, Lucien wanted to see the certainly in her eyes. It was there, mixed with a burning need, and he kissed her again, trying to ensure that he kept himself in check. 

Allowing Elain to rid him of his jacket and shirt, Lucien carefully dragged Elain’s dress up her thighs, his hands skimming her skin as he did so, and enjoying her shudder before her hands moved easily down his back. Pressing his lips to her throat, Lucien closed his eyes when Elain’s hands slid around to begin undoing his pants. He could hear her breath coming in quick and short gasps and he lifted his head to look at her. 

“You okay?” he asked her gently. 

“Yes.” Her response was quick, though he felt her hands falter and he reached down with a hand of his own to finish what she had begun. Soon enough he had kicked his pants away, giving a slight shudder at the small breeze that was crossing the glade. 

Looking back down at Elain, he decided that he needed to get her out of the dress she was wearing and his hand went to the neckline, loose and free, and he pulled it down to expose her to himself. Elain’s soft gasp made his eyes flick back to her face and he smiled at her, reaching for the blue flower he had plucked earlier. Slowly, he traced the flower from the base of her throat, down her chest, watching goosebumps rise on her skin as he did so. Knowing that Elain could hear his heartrate quickening, Lucien smiled, enjoying the fact that she would know how much he wanted her. 

Tracing the flower across one of Elain’s breasts, Lucien followed it with his lips, licking at her nipple and taking it into his mouth and grinning at her gasp when her hand tightened in his hair. “Ohh!” her cry went straight between his legs, and he knew that he was hard. 

Lucien brought the blue flower back up to trace across Elain’s cheekbone, his eyes returning to hers, and the fire in his blood heating at the look he found there. Carefully, he tucked the flower into her hair before he bent to kiss her properly, his tongue sweeping her mouth within moments when she opened to him.

_Mate. Touch her, smell her, taste her-_

He could, he realised. He could do everything he had been driven to do, and the thought set the rest of his body on fire. Lucien pressed his face into Elain’s throat, drawing a deep breath before he set his hands about ridding her of the dress, stripping it from her within moments before tossing it aside somewhere near his own shirt. Hearing Elain’s breathing change, he lifted himself to look her over, realising that this was the first time he had really gotten to see her entirely naked. Unable to help a grin when he looked back up to her eyes, Lucien pressed a soft kiss to her lips when he saw her apprehension. “My perfect mate…” he murmured and she gave him a small smile in return. Lucien went to kiss her again, but was unable to prevent himself looking her over again, absolutely certain that she was the most beautiful creature he had seen in his entire life. 

His hands seemed to take on a life of their own, moving down over her, past her breasts to her narrow waist where they settled as he moved his lips to her throat, kissing and licking at her and enjoying the breathy sound she made. The pleasured groan she made next had Lucien pressing himself to her, pleased when her hands tightened on his back as she wrapped her legs around his waist. “Lucien…” she murmured, ”Please…”

“Alright, Petal…” He kissed her cheek gently, then, his hands slipping down to her hips as he adjusted her position beneath him. Her hands were hesitant on his back, and he felt a shiver of nervous anticipation from her down the bond, along with something hot and desperate. When he was ready, Lucien positioned himself as he kissed her again, slow and deliberate. 

Elain hooked her leg behind his knee when her eyes met his, and he pushed carefully into her, watching her face as she gasped, her brown eyes wide. Lucien was still then, never taking his eyes from hers. He listened to her shallow gasping breath as she tried to get used to the feel of him inside her and she gave a soft whimper of his name. “Lucien…”

He stroked a gentle finger down her cheekbone, feeling her soft hands move up and down his back and, still holding her gaze, meeting her wide eyes, Lucien pushed again. Elain gasped as she had before, her hands tightening on him.

_Mate. Mate. Mate._

The word repeated over and over in Lucien’s head, in time with his heartbeat, and he pressed his lips to her cheek, kissing his way down to her throat and then across to her ear. “You feel so good…” he breathed, his eyes closing as he pushed into her again. “So good…”

“Ah…”

Lucien lifted his hands back up Elain’s body, one coming to rest at her shoulder and the other at her cheek so that he could hold her in a position where he could watch her expression when he thrust into her again. Her face was flushed and Lucien found he couldn’t look away from her as he began to move over her more smoothly. This was such a relief after so long, and he wanted to watch her face during every moment of it. He needed to see her enjoy him as much as he was about to enjoy her. 

_Mate. Mate. Mate._


	68. Chapter Sixty-Eight

**Chapter 68**

Clutching at Lucien’s broad back, Elain gasped. Her hands slid across his smooth skin, feeling the heat of him through her palms as well as where he was pinning her beneath himself. When he ghosted his lips across hers, she smiled, gasping again when he thrust into her in the same way he had moments before.

“Ah!” she bit her lip to hold in any further cry and Lucien held her gaze. His arms slid under her, holding her close as he continued to move, and she gave another soft sound. “Oh…”

“Is that good…?” Lucien’s eyes, both russet and gold held her gaze as he looked down at her. Elain nodded, gasping again as she could feel him moving inside of her. His hands were still holding her gently, caressing her, and Elain lifted one of her own hands to Luicen’s face. She met his constant gaze, looking up at him as she traced her fingers down his scarred cheek. Elain had never imagined she would ever have a faerie lover, yet here was this beautiful male who loved her, and was completely enamoured with her. He had suffered so much in his expansive lifetime, and still sought to be kind. Her fingers traced his scar to his jaw. She loved him. It was fact now, there was nothing she could do about that and, Elain realised, there was nothing that she wanted to do about it. She wanted to love him. 

Still, he hadn’t looked away from her face, his eyes seemingly locked on her, and Elain didn’t think she had expected that anything could feel this right. “Lucien…” she murmured, her fingers sliding into his hair as her breath hitched at his movement, “I love you…”

Lucien’s fingers caressed her skin and he nodded, panting slightly. “I can feel that…” he breathed, his lips moving across her cheek, “Can you feel how much I love you…?”

Elain groaned, her hand tightening on Lucien’s upper arm. She could. The bond was sending her everything he was feeling and thinking, and her eyes welled at the intensity of it all. “Ye-yes…” she nodded her own head, “I can…”

He kissed a tear from the corner of her eye, his lips hot against her skin before he shifted to her ear, his movement stilling. “Am I hurting you?”

“No… I’m okay…” Elain ran her fingers through his hair, giving him a reassuring smile when he lifted his head to look at her.

“Good…” His eyes moved over her again and Elain held more tightly to his arm, her foot still hooked behind Lucien’s knee as he began to move steadily over her, inside of her, once again. She listened to his breathing grow heavier as he pushed harder over and over, and Elain couldn’t help a low growl building in her own throat. “Mmm… that right…?” Lucien panted in her ear, and Elain clutched at him, one of her knees coming higher, hooking around him. This seemed to encourage him further as he lengthened his smooth thrusting, his breath ragged in her ear and his arms tight around her.

“AH!” Giving a cry, Elain flung an arm of her own out to the side, her hand missed the edge of the blanket and instead grabbed at a handful of grass. Her fingers dug into the soft earth as she clenched at the grass, and she felt the warm dirt cake beneath her nails, but she didn’t care, she was used to that. Lucien didn’t stop and Elain gave another cry when his hands slid down to take a hold of her hips as he moved his to meet her, his movements still gentle but decisive. She could feel his need matching her own, and knew that he wanted to push further. It was also clear to her that he was holding himself in check, still trying to be careful with her, wanting to be tender. “It… it’s okay…” she murmured, sliding a hand to his cheek. “Ah… it’s okay…”

Lucien met her eyes, smiling at her before pressing a kiss to her lips. His arms slid from beneath her, one hand lifting to her cheek and the other bracing himself over her as he deepened the kiss. “No need to rush…” he breathed, rolling his hips and earning another gasp from Elain. He grinned at her again, licking at her when he kissed her slowly once more. “We have… ah…” he pushed slowly into her and Elain’s eyes closed as her hand tightened in his hair, “We have so much time…” It was true, Elain thought, they had all of eternity. “Ohh… Cauldron help me…”

Elain simply wrapped herself tightly around Lucien as he worked in her. He was murmuring endlessly in her ear now, telling her how good she felt and how he didn’t know how he had ever survived without her, and how he never wanted this to end. Holding him tightly, Elain listened to him, closing her eyes again when she began whimpering and gasping at every thrust he made. She could feel herself building toward her end, and she could feel something similar trickling down the bond from Lucien. They both hit her at once and Elain was unable to contain a shriek, releasing Lucien’s hair so that she didn’t pull on it too hard, and instead clutching tightly at his broad shoulders. Her back arched as she shook and she was vaguely aware of the sounds Lucien was making before he went still, his weight pressing down on her as he panted heavily in her ear. 

Unable to move, she lay still, listening to the sounds of the glade, the wind moving through the trees, rustling the leaves pleasantly, and the soft birdsong from somewhere nearby. Gradually, Elain found herself able to move slightly and she began tracing gentle circles into Lucien’s back with her fingers. 

“Are you okay, Petal?”

Nodding, Elain turned her head to press her lips to Lucien’s cheek, right over his scar. “Perfect.” She replied softly. He gave a soft huff, releasing a breath he’d held, and then Elain felt him pull himself from her, and she bit her lip. It took her a moment to adjust to the loss of him, and she just watched as he pushed himself into a sitting position before he reached for her dress and his shirt. 

“Not that I want you to cover up…” he said, a smirk forming on his lips as he looked at her, “but I don’t want you to get cold…”

Elain took her dress as she sat up as well, slipping it easily over her head before beginning to fasten it around her. When she had it on, she looked again to Lucien who was pulling his pants on. “I… I hadn’t intended…” he began, casting a quick glance at her. “We had planned…”

She could feel his apprehension and reached a hand out to him. “Lucien…” she got to her knees and crawled toward him, lifting her hand to his cheek. “I wouldn’t change anything.” The uncertainty in his russet eye cleared, and his metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked at her. “All I wanted was you.”

He smiled at her, wrapping an arm around her waist to draw her to himself. “This is where I first kissed you.” He said, and his smile turned into a grin, “It does seem appropriate…”

Elain nodded. “Yes.” She breathed, holding his gaze when he brought one of his own hands to her face, his fingers tracing her skin before tucking loose locks of hair back from her face. 

“Did you like it?” he asked, and Elain could hear that although he tried to sound nonchalant, there was nervousness beneath the light tone. His heartbeat quickened as he waited for her response and she smiled at him before she answered.

“I did…” she told him. “Couldn’t you feel that?”

Tilting his head, Lucien nodded, and Elain could see him thinking. “I wasn’t sure that wasn’t just me…”

“Not just you.” She pressed her lips to his in a soft kiss. “Not just you.”


	69. Chapter Sixty-Nine

**Chapter 69**

The pinks and purples across the sky as the sun sank toward the horizon were enchanting, and Elain found herself unable to keep her eyes on the ground in front of her as she and Lucien walked back to toward Tamlin’s manor. The whole world appeared to be bathed in a peachy glow and as Elain’s eyes scanned the sky again, Lucien slipped his hand into hers. “You’ll trip…” he told her, and she could hear the smile in his voice.

“It’s so beautiful…”

“You’ll love the Dawn court.” He replied, “The colours are always like this.”

“Ah…” Smiling, Elain glanced at Lucien before looking back to the sky. She stumbled on the tangled path a moment later, and Lucien’s grip on her tightened as he kept her on her feet. She gave him a smile of thanks and made herself look down at the path they walked along.

Swinging her free hand, clutched tightly around a small bouquet of flowers from the glade, Elain smiled happily to herself. She was glad they had a week before they were due to head to the Summer Court. This was about as pleasant as she could ever have imagined anything to be. Glancing again at Lucien, she watched him walking beside her. He had the basket of their leftover food in his other hand, the rolled up blanket beneath his arm, and he wore a thoughtful expression on his face. The orange light the setting sun was casting across the world caught on Lucien’s vibrant hair, making it look like molten metal, and Elain could barely force herself to look away from him. She could hardly believe that someone so stunning and good could be her mate. She didn’t know anybody in her life that had ever been that lucky, let alone herself.

When her foot caught on a root, Elain stumbled and managed to right herself before making sure she began watching where she was going again. She could feel Lucien’s eyes on her, and smiled softly to herself as they continued to walk in silence. When they came into sight of the manor, Elain looked back up to the sky, now a darker shade of purple. She could still feel Lucien’s eyes on her and she glanced his way again. 

“How do you feel?” he asked, hand still firmly holding hers.

“I’m okay.” Elain looked him over when the sun caught his metallic eye, glinting brightly. “I feel just fine…”

Lucien lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to the underside of her wrist. “Good…”

“I would like a bath…” she added, and Lucien nodded. 

“Yes…” He agreed, as they headed up the steps. “Me too.”

They were on their way upstairs when Tamlin appeared nearby. “Lucien…” Elain paused, looking back around to see the blond High Lord sticking his head out of a door to the hall. “There’s a letter for you.”

“Go on…” Lucien’s hand pressed into Elain’s lower back as he pressed her in the direction she had been walking. “I’ll follow in a second…” Glancing at him, Elain then flicked a glance toward Tamlin who was now standing in the hallway, closer to them. “Go on…”

Elain let out a soft breath and nodded, continuing up the stairs and heading for Lucien’s bedroom.

*

Lucien didn’t take his eyes off of Tamlin, even as he pushed Elain to continue on upstairs without him. He wanted her to get upstairs and to take the bath she had told him that she wanted. Lucien could still smell himself on her, and he knew that Tamlin would be able to as well. His old friend would, no doubt, know exactly what they had done, but that didn’t mean that Lucien wanted Elain standing in front of Tamlin while the High Lord came to that conclusion and was thinking about it. As much as he liked his scent on her skin, liked her smelling of him, he figured it was probably better if she had a bath before she came down for dinner.

“A letter?” He asked Tamlin, taking a step down to the hallway and heading for the other male. 

“Yes.” Tamlin handed Lucien a small letter and Lucien opened it quickly, recognising Eris’ tiny cramped handwriting. Anxiety filled him as he scanned the contents before folding the parchment and slipping it into his coat. When he looked back up, Tamlin’s green eyes were on him.

“Bad news?”

“I…” Lucien let out a huff. “My presence has been requested.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know…”

“Will you go?”

Lucien thought for a moment. “I wasn’t requested as Emissary for the Night Court…” he pretended he didn’t see the sneer that crossed Tamlin’s face at those words, “So… I wouldn’t have that protection… I… I couldn’t take Elain with me…”

“She is welcome to stay here.”

Biting his lip, Lucien turned away for a moment, pacing a little. “I want to check on my mother…” He glanced back to Tamlin who had not moved, and had not spoken. “It would be good to see what has happened there now that Eris is High Lord…” Tamlin nodded once, and Lucien kept thinking. “I could go in the morning and be back the next day…”

“You could.”

“Elain can really stay?”

“Of course.” Those green eyes swept over Lucien then, and he remembered his earlier thoughts. He knew when Tamlin scented the air, knew when one blonde eyebrow lifted, that his old friend had come to the correct conclusion.

“Alright…” Lucien ran a hand through his hair, “If I can leave Elain here, I’ll go to the Autumn Court tomorrow morning…”

*

Elain had just folded her letter to Feyre when Lucien walked into his bedroom. “What are you doing?” he asked lightly, slipping his jacket from his shoulders. 

“Writing to Feyre.” She replied, “I was telling her that if she hasn’t already been to the Winter Court, she should go to see the Eisblume. I bet she would love to paint them.”

“I’m sure she would.” Lucien smiled at her and she watched his eyes, russet and gold, move over her. “You’ve already had a bath?”

“I did…”

He nodded and headed for the bathroom. “I’m going to do the same.”

“Alright…” Elain sealed the letter, and then got to her feet. She pulled one of the blue flowers from her bouquet she had set up in a vase and decided that, while Lucien was bathing, she would go and find Tamlin and ask him the name of this flower. He had told her that he would know and be able to inform her, and she needed the name for her book.

She found Tamlin in the dining room, just as he was sitting down in his usual seat and she strode toward him. “Good evening.” She greeted, smiling. 

“How was your day?” he asked her, leaning back in his seat and surveying her with interest.

“Quite pleasant…” she responded, before holding the flower out to him. “This is the blue flower… do you know what it is called?”

Tamlin took the stem from her fingers and held it up to look carefully at it. “This is called Love-in-a-mist.”

Elain smiled widely. “Really?”

“Yes.” Tamlin nodded and handed the flower back to her. “It is quite delicate and lovely.”

“I thought so too.” She said, smiling at the flower. Then, remembering the way that Lucien had traced one of them over her body, following the path it had taken with his mouth, she blushed. “A lovely flower with a lovely name.”

When she looked back up, it was to find Tamlin looking intently at her. “How do you feel about remaining here when Lucien goes to the Autumn Court?” he asked her, and she tilted her head. 

“When he _what_?”

Tamlin’s eyebrows lifted, “Did he not tell you?”

“No…” Elain’s stomach twisted, “What are you talking about?”

“He received a letter from Eris requesting his presence.”

“Why?”

“I don’t believe the letter said. But,” Tamlin paused for a second, “He wants to check on his mother, and to see the way of things now that Eris has taken over from Beron.”

Nodding, Elain bit her lip. She could understand well enough that Lucien would be eager to see how his mother was faring with things having changed. “And he wants to leave me here…”

“I don’t know that he would put it that way… but he knows that you would be safe here.”

Thinking of the brother that had attacked them as she and Lucien had tried to get out of the Autumn Court, Elain winced. She knew that Lucien wouldn’t want to take her back there while there was the possibility of something similar happening and, until it was clear what kind of Court Eris was running, he knew that Lucien would take any chance he could to keep her away. That didn’t mean that he would be safe, however. Stepping back from the table and from Tamlin, Elain straightened her back. 

“Excuse me.” She said, turning toward the door, “Lucien and I need to have a conversation…”


	70. Chapter Seventy

**Chapter 70**

Lucien was still in the bathroom when Elain strode back into his room, looking for him. “Lucien?” she called, striding for the bathroom door.

“Yeah?” His voice was muffled by the door and Elain looked at the handle. When she didn’t respond, he called out to her again. “Is everything okay?”

Thinking quickly, Elain let out a huff. “Can I come in?”

“Uh… Yes…” she heard the surprise in his voice, but opened the door and stepped into the bathroom. Lucien’s eyes were on her, a questioning look evident in them. “What’s wrong?”

Standing by the door, Elain looked at him. He had sat up further in the bathtub when she had come in, one of his hands draped over the edge, water dripping to the floor. She couldn’t see anything below his chest, but her eyes moved over him anyway. Again, what Tamlin had told her went through her mind and she bit her lip. “Are you going back to the Autumn Court and leaving me here?”

Lucien’s face twitched, pulling at his scar for a moment, before he sank back against the tub. Both of his hands went up to his face, rubbing water over himself and Elain just watched him, waiting for his answer. He nodded then, his eyes going back to her and Elain frowned. “I was going to tell you once I was clean and dressed.” He said softly. “I didn’t think Tam would get there first.”

“I went down to ask him what that blue flower is called.”

“Ah.” He nodded, and Elain heard his hands drop back into the water. “… What is it called?”

“Love-in-a-mist.”

“Seems appropriate.” Lucien murmured, and Elain took a few steps toward him. He looked up at her when she stopped, and she could see his eyes moving across her face, trying to read her. “I… have to go.”

“You don’t have to leave me here. I want to go with you.”

“Elain…” he paused, and she knew that he was trying to work out what to say. “I don’t know that it’s safe.”

“Then you shouldn’t go.”

“I have to.” His voice was gentle, but she felt a sliver of fear down the bond. “I need to know that my mother is okay.”

“You don’t think that Eris would have…” Elain frowned. It had seemed to her that Lucien’s eldest brother cared for their mother. 

“No…” he shook his head, “But everything will have changed. We also need to find out what kind of Court it has become.”

“You don’t need to do that alone!” Elain took another step toward him, “If it needs to be seen then others can go with you. Rhys would have no trouble walking in there to see for himself…”

“No…” Lucien shook his head, “Eris asked for me… and I have a better chance of seeing the truth of the place than if Rhys or anyone else walked in. Rhys would only see whatever Eris wanted him to see.”

Elain moved to sit on the edge of the tub, looking silently at Lucien. If it wasn’t safe, she didn’t want him to go, but she could understand why he thought that he needed to. If he was going, then she wanted to go with him. She did not want him to go on his own. “…what if they try to kill you again?”

“That is exactly why I want you to stay here.”

Shaking her head, Elain bit her lip. “I can’t stay here while you go back there alone.” One of Lucien’s wet hands came up to take one of Elain’s hands, and she just watched as he ran a hot thumb over her knuckles.

“Please…”

“Lucien…”

“Knowing you are safe here will make it easier for me…” his thumb continued to move across Elain’s knuckles, and his eyes were firm on hers, “I don’t want to go back. I don’t know what I am walking in to… but it will be easier if I know you’re safe. You will be safe here. Tamlin will protect you.”

“Will he?” she raised an eyebrow, but Lucien nodded without hesitation. 

“Yes.”

Dipping her hand into the hot water, Elain watched the water swirl as she thought about what he wanted. If he was going back, and she knew that he was, then she would do whatever she could to make it easier for him. “Alright…” she murmured, “I’ll stay…”

“Thank you…” his hand brushed hers again and Elain nodded. After a second she got to her feet, noticing that Lucien’s hand followed her as if he were about to catch her and stop her. Glancing at him, she quickly undid her dress, letting it slip to the floor. “Oh…”

“Can I get in?” she asked, figuring that she probably should have asked before she’d taken her dress off. 

“Yes.” Lucien’s reply was instant, and his eyes followed her as she stepped into the tub between his feet. “… you already bathed…”

“I did.” She sank down to her knees in the water, her eyes still on him. He shifted to make room for her and she leaned forward, her hands on his thighs, as she stretched to kiss him.

“Oh…” Surprised pleasure reached Elain down the bond and she smiled, kissing him again. When Lucien’s wet hands came to her shoulders, sliding down her arms, trailing heat, she couldn’t help but shudder. Sinking lower, she lay herself against him, enjoying his heat and smiling again when his hands settled against her back. “I don’t want to leave you here.” Elain could feel the vibration of his voice in his chest, and she nodded. “I don’t want to be so far from you… but it wont be for long. I’ll go tomorrow morning and be back the next day.”

“Okay.”

“You could spend the time in the garden. You might find something else to include…”

“I might.”

“I’ll winnow as much as I can, so that I will be as quick as possible…”

Elain tilted her head to look up at Lucien. She could tell that he was only talking now because he was trying to distract himself. She could feel the fear coming off of him, could feel his anxiety. “It’s okay…” she murmured, reaching up to his cheek. “I know you don’t want to go…”

“I wonder what happened to Malak…”

Shuddering, Elain pushed herself up again. “Don’t think about him.” She pressed her lips to his cheek, over his scar. “If you’re not leaving until tomorrow, then don’t waste your time now thinking about him. You’re here. Be here.” His arms wrapped around her waist and he met her eyes.

“I do like the sound of that.” He murmured, and Elain smiled. 

“I should hope so.” She narrowed her eyes at him when one of his hands slid down her back to squeeze at her arse, and he gave her a wide grin. “Oh, I see…”

His heartbeat quickened and Elain traced her own fingers across his shoulder and up the side of his throat as she held his gaze. “How are you feeling about earlier?” he asked, and all humour was gone from his voice. Elain smiled gently, her hand sliding around to the back of his neck. 

“One of my favourite memories…” she murmured, her eyes flickering back and forth across his face. 

Lucien smiled back at her. “I’m glad…” his hands continued to move over her, and Elain felt her own heartbeat quicken in response. “You’re not sore, are you?”

“No…” She pressed a kiss to his warm chest, gasping then when one of his hands slid up the inside of one of her thighs.

“Then… how does this feel…?”

Elain’s eyes slid closed and she released a shaky breath, pressing her forehead into Lucien’s shoulder when his fingers slid between her legs.

“Yeah?” he asked, and Elain could do nothing but nod, one of her hands coming up to grab the side of the tub. She heard Lucien give a low chuckle and she forced herself to look up into his face. 

“Let’s get out.” She breathed, watching as he realised what she was suggesting. An instant later he nodded and Elain pushed herself back to her knees, reaching for a nearby towel. She doubted they would be making it downstairs for dinner.


	71. Chapter Seventy-One

**Chapter 71**

Elain ran the towel quickly over her skin when she stepped out of the tub. She had just turned toward Lucien who had followed her out, when he over and took the towel from her hands. Her eyes followed him as he dropped it to the floor and then he was moving toward her, a smirk evident on his face. Unable to help herself, Elain’s gaze moved over him, not having had this proper view of him before, and she smiled in return.

“Like what you see, Petal?” he asked, and Elain nodded an instant before he had lifted her from the floor. She wrapped her legs around his waist, wet skin sliding against wet skin. Lucien’s hands moved up her back and then he was kissing her. Elain grinned into the kiss, sliding her arms around his neck as she listened to his heartbeat. She was only vaguely aware of Lucien carrying her into the bedroom and gave a surprised gasp when he dropped her onto the edge of his bed. 

“What are…?” Sitting up on her elbows, she fell silent when Lucien went to his knees by the bed. His eyes met hers as his hands slid up her legs, spreading her wide before him. Elain’s heart thudded in her ears, increasing in pace when he gave her a smirk, winking with his good eye before he dipped his head to her and Elain fell back against the covers with a groan.   
Bringing her hand up, Elain clamped it over her own mouth, stifling a cry when she felt his tongue on her. An instant later, Lucien had reached up to take hold of both of Elain’s wrists, pulling them down and pinning them by her hips. He held both of her wrists there so that she could do nothing, touch nothing, as he continued to lick at her and, when she felt him push that hot tongue into her, she let out a loud shriek, her back arching as she tried to move to respond.

Lucien released her then, lifting his head as he crawled onto the bed over her. Elain’s hands went immediately to him, trailing gently up his back. Before she could do anything further, however, he had taken hold of her and moved her further up the bed until her head hit the pillows and his fingers traced her jaw. “Are you certain that you’re okay enough for this again already?”

She could hear his heart in her head, feel her own pumping wildly in her chest, and she was hot all over. Need and desire coursed through her and she nodded, sliding her arms around his neck and pulling him down to kiss him. “Yes.” She murmured. “Yes…”

Lucien evidently needed no further encouragement. One of his hands slid down between her thighs and Elain gasped when his fingers went to exactly the right spot. His other hand slid down the inside of her leg to her knee and he pulled it up and out wide as he kissed her again. When he pulled his fingers from her, Elain felt him adjusting himself over her and she barely had a moment to brace herself before had pushed himself deep inside of her. “AHH!”

“Alright?” Russet and gold eyes met hers and Elain wrapped herself more tightly around Lucien before she nodded. 

“Yes.” She gasped, “Uh… Mhm…”

He was still for only a moment before he began to move, his lips brushing her cheek before moving to her ear, and Elain could hear every breath he took and released. She could still feel the hand he held behind her knee as he lifted it higher, opening her wider for himself, as he thrust again and again. Elain’s breath came quicker and quicker as she clung to him. This was different to how it had been in the glade; Lucien seemed more desperate, more focused on this single movement, and Elain squeezed her eyes shut. She focused her own attention on the feel of him between her thighs, sliding in and out of her and she felt her breath catch slightly as delicious shudders passed through her. “Ah…Ah…” Small whimpers escaped Elain as Lucien’s hand shifted from behind her knee up into her hair and he held tightly as she then hooked both her feet around behind his own legs as he continued to move deep inside of her. “Ah… Mnn…”

Quicker and quicker Lucien moved, his heartbeat keeping time in Elain’s head, and his breath being panted against her ear and throat. Holding tightly to him, her hands slid over his slick back as she sifted through everything reaching her down the bond. She could feel his desperation, his need. She could feel lust and desire, but then also she could feel his anxiety at having to go back to the Autumn court. She could feel his fear. 

It was his fear that was driving him, Elain realised. It was rising higher and higher within him and, lifting her hand higher up his back, Elain slid her hand up the back of his neck and then around his jaw to his cheek. His breaths were still being panted into her ear and, turning her head, Elain pressed a kiss to his cheek. “It’ll be okay.” She whispered, feeling his hand tighten in her hair slightly.

Groaning, Elain just held tightly to him. She took all of the anxiety and fear coming off of him, and returned gentleness and love, stroking his back carefully and murmuring soft words of encouragement and comfort. He wasn’t as gentle as he had been that afternoon, but he was thorough, and before long Elain was moaning his name as he shifted both of his hands to brace himself over her, his thrusts rhythmic and smooth. 

After she had shrieked her release, hearing Lucien’s own cry before he collapsed down over her, Elain continued to stroke his back, slow and steady. Eventually, his breath in her ear had slowed and become more even and then he had shifted to the side, moving his weight off of her, and she turned to face him, keeping her arms around him as best she could. When she caught his gaze, he looked a little distracted, and she pressed a kiss to his cheek, drawing his attention.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his voice slightly hoarse.

“Yes…” Elain smiled, “I’m fine…”

He kissed her gently between her eyes, one of his large hands moving down her back. “I’m sorry,” he breathed, “if I hurt you…”

“You didn’t.” she replied, meeting his eyes, and lifting a hand to his cheek, “Not at all…”

“Good.”

Cuddling into him, Elain hooked one of her feet around his leg again, smiling when he slid his own arm around her waist, holding her firmly. Her eyes moved around the room, taking in the oranges, red, and golds with which he had decorated his space. She had noticed this the first time she had come in here, noticed that he had tried his best to make his room resemble the Autumn Court, and she thought about that now. 

Lucien had lived here for quite some time. This had been his space, enough so for him to feel territorial about it. This had been his home, and where he had felt comfortable, and he had tried to make it look like Autumn. He didn’t hate the Autumn Court in his heart, she realised. It was still important to him.

“Maybe…” she murmured, running her hand over him gently, “maybe when you go back, everything will be okay. Maybe Eris will have fixed things, and you will be able to visit more often. You might be able to see your mother, and come and go as you like… Maybe you will be able to spend more time there.”

She felt hope slide down the bond toward her then. 

“Maybe…” he agreed.


	72. Chapter Seventy-Two

**Chapter 72**

Catching Lucien’s sleeve as he moved for the door, Elain drew a sharp breath. She glanced at the door, the gentle warm spring sun coming through and bathing the entrance hallway in its soft glow. At any other time, it would have been inviting, but dislike coursed through her, and she didn’t want Lucien to walk out that door and into that light. His hand came to her waist and she looked away from the door, up into his gentle gaze.

“Elain…”

“I know.” She murmured, before biting her lip.

“I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“I know.”

Lucien’s hand came up to her cheek, and he smiled at her. “If you keep yourself busy, it will seem like no time at all.”

“I doubt that.”

Lucien’s eyes shifted past Elain, over her head, and she knew that he was looking at Tamlin. “You’re safe here, Petal. That’s what counts.”

“Make sure you’re safe.” She murmured, her fingers tracing the embroidery on his sleeve. Lucien looked down at her again, russet and gold eyes firm on her. 

“I’ll do my best.”

She was trying not to cry. Swallowing thickly, she blinked rapidly as she looked back to the door, hoping that he would think that the bright light was what was making her eyes shine. When he stepped closer, his hand sliding around to the back of her neck, Elain knew that he hadn’t bought it. She sniffed, and looked back up at him. “I’m just worried.” She murmured, “I keep thinking about when we were trying to leave… What if one of them surprises you again before you even get to the house…?”

“That was Beron’s Court.” Lucien replied, “I don’t believe Eris is the same…”

Elain nodded her head, wanting to believe that. “Okay.” She murmured, her fingers sliding further up his sleeve when he moved closer. His other hand slid around her waist as he backed her against the wall in the hallway, and she looked up at him a moment before he kissed her. Elain tightened her hands around his upper arms as Lucien’s fingers stroked her jaw, moving down her throat. When he broke the kiss, he pressed his forehead to hers, and Elain opened her eyes. “Promise…” she murmured. 

“I promise.” He said gently, “I’ll be back tomorrow.”

Elain stroked her fingers down his cheek, tracing his scar by feel rather than sight, and then he had straightened, stepping back from her. Letting her hand drop to her side, Elain just watched him, still leaning back against the wall as she did so. She could still feel the fear coming off of him, and now it was mixing with her own. He was watching her carefully and, knowing what he needed, Elain gave him a smile, watching as his eyes flickered back and forth across her face, and then further over her, taking her in. He smiled in return, giving her a wink, as he took another step back, and Elain pressed herself back into the wall more firmly in order to keep herself from shaking. The instant Lucien stepped through the door, he turned, striding into the light and then he was gone. 

“Bye…” she breathed, trying to force herself to breathe slowly and evenly. She did not like this. She did not like it at all. 

When Tamlin stepped into her line of sight, Elain turned her head toward him. She had forgotten that the High Lord had been there. He hadn’t spoken or said or done anything, although she reminded herself that he had just seen everything that had happened. His green eyes turned her way and Elain saw him raise an eyebrow at her. “…do you have plans for the day?” he asked, “To keep yourself busy?”

“I…” she cleared her throat a little. “I thought I’d go back into he gardens and look for anything else I might add to my book… I’m rather better now at sketching them…”

Nodding, Tamlin fastened his hands behind his back. “Would you like company?” he asked, “I could tell you about any of the flowers you’d like to know about…”

“No…” Elain shook her head a little, “Thank you, but I would rather spend some time with my own company…”

“Fair enough.”

Pushing herself from the wall, Elain wanted to get outside, get away, as quickly as she could. She was still struggling to get herself under control. She wanted to cry, but wouldn’t do it in front of Tamlin. Even as she felt Lucien winnow and disappear from anywhere near her, his fear did not lessen and nor did her own.

Tamlin just watched her as she moved for the door herself then, but then she was outside in the sun and she turned for the gardens. Being in a garden always made her feel better and, considering she felt pretty terrible just then, she was hoping that the most splendid garden she had ever encountered would be able to help improve her mood. Breathing deeply, Elain hurried into the garden, walking as swiftly and quickly as she could until she was surrounded by the lush garden beds and the sweet scent of all of the flowers floating on the warm air. That gentle spring sun was shining down upon the world and, as she pressed a hand over her mouth and closed her eyes to hold in any tears that might fall, Elain sank to the soft grass. 

She could feel how far away Lucien was now. She could feel his distance. She could feel his fear and anxiety. Nothing about this sat well with her, and she couldn’t work out why. It didn’t make sense that Eris would ask him to return. What was the point? His eldest brother may have helped save their lives when they had tried to escape the Autumn Court last time, but that didn’t mean that he would be keen on family reunions, or that he was interested in having Lucien over for family dinners. They had no idea where Malak was, or if was still in the Autumn Court. If he had been exiled after his attempted coup, where would he have run to? It was possible that he was even still hanging around the court, on the outskirts. What if Lucien ran into him? Thoughts like that would make her sick, Elain decided. She couldn’t afford to think like that. 

She wanted Nesta. 

Elain sank back until she was laying in the grass, staring at the sky. She hadn’t spoken to her sister in days, and she missed her. She missed both of them, but she wasn’t used to not having Nesta right there, always, when she needed her. So much had happened since she had left the Night Court for Winter. She wanted to tell her sister, talk about it with her. She wanted Nesta to tell her now that everything would be okay, because, if Nesta said something, then it would be so. 

If she sent word, she knew that her sister would come. It would be too late, Elain thought. By the time the message reached the Night Court, and Nesta had time to get to her, the day would be over and she would only need to go to bed. Lucien had promised that he would be back tomorrow, and she could handle it if it was only a day. She would try and keep herself busy like he had suggested. 

With her new resolve fresh in her mind, Elain go to her feet and moved toward a nearby garden bed where an interesting yellow flower was growing low to the earth. She hadn’t seen it the last time they had visited, and she thought that it would be challenging enough to try and draw to occupy her mind. 

By the time the sun began to sink in the sky, Elain was hungry and just a little bit dirty after rummaging around in the garden all day. She headed inside and found that dinner had already been laid out. Tamlin had insisted that she sit down, dirty or not, and eat something, especially as she and Lucien had not come down for dinner the night before. Elain had been sure she had blushed at his reasoning, but he had given no further indication that he knew why that may have been. 

Dinner had passed quickly and Elain had eaten far more than she would have expected. She had just gotten to her feet to go upstairs and wash herself off when a sudden wave of shock reached her down the bond and she froze, her eyes wide. As quickly as it had come it was gone and, try as she might, Elain could get nothing further from the bond. There was no further emotion, and no image or context to with what she had felt. Shock wasn’t so bad, she figured. She expected that much about the court and how it had changed might be shocking. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Shuffling upstairs and into the bath that had been waiting for her, hot and inviting, Elain was unable to shift her mind to anything else. She kept trying, again and again, to see something further, to ask Lucien to send her something, anything, so that she would know how he was. There was nothing.

She went to bed, worried and disappointed. The only comfort that she had was that by the time she woke up it would be the next day and she would be able to wait for him to return. He had promised, after all. 

Sleep was not far away, after her long day out in the garden, and Elain welcomed it as it washed over her. She had not expected to wake just after midnight with a jarring vision swimming in her mind. She knew, without question, that she was looking through Lucien’s eyes. It was his hands in front of her that she saw, large and familiar. The heavy iron bars that he clutched, however, were less than familiar, but far more chilling.


	73. Chapter Seventy-Three

**Chapter 73**

Paralysed with fear, Elain lay in Lucien’s bed. She hadn’t been able to move since she had awoken with that vision in her head. She had lay, desperately trying to see something further, trying to call for him to send her anything else. It hadn’t worked, however. All she had was that vision. They had locked him up. Biting her lower lip, Elain blinked back tears. She didn’t know if he was hurt, or what had happened. Why had they locked him up? Had they injured him beforehand? What were they planning on doing to him? 

Darkness pressed in on her. She didn’t know what to do. If they had locked Lucien up, it was unlikely that they were just going to release him. He wasn’t going to be able to come back to her. Unable to help a sob, Elain pressed a hand to her mouth, trying to stifle any further sounds. She couldn’t lose him; not when she hadn’t even accepted the mating bond yet. Knowing that she had to do something to help him, Elain thought. 

Laying in the darkness as the sky began to lighten and turn grey outside, she tried to figure out her options. She would send word to Rhys. If anyone would be able to help her, it would be Rhys. Feyre wouldn’t want anything to happen to Lucien, and would also likely have some idea of how to help. That was her first step, she decided. As the sun continued to rise, and birdsong began to sound outside her window, Elain threw the covers back and got to her feet. She hurried to the small desk by the window and penned a quick letter to Rhys and Feyre before she hurried to get dressed,

There was no way that she was able to just sit around and wait. Her letter had informed the Night Court about what was going on, but that didn’t mean that Elain was going to stay where she was. She had to go and see if she could get to him. She was going to the Autumn Court. 

When she was dressed, Elain threw a few things into her pack before slinging it across her shoulder. She knew that she had to tell Tamlin, so she hurried through the manor, toward his bedroom. When she found it, she knocked quickly on his door, fiddling with the strap of her bag over her shoulder. It was light enough now that she could see the confused look upon Tamlin’s face when he pulled the door open. 

“Elain?” he asked, and she was surprised to see that he was already dressed in his usual clothing. “What is the matter?”

“Lucien needs help.” She said simply, “I’m going to the Autumn Court.”

“He… wanted you to stay here…”

“They’ve imprisoned him.” Elain replied, already taking a step away. “I can’t stay here. I am going… I…” She looked him over, “I don’t know if I exactly remember where…”

“I’ll go with you.”

Looking him over, Elain nodded. That would be helpful for her. She wasn’t entirely sure where the portal was, and she would need assistance to move quickly. Lucien had told her that Tamlin would protect her, and she supposed that was true. If they came across anything or anyone on the road, like Malack, she figured she would be thankful for Tamlin and his company. Eyeing his hands, she couldn’t help but remember the claws that had come out when he had ripped into Lucien. Yes, Tamlin would be good protection for her. “Thank you.” She murmured gently, “Thank you…”

*

As cold seeped into his bones, Lucien seized the iron bars yet again. Knowing that it was fruitless, he tugged at them, trying to get himself some leverage in any way that he could. An instant later, he felt panic down the bond, and knew that it had come from Elain. With a start, Lucien realised that he had sent her an image of where he was, and he slammed any further connection down. She did not need to see this. He wouldn’t allow her to. 

If Eris was going to kill him outright, Lucien figured that he would have already been dead. They had descended on him in the throne room, pinning him like they had done before, but then they had dragged him down to the dungeon. If Eris was planning to execute him, why not already do it? Lucien knew they could have had him put to death right where Jesminda had been. Instead, he had spent most of the night in this freezing cell, and he had not meant to send Elain any of it.

He could feel her panic. She had seen exactly what had happened, and she had understood what it meant. Wondering what she would do once she had battled the panic down, Lucien bit his lip and released the bar. She wouldn’t just ignore what she had seen, he knew that. She would turn to someone for help. Who would it be, though? Her sisters? Feyre? Or Nesta?

Glad that she was in the Spring Court and nobody would be able to get to her while she was with Tamlin, Lucien forced himself to relax a little. He sat back from the bars, releasing them and dropping his hands into his lap. At least he had kept her safe. At least he had done that. 

Not knowing what time it was, down here in the dark, Lucien closed his eyes. If he could get any kind of rest, he should do so. He didn’t know what was going to be done to him, or when they were going to come for him, but if he was rested, he probably stood more of a chance of withstanding whatever it was. He needed to do that. He needed to have the best chance possible to be able to get back to Elain. He had promised, after all, and he was never going to break a promise to her. Not if he could help it.

*

The sun wasn’t very high by the time Tamlin and Elain reached the edge of the Spring Court. Elain was already thankful for her companion. He carried everything, and he was a reassuring presence at her back. She hadn’t expected him to talk quite so much, but he spoke softly to her, telling her about the things they passed and Elain had found it surprisingly comforting. His chatter died a little as they passed into the Autumn Court, and she felt him become more alert. His green eyes flickered around them, and she knew that he was keeping a strong ear out for any movement nearby. If someone had jumped Lucien unawares before he’d gotten to the Forest House, that threat was still out there and could do the same to them. 

They walked all day and the pretty autumn light had begun to fade before the House came into view. They had come across nobody out in the forest, but Elain knew they had been seen. Lucien had once told her that nobody approached the Forest House without Beron knowing about it, and she just knew that Eris would have some kind of similar system in place. There would be no sneaking up on him. 

Fine. She didn’t care about that. Let him know that she was coming. Let them all know. She was here for her mate, and she wasn’t leaving without him. 

As they walked, Elain tried to figure out what she could offer Eris. She had little by way of money or possessions, but she figured he would have no need of any of that. She had nothing else, she realised. Nothing but herself and her gift as a Seer. _That_ , she thought, might have some weight with a new High Lord. Perhaps he would value what she could tell him about his enemies or his reign. 

She would find out soon enough. 

When the doors opened before her, Elain turned her head to look at Tamlin. “Too late to turn back now,” he told her and she nodded. It was. Wondering then if Rhys and Feyre had received the letter she had sent that morning, Elain strode through the gates with her head held high.


	74. Chapter Seventy-Four

**Chapter 74**

The long hall was as cold and foreboding as Elain remembered. She walked through the doors, Tamlin at her shoulder, as they were shown into the room. Despite the mass of red hair around the place, her eyes still found Lucien instantly, and she moved toward him. Tamlin’s large hand came down on her shoulder, stopping her, however, and Elain forced herself to hold where she was. Lucien’s eyes were wide when he noticed her and his mouth opened as if he were about to say something, but evidently thought better of it.

“Lucien…” She couldn’t stop herself breathing his name and his eyes widened further as he stared at her. His confusion was evident across the room, and she could feel panic rising in him. He was no doubt wondering what she was doing. 

“Tamlin…” Eris’ voice echoed around the silent hall. “I don’t recall offering an invitation to The Spring Court…”

“No…” Tamlin replied, stepping past Elain. “It has been a while since you took the throne, however. We are all wondering how things have been going.”

“I’m certain you are.” Eris sank onto the large throne, and picked at his fingernails. Elain watched him, frowning. This seemed at odds with the Eris she remembered from her last visit to the Autumn Court. “You are, of course, welcome to stay the night…”

Tamlin cast a look at Elain. “We thank you for your hospitality…”

“We?” Eris sat up on his throne, looking at them with interest. “…you come with Lady Elain…” Eris’ eyes moved over Elain quickly, “Interesting… Have your… preferences… changed?” He asked her and Elain’s frown deepened. 

“No.” She said flatly, watching as Eris’ eyes flicked to Lucien. 

“Then why have you come with Tamlin?” he asked, returning his attention to her. 

Elain lifted her chin, looking him straight in the eyes. “I have come for my mate.”

*

Lucien’s heart just about forced itself from his chest. He had never heard Elain refer to him as her mate before. She had never used that word with him, and he thought he may just die hearing it now. He wanted to go to her, stride across to the room toward her, and wrap her in his arms. He wanted to hold her, kiss her. He wanted to hear her call him her mate again.  
Elain’s dark eyes flicked his way then, as if hearing what he was thinking. He tried to take a step toward her, but was prevented from doing so. 

“Come for him?” Eris asked, his tone far more casual than Lucien suspected he actually felt.

“Yes.” Elain replied, “I have come to collect him, and we will return home as soon as possible. Thank you.”

Eris was shaking his head. “Lucien and I have business we have not yet seen to.”

“He doesn’t live here. He is not your subject.” Elain said, and Lucien saw Eris flash a smile.

“No,” He agreed, “But the instant he crossed the border into my lands, I was granted the right to do as I wish…”

“What do you want?” Elain asked and Tamlin’s eyes met Lucien’s across the room. Lucien tried to send a message to his friend through his gaze. _Get her out of here!_

“In exchange for my brother?” Eris replied, grinning now. “What have you got to offer?”

Lucien’s eyes went quickly to Elain. He saw her falter, twisting her hands together in front of her. “What… what do you have need of?” she bit her lip, “I… I have abilities you might find useful.”

“Oh, I’m sure you do.” Eris smirked, “And you would offer these… services… in exchange for Lucien?”

“No!” Lucien couldn’t help himself. His voice rang out, echoing off the stone walls. “You can’t make a deal with him, Elain.”

“I…” Elain’s dark eyes were wide when she looked back at him. “I…”

“No…” he breathed, shaking his head. He would rather die than have her enter in to some bargain with Eris. His eldest brother was tricky and clever and would, no doubt, ensnare Elain into some agreement from which he would be the only one to benefit. “Don’t, Petal…”

Elain turned back to Eris and Lucien could feel her uncertainty. “I…”

“Oh, relax.” Eris sighed, letting out a laugh. “As entertaining as this is, there’s no need to get so angsty.” His brother got to his feet. “You can have Lucien.” He looked to Elain, “As soon as he publicly renounces any claim to my throne.”

Lucien stared at Eris. Was that what this was about?

*

Elain felt herself relax when Eris told her that she could have Lucien. So, he did not intend to kill him. That was good.

“What?” Lucien asked, “I already did that when I first left.”

Eris shook his head, and Elain looked between the High Lord and her mate. “No.” Eris said, “You renounced any claim you had to be Beron’s heir or successor… but not mine.”

Ashk walked into the room then and Elain’s eyes went to her. The redheaded Lady strode for the dais upon which stood her eldest son. 

“… you know I have no claim…”Lucien began, his voice low and Eris waved his hand. 

“I do.” He replied, “But everybody else thinks you do have a claim. You will publicly renounce any claim they may think you have… and then you will be free to leave.

Elain watched Lucien’s face. He looked a little relieved, and she couldn’t really blame him.

“Publicly?” Lucien asked after a moment. 

“Yes,” Eris nodded, “Tomorrow there will be a hearing for the local community. They will bring their issues forth, to hear my judgements and whatnot. During this meeting, you will tell them that I am the true leader and that you have given me your support and fealty.” Lucien was silent for several moments before Eris pushed him further. “Do you agree?”

“…Yes.”

Elain was unable to keep herself taking a step toward Lucien then. His eyes, russet and gold turned on her instantly, and she saw the familiar fire in them as he looked back at her.

“What are you going to do with him until then?” Tamlin’s voice filled the hall, and Elain glanced to Eris for his response.

“Since the Lady Elain has gone to such trouble to come for him, I think she can keep him.” Eris sank back into his throne. “Lucien will be confined to the House. But, within, he may move freely.”

That had been a better outcome than she had dared to hope for, and Elain smiled as she turned toward Lucien to see him nodding solemnly. At Eris’ words, the two faeries who had been holding Lucien in spot released him, and Elain hurried across to him, throwing her arms around his neck. She felt his hands, gentle at her waist, as he pulled her to himself, and then she remembered that everyone in the hall was currently watching them. Blushing as Lucien’s lips caressed her temple, she ran a hand up his chest, listening to his heart beating wildly within. She had felt his reaction when she had told Eris that she had come for him, and he knew that he had liked what he had seen. She would have to remember that in future.


	75. Chapter Seventy-Five

**Chapter 75**

Pacing back and forth in the room she had been provided with, Elain chewed her lower lip. It was the same room she and Lucien had shared when they had last been in the Autumn Court, and she had wanted the familiarity to be comforting, but it was not. It had been entirely too long, and she was beginning to think that Eris had changed his mind about Lucien being free to move around the house of his own volition. She hadn’t wanted to let him go earlier, but Ashk had requested, when everyone had been dismissed, to speak with her sons, and so, Elain had been shown to her room. Far more time had passed than she had expected, however, and she had just begun to consider going to look for Lucien when she decided better of that. She had not forgotten her encounter with one of Lucien’s other brothers as they had tried to flee the court. Being cornered in a hallway by any of them again was not something she wished to experience.

Striding into the bathroom, Elain moved to the sink wanting to was her face with cool water in an effort to calm herself down. It wasn’t as effective as she had hoped and so she stood there, leaning on the edge of the sink, and trying to control her breathing when she heard the door open. Standing bolt upright, Elain froze, hoping that it wasn’t one of Lucien’s brothers, and cursing herself for not locking the door. She listened for a moment, relief flooding her when she heard Lucien’s heartbeat nice and close. 

“Petal?”

Elain spun around and threw herself at Lucien as he stepped into the bathroom. “I thought he was going to lock you up again…” she murmured, pressing her lips to his cheek, his throat, his hair, and just about anywhere she could reach.

“No…” his hands moved quickly over her, clutching at her, and pulling her to himself, lifting her and holding her close. “Our mother wished to speak with us. She didn’t know where I spent last night…” Elain closed her eyes as images of Lucien’s hands clutching at those iron bars flashed through her mind. “She wanted an explanation from Eris.”

“She’s not the only one.” Elain kissed his cheek again, wrapping her legs around him as he held her tighter. She gave a small gasp when one of his hands slid up her thigh. 

“He’s not going to out my mother as having had an affair publicly. He wont announce that Beron was not my father, so he wants me to renounce any claim that others would expect me to have myself.”

“Why?” Elain asked, her eyes sliding closed again when Lucien turned and pressed her into the bathroom wall, pushing himself firmly against her. 

“Anyone who might prefer me over him as High Lord would have the chance to offer me support… Unless I publicly deny my claim.”

“So he locked you in the dungeon?” one of her hands slid into his hair when she felt his togue on her throat, licking at her skin carefully. “Mmm…”

“He does have a reputation to maintain…”

“Yes…” Elain didn’t know if her response was to what Lucien had just said, or the fact that she could feel his hands tugging her dress up and pulling it from between them. 

“I’m sorry…” he breathed, lips brushing her ear then, “I promised I would come back…”

“I’m still holding you to it.” She replied, shifting herself so that he could undo his pants. “Did he hurt you?” her hands pulled at the laces of his shirt, loosening it so that she could better see his chest.

“No.”

“That’s all I could think about… I couldn’t wait…” She thought about the panic that had filled her while waiting for dawn, trying to work out what to do.

“You shouldn’t have come.” He breathed, looking her in the eyes then, “But I’m glad you did.”

Elain dipped her head to kiss him softly, “I was never going to let him have you.” She murmured, “You’re mine…”

Lucien’s hold on her tightened instantly and he nodded. Elain felt him adjust her in his arms, pressing her into the wall again as he settled carefully against her. He hesitated for a moment, and she felt him try to leash himself, trying to be gentle. She threaded her fingers into his hair when his lips went back to her throat, kissing and licking at her skin and she bit her lip hard when he pushed slowly into her. Lucien’s groan into her ear was almost a growl and Elain tilted her head back to look at the ceiling. He was still, although his heart was anything but, and Elain had only just released her lip, about to tell him he could move, when they heard the door to their room open again and several voices came closer. 

Gasping, Elain went tense. Lucien had pulled himself from her and set her carefully on her feet in an instant. She just stood there as he quickly laced his pants as the voices came to a halt in the other room. “… Nesta?” she breathed, turning her head. Lucien glanced at her, meeting Elain’s eyes, before they both strode for the door. 

Nesta stood in the centre of the room, Feyre and Rhys beside her. Elain stared. “…you’re here?”

“We got your letter and we-” Feyre broke off, her blue-grey eyes moving over Elain before going to Lucien and doing the same thing. Tugging her dress more into place, Elain tried to look as innocent as possible. Glancing at Lucien, she noted that his hair was rather messed up from her hands, and his shirt hung loose and open from where she had pulled at it.

“Are you serious?” Nesta’s voice held ice.

Elain glanced at her older sister, but said nothing. 

“We came as quickly as we were able.” Rhys put in, his voice as even and smooth as always, “But it seems as if most of the drama was over by the time we arrived.”

“Yes,” Lucien said, adjusting his shirt as he moved to sit on the bed. Elain followed him. She sat herself beside him, unable to keep her hand off of him as he explained to the others what had happened, why Eris had locked him up, and what he had admitted he wanted when Elain arrived with Tamlin. Tracing her hand across Lucien’s shoulder, Elain watched Feyre for her reaction to the mention of Tamlin. Her sister didn’t so much as blink, however. 

“So,” Rhys began, “As soon as you renounce any claim to Eris’ throne, you’ll be free to leave?”

“Apparently.” Lucien said, giving a light shrug.

Elain smiled, looking at him, but then shifted her gaze to Nesta who was eyeing them intently. Blinking, Elain just met her sister’s eyes. She knew that her sister was trying to work out what she was seeing, and it was then that Elain remembered that the others had only seen her kiss Lucien once, when he had given her the blue cloak before they had headed to the Winter Court. Remembering that she had wished she could speak to Nesta when she had been waiting for Lucien to return to Spring, Elain smiled at Nesta. She still very much would like to discuss things with her sister, although, she might prefer a time where she and Lucien hadn’t just been interrupted in an intimate and compromising position. She wasn’t sure that the others realised just what they had interrupted, but she suspected they probably got the general idea.

“Do we need to have a conversation?” Nesta asked, blunt as ever. 

“About what?” Elain asked.

“About what was clearly just going on through that door.” Nesta indicated the bathroom, and Lucien gave a wry chuckle.

“Bit late for that…” he said. Elain’s jaw dropped and she turned her eyes on him. Nesta looked rather scandalised, while Feyre looked as if she were enjoying every second of what was going on around her. Rhys looked like he would have rathered he were anywhere else.

“Well, we will stay until you’re able to leave.” Rhys said, sliding an arm around Feyre. “We’ve been given rooms across the hall.”

Elain didn’t take her eyes off of Nesta. She would need to have a conversation with her. Not out of any uncertainty, or for permission for anything, but because her sister had always been a part of her life and deserved to be kept informed on what she was thinking and feeling. Because she was her sister.


	76. Chapter Seventy-Six

**Chapter 76**

Lucien looked at Nesta, Feyre, and Rhysand. It was a little hard to believe that they had come to the Autumn Court to help him. Nobody would have put that much effort into him; nobody but Elain. He turned his head to look at his mate. He hadn’t been surprised that she had come for him. Her worry and determination had been evident when she had walked into the hall, and he had been able to feel her desperation to get him free. Elain would have agreed to just about anything Eris had asked for if it meant that Lucien had been released, he knew that. It terrified him.

When he turned his eyes back on Elain’s sisters, Lucien realised that they hadn’t come to help him. They had come to help her. They had come to the Autumn Court because Elain had called. They had come to protect her, to help her in whatever way they could. Seeing the way Nesta’s cold eyes followed Lucien’s hand on Elain’s wrist, he suddenly feared that they would try and take her from him. Biting back a snarl, Lucien wrapped an arm around Elain’s shoulders, relaxing only slightly when she leaned into him.

Glancing up when Rhys shifted on his feet, Lucien realised that what he had done was not lost on the High Lord of the Night Court. He met those violet eyes, figuring that at least Rhys would understand his reaction. Elain’s hand settled on his leg, rubbing him softly, and he calmed down a little more. Her dark eyes turned on him, and he knew that she must have sensed what he had felt through the bond. Her smile said plainly; _It’s okay_ , but Lucien could not make himself remove the arm from around her. Elain didn’t seem to mind, however, so he didn’t think much more about it.

“What time tomorrow is Eris’ little hearing?” Feyre asked.

“After the midday meal.” Lucien replied, “It gives those with grievances time to travel in from the agricultural communities…”

“Okay, well, I suggest that you keep away from him or the rest of your brothers until then.”

“I’m sure I can come up with something else to do until then…” He grinned when he could practically feel Elain blush at his words.

Nesta’s lip curled and he turned his eyes on her. He had no idea where he stood with Elain’s eldest sister. He vividly remembered hearing Nesta telling Elain that she could do better than him, but he had also overheard her telling Vassa to stay away from him because he was Elain’s mate. He had hoped that Nesta would come to accept him and, overall he supposed that her attitude toward him had warmed, but she looked so thoroughly pissed off right now that he was unsure.

Elain looked at him again and he turned his eyes from Nesta toward her. She looked at him as if trying to read him, and he supposed she was still feeling him through the bond, and wanted to figure out his confusion. Lifting his free hand to her cheek, Lucian leaned toward her and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. Elain’s hand shifted from his leg and her hand slid around behind him, encircling his waist as she leaned further into him, her head coming to rest gently against his shoulder. Feyre was watching them with interest now.

“How was Winter?” Rhys asked after a moment.

“I did send you my…”

“Yes,” Rhys waved a hand, “But I want your personal impression…”

“Kallias has some good ideas.” Lucien replied, “He seems really driven to get those trade routes back up and running…”

“And you think that’s beneficial?”

Lucien was actually taken aback. “Why wouldn’t it be?” he asked, “Amarantha shut that down so that she could divide us, exert further control…”

“Yes…” Rhys tilted his head, “And those who re-establish it would have a measure of control…”

“I do not think that is what he seeks…”

“No?”

“No.”

“Kallias and Viviane seem genuinely lovely…” Elain put in. “I… really like them.” Lucien nodded his agreement. He had always liked Viviane, and Kallias had seemed like a good male. This opinion had not changed over the years and, Lucien suspected that, the two of them together would be a powerful force to be reckoned with. He also knew that anything they did, he would approve of. 

“They only want the best for Prythian.” He said, as certain as he had been about anything in his life. Rhys nodded, sliding an arm around Feyre.

“That’s good to know.” Rhys took a step back, half turning toward the door, and drawing Feyre with him. “We shall see you tomorrow…”Lucien watched Rhys and Feyre leave, and then turned his eyes on Nesta who had not moved.

“Nes…” Elain began, and Nesta’s blue-grey eyes flicked toward her sister. “Do you want to talk?”

Lucien tried not to flinch when Nesta’s gaze turned on him. She nodded and he made himself let go of Elain who then got to het feet. Elain turned then and leaned down to press her lips to his in a searing kiss. He did not want to let his mate go, but he did, and he watched as she moved toward her sister and headed for the door. Not wanting Elain to be wandering around where anyone might come across her, for a moment, he thought about telling her to stay. He was about to offer her the room to speak with her sister. He would go for a walk or head somewhere else to give them privacy. Before he had the opportunity to voice the offer, however, Elain and Nesta had disappeared out the door, and Lucien’s voice died in his throat.

Knowing that he needed to do something to keep himself busy, Lucien got to his feet. He ran his fingers through his hair, dragging out any of the tangles that he found. Casting his eyes about the room, he was unable to keep himself from thinking about when he had last stayed here with Elain. This had been the bed upon which they had first spent the night curled around one another. Sure, it had been atop the covers, but Lucien still felt as if that counted. It was here they had really become closer. Their relationship had changed in the Autumn Court, he couldn’t deny that. They had made important steps in their relationship here, and he would never not be thankful for that. 

He headed for the bathroom again, figuring that Elain’s conversation with Nesta would be unlikely to be short. He would have plenty of time to have a bath. After last night in that dirty, freezing cell, Lucien kind of desperately wanted to scrub himself clean. He felt more and more gross the more that he thought about it. They had first grabbed him when he arrived after a day of travelling, and he had been dirty then. Spending all night and part of the day in that cell without the opportunity to wash had been bad enough, but now that he had the chance to rectify that situation, he was feeling worse and worse as the minutes passed.

He had stripped himself off within moments, and he stood eyeing the steaming water as it rose in the tub for several moments. When he judged that the level was high enough, Lucien stepped into the hot water and sank down with a pleasured groan. Closing his eyes as he leaned back against the tub, Lucien couldn’t help but think about how pleasantly his last bath had ended back in the Spring Court when Elain had climbed in with him. Doubting that her conversation with Nesta would end before his water had gone cold, Lucien set about scrubbing his skin. He was tired, and he was rather looking forward to sliding into bed and stretching out in order to get some rest. Last night he hadn’t so much as hoped that he would be free from that cell and that he would be able to wash and crawl into a comfortable bed. He hoped that his good luck would continue tomorrow.


	77. Chapter Seventy-Seven

**Chapter 77**

“Have you fucked him yet?”

“Nesta!” Elain gasped, staring at her sister who was leaning back against the wall in the hallway outside her room.

“What?” Nesta asked, “If you can’t handle talking about it, then you shouldn’t be doing it.”

“I have no problem talking about it.” Elain retorted, even as she felt her face flush scarlet, “But do you have to be so vulgar about it?”

Nesta made a face and crossed her arms across her chest. “Answer the question, then.”

Elain blinked, about to reply that ‘fucking’ wasn’t the word she would use for what she and Lucien had done, but then she thought about how he had been the night before he had left for the Autumn Court. “… Yes.”

“How many times?”

“How many times what?” Elain asked, her eyes sliding from her sister to move up the hallway.

“You know.” Nesta sighed.

“No,” Elain replied simply, looking back to meet her sister’s eyes, “I don’t. If you want to talk about it, if you want to know, you’re going to need to be specific.”

Raising an eyebrow at her, Nesta tilted her head. “Sex.” She said flatly, “How many times?”

“Does that matter?” Elain asked, twisting her hands together. 

“Yes.” Nesta replied, “I… thought … you would have told me.”

Realising that her sister was hurt, Elain bit her lip. “I wanted to.” She said gently, taking a step toward Nesta. “And I was going to… it was… only the day before yesterday.” She paused, “It was right before he came here, and then yesterday I was worried about him… and then this all happened…”

“The day before yesterday?” Nesta asked with a frown, “Is that why you went back to the Spring Court?”

“Yes…” Elain murmured, “There… is this place near the manor that we…”

Nesta held up a hand to silence her, and Elain stopped. “I don’t need all the details.” Nesta’s eyes were a little wide, and Elain watched her sister glance at the door they had just come through before making another face. “How was it?” Nesta asked softly, “… was he…?”

“Was he what?” Elain breathed, her eyes not leaving Nesta’s face.

“…kind?”

“Always.” Elain told her, looking down at her own hands.

“Did you like it?”

Nodding, Elain made herself look up again. “Yes.” She took another step toward Nesta. “I did…” drawing a slow breath, she went on, “A lot… I… Ness… I wanted to be sure. I wanted that before I accepted the bond, as myself… without losing my control…”

“And you still want it.”

Elain nodded again. “Yes.”

“You’re going to accept the bond.”

“…Yes.”

“When?”

She bit her lip then, looking at Nesta thoughtfully. “I don’t know. Probably when we’re done visiting the courts…”

“Providing Eris lets him leave alive.” Elain felt as if she had been punched in the stomach, and Nesta evidently saw it on her face, because her sister pushed away from the wall and moved to take her arm. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean it… Well, I’m sure it will be fine. All he has to do is say what Eris wants him to say, and it will be fine.”

“He’s never good at controlling what he says.” Elain murmured, “That’s why he has that scar…”

“Oh…” Nesta sounded interested, “I believe that…” Elain glanced at her, and Nesta smiled. “I doubt he’d risk saying anything that might get him killed here.” Her sister paused, “Especially with you watching.”

“True.” Elain nodded and then wrapped her arms around her sister. Nesta hugged her tightly in return and Elain felt herself relax. “Thank you…” She murmured, “For coming to help.”

*

Lucien had just warmed the bed up when the door opened and Elain came back into the room. She walked to the edge of the bed and then told him that she was going to wash quickly. He just nodded and his eyes followed her to the bathroom. As he listened to the water begin to run, Lucien rolled onto his side and closed his eyes. He wasn’t aware of how much time passed, but his eyes opened again when he felt the bed dip as Elain slipped under the covers with him. 

When her soft hands came around his waist, Lucien rolled to face her, and one of her hands lifted to his cheek. He smiled gently at her, sliding his own arms around her waist and drawing her closer against himself. 

“You smell good.” Elain’s voice was soft, and Lucien smiled at her. 

“I’m pleased you like it.” He murmured, pressing his lips to her forehead. One of her hands moved up his back as she tucked herself more tightly against him, her head tucking up beneath his chin. Lucien closed his eyes, shuddering slightly when he felt her press a kiss of her own to his chest. He had longed for this last night. When he had been locked in that cell, not knowing if he was going to be put to his death in the morning; not knowing if he would ever get to see Elain again. As if reading his thoughts, Elain stroked his back tenderly, pressing her lips to his chest once more. 

“It’s okay.” She told him, and he nodded, laying his cheek against the top of her head. She was warm and soft, and Lucien had to make a conscious effort not to squeeze her too tightly. Elain’s hand continued to stroke his back, slowly, lazily, and he began to relax in a way he had not since he had come to the Autumn Court. 

“Of course it is.” He breathed, “Everything is okay when I can hold you like this…” Elain’s head moved and, an instant later, Lucien felt her press a kiss to his jaw. “I panicked when I first saw you walk into the hall,” he told her, “But I am so thankful you are here.”

“Mhmm…” She hummed her response, her hand still stroking his back. 

“I’m impressed you got Tam to come with you.”

“He volunteered.” She replied. “I just told him I was coming and he came with me.”

“Oh…” Lucien thought about that. “The others came because you called, too…”

She lifted her head to meet his eyes then. “Is it so hard to believe people care about you?” Something twinged inside Lucien at those words and he stroked a finger softly down Elain’s cheek.

“It’s not something I’m particularly familiar with…” he murmured, and Elain’s eyes narrowed at him. 

“Well, get used to it.” She told him simply. He smiled and gave a small huff of a chuckle. 

“As you say, Petal.”

Elain slid her fingers up Lucien’s jaw and into his hair, and he watched her face as she did so. She bit her lower lip, her dark eyes moving across his face, and he wished that he could read her mind. “I was scared.” She breathed and Lucien frowned, “When I had that vision of you…”

“I know.” Lucien pressed a soft kiss to the tip of her nose. 

“I was scared that you would die before I accepted the bond…”

Lucien was sure that his heart had stopped beating in his chest, and he stared at her. Forcing himself to swallow, he tightened an arm around her waist. That she had even considered that pleased him to no end, and he pulled her closer, more firmly against himself. “I’m not going to die.” He managed to get the words out and Elain nodded as if she believed him. 

“You promise?”

“I promise.” There was certainly no way he was going to allow himself to die before she accepted the bond. He was absolutely going to be around for that. That was all he wanted in the entire world.

“Okay.” She tucked her head back up under his chin, and Lucien settled against her. “Perfect.” Her hand began making small, lazy, circles on his back again, and Lucien allowed it to lull him toward the blissful darkness and warmth of sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those interested, I posted a little one-shot today.  
> It was something I considered briefly for this story back after the first time Lucien and Elain visited Spring and Lucien was surprised by how much Tamlin liked Elain.


	78. Chapter Seventy-Eight

**Chapter 78**

Lucien awoke first. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, he smiled gently when he found Elain laying beside him, on her back, her hair splayed out across her pillow, and one of her hands stretched out to lay gently against his arm, wanting to touch him even in sleep. Carefully, Lucien lifted his own hand to gently take hers, lacing their fingers together, his eyes remaining on her face. He smiled more widely when she stirred and her eyes opened.

“Morning, my love.”

Elain smiled sleepily, looking back at him, and Lucien lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her skin. “Good morning.” She breathed, turning her hand from his kiss to cup his cheek. Lucien slid his fingers up her forearm then lifted it to brush a lock of hair back from her face. Elain shuffled closer as she met his eyes and he couldn’t so much as look away from her. “What will we do this morning?” she asked, “Considering we don’t have to be anywhere particular until after lunch…” her fingers trailed his jaw as she looked at him, and Lucien knew what _he_ would like to do all morning…

“Well…” he murmured, his hand slipping around the back of her neck as she turned onto her side to face him better. Thinking about what he had done the night before in the bathroom, the way he had just picked her up and pushed her into that wall, yanking her dress out of the way without so much as a warning for what he had been about to do, Lucien paused. Just because they had now been intimate didn’t mean he could have her whenever he liked. 

“Yes…?” she asked, smiling at him, and Lucien’s heartrate quickened when Elain hooked a foot around his leg, bending her knee as she slid it higher, “Did you have an idea…?”

“I might…” his breath caught when Elain’s gentle fingers traced his scar from his brow to his jaw and she closed the small distance between them to touch a soft kiss to his lips.

“Might be the same idea I have.” She whispered.

“You think so?” he asked, trying to sound casual. _Mate. Touch her, smell her, taste her-_

“I have that suspicion…”

Lucien slid his hand from the back of her neck, around and down over her shoulder, and then down to rest gently against her chest, feeling her heart beat beneath it. The rhythm was just about matched to his own and he smiled gently. “If you want to…”

Nodding, Elain kissed him again, and Lucien needed no further encouragement. He rolled atop her, enjoying the way she spread beneath him, her dark eyes holding his own as her hands slid to his shoulders. “I love you.” He murmured, his lips ghosting across her cheekbone to her ear. He felt one of her hands slide into his hair and he heard her give a soft gasp when he began drawing her silken nightdress up her legs. When he had it pulled up to her waist, his hands went to the thin straps at her shoulders, pushing it down to meet the hem around her middle. Her arms snaked around his neck then, and he kicked his pants away as quickly as he could. “Tell me how this feels…” his words were soft, gentle, but the hand he slid between her thighs was sure and certain about what it was doing. He enjoyed the soft gasp Elain gave as her hips jerked beneath him and he used his other hand, pressed against the silken nightdress bunched around her, to hold her down flat on the mattress. As he withdrew the hand between her thighs, Lucien carefully pressed his weight down upon her, his lips claiming hers one again, his blood quickening in his veins when she parted her lips for him instantly. 

Sliding a hand up her side, Lucien traced her soft skin slowly. He enjoyed the way she arched beneath him, reacting to his touch, her hands clutching at him when he cupped one of her breasts gently, his thumb flicking across her nipple. He grinned at her sharp intake of breath, lifting his head to be able to see her face once more. 

“Now…” she murmured, one of her feet hooking behind his knee. “Lucien…”

“Okay…” Carefully, he pushed into her, stilling when her hands tightened on his shoulders.

“Ah-aah…” Her nails dug into him, and Lucien forced himself to remain still as she released a deep breath. When her grip on him softened, he pressed another kiss to her cheek, one hand caressing her and brushing her hair back from her face. “Mmm… alright…” she nodded a little and he smiled. 

Reminding himself that they had only been together the day before he had come here, and she wasn’t exactly used to this yet, Lucien considered. He hadn’t been as gentle as he should have been that evening, allowing himself to get caught up in his fear and anxiety, but he wouldn’t do that now. She had come for him, walking right into a situation she knew neither of them might walk away from, and he was going to return that love with everything she deserved. 

“Tell me…” he breathed, rolling his hips slowly, and listening to the way she drew a gasping breath, “how this feels…”

Elain nodded, and Lucien felt her legs tighten around him. “Nnm… do that again…”

He rolled his hips again, the same way, watching her face as her eyes slid closed and she smiled. “Like that, Petal?”

“Yes…” her hand on his shoulder began tracing small, gentle, circles into his skin and Lucien shuddered. 

He began to lose his focus, moving over her, inside of her. She was soft and warm, and every touch he made on her was rewarded with some soft sound of appreciation. Lucien panted, moving slowly, as she began to move with him. One of her hands slid down his back to his hip and he felt her trying to guide his movements. Lucien did what he thought she wanted, and was pleased to receive a soft moan from Elain in response. “That good?” he asked, his voice a little breathless. 

She gasped her response. “Ye-yes…” her other hand tugged at his hair, her fingers sliding through it and then curling and holding tightly. “Ah… yeah…”

He began murmuring in her ear, telling her how good she felt, how perfect she was. He told her what else he would like to do to her, and he groaned when he felt her begin to tighten around him. His blood pounded in his ears when she moaned his name, her hips lifting to meet his. Lucien felt her hand on his cheek then and he blinked in surprise. 

“Look at me…” she breathed, and he lifted his head to meet her eyes. Her lips were parted, and her cheeks were flushed, as she drew one gasping breath after another. Lucien placed careful fingers against her cheek, his gaze locked on hers as he continued to move slowly inside of her. “Lucien…” She whimpered his name, and Lucien pressed his lips gently to hers, rolling his hips again the way he had worked out she liked. When she gasped into his kiss, he gave a soft chuckle, and began to move more quickly. Elain whimpered again, and Lucien pressed his forehead to hers, his eyes still holding her piercing gaze as she moved with him. 

Groaning with the effort to maintain his rhythm, Lucien clenched a handful of the sheet beneath them. He heard Elain’s breathing change, felt her fingernails prick his skin, before she gave a small cry, her back arching beneath him. He kept pushing until she had shrieked his name, and then he had buried his face in her neck and hair, groaning his own release as her nails raked down his back. 

Neither of them moved for several long moments, content to lay as they were, wrapped in one another, joined by sweat slicked skin and a tangle of hair and limbs. Eventually, Elain carefully removed her hand from where she had knotted it in Lucien’s hair, and he felt her attempting to smooth it down. “I think we should clean up, Petal.” He murmured, and felt her nod her agreement.

Wordlessly, Lucien scooped her up in his arms and shuffled to the edge of the bed, before carrying her into the bathroom. It was still morning, and they had several hours before they would need to be at Eris’ meeting. There were things around the House that Lucien thought he might like to show Elain that he hadn’t had the chance to show her last time. There appeared to be positives to coming here again after all.


	79. Chapter Seventy-Nine

**Chapter 79**

The clash of metal on metal rang around them and Elain tilted her head. Lucien’s hand squeezed hers and she looked up to see his eyes, russet and gold, on her. “What is that?” she asked.

“Sounds like fighting.” Nesta said simply, and Lucien nodded.

“It’s the training square…” He flashed Elain a grin, “Want to see?”

“Sure…” Elain nodded while Nesta made a face. “Did you learn to fight here…?”

“Yes.” He said, steering her around a corner. “My brothers and I all learned here. Some of them spent all their time here, in fact.”

“And what did you do?” Elain asked, and he smiled at her. 

“I learned as many other things as I could.”

“Hiding from them?” Nesta asked, and Elain saw Lucien flash a glance at her older sister before he nodded simply. 

“Sometimes.” He replied.

Elain shifted her gaze to Nesta. Her sister had accompanied she and Lucien on their walk around the Forest House from the moment they had left their room after bathing that morning. She had thought, at first, that Feyre and Rhys would also join them, but the other couple had failed to appear, and Nesta had suggested that they be left to their own devices. Looking at Nesta’s face, Elain noticed when her sister’s perfectly arched eyebrows lifted in surprise, and she turned her own attention to the square they had just walked into.

There were weapons everywhere. That was the first thing Elain noticed. Weapons and equipment. There were also many more faeries than she had anticipated. Most of them, Elain noted, were High Fae, but there were a few who were not. All of them seemed to be going about some task or other, and nobody was standing idle. At first glance, it appeared to be chaotic, but the longer Elain watched, she noticed the order among the chaos. 

Following Lucien as he led her around the edge of the square, Elain noticed that several of Lucien’s brothers appeared to be sparring nearby. They stopped as Lucien approached, and vulpine grins appeared on their faces. “Ahh, little brother!” one called, striding closer. 

Lucien stopped, holding an arm out in front of Elain and Nesta, trying to keep them behind him. Elain paused, staying where she was, but Nesta stepped around Lucien’s arm, facing the two redheaded faeries who came to stand before them. Looking carefully at them, Elain noticed that one of them was the brother who had fought Lucien in the forest when they had tried to flee the court during the coup. He was the one who had threatened her; the one she had stabbed. His amber eyes slid toward Elain and she saw the recognition in them, knew that he had just remembered the same thing she had. 

“Come back to play some more?” He asked, giving her a wink. 

Elain slid closer to Lucien who moved a little more in front of her. “Don’t get excited, Tallan,” Lucien said, his hand sliding into Elain’s once more. “We’re just walking through.”

“You sure?” Tallan pressed, “Go a round with me, Lucien.”

“I don’t think so.” Lucien went to move, drawing Elain with him, but Tallan stepped closer, blocking their path. Elain watched the grin on the older faerie’s face widen. 

“Come on now,” he simpered, “You wouldn’t want your little mate to think you don’t have it in you. She might think you can’t protect her… if something were to happen…”

Elain felt Lucien go rigid, saw him stand a little straighter. His jaw was set firmly, and she knew that he was going to give in. 

“No…” she whispered to him, remembering how Tallan had beat him the last time they had fought. 

“I’ll get you a sword…” Tallan winked at Elain and turned to go and fetch what he needed. 

Lucien turned to Elain and she could see the apology in his face. “Elain…”

“No.” she whispered, “He’ll kill you…”

“You know he’s goading you.” This was Nesta, and Elain felt her sister move to stand at her back.

“If I don’t do it, they’ll see it as a weakness.” Lucien said gently, “They’ll think they can do whatever they like to us…” his eyes focused on Elain again, “… to you.” She gave a soft sigh when one of his hands slid from her wrist up to her elbow, gently stroking her skin. “It’s only a practice ring. It’ll be fine.”

Shaking her head, Elain watched helplessly as Lucien shrugged out of his jacket and began rolling the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows so that he could move more freely. “Can you beat him?” she asked softly and Lucien’s eyes met hers.

“I don’t know.” He said after a moment, but she heard the ‘Probably not’ behind his words. Lucien’s gaze shifted to Nesta then and, a moment later, Nesta’s hand came to rest on Elain’s shoulder.

“Be careful.”

“Of course, Petal.” He gave her a smile and bent to press a gentle kiss to her cheek, and then he had turned and was striding toward where Tallan waited for him in the centre of a large square painted on the ground.

“Nesta…” Elain murmured, and her sister began to rub her shoulder. 

“They won’t kill him here.” Nesta said softly, “That would ruin Eris’ plan.”

Elain bit her lip. She wasn’t sure that Tallan or the other brothers cared all that much about Eris’ plans. Malak certainly hadn’t. It seemed to Elain that it was each of them for themselves. Watching as Lucien took the sword Tallan held out to him, Elain tried to calm herself. She drew one deep breath after another, trying to force herself to breathe more deeply, to keep her heartrate steady. She heard the moment Lucien’s own heartrate accelerated, and it was the instant that Tallan smiled at him, raising his own sword. Reaching out, Elain grabbed at her sister’s arm an instant before a new clash of metal on metal met her ears.

At first, the two redheaded faeries circled one another, trading light blows here and there and, just for a few moments, Elain thought that it really would be a regular practice sparring match. She had let out a relieved breath, and cast a glance at Nesta, giving her sister a soft smile. But then, Tallan swung high and Lucien was forced to fling himself backward, bending at a nearly impossible angle to avoid being struck in the face or throat. Elain’s heart felt as if it had dropped into her stomach, and Nesta’s hand instantly tightened on her, holding her where she was.

The other brother, who had been practising with Tallan, came to stand by them and Elain could see him grinning widely, even from the corner of her eye. “How terribly exciting.” He said, and Elain frowned, trying not to let him draw her into whatever he was attempting. “You know,” he continued, “I don’t ever actually remember Lucien beating Tallan…”

“I’m sure a lot has changed since you last saw him fight.” Elain muttered.

“Yes…” he replied, “Tallan has spent the years training and battling the best warriors the Autumn Court has to offer… I imagine Lucien has been sitting pretty in the Spring Court, dining and tending the flowers…”

Elain swallowed, not knowing what to say, but Nesta saved her from having to speak. “Is this the best the Autumn Court has to offer?” her sister asked, her tone mocking. 

“Are you not impressed, Lady?”

“Not really.” Nesta sniffed, “I’ve seen Illyrian training camps. Trained with some of them myself…” Elain turned her head enough to see her sister’s face when Nesta went on. “Cassian could wipe the floor with each and every one of you.”

Her eyes flicking to the redheaded faerie standing beside her, Elain couldn’t hold back a smile. He looked stunned at first, if not a little wary. His vulpine grin returned after a moment, however, and he looked back at Nesta. “You’ve trained?” he asked her, “Perhaps you’d let me give you a bit of a workout. I could really help you build up a sweat.”

Elain felt her cheeks heat in a blush, but the rage that washed off of Nesta was palpable. “I doubt it.”

“I don’t know…” he chuckled, “Think you could do with a bit of fire to melt that ice in you…”

“Do you?” Nesta’s tone was flat, and suggested that she didn’t care about what he thought at all. Elain’s eyes returned to the fight, and she watched with bated breath as Lucien deflected blow after blow from his brother, any of which could have cleaved him in half if it had been able to land.

“You’ve played with Illyrians…” he went on, “Let me teach you what real Fae can do. Besides, you’ve not fucked until you’ve fucked with an Autumn Court male…”

Elain turned wide eyes on him, watching as he moved, around her, toward Nesta. “You keep that hand to yourself if you don’t want to lose it.” Her sister snapped, and Elain shuffled away from the both of them, one eye still on Lucien. 

Having apparently heard the tone in Nesta’s voice, or seen the movement, Lucien turned his head their way, his eyes flicking over them quickly, as if to check on them. Tallan’s blade caught him across the chest an instant later and Elain gasped, making to move toward him, but Nesta caught her wrist, stopping her. Lucien wheeled away from his brother, switching his sword to his other hand and, when she could see him properly again, Elain’s eyes caught on the blossoming bloodstain now evident against the white of his shirt. 

“Lucien…”

Lucien held his hand out to her, telling her to keep back, before he blocked Tallan’s next slash at him, wincing as he did so. Elain couldn’t breathe. She could feel his determination and his pain, and she could feel her own panic rising within her. When Nesta pulled her back, Elain tried to get free, struggling to keep her eyes on Lucien, keep her focus, when tears blurred her vision. 

“Come now, Lucien…” Tallan taunted, “That’s what happens when you allow yourself to be distracted…”

The brother standing beside Elain chuckled, and then she realised that he had intended to be exactly that. He had come to speak to them hoping to distract Lucien. She and Nesta moved away from him, Elain keeping her eyes on Lucien the entire time. He was dripping blood now, creating a little trail of scarlet drops as he moved, circling Tallan as his brother attacked and withdrew repeatedly. 

“This has to stop…” Elain breathed, and Nesta squeezed her hand. Elain could see Lucien weakening, slowing, his movements less fluid and less precise. He was continually retreating now as Tallan advanced, and he was continually trying to defend himself, with no time to do anything else. 

“What’s the matter, Lucien?” Tallan laughed, “Need your mate to jump in to save you again?” Lucien didn’t reply and Tallan laughed again, “Don’t worry. I’ll comfort her when you’re dead.”

Clutching at Nesta, Elain flinched when she heard Lucien’s grunt of pain as Tallan’s blade sliced across his forearm. He switched his sword back to his original hand, and she heard another grunt of pain as he tried to lift it again. “No…” she murmured, trying to step forward again, “No…”

She tugged free of Nesta’s grip, and had just managed two steps toward Lucien when another voice rang out, clear and commanding. 

“That is enough.”

Everyone in the training square froze, and dozens of pairs of eyes turned to watch as the Lady of the Autumn Court strode toward them, red hair fanning out behind her. Elain gave a soft sigh of relief, her eyes going back to Lucien as he dropped the sword, and went down on one knee. As Ashk moved closer, putting herself between Tallan and Lucien, Elain threw herself toward her mate, crashing down to her own knees before him, hands reaching out but unsure of where to touch him. 

“Lucien?”


	80. Chapter Eighty

**Chapter 80**

“Lucien…?” Elain gingerly reached out to him, lifting his chin so that she could see his face. “Lucien…?” she could hear the panic in her own voice, and she was having difficulty drawing a complete breath. 

“It’s okay, Petal…” his voice was strained, and she could hear the pain in it. 

“Let me see…” she pulled his shirt open so that she could see the gash across his chest, “Oh, my…” blood was oozing at an alarming rate and Elain pressed her hand to it without thinking. Lucien hissed in pain and Elain looked at his face again. He was deathly pale and she swallowed thickly. “Are you healing yourself?” she breathed, even as his blood leaked between her fingers and ran up her wrist. “Lucien…”

He nodded almost imperceptibly before his eyes closed, and Elain tried not to cry. She continued to press on his chest, watching his face, and hoping that the blood would stop flowing. It had reached her elbows, and she could feel it dripping slowly onto her lap. Unable to make herself look away from Lucien, Elain was only vaguely aware of Nesta coming to stand behind her. Her sister’s hand touched Elain’s shoulder gently, but she couldn’t so much as turn to look up at her.

It wasn’t until Lucien opened his eyes, that familiar golden eye clicking and whirring as he focused on her face, that Elain released a breath she hadn’t realised she had been holding. “It’s okay, Petal.” He said again, “You can let go…” he lifted one of his own hands to her bloody wrist, lowering her hand from his chest. Elain could see that the wound had mostly sealed, although a nasty looking line was still visible where he had been sliced open. “I’m sorry,” he breathed, and she met his gaze, “I’m sorry…”

Shaking her head, Elain just stared at him. He had nothing to apologise for. One of her bloodied hands lifted back up to take a handful of his shirt tightly in her fist as she tried to slow her panicked breathing down. He had healed himself, and was no longer bleeding. “Are you going to be okay?” she murmured, and he nodded. Elain instantly threw her arms around his neck, not caring that everyone in the training square was currently looking their way. She held herself tightly to him, feeling his blood soak into the front of her dress, and still not caring. “I love you.” She breathed, “I love you so much…”

“I know.” Lucien’s lips brushed her ear and he whispered his response, “and I love you…” his arms encircled Elain’s waist as she pulled back enough to meet his eyes. He gave her a small smile, and she went higher on her knees, her hands sliding up the back of his neck, until she could lean forward and press a soft kiss to his forehead. There was blood all over the both of them now, and it took Elain a few more moments to realise this, at which point she went very still. It was evident that Lucien had noticed her reaction, and correctly identified the cause for it. His hands slid beneath her elbows as he lifted her to her feet, getting to his own with a soft groan. “Let’s get cleaned up…”

Elain became aware of the others around them then, and she looked up at Nesta who was still standing protectively by her. Her sister’s eyes moved over her quickly before she nodded. “You’re covered in blood…”

“Yes.” Elain murmured, glancing around when Lucien’s mother approached them. 

Ashk’s hand came out, gently touching her son’s arm as she looked at him, and Elain watched as he smiled reassuringly at her. “You don’t have all that long before Eris will be expecting you…”

“I know.” He said softly. “I won’t be late…”

Nesta followed Elain and Lucien as they left the training square, and remained behind them all the way back to their room. Elain had been half expecting her sister to leave them then, but Nesta followed them into the room and seated herself on the orange velvet couch by the wall. She had not said a word the entire time, and Elain cast a questioning glance her way as Lucien headed for the bathroom. “Nes?”

“How do you know they won’t come for you here?”

“If they try again,” Lucien muttered, pausing in the door to the bathroom, “it will be as another spectacle, with an audience, and a way to claim it was an accident.”

Nesta just nodded and fell silent once more. Holding her bloodied hands up to show her sister, Elain flicked a glance at her pack. “Could you get me a clean dress?” she asked, and Nesta nodded again. Elain turned and followed Lucien into the bathroom and to the sink. The blood on her hands was no longer sticky, but had dried into a crusty sort of substance, and it had become difficult to bend her fingers. Lucien filled the sink, and then stepped aside so that she could put her hands into the water. She did so, her eyes following him, as he gingerly pulled his ruined shirt off and began filling the bathrub. He was caked in blood nearly the colour of his hair, and Elain’s eyes continued to move over him, from his chest to the place he had been wounded on his arm. Before she could say anything, however, Nesta entered the bathroom, draping one of Elain’s dresses over a towel rack, and then retreating to the bedroom again, pulling the door most of the way closed. Elain turned her gaze back on Lucien.

“Are you finished healing?” she asked quietly, and he shook his head. 

“Not quite.”

Elain swallowed thickly, “Are you still in pain?”

He looked at her then, his metallic eye whirring. “Not a great deal.” He replied, “It’s like when a wound has mostly healed, and you don’t feel it until you move it or pull it and it just feels… tight…”

Elain bent further into the sink, washing the blood from her forearms. Lucien undid his pants before kicking them into he corner of the bathroom and stepping into the tub as Elain watched. Once she was satisfied that she had removed all of the blood from her skin, she pulled off her own ruined dress and tossed it into the corner of the room in which Lucien’s clothing sat. “…Tallan would have actually killed you.”

“Mhm.” Lucien’s eyes slid toward Elain, meeting her gaze with what appeared to be resignation. Elain’s heart ached at that acceptance. Brothers shouldn’t be like that with one another, and she couldn’t ever imagine what it would have felt like if her sisters had hated one another enough to try and murder one another. Turning away, before he could read her expression, Elain moved to pick up the clean dress Nesta had fetched for her. She slipped it over her head and laced the front quickly before she turned back to Lucien.   
Watching him for a moment, Elain bit her lip at the way he was gingerly rubbing at his chest with a washcloth, trying to remove the dried blood from his skin. She took several steps toward him, reaching out to trail her fingers across his broad shoulders as he leaned back against the side of the tub. Then, stopping behind him, Elain leaned over to take the washcloth from his hand and she dipped it slowly into the water before returning it to his chest. Carefully, she worked at washing him clean, making sure she was especially gentle as she moved over the faint scar she could still make out which was evidently still healing.  
“When Tamlin injured you last time…” she began softly, still stroking methodically with the washcloth. “You needed to sleep to rest after you healed…”  
“I did.”  
“…Will that happen again?”  
“After Eris’’ meeting.” He said, and she could hear the exhaustion in his voice. Elain dipped the washcloth again, leaning further over his shoulder to do so, before wiping the last of the blood from him.   
“I’m not letting you out of my sight for the rest of the day.” She told him simply and he chuckled lightly.   
“I like the sound of that.”   
“Good.” Elain dropped the washcloth back into the water, both of her hands sliding up his arms to his shoulder again as she leaned over him once more. Lucien looked up at her with a smile and Elain bent to press a soft kiss to his forehead. “I’ll get you some fresh clothes.” She murmured, straightening again.  
“Thank you.” He smiled gratefully at her before sliding down into the water to rinse his hair and Elain headed back out into the bedroom, where Nesta was still sitting and waiting on the orange couch.   
“Is he okay?” her sister asked, and Elain nodded.   
“Yes.”   
“I’ve never seen you like that…” Nesta’s voice was soft and Elain paused, picking up Lucien’s pack. She looked around at her older sister and considered her response for a moment.   
“I’d just seen my mate hurt…”  
“I know.” Nesta murmured, her long fingers trailing over her dress, smoothing it down. “You do feel it as much as he does…”  
“Yes, Nesta.” Elain watched her sister take that in, before she opened the pack and began sorting through the clean shirts inside. When she had chosen what Lucien needed, she took them back into the bathroom for him


	81. Chapter Eighty-One

**Chapter 81**

Standing with his back to the wall, Lucien watched as the room filled up with High Fae and Lesser Fae from around the Autumn Court. He hadn’t seen the place this crowded since well before Jesminda had been killed and he had left. Beron had only held things like this once every few years, and had never liked his House full of those he didn’t know and trust. He had also never been one to invite Lesser Fae in when he could help it. It made the room seem smaller and less imposing. Also, he figured, safer. Surely nothing terrible could happen in front of so many witnesses.

As the room continued to fill, the chatter of the fae rising in the air, Elain’s soft hand slid into Lucien’s, and he closed his fingers firmly around it. “You’re just going to do what he wants, aren’t you?” she asked quietly. 

Lucien turned his head to look at her, the worry clear in her brown eyes. “Yes, Petal.” He replied gently, “He only wants me to renounce my claim. I already did that, years ago. He just wants me to do it publicly… specific to his throne, and not Beron’s.”

“And you will…”

“Of course…” He gave her a reassuring smile, even as he felt exhaustion wash through him. Elain’s eyes widened as she looked up at him, and he knew that she was aware of how he felt.   
“It won’t take long…”

“Alright…” she slipped closer, her free hand coming up to take hold of his forearm, hugging his arm to her as she leaned into him. Dipping his head to press a kiss to the top of Elain’s head, Lucien smiled, and they waited for the flow of faeries into the room to slow and cease.

By the time the doors were closed, Lucien was fighting to stay awake. He was tired. Healing himself from a wound as severe as the one Tallan had given him always took most of his energy, and he really did need to rest. The noise in the room was almost a constant buzz and it was almost lulling him into a daze until, as Eris arrived, the room went silent. 

Lucien was vaguely aware of Nesta, Feyre and Rhys approaching to stand on the other side of Elain, and they all watched as Eris took his seat in his throne on the dais. “Will we have to stay for the whole thing?” Elain asked, and Lucien felt her tighten her hold on his arm. 

“Probably most of it.” He murmured, “Eris will hear the reports and requests first…”

“Okay.” She lay her cheek against his arm, and fell silent. Lucien’s glaze flicked to his eldest brother, watching as Eris motioned for the first faerie to come forward to speak.

It was the same as it always was with these things, and Lucien felt himself zoning out. The faeries from the agricultural communities brought their requests and suggestions for what Eris could do to ensure they had a successful harvest, and Lucien’s mind began to wander. His eyes flickered around the room, scanning the faces he saw, half wondering if he knew any of them from his time with Jesminda. He did not see anyone he recognised, but he supposed that was a good thing. Nobody he had known from back then would have been too pleased to see him these days, not after what he had let happen.

A long while later, Lucien was just about leaning back against the wall to keep himself upright when the requests had come to an end. He forced himself to look back to Eris, trying to listen, when his brother got to his feet and began to talk about his plans for progress and change. The faeries around the room seemed apprehensive, and Lucien had expected no less. Eris had spent centuries developing his reputation of ruthlessness and cruelty. No doubt it was expected that Eris’ reign would continue much like Beron’s had before him. Eventually, Lucien heard his name and he blinked, standing straight on his feet once more. He felt Elain release his arm and he blinked again, trying to clear his head. 

“Lucien, if you don’t mind…” Eris gestured to the place before the dais, and Lucien forced himself to move forward, coming to stand in the place he was supposed to. Bowing his head slightly, he listened again. “You are here to renounce your position as one of the heirs to the throne of the Autumn Court?”

“I am.” Lucien replied, as he should.

“Then say the words.”

His head still bowed, and his eyes fixed on one spot on the stone floor, Lucien tried to recall the proper words. “I am Lucien Vanserra,” he began, wincing internally at the use of Beron’s name, “Son of Beron Vanserra,” he couldn’t help glancing up at his mother, standing near Eris, at that point. “Son of the Autumn Court… and I renounce any and all ties to that name.” Lucien drew a slow breath, “I acknowledge Eris Vanserra as the High Lord of the Autumn Court, and offer no challenge to his reign or to his throne.” He swept into a swift courtly bow, and then stood straight to meet Eris’ amber eyes.

Nodding his head once in acknowledgement, Eris held Lucien’s gaze for a moment, before looking around at the rest of the court. “You are all witnesses to this…” Eris moved a hand, gesturing that Lucien was free to move again, and Lucien turned instantly, heading for the wall once again to where Elain was waiting. Her hand slid into his the instant he was beside her, and Lucien listened to the soft murmur that seemed to slither around the room. When Eris announced that, as a celebration for his taking of the throne and position of High Lord, he would dismiss this year’s collection of the Tithe, that murmuring grew louder, and far more excited. It was a good move, Lucien thought. It would win Eris positive favour with most of his new subjects, without him having to actually tarnish his carefully constructed reputation.

“Can we go…?” Elain asked softly, and Lucien nodded. He let her pull him slowly toward the door, weaving among the faeries who stood about the place, most of their attention still focused on Eris up on the dais.

“I am looking forward to a nice rest…” Lucien murmured as they reached the hallway and headed for their room. 

“Don’t think that just because you’ve renounced your name that we’ll forget about you.” Tallan’s voice froze Lucien to the spot, and he turned his head to see his brother trailing after them up the hallway. 

“I’m certain you can find something else to entertain yourself.” Lucien replied, trying not to roll his eyes.

“You’re probably right…” Tallan smirked, and Lucien did not miss his brother’s amber eyes slide past him to settle on Elain. Stepping more completely in front of Elain, Lucien bared his teeth. “You’ll pay.” Tallan went on, “You and Tamlin, for what you did to our brothers…”

“Defended myself?” Lucien asked, “Be thankful we let you run home…”

Tallan growled then, and looked as if he were about to say something, when he was suddenly shoved to the side. Lucien blinked in surprise as Nesta pushed past Tallan.

“Get out of the way.” She snarled, “You’re blocking the hallway with your pathetic threats and ugly face.”

Lucien watched Tallan turn his incredulous eyes on Nesta, his mouth just about hanging open in disbelief. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” Nesta folded her arms, looking Tallan over, her expression reading distaste. 

“This conversation was between my brother and I…”

“My sister and her mate have somewhere to be.” Nesta said flatly, “They’re not interested in a conversation with you.”

“That’s not up to you.”

“It is." Nesta muttered, “Unless you want to go through me, and if you try I’ll rip your own arms off and beat you to death with them.”

Lucien thought perhaps Nesta had been spending a little too much time with Amren.

Tallan just narrowed his eyes at Nesta, before turning and striding away up the hallway. Nesta turned to face them, then. 

“Thanks…” Elain said softly and Lucien saw Nesta’s expression soften as she looked at her sister. 

“Go and rest.” Was all Nesta said before she, too, strode away up the hallway. Elain’s hand tightened on Lucien’s then, and he allowed her to pull him toward their room and the soft bed he could not wait to collapse upon.


	82. Chapter Eighty-Two

**Chapter 82**

A knife in the dark was what drew Lucien from sleep. As he opened his eyes, he could make out the cool blade pressed to his throat, and he was careful not to move as his eyes tried to adjust. Elain was no longer beside him, Lucien noticed before he tried to even move and, as he reached a hand out to where she had been beside him when he’d fallen asleep, the blade at his throat pressed closer.

“Uh-uh… Keep still…” 

Lucien’s heartbeat increased in pace at the sound of his brother, Connal’s voice. “What… do you want?”

“Not much…” Connal said, an instant before there was a flash of flame and the fireplace erupted into a merrily burning fire. The point of the knife indicated for Lucien to sit up, and he struggled to do so, leaning back against the headboard. 

“Wha-” He lurched forward when he saw Elain, only to be shoved back against the headboard, the blade digging into his throat as a warning. Unable to take his eyes off of Elain, Lucien fought down panic. Elain was bent over the edge of the bed, pinned face down by Tallan who had one hand pressed to the back of her neck, and one of his knees pressed into her lower back. Tallan’s amber eyes were on Lucien, and his brother grinned, running his free hand down Elain’s side.

“Lucien…” Elain whimpered, meeting his eyes from where she was pinned to the mattress, her cheek firm against the covers. Lucien could see her tears, glinting in the flickering firelight, and he swallowed another wave of panic. 

“It’s okay, my love…” he murmured, holding her gaze, willing her to believe him. “It’s going to be okay.”

“You can’t tell her that.” Tallan chuckled, the fingers of his roving hand coming up to trace the thin straps of Elain’s silken nightdress. “Her idea of okay is the two of you walking out of here… and that’s not going to happen.”

Lucien lifted his eyes to meet Tallan’s again. “Let her go…”

“Nah.”

“Tallan…” Lucien snarled, “This has nothing to do with her.”

Tallan tilted his head, smirking at Lucien, and slowly dragged the straps of Elain’s nightdress off of her shoulders. Lucien heard her soft whimper, and surged forward again, knocking the blade from Connal’s hand as he did so. He hadn’t had time to dive across the bed, to get his hands on Tallan and rip him away from Elain, before Connal had pulled a larger blade, forcing him back once again. Lucien couldn’t so much as take his eyes off of Elain, Tallan now stroking his fingers across her bare shoulders.   
Elain’s dark eyes were trained on Lucien, even as her tears slid into the bedspread she was pressed against. He wanted to tell her it would be okay again. He didn’t care what Tallan said, Lucien would make sure that it would be okay. 

“I told you you’d pay.” Tallan said, amber eyes fixed on Lucien once more. “For what you did to our brothers…”

“Then let Elain go.” Lucien said, “You want me.”

“Nah…” Tallan pressed his knee harder into Elain’s lower back causing her to give a pained cry, her hands clenching at the bedspread. Lucien snarled. “You see?” his brother said casually, “This hurts you… and I do intend on hurting you more.”

“Let her go!”

“And who do you think you are to be giving orders?” Tallan snapped, “You’re nobody. You renounced anything that made you important.”

“If you hurt her, I will destroy you.”

Tallan laughed then. “It’s going to be one or both of you…” He said, his hand moving across Elain’s bare back now. “And I think doing this hurts you worse than anything we could do to you directly…” Lucien watched with horror, unable to do anything, as his brother bent and licked a long stripe up Elain’s back. Her shriek sparked something inside of Lucien and he threw himself at Connal, taking his brother to the floor.

It was a desperate scramble but, at some point, Lucien was able to bring his knee up into Connal’s face, and his brother went still on the rug. Standing quickly, Lucien snarled, seeing Tallan still holding Elain pinned to the bed. As he watched, Tallan seized a handful of Elain’s honey-brown hair and yanked her back, pulling her to her feet, and holding her in front of himself as he moved back.

“You wont get away with this.” Lucien said, “What were you going to do? Murder me in bed and expect everything to go on as normal?”

“You’re not here as Emissary.” Tallan said, “Rhysand couldn’t do shit.”

“My family can.” Elain said softly, her hands tugging at his, trying to remove it from her hand. “Nesta could kill you.”

“Unlikely.” Tallan replied, “But I’d like to grapple with her to test that theory…” One of his hands slid down Elain’s body and Lucien saw her cringe away from him. He took a step toward the bed, his eyes never leaving Tallan now. 

“Let Elain go, or I’ll kill you.”

“You’ve rather got it backward. You’re not leaving this room breathing… or, I’m really going to hurt her and I’ll make you watch.”

Swallowing, Lucien forced himself to keep breathing. He felt the anger rising within him, felt himself growing hot with it. Before he knew what to do with it, however, he exploded. Unsure entirely what had happened, all he had noticed was the bright fiery light and the heat, and he found himself sitting on the bed what must have been moments later.  
Elain’s hands grabbed Lucien’s shoulders, and he looked up at her, feeling slightly dazed. “Lucien?” her voice was concerned, and he blinked. “Are you okay?”

“Yes…” he murmured, everything coming into focus when Elain pressed a kiss to his forehead. Carefully, he lifted a hand to her waist, his eyes now moving back and forth across her face as he looked her over. “Are you?”

“Yes.”

“Did he hurt you?”

“Nothing a hot bath and a massage from my mate wont cure…” Her lips brushed his cheek then, and Lucien noticed there were others moving around them. 

Tamlin was suddenly there, telling Lucien that he needed to get dressed, and Lucien go to his feet without thinking. He quickly pulled on the clothing that had been handed to him, and then he noticed that both of his brothers were gone. He knew they had been taken away by Eris’ men, and he wondered where they would be taken, and part of him hoped it was the same cell he had been kept in mere days before. 

When Elain had pulled a day dress on, Lucien moved closer, encircling her with his arms and enjoying the moment she leaned back into him. “We have to speak with Eris.” She told him, “He wants to know what happened… he wants to know it all.”

“I’d wager he knows already.” Lucien murmured, “Maybe less detailed…”

“Just tell me we can go in the morning.”

“As you wish, Petal.” He smiled at her, running his own fingers down her arms to her wrists. “We can be long gone by breakfast, even if the others choose to stay…”

“Let’s get through this, though.” She murmured, stepping aside so that he could inspect himself in the long mirror before it had been taken.

“Glad you think so.”

Elain took his hand then, and Lucien walked with her out into the hallway where they met Nesta who looked beyond livid. He did not dare to speak to her, not yet.


	83. Chapter Eighty-Three

**Chapter 83**

As Eris threw himself onto his throne, Elain was certain she saw him stifle a yawn. “Explain.” The redheaded High Lord demanded, and several people began speaking at once. Irritation crossed Eris’ features and he ran a long hand over his face, holding up a hand again. “Cauldron help me.” He muttered, before pointing at Lucien. “You.”

“Uh…” Elain felt Lucien trying to keep his calm tone as he began to speak. “I don’t know how they got in… the first I was aware of them was when a knife was pressed to my throat…” Eris raised an eyebrow and gestured for him to keep speaking, and Elain turned her gaze on Lucien. “Tallan had Elain pinned, and I tried to make them let her go. They wanted to pay me back for Tam and I killing our brothers… They came to kill me.”

“And then?” Eris asked mildly.

Lucien rolled his shoulders, and Elain kept her eyes on him. “I got around Connal…” he said, lifting a hand to rub at the back of his neck, “But Tallan still had Elain and I didn’t know what to do… I… don’t know … I don’t know what I did.”

Shifting her gaze back to Eris, Elain watched him tilt his head, his amber eyes narrowed as he looked at Lucien. “What do you remember?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien muttered, “I got angry… hot… panicked… and then I was sitting on the bed and there were others around.”

“Ah.” Eris’ amber eyes flicked to Elain. “Now you.”

Elain glanced at Lucien who took her hand, holding it carefully in his large warm one. “I don’t know how they got in, either.” She said softly, “I was asleep when Tallan pulled me from the bed.” She kept her eyes on Lucien. “He held me down while they held a knife to Lucien and woke him up. They wanted to kill him. They… they were going to kill him.”

“And yet…” Eris said softly, “That is not what happened…”

“Tallan taunted him.” Elain said, her eyes flicking from Lucien to Eris, “He… touched… me… And Lucien got free.” Elain looked back to Lucien once again. “He got hot… hotter than the fire beside me… I could feel it across the room… and he started to glow…” Lucien squeezed her hand, and Elain met his russet and gold eyes as he stared at her. “Then it all exploded… and Tallan was no longer holding me; he was screaming… and his skin was…” She shook her head, “I just got away from him as quickly as I could… and then the others came…”

“Did I hurt you?” Lucien asked, his metallic eye whirring as he looked her over. Elain shook her head and they both looked back to Eris who made another gesture at a pair of faeries standing by the door.

*

The two faeries by the door exited the room, at Eris’ command, and then returned several moments later, bringing Tallan and Connal with them. Lucien watched as his brothers were brought to kneel before Eris, close to where his stood with Elain. Shifting so that he stood between them and his mate, Lucien stared at Tallan. His brother’s skin was nearly as red as his hair, blisters evident on most of the flesh that was visible. He had evidently been severely burned. The pain on Tallan’s face was as blatant as his anger, and Lucien felt a small sliver of satisfaction. The bastard deserved it after what he had done to Elain, what he had intended to do. 

“You entered Lucien’s room with the intent to kill him.” Eris accused, and Tallan and Connal looked up at their brother silently. “Do you deny this?”

“No.” Connal muttered. 

His expression hardening further, Eris snarled the next words. “You intended to murder a guest of my house under my nose…?”

“He deserved it.” Tallan snapped, “You know what he did!”

“Shut up!” Eris got to his feet. “You will not disrespect me any further. I am your High Lord. Do you have anything to say for yourselves before I metre judgement?”

Lucien raised an eyebrow when Tallan’s amber eyes flicked toward him. “Watch yourself, little brother.” He said, “We won’t ever forget.”

“If you listen to me closely,” Lucien replied, “you can hear me not caring…” he felt Elain’s hand tighten on his, and he returned his attention to Eris who was now pacing back and forth across the dais.

“You’re both to be ostracised.” Eris eventually said, turning his eyes on their brothers, kneeling on the floor. “You are no longer welcome in the Autumn Court. You are no longer family, and you maintain no ties to this house. If you are caught trying to enter my lands, you will be put to death.” Lucien caught the quick glance Eris cast at their mother standing nearby. “Do you understand?” he asked them. Neither one responded and Eris waved his hand at them. “Go now. You have until sunup to be out of my lands.”

They moved as one, both brothers getting to their feet and fleeing the room without so much as a glance backwards, and Lucien’s eyes followed Eris as he returned to sit in his throne. No more brothers, nobody else in line for the throne. There was nobody who would directly benefit from murdering Eris while he slept. Lucien wondered if Eris hadn’t planned this whole thing. He had eliminated every threat to his reign in a single day.

“You should have just killed them.” This was Nesta, and Lucien turned his head to glance at Elain's sister who was standing not far behind them.

“Oh,” Eris replied, crossing one leg over the other as he gave Nesta a pleased look, “If they return, I will.”

“Yet at the moment you have three exiled brothers who would probably love nothing more than to see you dead. They’re still going to be out there, waiting for their opportunity.”

“I don’t think they will.” Eris grinned, “They know if they so much as slip a toenail into my lands, they will be executed. They will not test me on this.” Lucien watched the approving way that Eris’ eyes moved over Nesta before his brother gave her another wide smile. “You are all welcome to stay, of course, I understand completely if you wish to leave in the morning.”  
Lucien skid closer to Elain, slipping his arm around her shoulders. “May we return to our rooms?” 

Dragging his gaze from Nesta, Eris met Lucien’s eyes and nodded. “Yes.”

Lucien turned Elain to the door, and they swiftly returned to their room. He didn’t so much as spare a glance for anyone else; they could wait for morning. When they got into their room, Lucien made sure to lock the door, and then drag the orange couch in front of it. Nobody would be getting in without him knowing about it this time and, by the time he had turned around, Elain had wandered into the bathroom. 

“I want a bath.” She told him, and the unbidden image of Tallan licking her back flashed before Lucien’s eyes. It was no wonder she wanted to clean herself. He followed her quickly, entering the bathroom as she began to fill the bathtub with steaming water. 

“Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?” he asked, “I… had no control over what happened. I don’t even know what it was…”

“It didn’t touch me.” She replied, “I didn’t feel a thing. It was just hot, and then Tallan was screaming and he let me go.” 

“Alright…” Lucien lifted his hands, unable to help himself, stroking the back of her neck as she undid her dress. He thought again about Tallan licking her, and a territorial flood of heat swept through him. Lucien wrapped his arms around her waist, drawing her back against himself and then releasing her instantly at her hiss of pain. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” She turned to face him, “Just a little sore…”

Lucien had been about to ask her what hurt when she dropped her dress, allowing it to pool on the floor at her feet, and he forgot any of the words he had been about to utter. Instead, he watched her step into the tub and sink down into the hot water. After a moment, he managed to pull himself together enough to move toward the tub, sitting on the edge as he watched her. “How’s it feel?” he asked, picking up a soft sponge and sipping it into the water. 

“Warm and delicious.” She murmured, turning so that he could reach her back. Lucien smiled and began rubbing the sponge over her, paying particular attention to the place he remembered Tallan licking her. When she leaned further forward so that he could reach lower, Lucien’s breath caught at the sight of a large purple and green bruise already spreading across her lower back where Tallan’s knee had been.

“Petal….” He murmured, “…are you alright?”

Elain looked over her shoulder, one of her hands coming back to touch the bruise gingerly and she flinched. “Yeah…” Lucien began moving the sponge over her slowly again, his other hand on her back, his touch featherlight. Closing his eyes, he focused on that bruise, on making it disappear, taking that pain from her. Smooth, pale skin, met his eyes when he opened them and Elain’s dark eyes met his over her shoulder. “Thank you…”

“You’re welcome, Petal.”

She smiled at him and then stood up, wrapping a towel around herself. “The sun is coming up.” She said softly, glancing toward the window. “We should dress and get out of here…”

Lucien nodded, more than ready to get her out of the Autumn Court, and somewhere they would be able to relax more completely.


	84. Chapter Eighty-Four

**Chapter 84**

His smother smiled at him, reaching a hand out to hold his, and Lucien felt a flush of affection wash over him. He wrapped his other arm around her shoulders and pulled her into a gentle hug, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I will come and see you.” He told her when she hugged him tightly, her own arms around him.

“See that you do.”

“Of course.” Lucien brushed her long red hair back over her shoulder, his eyes moving over her quickly. Although he thought he knew, Lucien had a question he wanted to ask her all the same. They were leaving within minutes, though, and his was the last chance he would have. When her fingers moved up his arm, he bit his lip. “It… what I did… it was my father’s power, wasn’t it?”

Ashk nodded, her hand still moving up and down his arm before sliding down to take his hand in hers again. “I have seen him do that before.” She said softly, “When he saved me from Hybern… I saw him do that to some of Hybern’s men. They burned and their skin blistered… just like you did to Tallan to protect Elain.”

“I’ve used his power before to protect Elain.” Lucien told her, “When Hybern had her turned.” He began, “I broke the spell he’d used to restrain me so that I could get to her.”

His mother smiled at him. “Of course.” She told him softly, “She’s your mate. Your great desperation to protect her would bring that out in you. Remember, though, it’s not just his power. It’s yours, too.”

Nodding, Lucien squeezed her hand. “Are you okay?” he asked her, “With Malak, and now Tallan and Connal gone?”

“Ah…” She tilted her head, her eyes sliding away for a moment, “They made their choices, and now this is the way it must be.”

“But you’ll miss them?”

“I’ll miss knowing they are safe and seeing them each day…”

“Do you know where they will have gone?”

“No.”

Lucien didn’t bother asking her if she thought if Eris really would kill them if they dared to return; he knew that he would.

“Lucien?” Feyre’s voice called to him a moment before she appeared with Rhys beside her. “We’re ready to go. Are you?”

“Yes.” He looked from his friend to his mother, and smiled again. Moving forward, he pulled her into a gentle hug once again, loving the feel of her squeezing him in return.

“Once a month.” Ashk said after a moment, when she released him. “I want to see you at least once a month. Do you think you can manage that?”

“I think I can.” Lucien smiled, pressing a kiss to her cheek before moving back. His mother’s eyes moved past him and Lucien turned to see that Elain and Nesta had joined Feyre and Rhys and they were all watching him. Elain came closer, and Lucien reached out to take her hand. She smiled at him before her dark eyes slid to Ashk. 

“You are also welcome to visit.” His mother said to Elain who smile more widely and nodded hear head, golden-brown hair bouncing slightly with the movement. 

“Thank you, I’d like that.”

*

Her garden had survived her absence, but Elain could see the impact the neglect had had upon her flowers. As soon as they had returned, she had hurried out to back to see what she would need to do, although it seemed that mostly she would just need to remove some of the choking weeds to give her flowers room to flourish.

“Not a garden emergency?” Azriel’s voice asked, and Elain turned to find him sitting on the low stone bench in the shadows. “Does it pass your inspection?”

“It’s agreeable…” Elain murmured, hands smoothing her dress down in order to distract herself from wanting to get into the garden and begin working right away. 

“Good.” He got to his feet, “How long are you back for?”

“Just the night, I think.”

“Ahh.”Azriel nodded and then inclined his head toward the door. “I’ll head inside and let you sort this out.”

“Okay.” Before Azriel could go anywhere however, Nesta came outside, Cassian following her closely. 

“I thought you would have come straight out here.” Her sister said, “You can’t help yourself.”

“Well, we’re leaving again in the morning… I need to get some work done.”

“You don’t have to go.” Nesta said flatly, “You could stay…”

“No, Nes.” Elain said, sinking down beside the closest garden bed. “I want to see the courts… and I’m not leaving Lucien.”

“After what just happened…” Nesta said softly, “Maybe it’s not safe.”

“I’m safer with Lucien than anywhere else.” Elain replied, pulling several weeds from the soft earth.

“What just happened?” Cassian asked, his eyes shifting over Nesta, “Did you kill someone at the Autumn Court?”

“Nearly.” Nesta muttered, and Elain tilted her head. 

“I think Eris would have enjoyed that.” 

“Probably.” Her sister agreed.

Elain shifted closed to the garden bed, creating a pile of discarded weeds beside her. The sun was high overhead by now, casting dark shadows over the small yard from the nearby trees. She would have a couple hours out here to get the most pressing work done before she would, no doubt, be called inside to spend a small amount of time with the rest of them. Figuring that she should probably do that to thank her sisters and Rhys for coming all the way to the Autumn Court to help her when she had sent that letter to them informing them of what had happened to Lucien. 

Cassian was still questioning Nesta, and Elain grinned as she listened. “Who did you nearly kill?”

“A couple of Lucien’s awful brothers.”

“Makes sense.” Cassian chuckled, “They have been pains in everyone’s arses for centuries.”

“Well, now they’ve been kicked out, and Eris has said he will kill them if they return to the Autumn Court.”

“Interesting...” Cassian muttered, and Elain did not miss his eyes shifting to Azriel.

“Do you know where they would go?” she asked, and Azriel looked at her. 

“Why would you want to know that?”

“They want to kill Lucien.” She said, “Knowing where they went would be useful.”

“That information could be… attained.” Azriel said gently. Elain just nodded, returning her attention to the garden from which she was still pulling weeds. Cassian broke the silence that followed by shifting closer to Nesta once again. 

“Tell me more about how you nearly killed those cocky bastards…” he said, and the laughter was evident in his voice. 

“She told Tallan she would rip his arms off and beat him to death with them.” Elain said, not taking her eyes off of her work. Cassian cackled.

“Oh… I would have paid good money to see that.” He said, and Nesta gave a small laugh of her own, stunning Elain enough to turn around and stare at her. 

“It was amusing in my own mind.” Her older sister said, grinning at Cassian.

“It is a great image.” He told her, and Elain just watched the two of them stare at one other in silence for a few moments. Looking back to her garden, she wondered how much longer it would be before Nesta gave in to what she was so clearly beginning to acknowledge being between herself and the Illyrian. She hoped it was soon, but she also hoped that she was here for it, and not exploring some other court when it happened. With that thought, Elain understood a little more why Nesta had been hurt to not have known how her own relationship with Lucien had progressed as she had not been present when it had changed.

Deciding that she would make the time to speak to Nesta about it all before they left the next day, Elain settled into her work, ignoring the heart of the day, in order to get as much done while she had the time and before she was ultimately called away to attend to something else.


	85. Chapter Eighty-Five

**Chapter 85**

They had spent the afternoon and the evening talking with the others, and sitting around the dinner table for hours as wine was poured and the group joked and teased one another. Lucien knew that what he was seeing was exactly why Feyre had preferred the Night Court to Spring, and why she had chosen to leave, and he could see that Elain had been well and truly accepted into that group, and that they considered her one of them. He knew that he was welcome, and that his presence among their group was accepted, but they did not see him as one of their own, and he wondered if they ever would. Throughout dinner, Lucien had participated in conversations, and watched the interplay among the group. He had found it more difficult than he had anticipated to get used to sharing Elain with the others again, and his eyes had followed her for most of the evening. The only way he had really managed to control himself was by repeating in his mind over and over again that he would have her all to himself when they went upstairs for bed. He knew that he would be the one who got to lay with her, hold her, and stroke her hair, and that he wouldn’t have to share her or let anyone else near her until they got the next morning for breakfast. Knowing that she was to be all his, he was able to remain in his chair, keep his hands to himself, and act as if he wasn’t itching to wrap her in his arms and snarl at anybody else who so much as glanced her way.

He had asked Feyre, in a low tone, if she might provide them with one of her shields to prevent anybody listening in to their room, and he had tried to look as innocent as possible when she raised an eyebrow at him. It wasn’t as if Lucien intended to jump Elain the moment they were alone, but rather the idea of nobody being able to listen to them speak or anything else made him feel as if he could have her even more to himself, and he just wanted to be as alone with her as he possibly could be. 

When they had entered the bedroom, Elain had gone for a bath, and Lucien had set about unpacking what they would need for the night and for the next morning. They were meant to be heading for The Summer Court, so he was sure to choose clothing that would be best suited to that hot climate. He had just been setting the book he had been reading to her on the bed when Elain emerged from the bathroom in a silken nightgown, and he had hurried into the bathroom to have his own bath.

By the time he emerged, Elain had braided her golden-brown hair up onto her head, and was pulling the bed covers back. She gave him a warm smile and he crossed the room swiftly to join her. Elain picked up the book her had put on the bed and slid between the sheets, Lucien doing the same with a smile as she moved to settle against him. He took the book from her hands and opened it to the place he had marked. As Elain settled her head against his shoulder, Lucien began to read, calming himself as he relaxed at finally getting to have her in his arms, against himself, with nobody else wanting her attention. _Mate. Mate._

“I’m glad,” he told her, setting the book aside, “that this time when I awake, I can be sure you’ll still be beside me…” It had seemed like so long ago that he had awoken in the dark, a knife to his throat and Elain held out of reach, but it had only been early that morning. She nodded her head, cheek against his chest. 

“Of course I will be.” She murmured. 

“I… would have done anything.” Lucien lifted one of his hands to run his fingers across her shoulder. “Anything to get you out of that situation.”

“I thought you were going to die.” Elain said softly, one of her own hands sliding across his stomach and up his chest. “I knew that they had come to kill you, and that you knew that… but I thought it was actually going to happen.” She turned her head to look up at him and Lucien met her wide brown eyes, “He had me held so tightly that I couldn’t move at all, and I couldn’t do anything and Connal had that knife to you…”

Lucien kissed the tip of her nose. “They thought they were going to use you to hurt me.” He said softly, and Elain’s hand slid across his shoulder. She cuddled into him, one of her legs sliding across his as she settled more comfortably, and he could feel her breath against his neck.

“If they had gotten what they had wanted…” her voice was barely more than a whisper and Lucien shook his head, his hand coming to rest at her waist. “I wouldn’t have been able to handle it. You’re my mate…” his heart quickened at the words, and her lips pressed gently to the side of his throat, “I need you.” She settled her cheek against him once more, “I need to be able to curl up with you like this every night. Forever.”

“Of course, Petal.” He replied, “I am only too happy to be your personal pillow for the rest of eternity.” He smiled when he felt her give a soft laugh, and his hand slid from her waist, down over her hip, to her backside. She laughed again, her hand tightening on his shoulder.

“Lucien…” she murmured, and he could hear a hint of hesitation in her voice.

“Yes?”

“I want to… try… something.”

“Oh?” he glanced down at her, curious. 

“I… I’m not… I mean, I… it’s… I’ve read about it, well, it’s been in books I’ve read… and…” He could feel her uncertainty now, and he turned his head a little more to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“Petal, you can try anything you like.”

Elain was still for several moments, and Lucien had just begun to wonder if she had fallen asleep, but then she lifted her head, meeting his eyes as she pushed herself up, and then she had slid over until she was atop him. Lucien held her gaze, sure that his heart had stopped beating altogether as he struggled to draw a proper breath. “Is this okay?”

Lucien nodded, his hand sliding up her thigh. “Absolutely.”

He wasn’t entirely certain he knew what she wanted until she pulled her night dress up and over her head and dropped it down beside the bed, and he could do nothing but watch as she lifted herself on to her knees so that she could begin undoing his pants. When she had them loose, Lucien was able to gather himself enough to slip them off. He was already hard, and he drew a quick hiss of a breath when Elain wrapped one of her gentle hands around him. She looked up at him then, dark eyes questioning, and then she was adjusting herself over him once more.

“Is this right?” she asked, “Do I just…”

“Yeah…ah… slowly…” Lucien could barely get the words out when she’d settled herself in the right position, and both of her hands came to brace against his chest as she carefully sank down onto him. Lucien’s eyes were locked on Elain’s face, watching her bite her lower lip as she took him inside of her. She was still then, her hands pressed to his chest, and her breath coming quickly. He lifted a hand of his own to her cheek, trying to be reassuring and let her know that let her know that everything was okay, and that they could wait until she was ready. Her dark eyes met his again and Lucien gave her a small smile.

They didn’t speak. Elain just held his gaze as she slowly, cautiously, shifted her hips, a light frown appearing between her eyes as she did so. She repeated the movement, and her lips parted slightly as she drew a small breath. She did it again, and Lucien’s hands went to her hips as he bit back a soft groan. Gently, he guided her hips, showing her how to move more smoothly, and at the correct angle and, before long, she was doing it on her own, leaning forward to brace herself more heavily against his chest as she did so.

Lucien forced himself to remain silent, listening to Elain’s gasping breath every time she moved on him. He could see that her face was flushed, and he could see that blush working its way down her throat and to her chest. He was careful not to make a sound, enjoying that all he could hear was her gasping breath with each movement, the rhythmic creaking of the old bedframe, and the occasional whimper that fell from her lips when her eyes closed and she leaned further into him, trying to balance herself. 

Taking her hands in his, Lucien linked their fingers together, letting her use his grip on her to further her balance, and to allow her to sit up slightly, making her movement over him easier. Looking up at her, he almost found it hard to believe that this was his life. That this wasn’t something that was happening to someone else. It was still surprising to him that a creature as beautiful and sweet as Elain could be his mate, could actually want him. His eyes moved over her and another wave of hot desire flushed through him. He tried to resist rolling them until she was beneath him, but then she had reached over him to grab hold of the headboard, using it to give herself more leverage, more power behind her movements, and Lucien nearly lost it. 

Both of his hands went to her hips and he began pulling her to meet him as his hips lifted to push into her. Elain gasped and he heard her adjust her grip on the headboard before her rhythm changed and she began rotating her hips in a new way. Groaning, Lucien’s eyes closed and he thrust up into her again. Elain was whimpering with every move she made now, her breath nothing but shallow gasps, and Lucien trailed his fingers slowly over her hot skin, feeling her tighten around him. He knew that it was coming, would have known even if he hadn’t have been able to feel her clearly down the bond. He felt her shudder a moment before she grabbed at his shoulder, letting out a loud cry, her movement over him stuttering before her followed her with a choked cry of his own. Elain stilled, still leaning over him, panting, and he slid a hand up her hot back. She let go of the headboard then, her other hand sliding down to his chest as she lowered herself to lay flush against him.

“Was that like it was in you books?” he murmured, unable to help a smirk. Elain let out a breathy laugh against his skin.

“Better…”

“I’m glad you think so.” He ran a hand up and down her back again, breathing slowly and evenly, trying to get his heartbeat back under control. He was still inside of her, and he would happily remain there all night if he could. She made no attempt to move, so he just continued to stroke her. “Good thing I asked Feyre to shield the room…”

Elain laughed again, turning her head to press a kiss to his throat. He shuddered slightly. “Good thinking.” She murmured, “We might still need it yet.”


	86. Chapter Eighty-Six

**Chapter 86**

Adriata was like nothing Elain had ever seen before. The city wound up around the mountain, the red roofs of every building shining bright in the glorious sunshine, and Elain’s eyes followed the gulls as they swirled overhead, crying out their apparent enjoyment of the day. The harbour below was full of that many ships she lost count after a quick glance, and she didn’t think she’d ever felt a breeze as warm as the one pulling strands of her hair from her loose braid.  
The soft chuckle from Lucien beside her made Elain turn her eyes on him and he smiled widely. “Is this what you imagined?”

“I didn’t know what to imagine, really.” She replied, shifting closer to Lucien when several faeries in guard uniforms came their way. Lucien took her hand, and she felt herself relax a little. 

“Tarquin’s men.” He gave her a wink and she noticed that he was still smiling.

“You like him?”

“I do.” 

“Why?” It wasn’t as if she had any opinion the other way, she didn’t’ really know anything about Tarquin, but she was interested in what would make Lucien like the High Lord.

“Well… he’s… young…” Lucien mused, “and… I like his… ideals. He wants a world in which the High Fae and Lesser Fae work side by side…”

Elain thought of Jesminda, and immediately understood Lucien’s approval of Tarquin’s ideal. Of course he would agree with that. In a world in which Lesser Fae were valued alongside High Fae she wouldn’t have been put to death because he had loved her. “I see.” She murmured.

She saw Lucien cast a glance at her before they were swept up in the movement of the guards taking them up into the city and, before too long, Elain found herself looking up at the High Lord of the Sumemr Court. Tarquin was handsome, and she found her eyes following him around the room as he moved. He greeted them amicably, and she nodded and smiled politely when he told her that she had free reign of his court, able to wander and choose which flowers she would like to include in her book, just as every other High Lord so far had promised.

Allowed to have free reign for the rest of the afternoon, Elain had begun to wander. She had found herself down on a small beach, while Lucien had disappeared with Tarquin to have their conversations about the courts and the kinds of things Rhys was interested in for his reports. Wandering along the sand, Elain collected shells and other interesting things she found. It would be nice, she thought, to explore a place like this with Lucien, when they had the time and space, and no demands upon their time. 

Stopping by the water, Elain allowed her gaze to move across the horizon. If she were to walk into the ocean and just swim, where would she end up? Elain knew that she wasn’t the greatest swimmer, she had never had cause to learn, but she still wondered. Who would she be if she just disappeared into the ocean and never resurfaced. Lucien would miss her, and she would miss him. She knew this.

Pulling her dress up to her knees, Elain tucked her skirts around her as she strode into the shallow waves. The water was cool against her skin, and she was surprised at how powerful the waves were against her. She loved the feel of this, the smell of it, and she wondered if there were some kind of ocean flower she might include in her book. Making a mental note to ask Tarquin, Elain decided to just enjoy the water for as long as she could.

It was later that afternoon, when Lucien found her. By this point, Elain was wandering the hills along the edge of the city, her shoes off and held loosely in her hand as she tried to take as much of the landscape in as she could. 

“Do you like it here?” he asked, striding toward her, his shirt open in the heat and his usual embroidered jacket tucked over his arm. Elain nodded, smiling at him as he drew nearer. 

“It is so warm and pleasant. I can’t imagine a day one wakes up and decided to put off the day’s chores for tomorrow because the weather is not favourable.”

“The enemy of procrastination.” Lucien nodded his understanding, “I agree…”

“How do faeries here get anything done?” She asked, smiling up at him when he reached her. Lucien pressed a kiss to her forehead and Elain felt her heart skip a beat.

“Well, I am guessing most of them have actual jobs to do.” He told her, “Unlike us… we are free to wander and explore at our pleasure.”

“I suppose that is true…”

“Which do you prefer?” he asked as they began to walk, side by side, along the shore. “Summer or Winter?”

“That’s a bit unfair.” She replied, smiling nonetheless. “But… I would have to say that I prefer the beauty of Winter.”

“I like that you’re wearing rather less bulky clothing here.” He grinned and Elain pushed at him. Lucien made a surprised sound as he stumbled into a wave sliding across wet sand and he looked at her in surprise. “Have you sketched any flowers for the Summer court yet?” he asked her, sliding an arm around her shoulders and Elain shook her head. 

“I was planning to ask Tarquin if there are any ocean flowers that he thought I should draw, or any that are his favourites. Every other High Lord has suggested a favourite, and I think that it has become a rather important part of what I have for each court. Do you think that he has a favourite?” 

“I would say that he does.”

“Do you think everyone does?” Elain chewed her lip, wondering, for the first time, if maybe she had been expecting something from people that they perhaps hadn’t always considered. It had seemed obvious to her that everyone would have an opinion, or a favourite. But, maybe they didn’t.

“I… I guess not.” Lucien replied, hesitantly. 

“…what’s yours?” she asked him, coming to a stop on the sand, and Lucien turned to face her.

“My favourite flower?” he asked, a light frown appearing on his face, and Elain nodded, her eyes trained on him.

Gold and Russet eyes met hers for a moment and he smiled, “I really like Dahlias, actually.” He said softly and Elain smiled at him.

“I have those…” she flipped through her book until she found the flowers she had drawn when in the Autumn Court, and she passed the book to him. Lucien’s metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked at the book, and she watched as his lips quirked in a smile.

“You’ve gotten really good, haven’t you?” he asked, glancing at her, before looking back to the book.

“That was so long ago…”

“You’re still good.” He smiled at her, “The Dahlias look wonderful.” He bit his lip before continuing, “Did you see them in all the different colours?”

“I saw a few.”

“Do you think you might be able to grow them in your garden?”

“If I had come seeds…” She tilted her head, “I could try.”

“My mother would probably get you some if asked…”

Elain wrapped an arm around Lucien’s waist, smiling up at him. “If you want a Dahlia garden, I’ll grow you one.” She laughed as he bent to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“Perfect mate.” He murmured.


	87. Chapter Eighty-Seven

**Chapter 87**

Dinner in the Summer Court was a small affair, with only Tarquin, on a low balcony overlooking the harbour as the sun set. Elain was seated beside Lucien, watching with awe and adoration as the crimson sunset just about set her mate’s hair alight. She had always thought that she favoured pretty pastel colours, but there was nothing pastel about Lucien, and she had never seen anything more captivating. His red hair appeared to glow like molten metal and it took a good deal of her self-control to keep herself from lifting a hand to touch it.

“See something you like, Petal?” he asked, his eyes still on his own plate as he speared a piece of fish on his fork. 

“Very much.”

He looked up at her then, a quick flash of russet and golden eyes, and his smile with mischievous.

“A year ago, Lucien,” Tarquin began from where he sat across from Lucien, “this is not where I would have expected to find you…”

Elain felt the slight twinge of defensiveness from Lucien, but he smiled nonetheless. “Where is that?” He asked, his tone light, “In your Court?”

Tarquin smiled back. “Well, yes.” He agreed, “I would have through t you would still be with Tamlin, yet you are now the Emissary to the Night Court… working for Rhysand… and with a mate of your own…”

Lucien’s hand settled possessively on Elain’s knee under the table and she glanced at him as he looked at the High Lord. “Well, you’re not the only one who thought I’d never have a mate.”

Elain frowned, one of her own hands trailing up the back of Lucien’s chair to his back. She rubbed him gently, wondering how it must have felt to have lived for centuries, knowing that mates existed and figuring that he would never have one. Especially after having lost Jesminda.

Tarquin gave a soft chuckle, however. “Who would have thought I would be High Lord?”

“Fair.” Lucien agreed, a small smile playing on his lips. Elain relaxed slightly. “From Prince of another city to High Lord of the Summer Court must have been a surprise.”

“Even worse when Amarantha called us all to her Under the Mountain.”

“None of us had a good time Under the Mountain.” Lucien replied, and Elain remembered the vision she had once had of Amarantha forcing Tamlin to whip Lucien in punishment for helping Feyre with her first trial. 

“She did enjoy playing with you…” Tarquin mused, “The second trial must have been…” the High Lord broke off and Elain saw Lucien frown. 

“It won’t be forgotten quickly…”

Trying to remember what Feyre had told her of the second trial, Elain watched Lucien. Her sister had told her she had to solve a riddle that she hadn’t been able to read, and that Rhys had helped her. If she had have failed, she and Lucien would have been crushed…

As if sensing her confusion, Lucien turned his head toward her. The second his gaze met hers, Elain saw what he had seen. 

Lucien had been shackled to the ground, out of reach of Feyre. She felt his absolute terror and panic as Feyre had weighed her decision and death had descended steadily toward them.  
Elain felt sick. The fact that Feyre hadn’t been taught to read could have meant the loss of her mate and her sister. She might not have ever met Lucien, and she never would have known what had happened to Feyre. She would likely have married Graysen, been under his control. Even if Lucien hadn’t have died, and Amarantha had continued to torture him, he would have likely gone on thinking he would never have had a mate. 

“Elain…?” Lucien’s hand rubbed at her knee. 

Blinking, she realised that tears blurred her vision. “Sorry…” she murmured, “That second trial…”

“Did you see it?” he asked softly and she blinked the tears away until she could see clearly. 

“Just a flash or two…” Lucien’s hand slid into Elain’s and she met his eyes for a moment.

“I’m sorry if I said something to upset you, Lady.” Tarquin’s voice was gentle, and Elain shook her head. 

“Not at all.”

He looked at her doubtfully, and Elain could see the wariness in his crystal blue eyes. “Let us move on to more pleasant topics, then.” He replied, smiling after a moment and turning those bright eyes on Lucien once more. “Do you believe Rhys would work with us in regard to the Lesser Fae?”

“I do.” Lucien said simply. “His High Lady, as well.”

Tarquin raised an eyebrow and bowed his head slightly in acknowledgement. “Ah, of course.” The High Lord smiled, “And you?” he asked, “You would as well?”

“Anything I can.” Lucien assured him, moving things around his plate carefully. “I have always wanted the world of which you speak.”

“Yes…” Tarquin said slowly, his eyes still on Lucien, “I imagine that is so…” 

Elain wondered just how widespread the story of Lucien and Jesminda was throughout Prythian. Swallowing the unexpected jealousy that flared within her, she looked back to her own plate as she tried to breathe slowly and force herself to let it go. Lucien’s hand tightened on hers and she felt even worse when she caught the confused look he gave her.

None of this exchange had been lost on Tarquin, apparently. “What is it like to be mated?” he asked, “How does it feel?”

Lucien lifted a hand, running it slowly over his face. “Obsessive…” he said, and Elain raised an eyebrow. “It is all I can think about. Elain… is… always at the forefront of my mind.” He paused for a moment before continuing, “It’s even more so when we are apart…”

“Obsessive?” she asked and Lucien turned to look at her. 

“How would you describe it?”

“…Any way that doesn’t sound negative.” She said flatly, “Powerful, all encompassing, comforting…” 

“I didn’t mean it to sound negative…” his hand squeezed hers again, “Not at all…”

Glancing up when the High Lord got to his feet, Elain watched as he picked up his wineglass and took a sip. “You have the evening to yourselves.” He said, blue eyes sliding from Lucien to Elain and then back again. “Please enjoy the view. It is my favourite in all of Adriata.” He strode quickly away and Elain stared after him before looking back to Lucien.

“Did we scare him away?”

“I think so.”

She pushed away from the table herself and got to her own feet, making her way to the balcony wall so that she could look out at the harbour. A moment later, she felt Lucien come up behind her, his arms snaking slowly around her waist as he pressed himself to her. “Lucien…”

“I’m sorry for my poor word choice.”

“It’s fine.” She murmured, taking a slow breath when she felt him press a kiss to the back of her shoulder.

“There was something wrong before that…”

“It’s nothing.”

“Tell me…”

“I don’t want to.” She felt him flinch at those words, and she sought to explain further. “It’s stupid and unfair.”

“I want to know.” His arms tightened around her waist, “Share with me…”

“If Jesminda was never killed…” she breathed, not able to make her voice any stronger, “What would you have chosen to do?” She turned to look at him in the orange sunset, “Would you be with me or with her?”

Lucien stared at her. “Elain…”

She blinked back tears, “You loved her…”

“I love you. You’re my mate…”

“I know that…”

“This… isn’t something you should be worried about…”

“I can’t help it.” She murmured, “You loved her. You never would have hurt her…”

“Petal, we likely wouldn’t have met…” he said gently. Elain sniffed. He would have probably been waiting for the mating bond to snap into place with Jesminda, not realising that it wasn’t going to happen.

“You would have probably still been in Autumn. I would still have been the High Lady of the Night Court’s sister. We would have met at one point.” She looked at him, frowning. “It still would have happened.” She bit her lip. “You thought she was your mate…”

“I did.” He sighed, “But if I still would have had her… and then met you, and the bond snapped into place and I realised you were my mate…” Elain tried not to hold her breath, but couldn’t help it. “I don’t know, love.” He said, “I wouldn’t have wanted to hurt her, you’re right… but… I can’t imagine fighting the bond.” She could see the hurt in his eyes as he tried to consider the scenario and she felt awful for asking him in the first place. Without pausing to think further, Elain threw her arms around his neck.

“I’m sorry…” she breathed, “I couldn’t help the jealousy. He knew about you and her. In that world he wants with High Fae and Lesser Fae alongside one another would have meant that she would have been okay. You still would have been able to be with her… she was your choice…”

“You are my mate.” He said firmly. “The mating bond is considered more sacred than any other relationship for a reason…” Lucien’s lips brushed Elain’s cheek and she shivered, “Nobody will ever be as close to me as you are. Nobody will have a connection stronger than what you and I have with one another…”

“Obsession…”

“That was a poor choice of words on my part.” He kissed her cheek again, and she felt his hands in her hair. “But I am obsessed with you.” He held her to himself more tightly, “I don’t consider that bad… It is completely passionate… a special kind of love…”

“I love you.” She breathed and his lips moved to her forehead.

“Either one of us could have rejected it.” He reminded her, “But we haven’t. We chose each other.”

Nodding, Elain felt something soften inside of her. She relaxed, leaning into his chest and wrapping her own arms around his waist. “It makes me sad that you thought you would never have a mate.”

“Look at me now.” He murmured into her ear, “I have the most stunning mate anyone could dream of…”

“You’ve changed just about everything I ever thought about myself and the world…”

“Oh?” Lucien leaned back enough to meet her eyes with his, russet and gold. “Like what?”

“Like…” Elain paused to consider, “… my favourite colour.”

“That has changed?”

“It used to be pale green…”

“What is it now?” his eyes moved over her face as he smiled at her. 

“Hmm…” Elain slid a hand up his arm to his shoulder, and then around to the back of his neck. Gently, she moved her hand to comb through his vibrant hair with her fingers, bringing what she held around for him to see. “This colour…”

She watched Lucien’s eyes take in the hair she held before they flicked to meet her gaze once again. Emotions flickered through his russet eye and Elain felt his hands tighten on her waist before he bent to kiss her, and she dropped his hair to wrap herself more tightly around him as he lifted her from her feet. When he held her like this, there was no room in her heart for any kind of jealousy as there was nobody in the world beside the two of them. Nobody and nothing else mattered, and she wondered if perhaps that was her own kind of obsession.


	88. Chapter Eighty-Eight

**Chapter 88**

“Did you sleep well?”

“I did, thank you.” Elain smiled at Tarquin as he walked steadily beside her. He had offered at breakfast to show her the sites and interesting things around Adriata while Lucien was busy doing something or other with Varian. She cast him a wary gaze, chewing her lip for a moment. “Sorry if Lucien and I made you feel awkward last night…”

“Oh, no…” he gave a dismissive wave of his hand, “I simply felt that an argument between mates is probably best done without an audience…”

“It wasn’t an argument.” She said softly, “Not really…” Tilting her head, Elain realised that she and Lucien hadn’t really had an argument; not yet.

“A disagreement, then.” Tarquin turned his crystal blue eyes on her. “You were unhappy, and I figured that you would more easily sort it out if I made myself scarce.”

“I see.”

“I take it that you did?”

“I guess so…”

“I apologise if I was the cause of whatever it was.”

“Oh, no.” Elain paused to take in the view from the balcony, “I…” she glanced at Tarquin before looking back to the view. “I couldn’t help being jealous of a lover long since gone.”

Tarquin leaned on his elbows against the low wall, his own eyes out on the view. “The lesser fae female Beron had executed?”

“Jesminda.” She watched Tarquin nod slowly. 

“I’ve known Lucien for a long time.” He told Elain, “Since before I was High Lord. He was here quite a bit as one of the sons of Autumn, and then later when he was the Emissary for the Spring Court…” Elain nodded, listening, “He has changed in that time.” Blue eyes flicked her way, “He was sad for such a long time… I figured it was for a number of reasons, Jesminda being just one… but… even before that horrible incident, I had never seen him as happy as he is now.” Tarquin gave her a soft smile, “There’s a light in him, a brightness… and I would wager that is down to you.”

“He’s still sad…” Elain murmured, although her heart had lightened at Tarquin’s words. “Every so often, I can see it in him. I can feel it…”

“He wants a home.”

“How do you know that?” Elain turned to face the High Lord more completely. 

“I’ve seen him lose his home, only to make a new one, and now he’s lost that as well…”

“Yes.” Elain nodded. Autumn and then Spring. She knew the truth behind Tarquin’s assessment. 

A cloud passed across the sun, and a chill fell over Elain as the wind blew a cooler gust of air past them. “That doesn’t change the fact that he’s happier now than I have ever known him to be.” Tarquin told her and Elain smiled. “Now, you were after flowers for your book?”

“Yes, I was hoping that you might have a favourite I could include. The other High Lords have all done so…”

“My favourite…” He paused for a moment, “is a little yellow flower that only grows in the city I was once the Prince of…” He smiled at her again. “I will have one brought to you.”

“That would be really nice.”

“If you are looking for where you might find some other nice options to include, you might look on the hills down the south side of the mountain. There are flowers and trees down there, and more than a few little paths that lead to secluded beaches and rockpools…” 

“Lucien did mention those.” She stood straight again, pushing her hair back over her shoulder. “He said we might take a walk down that way when he returns this afternoon."

“I’m sure that will be lovely. Did you talk out the disagreement yesterday?”

“We did.” Elain murmured, “I…” she didn’t know why she was telling Tarquin this, “I know that I was being silly.” She said, “I was being unfair…”

“I’m sure you weren’t.”

“I was… but I couldn’t help the jealousy.” She let out a sigh, “And I wanted to know if he would have picked me or Jesminda.”

“You are his mate, Elain.”

“I know that… but she was his first love. He chose her.” She sighed again, “He didn’t have a choice about me.”

“He does now.” He replied, “He could ignore it…”

“That’s what he said.” She told him “He said we both could…”

“He’s right…”

“You asked what it felt like,” she recalled, “Last night, you asked what it felt like to be mated…”

“You disagreed with Lucien’s assessment of ‘obsessive’.” 

“To a degree…” She murmured, tilting her head as she thought. “It feels… like a tug.” She said, “I am constantly drawn toward him, I can feel him… as he said, it’s even more like that when we are apart. I am constantly aware of where he is, and often I feel how he does…” she slanted a glance at Tarquin, “I don’t like anyone else touching him… the jealousy is strong. Even, apparently, when the other female has been dead for centuries…”

“And you have truly not accepted the bond yet?”

“Not yet…” Elain chewed at her lip. “Do you think it will get stronger then?”

“The bond, I should think so…”

“No, the jealousy.” She breathed.

“Oh, I don’t know…” Tarquin looked at her thoughtfully. “I suppose it might, especially at first… I hear that males get quite territorial until they learn to control it. Especially during the mating frenzy…”

“Everyone always talks about how the males react…” she said, “But not the females…”

Tarquin flicked a grin her way. “You might ask your sister…”

For an instant, she thought that Tarquin had been referring to Nesta before she realised that he meant Feyre. “She would likely only regale me with details about Rhys and the mating frenzy.” With a start, Elain thought about Viviane. She knew that the Lady of the Winter Court would be only too happy to tell her anything she wanted to know, although, Elain wasn’t too sure about any experience with jealousy that Viviane might have had. She didn’t know if Kalias had had previous lovers before his current wife, although, as High Lord, he would have undoubtedly had no shortage of admirers and females trying to get his attention. 

“Ahh… I suppose one would not relish these tales from a sibling…”

“Very much not.” Elain muttered, “She so loves the details… and then every time I look at Rhys I think about it…”

Tarquin laughed, and Elain looked at him in surprise. His laugh sounded like the tide coming in and she found it utterly fascinating. 

“There is another garden below this balcony.” He told her, “I am sure you will find something worthy of your book in there while I have the other brought to you. Apparently Varian will return by early afternoon, just after the lunch meal. You are welcome to join me on my balcony, again.”

“Thank you.” Elain smiled at him, “That should give me plenty of time to take what I need from there before Lucien and I head out into the slopes down the south side of the mountain.”

“I hope that you enjoy yourself. The weather is meant to be perfect for such an outing.”

Elain smiled as they headed for the stairs. She pulled her book from her pocket as she went, hoping that she found exactly what she wanted in the garden below. Not knowing what she really expected from the Summer Court by way of flowers, Elain swallowed her excitement. She was keen to find out what Summer grew, and see how much her skills had improved of late.


	89. Chapter Eighty-Nine

**Chapter 89**

Elain leaned back against the tree, her legs stretched out before her, and Lucien’s head resting gently in her lap. As a soft breeze passed them, she glanced down at him laying in the grass, reading quietly to her from the book he had brought with him, before she returned her eyes to her half completed sketch. The tiny red flowers grew in abundance around the tree currently supporting her spine, and this had appeared the perfect place to stop for a rest as they had wandered down the south side of the mountain from the city. She added another detail to the petals, squinting at the little flowers, trying to figure out what she was missing as Lucien’s voice washed over her. He had returned earlier from wherever he had gone with Varian in a somewhat pleased mood, and he had been all too eager for them to head out on their own.

Elain had been happy to go almost immediately, having sketched several flowers from the garden Tarquin had shown her. She wanted to make up for the way she had been last night, still feeling rather guilty for allowing her jealousy to take hold like that, and she wanted to apologise for what she had asked him about who he would have chosen between herself and Jesminda if the other female had still been alive. That hadn’t been fair, and she didn’t feel right about it. 

They hadn’t gone to bed angry with one another, or even upset. Curling beneath the covers together, Elain had wrapped herself around Lucien as had become her habit, but still she felt as if the conversation hadn’t settled, and she wanted it to be done. 

When her sketch was about as good as she supposed it was going to get, she set the book aside, looking down at Lucien’s head in her lap again, and she smiled. Carefully, she trailed her fingers through his vibrant hair, noting the way the feel of it sent tingles throughout her body. His eyes flicked up to meet her own, and he smiled gently. “Are you listening to the story, Petal?” he asked, and Elain nodded. 

“I was…” 

“No longer?” he asked, and Elain bit her lip then. 

“I… wanted to tell you that I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Last night.”

Lucien lifted a hand, encircling Elain’s wrist with his fingers as he brought her hand down to his lips, pressing a kiss to her skin. “You don’t have to apologise for that…”

“I think I do.” She breathed, “I shouldn’t have asked you if you would choose to be with me or her… That wasn’t at all fair.”

“Elain…” he laced his fingers through hers, not releasing her hand. “You’re my mate. You can always ask me anything…”

“It was cruel.”

“It wasn’t.” he held her hand tightly, “I completely understand you needing an answer to that question. I understand the uncertainty…”

“I’m sorry I was jealous…”

“It’s okay.”

“No…” She shook her head, combing her free hand through his hair again, “I don’t want you to be afraid to talk about her with me. You loved her, and she was important, and I want you to feel free to discuss her. I want you to share with me… and if I’m always jealous of her, then you won’t be able to do that, and you should be.”

Lucien sat up and turned to face her, and Elain met his gaze, feeling guilty. She watched him, able to see him thinking as he looked at her. One of his hands came up to her cheek, his thumb tracing her cheekbone slowly. 

“You don’t need to be jealous of Jesminda.” He told her, his voice gentle as the light breeze caressing them on its way to the ocean.

“I don’t know how to stop.” She told him, “I don’t want to be but the same thought keeps going over and over in my mind. If she were still here, perhaps your love for her would be stronger than the bond… and you would want her more than me.”

Lucien’s metallic eye whirred and he frowned, both of his eyes narrowing as he looked at her. “There’s nothing to say that she and I would have even still been together…”

“You loved her.” Elain breathed, and he nodded.

“I did. And she loved me.” He replied, “But she was wild… she was impulsive and unpredictable.” He smiled softly, and Elain’s heart clenched, “She was the first to love me for who I was and not because I was the High Lord’s son… and so I loved her.” His eyes locked on Elain’s then, “But… I have changed since then. Perhaps she would not love who I have become… Perhaps she would have grown bored of me… perhaps it just wouldn’t have lasted all this time…”

Elain stared at him. “You can’t know that…”

“No.” he agreed, “Just like I can’t know that we would have been as in love now as we had been then.” He shifted closer to her, and Elain ran a hand up his arm to his shoulder. “But you…” his fingers moved across her jaw and down her throat, “My mate… I love you with an intensity I’ve never felt anything before… and I know it will last an eternity, because that’s what being mates promises us…”

Elain felt herself grow hot at those words. “Really?” she asked, and Lucien nodded, his eyes earnest. Her heart felt lighter, and she smiled at Lucien as she shifted to her knees, wanting to wrap her arms around him, wanting to crawl into his lap. She wanted him to kiss her, wanted him to show her how much he was looking forward to his eternity with her. It was so comforting, she realised, to know that she had him, would have him, by her side for as long as they would live. To know that the love wouldn’t just fade away until one day they realised that it had been gone for years. Elain pitied every faerie who had ever lived or, who would ever live, who would never find their mate. Even more so, she pitied any who did find their mate only to be rejected. It was almost unbelievable for her now to think that she had ever put Lucien through the fear that she may not accept him, that she hadn’t wanted anything to do with him after the war. 

“I’m sorry.” She murmured, crawling into his lap and kissing his cheek. “I’m sorry for ever hurting you.” She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her face into his hair. “Anything I’ve ever said, or anything I’ve done that has hurt you… I wish I could take it back…”

“Elain…” he breathed, and she could hear the slight laugh in his voice as his hands rubbed circled into her back when she leaned into him, “Don’t worry about it.” She felt his hands in her hair then, and she closed her eyes. “We have so very long to spend together making sure everything we do is right… and even if that doesn’t prove the case, we can make up for it…”

She nodded, still pressing her face into his hair, her hands firm on his back now. “I want to accept it…” she murmured, and Lucien went so very still instantly. “The bond…” she breathed, “As soon as we get back…”

It was several long moments before Lucien moved again, his hand slowly tracing gentle circles across Elain’s lower back. “If that’s what you want.” His voice was low and soft, but she could hear the longing in it. 

“It is.” She told him. “It’s what I want.”


	90. Chapter Ninety.

**Chapter 90**

Pulling Elain to her feet, Lucien pressed a kiss to her cheek. He bent to pick up their books, tucking them under his arm before taking her hand and smiling at her. “Let’s go down to the shore.” He suggested, “The rockpools are quite interesting.”

“What’s in them?” She asked, and his smile widened.

“Something different each time…”

It didn’t escape his notice that Elain stuck close to him, her hand holding firmly to his own, as they walked down to the shore. He could tell that she had felt horrible about what she had asked him the night before, and he felt horrible that he hadn’t immediately banished her fear by telling her that she was his only choice. Dismissing the question immediately, he had thought, wouldn’t have helped her to feel better as she may have just thought he was telling her what she wanted to hear. Lucien had figured that if he gave the question proper thought, she would get more satisfaction from his answer. 

By the time they got down onto the sand, he was sweating under the hot Summer sun, and he was eyeing the water with interest. “Here…” he slipped his jacket off, and set it down on the sand, their books atop it before he looked to Elain with a smile. “Come up here…” he led her toward the low flat rocks nearby where he’d found some rock pools the last time he had visited the court. Elain followed him quickly, having taken her shoes off and set them beside his jacket. 

They wandered around the rocks for about half an hour, bending to look at shells and small creatures here and there, and Lucien had wondered if Elain wasn’t mere seconds from going to fetch her little book to begin drawing what they had found. By the time they got to a little outcropping of rock, Lucien was pleased to find a deeper pool that he remembered and, as he stood watching the larger of the waves approaching wash over the edge to add more water to the pool, he began pulling his shirt up and over his head. 

“What are you doing?” Elain asked, and he could hear a laugh in her voice. 

“Got to get into the water.” He grinned, “I am so hot.” He began stripping off the rest of his clothes and he glanced at Elain when he heard her gasp. 

“Lucien!”

“Yes?”

“… anyone could see…” She moved toward him and he grinned at her before slipping into the pool, his eyes closing in pleasure at the cool water sliding over his skin. 

“There’s nobody anywhere near us.” He looked up at her standing at the edge of the rock. “Join me…” He watched as Elain glanced around them, squinting into the distance, before looking back at him uncertainly and biting her lip. It was clear that she wanted to. “Come on, Petal…” 

Lucien’s grin widened the moment he saw her give in. Elain’s hands began undoing her dress before she sank down beside the pool as she pulled it off and he reached a hand out to her to help her in. “You sure nobody…” Her dark eyes moved up and down the beach again, and Lucien nodded. 

“There’s nobody here but us.”

When she slipped into the water Lucien caught her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her to himself. “It’s deeper than I thought…” she murmured and he smiled, pressing a kiss to her cheek as he held her. 

“I’ve got you.”

The way she clung to him made his heart swell, and he couldn’t believe he had ever allowed her to wonder if he would have chosen to be with her or not. “I know.” She breathed, and Lucien turned, swirling her around in the water. 

“I love you.” He told her, lifting his head to press his lips to hers gently. Her smile made his heart quicken its pace and he tightened his hold on her. “I will always choose you.” He breathed, and he knew that it was true. There was no way he would ever not choose Elain. It was impossible for him to not want her. The look in her dark eyes then told Lucien that she knew precisely what he was telling her, and he kissed her again, groaning when she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck in response.

He had told her last night that he didn’t know what he would have done if Jesminda had still been alive. It was clear to him now what his choice would have been. He had loved Jesminda. At the time he had thought she was his mate, and that he would never love anyone more than he had loved her. He hadn’t known what the bond felt like, however. The way that he loved Elain was more in every way. 

He met her gaze again and knew that she was aware of his nature of his thoughts. Tears filled her dark eyes and the relief he felt down the bond from her just about took Lucien’s breath away. “Petal…” he said softly, lifting a hand to her cheek as he turned them again and moved to the edge of the pool. The rock was smooth here, and Lucien pressed Elain back against it, his hands sliding down to her waist to hold her there as he pressed his lips to hers once more. “Elain…”

Her hands skimmed his shoulders an instant before she kissed him back and he let it all wash over him. As the waves continued to roll in, creating little ripples across their pool as the largest of them crossed the flat rock, Lucien tightened his hold on Elain. Slowly, ever so slowly, he kissed her. His hands held her gently back against the smooth rock, and he pinned her hips with his own, as he licked carefully at her lower lip. When she opened to him, he grinned, not increasing his pace in the slightest, despite Elain’s frustrated growl as her own hands tightened on his shoulders. He knew that he was hard, but he wanted to just enjoy this a little before they did anything further.

Lucien continued to kiss Elain slowly, deliberately, enjoying the feeling of her body tremble against his own as her hands pulled at him. Slowing down even further, he held her in place, trying to breathe thorough his own desire. He wanted her hot and desperate for him before he even thought about entering her. Gasping into the kiss when one of Elain’s hands slipped down between them and she took hold of him while hooking one of her legs around his hip, Lucien brought one of his own hands up to take hold of her face. Holding her still, the tip of his nose just about touching hers, Lucien met Elain’s dark brown gaze and held it as he so very slowly pushed himself inside of her. Her soft gasp stirred his blood, but he kept hold of her face, his eyes locked on hers as he pushed into her over and over. Watching Elain intently as he moved, Lucien couldn’t look away as his desire began to build as he could see her begin to unravel. She whimpered softly, and soon was begging him for more, for everything he had, and Lucien gave it to her, his hand still holding her face so he could watch her, and her hands scratched at his back as she clung to him.

“Lucien…” Elain’s voice was a whimper on the gentle breeze, and he only pushed harder, earning another whimper as she clutched at him, her eyes closing for a moment. Lucien let out a soft pant, trying to maintain his rhythm, his eyes still intently upon Elain’s face as he thrust again and again, wanting her to feel as if he had claimed her. 

“You… are… ahh…” he groaned, nearly losing it when she opened her eyes to meet his again, “Mine.” He panted, “You’re… all… I could… ever want…”

Elain nodded as best she could with his hand still holding her face, and Lucien released her. Her head tilted back almost instantly as she looked to the sky, and her other leg hooked instantly around his waist as he continued to smoothly thrust into her, taking his now free hand over her shoulder to grip at the rock, pulling himself to meet her more easily. Elain let out a cry, and Lucien began grinding up into her after every thrust. He grinned at her low moan, and an instant later one of her hands was in his hair as the other clutched at his shoulder. 

He could only ever want her, he knew that, and he told her so, murmuring into her ear between thrusts. Her hand tightened on his shoulder, her nails pricking at his skin as she moaned again. Slipping one of his own hands around to the back of Elain’s neck, he held her where he could watch her face as he moved more quickly. Her eyes closed again and he couldn’t look away from her face as he moved. She was hot and tight around him and felt himself approaching his edge an instant before Elain shrieked, tumbling into him down the bond and taking him with her as she fell. 

When he could breathe again, Lucien pressed his lips gently to Elain’s cheek as he felt her pull her nails from his skin. “You and I belong together.” He whispered, shifting his lips to her ear. “We belong to one another…”

“Yes.” She breathed, and he smiled, gliding his lips along her jaw, not yet ready to pull away and release her. 

“I can hardly wait until the bond is made what it should be…”

She gave a gentle laugh at that and Lucien lifted his head to look at her. “Soon…” she promised and his heart quickened at the thought. He nodded, but then spun around as he felt someone approach. Elain’s eyes had widened as she had looked past him, and Lucien knew exactly where Varian would be as he turned. 

The dark-skinned faerie looked down at them, one of his eyebrows raised and Lucien felt Elain press herself to his back, sinking in the water to hide herself behind him. He felt her press her face into his shoulder, and he heard her mortified whimper. 

“Ah… apologies…” Varian said softly, “Tarquin asked that I let you know that you should return to the city before nightfall… which is in less than an hour.”

“Thank you.” Lucien said evenly.

“Yes… ah… dinner is, again, during sundown…”

“We shall return with all due haste.” Lucien said and Varian nodded once before turning and striding away. Elain as still tucked against Lucien’s back and, when he spun to face her, he found her practically scarlet. “It’s okay, Petal.” He smiled, stroking her cheek with his fingers. 

“He had to have seen…”

“I don’t think so.” Dark eyes met his and Lucien smiled, sliding an arm around her waist once more to draw her in and kiss her gently, “I think we’re fine… now, let’s get out of here and back up to the city. I’m rather hungry, aren’t you?”

“Yes…” Elain let Lucien help her up out of the rockpool where she quickly pulled on her dress before standing up. He followed her, tugging his pants on before they went to retrieve their other things from where they had left them. “Do… you really think he didn’t see anything?”

Lucien wasn’t sure, but he doubted Varian would have watched if he had have accidentally seen anything. “He’s not the perving kind.” He said instead, watching Elain as she nodded her acceptance of that assessment. “Come on, Petal…” 

Taking her hand in his, Lucien began to lead her back up to the city, hoping they would have the time to bathe quickly before dinner. He would like to get the salt water off of his skin before they had to sit at a table, and he rather liked the idea of getting Elain out of her dress again as soon as possible.


	91. Chapter Ninety-One

**Chapter 91**

Exhaustion filled Lucien, flooding through his body and into every one of his limbs. He knew that he would sleep well tonight. It hadn’t been that long of a day, but he felt as if a lot had happened. The sun had risen earlier than he was used to, and he’d walked a bit with Varian, discussing the Court and what had been happening, and then he’d spent much of the afternoon with Elain. Their little escapade in the rockpool had taken a lot out of him, he figured. 

Lucien was honestly surprised that he’d kept himself off of her for so long after she’d told him that she wanted to accept the bond as soon as they’d gotten back to the Night Court. He’d waited months to hear those words, and it was only the fact that he could picture the moment so clearly in his mind now that he could believe that it had really happened and hadn’t just been some dream or fantasy. He’d had plenty of those dreams since he had first met her, and those memories had always had that ethereal dream quality, but this? This had happened. Elain had held him and told him that she was going to accept the bond. She wanted to be his mate. She wanted to be his, wholly and completely, and he hadn’t imagined a moment of it.  
They had sat through dinner with Tarquin, this time Varian had joined them, and Lucien had watched Elain try to avoid the eye of both the High Lord and his Captain of the Guard. He knew that she was convinced that Varian had seen too much down at the rockpools and that he had since let Tarquin know what he had seen. Lucien wasn’t as convinced. Tarquin had given no indication that he knew anything, and had been as pleasant as ever. The High Lord had informed Lucien that he would be free to discuss any further questions that might remain before his report was sent to Rhys, and Lucien had agreed to meet with him the next morning. The rest of the meal had been spent in polite conversation, while Lucien had been unable to keep his hands off of Elain beneath the table and, by the time they returned to their room once the sun had set, he knew that he wanted nothing more than to curl up with her beneath the covers of their large and extremely soft bed. 

Elain was sitting in front of the low vanity, pulling her brush through her hair, and Lucien just watched her as he reclined on their bed, leaning back against the wooden headboard. Her hair was shining in the dim firelight, and even though he was across the room he knew just how soft it was, and exactly how it would feel as he ran his hands through it. As she continued to brush it, Lucien allowed himself to draw a deep breath, able to smell the soft floral scent of the shampoo she had used on it. 

“You appear to be staring at me, love.” Elain’s warm eyes met his in the mirror and Lucien couldn’t help a smile.

“Can you blame me?” he asked, lifting both hands to rest behind his head. “You’re the most captivating creature I have ever seen.”

The brush continued to move steadily through that stunning golden-brown hair, and Lucien had to actively resist getting up and going to her across the room. “Lucien…” she murmured, and he sat a little straighter, listening. “Would you come here and braid this for me?”

Lucien was on his feet before he’d even processed her words. “Of course.”

“Thank you.” Her eyes held his in the mirror when he came to stand behind her, taking the brush from her hand and moving it gently through her hair. When she smiled at him, he set the brush aside and began sectioning her hair. It was just as soft as he’d known it was and he couldn’t help allowing his fingers to move through it more than necessary just so that he could enjoy how wonderful it felt. “You look tired, love.”

“I am.” He replied, his fingers moving to begin the braid easily. 

“Me too…” She smiled at him in the mirror again, and Lucien allowed his fingers to trace over her, brushing against her skin whenever possible. He watched in the mirror as her eyes closed and her smile widened and he sought to complete the braid quickly, fastening it when it was finished. Elain got to her feet then and turned to face him. Lucien grinned at her, lifting a hand to her cheek, and let his eyes move across her face.

“Ready to get into bed?” he asked and Elain nodded. “We’re heading to Dawn next, right?”

“Yes.”

“And then the Day Court?”

“We are.”

Elain gestured to the bed and he returned to it, slipping beneath the covers before he noticed that she had gone to her pack and was rummaging through it. She straightened a moment later, and he saw that she held a book he had not seen before in her hands. “I got this for you a while ago.” She said, “When you took off to put some distance between us, before we went to the Mortal Lands…”

“Oh?”

Elain crawled on to the bed then, moving toward him where she lay down and he flicked the blankets over her. “Tell me what you know about the Day Court…”

“Well…” he took the book she passed him read the title out loud, “Customs and Features of the Day Court” 

“I thought you might like to read it.”

“Yes…” Lucien smiled when Elain leaned against him, and he ran a hand over her shoulder and down her arm. “The Day Court is known for its libraries.” He told her, “Before Amarantha ravaged it, The Day Court used to have vast libraries, and it was long responsible for collecting and housing Prythian’s magic knowledge.”

“That’s interesting…”

“Yes… Actually, if you want to, while we’re there, you might be able to learn a bit about being a seer…” He glanced at her face, smiling when he saw her nodding thoughtfully. 

“True…” one of her hands came to rest against his chest as her head settled against his shoulder. “And you can learn a bit about your father…”

Lucien’s heart stuttered at the thought of facing Helion while knowing that he was, in fact, his father. “Y-yeah…”

“Here…” Elain tapped the book she had handed him. “There’s a chapter on him inside…”

“Is that why you bought it?”

“Possibly.” Elain stretched up and pressed her lips to his cheek. “Do you plan on telling Helion that he’s your father.”

Lucien tilted his head slightly, mulling over the question. “I… suppose so…” He said gently, “I’m not exactly one to keep things like that to myself without saying something so, I figure, that I’ll end up saying something about it to him at some point.”

Elain’s hand tightened on his arm and he looked down at her. “I can feel your apprehension.” She murmured, “What are you worried about?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien said, enjoying the feeling of Elain laying against him again, “I… I don’t know what I even expect him to say or do…”

“Do you want a relationship with him?” Elain asked, “Where… he acts like your father… and he … treats you like a son?”

“I…” He paused, considering. “I… would that be strange?”

“I don’t think so…”

“I don’t think I’ve really considered it… but…” He nodded, “I would like to get to know him…”

“Are you worried that he won’t care at all…”

He hadn’t thought about it explicitly, but at Elain’s’ words, Lucien knew that he was worried about that and he nodded again. “Yeah…”

“He and your mother…” Elain murmured, “Do you think they really loved one another?”

“I hope so.”

“Then, I don’t think he would be anything other than pleased to have the chance to speak with you, get to know you…”

“I guess we will find out, won’t we?”

“Who would be able to deny this face…?” one of Elain’s hands came up to his face and Lucien grinned when she stroked his cheek, her fingers tracing his scar to his jaw. His breath caught when she slid her hands down his chest and below the blankets as she pushed herself up onto her other elbow to hold herself, up. Swallowing thickly, Lucien tried to force himself to breathe when her hand slid into his pants and she looked up to meet his eyes.

“Petal?” he choked, trying not to jump when she took hold of him. “Ugh…”

The pretty smile she gave him in return silenced Lucien and he just watched as she pulled him free of his pants and shifted herself so that she was crouched over his legs, her hand moving slowly, yet firmly, over him. “Yes?” she asked, licking her lips as she met his eyes again. Lucien couldn’t make himself say anything in response, and all he managed to do was lift a hand to her hair, sliding around to the back of her neck, when she bent over him, taking him in to her deliciously hot mouth.

“Ohh… shit…” Lucien groaned and closed his eyes, unable to do anything at all except gasp and shift his hips when he felt Elain’s tongue on him. They continued in this way, with Lucien muttering and gasping and groaning while Elain did whatever she pleased and he stroked her hair and neck and shoulders and tried his hardest to allow her to remain in control of the situation. It wasn’t at all long later that he came with a cry, and he opened his eyes again to watch as she licked her lips once more before moving back up over him. “You…” Lucien wrapped an arm around Elain’s waist, holding her firmly against himself. “Do… you like that…?”

“Hmm…” She cuddled against him, “I like the sounds you make…” she nodded, “So, Yeah… I do…”

Smiling to himself, Lucien pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Perfect.” He murmured as exhaustion spready through him once more. Carefully, he flipped open the book she had given him, looking for the chapter on Helion. “Okay…” he murmured, clearing his throat a moment later. “Helion. High Lord of the Day Court…”


	92. Chapter Ninety-Two

**Chapter 92**

Elain tightened her grip on Lucien’s hand. She couldn’t help the shiver that shook her entire body and she moved closer when he turned his eyes on her, the look he was giving her was clearly meant to be reassuring. “Tarquin said they’d been seen…?”

Lucien gave her a slow nod. “It’s not surprising really.” He told her as they walked up the path. “They’re scared of Tamlin, so they wouldn’t have dared to cross his border, and Kallias would never have welcomed them there.”

“So they came here…?” Elain shuddered again and Lucien wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

“Tarquin said that they weren’t impressed with being turned away.”

“Would anyone take them in?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien replied softly, “They’ve always been welcomed wherever they’ve gone because they had the status of being Beron’s sons… Now that they’ve been exiled they don’t have that status, and it’s not as if their charming personalities have endeared them to anyone.”

“When were they here?”

“He said they presented the day before we did, and they haven’t been seen since.”

“Does Tarquin think they’re still around?” Elain tried to swallow the nervousness she felt, and Lucien gave her a knowing look, tightening his arm around her. 

“No…” 

Narrowing her eyes, she looked at his face. “… but?” she asked, knowing there was something he wasn’t saying. 

“But…” he admitted, “Varian… isn’t sure they’ve left.”

Elain’s eyes flicked around them, taking in the path and everything else. “What?” she yelped, “Why? What? They could be anywhere!”

“It’s okay…” 

She didn’t think it was okay. They had planned to winnow their way through the court to the Winter border, and then winnow as far across as they could until they reached the border for the Dawn Court. If Lucien’s brothers were wandering around, then they weren’t safe. “Lucien…” She murmured, her stomach twisting.

“Hey…” He squeezed her closer, “I’ll protect you.”

“And who will protect you?” She asked, frowning. 

“You will.” He grinned and Elain couldn’t help smiling back at him. 

“Deal.” She murmured, relaxing slightly when he pressed a kiss to her temple. Adjusting the strap of her pack over her shoulder, Elain continued to walk, keeping pace with Lucien as they headed for the spot from which they could winnow.

The first time they winnowed took them to the border, and Lucien showed her the spot through which they could enter the Winter Court. She had been glad she’d brought the blue cloak he had given her and, pulling it tightly around herself, she found herself smiling at the sight of the stunning frozen landscape. 

“Ooof.” Lucien rubbed his arms. “Summer to Winter is always rough.”

Elain smiled at him, taking his hand again. “Well,” she grinned, “Let’s make sure we have a hot bath when we get to the Dawn Court.”

“We?” Lucien’s lips quirked into a smile. “Oh, I do like that plan…”

“Good.” Elain stepped closer to him, allowing him to wrap his arms around her before he winnowed them again. Clinging to him, Elain felt his exhaustion. “When we get to Dawn,” she said softly, “I’m going to take care of you…” she lifted a hand to brush his vibrant hair away from his face, “You think about what you want, and I’ll make sure you get it…”

“You are delightful.” He told her, drawing a deep breath and letting out a heavy sigh. Elain felt him gathering his strength again before his hold on her tightened and he winnowed them again. “This is the border…”

“To Dawn?”

“Not quite… we have to cross the mountains…”

“Oh…” Elain took the cloak off when she felt the temperature change. “Wait…” turning to look at him, Elain frowned, “The mountains that aren’t part of… Was this where Amarantha held Court?”

“Yes.”

“Oh…” She took his hand again, “How long will it take to cross?”

“I think I can get us pretty close to the Dawn border.” He told her, and Elain nodded, smiling up at him. 

“Have I told you how impressive you are?”

Lucien gave a low laugh and shook his head. “Winnowing is not that impressive.” She felt his free hand ghost over her shoulder and down her arm. “I can’t even really go that far compared to some other faeries.”

“I think it’s pretty good.” She rolled up her cloak and stuffed it into her pack. “Let me know when you’re ready…”

“Yeah, alright.” She watched Lucien roll his shoulders, adjusting his own pack. “Let’s go, Petal…” he snaked an arm around her shoulders, “Thinking I might like a long massage later…”

“During or after our bath?” she asked, her eyes closing when he pressed his lips to her forehead. 

“Both.” He replied, and then he winnowed them.

Lucien staggered slightly, and Elain held tightly to him. “Maybe we should rest a bit…” she suggested. “Sit down…”

“I’m okay…”

“Lucien, listen to me.”

“Alright…” He sank down on the dirt and Elain looked around them.

“How far from the border do you think we are.”

“Not far.” He gestured at some nearby trees, “Just through there… We’ll cross on foot again, and then it should be one more to the city.”

“Okay…” Elain moved around behind him, leaning over to rub gently at his shoulders. “Do you need some water?” she asked, and he shook his head. 

“No, I’m okay.” Russet and gold eyes met hers before he pushed himself to his feet. “Let’s do it.” He slung his pack back over his shoulder and Elain moved for the trees. “The Dawn Court is lovely.” He said, “I think you’ll enjoy it.”

“I’m sure I will.” Elain looked over her shoulder at him, smiling. 

“So far you’ve liked all of th-” Lucien’s words were cut off by a breathy gasp and Elain’s blood went cold at the sight of a long black arrow suddenly protruding from his left shoulder.

“Lucien…” Dropping her pack, she hurried toward him, reaching him as his knees buckled and he dropped into the dirt. Going with him, Elain tried to look at his shoulder. “No… No…”

“It’s…” Lucien grit his teeth and Elain watched with horror as he wrapped his hand around the arrow shaft and yanked it out of his shoulder. He made a face and Elain didn’t know what to do. “Faebane…”

“It’s… what?” Elain asked, her eyes wide, “No… does that mean you can’t heal?”

“I…” he glanced up to meet her gaze then and Elain saw his eyes go wide. “… Run…”

Elain barely had a moment to process his words before something seized her hair and yanked her backward and away from Lucien. She screamed, kicking and trying to get free, but to no avail. Someone kicked her in the stomach and she screamed again, her hands clawing at the hand still holding her by her hair. She was yanked upright then, and felt another hand grab hold of the back of her dress and then she was jolted backwards as she heard a rip. Elain continued to try and get herself free, still clawing at the hand in her hair and, when it finally released her, she had only a moment to try and balance herself before something struck her and she was sent back into the dirt.

Somebody grabbed her, dragging her further through the dirt before she was hauled to her knees. 

“We knew we’d find you…”

Elain’s head was pulled back and she saw Connal standing over her. He dragged her higher, pulling her to her feet and then she saw Tallan, standing over Lucien. Lucien’s snarl sent shivers through Elain and she gasped when Tallan’s boot suddenly connected with Lucien’s bloody shoulder, sending her mate sprawling back into the dirt.


	93. Chapter Ninety-Three

**Chapter 93**

“No!” Elain surged forward when Tallan kicked Lucien as he tried to rise. Yelping when Connal yanked her back by her hair again, she could only watch as Tallan lifted his foot to press down on Lucien’s bloody shoulder, grinning when Lucien gave a pained cry. “Don’t!”

Tallan pressed his weight down on Lucien, groaning beneath him, and Elain watched as her mate’s hands wrapped around his brother’s foot and ankle, trying to lift it. Tallan’s amber eyes flicked up to look at Elain, and he grinned. “Are you ready for a show?” He pulled his sword from its sheath, looking back down at Lucien who could not get out from under him. Elain could hear Lucien’s heart, already beating too quickly, and as her own began to match his rhythm, she began to panic.

“No… No!” She struggled against Connal, unable to break his hold on her as she grew hot and her pulse began to pound in her ears. Suddenly she turned and, like she had once seen Cassian show Nesta, she struck Connal in the throat as hard as she could. The red-headed faerie released her instantly, staggering back as he spluttered, and Elain turned and ran at Tallan, throwing herself at him. 

She had the brief flicker of thought, telling her that what she was doing was ridiculous, but she ignored it, desperation to save her mate driving her and a savagery she’d never known before pushing her to disregard her own safety and anything her head was telling her. Elain collided with Tallan, who was apparently caught off guard, and they both fell into the dirt. Elain was slightly surprised, and more than a little impressed with herself, for a second, but then that second ended when Tallan wrapped a hand around her throat and hauled her to her knees. He dragged her away from Lucien, her feet kicking through the dirt and rocks scratching at her as she struggled to get free from him. She couldn’t even scream with his hand so tight around her throat, so she just stared at Lucien as he managed to push himself up, his own russet and gold eyes locked on to her face. 

Tallan came to a halt and pulled one of Elain’s arms around behind her back, forcing her to her knees again. She kept her eyes on Lucien, through the hair that had come loose from her braid and was falling into her face. He was watching her intently, a low snarl ripping from him as he forced himself up and Elain saw when his eyes widened again as they flicked away from her. She couldn’t help the gasp that escaped her when Malak came into view and Lucien surged to his feet, but Malak hit him with a blast of flame and he threw himself to the side to try and avoid it. Elain gasped again and Tallan twisted her arm up higher behind her back, releasing her throat to grab her other arm and twist it to join the first. 

Before Lucien could get to his feet again Connal and Malak were on him, dragging him forward and pinning him down on the ground. Connal just about sat on Lucien’s back, trying to keep him down while Malak laughed, his grin wide upon his nasty face. Whimpering when Malak laughed again, pulling a long curved blade from his belt, Elain tried twisting away from Tallan, but he only yanked her arms higher and she let out a pained sob.

“Get your hands off of her!” Lucien’s voice was low and feral, and he struggled against his brothers, trying to get up off the ground. Elain could feel his panic and desperation and, an instant later, he met her eyes again. “Elain…”

Malak lifted his blade and Elain let out a shriek. She wasn’t about to watch Lucien be killed, not while she still had breath in her. Throwing her head back, she heard a satisfying grunt from Tallan and he took a step back, pulling her with him. He released one of her arms, throwing her forward then and Elain managed to catch herself with her left hand before she sprawled in the dirt. “Bitch…” he muttered, as his grip on her other arm tightened for a moment. Elain had barely lifted her head, wondering what he was about to do before Tallan broke her arm. She heard the snap, loud and shocking, and then she heard herself screaming. 

Lucien let out a roar, and Elain was vaguely aware of Connal falling into the dirt as Lucien managed to get to his feet. Tallan had seized her hair then, however, yanking her up to her knees. He pulled her head back and she saw his face, a little bloody from where she had hurt him. He grinned at her and held up a large silver blade for her to see. Unable to move, Elain could only watch as he lowered it, bringing it to her throat as he pushed her forward again. She was surprised he hadn’t cut her, but she sucked in a sharp breath all the same when he pressed the blade to her skin as she held herself braced with her good hand in the dirt. “Oh, Lucien…”

She was whimpering in pain, her breath coming in shallow gasps as she cradled her broken arm to herself. Tears filled her eyes, and she blinked them away, trying to see through them. “Let her go!” Lucien’s voice was firm, and Elain tried to look up to see him. 

“Drop it, or I cut her throat…” That was Tallan, and an instant later, Elain heard the distinctive sound of metal hitting rock. She wiped the back of her good hand across her eyes, blinking again as things came into focus. Lucien had his hands raised, his eyes firmly upon her, as Connal and Malak took hold of him and forced him to his knees once more. Tallan laughed then and Elain drew a sharp breath when his blade pressed against her throat. 

“Look, you have me…” Lucien’s voice was soft, but she could hear the fear behind it. “I’m the one you’ve always hated… you don’t need to hurt her.”

“Don’t need to…” Malak agreed and Elain caught the look he gave to Tallan over her head. “But… it is fun.”

“No…” She whimpered, as Tallan leaned over her.

“Didn’t get to see those tits last time we saw one another.” Malak said mildly, and Elain remembered when he’d gotten hold of her in a courtyard in the Autumn Court and Eris had pulled him off of her. “Let’s have a look…” 

Tallan ripped what was left of her dress from her shoulders and Elain whimpered again. If she hadn’t been cradling her broken arm to her chest, the dress would have fallen off of her, completely exposing her to everyone. A feral snarl ripped from Lucien and he began struggling against his brothers again. “Don’t…”

“Little small, but not bad…” Malak laughed, using his foot to push Lucien back down, “Bet you like it just the same, don’t you, little brother?”

Lucien snarled again, and Elain tried to cover herself. “Of course he does.” Tallan muttered, “That’s why he’ll feel this…” Tears welled in her eyes again when Tallan grabbed a handful of her hair, yanking her head back once again and his blade came back to her throat. She could see Lucien struggling as both Malak and Connal restrained him. 

Fear slid down her spine, and she realised that Lucien’s brothers were never going to let them go.

“Elain…” Lucien’s voice was suddenly soft, “Look at me…” his russet and gold eyes were trained on her as he continued to try and struggle against his brothers, “Just look at me…” 

Images of the vision she had once had of what had happened to Jesminda on the floor in front of Beron’s throne flashed through Elain’s mind. The faerie had been forced to kneel while Lucien was made to watch, his brothers holding him down just as they were now, while her throat had been cut right in front of him. Elain went cold.

“Lucien…” she held his gaze, the terror in them was clear, as he tried to get to her and realised that he couldn’t. 

“This feels familiar, doesn’t it?” Malak chuckled, and Elain knew that this had been exactly what he had planned. No part of this was coincidental. 

“Look at me, Petal…”

“I’m sorry…” she breathed, her breath hitching when Tallan’s blade nicked at her throat. “I’m sorry I was too late…” Regret flooded her. Regret at the fact that she hadn’t accepted the bond yet. They had not been properly mated, and she was going to die, they both were, without ever properly knowing what that would have felt like.

“It’s okay… It’s okay…” Lucien shook his head, the look on his face breaking her heart.

“Lucien…” She choked, swallowing the tears threatening to overwhelm her. She blinked them away, wanting to be able to see him. “I love you.”

Malak kicked Lucien forward, and he tried crawling, still trying to get to her. “Don’t look away.” He told her. “Just look at me…”

“Oh, you want to look at one another?” Malak sounded amused and he strode past Lucien in the dirt toward Elain. “Why don’t we all do that? Get a good look?” 

“No…” She flinched away from him, then screamed when he grabbed the wrist of her broken arm and pulled it away from her body, ripping the dress from her a moment later. 

“One last look…”

Elain’s vision swam with the pain, and when she could focus several moment later it was to see Lucien on his feet. He gave an enraged roar and threw himself at Malak, and Elain saw that Connal was lying prone in the dirt not too far away. Tallan’s hand tightened in her hair, and he began dragging her through the dirt and away from the fight and Elain clawed at his hand with her good one, trying to get him to release her. She struggled against him, listening desperately to the sounds of Lucien grappling with Malak, wanting to know what was happening while Tallan forced her around so that she couldn’t see anything. 

The breath was knocked from her lungs when he threw her to the ground, and his weight pinned her an instant later, holding her in position. She felt the cool bite of his blade at her throat once again and she gave a pained cry when his hand squeezed roughly at one of her exposed breasts. “Is that the best you’ve got?” he asked, his grin inches from her own face as he loomed over her, “I know you can scream better than that…” his hand moved to grab her broken arm and she couldn’t bite back her shriek. “Do you remember?” Tallan murmured, as the sounds of the fight nearby continued on, “What I told Lucien I would do to you when you first visited the Autumn Court?”

_“I’m going to have a nice hot ride between her thighs…”_

The words echoed through Elain’s mind, but she shook her head. “No.”

“I’m sure I can remind you.” His hand went back to her breast while the other pressed the blade more firmly against her throat. She shrieked again when she felt him push a knee between her legs, forcing them apart. 

“No… get off me.” She tried to get out from under him, roll away, but could get nowhere, “Get off me!”

“Scream all you want…” he grinned at her, “I kind of like it.”

Elain knew that she shouldn’t, she didn’t want to give him what he wanted, but she couldn’t help it. The scream bubbled up within her, rage and terror and everything that was swirling around that had no release. Screaming was all she could do, unable to move and unable to stop him. So she screamed.


	94. Chapter Ninety-Four

**Chapter 94**

Elain couldn’t stop screaming. Every time Tallan touched her, she had flashes of different faerie faces. So many faces of other females that he had done this to. She could hear them crying and begging, some of them screaming like she was. None of it had made him stop. 

She struggled as he managed to get between her thighs, forcing them apart, and she scratched at him, clawing at his face. He struck her then, hard across her own face, and she was stunned into silence. Still and shaking as she struggled to draw breath, all Elain could hear was her blood pounding in her ears, and Lucien’s thunderous heartbeat somewhere nearby. He was still alive then.

When Tallan began fumbling with his pants, Elain began screaming again. “Oh, don’t make such a fuss…” He muttered, and Elain shuddered when she felt him hard against her thigh, “I’m sure Lucien’s broken you in well enough…”

Elain pushed at his shoulders, scratched at his face, and did anything she could think of to try and get Tallan off of her, but to no avail. When he managed to free himself from his pants, Elain began screaming for Lucien. 

“I’m going to use your whole body to make myself feel good…” Tallan’s breath was hot against her face and Elain just continued to scream.

“NO! NO!” She scratched at him again with her good hand, and tears blurred her vision when Tallan’s hand seized her wrist and pinned it in the dirt above her head. “No… LUCIEN?!”

Tallan was ripped from her so suddenly and with such force that Elain’s breath caught in her throat as she gasped. She didn’t have the time to do anything but watch as Tallan was yanked up by his hair as Lucien grabbed him. There was a loud _crack_ and then Tallan fell into the dirt unmoving, his head at an odd angle. Elain edged away from his body, and Lucien dropped to his knees beside her. His hands hovered over her, but didn’t touch, and Elain let out a small whimper. 

Shrugging out of his jacket, Lucien carefully lay it over Elain, covering her in place of her ruined dress. “Petal…?” his voice was thick, and she looked up at him. Both of his eyes were wide as they moved over her, coming to rest on her face. “Can I touch you…?” Elain forced herself up and just about climbed into his lap, wrapping her good arm around his neck. Lucien adjusted the jacket around her, and she could feel his hands shaking. “Are you hurt?” the words were practically sobbed, and Elain realised that he was crying. “Did he…? Elain, did he…”

“No.” she breathed, tightening her arm around him and pressing her face into his hair. “No…” She let a sob of her own out then, her fingers tracing the collar of his shirt repetitively as she sought comfort from the familiar texture. Lucien’s hands moved carefully over her back, and Elain closed her eyes, breathing him in. She felt his relief, matched only by her own, and she lifted her head a moment later to look at him. “Are you alright? Your shoulder…”

“I’m fine.”

Bringing her good hand around to his face, Elain caught one of his tears with her thumb, brushing it away. Looking him over, she noted several places from which he was bleeding, not just the shoulder which had taken the arrow tipped with faebane, and she frowned. “Where’s Malak?” 

“Dead.” His voice was expressionless now, but his hands were still firm on her. 

“And Connal?”

Lucien’s eyes flicked past her in the direction of his third brother. “Not dead, I think…” he paused for a moment, “Though I did hit him pretty hard.”

Laying her hand against Lucien’s cheek, Elain drew his eyes back to her. “I love you.” She told him, swallowing another sob. “I love you…”

Nodding, Lucien ran his hand up her back. “I know, Petal.” She leaned into him, laying her head against his shoulder as he held her firmly to himself “And I love you more than I can say.” With her eyes closed and the adrenaline beginning to leave her, Elain’s arm began to throb in earnest and she bit her lip against the mounting pain. “Elain…?”

“My arm…”

Lucien’s hand stopped moving on her back for a moment before he made a frustrated sound. “I cannot heal you.”

“Faebane…”

“Yes.”

“How long will it last?” she lifted her head to look at him. He had many injuries of his own that required healing as well. 

“I don’t know.”

Elain had been about to reply once more when Lucien suddenly got to his feet, lifting her into his arms as he did so. “What are you doing?” she murmured, her head swimming slightly. 

“We’re close to the Dawn border…”

Elain’s eyes closed as he moved, and she allowed exhaustion and pain to wash over her. Feeling safe now, she stopped struggling against it all and let it take her.

*

Lucien felt Elain go limp in his arms and, with a quick glance at her face, he adjusted his hold on her, tightening his arms around her, as he forced himself to walk steadily toward the nearby trees. If he could get them over the border into Dawn, then surely Thesan’s sentries would spot them and send someone to help them. He’d left their packs and everything else they had been carrying where they had fallen, near the bodies of his brothers, figuring that they could be sent for later. His main concern was Elain.

He knew that her arm was well and truly broken, he had heard the snap before her scream had sparked something fierce inside of him. Lucien didn’t remember how he had gotten off the ground, how he had bested Connal, but it had been Elain’s scream that had done it. Hearing his mate in pain had turned him feral, but Lucien was glad for that. If that hadn’t happened, then he feared they would both be dead by now.

Well, he thought, he would be dead. They would have done worse to Elain before they’d eventually killed her. Glancing down at her again, Lucien swallowed his anger. If he had been mere moments slower in getting to her… Unable to even properly form the thoughts about what Tallan had been about to do, Lucien tried to focus on the fact that he hadn’t been too slow. He had gotten there in time. He had gotten to her. She had screamed for him, and that had driven him on. 

Somehow, he had driven Malak’s own blade into his brother’s abdomen as they had wrestled on the ground, and then he’d been on his feet and throwing himself toward Elain. Panic and fear had flooded him at the sight of her beneath Tallan, her dress in tatters, as he had pinned her in the dirt. He barely remembered pulling his brother off of her, or what he had done next. A sick feeling twisted though him then when he realised that he had now killed three of his own brothers. Who else could say that, he wondered?

Holding Elain tightly to himself, Lucien knew that it was worth it. He would do it all again if it meant keeping her safe and, as he staggered across the border into the Dawn Court, he hoped that whoever it was who informed his mother that two more of her sons were dead did so gently. 

Thesan’s men were on them within moments, and Lucien found himself unable to release Elain. He snarled when someone tried to coax him into letting her go, even so they could check on her injuries, and it wasn’t until a female made the request of him that he was able to comply. He sat then, against a tree, as someone looked him over and someone else nearby was making plans to take them to Thesan’s Palace. He was still bleeding, he realised, suddenly noticing the blood running down his chest beneath his shirt, and down his arm, and he was thankful that they would soon be surrounded by those with the ability to heal. Someone who wasn’t poisoned with faebane. Closing his eyes, Lucien allowed himself to try and rest. They were safe. He’d gotten Elain to those who could help her, and that was all he had wanted. They were okay. With that thought, Lucien allowed himself to slip into blackness.


	95. Chapter Ninety-Five

**Chapter 95**

Silky soft sheets were the first things Elain noticed when she awoke. The light was gentle, as was the breeze that blew across the room from the open window. She pushed herself up to sit against the pillows and then realised that she had used both of her arms and, looking down at the one which had been broken, she realised that she had been healed.

“Elain?”

Lucien was sitting by her bed and, when Elain looked up, immediately got to his feet and moved closer. She watched him crawl onto the edge of the bed, reaching a hand out to her and she took his hand in hers, her eyes moving over him. “You look better…” she said and he nodded.

“I’ve had worse.” He said, giving her a gentle grin and Elain continued to look him over. The cuts and scrapes were gone and, carefully, she lifted a hand to pull the neck of his shirt away to try and see his shoulder where he’d taken that arrow. “All gone…” he told her, his hand sliding up her arm from her wrist to her elbow.

“Come here…”

Lucien didn’t need to be told twice. He instantly moved up the bed, settling himself beside Elain who leaned into him, wrapping one arm across him as she lay her head against his shoulder. “Do you feel better?” he asked, and she nodded slowly.

“I take it this is the Dawn Court?”

“It is.” His hand moved through her hair, and Elain closed her eyes. “Thesan’s people found us just after we crossed the border and they brought us here to the palace.”

“Did they ask what happened?”

“Yes.”

“What did you tell them?”

“The truth.” He replied, “My brothers attacked us and we defended ourselves…”

“Will you be punished for killing Malak and Tallan?”

“No.” his arm settled around Elain’s shoulders and she glanced up at his face. “It happened outside any Court, and they instigated it anyway… They’ve been exiled, so they didn’t even really belong to the Autumn Court. Eris is unlikely to seek retribution.”

“What will happen to Connal?”

“I don’t know…” She felt him sigh, and she ran a hand slowly up and down his side, her eyes on his face again. “He doesn’t belong to Eris any more… and … again, it was outside any of the Courts…”

Elain shuddered at the thought of Connal getting away with what he and the others had tried to do. “But we belong to the Night Court.” She said softly, “You are Rhys’ Emissary… and this is an official trip…”

Lucien nodded, a thoughtful look on his face. “Rhys might do something…”

“Feyre will.” Elain muttered, “and… if Nesta finds out…”

“You would have him put to death as well?” Lucien’s voice was soft and Elain tried to read his expression. 

“You wouldn’t?”

“My mother has now lost four sons…” he replied, his eyes on the window nearby, watching as the breeze blew the light curtain around. “I’ve killed three of them myself…”

“They came to kill you.” She reminded him and he nodded. 

“I know.” His fingers moved soothingly over her shoulder, “That doesn’t mean she doesn’t feel the loss.”

“Of course,” Elain murmured, still watching Lucien’s face. 

“I want him punished, but…”

“You don’t want to hurt your mother more.”

He looked at her then. “Does that disappoint you?” he asked, “That I don’t want him put to death for what they tried to do.”

“On the contrary.” Elain replied firmly, “That you would consider your mother, and not allow yourself to be blinded by anger and hate speaks highly of your character.”

Lucien gave her a twisted smirk then. “Well, I am glad you see it that way.”

“Do you wish you hadn’t killed Malak and Tallan?”

His face hardened then. “I… don’t even remember making the decision to do that. I was… driven…” he frowned slightly, his eyes moving across her face. “I was just trying to protect you.”

“Mate…” she murmured, and Lucien nodded. 

“You threw yourself at Tallan,” he smiled as he looked at her again, “You punched Connal in the throat and threw yourself at Tallan trying to help me…”

“I did.” Elain couldn’t help a smile of her own. “For a second or two I thought I’d done well, too…” 

“You did well to catch him off guard.” He replied, tightening his arm around her shoulders, drawing her into himself and pressing his lips to her forehead. “I don’t think he was used to being caught like that.”

“It didn’t last long…” She thought again of how Tallan had twisted her arms up around behind her back so she couldn’t move, and then broken one. As if sensing her thoughts, Lucien’s fingers slid down the arm that had been broken, tracing gently over her skin.

“Are you sure that it doesn’t hurt anymore?”

She looked at his hand on her arm and nodded. “It’s back to normal.”

“Even if I had have been in control, I would have killed him.” Lucien’s voice was low and dark, “For what he did, I would have killed him.” His fingers left her arm, and Elain felt them then beneath her chin, tilting her face up to him. “I’m sorry that I didn’t get there sooner.” He murmured, and Elain tightened her hold on his shirt. She felt his fingers slide along her jaw as he gently cupped her face, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he seemed to try to take every detail of her in. “If I had taken any longer…”

“But you didn’t.” she replied, holding his gaze steadily. 

“I can’t stop thinking about it.” He breathed, his fingers stroking her jaw. “I… I…”

“I know.” She told him, sliding her own hand up his chest to his shoulder. She knew that he’d been scared. It had been evident in his face when he’d dropped down beside her, reaching out, but afraid to lay his hands on her. It had been clear in the way he’d held her to himself after asking if he could touch her. If Tallan had succeeded in what he had been trying to do, Elain was sure that Lucien would have lost it completely. “But it didn’t happen.” She went on, “You were exactly where I needed you when I needed you…”

He nodded, his fingers still moving across her jaw. Elain could feel his relief, relief that Tallan hadn’t succeeded in what he had been trying to do, and relief that she didn’t blame him for the fact that things had gotten as far as they had. “I’m sorry that he touched you.” He said, eyes moving back and forth across her face, “I’m sorry that you had to endure that.”

“Was that why you were scared to touch me?”

Lucien tilted his head, “I… didn’t know if that would have made it worse.” He murmured, “If… you … would have preferred not to be touched after…”

“Maybe I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else to…” Elain said gently, “But you’re my mate…” She heard his heart quicken at those words, “Your touch could only ever make it better…”

He smiled at her, “Does that mean I’m allowed to kiss you, then?”

“Yes…” Elain went to smile at him, but he’d already bent to press his lips carefully to hers. She turned herself further toward him as Lucien kissed her slowly. He was gentle, tentative, and Elain was reminded of the very first time he had kissed her in their clearing in the Spring Court. That kiss had felt like fire, and so did this. As she opened to him and his deliberate, teasing licks, Elain couldn’t help the soft groan that escaped her. He knew that he could do this, she realised. He knew that he could make her hot, ache to feel him between her thighs, with nothing more than a kiss. 

The pleased look in his russet eye when he lifted his head to meet her gaze told Elain that he knew exactly the effect he had had on her, and he smiled. Elain leaned into him, wanting to kiss him again when a knock sounded on the door and they both froze.


	96. Chapter Ninety-Six

**Chapter 96**

Elain pulled the sheet higher when Thesan walked into the room. Lucien’s hand slid down her arm and took her hand and she leaned into him as the High Lord came to stand beside the bed. Looking up at him, Elain wondered if she had ever noticed how he appeared to glow before. 

“I am pleased to see you appear to be doing better…” His eyes swept over Elain and she gave a soft smile, hoping that he couldn’t see that she was blushing from what she and Lucien had just been doing. 

“We thank you.” Lucien put in, his fingers tracing over the back of Elain’s hand. “For what you’ve done for us…”

“It was no trouble.” Thesan replied, as two more faeries came into the room. “I had your things collected from where you told us you encountered… trouble.” The faeries set their packs down on a low couch by the wall. “Also, while we found Malak and Tallan, we found no sign of Connal…”

Elain felt Lucien stiffen. “He was gone?”

“Apparently so.”

Looking up at Lucien, Elain bit her lip. “What does that mean?” she asked, “He… he’s free to just… do what he wants?”

“Unless he’s found.” Lucien murmured, and Elain tightened her hand around his.

“What if he tries to kill you again…?” Her voice was soft as fear gripped her.

“Unlikely.” Lucien replied, “Connal was more of a follower…”

“I don’t know that ‘unlikely’ is enough…” Elain tried to calm down and Lucien continued to trace his fingers over the back of her hand. 

“It’s okay.” He said softly, “He won’t get near you again. I promise.”

“I’m talking about you.” She replied, eyes wide. “He wants you dead.”

“I did send some of my people to try and find him.” Thesan put in, and Elain was surprised that he was still there. She looked back up at him as he went on, “But it wasn’t our territory…”

“You didn’t find him.” Lucien said, and Thesan shook his head. 

“We will search again tomorrow, but I suspect that he is long gone.”

“Has… anyone sent word to the Autumn Court?” Lucien asked, “About Malak and Tallan?”

Glancing at Lucien’s face, Elain could read the worry there, and knew that he was thinking about his mother again. Thesan nodded. “Yes. We have not heard back.”

“Okay. Thank you.” Lucien let out a sigh and then sat up straighter. “Uh… The High Lord of the Night Court requests that-” Thesan held up a hand, and Lucien fell silent. 

“I know why you’re here. You and I shall speak about anything Rhys wants to know tomorrow morning.”

“Okay… And Elain is putting together a book of flowers from across Prythian. We request that she has the freedom to move around the court of her own volition…”

“She has it.”

“Also, if you have a favourite to recommend…” Elain began and Thesan smiled at her. 

“I think that will be easy enough.”

“Thank you…”

“Also,” Thesan said, his eyes going back to Lucien, “We have alerted the Night Court to the events of the day.” Elain’s breath caught at that. Nesta would blow up if she heard what had happened. “As Emissary to the Night Court we had to let your High Lord know what had occurred on the border and that we had taken care of you…”

“Of course.” Lucien said, “Yes, thank you.”

“If you would like to write your own letters, we can have them sent in the morning.”

“Yes.” Lucien said again.

“Alright…” Thesan’s eyes swept across the two of them before he smiled again. “I am glad that you are both well… I shall have the evening meal brought to the room for you. No need to venture out. Someone will alert you in the morning when it is time for breakfast.” He took a step back from the bed, still smiling. “I’ll leave you to… rest.”

Elain watched as he turned and strode elegantly from the room. “Why’d he say ‘rest’ like that?” she asked when the door closed and Lucien gave a low chuckle. 

“Because he knows we’re not going to rest.” He said, “At least, not yet.”

“Not yet?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at him and he grinned at her. 

“You did promise me a hot bath and a massage…” he reminded her and she nodded slowly, thinking back on the part of their day that had been pleasant, before Lucien’s brothers had found them. 

“So I did.” She replied. 

Lucien got to his feet, rolling off the side of the bed and he strode for a nearby door that Elain supposed belonged to the bathroom. A few moments later, she heard the tell-tale sounds of water running and figured she had been correct. “Are you coming to join me?” he asked, and she couldn’t help the wide smile that spread across her face. 

Gingerly, Elain pushed the covers of the soft bed back and got to her feet. She didn’t hurt anywhere, she discovered and she walked more confidently into the bathroom. 

By the time the tub was full of steaming water, Elain was more than a little keen to get into it. She knew that she had been washed when she had been brought to the Dawn Court, as the dirt that had been all over her from being dragged by Tallan was nowhere to be seen. Someone had taken care of that for her, but she wanted the sensation and the action of washing herself. She could still remember what it felt like to be pinned by him, to feel him against her, and it made her skin crawl. The hot water would fix that, she figured. She would wash him from her body and from her mind. 

Lucien had settled himself up one end of the tub, leaning back against it, one arm dangling over the edge as his russet and gold eyes watched her. “Come on, Petal.” He smiled, “Get in here…”

She walked around the tub to stand behind him, her hands trailing across his shoulders gently. “How am I meant to massage you from in there…?”

“I think…” he tilted his head to look up at her, “we will work it out…”

Smiling, Elain slid the shoulders of the thin slip she wore down her arms. She wondered vaguely who had put it on her, but forgot about that a moment later when Lucien reached a hand out to her to help her step into the tub. Sinking thankfully down into the hot water, she couldn’t help letting out a soft groan. Lucien didn’t release her hand then, but tugged her toward himself until she was practically lying on top of him. Her eyes closed as his hot hands encircled her waist and he began gently washing the water over her lower back. “Was this your plan?” she asked, resting her cheek against his chest as she surrendered comfortably. 

“Not so much a plan…” he murmured, and she could hear the rumble of his voice in his chest, “ as more of a fantasy…”

Elain laughed then, opening her eyes to look up at him. “I hope it meets expectation.”

“Oh, it’s getting there.”

“Well, you let me know if there’s anything I can do…” She’d said the words jokingly, but she felt the reaction from Lucien all the same. When he went to shift away so she wouldn’t notice, she braced herself against the side of the tub so that he couldn’t move. “Don’t even think about it.” She murmured, settling down again, “I just got comfortable.”

His hands were light on her back, but after a moment he began washing the hot water over her once more. “I…”

Resting her chin against his chest, Elain flicked her eyes up at his face. 

“I thought maybe… after today… you wouldn’t…” he hesitated.

“Don’t be a stupid male.” She smiled, “We’ve been over this. I want you touching me.” 

“You sure?”

“Absolutely.” She settled down again with her cheek flush against his skin. “It makes me forget anything else exists…”

When his hand slid down her back again, Elain smiled. Then, she looked back up at him, startled, when that hand slid lower to squeeze at her arse, and she was met with a wide toothy grin. 

“Is that the game you want to play?” she asked, and his grin only grew wider.


	97. Chapter Ninety-Seven

**Chapter 97**

Interest sparked in Elain’s eyes when Lucien squeezed her arse again. He held her gaze as she lifted her head a little, a smile spreading across her own face. “You like this game?” she asked. 

“Which game would that be?” he asked in return, both hands now on her arse, cupping her and pulling her a little higher up himself. Elain’s smile grew wider, her hands coming up to clasp at his shoulders as she sat higher, shifting herself to straddle him. “Petal…” Lucien’s blood began to heat in his veins at the sight of her on him like that, and his hands tightened a little more. 

“I want you to tell me…” she murmured, bringing her lips to his ear.

“Tell you what?” he breathed. He would tell her anything.

“Tell me what you want…”

“You.” He whispered, turning his head to press his lips to her throat. “I want you. Always.”

One of Elain’s arms snaked around the back of his neck as she pressed herself to his chest again, her lips against his jaw. She kissed him again and again moving slowly along his jaw before up to press her lips to his, and Lucien knew that he was well and truly hard. He was uncomfortable, pressed against her arse the way that he was, but he dare not move, or attempt to shift her. 

He wanted to claim her; that was what he wanted. But, after what had happened earlier, he knew that he had to leash that desire. She had so nearly been hurt beyond what even the most skilled healer could have done to help. Even now, he suspected, that while she was physically okay, the memories would linger. Lucien did not want to trigger anything like that and so decided that this would be something she would have to instigate. He wanted to claim her, after seeing Tallan pinning her in the dirt, having to watch his brother’s hands on his mate, Lucien wanted her all to himself. He wanted to claim her, to prove that she was his and only his. But he would not.

Elain’s hand slipped down between them, and Lucien jumped a little when he felt her wrap her hand around him, sliding smoothly over him. “Ohh…” he couldn’t help a small groan, before biting his lip to silence himself. 

Brown eyes met his as she lifted her head and Lucien held her gaze as she lifted herself onto her knees. “You want this?” she asked, and he could do nothing but nod. “Why?” she asked, and he bit back another groan when he felt her position him at just the right spot, but then hold herself there, just too high. He could have pulled her down onto himself, he knew that. He could also have pushed up into her. But, he didn’t.

Swallowing, Lucien tried to make his throat work. “Mine…” the word was barely a whisper.

Elain smiled at that. “Yes…”

He couldn’t help his hands going to her hips. He would have a good hold on her with his hands like that. Looking down, he felt himself tremble with the effort it took to not take control. It would be only too easy to close that small space between them, to sink into her until he could go no further. “Petal…” that sounded like a whimper, but Lucien didn’t care. 

“Yes, Lucien…” She had leaned to brush her lips against his ear again, “I want to savour this…” His eyes slid closed when she sank just a little lower, “The feel of you inside me…”

“Yes…”

“Only you…” she breathed, “You make everything else disappear…”

Lucien understood what she required from him then. “Yes, Elain…” he breathed, his fingers tracing her soft skin, moving over her hips. “Anything you need.” He turned his head to meet her lips and, as she kissed him, she sank completely onto him and he groaned into the kiss, unable to help himself. Elain gasped and her hand tightened on his shoulder for a moment. Lucien just watched her as she gasped again, tilting her head back as she looked toward the ceiling as she went still. “Petal?” Lucien lifted one of his hands, settling it carefully at the base of her long and exposed throat, his fingers moving gently over her soft skin, before he allowed himself to trace it lower down, over her breasts, and into the hot water. 

She moved then, slowly, carefully, and Lucien’s eyes flicked back to her face, watching her expressions, the way she gasped again before biting her lower lip as a soft sound escaped her. He shifted both hands back to her hips, helping to lift her, and keep her movements even as the water rolled around them, rising up the sides of the tub as Elain reached a hand out to grab the edge, using her grip to support herself as she continued to move on him. Lucien’s blood quickened as he listened to her, small gasps and cries falling from her lips before she bent to kiss him again, her hips still rolling to take him deeper again and again. 

“Lucien…” Elain’s murmur sent goosebumps rising across his skin and he lifted his eyes to meet hers, dark with desire as she looked at him. “What do you want…?”

His brain wasn’t working, and his hands continued to move over her. “What?” he asked, stroking her gently, “This… you…”

“More…” she murmured, her eyes on his face, “You want something else…” He couldn’t keep his hands still, and they continued to wander over her as he tried to think. “I can feel it…”

Lucien shook his head. “No…”

Her hips moved again and he groaned, “Yes…” She breathed, her wet hand coming to his cheek, fingers tracing his scar. “Tell me…”

Groaning again, he tried to fight back the words, but Elain apparently knew exactly what she was doing, her eyes on his face as she rocked herself against him. He tried to think, tried to sort through everything going through his mind, and then a flash of memory. Elain on her back in the dirt, ruined dress practically ripped off of her, and Tallan’s hands on her skin…

“Mine…” he growled, his own hands tightening on her. 

“Yes…” Elain breathed, nodding as her hips slowed, “…show me.”

Lucien forced himself to think then. He didn’t want to lose control. It had nearly happened twice before. The first time had been in Rhys’ kitchen when Elain had walked in on him in the dark and he had been able to scent her arousal. He’d picked her up and held her on the bench, and the only way he had been able to leash himself was to cling to the knowledge that she had been a virgin and nobody else had touched her. That had been enough to enable him to maintain enough control to do nothing but hold her. The second time, they had been in Autumn and she had fallen asleep on him. He had been unable to make himself get up and move to sleep on the couch, but he had managed to keep his hands to himself because he finally had her in his arms. All night he had enjoyed that closeness, and the fact that she had trusted him enough to sleep there. He had only ever kissed her at that point and, just like in the kitchen, he had held on to her innocence, clutched at it, as a leash for his own desires. As possessiveness swirled in him at the thought of his brother’s hands on her, Lucien knew that the old leash he had used would be useless.

Elain must have read his thoughts, or sensed them somehow down the bond, because both of her hands came up to his face as she met his gaze. Her dark eyes seemed lit from within, and he could read the need in her expression. Lucien watched as Elain’s pink tongue slowly traced her lower lip before she spoke, her voice breathy. “I…” her eyes flicked back and forth across his face, “ …want it.”

Swallowing thickly, Lucien felt himself slipping. “You know what I want?” he asked, his own voice a low growl. Elain just nodded. “Then let me show you.” An instant later Lucien had stood up, lifting Elain in his arms as he did so. He stepped out of the tub and carried her back into the bedroom, not even bothering to pick up a towel. Striding to the bed, he dropped Elain onto the covers, still wet. She pushed herself up onto her elbows, sliding back further into the centre of the bed, and then he was on her.


	98. Chapter Ninety-Eight

**Chapter 98**

A gasp of surprise escaped Elain when her back hit the bedcovers. Pushing herself further up the bed, she watched Lucien as he moved toward her, crawling over her, his eyes locked onto hers. When his wet skin met hers, Elain gasped again, her hands sliding across his shoulders as he pressed himself to her. He adjusted himself over her, and Elain felt both of his large hands move down her sides to her thighs, where he gripped her tightly. Allowing him to settle between her legs as he pulled them apart, Elain slid one of her hands up into Lucien’s damp hair at the back of his neck, holding his gaze and watching his expression as she felt him tighten his grip on her thighs, holding her open.

****

There was no question in his eyes, no moment of hesitation, before he pushed into her in one fluid stroke. Elain clutched at him, her eyes still meeting his as she opened her mouth to gasp, but no sound came out. Lucien withdrew and thrust again, his hands still holding her thighs firmly and his eyes never leaving hers. This time a small sound escaped Elain and her hands slid over his broad back, her fingers tracing the strong muscles moving beneath his skin. The look in his eyes was possessive and, as he released her thighs and instead took hold of her shoulders, his hands were possessive. Elain clung to him, managing to hook her legs around behind him before he thrust again. One of his hands went up into her hair where he took a firm grip, grunting as he continued his movement, his rhythm fast and smooth. 

Within moments, Elain was breathless. She could feel the desire driving him, knew what he was doing when his hand slid from her shoulder down her arm where he took hold of her wrist before bringing it up above her head and pinning it to the bed covers. She knew why he began to growl, deep within himself, as his hands tightened on her and he pushed harder. The one hand she still had on him, she kept gentle and slid to the back of his neck. He was panting then and finally broke eye contact to lower his head and press his face into her hair, his breath hot on her throat as he maintained his rhythm. 

Trying to bite back her own soft whimpering, Elain listened to Lucien’s insistent growl as she moved her fingers through his hair, stroking the back of his neck. She felt his own hand move through her hair until he lay his hand gently against her head and his growl seemed to deepen. She noticed then, when his growl seemed to change and, a few moment later, she realised that it had become a word. Over and over Lucien was repeating the same word, growling it, panting it, into her ear with each thrust he made into her body. “Mine… Mine… Mine…”

Heat flared directly between Elain’s legs, and she felt herself become even more wet at that claim. “I am…” she breathed, twisting her fingers into his hair again. The hand he had been using to pin her wrist above her head slid back down to clutch at one of her breasts and Elain’s eyes closed. She knew that he was tracing every part of her that Tallan had touched, claiming it again for himself, and she tightened herself around him in response.

“Mine… Mine…”

“Yes.” Elain tilted her head back, arching a little beneath him, and Lucien’s lips went immediately to her exposed throat. “Ah…”

He licked at her and Elain shuddered a little when she felt his teeth scrape against her skin. His fingertips skimmed down the side of her face and quickly down her body before she felt his hand slide down her thigh, hooking behind one of her knees and hoisting it higher around himself. Russet and gold eyes met hers again when Lucien lifted his head to look at her. “Tell me you’re mine…” he panted, and Elain slid her hand around to his cheek, meeting his gaze as his stunning hair fell over her in a sheer curtain. She brushed it aside, tucking it back behind his ear as she nodded. 

“Yes…” she breathed, her fingers tracing his scar again. She had told him that she wanted this, knowing exactly what he had wanted to do. She had known that he wanted to claim her as his own, and she wanted to be his. He made her feel safe, and being his made her feel safe. “I am yours…”

“Only me…” he breathed, kissing her then and Elain tightened her legs around him. 

“Yes…” She murmured into the kiss, one of her hands going again to his back, tracing the hard muscle she felt there. “Only you…” She felt the effect those words had on him when relief began to meet her down the bond. The soft growl that had been coming out of him faded and his lips curved into a smile as he continued to move over her, his eyes seemingly trying to take in every detail of her face.

“I can feel that you are…” he whispered, “Mine…”

“I am.” This went two ways however. “And you’re mine…” Lucien’s grin twisted and his fingers trailed up her thigh, stroking her skin as he thrust into her again. Elain gasped, her hand clutching at his shoulder.

“Most certainly…” his eyes moved over her face, “So what would you have from me…?”

“Everything.”

Lucien’s metallic eye whirred as he looked at her and, after a moment, he nodded. Elain felt the bond tugging at her and she tried lifting her hips to meet each of Lucien’s thrusts when his hands tightened on her again. “All… yours…” he breathed, watching her. Elain’s hands found their way back into his hair, and she tugged him down to kiss him, groaning when he rolled his hips, pushing deeper into her. Breaking the kiss, Elain gasped, her hands clenching in his hair. 

Pressing her lips to his shoulder, she tried to focus on breathing. Lucien’s hands had become possessive on her again, but in a way that was different than earlier. His touch now indicated that he knew he could, and a level of comfort with which someone touched their own body, and it made Elain burn. He had well and truly claimed her, and she wanted to do the same. Without thinking, Elain sank her teeth into Lucien’s shoulder, eliciting a surprised grunt from him.

“Ah, Petal…” his tone was questioning as his lips moved against her throat and Elain turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek.

“Mine.” She grinned.

His hand went to her throat then, and she heard him chuckle. “If that’s how you want to play it…”

“Yes…” She lifted one of her hands to his face again, but he caught it with his own and laced his fingers through hers before pinning it beside her head. She just looked up at him, watching as he surveyed her, a smile twisting his lips again. Then, with one hand at her throat, and the other pinning her own hand by her head, Lucien began to move more quickly. 

He wasn’t gentle but he was thorough and, before long, Elain could hear herself letting out one loud cry after another. Her free hand clutched at Lucien’s back as she alternated between scratching at him while calling his name, and softly murmuring encouragement for him to keep going. When she managed to bite back her next cry, she could hear Lucien’s breathing shift, and a low groan escaped him. 

Smoothing her hand more gently over his back, Elain felt him press his lips to her throat, grunting as he quickened his pace. 

“Lucien…” All she had been able to manage was a breathy whimper, and Lucien released his hold on her to clench, instead, handfuls of the bedspread. As he moved over her, Elain felt heat flush through her when he shifted his angle. She knew she didn’t want to wait until they returned to the Night Court to accept the bond. She had realised that when Lucien’s brothers had attacked them, and she knew it now. She did not want something else to happen to them, and to never have properly been Lucien’s mate. She wanted them to belong to each other as fully, as completely as they were able. “Look at me…” she gasped, sliding her hand up Lucien’s arm to his shoulder, “Look at me…” 

The moment Lucien’s russet and gold eyes met hers, Elain felt the tug of the bond again. When he brought one of his hands gently to her cheek, holding her eyes as he continued to move over her, inside of her, Elain felt herself inching toward her edge. She whimpered softly and his fingers traced her cheekbone before he shifted his hips again and Elain fell with a loud cry. She allowed herself a scream as she came, harder than she ever had before, only vaguely aware that Lucien kept going until he followed her several moments later.

By the time she could think again, Elain found herself curled around Lucien. He lay beside her, one arm around her waist while she rested her cheek against his shoulder. Bringing her hand up, she traced her fingers across the red bitemark she had given him, looking up when he glanced at her. “Sorry…” she murmured, “Does it hurt?”

Lucien gave her a lazy arrogant smile. “No…” he shook his head, “Besides,” he smirked, “as I am yours, you can do as you wish with me…”

Elain made a face at him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Relax, Petal.” He tapped a finger to the tip of her nose. “It doesn’t hurt.” She watched as he looked down at it again, “And I kind of like it…”

“Why?”

His eyes flicked up to meet hers again, that metallic eye clicking and whirring. “It’s proof that I’m yours.”

Smiling, Elain looked again at the bitemark. It was, she thought, a perfect indicator that she had claimed him for her own. Running her finger over it again, she nodded. “Good…” she murmured, “Let me know when it fades so I can give you a new one.”

Lucien chuckled again, pulling her tighter into himself and flipping one side of the bedspread over them. “I’ll be sure to do that.”


	99. Chapter Ninety-Nine

**Chapter 99**

They awoke late the next morning. Elain supposed that they had both needed the rest and, as Lucien slid off the bed and to his feet, she pushed herself up, shaking her hair back as she did so. “I need another bath.” She murmured, able to feel the remnants of last night between her thighs.

“I’ll heat some water.” Lucien replied as he strode, naked, for the bathroom. Elain watched him appreciatively. He really was the finest male she had ever seen. Hurriedly, she got to her feet and grabbed a robe before following him. 

By the time she had gotten to the bathroom, he had filled the tub with fresh water and was using his own fire ability to heat it. “I still owe you a massage…”

Looking at her over his shoulder, Lucien grinned. “So you do…”

“If you get into the bath,” she began, “…we have time…”

“We did probably sleep through breakfast. It happens early around here…”

“Didn’t Thesan say he’d send someone to let us know when it was time?”

“I’d wager we slept through that…”

“Oh…” Elain’s eyes followed Lucien as he stepped into the water and sank down to lean back against the edge. She moved toward the tub, pleased that she got to touch him. She smiled as she bent to dip her hands into the hot water, warming them before she slid them across Lucien’s shoulders, smoothing across his skin. “Have you always been this attractive…?” she asked, her eyes taking in his broad shoulders with appreciation.

Lucien laughed and tilted his head back, leaning against the edge of the tub as he looked up at her, “Rather more so…” he said, lifting his own hand to his face and indicating the scar running from brow to jaw. Bending to him, Elain pressed a kiss to his forehead. 

“I like you as you are now.” She murmured, kneading her hands into his shoulders, rubbing at his neck. Lucien’s eyes closed and he smiled. She could feel the pleasure reaching her down the bond, and she heard his soft sigh. “When was the last time you had a massage?” she asked, using her knuckles on a hard knot she could feel beneath his skin. 

“I…” Lucien shook his head, “I don’t know…”

“Well, I don’t really know what I’m doing…” Elain admitted, running her hands across his shoulders again. She just really liked touching him, if she were honest with herself. 

“You’re doing a great job.” He murmured, and she could hear the honesty in his words.

“Maybe I’ll have to do it more often for you…” She slid her hands forward, going down his chest.

“I would like that…”

“As would I…” she whispered in his ear, bringing her hands back to his shoulders and beginning to work her way up his neck. “I do enjoy the opportunity to get my hands on such a fine body…”

Lucien laughed again and Elain smiled when one of his hands reached back up to her. “A fine body?” he asked, and Elain nodded. 

“Mhmmm… strong, broad shoulders…” she murmured, running her hands across them, “Beautiful skin,” she ran her hands back down his chest and into the water, “Firm, muscled body…”

“Is this massage for me or for you?” she could hear the grin in his voice and she turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek. 

“For both of us.” She replied, smiling. 

“Well, you’ve relaxed me…” he looked around at her, “If you want to get in here, I’ll see about getting us something to eat…”

“Oh?” she asked, “You’re just going to leave me here all alone…?”

Lucien raised an eyebrow at her. “Petal, if I don’t practice some self-restraint, we’d never leave this room again.”

Elain untied her robe and Lucien’s eyes were trained on her, even as he got to his feet and reached for a towel. “…it is a nice room…”

“Aren’t you hungry?” he asked, grinning again as he looked at her. Elain had to admit that she was. They hadn’t eaten the dinner Thesan had sent to them last night. Nodding, she tried to ignore the rumble in her stomach produced just by the thought of food. She knew that Lucien had heard anyway when he stepped out of the tub and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, leaning in to press his lips to her cheek before he moved away. “I’ll find out where we can get some lunch.” He said and Elain nodded again as she sank down into the hot water.

She hadn’t needed a long soak, just enough time to wash the dried sweat from her skin and to clean herself up with one of the soft washcloths, and then she was ready to get out. When she walked back into the bedroom, Lucien was returning from out in the hallway, and she didn’t miss the way both of his eyes moved over her, that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he took her in. Pretending that she hadn’t noticed, Elain set about pulling together what she would need to get dressed and lay it all out on the bed.

“There is about to be a small lunch served in the dining hall nearby…”

“Is there?” she glanced over her shoulder. 

“Yes, we can head down there when you’re ready.”

“Sounds good…” she dropped her towel and smiled to herself when Lucien’s reaction reached her down the bond without her having to turn around and look at him to know what it was. Slowly, she pulled her dress on and began fastening it before she turned to look at him. “Will there be many there?”

“I don’t think so. Most are out and about during the day… it will only be a few of us.”

“Lovely.” She picked up her small book and made sure she had a pencil to tuck into her pocket with it. The Dawn Court seemed lovely so far, even though all she had seen of it was this room and what she had glimpsed from the nearby window, but she wanted to get their jobs done as soon as possible to be able to move on. “Will Thesan be there, do you know?”

“I’m not sure.”

“He did say he would speak with you today…”

“He did.”

Moving to a mirror on the wall, Elain began braiding her hair up into a reasonable looking style and then turned to look at Lucien. He smiled at her, getting to his feet from where he had been waiting on a couch. “Okay, I am presentable.”

“You would be presentable in a sack.” He told her, winking in a way he clearly thought was charming. 

Making a face at the thought, Elain moved toward him and the door. “I hope that never needs to be the case.”

“If it is,” he told her, pushing the door open and holding it for her to walk ahead of him, “I shall give you my clothes and I will go naked…”

Spinning around to look at Lucien as she walked backwards up the hallway, Elain laughed. “Oh, I’m liking this scenario more by the minute…”

“What’s not to like?” he asked, gesturing at himself. 

Elain reached out and took his hand, smiling up at him as they continued up the hallway. Lucien pushed open the door to the dining hall and Elain followed him in. 

“Lucien!” A female faerie with long dark hair turned toward them, a smile on her pretty face. “I had heard that you were here.”

“You tend to hear most things.” There was affection in Lucien’s voice and Elain glanced up at him before he strode toward the beautiful faerie with pretty onyx eyes. She watched as Lucien bent to hug the faerie, trying to choke back the sudden flare of jealousy within her. An instant later Elain raised an eyebrow when the faerie wrapped a mechanical hand up and around Lucien in response to his embrace.


	100. Chapter One Hundred

**Chapter 100**

Her pulse quickening in her veins, Elain tried to force herself to calm down. If that female did not get her hands, mechanical or otherwise, off of _her_ Lucien immediately, she was going to march over there and make her. She didn’t know how she was going to do it, but she had a few ideas. Pretty female laughter had Elain surging forward, her eyes locked on where those slender golden arms were wrapped tightly around Lucien’s neck, and she was just picturing throwing herself at the dark haired faerie when Lucien turned his head to look at her. His wide eyes told Elain that he knew exactly what she was thinking, and then he had straightened, taking himself out of those delicate arms. “Petal…” he smiled at Elain, holding a hand out to her, and Elain took it quickly, possessively. “I’d like you to meet Nuan.”

Nuan. Elain’s eyes moved over the faerie, noting the gorgeous dark hair and slightly upturned eyes. She looked rather like Amren, really. “Hello…” Elain tried to keep her face neutral, not trusting her expression to be polite when jealousy was still pumping through her veins. She took in the mechanical hand again, and then something clicked in her brain. Looking up at Lucien she focused on his metallic eye, before looking back to Nuan. 

“Yes, that was me.” Pretty lips curved into a satisfied smile and Elain just about gasped.

“You made…”

“Yes.”

Elain looked back up, intending to have another look at Lucien’s eye, only to find his free hand reaching out to take hold of her chin. She just watched him as he bent and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, and she knew it was entirely to help ease the tension still within her. His eyes met hers when he lifted his head, and Elain knew that he’d deliberately just claimed her, in front of Nuan, while also announcing that he was hers. “Nuan,” he said lightly, his eyes still on Elain’s, “This is my mate, Elain Archeron.” He looked then toward the other female and, when Elain also turned her eyes on her, she found herself much more at ease. She knew beyond doubt that Lucien had just done that entirely for her benefit, and it made her squeeze his hand more tightly. 

“I did hear that you had a Mate…” Nuan’s black eyes flicked to Elain, moving over her quickly. Elain was surprised when a smile met her then. “I also heard that Elain Archeron is a Seer.”

“Somewhat.” Elain said, and Nuan smiled again at her.

Onyx eyes returned to Lucien and Nuan looked up at him. “After lunch, I would really like to take a look at that eye. It has been a long time since I’ve been able to properly get at it…”

“Yes, that mask was more than a little inconvenient…” Lucien muttered, “In a multitude of different situations…”

“I’ll just bet it was.” Nuan turned and seated herself at the long table as several faeries entered the room carrying various trays. 

Lucien pulled a chair out, and gestured for Elain to claim it. She sat and he pushed it in, before taking a seat beside her. “She made your eye…” Her voice was low and Lucien smiled at her, nodding. 

“She’s a talented… tinkerer.”

“Talented doesn’t cover it.” Nuan said, glancing their way as dishes were set down before them. Lucien smiled more widely.

“I would have to agree.” 

Elain noticed Lucien watching her, to see where her eyes were directed, before he leaned to pick up the dish she had focused upon from further up the table and he passed it to her. She gave him a flash of a smile before dishing some of the fantastic looking salad onto her plate. 

As Thesan strode into the room, faeries scrambled to make sure that he had ample selection of a variety of dishes within reach from his seat at the end of the table. His brown eyes settled on Lucien the moment he was seated however, and he smiled. 

“Did you both sleep well?”

“Yes, we did.” Lucien nodded, his hand coming to rest on Elain’s knee beneath the table. She glanced at him before looking again at Thesan.

“I thought you must have when you didn’t appear for breakfast. I did send someone to let you know, but apparently there was no answer…” Thesan’s tone was gentle, his voice rich, and Elain found him incredibly soothing to listen to.

“We didn’t hear a thing.” Lucien’s own tone was soft, and Elain knew that he was trying to sound innocent.

“You did go through quite an ordeal.” Thesan conceded, before lifting his fork to his lips. Lucien nodded, his hand sliding slowly up Elain’s thigh. Glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, Elain held her breath, wondering what he was doing. After a moment, the High Lord spoke again. “I’m sure that Nuan has you ready to submit to her ministrations… but afterwards, if you would like to discuss the progress of the court and any news that might be of interest to the others…”

“Yes, that would be excellent.” Lucien nodded, and Elain’s gaze slid toward the nearby window. When he left to speak with Thesan, she figured she would head outside to see if she could find any flowers that would be suitable for what she wanted. There had seemed to be quite a bit of agricultural action out there when she had caught a glimpse of the countryside passing a window earlier. No doubt there would be endless choice out there.

When Lucien got to his feet at the end of their meal, Elain did the same. There was no way that she was not going with him for whatever Nuan wanted to do. The jealousy had faded, and she no longer felt like throwing herself at the dark haired faerie, but that didn’t mean that she was okay with letting the tinkerer disappear with her mate. Lucien wrapped an arm around Elain’s shoulders as they followed Nuan out into the hallway, and Elain leaned into him comfortably. 

“You don’t have to be jealous.” Lucien’s lips brushed Elain’s ear as he whispered to her and she glanced up at him.

“Sorry…” she murmured, “I couldn’t help it.”

“I know, I’m just letting you know.” He pressed his lips to her cheek. “She was only ever a friend.” 

Slipping an arm around Lucien, Elain smiled. “Thank you.” She liked that he was seeking to reassure her, and making it clear to her that there was no cause to the feeling she had absolutely no control over. Wondering if this would still be the way of it when she had accepted the bond, Elain smiled again when he tucked her in tightly to his side. “I don’t think I want to wait.” She said, and Lucien’s large hand moved up and down her arm as he waited for her to continue. 

“Wait for what?” he asked when she said nothing more. 

“I don’t want to wait until we go back to the Night Court.”

His hand froze on her arm and then lifted to her chin, tilting her face up so that he could meet her eyes. “To accept the bond?”

“Yes.” She said simply. So many emotions hit Elain down the bond then, and she didn’t know where to begin in trying to sort them out. Two stood out to her, however, and that was enough for her to get the general idea. Longing and joy.

Lucien stopped walking, right in the middle of the hallway, and pulled Elain around to face him. She gave a small gasp of surprise but then both of his hands had come up to take her face carefully between them. She met his eyes for only a moment before he kissed her, his hands holding her gently. One remained at her cheek, his thumb caressing her cheekbone slowly, while the other dropped to her shoulder and made its way lightly down her arm before jumping to her waist, and drawing her closer. 

Wrapping her own arms around Lucien’s neck, she leaned into him, against his chest as she allowed him to deepen the kiss. She didn’t know when she would do it, she hadn’t thought that far ahead, but she had meant what she had said. She didn’t wait to wait until they returned to the Night Court. That was entirely too far away. 

A small cough from further up the hall reminded Elain that Nuan was waiting for them, and had likely just been given an eyeful when she had turned to find that she was no longer being followed. Lucien didn’t seem to mind, however, and kissed Elain again before finally releasing her. There was a grin on his face, and heat in his eyes, as he regarded her. “Well, Petal.” He murmured, “Isn’t that interesting…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100 Chapters!   
> 100 Days of posting consecutively.   
> This is a first for me. YAY!
> 
> I love everyone who has gotten this far and is still here and enjoying the story. You are honestly what has motivated me to keep going at this pace. You've kept me accountable. xx


	101. Chapter One Hundred and One

**Chapter 101**

Lucien’s blood hummed in his veins when he took Elain’s hand again, holding it carefully in his own, and headed after Nuan again up the hallway. It pleased him beyond anything he had ever known, that she wanted to accept the bond, accept him, officially, as her mate. And she didn’t want to wait!

What did that mean? When was she thinking of doing it? Originally she had said that it would happen when they get back to the Night Court, and that had made sense to him. They had safety and comfort there, and they had places they could go for time and space to themselves. He wondered briefly what Thesan would think about them doing it here? It would be a bit of an imposition upon their host to lock themselves in their room to engage themselves in the frenzy when it hit. What if somebody happened to interrupt them and got killed? Lucien wasn’t sure he wouldn’t be able to murder anyone who walked in on him when he finally had Elain in his arms as his Mate.

His thoughts were interrupted when Nuan pushed open the door to her workroom and ushered them inside. A quick glance around the place told him it looked much as it had every other time he had seen it.

“Please sit down on that chair and don’t touch anything.” Nuan’s voice was firm as she went to a nearby cabinet and began opening doors and drawers. Lucien grinned, slanting a glance at Elain, as he moved to do as he was told. Elain followed him across the room and stood beside him, her own dark eyes moving around the room. 

“Have you… made everything in here?” his mate’s gaze flicked to Nuan who closed a drawer and moved closer. 

“Pretty much.”

Elain began walking around the room, looking at various half-constructed creations, while Lucien watched her. Nuan fiddled with something on a nearby bench before coming to stand before him. “Look at me.” She said, finger tapping his cheek. He flicked his eyes toward her and she grasped his chin, tilting his head back so that she could look at his mechanical eye. “How has it been functioning?” she asked, and Lucien went to nod before realising that he couldn’t.

“It’s just as good as the day you put it in.” he replied, unable to help his gaze siding back to Elain when her shadow passed by him.

“Look at me.” Nuan tapped his cheek again, “You don’t need to watch Elain. She’s right there. She’s not going to run away…”

“Okay, okay…” he muttered, “There have been no problems with the eye…”

“And it’s still comfortable?”

“Yes.”

Nuan’s clever eyes were inspecting him, and he just tried to sit still and do what she needed. He answered any questions that she asked him, all while tracking Elain’s progress around the room out of his periphery. 

*

This faerie was clever. Elain had known that before they entered Nuan’s workroom, but now, as she saw the complexity and ingenuity of what the other female had been working on, it was even more clear. Elain would have put money on Nuan being the absolutely cleverest being that she had ever met. She continued to wander around the workroom, listening as Lucien answered his friend’s questions about the metallic eye. Elain had never really considered the fact that the eye may have required maintenance, and she was glad that all of his responses seemed to indicate that it was working just fine and nothing had gone wrong with it.

“Lucien… focus…” Nuan’s voice held patience, but Elain could hear another edge to it. “Look at me.”

“Sorry…” his reply was a huff.

Knowing that Lucien was still trying to look at her, Elain moved across the room to come and stand behind him. She lifted a hand, laying it gently on his shoulder, and gasped when her vision blurred and her ears began to ring.

_Tamlin practically carried Lucien through the door. It was this room, Elain realised as she watched. Lucien’s face was half covered in bandages and she wanted to go to him, noticing the way that he was sagging and barely able to walk, even with Tamlin’s help. Nuan suddenly appeared behind them, striding quickly as she pulled her long dark hair up into a ponytail._

_“Put him on the table.”_

_Tamlin moved to help Lucien up, and Elain moved closer, wanting to see what was about to happen. This was after Amarantha had ripped Lucien’s eye out, she figured. She had been shown a vision of when that happened when she and Lucien had been in the Autumn Court the first time. She hadn’t known what had happened after the vision had ended with Lucien screaming on the floor and Amarantha standing over him and cackling. He had been returned to Tamlin, she supposed. As emissary for the Spring Court, he would have been Tamlin’s responsibility._

_“How long?” Nuan asked, and Tamlin made a face._

_“A day…”_

_“Has the bleeding stopped?”_

_“Mostly.” The blond ran a hand over his handsome face, “He asked for you…”_

_“Mhm…” Nuan began undoing Lucien’s bandages._

_“He said you could help…”_

_“I have an idea…” Nuan muttered, she carefully removed a large cotton pad, and Elain flinched at Lucien’s pained groan. “As long as he was lucky… I might be able to…”_

_“Do I look lucky?” Lucien’s voice cracked, but Nuan’s lips twitched in a smile._

_“You’ve looked worse.” She replied, “I’ve seen you after a swim, looking like some kind of drowned goblin…” Lucien made an indignant sound, but it ended in a soft whimper and Nuan rolled up her sleeves. “Tamlin, I’m going to give you a list of things that I need you to get for me…”_

_“Okay.”_

_Elain moved to stand beside the table that Lucien was laying on, and she tried to touch his arm, but her hand passed right through him. Instead, she watched as Nuan inspected his wound and declared that he was lucky indeed. The tinkerer then softly explained to Lucien that she could make him a very special eye by way of replacement for the one that he had lost.  
One of Lucien’s hands had lifted, shaking, into the air and toward Nuan who had taken it with one of her own. “Thank you.” He breathed._

_“Of course.” She replied gently, turning to take several instruments from Tamlin as he came to her side._

_Elain’s eyes slid back to Lucien, and she frowned at the pained look on his raw and bloodied face. When he let out a small sob, she reached out again, wanting to touch him, and knowing that she couldn’t._

_“Does he need to be awake for this?” Tamlin asked, and Nuan shook her head._

_“No, it would be better if he was not.” Onyx eyes flickered to Lucien, “When you wake up, Lucien,” she told him, “I will have sorted this out…”_

_Tamlin moved toward the table and Lucien, and then Elain’s vision blurred.  
_

“Elain?” Lucien was frowning at her and Elain blinked as she tried to focus. His hands had hold of her elbows and he drew her closer, “What did you see?”

“I…” she was put into a chair and only then noticed Nuan watching her carefully. “I…” she looked back to Lucien and lifted a hand to his cheek, tracing his scar gently. It really had healed well considering the mess that his face had been when it was fresh. “I saw Tamlin bring you here…” she told him, “When this…” her fingers moved down his face again, “When this was new…”

“Fascinating…” Nuan’s voice was soft and Elain looked at her again. 

“I heard you say he was lucky…”

“I did.” Nuan agreed. “If there was more damage then I don’t think the eye would have been effective or been able to work the way that it does.”

Elain looked at Lucien once again. “You knew she could help…”

“I hoped so.”

“Maybe you are lucky.” She let her hand slid back into his vibrant hair and he leaned forward to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“My luck does seem to be turning that way.” He murmured.


	102. Chapter One Hundred and Two

**Chapter 102**

The messenger that Thesan had sent for Lucien had informed him that the High Lord would like to speak to him out by the granaries, and Lucien was more than a little sure that he had gotten lost. The sun was beating down, with more heat than he would have expected for mid-afternoon, and he loosened his shirt just a little as he approached a nearby open granary.

As he walked through the door, Lucien caught sight of Thesan nearby. The High Lord was smiling at another male and, at the sight of their intimate stance, Lucien’s steps faltered. There was a flutter of white feathers, and then Thesan turned to face Lucien, alone. 

“I apologise,” Lucien murmured, “I… didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“No, I didn’t realise that it was time for us to meet…”

“He… didn’t have to… leave…”

“Oh, ah… things to do.” Thesan flashed a smile, but it faded and Lucien wondered if the High Lord wasn’t nervous. A second later he realised that Thesan wasn’t nervous, he was being cautious. It made sense as relationships like theirs weren’t completely accepted across all the different courts, and Thesan didn’t really know him all that well personally. He shouldn’t have to be cautious, Lucien thought. Especially not in in his own court.

“Oh…” Lucien sought for something to say to put him at ease, “Y’know… Connal… I think, has the same… inclination…”

Thesan raised an eyebrow, tilting his head. “I did not know that.”

“Yeah…”

“I can’t imagine Beron was accepting of that.”

“As far as I’m aware he never noticed.”

Thesan nodded slowly and then turned to wave an arm around the granary. “What was it that Rhys would like us to update one another on?”

Lucien pulled his book from his jacket as his eyes moved around the room. “Progress and changes.” He replied, “Any ideas you have for the future.”

“Okay… would you like to take a walk?”

“Sure.” Lucien followed Thesan outside and back into the sun. “It sure seems as if everything here is running smoothly.”

“We are fortunate.”

*

Smiling at the faerie who handed her the letter, Elain moved toward the window as she unfolded it. She recognised Nesta’s handwriting and drew a deep breath before she began to read.

_Elain,_

_Do you need me to come to the Dawn Court?_

_Rhys told us what happened to you and Lucien at the border, and that two of his brothers were killed. He said that you are in the Dawn Court and that you are safe, but if you need me to come and get you, I will. I want to hear it from you directly. Cassian has said that he will take me right to you._

_Please let me know how you are as soon as you get this. I don’t want to hear it through anyone else. I hope that you are well, and that you will be back soon regardless. I need someone to talk to who isn’t a silly Illyrian or part of some sickly obsessive mated couple._

_I hope you are okay. Lucien, too. Did he kill his own brothers?_

_Miss you._

_Ness.  
_

Biting her lip, Elain turned to rummage through her pack in order to reply. She could tell that Nesta was worried, while trying to pretend that she wasn’t going out of her mind. There was no doubt in her mind that Rhys would have informed them all of exactly what had happened, but she understood the need to hear it from her sister herself. If their roles had been reversed, Elain knew that she wouldn’t have been able to rest easy until she had heard directly from Nesta.

She set everything out on the small writing desk by the window and then she set out getting her reply down.

_Ness,_

_I am okay._

_Lucien and I are both fine._

_As I am sure Rhys has told you, three of Lucien’s brothers attacked us by the border, and Lucien killed two of them to protect us. The third has disappeared._

_We were well cared for by Thesan and his Court, and things here are as normal as one would predict. While I do miss you, I do not need you to come to get me. I shall see you when I return to the Night Court. It shouldn’t be too long now, as we only have the Day Court to visit before our trip is complete._

_I cannot believe you only have two options for conversation. Cassian isn’t entirely silly, and I know that Feyre can hold a conversation about something other than Rhys. For a few minutes anyway. I do know that you can talk to Amren. You also have the option to speak with Mor and Azriel. You could also go out to Velaris and make some new friends._

_If I do need you to come, you know that I will send word._

_I do want to speak with you about my decision to accept the Mating Bond between myself and Lucien, however. I have decided to do it, and I want to do it soon. Maybe then you will grow tired of my conversation if I become anything like Feyre…_

_Do you have any similar news for me? Any progress that you would like to let me know about? Do tell me what has been going on at the Night Court lately. I feel a bit out of the loop._

_I really do think that you should visit some of the other courts. You would find them most interesting, and they are all uniquely beautiful. I think you would especially like the Winter Court. I would also like to go back, so maybe we can go together after I return._

_I miss you too._

_Elain.  
_

With a sigh, Elain leaned back in her chair and stretched. She then folded the letter up and hurried for the door. If she got it sent soon enough then her sister would receive it before dark. She knew that Nesta wasn’t going to sleep though the night if she hadn’t had a reply to her questions and knew that Elain was okay. 

After she had given her letter to the appropriate faerie, Elain nearly ran into Nuan in the hallway on her way back to her room. 

“Elain, are you in a hurry?”

“Oh, no…” Elain shook her head, her eyes moving over the other female. She had decided that she liked Nuan. Lucien obviously thought highly of her, and that spoke volumes. Also, after what she had seen in her vision, Elain realised that Nuan was one of the very few people who had actually helped Lucien when he had needed it. It had been clear after her visions of her mate back in the Autumn Court, and what she had seen of what had been done to him Under the Mountain, that not many ever stepped in to do anything to help him. But Nuan had. 

“Are you and Lucien staying long?”

“I don’t think so.” Elain replied, “Just long enough for him to craft a report for Rhysand, and I need to collect some Dawn Court flowers for my book, and then we are heading to the Day Court.”

Nuan’s onyx eyes moved over Elain and the faerie smiled. “You haven’t yet accepted the Mating Bond…”

“No…”

“And you intend to.”

“Yes.” She didn’t know why Nuan was asking her this, or why she was responding. 

“I have business in the Day Court soon, maybe our visits will coincide.”

“I… that would be nice.” Elain didn’t know where this was going. “Oh, I also wanted to thank you.” She said, her own eyes moving over Nuan’s golden skin and shiny dark hair. “I saw what you did for Lucien… and I really wanted to thank you for that. So many have ignored him over his life… and… he knew you would care enough to help him. For him to ask for you…”

“I know.” Nuan nodded, and her voice was gentle. “He was a good friend. He still is. He’s loyal and kind… and he would have done the same for me if he could.”

Elain just smiled at her. Lucien was all of those things. All of those things, and more.


	103. Chapter One Hundred and Three

**Chapter 103**

Leaning back against the cushions, Elain flipped open her book. She had brought the sequel to the book she had been reading so long ago on that night when she had wandered down into the kitchen to find Lucien in the dark. They had barely known one another then, and it felt like forever ago.

Drawing her lip between her teeth and biting it lightly, she turned the pages until she found where she had gotten up to previously. Things had just begun to get sexy, and she was kind of glad that she had a few minutes to herself to read. 

She had gotten back from her wander during which she had found several flowers to sketch into her book, and she didn’t think that Lucien would be back from his meeting with Thesan until closer to dinner. So, stretching out across the bed, Elain began to read.

_  
She gasped as Rohan turned her around and pulled her back against his firm body. It had been far too long since she had seen him, and they had been kept apart far longer than she ever thought that she could have handled. Having gotten around her father finally, however, they were together again and she couldn’t wait to make the most of it. Rohan evidentially felt the same, and she let out an excited gasp when he bent her over the table, his hands moving down to her hips and grinding himself against her. She could feel how ready he was and, as she widened her stance, he quickly pulled her skirts up her legs. When she heard him undoing his pants an instant later, she braced herself with her arms, palms flat against the table. Rohan’s hands were on her again, then, his own palms sliding up her thighs, and she couldn’t help letting out a soft moan. When one of his hands slid up her back, pressing her more firmly down against the table, she bit her lip knowing what was about to happen. Rohan pushed into her slowly, and her eyes closed as she groaned. It had been entirely too long since she had felt him like this and, wanting more, she pushed back to meet him as he thrust into her. Rohan evidentially took that as a sign to pick up the pace and, within moments, he had settled into a quick rhythm, thrusting with purpose.  
_

Elain knew that she was blushing. 

Biting her lip, she closed the book and set it aside as she drew a deep, shuddering, breath. “Oh, my…” she murmured. 

Even though she had now slept with Lucien, and done all kinds of things with him, she still found herself reacting this way when she read something like that. Especially when it was something that she hadn’t done. As she ran her fingers across her stomach, Elain thought about what it would be like to let Lucien have her from behind. She rather liked the idea of letting him have complete control over her like that and, from what she had read in the books she borrowed from Nesta, the males did always seem to like doing it like that. She wondered if it was control thing, if it was because it made them feel powerful, and she wondered if Lucien would like it.

As she pulled her skirt up her own legs, Elain chewed on her lower lip. She wondered if she should ask him if he wanted to do it that way, or if she should just present herself to him like that. Maybe it would be better if she surprised him. 

Maybe, she wondered, it would be better if she just waited until she accepted the bond. She would be able to read him, anyway. She would know how he felt about it. With that thought, Elain began to wonder if there was anything else that Lucien might be wanting that she hadn’t considered. Aside from that one time, where she had asked him if she could try getting on top of him, they hadn’t actually discussed it much. Everything had just kind of happened naturally. Perhaps there were things that he liked that she had never even thought of. Elain thought that was likely, considering how much more experience with it all he had compared with her. 

Would he tell her? She figured that he probably would. She should have asked before now, she thought. But, at least she would do so now.

Her eyes closed as she allowed her fingers to slip between her thighs. She found herself already hot and slick and, with a soft gasp, she began to gently rub herself in slow circles.

As the sun had faded behind the horizon, someone had come to let Elain know that dinner was about to be served and she had wandered down to the dining hall that she and Lucien had found earlier for lunch. Her mate was not there, and neither was the High Lord.

Figuring that they would be late, Elain had sat and eaten her dinner, talking quietly with Nuan who had appeared not long after she herself had arrived. The other faerie had told her a little more about what she would be doing in the Day Court soon enough, and Elain had talked to her a little bit about her life before she had been made fae, and about her sisters. 

Even if Nuan hadn’t been Lucien’s friend, and even if she hadn’t helped him in such a way, Elain thought that she would have liked Nuan anyway. There was a kindness to the other female, and Elain felt comfortable with her. She liked that Nuan would speak of things that were outside the ‘everyday’ that so often dominated small talk, and she had stories that were interesting to listen to. Nuan had been all over Prythian and she seemed to have something to say on every topic.  
It wasn’t until their dishes were cleared away that Elain looked to the window once again, frowning at the darkness beyond. Evidently Nuan saw this and a small frown appeared between her onyx eyes.

The door to the room flew open then and a handsome male faerie stalked in, his white feathered wings shifting behind him. 

“Aelius,” Nuan said, her tone low, “what is the matter?”

“The High Lord has not returned…” The faerie, Elain thought he might have been Thesan’s Captain of the Guard, replied. “Nor has the emissary…”

Getting to her feet, Elain looked at him. “Where are they?” she asked, her voice catching in her throat.

“I don’t know.” Aelius shook his head. “They were in the granaries this afternoon, but then went for a walk to discuss whatever it was they needed to discuss… they were last seen out by the western fields…”

Elain tried to swallow panic as Nuan got to her feet. “I take it you have sent a search?”

“Of course I have!” 

Elain watched the Captain of the Guard, who seemed more than a little frazzled himself. “Is this… unusual?” she asked, “Does he often go for walks…”

“Not without informing us and he’s always back by nightfall…” Aelius’s eyes fixed on Elain, “Unless the emissary thought to-”

Not even wanting to hear whatever accusation he was about to make, Elain cut him off. “No.” she said, her voice sharp, “There’s no way this would have been planned… you need to find them…” she moved toward Aelius, “You need to find your High Lord.” She stared at him. “Find my mate!”


	104. Chapter One Hundred and Four

**Chapter 104**

She could still hear his heartbeat. That meant that he was alive. Elain clung to this knowledge as she stared at the fire. Lucien’s heartbeat was slow and steady, and she tried to tell herself over and over again that that meant he was alright. Wherever he and Thesan were, he was okay. 

“Perhaps they were invited to eat by some of the faeries out in the agricultural community…” she tried, turning her eyes on Nuan who sat in the chair nearby, her own onyx eyes on the flames before them. 

“I… think they would have returned by now if that were the case.” Nuan’s voice was soft, and Elain could practically see the thoughts moving through the other female’s mind as she looked at her.

Blinking away tears of worry, Elain got to her feet. “I have to help look…”

“You cannot.”

“Why not?”

“You don’t have wings.” Nuan sat back in her chair, looking up at Elain. “Aelius and his Guard can all fly. They’re searching all over. It is far more effective than running around on the ground…”

Sinking back down, Elain tried to focus on her breathing. “I can’t just sit here all night and do nothing…” The look Nuan gave her then was pitying and Elain turned her eyes back on the fire so that the other faerie wouldn’t see her cry.

“Can you not…” Nuan paused, “ _See_ … where they are?”

Elain’s gaze slid back to the tinkerer. “I… I don’t know how to control it like that. Usually it happens without warning.”

“Try.”

Pushing her sleeves back, Elain thought for a moment. Wondering how she might trigger a vision, her hand came up to the garnet necklace that Lucien had given her. He had had it made for his future Mate, and she had not taken it off since he had put it on her. It was a symbol of their connection. The first time she had had a vision of Lucien had been when the bond had showed her Jesminda’s execution. It had happened when she had touched Lucien’s skin as he’d sat next to her in Rhys’ garden. 

She slipped her hand around to the clasp on the necklace and took it off. Holding the garnet in her hands, she stared down at it. Trying to think of nothing but Lucien, Elain stared into the depths of the jewel, noting the flames reflecting from the fire in an almost liquid fluidity. Her mate was out there somewhere, she just had to know where…

_  
Lucien snarled as he glared at Connal. His brother gave him a wide smile and then turned to the creature who had approached. Lucien had seen its kind before. Amarantha had used to keep a host of them around to do her bidding across Prythian. The creature was tall with leathery wings and skin, and his eyes caught on the long talon-like fingers that hung at its sides. When the creature spoke, long, sharp, teeth were put on full display, and Lucien shuddered. He wondered if it wasn’t somehow related to the Attor._

_“None followed us.” Its voice was like shifting sand, and Lucien let his eyes sweep around the area in which he found himself._

_There was a small fire, over which he was certain was some kind of glamour to keep them hidden, and the small amount of light it was giving off illuminated a basic camp. Thesan sat nearby, his usually glowing skin now dull and pale looking._

_“Are you alright?” Lucien asked, tugging at the bindings he had noticed around his wrists._

_“Faebane…” Thesan murmured, and Lucien noted the bloodstain on the High Lord’s shirt. It only then that he realised his own shoulder was burning and, turning his head, he tried to look to his own back. His shirt was clinging to him in a way that suggested he’d lost some blood and the dullness of his own fire, when he reached for it, told him he’d been dosed with faebane as well._

_“Fuck.”_

_“Aelius…” Thesan murmured, and Lucien watched as the High Lord’s eyes fluttered closed for a moment as he evidently struggled to remain awake. “will find…”_

_“Aelius?” Lucien asked, hoping to keep him awake. “Is he your…”_ Lover _? “Captain of the Guard…?”_

_“Yes…” Thesan sway a little and Lucien frowned. He needed him awake._

_“Do you know where we are?”_

_“South…”The High Lord murmured, “South of where we were… Close to the border…”_

_Lucien looked around them again. The creature that Connal had been speaking with had disappeared into the darkness outside the light of the fire and, as Connal approached them again, Lucien lifted his eyes to his brother’s face. He had thought Connal a follower, he always had been when Lucien had lived in the Autumn Court. But, he figured, that was a long time ago._

_“Awake, at last.”_

_“What are you doing?” Lucien asked, frowning. “What is the point of this?”_

_“This…” Connal gestured around them, his grin just a little manic, “Is your doing.” Lucien just stared at his brother. He’d always thought Malak the unstable one, but perhaps that was no longer the case either. “You’re going to kill the High Lord of the Dawn Court…”_

_“I’m not.”_

_Connal smiled again. “But they’ll think you will have.”  
_

Elain gasped and Nuan shook her, hands tight on Elain’s shoulders. “Open your eyes!” Nuan said firmly, and Elain tried to do as she had been told. The faerie’s pretty face swam into view, and she forced herself to breathe. “South…” she murmured, “It’s Connal… he has Lucien and Thesan near the border… They’re going to kill Thesan and make it look like Lucien did it…”

Nuan didn’t ask Elain if she was sure, or question her at all. “I’ll be back.” She murmured, before sweeping quickly from the room. Elain knew that she had gone to send word to Aelius and his Guard, and she let out a relieved breath. Lowering her eyes, she looked again at the garnet she held in her hands. 

Perhaps it was touch that had allowed her to summon that vision. It had certainly seemed to have been a trigger in the past. Not always, though, she realised. Many times a vision had snuck up on her when she had done nothing more than breathe. Perhaps it would be useful to summon visions of her own volition in future however. This was something that she very much needed to work out.

With shaking hands, Elain lifted the necklace and fixed the clasp into place again. She let the garnet settle against her chest once more, and she drew a slow breath. Willing herself to breathe, she closed her eyes as she leaned back in the chair. If she focused, perhaps she could see a little more of what was happening to Lucien. 

If Connal did kill Thesan, surely nobody would believe it had been Lucien. That wouldn’t make sense. Why would he ever seek to do something like that? It would spark another war between the courts, if Rhysand and the Night Court even tried to defend him. Elain didn’t know if they would. Would Rhys consider that worth starting a war for? She doubted it. 

Trying again to see where Lucien was, Elain hoped that Aelius and the others found where Lucien and Thesan were being held. She hoped that they would get there in time to prevent Connal doing anything harmful. 

Nuan came back into the room and Elain opened her eyes to meet that onyx gaze. “I have sent word.”

“Okay…” Elain lifted a hand to run through her hair. 

“It will take them some time to get to the border.”

“Yes…” Elain let out a huff, closing her eyes to try and see if she could summon another vision. Fear prickled at her heart. Lucien wasn’t going to just sit there and watch his brother kill the High Lord of the Dawn Court, and she didn’t know what Connal intended to do to him. If they weren’t found in time… 

Swallowing thickly, Elain tried not to think about the possibilities. She was glad that her eyes were closed, because she could feel tears welling in them. Lifting her hand to take hold of the garnet in her necklace, she tried again to clear her mind of anything but Lucien. Listening to his faint heartbeat, she focused only on him.


	105. Chapter One Hundred and Five

**Chapter 105**

“I think that you should rest…” Nuan’s hand came down on Elain’s shoulder, and Elain had to resist shrugging her off. Her head was pounding and her heart was beating wildly, but she had been unable to see anything further, and she had no idea what was happening to Lucien. She could still feel his heartbeat but it had been erratic for a little while now and she was terrified that every beat she heard would be the last. 

“No…”

“At least have a drink…”

“I don’t need-” Elain broke off when shaking her head caused her head to pound even harder. “Okay…”

Nuan pressed a cup into her hands and Elain obediently raised it to her lips and took a sip. “You haven’t seen anything further?”

“No.” Elain breathed, resting her head back against her chair. “Something is happening… but I don’t know what.”

“Lucien would want you to eat something…”

“I had dinner.” Elain replied dismissively. 

“Yes. And you have spent several hours trying to force yourself to control that ability of yours while not knowing how. You’ve forced yourself into a headache, and you need food and drink to ease it.”

Feeling petulant, Elain wanted to tell Nuan that she wasn’t a healer, but she knew the truth of what the other faerie was telling her. “Fine.” She pushed herself to her feet and wandered over to the small side table that had been laid with a tray of food to pick at. Selecting a small golden fruit that she didn’t recognise, Elain put it into her mouth and chewed. The sweet juice from the fruit did make her feel better and she picked up another for good measure before moving toward the first once more. 

“When you accept the bond…” Nuan began, “Will you have a priestess bless the union?”

“I… what?” Elain turned to look at Nuan, surprise shocking her out of her previous thoughts. “I… don’t know. Lucien and I haven’t talked about that…” She rather suspected not, after what he went through with Ianthe.

“What about rings?”

“I…” Elain couldn’t help looking down at her left hand. She had worn Graysen’s ring, and more than a small part of her deeply desired another to replace it. She suspected that she would get great joy out of wearing Lucien’s ring. “I like the idea…” she said simply.

“Does he?”

“I don’t know.” She replied. They hadn’t spoken of that, either, but Elain was fairly certain that Lucien would like the idea as well. She really couldn’t see him not enjoying anything that she could wear that would publicly announce that she was his. 

With that thought Elain’s ears began to ring and she groped for her chair before her vision blurred.

_  
Spitting blood into the dirt, Lucien tried to push himself up with his bound hands. He could see Thesan sprawled nearby. The High Lord was only semi-conscious at this point, and Lucien didn’t know what he was going to do to get them out of this situation. He knew that Connal had more of those creatures nearby, he could hear their chatter and strange voices in the dark. As far as he could tell, the camp was surrounded._

_Connal’s foot connected with Lucien’s ribs again and he let out a grunt of pain. With a growl, Lucien tried to push himself up again. “So…” he ground out, flicking a glance up at his brother, “Where’d you find your friends?”_

_“There are lots of us who don’t belong to a Court…” Connal said, his voice low, “Many of them don’t take much convincing for anything that will shake the Courts up… like… say… killing a High Lord and starting a war.”_

_“Why would you want another war?”_

_“I don’t care about war.” Connal muttered, “Although I wouldn’t mind watching the Courts all burn…. I just want you to suffer.” Lucien gave him what he assumed was a disgusted look, but Connal just smiled widely at him. “You deserve it all.” He said, “You’ve murdered three of your own brothers.”_

_“So this wasn’t even your own plan?” Lucien managed to drag himself into a sitting position. “You just wanted to get at me and your new friends put the rest of it together?”_

_“They’ve had longer to grow bitter and think about their opportunities.” Connal grinned. “But they were only too eager to join me in this.”_

_“I’ll bet.” Lucien shook his head, “They’re using you.”_

_“Not likely.” Connal spat. “I’m in charge.”_

_“You can’t kill me.” Lucien told him, “Not if the plan is to frame me for Thesan’s murder…”_

_“Even if I can’t, you’ll be executed for it…” He grinned widely, “Maybe they’ll even make your mate watch… I’m sure you can understand how horrible that will be for her.” Lucien couldn’t bite back a snarl at that, and Connal’s only response was to kick him in the ribs again. As Lucien gasped for breath, spitting more blood into the dirt, Connal made his way toward Thesan nearby. “It is a shame…” he said, “A shame you came here… that it will be him…” Amber eyes turned Lucien’s way once more, “That is your fault too. You could have gone anywhere else, but he will die because you came here.” He looked back down at Thesan. “It’s a shame. He is quite magnificent…” As his brother pulled his sword from his belt, Lucien pushed himself up once more, trying to force his brain to work. If he did nothing now, Thesan would die._

_“While I’m sure you’ve fantasised about it, you know he’d never touch you.”_

_Connal sent a sneer his way. “What would you know about it?”_

_“I’ve spoken with him.” Lucien said, his brain trying to catch up with what was happening, “I’ve found being an emissary gets you through doors that being the nobody sixth son of a High Lord never would. Everyone knew Eris would inherit the throne, and I bet that Thesan doesn’t even know your name.”_

_“I’m older than you…”_

_“Yeah, but I’ve made myself useful in other ways.” Lucien tossed his hair over one shoulder in what he hoped was an arrogant manner, “I’m not only a High Lord’s son now.”_

_“You’re nothing.”_

_“Yet someone like him would still never look at you.” He winked at Connal with his good eye, “I’d wager you’re just not up to his standards… aesthetically.”_

_He paid for that when Connal strode quickly toward him and kicked him in the teeth. Blood flooded his mouth and he rolled onto his side from where he had fallen to spit it out, running his tongue over his teeth and hoping that he hadn’t just lost any of them. He coughed then, when Connal kicked at him again, although a grim satisfaction spread throughout Lucien at the fact that his brother was no longer standing over Thesan._

_A faint flicker sparked somewhere within Lucien and he wondered how long it had been since he had been dosed with Faebane. It had been several hours as they’d been brought here before nightfall, and there had been several hours of darkness so far. He judged that it was actually probably close to midnight. If the dose had been small enough…_

_When he felt a rush of fear from Elain, Lucien grasped at that bond. He hadn’t been able to feel her since the faebane had been in his body but, feeling her now, he knew that it was fading. He also knew that she had figured out where they were being kept, and that Thesan’s Captain of the Guard was on his way to find them._

_Remembering that the camp had been glamoured to hide them from sight, Lucien resisted a groan. Turning his focus inward, he tried to gather his strength to stoke that little flame of power he had felt spark to life. For several minutes Lucien poured everything he had into it, building it and cradling it until it burned bright. Then, as Connal kicked at him again, Lucien released it. He squeezed his eyes shut as a golden light flared and encompassed the camp as he flung it at the glamour, cleaving it into pieces and revealing them to anyone who so much as glanced their way._

_“What… what the fuck was that?” Connal demanded, and Lucien glanced up at his brother who glared down at him. As Connal lifted his sword, Lucien tried to scramble backward, but found it difficult with his hands bound before him. “What did you just do?”_

_Shaking his head, Lucien didn’t answer. It hadn’t been a conscious decision, but rather instinct. It had been the same thing he had done when he had been desperately trying to get to Elain as Hybern had ordered her dumped out of the Cauldron. He knew now that it was Helion’s power, but he still didn’t have control over it. Connal lifted the sword higher, and Lucien had just figured that all his efforts had been for nothing when several pairs of feet hit the dirt nearby._

_White feathers caught Lucien’s attention and he glanced around the camp as more armoured Peregryns landed among them. Connal seemed to realise, too late, what was happening and made a dive for Thesan, but a handsome faerie, the same Lucien had seen the High Lord with earlier in the day, got there first. There was a clash of metal on metal, and then Connal hit the ground and did not move.  
_

Tears of relief fell from Elain’s eyes and she sank to the plush rug before the fire, burying her face in her hands. She felt Nuan kneel down beside her a moment later, and she sought to get herself under control enough to tell the other faerie what she had seen. 

“What happened?” Nuan asked.

“Aelius found them…” Elain wiped her eyes with the back of one hand. “Connal is dead.”

“And those who were helping him?”

“I… didn’t see…” Fear seized Elain’s heart again. She hadn’t considered the others who had been outside of the camp, and she tried not to think of those talon-like claws that she was certain could do huge amounts of damage if raked across flesh.

“We will find out soon enough…” Nuan’s gentle hands were suddenly under Elain’s elbows, lifting her from the floor and directing her into the nearby chair. “Once Aelius has Thesan, he will return him here as quickly as he is able.”

“And Lucien…?”

“No doubt close behind.”

Elain sat silently in the chair, her eyes on the fire, as she listened desperately to Lucien’s heartbeat. If she held on to that sound, then she would be able to track him all the way back to the palace. If she couldn’t see him though a vision, then she would listen to him, making sure that she knew that he was alright and on his way back to her. She wasn’t moving from the chair she was in until she had him back.


	106. Chapter One Hundred and Six

**Chapter 106**

Scrambling under and around fighting faeries, Lucien tried to avoid getting noticed. The instant Aelius had dispatched Connal, he had turned to Thesan and lifted his High Lord into his arms before launching himself skyward. Thesan was evidently the priority, and getting him back to the palace had been their foremost goal. Now, with his hands still bound, Lucien just wanted to avoid being killed in the battle. There was screeching and the sound of metal clashing with metal, and the heavy sounds of bodies hitting the ground, and Lucien thought that it would just be typical for him to have gotten through all of this only to now take a sword to the chest and die in the dirt.

A female Peregryn suddenly knelt down before Lucien, blade in her hands, and sliced through his bonds and he gave her a smile. “That’s helpful.” He remarked, then able to push himself to his feet. She disappeared back into the fray and Lucien bent to pick up a fallen sword. He needn’t have bothered, however, as another Peregryn suddenly wrapped an arm around his middle and then Lucien felt his feet leave the ground. Closing his eyes, he tried not to think about how high up they were. He hated this, being carted around like a doll. He would have much preferred to winnow but, he figured, the faebane was probably still enough in his system to prevent him going very far at all. This would likely be faster. 

For the first time since he had awoken in the camp, Lucien allowed himself to think about being able to return to Elain. He hadn’t entertained the possibility before, not wanting to give himself that false hope when it had been extremely likely that he was probably going to die, but now…

Smiling, he just tried to think about the look on her face when she saw him. He could imagine how good it would feel to wrap his arms around her, pulling her to himself. Her hair would feel so silky smooth between his fingers, and smell of the lavender shampoo she favoured. 

When he saw the palace rising before them, Lucien smiled more widely. He wanted nothing more than to have a bath, and wash the blood and dirt from himself, and then wrap himself in Elain and the soft sheets of the bed and to lose himself in sleep. Exhaustion seemed to pump through him, and he suspected that it was because he had forced himself to use so much power while still struggling against the faebane. In any other circumstance, he would have left it a while longer. Now, he knew that he was going to pretty much fall unconscious and not wake until probably lunch tomorrow. 

The landing was more gentle than he anticipated and he muttered a word of thanks to the Peregryn who had carried him. A heavy hand on his shoulder then guided him inside and through several hallways. 

“Where is Thesan?” He asked, figuring that he should check on the High Lord and if he was alright.

“This way.”

“Right…” Lucien began to grow nervous, wondering if he was still going to be blamed for what had happened. Maybe they thought it was his fault that Thesan had been out there in the first place, which it was, but he figured that was unfair.

Lucien was lead into a sitting room and the first thing he heard was a relieved cry. Elain was suddenly running toward him and then, when she was close enough, she threw herself at him. Lucien caught her, but was knocked backwards where he hit the wall and slid to the floor, still holding Elain safely in his arms as she wrapped herself around him. He doubted that she had even noticed that they were on the ground as she looked up at him, both of her hands now on his face, stroking and caressing him as her dark eyes, red rimmed and bloodshot, moved across him as if analysing every detail she could find. As Lucien held Elain to himself, she wrapped more tightly around him until he wasn’t sure where his own body ended and hers began, until they were indivisible.

“Are you okay?” she breathed, “Tell me you are okay…” her voice hitched and he could see tears welling in her eyes. “Lucien….”

“I’m okay.” He told her, snaking an arm around her waist and holding her even more firmly to himself. 

“You don’t look okay…”

“I…” he paused, “There was faebane.” He told her gently, his fingers stroking her lower back slowly, “I haven’t healed…”

“I saw.” She whispered, one of her hands sliding into his hair and Lucien frowned. “I saw what Connal did, and know what he planned…” she leaned into him and a moment later he felt her soft lips brush against his. “I saw what you did…”

“Did you?” he couldn’t stop looking at her as he slid one of his hands up to run through her hair, just like he had imagined on his way back to the palace. Her legs were tangled with his out across the floor and, as he tightened his hold on her again, he was able to breathe in that familiar lavender scent as she nodded. 

“I made myself see…” her fingers ghosted lightly across his cheek, “I had to know what was happening…”

“You could control it?”

“A little.” Her dark eyes moved over him again before she smiled and pressed her lips to his once more. Lucien’s eyes closed and he resisted a flinch at the pain, knowing that, unless he healed himself, his face would be black and blue with bruises by morning. “Did that hurt?” she had lifted her head, and was looking at him with a frown when he opened his eyes. 

“It was worth it.” He replied, giving her a grin, which also hurt. 

The look in Elain’s eyes changed and she leaned into him, resting her cheek against his chest. As she settled against him, Lucien looked around the rest of the room for the first time. Nuan was sitting by the fire, her eyes flicking between him and the couple who stood by the window. Lucien relaxed a little more when he saw Thesan was on his feet. The High Lord looked to be well enough as he stood, smiling gently at the faerie Lucien now recognised to be Aelius. The Peregryn had an arm possessively around Thesan’s shoulders as they stared at one another, foreheads just about touching. Lucien could see them murmuring softly to one another, but he could not make out anything that was being said. They looked completely caught up in one another and completely unaware of anyone or anything around them. 

Looking back down to Elain, he could feel her relief. “Petal…” he murmured, “Do you think it’s time we went back to our own room?”

“Yes.” She lifted her head from his chest, her eyes meeting his with understanding. Lucien released her and she got to her feet, pulling him up with her when he struggled. Casting a glance again at Nuan, Lucien gave his friend an acknowledging nod before he turned and walked back up the hallway with Elain. 

He really was looking forward to getting into a nice, hot, bath and scrubbing every inch of himself. He could feel the blood and dirt settling into his skin and he wanted it gone. Elain’s arm around his waist was comforting and, by the time they reached their room, he was loathe to lose that contact. It seemed as if she felt the same way as, when she released him, she gave him a regretful look before striding across the room to the bed. “You do what you need to…” she told him, “I’ll be right here when you need me…” Lucien thought about asking her to come into the bathroom with him, but figured he would be faster if she didn’t. He really was exhausted and the faster he got into bed the better. 

Nodding, he turned and headed for the bathroom, stripping his jacket off as he went.


	107. Chapter One Hundred and Seven

**Chapter 107**

Staring at the closed bathroom door, Elain chewed on her lower lip. It was taking a considerable amount of her self-restraint to keep herself sitting on the bed when all that she really wanted to do was walk across the room and open that door. She wanted to be able to see Lucien. Having only just gotten him back after being so scared that she was going to lose him, she did not enjoy being separated from him if only by a single door. 

“Just wait.” She murmured to herself, turning and looking for her nightdress. He was just cleaning up, and then he would be out again and she would be able to touch him once more. “Wait…” Elain got to her feet and began undoing her dress and stripping it off. She slipped the nightdress over her head and smoothed it down over herself. 

Trying to keep herself busy, Elain moved around the room, picking up things and moving them for no real reason under the pretence of tidying up. She rearranged her things by her pack, and then moved back to sit on the bed and face the fact that she just had to wait. 

Thankfully, it was only a few moments later when the bathroom door opened and Lucien emerged. Elain was on her feet in and instant and striding toward him. His eyes, both russet and gold, met hers just as she reached him and he gave a small smile. “Were you waiting, Petal?”

“I was.” She looked him over, hesitant to touch him, knowing that he had been hurt. “Did you heal?” she asked and Lucien tilted his head. 

“Ah…” he lifted a hand to take hold of the end of her braid, his gaze sliding down to look at it. “I healed my face…”

“Oh?” she asked, lifting one of her own hands to his cheek so she could inspect him. She remembered seeing Connal kick him in the face, and all evidence of that had indeed disappeared. “A little vain, are we?” she smiled, her eyes moving across his handsome face, her fingers tracing his scar to his jaw. 

“Not particularly.” He replied, one of his arms sliding around her as he carefully drew her nearer. Elain just looked up at him as she watched his own gaze move over her face, “But I wanted to be able to kiss you…”

“Mmm, well, I was hoping that you’d do more than that.” She murmured a moment before his lips met hers. Lucien’s arm tightened around her waist and he lifted her, just a little, and Elain let her own hand slide from his jaw around to the back of his neck. She felt his wince a moment before he slowly released her, lowering her back to her feet and standing straight again. “You really didn’t heal the rest of you?” her hand brushed lightly against his ribs and he shook his head. 

“It will take a while. I still don’t have my full strength back.”

“Oh…” she looked toward the door to their room. “Well, I am certain that someone else could do it…”

“It’s okay.” He told her, “I will be fine by morning…”

Elain watched his face carefully, not liking the fact that he was still in pain. “If you are certain…?”

“I…” he murmured, his hand moving down her braid again, “just want to be with you.” She smiled at him as he began backing her toward the bed, a smile on his own face. “Now that you have me returned to you, what would you have of me?”

Elain rather thought that he was probably currently incapable of what she had been imagining. “Well,” she breathed, her fingers tracing lightly across the material of his shirt. “you’re in pain…”

Lucien gave her a lazy smirk an instant before the back of her legs hit the bed. His hand pressed against her shoulder until she sat back onto the mattress and then he lifted that hand to her cheek, as he stood over her. She watched as he sank to his knees before her, his thumb tracing her cheekbone as he did so. 

“What are you doing?” she asked, her breath catching in her throat as something tightened inside of her. Lucien’s free hand slid from her ankle up her calf to her knee. He gave her another lazy smirk, and Elain couldn’t help spreading her legs a little wider as his other hand dropped to her thigh. “You’re hurt…”

“I can still do this…”

Her breath was coming in quick gasps and Elain just watched as he bent to press a soft kiss to her inner thigh as his hands slid up, taking the hem of her nightdress with them. “O-okay…” She nodded, giving in. Lucien gave a low chuckle and then licked at the skin he had just kissed. “ah…” Elain didn’t know what to do with her hands. She went to reach out to him, but thought better of it, not wanting to touch him anywhere he hadn’t healed, so she grasped handfuls of the bedspread instead, still unable to take her eyes off of him as he slowly licked and kissed his way up her inner thigh.

When Lucien wrapped his arms under her thighs and tightened his grip to hold her in place, Elain allowed her eyes to close as she drew a deep breath. She tried to shift, unable to sit still, with the growing need to feel him directly between her thighs. He gave another chuckle, which she felt as much as heard, an instant before she felt his tongue on her. “Oh…” Grasping the bedspread more tightly, Elain’s back arched slightly as something that felt like lightening shot up her spine. Lucien licked her again as he dragged her a little closer and toward the edge of the bed, and Elain allowed herself to fall back against the covers as he lifted her legs and slung them carefully over his shoulders. “By the Cauldron…”

Trying to maintain her focus and pay attention to everything Lucien was doing, Elain couldn’t help but think about how desperate she had been for him to come back to her, and how scared she had been that his brother was going to kill him. She had him now. He was here, and Elain knew that he was doing this to prove to her exactly that. As he pushed his tongue into her, Elain was unable to stop herself reaching down and sliding a hand into his hair as she gave a high-pitched cry. “Aiee…” He licked her again, then, slowly and completely and she clamped her other hand over her mouth to keep herself from shrieking.

Lucien knew exactly the right place to focus his attention, and he did so as Elain squirmed. After a few moments, when she could feel her blood pumping throughout her entire body, he released his hold on one of her thighs and then slid his hand up her body and to her elbow. Elain knew that he was seeking her hand and she brought it down to meet his. Lucien linked his fingers through hers and Elain held on to him as she let out another cry as he maintained his perfect routine between her thighs. “ah… ah… oh… my…” she gasped as her back arched of its own accord and Elain felt as if she had no control over any part of her own body. Lucien continued what he was doing with his tongue and Elain felt heat coiling low through her. “Ah…” she released his hair and flung her arm out to the side, grabbing a handful of the bedspread and clenching it tightly in her fist, “Oh my… oh… Yes… Lucien…” he gave her hand an encouraging squeeze by way of answer, and she clung to him as she lost the ability to form words, and all that spilt from her lips then was a wordless cry as he carried her over that edge, not stopping what he was doing until her voice had faded to a breathless shriek and she had relaxed, releasing the bedspread. 

“Did you enjoy that, Petal?” His voice sounded pleased, and Elain just nodded. She felt his lips against the sensitive skin of her inner thigh before he sat back and Elain helped him shift her legs from over his shoulders so that he could get to his feet. She hadn’t yet been able to open her eyes as she lay, trying to catch her breath, her blood pounding in her ears and around her body more than a little enthusiastically. When the bed dipped, Elain forced her eyes open to see Lucien kneeling on the edge. She was comfortable and feeling rather languid, yet she made herself move, shifting herself up, until she could lay against the pillows, having pushed the covers back so that they could get beneath them. 

When Elain settled herself she smiled at Lucien as he moved slowly, stiffly, toward her. “Are you alright?” she asked, her eyes taking him in. She frowned at his slight wince as he lowered himself to lay beside her.

“I’m fine.” He replied, smiling at her, “How do you feel?”

Elain lifted a hand to his cheek, sliding it straight back into his hair. “Like lightning struck me and now I am half melted into a puddle…”

“Oh…” his lips quirked and Elain tilted her head, looking at him. 

“You are aware of how good you are at that, aren’t you?”

“Yes.” His smirk told her that he knew _exactly_ how good at that he was, and she grinned as he shifted closer until he could rest his cheek against her chest, one of his arms sliding around her waist. Elain wrapped her own arms around him, holding him firmly as she felt him relax against her. 

“You’re exhausted…” she murmured, combing the fingers of one hand through his hair. 

“Mhmmm.”

“Rest…” she breathed, continuing to move her fingers through his hair. She had thought to read to him, but she didn’t think she could make herself let him go, and she could feel how much he enjoyed having her arms around him, so she began to talk about one of the books she had been reading. She decided against the one she had borrowed from Nesta, but settled on explaining the plot of another mystery, trying not to give away any crucial clues in case he decided that wanted to read it later himself. 

It wasn’t long before she knew that Lucien had fallen asleep and, carefully, she pulled the bedspread over the both of them. Closing her eyes, she rested her head back against the pile of pillows, thankful beyond belief that she had been able to end this day with her mate wrapped around her, safe and whole.


	108. Chapter One Hundred and Eight

**Chapter 108**

The pleasant soft sun, perfectly warm and golden, spilled through the window and across half of the bed. Elain opened her eyes with a smile, comfortable and content, able to hear Lucien’s soft heartbeat as she could feel him beside her. One of his arms was still draped across her stomach and she could feel his face pressed into her shoulder. Her smile widened when she turned her head to look at him. He looked far less troubled than he usually did, and Elain couldn’t help bending her head to press a gentle kiss to his forehead. 

He opened his eyes then, and Elain felt bad for a moment. “Good morning, my love.” She lifted a hand to smooth his vibrant hair back from his face, taking in the way that golden sunlight glimmered in his metallic eye. That eye clicked and whirred as he focused on her, and a soft smile spread across his handsome face. “I’m sorry I woke you…”

His hand lifted to her forearm, sliding down to take hold of her left hand. “Have you been awake long, Petal?”

“No.” her fingers carded through his hair. “Do you feel better?” she asked, “Are you healed?”

“I am.” He lifted himself to an elbow so that he could see her face better. “Good as new.”

Elain freed her hand from his and moved to lift the bottom of his shirt so that she could see his skin. There was no sign of any bruising and her eyes went back to his. “That’s good…” She smiled at him, noting the way that he was staring at her, as if trying to drink in every detail of her face. “Are you alright?”

“Yes.” He replied, “I just… want… to notice everything about you…”

“Why?” Elain gave a soft laugh, “I’m right here… You can look any time you like.” She leaned into him, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, directly over his scar. “I was wondering,” she began slowly, “About Thesan…”

“What about him?”

“What do you think he does on Calanmai?” She asked, “When he has to take all that power into himself and it makes him choose…”

“Because Aelius isn’t exactly a maiden?” Lucien asked, and Elain nodded. “Well, I can’t say for sure.” He went on, “I’ve not been here for it… But I suppose he either does it, as he is the High Lord and he must… or, he might have somebody take part in the Rite for him…”

Elain looked at Lucien, unbidden images of the vision she had once had of him fucking Ianthe during the Rite flashing through her mind. His expression changed and it was clear that he knew what she had just seen. “Elain…”

Shaking her head, Elain leaned into him, pressing her lips to his. “It’s okay,” she breathed, “I know you’re mine…”

“In every way.” He followed her lips with his as she moved until he pulled her back down to kiss him again. “Want me to prove it?” he asked, and Elain smiled into his next kiss.

“How?”

“Hmm…” slowly he shifted his weight until he was pressing down on Elain and she smiled up at him. “I think I can probably figure something out…” His eyes flicked back and forth across her face as he looked down at her and Elain instinctively parted her legs, hooking one of her feet around behind Lucien’s knee, “Mmmm… Like that…” his smirk was lazy and arrogant, and Elain felt heat flood her. That smirk was quickly becoming one of her favourites. She knew that she was wet and, when one of Lucien’s hands slid down between her legs, his raised eyebrow told her that now he knew she was as well.

When he dipped his head, pressing his lips to her throat, Elain’s eyes slid closed as both of her hands moved to his back. Quickly, she tugged the bottom of his shirt up, pulling it until he let it slip over his head before she tossed it across the room. Lucien grinned, his weight on her increasing and she hummed in appreciation when both of his hands then made their way up her body, along her ribs. He slid them carefully down her arms before taking hold of both of her wrists and bringing them up to pin firmly by her head. Opening her eyes, Elain gave a soft laugh. “What are you doing?” she asked and his only response was to lick carefully at her throat. “Ugh…” She tried to lift her hands, wanting to touch him, but he held them down, pinning her beneath himself. “Lucien…” He licked again at her throat, having found the place he knew would get the best responses from her, and Elain bit back another groan. She was practically throbbing now, wanting him to touch her, wanting to feel him inside her. “Please…”

“Not yet…” he growled, his lips moving to her ear and Elain arched, trying to get as much contact with him as she could. She gasped then when his lips went back to her throat a moment before she felt his teeth scrape against her skin. 

“Lucien…” She knew she sounded like she was begging, but she didn’t care. It was then she realised that he liked this. He liked to tease her, and he wanted her drenched and desperate for him. He wanted her well and truly ready for him, slick and well prepared before he went anywhere near her. And she realised that she liked it too. “Oh…” He silenced her with a kiss then, his tongue sweeping her mouth thoroughly, slowly, while he held her wrists still pinned by her head, his grip on her as firm as it had been. Elain moaned into the kiss, and wrapped her legs more tightly around him. Lucien slid both her hands up higher until he could grasp both of her wrists in one of his own large hands, and then he slid the other back down her body, so very slowly. She gasped when that hand went between her legs for just a moment, and then she felt him fiddling with his pants. “Yes…” she breathed, “Yes…”

Lucien’s lips went back to her throat, kissing her gently while he maintained his tight grip on her wrists above her head. She could feel him adjusting himself over her before he pushed the hem of her nightdress further up until it bunched at her hips. “Mmm… ah…” She met Lucien’s eyes then when he lifted his head just enough to meet her gaze, and she held that gaze as he shifted himself. A small whine escaped her when she felt him press himself to her, hesitating for just a moment, clearly wanting to hear her beg him. She didn’t mind. “Please…” she breathed again, “I want you…”

He gave her another lazy arrogant smirk before he pushed into her, ever so deliberately. Elain gasped, still holding his gaze as she then held her breath, feeling every slow inch of him until his hips were flush against hers. “Lucien…”

“All yours…” he breathed, rolling those hips. Elain groaned and, finally, he released her wrists. Wrapping her arms around him, Elain clung to his back as he began to move, a smooth rhythm established within moments. 

“I… I know…” her eyes slid closed and she held on to him, lifting her hips to meet his movements and enjoying a flush of satisfaction when she heard an appreciative groan from Lucien when he brought his lips back to her ear. His smooth rhythm continued, and Elain held on to him, wrapped around him as best as she could as the last of the anxiety and fear at possibly losing him from the day before was washed away. This was, by far, the best morning that she could remember in a very long time.


	109. Chapter One Hundred and Nine

**Chapter 109**

Thesan found them as they strolled along an outdoor balcony, overlooking the fields and soft meadows of the Court. Elain had stopped to inspect a small pink flower growing out a decorative pot and, as she pulled out her little book, flipping for a blank page, the High Lord approached them.

“Lucien…” Thesan came to a stop, his eyes moving over them, “Elain…”

Elain stood up, standing beside Lucien, and smiling at Thesan. “Good afternoon…” She said, smoothing her dress down carefully. The High Lord smiled at her in return before he turned his brown eyes on Lucien, and Elain could see that it was her mate he had come to speak with.

“I have sent the Night Court an account of what occurred yesterday.”

“As have I.” Lucien replied evenly. Thesan nodded.

“Yes, I figured you would have.” Brown hands twisted together in front of him before Thesan gave a light sigh. “You saved my life.” Those warm eyes were focussed entirely upon Lucien and Elain felt surprise reach her down the bond. “I know that you deliberately antagonised your brother so that he would become distracted with wanting to punish you. You bought me time.”

“I…” Lucien straightened a little. “Yes.”

“That was a very brave thing to do…”

“Oh…” Lucien waved a hand, “I’m used to my mouth getting me into trouble.” He said, “I figured I’d put it to good use.”

Shaking his head, Thesan looked intently at Lucien, “Not everyone would have done that.” The High Lord told him. “Thank you.” 

Lucien bowed his head a little and Elain smiled widely, unable to help herself. She didn’t suppose that it was a particularly common thing for Lucien to experience; someone recognising what he had done and acknowledging it. She could tell that he wasn’t entirely sure of how to respond, and his heartrate had increased significantly. Thesan smiled at him a moment later, apparently pleased enough with the bow.

“I know that you have left the Spring Court and Tamlin’s employ, and you are evidently currently residing in the Night Court but if you should ever tire of that…” The High Lord paused, “You would be welcome here. You _are_ welcome here. You may stay as long as you like. You may stay permanently, if you wished. I know that Nuan would be pleased.” He smiled at Lucien, “She has always spoken highly of you.”

A strange emotion reached Elain down the bond then, and she wasn’t sure that she recognised it. It was followed by more surprise and a sense of longing, and she knew that the fact Lucien still felt like he didn’t have a home continued to hurt him. Taking his hand gently in her own she smiled at him when he turned his head to look at her. “I thank you for that.” He said, his words directed at Thesan, “We shall keep that in mind…”

“Of course.” Thesan replied, smiling as his eyes slid toward Elain, “Such things must be considered jointly when one has a mate.” Lucien nodded and Elain smiled at both males. “I hope you enjoy the rest of your time here with us.” The High Lord said, “Do you know when you are expected to head to the Day Court?”

“Not yet.” Lucien replied, “Rhys has said he will send word in the next day or so.”

“Well, you are, of course, free to wander the Court at your leisure. Should you need anything, you must only ask.”

“Thank you.” Lucien replied and Elain turned her eyes back on the pink flower she had been about to begin to try and sketch.

“If you make a tea from the petals of this flower,” Thesan began, his voice gentle, “You can banish even the most stubborn of headaches…”

“Really?” Elain asked. He nodded and she began writing that down to accompany her sketch. “That’s wonderful.”

“It’s also used in a massage oil.” He added, “It is quite soothing in many forms…”

“Oh, perfect…” She wrote that down as well, then crouched to have a closer look at the flower. As she began her sketch, she heard Lucien clear his throat. 

“Ah, Thesan? Can I ask?” he said softly, “What happened to Connal’s… friends?” Elain glanced up to see Lucien frowning.

“The Peregryn chased them off.” Thesan said simply, “Those who didn’t perish in the battle fled back across the border and into the mountains…”

“So they’re gone?”

“Effectively, yes.”

Looking back to her sketch, Elain worked silently. She listened in to Lucien and Thesan’s conversation here and there, but mostly she tried to focus on what she was doing. She had decided that she definitely wanted to try the tea made with this flower. If it tasted nearly as good as the flower smelled, she would bet it would be delicious. 

*

Lucien followed Elain around the Court for most of the afternoon. She had told him that she wanted to finish her sketches as quickly as she was able, because she wanted to be ready to go to the Day Court as soon as they knew that they were scheduled to do so. He had enjoyed watching her work, and he had enjoyed showing her the best views of the Court that he had remembered. It had surprised him, that Thesan would offer him a place at his court. Other than Tamlin, nobody had ever really shown that they would value him for who he was. Sure, Rhys had offered him a job, and he had been told that he could stay at the Night Court if he wanted to, but he knew that was because he was Feyre’s friend, and Elain’s mate. They didn’t want him for who he was. 

But Thesan had seen what he had done, and had valued him. Lucien had always liked the Dawn Court, he supposed. It was pleasant here, and Thesan was a good faerie, and a decent High Lord. Nuan, and the others like her were clever. He had always enjoyed the conversations with those who lived at the Dawn Court, they were curious and intelligent, and he knew that he would find living here interesting. It was worth considering, he decided. It was worth discussing with Elain. 

This was a gentle, beautiful place, and he thought that Elain would do well here. It was all too easy to see her in his mind, wandering the hallways and striding along the open balconies in the typical Dawn Court dresses. They were rather like what she often wore anyway. This could be a good place for her to have the space to grow and develop. There was no harshness here, and he knew that she would be able to make real friends here. He would be able to trust that she would be safe here, and that wasn’t nothing. 

By the time they had returned to their room before dinner, he had decided that he would ask her what she thought of the whole idea. She had liked each court, and he knew that she had been able to see the beauty in each of them. He knew that she wanted a home of her own, she had once told him that while she knew she would always be welcome in the Night Court because Feyre was the High Lady, she knew that it wasn’t her home. 

Perhaps this could be.


	110. Chapter One Hundred and Ten

**Chapter 110**

The letter from Rhysand arrived the next day, and Elain watched Lucien take it from Thesan almost apprehensively, and she wondered what he thought it might say. Reaching a hand out to him under the table, she tilted her head when his eyes slid to hers. 

“What is it?” she asked, her hand resting on his thigh.

He just shook his head, and she knew that he didn’t wish to say whatever it was that he had been thinking in front of anyone else. He looked back up and down the table, and Elain’s eyes followed his. Thesan and several members of his court were all seated at the table for the midday meal, and she just nodded. Lucien opened the letter and his metallic eye clicked and whirred. She felt a wall of panic slam into her down the bond then and her eyes widened as she looked at him. After a moment Lucien lowered the letter, his face as calm and neutral as ever, but she could hear his heart and knew that he was doing an excellent job of hiding how he felt from everyone else. Ever the courtier, she supposed. 

“Lucien?”

He passed her the letter without a word and Elain read it.   
_  
Lucien,_

_I am glad that you and Thesan escaped Connal without permanent injury. I apologise for not thinking that you might need further support after what had happened previously. Thesan has offered to send a few of his Peregryn Legion to escort you to the Day Court in case there is further need of assistance._

_You are expected in the Day Court three days from now. Helion has arranged escort from the Dawn border._

_I have heard that Eris and your mother are currently visiting the Day Court as well. Just figured you would want to be made aware of that._

_Please let Elain know that once she has completed her draft, Amren has agreed to edit before we move to further publish. She has already been compensated for this favour._

_Rhys  
_

Not understanding why Lucien was so panicked, she looked up at him again. His hand was clenched around his goblet and he was taking slow and deliberate breaths. Setting the letter, now folded, down on the table between them, Elain reached out and took his hand, prying it from his goblet and holding it gently in her own. Lucien looked again at her, and she realised that it was the prospect of facing Helion, now knowing that he was Helion’s son.

Thesan was watching them and, when it became apparent that Lucien wasn’t about to say anything, Elain turned her attention to the High Lord. “We are to head for the Day Court in three days’ time.” She said brightly, “If we might remain here until then, we would be most thankful.” 

“Of course.”

“Thank you.” She glanced at Lucien again, “I think that Lucien and I might retreat for the afternoon, we have a few things to discuss…”

Thesan nodded and Elain got to her feet, picking the letter up with one hand and drawing Lucien to his own feet with the other. She could still hear his heart beating far too quickly, but his face remained impassive as he allowed Elain to lead him from the room. 

By the time they got back to their room and Elain had closed the door, she was growing uneasy. She hadn’t ever known him to be this quiet or restrained and worry began to gnaw at her. Turning to face him, she watched as he strode for the bed. 

“Lucien…?”

He turned to face her and then his neutral mask cracked and anxiety was clear in every line of his face. He sank down and Elain thought he meant to sit on the bed, but he went further until he was sitting on the floor, his back against the bed. “I…” he covered his face with his hands and Elain moved toward him. “I know this is ridiculous.” He muttered, his voice muffled by his hands. 

“I don’t think so.” She moved to sit on the bed behind him, a leg either side of his shoulders, and she reached a hand out to his hair, stroking him gently. “You’re worried about Helion…”

“I didn’t expect to react this way, but when I read that we will be there in three days…” he paused, “I still haven’t even thought about what I will say to him. If I would say anything at all…”

“And your mother and Eris will be there…”

He looked up then. “Yes… I… I just don’t know…”

Elain settled her hands on his shoulders, leaning into him and feeling him press back against her. Slowly, she ran her hands over him, across his shoulders and then down the front of his chest, leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek. “You don’t have to do it alone.” She told him gently. “You never have to face anything alone ever again…”

She felt his breath hitch as she wrapped her arms around him, and a rush of affection washed over her down the bond. One of Lucien’s large hands came to rest against her own arm across his chest and he nodded. He turned his head to look at her and Elain smiled at him. “Tell me that again.” He murmured and she smiled more widely. 

“I will be there with you…” She said, squeezing him gently. “If you choose to talk to him about it or not…”

Lucien nodded, his eyes flicking over her face quickly. “Do you think she would have told him?”

“Your mother?”

He nodded again and Elain thought about it. She had no idea what she would have done personally, if she had been married to someone but had an affair with someone else and bore that child in secret, raising that child to believe that he had been a legitimate son of her husband. “I don’t know.” She murmured. “I suppose Beron might have forbidden it…”

“That is what I assumed.” He replied, “Claiming I was his to protect his reputation would hardly work if my mother was allowed to tell Helion the truth…”

“But Beron is dead…”

“And she is in the Day Court.” His eyes, russet and gold, continued to move over her face.

“She might tell him…”

“Maybe.”

“Do you hope she does?”

“I… don’t know.”

Elain slid her hands down his chest again, leaning forward to press herself to his back. She could feel how stiffly he was holding himself and she smiled. “You know…” she murmured, lips against his ear, “Thesan gave me something before lunch…”

“What?” he turned his head to look at her again and she slid a hand into her dress pocket, pulling out a small vial of honey golden liquid. “What is that?”

“Oil.” She replied, “From that flower he saw me sketching yesterday.”

“Oh…” She saw the moment Lucien caught on to what she was suggesting and an instant later he had pulled his shirt off, tossing it away dramatically. “You should probably take that dress off.” He said, a smile tugging at his lips, “Wouldn’t want to get any on it…”

He wasn’t wrong, so Elain quickly went about untying the laces of her dress. She had tugged it off and set it nearby on the bed, shuffling back to the edge, to Lucien, in only her underwear. Lucien had quickly braided his hair and tucked it up, out of the way, and Elain grinned. She settled, as she had been before, with a leg either side of his shoulders as he leaned back against her and the bed, smiling as he made an appreciative sound. “Here…” she began, tipping a small amount of the oil into one hand and then quickly rubbing her hands together to spread and heat the oil before she returned her hands to Lucien’s shoulders. “It smells good…”

“It does.” His words came out with a soft groan as she set about kneading her fingers into his muscles. “Oh… beautiful mate…”

Laughing lightly, Elain leaned forward, around him, to press a kiss to his cheek, right over his scar. A flush of pleasure reached her down the bond as she straightened, working her fingers down to his collarbones. “You are indeed…” 

“I was talking about you, Petal.”

“I know.” She slid her hands down his chest, leaning into him again, liking the feel of his strong back against her chest as her hands moved over the rest of his firm body. When he gave a low chuckle, Elain suspected that he had somehow gleaned something of her thoughts through the bond. 

“Are you objectifying me, Petal?” there was still laughter in his voice, but Elan felt herself blush anyway. 

“Of course not.” She breathed, unable to make herself stop running her hands over him. 

“That’s a shame.”

“Is it?” she pressed her lips to his cheek again. Her hands continued to move over him as she moved her lips to his neck, earning another groan from him. Elain grinned, licking at his skin the way he always did to her, and then felt his warm hands on her ankles, sliding up her legs slowly. “What are you doing?” she asked, giggling a little when he shifted his shoulders under her knees. Lucien just lifted one of his hands, holding it out for one of hers and she took it. “… what?”

Lucien’s only response was to suddenly stand up, taking Elain with him, balanced on his shoulders, and holding her upright with his firm grip on the hand she had given him. Elain squealed. “Lucien!”

He laughed, spinning around and lifting his other hand for her to take hold of, and she did immediately. “Got you.” He chucked and Elain squealed again.

“Don’t drop me…” Elain held tightly to him, unable to help laughter bubbling out of her. 

“Never.” He replied, “What do you think Thesan would think if we went out to join them for dinner like this?” He strode toward the door and Elain let out a shriek. 

“No…” She cried, tugging at his hands. “I’m not wearing a dress…” 

Lucien laughed again and turned back around, walking back across the room toward the bed. “We couldn’t have that…”

“No…” she smiled, looking around at the floor. It looked such a long distance away and made her slightly dizzy. She held more tightly to Lucien’s hands. “Please don’t drop me…”

“I never would, my love.” His voice was so matter of fact, that Elain believed him, and relaxed. She gave another shriek, this time in laughter, when Lucien began a strange sort of dance, bobbing here and there as he moved around the room. When he reached the bed, he turned and sat down, releasing Elain’s hands and allowing her to drop harmlessly to the mattress. She had scrambled to her knees almost instantly and wrapped her arms around him from behind, pressing another kiss to his cheek. 

“Back on the floor.” She murmured, “I haven’t finished with you…”

“Oh, I like the sound of that…” he snickered but, as Elain watched, he moved obediently into the position he had been in before and she shuffled closer, tipping more oil into her hand. She warmed it, as she had the first time, before sliding her hands carefully across his shoulders. She felt a shiver from him, both beneath her hands and down the bond, and she began working her fingers into his tight muscles.


	111. Chapter One Hundred and Eleven

**Ch 111**

The next few days were spent rather pleasantly around the Dawn Court. Lucien still hadn’t worked out what he planned to say to Helion when arriving in the Day Court, but he had managed not to panic like he had when he had first received Rhys’ letter every time he thought about it. He knew that Elain was trying to help him with it, because every evening when they had crawled into bed, she had pulled out the book on the Day Court that she had gotten for him, and they had read a new chapter. There wasn’t really anything he hadn’t known as it had all been things he had been aware of as emissary for the Spring Court, or things he had learned himself on his own visits to the Day Court, but Elain had learned a lot, and he appreciated the effort she was going to to try and help him.

He hadn’t yet broached the subject with her about the possibility of seeing the Dawn Court as their home, but he still planned on asking her for her thoughts. For the few days they had spent around the court with nothing attacking them or demanding their attention, he had enjoyed the way he had been able to spend time with Elain, and if the routine they had come up with had the possibility of being any kind of normal, he knew that it could be a good life. Although, he figured, any life with Elain would be a good life. 

When she had finished packing her bag, he slung his own over his shoulder and headed for the door to the hallway. Elain followed him, and they headed downstairs to where Thesan had said he would see them off.

“Aelius and the others are outside. They will take you to the border.” The High Lord told them, and Lucien nodded.

“Thank you. We do appreciate it.”

“It is the least I could do.” Thesan’s brown eyes looked between him and Elain for several moments. “Don’t forget, if you wish to return… You would be welcome.”

“We would like to come back.” Elain said, glancing at Lucien before looking back to Thesan, “Well, I know I would.” She smiled, “Your court is beautiful.” 

“I definitely would, too.” Lucien agreed, “This has been, apart from the obvious, quite a relaxing time.”

“Apart from the obvious.” Thesan agreed, smiling.

*

As they strolled through the court toward the border, Elain couldn’t help trying to look at absolutely everything. She had been unconscious on their trip in to the palace the first time, and she had missed much of this. Taking Lucien’s hand, she bounced alongside him and he slanted a glance at her. 

“You seem… excited.” He said, his tone accusing.

“I didn’t get to see this when we arrived.”

“True…” he looked at her again, “You like the Dawn Court…”

“Of course.” She grinned, “It’s lovely.” Sensing apprehension from him then, Elain tightened her hand around his. “You have considered Thesan’s offer? You could belong here…”

“Do you think I could?” He sounded hesitant, “What do you think about the possibility?”

“I think…” Elain mused, pausing to consider as Aelius and his Peregryns moved ahead of them on the path. “that Thesan sees you for what you are.”

“And what is that?”

Raising an eyebrow, Elain pulled Lucien around to a stop. He blinked at her in surprise and she moved closer. Lifting both of her hands to cup his face, she met his eyes. That metallic eye clicked and whirred and she could feel the surprise coming off of him now. “A strong male.” She said, holding his gaze, “Who is clever and kind and good…” She just looked at him, as he appeared to try and read her face. 

“Is that what you see?” he asked, his voice soft as his hands came to rest on her waist.

“Yes.” She replied simply, “That is what you are.”

“Is it…”

“Yes.” Elain let her hands slide to his shoulders, “And Thesan sees it too.” She ran one of her hands down his chest. “He sees your value.” She smiled, “And if you want to think about maybe spending time in the Dawn Court when we’re done with Rhys’ little reconnaissance … I think that we should talk about it.” She felt one of Lucien’s hands wind its way into her hair as he just looked at her.

“We…” he murmured and she nodded. 

“Wasn’t that clear?” She asked, “Would be a bit hard being mates if you were in a completely different court to me…” 

“It’s just… different to actually hear it.” There was fire in his russet eye when he bent a pressed a kiss to her forehead. “We should keep walking… before Aelius comes back to find us.”

“I suppose an escort isn’t very useful if we lose them…”

Elain took his hand again as they resumed their progress along the path. She wasn’t sure how she would actually feel, being separated from her sisters if she did move to another court, but she knew that she would survive. It wasn’t as if she would be on her own, anyway. She would have Lucien. They would be properly mated by then, and she would be happy. She could feel that in her core.

*

As they approached the border for the Day Court, Lucien’s stomach twisted. Elain tightened her hand on his, sliding closer to him and he bit his lip.

“Do you have a plan yet?” She asked, “For when you see him?”

“No plan.” Lucien forced the words out tightly, “Just panic.”

Elain slid her other hand up his arm to rest in the crook of his elbow. “Don’t panic…” she told him gently, “There’s no need…”

“There is.” He murmured, “Historically, whenever I am flustered, or don’t know what to say… my mouth just runs itself and the results aren’t always pleasant.”

“Helion isn’t going to rip your eye out because you say something awkward.” She told him, and he felt her pause, “Is he? From what we read, he doesn’t seem the type…”

“No, I doubt he would do that.” Lucien was pretty certain that the High Lord of the Day court was not into such things.

“You did tell me he was nice.”

“As far as I have seen, he has always been so.”

“There we go then.”

“It’s… not the fear of that.” He told her, “What if I say something that…” He felt Elain lean into him, one of her hands moving over his arm.

“Do you think you might say something that makes him decide he wants nothing to do with you?” The moment she had said it, Lucien knew that he did indeed fear that, and he nodded. “I doubt that could be the case. He and your mother had actual affection for one another, didn’t they?”

“I believe so.”

“Then I don’t see how he could not want to know you.”

“What if he thinks I’m a threat to his rule, and wants to eliminate me?”

Elain looked sharply up at him. “… is that…?” she broke off for a second, “The Day Court is different to the Autumn Court, isn’t it?”

“… Yes.”

“Feyre once told me that the Autumn Court is known for being cutthroat…”

“It is.”

“Well, let’s not assume that Helion would try to kill you just because you might be a threat to his rule.”

Nodding again, Lucien knew that she was right. “Habit, I guess…”

“Not everyone wants to kill you.” She told him, her smile teasing. 

Raising an eyebrow, Lucien tilted his head. “How novel.” That was a world which he would have to get used to living in. There had always been the threat of someone wanting him gone, ever since he had left the Autumn Court and three of his brothers had come after him. Even before then, he supposed. As a youngling, he had hid from them, fearing what they would do if they found him, how far they would go with their games. It seemed bizarre now, that nobody wanted him dead. 

After several moments, he noticed that Elain was walking strangely, and looking at her feet. “…what… is the matter?” he asked, frowning. She came to a stop, clinging to his arm with one hand, as she reached for her shoe. 

“I… think my sock has a hole in it…” she murmured, before adding with a growl, “And my foot is exploring…”

Smiling, Lucien just helped her balance as she took her shoe off and adjusted her sock.

When Elain linked her fingers through his, interlocking their hands, he looked back down at her. Aelius gave a wave, telling them that the border was right ahead, and that he hoped they would return soon. Lucien smiled at him, and then led Elain across the border and into the court ruled by his true father, into the Day Court.


	112. Chapter One Hundred and Twelve

**Chapter 112**

The Day Court was magnificent. Elain knew that her eyes were wide and her mouth was open as she took in the splendour before them. The palace and most of the buildings were made with a bright stone that seemed to reflect the sun, and the faeries that surrounded them, bustling about, were all dressed in linen in an array of pale colours such as white and ivory.   
As they approached the palace, Elain could hear Lucien’s heartbeat quicken. He had tightened his hold on her hand when they had crossed the border and Helion’s escort were there for them, and he hadn’t let go of her since. She could feel his anxiety building and she just hoped that he would be able to hold it together once they got face to face with the High Lord of the Day Court. She supposed that he would, as he was court-trained and really rather good at talking to people. 

Trying her best to balance her attention between Lucien, and everything around them, Elain tried not to be distracted by the faeries she saw passing them. Aside from their pale linen clothing, most wore vibrant golden jewellery inset with bright blue jewels and stones. She recognised lapis lazuli, although she had never seen it in such plentiful quantities.   
Passing one large building with several stairs before the huge double doors, Elain paused for a moment to look up at it. It was more than clear that this was one of the thousands of libraries that Lucien had told her about and which they had read about in the book on The Day Court. “The libraries Amarantha looted,” she began, “Have they been restored?”  
Lucien pulled gently at her hand to get her walking again, “I am not sure, actually.” He told her, “That is something we can ask Helion.” He smiled, “If they need help, I am sure Rhys would be happy to arrange something.”

“That does seem like what this whole trip was about.”

“Yes,” he agreed.

“Can we visit some anyway?”

“Of course.”

Elain grinned at him, still looking all around them. He had once said to her that she might be able to learn something about her Seer abilities in the libraries of the Day Court, and she hadn’t forgotten that. It was something that was high on her priority list, and she dearly wanted the chance to do so. 

The sun was everywhere, and everything was warm and golden. Glancing at Lucien out of the corner of her eye, she could easily see him looking as if he belonged here. That skin of his just about lit up in the golden sun, and his hair looked like molten metal, flames moving through it as it shifted in the air. “You look like the sun…” the words were out of her mouth before Elain had even had time to contemplate them, and her breath caught when his russet and golden eyes turned her way. She squeezed his hand, and they were ushered through a large gate, as she heard his heart thundering so loudly that she wondered if it hurt him. “Lucien,” she said softly, “remember that you’re not doing this on your own.”

“I know.” His voice was barely more than a whisper. “Thank you.”

The fae of Helion’s Court were stunning, and Elain couldn’t help her eyes lingering on each one of them as she noticed them in turn. They were all also wearing clothing that was of light linen, loose breezy dresses on the females, and what looked to be shorter skirt-type pieces on the males, some of whom were bare chested. Many were wearing similar lapis lazuli jewellery to that which she had noticed outside, but in here the pieces seemed much more elaborate. Nearly all of the males who were bare chested wore wide collar necklaces made up of tightly beaded rows of gems and beads, which were draped over them from breast to collarbone. Almost every faerie present had some kind of colourful beaded necklace with equally elaborate earrings. Elain also noticed that a few of them wore light looking sandals, while the rest appeared to be barefoot. 

When Lucien’s hand released hers and came to rest on the small of her back, Elain realised that her wonder and awe had been on display for all to see. She didn’t really mind, thinking that it would probably be nice for them to know that she found their home so wonderful to behold. She smiled at Lucien over her shoulder, walking slightly ahead of him into what she assumed was the reception room, or throne room, where she could only assume Helion would be waiting for them. They had been expected after all.

The throne room was even more breathtaking than the rooms and hallways they had just walked through. Several of the faeries they had passed followed them in and then dispersed around the edges of the room, no doubt seeking an ideal spot from which to watch their reception. As they approached the dais, Elain’s eyes were on the high windows, taking in the glorious colours that spilled into the room with the daylight when she heard Lucien’s sharp intake of breath. She thought she could practically feel his heart thundering in her own chest now and she cast another glance at him over her shoulder, reaching back to take his hand in hers once more, before she turned her own eyes on the dais and the faerie sitting there.   
Helion Spell-Cleaver was even more resplendent than Elain could have imagined. She wasn’t aware that she had gasped at the sight of him until Lucien was beside her, his hand tight on hers. The High Lord’s dark skin seemed to shine with an inner light and his amber eyes looked amused as he regarded them. She tried to stop staring at him, but found herself unable to. He truly was magnificent, with his strong muscular frame draped elegantly in white and gold in the fashion of the rest of his court, and his black hair glimmering in silky waves and a crown of golden spikes atop his head. The book that Elain had gotten for Lucien had described Helion as “The sun personified” and she rather thought that was beyond accurate.

A rush of emotion hit Elain down the bond from Lucien, and it shocked her out of her admiration of the High Lord before them. She could feel Lucien all but drowning in emotion and she turned her head his way. His face betrayed none of it, and she watched him as he smiled politely and gave a small bow of his head as etiquette required. 

“Welcome to the Court of Day.” Helion said, his voice as rich and bright as Elain would have expected. 

“Thank you.” Lucien replied, and Elain was impressed with how steady he sounded, especially considering that she knew that he most certainly did not feel that way. “I am certain you are aware of the reason for our visit. The High Lord of the Night Court requests that the Courts all keep one another updated on the progress within their borders in the interest of fostering stronger relationships and in seeking and receiving aide from one another, should it be required.”

“I am aware.”

“Also, The High Lord of the Night Court requests that Elain Archeron be given the freedom to move around the Court in her pursuit of appropriate flora for the book she is compiling, set to be published and distributed among the courts as a symbol of our strengthening friendship and respect for one another.”

“Yes.” Helion was smiling now. “This was also in the letter that Rhysand sent to me.” His amber eyes turned on Elain and she found that she could barely breathe under his gaze, “You have that freedom, Lady.”

“Thank you.” Elain bowed her own head. 

“I have a gift for you.” Helion’s words surprised Elain and she looked up quickly to see him gesture at a faerie standing near his throne. “I had it commissioned for you when I learned of your visit.” His amber eyes flicked from the faerie who had approached him, back to Elain and then he held a hand out to her, gesturing for her to approach him. 

“Oh…” Elain looked at Lucien who, after a moment of hesitation, released her hand. His eyes met hers and he nodded slightly. “I… am… honoured you would think to do such a thing…” she murmured, slowly approaching the dais. Helion smiled at her as he opened the box he had been given. Elain looked at what was inside when he tilted it toward her. “It’s beautiful.” She said gently. Inside the box was a golden anklet, accented with beads of Lapis Lazuli, Carnelian, Jasper, and Turquoise. 

“Faience beads. A symbol of your welcome in my Court.” Helion’s eyes moved past Elain and back to Lucien, “A symbol of our strengthening friendship and respect for one another.” Amber eyes returned to meet Elain’s gaze, and she just stared at him when he patted his knee. When she did nothing but blink, still staring at him, he did it again. “Your foot…” he said softly and Elain swallowed thickly. She dare not turn and look at Lucien, so she carefully lifted her foot. Her breath caught in her throat as she set it lightly upon the High Lord’s knee. This was scandalous, she thought. Here she was, in front of the entire Day Court, setting her dirty shoe upon the knee of their extremely attractive High Lord. Somebody was going to reprimand her, she knew it. Nobody said anything, however, and Elain could do nothing but watch as Helion took the anklet from its box and unclasped it, before setting it carefully around her ankle. She couldn’t breathe as his warm fingers grazed her skin lightly as he tightened the clasp and then adjusted the anklet to fall to best advantage. “Lovely.” He said, eyes lifting to her face once more. 

“… Thank you.” Her words were barely a whisper, and she retreated back down to stand beside Lucien as soon as she was able. Lucien took her hand, and Elain could feel the possessive nature of his grip on her all too easily. She ran her thumb over the back of his hand soothingly.

“Your rooms have been prepared for you.” Helion told them and Lucien stiffened beside Elain. 

“We only require one.” 

Helion smiled, his amber eyes flicking between them. “Of course.” He said, “I meant that a suite of rooms have been prepared for you.”

Elain felt Lucien relax, and she continued to stroke his hand in her own. This was going to be an interesting visit indeed.


	113. Chapter One Hundred and Thirteen

**Chapter 113**

Watching Elain braid her hair up off of her shoulders, Lucien tried to sort himself out. It had been easier than he had anticipated to keep himself in check when looking at Helion. As long as he had the formal role of the emissary to follow, he knew the rules and had etiquette to hide behind. He knew what to say and how to act and, if he was able to stick to that, everything would be fine.

“Do you think he knows?” Elain asked, her brown eyes meeting Lucien’s gaze in the mirror. 

“I… have no idea.” He replied. He had been wondering that himself. The High Lord had given no real indication that he was aware they were related at all, but then he had hardly expected the other male to just publicly announce the fact to the Court the moment they met. Perhaps he did know, Lucien thought. Maybe that had been the meaning behind Helion’s repeating his words about fostering friendship and trust. But then, why had he been so… tactile… with Elain. Lucien’s eyes flickered down to look at the beaded anklet that she still wore. It wasn’t uncommon, he supposed, for the Courts to bestow gifts upon other visiting important guests, but Helion had hardly needed Elain to put her foot into his lap so that he could put the jewellery on her like that in front of everyone. Perhaps he didn’t know, after all, and had just wanted to flirt with a pretty female. The High Lord was known for his fondness for taking a wide array of lovers into his bed. Unable to help himself, a snarl slipped out of Lucien and Elain raised her eyebrows at him. 

“What is the matter?”

“Nothing.”

Securing her braid, Elain turned around to face him properly, still sitting at the vanity. “I can feel your jealousy.”

“And I’m trying not to acknowledge it.” He muttered, “Because I know it’s unfounded and ridiculous.”

“Mmm.” Elain got to her feet and moved toward him, “Another male had his hands on me…” her voice was low, and Lucien’s eyes locked onto her as she moved. He couldn’t so much as blink let alone look away. “It’s unsurprising that you weren’t impressed.”

His hands came up to her slim shoulders, and he drew her into himself, holding her pressed against his body. “It didn’t matter that he was my father.” He murmured, lips against her hair, “I didn’t like it.”

“Do you think he did it on purpose?”

“I have no idea.” He told her, “He is known to… enjoy a wide range of lovers…”

“Feyre told me that Mor…”

“Yes…”

Elain nodded, resting her cheek against his chest. “You know I wouldn’t.”

“I know.” He stroked a hand down her back, “I didn’t think you would. My blood just heats at the thought of anyone else’s hands on you.”

“Really?” she looked up at him then, and his heart quickened at the look on her face. “Mine heats at the thought of _your_ hands on me…”

“Well…” He allowed his hands to slide down Elain’s back to her waist where he continued to hold her pressed into himself. “that is interesting to know.”

“I haven’t seen your mother or Eris…”

“Neither have I…” Lucien said softly, resting his chin atop Elain’s head.

“You know…” Elain’s voice was muffled against his shirt, “We have to go back to the Winter Court…”

“Do we?” He asked. “Why?”

“Well, once I let you have your way with me here…” she tilted her head to look up at him, “The Winter Court will be the only Court we haven’t…”

“Uh…” Lucien needed a moment to understand what she had just said, surprised that she would even have thought about that, let alone noticed it. “Let me have my way with you…?”

“Maybe,” Elain’s smile twisted, “maybe I’ll have _my_ way with _you_ …”

“Oh, Petal.” He grinned, his hands pulling her hips against his own, “You can have me any which way you like…”

“I know.”

“I’m glad.” He pressed his lips to her forehead, pulling back reluctantly after a few moments, “But not right now…” He let her go, “We’re free until sunset, so why don’t we go and have a look at that library?”

*

The library was bigger than any Elain had seen before. Excitement stirred in her when Lucien walked her through the doors and the smell of books hit her. She took his hand, tugging him toward the nearby stairs. “Know where you’re going, Petal?” he asked, amusement clear in his voice and Elain shook her head. 

“Not really, but I feel like we should go up…”

“Good enough for me.”

She let her eyes wander, taking in the golden stone that made up the place, accented with brightly coloured walls, some of which she was sure were inlaid with lapis lazuli as they went up the staircase. Huge windows lined the walls of the upper level, and golden sunshine filtered through. 

“Illuminating.” Lucien muttered, and Elain could hear amusement in his voice. “Is the light a metaphor?” She turned her head toward him, “… for the knowledge for which one comes to a library…” he laughed to himself and Elain raised an eyebrow at him.

“You did spend most of your childhood in a library, didn’t you…?”

Lucien sent her a mock hurt look. “Is that a bad thing?”

“No…”

When they reached the top of the stairs, Elain turned left and moved down the nearby aisle. Lucien followed her, and she wondered why she was going this way. “You’re looking for books on Seers?” he asked, and she nodded. 

“I guess I somehow know where…”

She found the shelf she wanted without any trouble, and ran her fingers along several of the spines. This appeared to be a whole section on rare abilities. “If Amarantha hasn’t taken them all…”

“Was that something she was after?”

“She wanted anything that would give her more power. Understanding how Seer abilities worked would have helped her control any seers she happened to find, and use their abilities to her own purposes…”

Taking one of the books from the shelves, Elain flipped it open and looked up at Lucien. “I don’t suppose we can actually borrow anything…” She hadn’t thought about that. They had only just arrived, and she didn’t think that a library would allow just anyone to walk out with their books.

“We can get that sorted tomorrow.” Lucien replied, his warm hand coming to settle against her back as she looked back down at the book. “We can make a list of which one’s you’d like to have a closer look at…”

“Yes…” Elain began taking books down and then Lucien had taken them from her, holding the pile as she looked for more. After a few minutes they moved to a nearby table and Elain grinned when Lucien pulled some paper and a pen from his jacket. 

They spent the better part of the next hour flicking through the books, reading contents pages and indexes and making note of which books they might potentially learn something from. It was almost overwhelming, the amount of titles she had written down, until she remembered that the Day Court had thousands of libraries, and this was only one, and then it became entirely overwhelming. Lucien’s hand covered hers atop the paper and he smiled when she lifted her eyes to his face. 

“You don’t have to read them all in a day.” He said softly, “You have all the time in the world.”

“True.” She mused, stacking the books back up. Lucien lifted them into his arms as Elain tucked the list away into her dress pocket and they went to return the books to their proper place. 

“We still have some time before sunset and dinner…” 

“We do…” Elain agreed.

“Do you want to have a look at the books on flowers…?”

“They would have quite a few that Rhys would not…” She found the idea very tempting. 

“I would put money on that.” He winked at her when she looked up at him. “… If I gambled.”

They headed up the aisle again, this time Elain letting Lucien guide her. “When do you suppose Helion will want to talk to you?”

“I guess he will let me know at dinner.” He replied, and Elain nodded. “Likely Eris and my mother would be there too…”

Taking his hand gently, Elain tried to reach for the bond, wanting to know how he was feeling about that. She got a faint sense of apprehension, but also eagerness. That made sense, she figured. He would clearly be eager to see his mother again, and the apprehension was likely due to whether or not she would have told Helion about him. 

“Remember…” she said, her fingers stroking the back of his hand softly, “You won’t have to do it alone.”


	114. Chapter One Hundred and Fourteen

**Chapter 114**

Lucien slipped in front of Elain, putting himself between her and Helion as they entered the large dining hall they had been summoned to for dinner. The High Lord strode toward them, a welcoming smile on his handsome face, and Lucien tried not to seem as if he was staring, searching the other male’s face for any sign of resemblance.

“Lucien and Elain…” Helion reached them and smiled more widely. 

“Good evening.” Lucien kept his body between his mate the High Lord.

“I am told that you visited one of our libraries this afternoon.”

“We did.”

“How did you find it?”

Nodding, Lucien slid a hand around Elain’s waist, keeping her close. “It was quite impressive. We were actually hoping that Elain might be able to borrow some books while we are here…”

“Of course. I will have it seen to.” Helion’s amber eyes slid toward Elain, and Lucien was thankful when one of Elain’s hands reached for one of his own. He could feel her down the bond, seeking to soothe him, keep him calm. Glancing her way for a moment, Lucien gave her a thankful smile. “If you would both like to take a seat at the table,” Helion went on, “Dinner is due to be served any moment now.” He indicated the table, with several vacant chairs nearby. 

“Thank you.” Elain’s voice was gentle, and she squeezed Lucien’s hand, signalling to him to move toward the table. He went with her, choosing some of the empty chairs and seating himself beside her. Helion was sitting on Lucien’s other side, and Lucien tried his hardest to stop himself from constantly looking the other male over. His eyes kept catching on Helion’s nose however, and he couldn’t help but see the similarity to his own. 

“Lucien…” Eris voice had Lucien’s head snapping up to see his brother sit down on the opposite side of the table. 

“Eris…” Even as he said his brother’s name, Lucien’s eyes were scanning the table and the room, looking for his mother. If Eris had come to dinner, then his mother should have as well. He smiled when he saw her walk into the dining hall, her long red hair fanning out behind her as she moved. She strode toward Eris and took a seat beside him, her russet eyes meeting Lucien’s a moment later. 

“Lucien… Elain…” those eyes, so like his own, slid to Elain for a few seconds, before flicking Helion’s way. “Good evening to you all…” She fell silent, and her gaze dropped to her empty plate before her. Lucien resisted a frown, his own eyes sliding to Eris whose expression mirrored his.

“How are you?” Lucien asked his mother, looking at her once again. She had only ever shrunk like that when she knew that Beron would disapprove of something she had been about to say or do. She had tried her best to avoid disapproval from her High Lord, but Beron was dead now. Was she doing the same thing for Eris? Judging from the look on Eris’ face, Lucien doubted that. As much as he had always tried to avoid his eldest brother, Lucien knew that Eris was not like Beron.

“I am well…” His mother smiled gently at him, and Lucien’s heart eased just a little. “I am glad to see you well…” His heart stuttered at those words, and he swallowed thickly. He had not yet had the chance to apologise to her and tell her he was sorry that she had lost three more of her sons. Elain’s hand came to rest on his thigh under the table and he cast her a quick glance before leaning forward and stretching his hand as far across the table as he could. After a moment, his mother shifted forward in her own chair and stretched to reach him, taking his hand gently. Her eyes met his then and she gave him a gentle smile. “I really am glad to see you well.” She said, and Lucien nodded. She released him then and sat straighter in her chair, and Lucien did the same. 

“So, what brings you here?” He directed his words at Eris then. 

“Rhysand isn’t the only High Lord interested in intercourt relations…”

“You don’t have an emissary?” Lucien asked and Eris shook his head. 

“Not yet.”

“Anyone in mind?” Lucien didn’t miss Eris’ gaze flicker quickly to their mother and then back. 

“Not especially…” Running a hand through his hair, Eris sighed lightly, “I… am in the middle of a rather extensive overhaul of the way things work in the Autumn Court.”

Lucien could believe that. “I’ll bet.”

Most of the conversations around the table died then as several platters full of various kinds of fruit were lay before them on the table. Beside him, Elain leaned forward curiously, and he could feel her excitement as she took in the colourful platters. 

“I… don’t think I have seen many of these fruits before.” She said softly, and Lucien smiled at her. “…what is that?”

“I think that’s a sliced dragonfruit.” He replied, frowning at the platter. 

“Ooh.” Elain reached forward and began selecting a few pieces of everything she could see, arranging them all neatly on her plate. Lucien took a few pieces of fruits he remembered enjoying the last time he had visited the Day court and set about eating quietly. 

Glancing at Helion again, he noticed the High Lord’s attention was split between his own plate and Ashk. Slanting a glance across the table at his mother, Lucien saw his mother in much the same position. Her russet eyes continually moved from her plate to Helion and then back to her plate. He wondered if they had had the chance to speak alone since his mother and Eris had arrived. Not specifically about _him_ , but just a chance to talk with one another, without anyone else around and listening to them. He hoped they got that chance before too long.

After dinner, when everyone was milling around the dining hall and spilling into the sitting room through the nearby door, Lucien took the chance to approach his mother who was standing by a window. “Are you really okay?” he asked her, slipping an arm around her shoulders when she smiled up at him, reaching for one of his hands. 

“I am.”

“I am sorry…” he told her softly. “I really am… for Malak and Tallan and Connal…”

His mother squeezed his hand. “I know… and I know that they attacked you.”

“They were still your sons.”

“They were.” One of her hands came up to stroke at his shirt, smoothing it over his chest. “And I will mourn them for a time to come. But, I am happy that you are alright. You and Elain…”

“We are both just fine.” He hesitated, before going on, his voice low. “She wants to accept the bond…”

Ashk’s smile was bright when she looked up at him. “Of course she does.” She said. “She loves you. That was clear from the first time I met her when you first brought her to the Autumn Court.”

“Was it?” Lucien asked, trying to remember. He had only just kissed her in the Spring Court that first time, and then they had gone to the Autumn Court. He remembered his hope that Elain would feel something like that for him, but it certainly had not been obvious to him then. Maybe he had tried to prevent himself believing it in case it had turned out to not be true. “You knew?”

“Yes.” His mother replied, “She was more concerned with you than anything else going on around her.”

Lucien smiled. “Well…” he said softly, “It’s clear to me now…” His eyes scanned the room for Elain, and he felt himself stiffen when he saw Helion standing with her, taking animatedly about something he could not make out. His mother’s hand stroked his arm gently. 

“I spoke with Helion.” She said, and he could hear the hesitation in her voice. Lucien wanted to turn and look at her, but couldn’t take his eyes off of Elain. His whole body was screaming at him to go to her, to get her away from the male standing over her. “He… he is aware… that he is… your father.”

Lucien looked at his mother then. “He is?”

“Yes.”

“… and what is he doing right now?”

“… speaking with Elain?”

Lucien tried not to snarl, and his mother gave a light sigh. “Oh?”

“That’s the bond, Lucien.” She said gently, “That possessiveness… it’s the bond. Helion is not doing anything that should cause you alarm.”

Swallowing, he ran a hand through his hair. “If you say so.”

“Trust me.” She said, “I know him.”

He looked at her again. “Yes, you do…” he mused. “Did you come here to tell him that?”

“Yes.”

“Does Eris know that’s why?”

“Yes.”

“And he supports that?”

“He does. If Helion acknowledges you as his son and heir, then you’re publicly not Beron’s son and that’s further distance between you and Eris’ throne.”

“He already had me publicly deny any claim.”

“And this would further that.”

“I see.”

“….what… what was Helion’s reaction?” He asked, unsure if he really wanted to know the answer to that question. 

“He was surprised.” She said gently, “But he understood why I hadn’t been able to tell him earlier.”

“That’s good…” he murmured. 

“He said he was looking forward to your visit…”

Lucien’s eyes went back to the High Lord across the room. “I’m assuming we will have an interesting conversation tomorrow.” He glanced at his mother, finding her eyes locked on Helion across the room, and he hugged her closer with one arm around her. It was clear to him that there was affection there, and it pleased some part of him, knowing that he came from genuine love. Not everyone could make that claim.


	115. Chapter One Hundred and Fifteen

**Chapter 115**

The Day Court made Elain happy. She had decided this after about twenty minutes of walking around the next morning with Lucien. The faeries of the Day Court seemed friendly and open, and were all too happy to give a smile and stop to talk to them as they asked where they might find some flowers unique to their court. She and Lucien had wandered after breakfast, out of the palace and down the streets, and she had felt Lucien’s easiness as he took in everything around them. He hadn’t said much about his conversation with his mother the evening before, and he hadn’t asked her about what Helion had spoken to her about in the sitting room after dinner, but his hands on her had been possessive when they had retreated to their room once it was all over. Elain had decided that she liked that too, when they had climbed into bed and he had pulled her tightly to himself, his hands moving over her as if to reassure himself that she was there. They had fallen asleep only moments later, but Elain had woken with the sun with Lucien’s hands still on her.

As the sun came down on them, bright and warm, Elain looked up and around at Lucien when he slid an arm around her shoulders. “We should head back…” his voice was soft and she squinted at his expression in the golden light. 

“What’s the matter?” She tucked her little book back into her dress pocket, and Lucien shook his head. 

“Nothing is the matter.” He replied, “Helion has made time to speak to me about the Day Court this morning.” He gave her a nervous smile, “Wouldn’t want to keep him waiting…”

Sliding her arm around Lucien’s waist, she leaned in to him. His heart seemed to beat faster as they made their way back toward the palace and she began rubbing small circles into his side as she listened to it beat. “So, he knows…”

“Apparently so.” Lucien’s voice was slightly clipped, and Elain could feel his nervousness swirling within him. 

“Do you think he will bring it up while you’re talking about other things?”

“I couldn’t say, Petal.”

“Will you bring it up?”

“Hmm.” Lucien pressed a soft kiss to her temple, “I don’t know.”

Elain let it drop, feeling Lucien’s apprehension growing. She figured he needed the time to sort it out in his head before he had to come face to face with Helion. Neither of them said anything further on their way back to the palace, where they were then shown to the throne room as they had been the day before.

Helion was seated on his throne and he got to his feet when Elain walked in with Lucien by her side. “Ahh, you’ve returned.” The High Lord smiled at them as he approached. “I hear you’ve been exploring this morning.”

“We went for a walk.” Lucien agreed, and Elain took his hand gently.

“Excellent.” Helion’s amber eyes flicked from Lucien to Elain and then back to Lucien. “Lucien, if you would join me.” He said, “We can begin our discussions on the progress of the Day Court.” He looked to Elain again, “And for the Lady, I have organised something special… a fitting for some traditional Day Court attire…” Elain blinked as the High Lord’s gaze moved over her for a second. 

“I…” She held more tightly to Lucien’s hand. She had promised him that he wouldn’t have to face this conversation with his father alone. “Lucien…”

“It’s okay.” Helion smiled, “You’ll be taken care of.” He winked at her, “I’ve charged my own tailor with the task.”

Elain’s breath caught in her throat. She looked to Lucien. “I…”

“It’s okay.” Lucien turned his eyes, russet and gold, her way. “It’s okay, Elain.”

“No…” she breathed, squeezing his hand. “I said I wouldn’t…” She broke off when he lifted his free hand to her cheek. She could feel him trying to soothe her and she met his gaze. 

“You’re not breaking any promise to me.” He murmured, bending to press a kiss to her cheek. “I can do it.” He told her, “I want to talk to him…”

Elain wrapped an arm around his neck and pressed a kiss of her own to his cheek. “Okay…” When they straightened, she turned her eyes back on Helion who was looking at them with an interested and amused smile. “If you can leave him for an hour…” Elain nodded, and Helion lifted a hand to indicate a door over to the right. “You’ll find everything set up right through there…”

Making herself smile, Elain nodded again. “Alright. Thank you…” She moved for the door, looking back at Lucien as she did so. She hoped that he truly wasn’t feeling abandoned by her, and that his conversation with Helion went as he wanted it to.

*

Swallowing his nervousness, Lucien walked with Helion through another hallway. The High Lord cast a glance at him and Lucien forced a courtly smile. “It’s just through here. I figured this room would be most comfortable. Did you bring everything you need?”

“I did.” Lucien withdrew his notes as Helion opened a door and ushered him into a room with a large round table in the centre. Letting his eyes move around the room, Lucien took it all in. There was a large golden sun on the roof, directly over the table, and the walls were a deep blue with golden beams, he supposed were intended to be sun rays, spilling across them and down to the floor, radiating out from that sun in the roof. “Oh…”

“Impressive, isn’t it?” Helion strode for a nearby chair and flung himself down in it, lounging elegantly as he turned those amber eyes on Lucien once more. “Please, sit.”

Stiffly, Lucien moved for a chair of his own, pulling it out from the table and sinking in to it, placing his book on the table and his pen beside it. “So…” he began, trying to avoid looking at Helion. “What would be the first thing that you would like the High Lord of the Night Court to be aware of?”

“That we have received word from Kallias, and we have already begun negotiations to open a trade route with the Winter Court.”

“Oh?” Lucien flipped open his book, and made a note. “And, is this something you want to open to all the courts?”

“Of course.”

When Lucien glanced up, he found Helion’s eyes on him. Unable to meet that gaze, he looked back down at what he was writing. “I’m assuming that this would require each Court to contribute to the development and upkeep of the routes…” he paused, making another note. “Did you and Kallias have any plans for what that contribution would be?”

“Those who can offer fae to work on it may do so, and those who do not have any to spare will instead make a monetary contribution.”

Lucien had figured as much, but he nodded nonetheless, and made a note of it. “Assuming you’re open to discussions of the size of that contribution.”

“Of course.”

Helion’s eyes were still on Lucien when he looked up again and Lucien forgot what he had been about to ask next. 

“Elain is your mate…?”

Bristling at that, Lucien nodded. “I thought that was clear.”

“Yes…” Helion’s voice was smooth, “Sister to the High Lady of the Night Court, and a Seer…”

“What of it?” He knew his tone was sharp, but Lucien didn’t care. Images of Helion’s hands on Elain’s ankle from the day before flashed through his mind. 

“It’s just…” Helion’s eyes moved over him quickly as the High Lord paused, “… Interesting.”


	116. Chapter One Hundred and Sixteen

**Chapter 116**

Staring at Helion, Lucien blinked, willing his heart to slow its rapid pace. “Why?” he asked, his voice sounding far more calm than he felt. “Why is that interesting? Do you think that someone like her couldn’t be mated to someone like me?”

Helion raised an eyebrow in question. “Someone like you?”

Lucien barely blinked. “I’m…” he didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t who he had always thought he was, and he didn’t really know who he was now at all. “… an exile.”

Leaning back in his chair, Helion steepled his fingers together as he looked at Lucien who felt restless under that amber gaze. “It seems to me that you’re an intelligent and highly trained courtier, who has made himself useful no matter where he has gone.”

Not knowing how to respond to that, Lucien remained silent for several moments. Eventually, his brain began to work again and he forced himself to swallow before he was able to speak. “Why is it interesting that Elain is my mate, then?”

“Because she is so… powerful.” Helion said softly, and Lucien tilted his head. “She could only ever be the mate of a High Lord’s son…” He knew, Lucien reminded himself. Helion knew who they were to one another. He also knew that the other male wasn’t referring to him as Beron’s son.

“What are you getting at?”

“You handle yourself well…” Helion told him and Lucien resisted narrowing his eyes at him. “Even when you are angry, you show nothing of it on your face.”

“That’s rarely the case.” Lucien said, indicating the left side of his face, and the scar Amarantha had given him when she had ripped his eye out. “Usually I just say exactly what I think.”

“Yet you are capable of measured responses. Your mother has trained you well.” Lucien saw Helion’s expression soften just a little.

“You…” he began as it dawned on him what Helion had been doing, “you were testing me…”

The High Lord gave a small grin. “Ah…”

“Touching Elain… you… you wanted to see my reaction!”

“As you say,” Helion began, “You tend to say exactly what is on your mind and you do have a reputation for being a little… unconventional.” Lucien just blinked at him. “I… wanted to see for myself.”

“Why?” Lucien was tired of playing. He just wanted answers.

“Your mother…” Helion lifted a hand to run through his black hair. “She spoke to me about you…”

“I know.”

Helion’s eyes met his then and the High Lord was silent for several moments. “You… are my son.”

“I know…” Lucien could barely breathe. 

“I… do not have any other children.” Helion said. “It seemed a faster way of getting to know who you are.”

“So you thought you would put your hands on my mate…”

“Yes.” Helion looked him over, “I wanted to see if you yielded to reason or if your reaction was more… suited to what I imagine would come out of the Autumn Court.”

“You wanted to see if I was a savage?”

“You were raised thinking you were Beron’s son… and then you spent time in the Spring Court, and we are all aware of Tamlin’s inner… wildness.”

Lucien couldn’t tell if he was meant to be insulted by this assessment, or not. “And what did you decide?”

“That your mother trained you well. You’re reasonable and intelligent… and you have a great deal of self-control.”

“And what does that mean?” Lucien asked, “For your little test?”

“That you could make a good High Lord.”

“What?” Lucien stared at him. Surely he’d misheard.

“I said before, I don’t have any other children.” Helion said, “And, until Ashk told me of you, I was unaware I had any at all.” Helion’s gaze dropped to his hands for a moment. “I would very much like to get to know you better… If that is something that you would also want to do.”

“Yes.” Lucien had responded before he’d even had the chance to consider. Helion smiled briefly. “…did you love my mother?”

“I…” the High Lord smiled again. “Yes… I have been unable to see her since…” Amber eyes moved over Lucien, “Well, since you were born. I suppose that is when Beron learned of our relationship and began to keep her from me.”

“And now?” Lucien asked. 

“I am thankful that she has come here to speak to me… that she told me about you… that she is here.”

“Do you still love her?”

Helion looked at him solemnly. “That would be easier to answer honestly after we have had the chance to spend some time together and relearn who one another is after all this time.”

“That make sense.” He murmured, remembering the look in his mother’s eyes as she had watched Helion from across the sitting room the night before. “Can she stay here?”

“For as long as she likes.” Lucien recalled the last time his mother had spoken to him about leaving the Autumn Court, how she had told him that Autumn was in her blood and that was where she belonged. “If Eris let her.” Helion added.

“If she wanted to, I believe he would.”

Helion nodded thoughtfully. “If she did stay, might you?”

Lucien found himself just staring at Helion again. He had dearly missed his mother since he had fled the Autumn Court all those years ago, and he hadn’t ever really thought he would have the opportunity to live somewhere he would be able to see her freely ever again. “Here?” He asked, “With you?”

“It would be easier to get to know one another that way.” Helion seemed almost amused again, and something about that eased the tension in Lucien.

“I…” he paused, “I would need to discuss it with Elain.” He eventually said, his voice soft. “It is not my decision to make alone.”

“Of course.”

“I do thank you for the offer…” He also wanted to ask his mother how she might feel about the idea. “Elain has enjoyed … well, all of the Courts as we have visited them…”

“I can believe that.”

“We had discussed returning to the Dawn Court. Thesan told us we could have a place there if we want it.”

Helion looked thoughtful for a moment. “It is a beautiful Court.”

“It is.”

“Perhaps,” the older male ventured, “after you have spent a little time here, you might wish to stay in the Day Court.”

Lucien smiled ad nodded. He would consider it, and he would talk to Elain. He could not deny that he did wish to get to know Helion, and it was true that staying in the Day Court would make that easier. The High Lord repeatedly pointing out that he didn’t have any other children, and that he thought Lucien would make a good High Lord was also not something to be dismissed. Would Helion really consider him an heir?

He had spent so long believing that he was unimportant, nothing special, and a burden to anyone who displayed him any kind of hospitality. He had always tried to compensate for that by making himself useful and trying his best to be valuable. If Helion was genuine in wishing to know him, develop a relationship with him, and Lucien supposed that interest was genuine if he had bothered trying to test his character, then all of that could change. He had begun to change, he told himself, when Elain had entered his life. She was worth so very much, and the Cauldron had deemed him her match. She loved him, and that meant he wasn’t nothing important. 

When Helion’s long fingers tapped Lucien’s book, Lucien blinked his way out of his thoughts. “Ah… I suppose we should get back to this…” he agreed, nodding and Helion leaned back in his chair with a smile.


	117. Chapter One Hundred and Seventeen

**Chapter 117**

Standing by the wall, Lucien let himself take in the throne room. He hadn’t truly paid all that much attention when he’d been here before, at least, not in the way he was now. Every other time he had been to the Day Court he had had a job to do. He did now as well, but he also had other motives this time. After his talk with Helion, Lucien had sent a letter to Rhysand, informing the High Lord of the Night Court about the initial phases of re-establishing the trade routes that Helion and Kallias had begun. He knew that Rhys would want to get involved, and he expected a return letter by the next morning.

Many of Helion’s courtiers were present and milling around the room, speaking with one another and sending furtive glances his way every so often. Lucien had not expected Helion to announce to everyone present that he was the High Lord’s son, yet that was what had happened as soon as they had returned to the throne room. There had been no ceremony about it, just Helion standing up on the dais and saying loudly to everyone present that Lucien was his son, and was to be treated as such. Lucien hadn’t really ever thought of himself as one who got embarrassed easily, but he was sure that he blushed at that and, when all eyes in the room turned his way, he wished that he could flee from their gazes. Nobody had said or done anything, however, and they had all returned to their business, leaving him to stand and watch as he wished. He knew that they were all talking about him now, however. He also knew that the entire Court would know he was Helion’s son by sundown.

Pretending that he didn’t notice the looks that they kept sending his way, Lucien tried to look as unaffected as he could. He let his eyes move around the room again, taking in any familiar faces that he recognised and the opulence of Helion’s chosen décor. His mother, he noticed, was standing with the High Lord by the dais, and Lucien could not help but watch as the two of them spoke quietly with one another. He had never seen his mother look at Beron the way she was currently looking at Helion. Her eyes were creased at the corners as she smiled, and Lucien didn’t think that anyone could look at her and not know exactly how she felt. It was no wonder that Beron had never let her anywhere near Helion in the entire time that Lucien had been alive, he doubted that the High Lord of the Autumn Court could have kept the rumours about his unfaithful wife quiet if she had have been looking at Helion like that where anyone could have seen her. When Helion lifted a hand and, ever so gently, brushed a lock of Ashk’s red hair back from her face, Lucien knew that the affection between them was real and still very much alive. Something within him flared again at the thought, knowing that he had come from that. 

An increase in murmuring throughout the throne room caught Lucien’s attention and he blinked as his eyes scanned the room, looking for the source. He felt Elain, and knew that she was back. His eyes kept scanning the room looking for her, and he found her as she approached his mother and Helion. Moving toward them, Lucien’s gaze caught on his mate, dressed now in Day Court attire. The dress was far more revealing than anything he had previously seen her wear, with a low sweeping neckline, and a hemline that fell to just above her knees. As he watched, Elain’s hands smoothed over the white linen dress and she bit her lip. He could feel her nervousness, and knew that she must have been uncomfortable with how little the dress covered. Lucien narrowed his eyes when Helion’s hand came to rest on Elain’s shoulder and he bent to say something to her. Quickening his step, Lucien hurried toward his mate, knowing that if the other male’s hand was still on her when he got there, he would be unable to control his reaction.

Elain turned his way as he approached, and Lucien saw her face break into a wide smile. He reached her a moment later and bent, lifting her off of the ground as he wrapped his arms around her, sweeping her into a hug. Elain’s arms slid around Lucien’s neck as she squeezed him, and Lucien found himself unable to put her down. Nobody else was going to touch her. Not in that outfit, and not today. 

“Lucien…” he heard her voice in his ear, and could tell that she was smiling. “You can put me down…”

“No…” Lucien tried to force himself to calm down. He shook his head, and Elain’s lips gently brushed his cheek. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Her hands moved over his shoulders, and Lucien drew a deep breath, breathing in her scent. Carefully, he set Elain back on her feet, one of his hands taking hers immediately. He still wasn’t prepared to let her go. She smiled up at him and Lucien lifted his other hand to her cheek, stroking her skin with his thumb. “Do you like the dress?” she asked, and his eyes moved down over her again. He could see the pretty pink blush staining her cheeks now that he was this close, and he followed it down her throat to her chest with his eyes. “It’s… a … bit…” she broke off and Lucien smiled. 

“I like it.”

One of Elain’s hands took hold of the front of Lucien’s shirt. “I’m sure you do…” she murmured, and he watched as her brown eyes flickered past him to the rest of the room. She bit her lip again and he tried to bite back a snarl when Helion approached them. 

“You look stunning.” The High Lord said.

Lucien turned his head toward Helion, struggling to keep himself leashed. He tried reminding himself that the other male was his father, and that he had just seen the way he had been with his mother who still stood nearby, but his heart was thundering in his chest, and he couldn’t make it stop. He put himself between Helion and Elain while the voice inside at him continued to scream at him to get her out of this room. _Mate. Mate. Mate. Mine._

Swallowing, Lucien struggled to resist his urge to launch himself at Helion when those amber eyes shifted to Elain, moving over her appreciatively. “Stop testing me…” he managed to ground out between clenched teeth. 

Amber eyes snapped to his face, and Helion tilted his head. The High Lord frowned, and glanced quickly between Lucien and Elain again. “Oh…” Helion sounded surprised for a moment, and turned to look at Lucien’s mother for a second before returning his gaze to them. “Elain … hasn’t accepted… the bond?”

“Not yet…” Elain’s voice was soft and gentle as it came from behind Lucien. Helion took a step back then, his eyes meeting Lucien’s burning gaze. 

“I see…” Helion took another step back, away from them.

“I think Elain and I might… retreat … for a little while…” Lucien forced the words out and Helion nodded his agreement and understanding. 

“Take your time.”

“Elain…” Lucien turned, still holding Elain’s hand in his. He couldn’t keep the snarl in when his gaze swept the room, meeting the eyes of anyone who dared look at them as he strode for the door to the hallway, taking Elain with him. If anyone had so much stepped their way, he wasn’t sure that he wouldn’t have ripped them apart. His blood was hot and pounding its way through his body, and he was only clinging to his self-restraint by the very tips of his fingernails.


	118. Chapter One Hundred and Eighteen

**Chapter 118**

As the door clicked closed, Lucien tried to make himself calm down. His heart was racing, and he was breathing heavily, and he could stop neither of those things as he turned to Elain, still clutching one of her hands tightly in his. He lifted the other hand, sliding it over her shoulder and pulling her to himself. Drawing a deep breath, Lucien took in Elain’s floral scent hoping that she, and the lavender she washed her hair with, would soothe him. His hand moved down her back, pulling her more tightly to himself as he clutched at her, pressing his face into her hair. When Elain slid her hand from his and wrapped both of her arms around his neck, Lucien dropped both of his own hands to her waist, pressing closer.

“Mine…” the word was snarled, and Lucien heard it before he’d even been aware that it had come from him. 

“Mhmm…” One of Elain’s hands slid up the back of his neck into his hair, and Lucien began stroking the palms of his hands over the light linen material of the Day Court dress she was wearing. At the thought of the way the faeries in the throne room had been looking at Elain, a surge of possessiveness moved through Lucien and his hands began to move more quickly. He wanted to feel more of her, all of her, and he pulled her hips firmly against his own, letting her feel how hard he was. Elain made a surprised sound, and one of her hands grasped at his shoulder. 

Unable to stop, Lucien ran his hands up Elain’s sides, taking the short dress up as he did so. Her hand tightened on his shoulder and he paused. “Mine…” he breathed, fingers moving to drag up her thighs again as his lips moved to her forehead. 

“Yes…” she murmured, gasping when his hands clutched more tightly at her, squeezing. He slid one hand between her thighs, pausing again at the sound she made. He didn’t know what he was doing. Every instinct in him had been screaming at him to get her back here, where he could have her all to himself, and where nobody else would be looking at her or able to touch her. Nobody but him. He had his hands on her now, and he wanted far more. He wasn’t about to just throw her on the floor and do as he liked, however, and the mere thought of that pretty much set his blood alight in his veins. Lucien groaned. Just because he was worked up and feeling possessive didn’t mean that Elain wanted that. 

Lucien lifted his head enough to meet her dark eyes. He was still breathing heavily, and his hands were shaking with the effort it took to keep them still and not moving over every inch of her that he could reach. When Elain slid one of her hands down to rest over his heart, Lucien remembered that she could hear it and figured it must be pounding in her head as much as it was in his own. “Elain…” he breathed, still trying to force himself to breathe more easily.

Elain’s brown eyes moved across his face and she lifted the hand from his chest to his cheek a moment later. Lucien forced his own hands to remain still on her back. This was worse than that first time he’d been struck by this that night she had walked in on him in the kitchen in the dark when he had first returned to Velaris. Just being able to hold her had been enough then. It wasn’t now. 

*

He was trembling. Elain could feel Lucien’s hands shaking, pressed against her back, and she could feel him quivering beneath her own hands. The tension in him was evident as he was so very clearly struggling to keep himself under control. She could hear his rapid, ragged, breathing, see the muscles in his face and throat working as he kept himself in check. 

Need was slamming repeatedly into her down the bond, as well as the constant sense of MINE. She knew that he was desperately trying to stop himself from whatever it was he was being driven to do, and the possessive way he had held her since he had first gotten his hands on her in the throne room told Elain exactly what that was going to be. He was waiting for her decision though. She could feel that in the way he was forcing himself to remain still, and the way his eyes were locked on hers. If she told him ‘no’, she knew that he would listen. It would be extremely difficult, but she knew that he would heed her. Elain trusted that; trusted him. 

Going up on her toes, she pressed her lips gently to Lucien’s, meeting his eyes again when she went back down. She saw the instant that he realised she was giving him permission to stop restraining himself and then his hands were tight on her hips as he backed her across the room, his eyes not leaving hers for an instant. 

When Elain’s back hit the wall, she gasped. Lucien bent, his hands sliding down her thighs, before he lifted her from the floor and helped her wrap her legs around his waist. His hands were possessive once more as they moved back up over her, one moving over her ribs while the other came up to her throat. When his mouth crashed down over hers a instant later, Elain tightened her arms around his neck as he held her pinned to the wall with his own body. The hand from her ribs had slid down and she could feel him fiddling with his own pants as his hot kiss moved across her cheek. 

"Mine…” he breathed in her ear, and Elain could barely hear him over the sound of his thundering heart. “Mate…”

“Yes…”

Lucien’s only response was to shift the short dress she was still wearing out of his way, and then he was inside of her. Elain gave a cry, her hands clutching at his shoulders and back, as Lucien slowed for a moment, his own hands moving firmly over her as if still trying to touch every part of her he possibly could. Flashes of the throne room reached Elain down the bond then, and she saw images of Helion touching her shoulder, and masses of faerie faces looking their way. A snarl ripped out of Lucien at that, and she felt a trickle of anger that followed. His hold on her tightened and then he thrust up into her and she was unable to bite back another cry. He followed that thrust with another and Elain’s fingernails scratched at the jacket he still wore. A feral snarl was still coming from him and Elain whimpered when he thrust again, slipping into a smooth rhythm. 

Closing her eyes, Elain clutched desperately at Lucien’s shoulders, trying to steady herself as he held her in place, still snarling as he fucked her against the wall. His hands continued to move over her, possessive and searching, as if still trying to reassure himself of something, but Elain didn’t know what. Lucien continued in this manner for quite a while, and then his rhythm shifted and Elain groaned. He moved again and she opened her eyes when one of his hands took hold of her face. Russet and gold eyes met hers and she found Lucien’s face mere inches from her own. He held her gaze as he continued to thrust in to her, holding her face still to ensure she wouldn’t look away, and Elain’s breath began to catch in her throat. There was fire in his russet eye, and a soft grunt behind every one of his movements. 

_Mine. Mine. Mine_. The word continued to reach Elain down the bond over and over, matching itself to Lucien’s movements inside of her, and she found herself chanting the word in her own mind. 

“Lucien…” she whimpered his name and his lips met hers in response. She just clung to him, her fingernails still scratching at his coat as she gasped into his kiss, her breath escaping her. Her own edge was close, and she could feel that Lucien’s was as well. His hand remained on her face, holding her where he could maintain his view of her face, his eyes remaining on hers as he continued to push her toward that edge, still firmly against the wall.


	119. Chapter One Hundred and Nineteen

**Chapter 119**

Elain was barely aware of the fact that Lucien had lifted her into his arms. She didn’t notice him cross the room, and was surprised when he lowered her gently to the bed. “Lucien…” she murmured, lifting a hand of her own to his shirt and taking a handful of it tightly. 

“Yes, Petal…” Lucien moved up beside her, wrapping an arm around her waist as he lay down beside her and drawing her closer. Elain leaned into him, still feeling as if electricity was coursing through her. She let out a slow breath as Lucien’s hands moved carefully over her. Smiling when he pressed his lips to her forehead, Elain stroked his shirt, enjoying the feel of the fine fabric beneath her fingers. “I’m sorry…” he murmured, and Elain looked up to meet his eyes. “If that was… too much.”

“No…” She breathed, bringing her hand up to his cheek. “You could never be too much.” Relief trickled down the bond to her, and she smiled at him. 

“If you’re sure…”

“Thank you.” Elain held his gaze, watching as he raised a surprised eyebrow at her. 

“For what?”

“For checking with me.” She breathed, “Before…” she stroked her fingers down his cheek, “I know that it was hard. I know that you would have stopped if I had told you I didn’t want it.” Lucien nodded and she smiled again. “I love you.”

“Love you, Petal.” His arm tightened around her waist and he pressed another kiss to her forehead. “I’m so thankful for you.” His hands moved up and down her back, “I love that you recognise when that happens…. That you understand it…”

“Well, I can feel you…” she murmured, her fingers moving along his jaw, “I could feel what you wanted… and I could feel your struggle…” Her eyes focused on his beautiful, full lips and she shifted closer, biting her own lip for a moment, “I could feel that you would listen to me. I trust you.” She leaned in to kiss him, groaning in appreciation when he returned her kiss with interest. 

“I didn’t mean for it to be like that.” He murmured, kissing her again. “I never intended to be so…”

“I know.” She smiled into his next kiss, “I still liked it.”

“I had thought…” he told her, “that every time would be… softer…” she could feel his rising anxiety, and she pulled him closer, grinning when he lifted both of his hands to her face as he kissed her again. “Guess I’ll just have to make it up…” his kisses turned gentle and Elain felt herself melting when his hands moved down her body. The possessiveness was gone and Elain gave a soft sigh when Lucien’s hands, almost reverently, slid her dress from her shoulders. His fingers caressed her skin as he traced them to her bare hips as he moved over her, settling his weight atop her.

“Oh…” Elain slid her hands up his chest, pushing his jacket back off his shoulders, “Again already?”

“Let me show you how it should have been…” his words sent a shiver through Elain and he grinned at her a moment later, moving to strip his shirt off. When he’d slipped his pants off an instant later a shiver of anticipation moved through Elain and she combed her fingers through Lucien’s vibrant red hair. His eyes lifted to meet her gaze then and she tugged him down to kiss him. 

Elain had not been expecting Lucien’s fingers to slip between her thighs, and she gave a surprised gasp as he began caressing her. “Ohh… that… that is… oh…oh…”

“Nice, is it?”

“Ah... ah... mhm…” her eyes slid closed and she bit her lower lip as Lucien continued to move his fingers in a way that made Elain want to scream. Her hands squeezed at his shoulders as she whimpered, gasping when he pulled his fingers from her. “Lucien…”

“It’s okay…” he breathed, pressing a kiss to her cheek and then moving up her jaw. “I’m going to give you exactly what you want…”

Elain felt a twisted smirk spread across her face and she slid her hands slowly down Lucien’s sides to his hips. “I believe that you will…” She murmured before he bent his head to kiss her again. Lucien’s weight on her increased and she felt him reach down to adjust himself. Parting her lips for him, Elain groaned when she felt him slip his tongue slowly into her mouth, licking carefully at her and sending tingles through her entire body.

He felt different this time, Elain noticed. As bits and pieces reached her down the bond, she tried to sort through everything that she was sensing from Lucien. There was caution regarding what he had done earlier, and desire to give her more than that. He was entirely focused now on her and on making her feel good. The hurried desperation from earlier was gone, and in its place was patience and tenderness, and fire seemed to follow wherever Lucien’s hands moved over her body. 

Elain met Lucien’s gaze when he lifted his head slightly, and she could see the fire was in his russet eye as well. One of his hands tightened on her hip while the other came to gently cup her cheek, and Elain’s breath caught in her throat at the feel of him pressing his hard length against her. When he still hadn’t pushed into her after several moments, Elain let out a soft whine, earning another smile from Lucien, this one mischievous. “There’s no hurry…” he told her gently, his thumb tracing her lips as he continued to smile at her, “I do intend to take my time…” 

“Lucien…” She hooked one of her feet around behind his knee, and he took the hint. “Aah-ah…” Her eyes slid closed when he pressed forward, pushing himself slowly inside of her.

Lucien’s lips returned to hers, as the hand at her waist carefully caressed her. He was still as he kissed her, licking carefully and making her want more before he moved, ever so slowly, and Elain’s back arched as she felt him push deeper, inch by hot inch. Gasping, her hand tightened on his shoulder, and Lucien rolled his hips. “You… really have something to prove…?” She managed to get the words out, despite being seemingly unable to quite catch her breath. 

Lucien gave a soft laugh in reply, rolling his hips again, before pressing a soft kiss to the tip of her nose. “Just want to give you what you deserve…”

She had never known him to be this slow and deliberate, and kept her eyes on his face as he moved carefully over her. She enjoyed the look in his eyes, and on his face, watching his intent expression, and she could feel him focusing on every move he made. “I think I deserve you.” She breathed, and his pleasure at those words washed over her down the bond. 

Lucien had settled into a deliberate and slow rhythm, and Elain kept one of her hands in his hair while the other moved over his back. He had wanted to claim her earlier, to know that she was his, and she wanted to do the same. If Helion had told the Court that Lucien was his son, then people would now see him as an heir to the day court, and rather more important than he had been before. Elain did not think it was beyond expectation that some of the other females might like the idea of Lucien in a way they had previously overlooked. When he pressed his face into her neck, She took the chance to sink her teeth into his shoulder. He gave a surprised grunt and lifted his head. Elain looked at the mark she had made, red and angry looking, and she knew that it would bruise. 

“Mine.” She told him, and he grinned at her.


	120. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty

**Chapter 120**

Steam still fogged the mirror as Lucien watched Elain. Swirling a hand through the bathwater, his eyes followed her across the bathroom, his metallic eye clicking as he focused on her hands as she adjusted the fluffy towel she had wrapped around her. He watched her move across to the bench by the window and pick up a comb before pulling it through her gorgeous hair. Staying silent, Lucien just watched as she pulled her hair up into a loose braid around the top of her head like a crown and he smiled when she then turned to look at him. 

“Are you going to stay in there all night?”

“The view is pretty good from here.” He replied, giving her a wink. He was pleased when he saw her blush, her eyes shifting away as she smiled.

“Oh, really?”

“Absolutely.”

“Well, if that’s what you think…” Elain’s brown eyes met his again for a moment before she loosened the towel around her. Lucien sat a little higher in the tub, watching as she removed the towel and draped it casually over a nearby hook on the wall. He grinned, his eyes following her as she walked across to where she had hung her Day Court dress. Elain was moving slowly, each of her actions deliberate and aware of his eyes on her. As she lifted the dress and slipped it over her head, Lucien found himself unable to swallow as he watched her shift her hips as she pulled it down over herself, the thin material settling easily against her skin. He remembered the feeling of pulling that dress off of her and he got to his feet, reaching for his own towel and wrapping it around his waist as he stepped out of the bathtub.

Elain turned to him and he saw her satisfied smirk. She had evidently been trying to lure him out, and he didn’t mind. “Come here, Petal…”

“Mmm…” She held a hand out to him, placing it against his chest as she looked up at him. “You need to get dressed, or we will be late for dinner.”

Lucien did not care. He looked her over, eyes moving over the short white linen dress, and at the way it clung to her in all the right places before falling softly in elegant waves. “Will we?” he murmured, a hand reaching out to glide down one of her arms. 

“Yes.” Elain replied, looking up at him with another smirk. “I’m hungry.”

“We did miss Lunch.” He admitted, thinking about their day so far. They had gone for a walk in the morning and then come back to the palace where he’d gone off with Helion while Elain had been fitted with Day Court clothing. He’d brought her back here as soon as he’d seen her again. They hadn’t had a chance to sit down for lunch, and it was nearly sunset now. “I’m sorry…”

Elain shook her head, one of her fingers tracing his collarbone. “I think I liked what we did better…”

“More satisfying than whatever fruit salad they served would have been?” he asked, grinning, his eyes on her face, waiting for her reaction. She blushed again and looked away, and Lucien grinned more widely. She looked back up at him again when he brushed his fingers across her cheek before placing them beneath her chin as he lifted her face toward his. That pretty blush was still staining her cheeks as he bent and pressed a kiss to her lips before lifting his head again to smile at her. “Alright… let’s get some dinner.”

*

Elain had been right. As she looked around the dining hall, she noticed more than a few female faerie faces looking their way entirely too often. It was beginning to get under her skin, and she glanced at Lucien when he took one of her hands in his beneath the table. He was remarkably handsome, he always had been, and he looked especially striking with the golden light from the sunset spilling through the large windows, lighting up his skin and hair. Word that he was Helion’s son had evidently spread, and this had clearly increased interest in him throughout the Court. When Elain glanced around the room again, she met the gaze of a priestess sitting nearby. Huge amber eyes met her own and Elain resisted a possessive snarl when those eyes flicked again to Lucien, hunger evident in the other female’s features.

“Petal…”

Elain turned her head to look at Lucien again. “Yes?”

“Relax.” His fingers moved up her arm from her wrist to her elbow, still beneath the table. “They’re just curious.” He said, “They found out today that their High Lord has a son. That’s interesting news.”

“They’re not just curious.” She growled, surprised at her own tone. “I can see more than that…”

He released her arm beneath the table, and brought his hand instead up to her face. Tilting her chin slightly, he leaned over to press a kiss to her lips, and Elain noticed the hushed murmur that moved around the room. Lucien was grinning at her when he lifted his head and she met his eyes. “Even if they’re more than curious, it wont come to anything.” He pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose then. “Anyone could see that I belong to you.” Elain’s gaze dropped to the bitemark she could see just peeking out from the collar of his shirt, and satisfaction flowed through her. 

“Yes…” she murmured, “Good…”

“I kind of like it when you’re jealous…” he told her and she narrowed her eyes at him. 

“I don’t.” she replied, “I don’t know what I would do to anyone who tried to…” she broke off at the thought. It surprised her that she could truly see herself going a little savage and attacking anyone who got too close to her Lucien.

“It’s the bond.” He told her, grinning as he looked her over, that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he did so. “I’ve felt like that since it snapped into place.”

“How exhausting.”

He laughed then, and took her hand beneath the table once again. “It is. But, I love it.”

Elain tightened her hand on his as her eyes slid around the room again. Some of the faeries were looking at her with jealousy now, evidently having witnessed Lucien kissing her, and she tried to keep her face unaffected and neutral as she returned her attention to the food on her plate. If anyone dared have the thought that they stood a chance in getting anywhere near him, they had another thing coming.

*

Lucien looked at Helion’s wide smile as his father looked him over. “You like it.” Lucien said, able to tell all too easily that the other male was pleased. 

“Very much. It does suit you.”

“Uh…” Lucien glanced down at himself. He was clad in the traditional Day Court attire, Helion having insisted he get fitted out by the same tailor Elain had seen earlier in the day. “You think so?”

“Indeed.”

“I…” He plucked at the short skirt-type garment that finished entirely too high above his knees for his liking. “I am used to… pants.” He finished lamely. 

“Yes…”

“This…” Lucien didn’t know what he wanted to say.

“Shows off your physique.” Helion said helpfully. 

Lucien glanced at the full length mirror nearby. The garment swept over one of his shoulders and across his chest before being cinched at the waist by a golden braided belt. His hand came up to brush at the bite mark Elain had made on his exposed shoulder, and he bit his tongue. The mark was completely visible, and he supposed that would please her considering her reaction to the attention he had been receiving at dinner. “I… it…” he fell silent, and turned to look at his father once again. Helion was still smiling. 

“Give it a chance.”

“Alright…”

“Let us go and ask your mate what she thinks, shall we?”

Lucien paused. Elain was in one of Helion’s private sitting rooms, with Eris and his mother, and a handful of Helion’s other favoured courtiers. He hadn’t counted on having to appear dressed as he was in front of others, at least not right away. When he realised that Helion was watching him and waiting for his response, he nodded, resigning himself to the fact that it was going to happen. Fixing a courtly smile onto his face, Lucien motioned for Helion to lead the way. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it with as much bravado and sass as he could manage.


	121. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-One

**Chapter 121**

Making sure to keep his smile firmly in place, Lucien strode into the sitting room with his shoulders back and his head held high. He heard Eris’ choked sound before his brother had managed to cut it off, and he saw the High Lord of the Autumn Court turn away with a hand over his mouth to face the fireplace. Lucien ignored him, keeping his smile firmly in place as his eyes slid to his mother who slowly got to her feet, a bright smile spreading across her face.

“Oh…” She moved closer, her eyes shifting from Lucien to Helion who had entered the room just behind him. “I never thought I’d see…” her russet eyes met Lucien’s again and she smiled even more widely. Lucien stopped when she reached him, and his smile turned genuine when she lifted a hand to his cheek, her eyes still moving over him. “You look wonderful.”

“Thank you.”

His mother’s hand slid from his cheek, and he watched as she looked back to Helion, her eyes alight. Lucien let his own gaze move around the rest of the room, keenly aware that all eyes were on him. A priestess nearby was smiling at him and, as she took a step his way, Lucien spotted Elain. Walking past the priestess, Lucien strode across the room as Elain closed her little book, setting it on the table at which she was sitting, as she pushed her chair back and got to her feet. He watched her dark eyes move over him as her mouth opened in shock and then she grinned at him, her eyes lifting back up to meet his own. 

“Lucien…” She sounded thoroughly pleased, and he could hear the utter joy in her voice. “You look… _so good_.”

“Oh?” he raised an eyebrow as he reached her. He hadn’t been sure what her reaction would be, but he had to admit he didn’t mind this one. She looked him over again, reaching a hand out to touch him carefully. 

“Yes…” She tilted her head, taking him in. “I like it…”

“I’m glad.” Lucien tucked a piece of her hair that had fallen out of her braid back in, smiling again when he felt the rush of desire and appreciation coming from her. She truly did like what she saw, he knew. “If you like it that much, I might have to keep it.”

“Oh, do.” She grinned up at him, and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her in until he had her pressed against himself. He shuddered at the feel of her lips against the bitemark on his shoulder, and he felt her laugh in response.

“What do you think, Elain?” Helion’s voice asked from behind him, and Lucien released Elain so that they could both turn to look at the High Lord. “Do you think it’s appropriate for Lucien?”

“Very much.” She replied, her hand sliding into his again. “He looks…” she paused and when he slanted a glance at her, he found her eyes moving over him again. “… powerful.” She finished and he raised an eyebrow at her. 

Helion was nodding his agreement, and Lucien noticed everyone else present now looking him over again. Elain squeezed his hand, and he was grateful. It hadn’t completely occurred to him that being announced as Helion’s son would put him straight back into the political game he had escaped so long ago when he’d fled the Autumn Court. Sure, he had been a part of it as Tamlin’s Emissary and, he supposed, Rhys’ as well, but being someone who played that game on behalf of others was completely different to being a part of it because of who you were. Now that he was the son of the High Lord of the Day Court, there was no escaping the games he would have to play, and no escaping the games others would play with him. He could just about see the calculating looks in the eyes of several of the courtiers, and he knew that he was being assessed. How he presented himself now would determine the way that he would be approached and treated from here on out.

Lucien had worn so many different kinds of masks in his lifetime, and he knew that this would be no different. He arranged his face into his familiar courtly smile and he lifted Elain’s hand to himself, brushing his lips across her knuckles. “If my Lady likes it, it must be good…” he said brightly. He would establish himself as having no qualms about this, and he would establish himself as taking Elain’s opinion into consideration. He had seen the looks that he had been given at dinner, even as he’d attempted to calm Elain down and dismiss it as mere curiosity. He knew that anyone who thought they might use him to get any kind of power would come for him, and he hoped that seeing him with Elain, a happy and united couple, might dissuade as much of that as possible. 

As Ashk sat in an armchair, Helion sank into the one beside her. Lucien slid his hand up Elain’s arm, drawing her with him as he lowered himself into the chair she had vacated before. He grinned at her, making space for her in his lap, and his grin widened when she adjusted herself on him, leaning back against his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Elain adjusted herself again, tugging the short Day Court dress down over her thighs, and Lucien let one of his hands slip down to trace his fingertips over her skin. 

She cast a glance at him and he smiled, before shifting his eyes to his mother who leaned forward to speak to them. “Have you completed your collection of flowers for the Day Court, Elain?”

“I have not.” Elain replied, her hands still smoothing her dress down. 

“When you have time,” his mother went on, “I have one I think you will like. I would like to show you.”

“I would like that.” Elain reached forward and picked her book up from the table sitting between them. Lucien let her stretch a little further, loosening his arm around her waist, as she reached for her pencil. “I only have three or four so far.” She leaned back against him then, her back against his chest, and he let his hand slide up her thigh once more. She turned her head to look at him again, and Lucien grinned, thankful for the table at which they were sitting, and that his mother couldn’t see what he had done. “Lucien…” Elain’s voice was barely a whisper, and he read her lips more than heard her. He smiled at her, pressing his lips to hers as he stroked her thigh again. She narrowed her eyes at him.

Settling his hand firmly against her thigh, no longer stroking her, Lucien gave her an innocent smile. Elain settled against him again, and they both turned their attention on the conversation Eris was now having with Helion. Lucien noted that it was about Helion’s proposed trade route down to the Winter Court. Eris was suggesting that it might continue even further down into the Autumn Court, and Helion was nodding his agreement. Making a mental note to send that information to Rhys before he went to bed, Lucien tightened his arm around Elain’s waist.

“They’re all still looking at you.” Elain had turned her head once more to whisper to him, and Lucien met her eyes.

“I know.” He murmured, “I think they probably will for a little while.”

She pouted a little, and Lucien slid his hand up her thigh a little more, his fingers slipping beneath the hem of the dress. Elain sat straight, looking at him again, her eyes wide. Lucien watched as a dark blush spread across her cheeks and down her throat as she stared at him, and he felt one of her own hands come down on his, stopping him. 

“Lucien…”

He froze, trying to read the expression on her face. It wasn’t just shyness he saw there; she looked kind of scandalised. “I am sorry, Petal.” He replied, feeling stupid. He shouldn’t have done that, he knew that Elain would never have been okay with doing something like that in a room full of people. “I didn’t think.”

“Hmm.” The corner of her lips quirked slightly in a smile and she pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before getting to her feet. “I’ll be back soon.” Lucien watched as she moved around the table to his mother and bent to say something quietly to her. His mother got to her own feet a moment later and Lucien could do nothing but watch silently as they both strode from the room.


	122. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Two

**Chapter 122**

“I am sure you will let the High Lord of the Night Court know…” Eris’ amber eyes were on Lucien.

“Of course.” Lucien made a mental note to add to the letter he would send Rhys before he went to bed. He leaned back in his chair as Eris and Helion did the same thing. 

“It’s a lot to think about…” Eris sat forward again and got to his feet, moving toward the fire again and running a hand through his red hair. Lucien watched him. He had wondered how Eris would handle being the High Lord of the Autumn Court. It wasn’t as if his brother didn’t know how things worked, he had been running things in Beron’s stead for decades, but now the responsibility of the decisions he was making would fall to him, and that was a different type of stress altogether. Watching his brother’s face, Lucien decided that Eris didn’t look stressed; he looked thoughtful. Eris would, Lucien figured, make a good High Lord.

When Helion got to his feet and moved past Lucien, the older male lay a gentle hand on Lucien’s shoulder as he passed, and Lucien couldn’t help but smile softly, turning his head to watch as Helion headed to a small group of faeries by the far wall. He had only just turned back around when the priestess who had been looking at him earlier sank down in the seat beside him. 

“Lucien.”

“Hello…” He thought quickly, trying to find a name to go with the face. She seemed familiar, but he didn’t think that he had ever actually met her before. 

“Sorcha.” She supplied, a hand sweeping her golden hair back over her shoulder, and Lucien nodded.

“Forgive me,” he said, “I don’t think we’ve met.”

“We have not.” She confirmed, “Well… I suppose now we have.”

“True.” He glanced around the room, “… are you from the Day Court?”

“Yes.” She smiled brightly. “I grew up here, in the Court. I did my training away, but I came back not that long ago. It’s so nice to be home again.”

Lucien smiled at her. It must certainly be nice to feel as if you had a welcoming home. “I can imagine.”

“Kind of like you.” She said, “Coming home and having the High Lord tell everyone that you are his son.” Her sky blue eyes looked him over, “When everyone thought you were Beron’s son…”

Twisting his hands together in his lap, Lucien gave a slow nod. “A lot has changed.”

“It was so very interesting to hear that you publicly supported Eris becoming the new High Lord of Autumn.”

“He was the logical choice.”

“I am sure you would have had support if you had wanted it.” She said, “It was interesting that you would just hand it over… but now that you are here and we know that you are Helion’s son, it makes sense…”

Lucien watched her, wondering what she was getting at. He wasn’t particularly fond of the apparent fixation she had on his claim to power. A High Lord like Helion without heirs suddenly announcing he had a son, however, was extremely big news so he knew that it would be a major topic of conversation across Prythian for a time to come. He figured he would be having many of these conversations with faeries he didn’t know in the coming weeks.

“You do look like him…” Sorcha’s hand was suddenly on his arm, and Lucien stared down at her hand, trying to work out a courtly diplomatic way to get her to remove it without jerking his arm away. “Are you like him in other ways?”

“I… what ways do you mean?” He glanced at her face to see her blue eyes flick over him again, and he wished that he was wearing his usual attire. “Well, I can see…” she lifted a slender hand and leaned forward to brush her long fingers against his shoulder, and the bitemark Elain had left on his skin, “You do like to play…”

Lucien sat back in his seat. “With my mate.” He said stiffly. 

*

Leaning her back against the warm stone, Elain rested her little book against her raised knees as she sketched. Ashk stood nearby, taking softly about the little golden flowers she had lead Elain to, and Elain listened as she worked. She was struggling to get the shape of the petals correct but, listening to the Lady of the Autumn Court speak, she didn’t mind so much. Trying again, Elain was more pleased with her second attempt, and she smiled as she moved on to the leaves. 

“Helion brought me a bunch of these…” 

“Oh?” Elain glanced up at Ashk, waiting for her to go on. 

“After he had saved me from Hybern… I was… I had just lost my family… my sisters…” Her face darkened for a moment, “It was a horrible time… and when he came to see how I was… he brought some of these to lift my spirits I suppose…”

“And did they?”

“Yes… although, not quite so much as he did.”

Her pencil stilling on her paper, Elain glanced up again. She didn’t think she had heard Ashk speak so openly about anyone, except perhaps Lucien. “Were you in love with him then?”

“I suppose I was.”

“Were you in love with him when you had Lucien?”

“Yes…” Ashk’s voice had quietened and she smiled gently at Elain. “I believe that is why he is the kindest of my sons… He comes from love. There was no way he could be anything but what he is.”

Elain smiled at that. “I like that.” She replied, then paused for a moment. “Are… you… still in love with Helion?”

Ashk’s expression turned reflective and she tilted her head, her red hair cascading over her shoulder, as she lifted both hands to her own face, her eyes distant. “I do not know.” She replied eventually. “It has been so long since I allowed myself to consider… since Beron found out and I couldn’t see him… Lucien’s entire life.”

“But you’re here now.”

“Yes…” Ashk smiled at her. “It is nice to see him again… to see him want to talk to Lucien… to see him pleased that he has a son…”

“To see him pleased to see you…” Elain added, smiling again at Ashk who blushed just a little.

“Yes.” Russet eyes moved over Elain and down to her book. “Have you finished your illustration?”

“I think so. I’ll do the colour tomorrow. Do you think we should return to the sitting room?”

“If you like.” Ashk stepped back as Elain got to her feet. “I think Lucien needed a few moments to establish himself among the Court and Helion’s closest courtiers. They will see him as the heir now, and he needs to show them who he is.” Elain glanced at her as they began walking up the hallway together. Remembering that the Lady of the Autumn Court had been playing these Court games for centuries, she nodded, making note of what she was being told. “It was a good move to allow Helion to give him the clothing of the Day Court… a visual cue, a reminder, of who he is… and that he can belong here.”

“Do you think he’s in danger?” Elain asked softly, “From anyone who wants that position for themselves…” Elain nearly added comment about what Lucien’s brothers had done, but stopped herself, remembering that the Lady was probably still suffering from the loss of her other sons.

“This is not the Autumn Court.” Ashk said softly. “They play a different kind of game here.”

Part of Elain relaxed, but another part tightened in apprehension. She wasn’t used to these kinds of games, and she was afraid she wouldn’t know what to do to help Lucien. Ashk just smiled and linked their arms together as they approached the sitting room. “Have you thought about accepting the bond any more since we last spoke?”

“I have.” Elain murmured. “I want to do it, and I don’t want to wait until we return to the Night Court.” She paused for a moment, “That would mean doing it here… but… do you think that would be rude?”

“Not at all.”

“It seems like an imposition. I mean, I have heard of incidents where people have been interrupted and there have been fights and deaths… and… Do you think Helion would appreciate having that happen in his palace…?”

“I don’t think Helion would mind you doing it here.” Ashk said softly, “Precautions can be taken so that everything goes smoothly…”

Elain nodded, chewing on her lower lip as she considered.

“It will all be lovely, don’t worry Elain.”


	123. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Three

**Chapter 123**

Her blood heating as she walked into the sitting room with Ashk, Elain stared hard at the back of the blonde head belonging to the slight faerie speaking to Lucien. The priestess was leaning forward, her elbows on her knees, as she said something followed by a laugh that made the hairs on the back of Elain’s neck stand up. Lucien was sitting straight in his chair, and Elain was pleased to see he was not leaning forward to hear whatever was being said to him. His eyes were on the priestess as he nodded in agreement with whatever she had said, and Elain released Ashk’s arm, heading straight for the pair by the table.

Russet and gold eyes flicked up to meet Elain’s own eyes as she approached the table, and Lucien’s face relaxed a little, a smile appearing to brighten his features. Elain lifted a hand to trace across his shoulder as she moved around behind him, trailing her fingers down across his chest. She allowed those fingers to dip down just beneath the white linen of the Day Court attire he wore, her hand settling against his chest as she wrapped her other arm around him, pressing against him from behind. Her gaze settled on the face of the priestess now looking up at her and Elain smiled pleasantly, completely aware that her actions had quite clearly just staked her territory, claiming Lucien as hers, and she smiled more widely when she saw that the priestess had been aware of that also.

“Petal…” Lucien said softly, turning his head to press a kiss to the inside of her elbow, the closest part of her that he could reach, “This is Sorcha.”

“Hello.” Elain’s voice remained pleasant, but she held the priestess’ gaze without so much as blinking. After a moment it was Sorcha who looked away, her blue gaze sliding down to where Elain’s hand disappeared beneath that linen across Lucien’s chest. 

“How lovely to meet you.” Sorcha’s voice was sweet and bright. “I have heard tell that you are a Seer…?”

“Of sorts.” Elain replied, her head tilting when Sorcha smiled even more widely. This smile looked a little less friendly though, and Elain was reminded of the vulpine smiles that she had received from Lucien’s brothers when she had visited the Autumn Court. She felt a flicker of concern from Lucien down the bond and then he had lifted one of his own hands, his strong fingers encircling the wrist of her hand not currently pressed to his chest. He lifted that hand to press a kiss to the inside of her wrist, and Elain relaxed just a little. 

“We are,” Lucien said conversationally, “hoping to spend some time in the Day Court libraries, learning more about Elain’s abilities.”

“Yes, I should think that would be a good idea.” Sorcha said, her eyes turning on Lucien as her smile brightened again. “Knowledge is power.”

“So they say.”

“You know,” Sorcha went on, her eyes lifting to meet Elain’s once again, “there are several accounts of the personal histories of some well known Seers which you may find interesting also.”

“Oh, thank you. I will look for them.” Elain replied. Sorcha nodded, and sat up a little straighter, brushing her perfect golden hair back over her shoulders and then smoothing her robes down over herself. 

Lucien’s grip on Elain’s wrist tightened just a little and he turned to look up and around at her. “Are you ready for bed, my love?”

“I am a little tired…” she smiled down at him, her smile growing when he pressed another kiss to the inside of her wrist. 

“Shall we retire then?”

“Yes, I think so…” She slid her hand back up Lucien’s chest to his shoulder, allowing it to drop to her side when he stood up, turning to face her. She couldn’t help her eyes moving over him then. He did look marvellous in the Day Court clothes, and she knew that her thoughts were evident on her face when his fingers came up to brush her cheek softly. 

“I don’t suppose anyone would mind if we just disappear…” he said and she nodded, taking his hand in hers and moving for the door. Elain did not look back at Sorcha, but she could feel the priestess’ blue eyes following them until the door closed behind them, closing them off from everyone still in the sitting room.

She was unable to shake the other faerie from her mind all the way back to the room she shared with Lucien, but once they were alone behind their locked door, everything else melted away. She headed into the bathroom, wanting to freshen up a little and she pulled her braid free to let her hair fall loose down her back and around her shoulders. By the time she had come back into the bedroom she found Lucien standing in front of the full length mirror, his head cocked to one side as his eyes moved over himself. “What are you doing?” she asked, grinning as she watched him.

“Do you really like this?” he asked, turning to face her, and Elain’s grin widened even further as she looked him over. Moving a little closer, Elain reached a hand up to touch him, tracing her fingers over the linen across his chest as she leaned into him her, eyes holding his gaze as she smiled. 

“I very much do.” She told him, her voice low. He raised his eyebrows, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he gazed down at her. 

“Do tell me why, Petal.” He purred and Elain felt shivers move down her back as she leaned even closer. 

“I’m sure you can figure it out…” She slid her hand up the bare skin of his chest and to his shoulder, her fingers moving gently across the bitemark she could still see there. “I also like that this is clear for everyone to see…”

“Everything is.” He murmured, and she smiled even more widely. 

“Well… knowing that this is all mine…” she slid her other hand around his back, as she tilted her head, letting her hair fall over her shoulder as she continued to look up at him. He laughed softly. 

“Doesn’t it look at little ridiculous, though?” he asked. 

Elain stepped back from him, letting him see her eyes move slowly over him, and warmth flushed through her when her eyes reached his face and she took in the expression there. “It does not look ridiculous.” She breathed, both hands lifting to his arms and turning him to push him back to sit on the edge of the bed. “Do you think Helion looks ridiculous?”

“No…” he murmured, and she felt his warm hands against her legs as she stood over him. “But he’s…”

“He’s what?” Elain asked, one of her own hands shifting beneath Lucien’s chin and lifting his face so that she could see it. “What is he that you are not?”

“High Lord?” he asked, grinning, but Elain shook her head. 

“Other than that… do you think that you are somehow less physically appealing?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper, “Because you are not…” She shifted forward, climbing onto his lap as she all but straddled him. Biting her lower lip gently between her teeth at the pleasant feeling of Lucien’s impressive thighs beneath her own, she met his eyes as she settled over him. “You are magnificent.” She told him, “And you look like you belong here… in that outfit… your skin… the whole thing…” she traced her fingertips lightly across his shoulder and down his arm. “It only highlights how you fit here…” Elain pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. “You are golden and resplendent like the sun… like Helion…”

“You look like you belong here, too.” Lucien’s voice was thick, and Elain could hear the emotion behind it. “Maybe we both do…”

“We could…” She shivered when his hands moved up her back and he bent to softly kiss the side of her throat. Elain gave a soft sigh and tilted her head, allowing him easier access to what he was doing as one of her own hands slid up the back of his neck into his own vibrant hair. When she felt Lucien’s teeth scrape against her skin, she let out a soft groan as her other hand gripped his shoulder, and she knew that she was wet. “Lucien…”

“Yes, Petal?” she could tell that he was trying to sound innocent, but that he knew exactly what he had done, because one of his hands was suddenly between her legs and he gave a small laugh against her ear when she jumped slightly at the feel of his fingers. “What is it that you want?” this too, was murmured against her ear and Elain didn’t even try to bite back a groan. 

“My mate.” She breathed, reaching down between them to lift her own short dress out of her way. This was far easier than their usual attire, and Elain added something else she liked about the Day Court clothing when her hand was easily able to find Lucien beneath the linen. Grinning at the soft sound he made deep in his throat as she began to gently stroke him, Elain glanced up at his face from beneath her lashes, her heart thundering in her chest at the look on his face as his eyes slid closed and he bit his lip. She hadn’t even noticed that she had adjusted herself, lifting herself onto him, and it was Lucien’s choked moan as Elain sank down over him, taking him deep inside of her, that brought to her attention what she had done. At the feel of Lucien, hot and hard inside of her, Elain held herself on her knees for just a moment, her hand still tightly gripping one of his shoulders as she took one slow breath after another. 

When she allowed herself to move, Elain sank further onto him, taking herself down onto his firm thighs, and enjoying the way both of Lucien’s strong hands moved to grip her tightly by her hips. His breath was shaky and Elain clung to his shoulders as she carefully shifted herself, rising slightly and tilting her hips. She liked the way Lucien’s breath seemed to catch and he used his grip on her to pull her back down with a groan. She grinned, her eyes moving across his face as she tried to read his expression. “Oh… you like that?” she murmured, her own breath abandoning her. Lucien nodded, his hands beginning to guide her movement with her hips, smooth and even, and Elain did her best to maintain the steady rhythm.

After several minutes, she found herself gasping, seemingly unable to catch her breath and she took one of Lucien’s hands from her hip, bringing it up to her ribs, guiding him to her breast. His hand caressed her, and Elain began moving her hips in a more circular pattern, her eyes on Lucien’s face as she did so. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me…” he groaned, and Elain slid a hand from his shoulder around the back of his neck, her eyes still on her face as she continued her movement, grunting with her effort and at the feel of him hot and hard inside of her.

“I… think that… you… should… wear… that… more often…” she told him, breaking off with a gasp, and closing her eyes to try and maintain her focus on what she was doing. A small sound from Lucien let her know that he had wanted to answer her, but was struggling to do so. She felt his agreement down the bond however, and knew that she would be seeing him in his Day Court attire again. Especially if this was the reward he would receive.


	124. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Four

**Chapter 124**

The morning passed quickly, and Elain was more than a little pleased that Sorcha didn’t appear to be anywhere nearby during breakfast. As they were finishing up, Helion had approached them and, aside from being evidently pleased that both she and Lucien were again in Day Court attire, he had informed them that he had arranged things so that they may borrow anything they liked from any of the libraries in the city. The thought had both pleased and excited Elain. She did want to find out more about her abilities as a seer, but she was also interested to see if there were any books like the one that she was compiling on the flowers of the various Courts of Prythian. She had thought that Lucien might have other things to do acting as the emissary for the Night Court, but he had told her that he would help her look for what she needed first, and she found this promise to be reassuring as she much preferred the idea of him being with her in a library and not wandering around Helion’s palace and bumping into that blonde priestess again.

Elain supposed that she was being paranoid and maybe a little unfair in her reactions to Sorcha, as she hadn’t actually seen the priestess do anything wrong and, in fact, the blonde faerie had even told her of the personal accounts of well known seers that Elain might look for in her research. Even so, she couldn’t shake the feeling that the other female had ulterior motives. It might have been what she had seen of Ianthe in her visions combined with what Lucien and Feyre had told her about the other priestess, but Elain just couldn’t dispel her distrust of Sorcha, whether it was well founded or not.

About an hour after they had finished breakfast, Elain and Lucien were back at the library they had visited previously. This time, they walked with purpose to the section they needed and collected several of the books that Elain had written down to have a closer look at. 

“What do you have?” Lucien asked her, sinking into a chair by a large window, where the bright golden morning light was spilling in to illuminate the room. 

“It looks like an overview of the lives of several seers from the Dawn Court. Several centuries old.” Elain murmured, moving to sit on the thick carpet by Lucien’s chair. She placed the heavy book in her lap and flipped the cover open. After several minutes she had decided that while much of the description of the seers’ lives was generalised and vague, it did give a broad image of the direction in which their lives had turned when they had begun to use their abilities more frequently. None of them had enjoyed very pleasant lives as it appeared their abilities had had an impact upon their minds over time. 

Elain put the book aside and pulled the next into her lap. This one appeared to be an account of several interviews that the author had conducted over a handful of decades, going back to speak to the same seers over and over. Elain’s stomach twisted uncomfortably when she encountered much of the same discussion as the previous book. Those seers who had used their abilities more frequently had appeared to become mentally unstable. More than one had even ended their own lives. 

Almost tossing the book aside, Elain dragged the next toward herself, opening it quickly and scanning the words. She glanced up when she felt Lucien’s cool fingers come to rest on the back of her neck. He was sitting straight in his own chair, a book in his lap as his eyes scanned the pages. He appeared to have reached out to her unconsciously and she smiled before looking back to the tome in her own lap. This one was a personal account, and Elain found herself relating to the confusion of the earlier chapters. This seer had discovered her gifts in her earlier years of life and, at first, she had not had much control over what she saw. Visions had come to her semi-regularly, much as they did for Elain. This seer had used what she had seen to help herself and others in her life, and then she had begun to try and develop more control, summoning visions when she needed them. This appeared to have carried on for decades as the seer had called on her gift more and more. 

Dread began to grow within Elain as the words she was reading began to make less and less sense. The story became nonsensical and Elain knew that the same thing had happened to this seer as had happened to the others she had read about. It wasn’t until she had closed the cover of the book and set it aside with the others that she realised she was crying. 

“Petal…” Lucien’s fingers slid down her neck to her shoulder and Elain turned to look up at him. He moved slowly, slipping from the chair to kneel on the carpet in front of her, his other hand coming up to her cheek and wiping the tears away. 

“They all went mad…” she breathed, her voice hitching. “All of them… when they tried to use it more… it … it ruined their minds…”

The way that Lucien’s eyes, both russet and gold, flicked to the book he had been reading before returning to meet her own gaze, told Elain that he had discovered the same thing she had. “That won’t happen to you.” He told her gently, his thumb caressing her cheek as he held her eyes with his own. “I won’t let it.”

Elain tried to hold in further tears, but she couldn’t so much as draw a breath without a sob escaping. “It already nearly did… when… when I first…” 

“No.” He wrapped his arms around her, drawing her in to his chest. “No… that was different.” He held her tightly to himself, and Elain allowed herself a deeper breath, “That was completely different, and you moved through that.”

“Lucien…” she breathed, “If I keep using it I’ll get lost…” she closed her eyes as she rested her cheek against his shoulder, “I’ll get lost in that place the visions come from, and I wont be able to find my way back…”

“No, you won’t.” He told her, one of his hands now moving in circles across her back. “You won’t get lost because I’ll always find you.” She felt his lips press against her hair, “If I have to tether you to myself, I will.” His hand paused then, and she could just about feel him thinking, she could see the thoughtful look on his face in her mind. “The bond already exists between us…” his voice was soft, and Elain found it comforting, “Do you remember how I tried to use it last time to reach you?”

“It felt funny… like you’d pulled at a string attached to a rib…” she was surprised that she did remember considering everything from that time was so foggy in her mind.

“Yes…” his hands stroked her slowly, “The bond is stronger now.” He murmured, “And it will only get stronger yet.” When she accepted it, she knew that he meant. “I will always be able to follow it to you. No matter where you are or where you go… I’ll follow.”

Elain lifted her head and pulled back just enough to look at his face. “Even there…?” she breathed, “Into that … nothingness…” She didn’t know exactly where those visions came from, but she knew that it was dark and confusing. 

“Even there.” He told her. 

Even as tears fell and traced their way down Elain’s cheeks, she leaned forward again, wrapping both of her arms around Lucien’s neck as she kissed him.


	125. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Five

**Chapter 125**

When Elain’s tears had dried a little, Lucien had packed up the books they had read and put them back on the shelves from where they had come. He had then taken Elain to the books on flowers across Prythian and she had selected several that she would like to look at more closely, and they had borrowed them. Lucien had carried them back to the palace and the room that he and Elain shared, and he set them now on the desk by the window. They had missed lunch, but they went looking for something to eat all the same. 

He had noticed well before they’d left the library, that Elain was quiet. She was also a little extra touchy with him, and he had noticed, not without some actual enjoyment, that she was keeping close beside him, her arm touching his or her hand resting on whatever part of his body was closest. Lucien hadn’t minded that she was touching him, but he was worried about how quiet she was being. He knew that he was talking more than usual in an attempt to make up for it, and to fill the silence. It wasn’t that their silences were ever uncomfortable or awkward, but he found himself almost desperate to hear her speak, and so he kept trying to ask her questions or get her involved in conversation with him.

After they had been wandering for a while, someone offered to send them a tray of food to their room as there would still be several hours before dinner. Lucien had cleared the books off the desk by the window and made space for the plates from the tray, and he sat down beside it, his eyes on Elain who was still silent. Her hands were twisting together in her lap and her brown gaze was focused upon the food in the middle of the desk.

“Anything look good to you?” he asked, hopeful. She nodded.

“It all looks nice.” She murmured.

Lucien watched her selecting bits and pieces to put onto her plate and then he tried to think of something else to ask her, wanting to get her talking again. “Out of all the flowers you have seen,” he began, “in all of the Courts, because you’ve seen them all now…” he watched as her brown eyes flicked up to meet his, “Do you have a new favourite flower?”

“I…” she bit her lip, “the Iceblume stands out…” she eventually said after a moment, then shook her head, “That wouldn’t be my favourite, though.” Lucien watched as she kept thinking, her eyes lighting up as she made a thoughtful sound, “Oh… “ she smiled softy at him, “Are Dahlias still your favourite?”

“I think so.” He replied and she nodded, resting her elbow on the table and then her chin in her hand. 

“I think… I really like the Love-in-a-mist.” Her smile brightened a little further and Lucien felt his blood heat. Just the name of the little blue flower brought the glade from the Spring Court to his mind. He could see the various colours of the flowers all around, and he thought about the first time he had kissed Elain. As his eyes moved across her face, he saw her blush just a little, and he knew that she was thinking about when they had gone back, when she had gone back on their picnic blanket and she had wrapped herself around him. The Love-in-a-mist was all of that, and it brought it all to mind. 

“Oh…” he smiled, “Is it too late to change my favourite?” he asked and Elain nodded.

“Yes.” She said, her voice brighter than he had heard it in several hours.

“You can’t steal my favourite.”

“But it comes with such delightful memories.”

“Then we will just have to make more.” She replied and Lucien agreed.

They finished their food quickly and he got up to clean away the dishes and set them by the door to be collected. He had just turned back around when he found Elain standing right behind him. “Petal?” he asked, unable to take her eyes off of him when she reached a hand out to him. “Are you alright?” he shivered when her hand moved down his chest. “Are you still thinking about earlier?”

“How could I not?” she asked, “It was as if I was having a vision of my own future, finding out what will happen to me…”

“No…” he told her, one of his hands running down her hair, “I said it before, and I’ll say it again; that won’t be you. It will not happen to you.”

“Lucien…” she breathed, her chest just about against his now as she looked up at him, “I just want to forget about it… help me forget…”

She looked so desperate, her dark eyes pleading, that Lucien could do nothing by nod. Her arms tightened around his waist as he bent to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Of course, my love.” He told her. “What do you want to do?”

“I…” Dark eyes flicked up to meet his for the briefest of moments, before looking away. “I want…” she bit her lip and Lucien felt a flicker of nervousness meet him down the bond. He slid both of his hands around her back, and down to her waist. His eyes remaining on her face, he just waited for her to tell him what it was that she wanted him to do. “I want you to fuck me until I can’t breathe.”

Lucien was pretty sure that he was the one who stopped breathing. Elain continued to look up at him, her eyes holding his gaze as her hands moved uncertainly across his back. “You… you what?” he asked, his voice shaky. 

“I want to forget what I read, I don’t want to think about it…” she whispered, “I want to feel safe… I want to feel you… you make me feel better…” one of her hands moved up his chest again ,”Please…” she breathed, “Make me feel better…”

“It won’t take it away…” he warned her, even as his hands slid down to lift Elain to himself. “It will still be there…”

“I know.” She told him, sinking her hands into his hair, “But it will be gone for now…”

“…Until you can’t breathe?” asked, already giving in and she nodded. He spared only a single glance for the bed before deciding against that. If Elain wanted distraction, he was going to give her something new. 

He carried her instead to the low vanity of the dresser that she used every day and he sat her atop it as he pulled her dress from her with deft hands. Elain moved as if to help him, but he beat her to it, shedding the Day Court clothing without any fuss. Lucien caught the appreciative look she gave him before his hands were on her once again and he took a firm hold of her hips, pulling her to the edge of the vanity. He heard her soft gasp as she sought to balance herself, and her legs went tightly around his waist as she leaned back against the mirror. “You want to forget about everything except me?” he asked, knowing that was exactly what she wanted. If she was after something to distract her, then he would play whatever role she needed him to play. 

“Yes…”

“Alright then.”


	126. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Six

**Chapter 126**

Elain’s eyes fluttered closed when Lucien’s large hands gripped her tightly. He pulled her to the edge of the vanity and she lifted one of her own hands to his shoulder, seeking to balance herself. He feet did not reach the carpet from here, and she wrapped her legs around his waist as her hand slid across his shoulder and up the back of his neck. She wanted him to distract her and, so far, he was doing an excellent job of it. 

When his warm lips pressed to her forehead, Elain opened her eyes to look up at him. He looked at little hesitant to she slid one of her hands down his chest, taking hold of him carefully and beginning to stroke him. The sound that Lucien made at that had Elain smiling as she continued to look up, holding his eyes with her own. “Is that good?” she asked gently, and he nodded, hands tightening on her hips. Elain felt her heartrate increase with Lucien’s as he grew harder and harder beneath her hand and, before long she could feel herself throbbing with the need of him. 

Thinking that Lucien was just going to fuck her, she jumped in surprise when she felt him push several fingers inside of her instead. “What are you doing?” she breathed, her hands clutching tightly at his broad shoulders when those fingers began to move. Lucien’s other hand slid around to her lower back, holding her in place as he continued to use his fingers on her. 

“You don’t like it?” he asked, grinning at her when she made a soft sound. 

“I… I do…” she twitched slightly when what felt like a bold of lightning flashed through her. “Ah…”

Lucien continued what he was doing for several moments before Elain gasped and he pulled his fingers from her. She could do nothing but watch him as he slowly, eyes locked on her own, lifted his hand up between them and slid one long finger into his mouth. Elain’s mind went blank. “Hmm…” he murmured, and her eyes followed as he pulled that finger from between his lips. “Still so delicious…” Elain could hear Lucien’s heart thundering in her head and she was stunned into silence as he grinned at her. “Why don’t you taste yourself…”

“I…” She met his eyes again when he brought his hand to her face, slipping his index finger carefully past her lips and into her mouth. Licking carefully at him, Elain blinked. It was an odd flavour that she wouldn’t have known how to describe if she had ever tried. Not, she thought, that she would ever be trying to describe that to anyone ever.

When Lucien pulled his finger from between her lips, Elain leaned back against the mirror once again as both of his hands went to her thighs, pulling her closer to the edge of the dresser again and widening them enough to move closer to her. She felt his thumbs pressing into the soft flesh there, and she wondered for a moment if she would have bruising. “Luci-”

He bent to kiss her, and Elain forgot anything more that she had been about to say. Lucien’s lips were perfect and soft against her own and she allowed him to deepen the kiss almost instantly. When he did so, Elain was unable to help a soft groan, her hands moving up into his hair, and tugging gently. She had been so caught up in his kiss that she had forgotten that she had asked him for more than that and she was unprepared for when one of his hands slid from her thigh to help position himself appropriately only an instant before he had pushed inside of her.

The grunt that Lucien made into the kiss as he pushed as far into her as he seemed able sent Elain’s blood hot and coursing through her. She tightened her hands around handfuls of his hair, trying to urge him on, and it seemed as if he needed no encouragement. Both of Lucien’s hands returned to Elain’s thighs and he used that vice-like grip on her to pull her to meet himself, while holding her legs open as wide as he needed to move freely between them. 

*

He was convinced that nothing had ever felt as good as being inside of Elain. Everything about this was perfect; her sweet heat, the way her hands clutched at him, the sounds she made as he moved, pushing into her over and over. It was all beyond compare, and there was nothing that he wouldn’t do for her. 

The moment he’d had that thought, Lucien remembered what she had asked him to do. _“… fuck me until I can’t breathe.”_ She needed him to distract her from the horrible things she had read about the other seers, and he was going to do his best to give her what she wanted. Tightening his grip on her thighs, Lucien increased his pace, moving more quickly and with purpose, his eyes on Elain’s face as he did so. He wanted to see the colour rise in her cheeks, wanted to see the effect this would have on her before he did anything else. Feeling Elain’s hands tugging on his hair let him know that he was doing the right thing, and it was only a few moments later that the soft sounds she was making began to become more frequent and he grit his teeth as he tried to maintain his rhythm.

Lucien wasn’t sure exactly what Elain had read in the couple of books she had gone through in the library earlier that day. He had felt her mood sinking as they had sat together and she had moved from one book to the next, and he knew that it had ended in tears. The books that he had gotten though had been depressing enough with just about every seer he had read about slowly losing their minds. Several of them had ended their own lives, but most had seemingly gone mad and slipped from the records. Elain’s reaction had suggested that what she had read was much the same thing. He had promised her that he would not let that happen to her, and he meant it. If the seers got lost in the place from which their visions came to them while trying to summon their abilities, then he would find a way to be able to keep that from happening to Elain. When she had first been Made Fae and had seemingly slipped out of herself in Velaris, he had tried to reach her through the bond, and that appeared to have had some effect. He would do that again. He knew that Elain was going to accept the bond, and he knew that it would only become stronger. It stood to reason that when the bond was even stronger than it was now, it would be easier to be able to tether himself to her and so always be able to find her, follow her, and bring her back to herself if he needed to. He meant what he had said. That was not going to happen to Elain. He would not allow it.

Try as he might, Lucien couldn’t help the sliver of fear that needled its way into his thoughts. What if he wasn’t good enough to bring her back? What if he couldn’t? He had promised that he would protect her in the Autumn Court, and so many awful things had nearly happened to her. Even when they were heading into the Dawn Court, he had nearly lost her because he had been unable to stop what his brothers had tried to do until the very last moment. What if it was the same with Elain’s abilities? What if she got so lost he couldn’t find her, even trying to follow the bond?

Elain’s hands slid from Lucien’s hair to his shoulders and he reached up to take hold of her wrists. Carefully he brought them down, gently moving them back around behind her own back where he grasped both of her wrists in one of his hands, holding them pinned there. He could feel her trying to move to meet his continued thrusts into her body and, for several moments, he let her. Elain was letting out small whining sounds as she moved, and Lucien only took a moment to identify when each of her breaths was being drawn and released. He allowed her to stay in that rhythm as he watched her face and then he changed things. 

Sliding one of his hands up Elain’s spine, still holding her wrists pinned behind her with the other, Lucien waited for a moment when she was about to take a gasping breath, and he shifted his rhythm, thrusting firmly into her and earning a cry from her instead. He did the same thing again the next time she went to draw breath, grunting as he held more firmly to her wrists when she tried to free them. He slid the hand from the back of her neck into her hair where he closed his fist around a handful of her golden brown hair and pulled it back, taking her head with it and exposing her throat to him. Watching her carefully, Lucien continued, timing his actions to Elain’s breaths, and listening as she began to whimper. She struggled a little and Lucien held firmly to her, settling into his new rhythm, listening to her as her gasping breaths continued to be cut off by small cries. Her skin was more than a little flushed and, when Elain let out a small shriek, Lucien bent to lick his way up her throat. She was unable to catch her breath with what he was doing and satisfaction moved through him. This was what she had asked him for and it pleased him to know that he had given it to her.

“Lucien…” her voice was barely a whisper, and he felt her twist her wrists again. He released them, keeping his other hand in her hair, and Elain lifted both of her hands to his face, holding him just above her so that she could meet his eyes. She was moving her hips to meet him again and Lucien couldn’t help himself. He lifted her from the dresser and turned, sinking to the floor and taking her with him. The bed was only a few paces away, but even that felt too far. He wanted this, here and now. He wanted to finish her. And he would. On the floor.


	127. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Seven

**Chapter 127**

Closing her eyes as the warm morning sun spilled across her, Elain gave a contented sigh. She had awoken earlier in the morning, wrapped around Lucien, with enough time for them to bathe and dress before breakfast. Now, as they sat out on one of the huge Day Court balconies, she couldn’t help yawning and stretching a little. She felt tired.

“You alright, Petal?” Lucien’s voice sounded amused and she cracked an eye open to peer at him. He was sitting in one of the chairs beside her, legs stretched out on another chair before him as he just about glowed in the sun. “Something keep you up all night?”

Elain couldn’t help but grin, and she closed her eyes again, turning her face up to the sun once more. “Maybe I could have a nap later.” She said softly.   
“Maybe you could have one now.” She heard him give a soft chuckle and she smiled. 

“Maybe I could.” Elain stretched again, feeling the ache within her easing as the heat of the sun sank into her. She let out a contented sigh, and lifted a hand when some part of her felt Lucien reaching out. Her smile widened when she found his hand stretched out toward her, and she linked her fingers through his, holding gently. 

They stayed that way for quite a while, and Elain wasn’t entirely certain if she had actually fallen asleep at some point, but then a shadow passed across her and her eyes flew open. “Oh…” she sat up straighter, squinting up at the silhouette standing over her. 

“Lucien, Elain…” Helion greeted them, a wide smile of his own stretching across his handsome face. “Apologies for the interruption.”

“No…” Elain murmured, “We weren’t doing anything…”

“Elain was sleeping.” Lucien put in and she turned to look at him. 

“I wasn’t…”

“You were. You haven’t heard a thing I’ve said in about an hour.”

“What?” she blinked, narrowing her eyes at him. “What were you saying?”

“You’ll never know.” He winked at her and then lifted his gaze to Helion once more. “Did you need us for something?”

“Not the both of you.” Helion was still smiling. “Elain may go back to sleep if she wishes…” Amber eyes moved over her for a moment before flicking to Lucien, “If you wouldn’t mind coming to join Eris and I. We have a few ideas that need to be discussed.”

“I can do that.” Lucien was on his feet in an instant, and Elain released his hand. He glanced down at her and gave her a wink. “I’ll see you in a little while, Petal.” She just nodded, watching as he followed Helion. Then, smiling to herself, Elain stretched back out in the sun and closed her eyes once again. Maybe she would finish that nap now. 

*

Walking beside Helion, Lucien couldn’t help but watch his father out of the corner of his eye. The High Lord walked easily, but with purpose, and Lucien found that he had matched his stride to the older male’s unconsciously. “What are some of these ideas you have had?” He asked, hoping to prepare himself for whatever conversations he was about to have to have with Eris. 

“Well, it’s not something we figure we should work on without the others.”

“Oh…” Lucien nodded, figuring he knew where this was heading.

Eris was sitting at the large round table when Helion led the way into the room, and Lucien recognised the thoughtful expression on his brother’s face. This was something that Eris actually cared about. Taking up a seat, Lucien placed both of his hands on the table, clasping them together as he looked at both of the High Lords. “What is it that you would like me to do?” he asked. 

“We need a meeting of all the High Lords.” Eris said, his voice even. 

“You want me to organise it?”

“You know everyone.” 

“So, I would wager, do you.” Lucien replied, and Eris looked at him.

“I have not organised something like this before.” Eris said, “You have done it dozens of times. Also, you’re currently the Emissary to the Night Court. I don’t have my own Emissary to ask…”

“Why don’t you have one?” Lucien asked Helion, turning his eyes on his father. Helion’s eyes darkened for a moment. 

“I have not replaced my last…” He said softly, “He died in the battle against Hybern.”

“Ah…” Lucien nodded, frowning for a moment. “Okay… When would you like this meeting to take place?”

“As soon as possible.” Helion replied, “Here.”

Looking questioningly at Eris, Lucien raised an eyebrow. “Two of us are already here…” Eris said. 

“Also,” Helion put in, “this would be a good opportunity for me to claim you in front of all the Courts of Prythian…” Lucien stared at him. 

“You… you want… oh… okay…” He blinked, trying to force his brain to work again. If Helion claimed him as his son in front of all of the High Lords, that was as good as declaring him his heir. That would be announcing to everyone that Lucien would be the next High Lord of the Day Court. 

“That is,” Helion said, “of course, if you agree to that.”

“Yes…” Lucien nodded. He hadn’t so much as needed to think about it. It wasn’t that he particularly wanted to be the High Lord. He had never in his life desired anything like that, but a family… He wanted the chance to belong to a family, and to a place. Helion was ready to accept him as family, and Lucien wanted that with everything in him.

“Alright.” Helion’s smile was as radiant as the sun. “Then, Emissary,” he went on. “A meeting of the High Lords… Here. As soon as is possible.”

Running a hand through his hair, Lucien nodded, his mind already drafting letters. 

“Shall we leave you to it?” Eris asked, getting to his feet, and Lucien nodded again.

When Helion and Eris left the room, Lucien set about writing to Rhys first. 

_  
Rhysand,_

_Firstly, the High Lord of the Day Court, and the High Lord of the Autumn Court would request your presence, and the presence of the High Lady of the Night Court. They wish to hold a meeting of all the High Lords (and Lady) from across Prythian. This is to discuss the proposed trade routes, and measures needed to establish them as soon as is possible. No doubt, other projects and progress will also be discussed, and this could be a most productive meeting for the benefit of all of Prythian should it go ahead successfully.  
This meeting is to be held at your earliest convenience. You would be hosted at the Day Court. Please indicate a time that suits you so that we can more forward with preparation. _

_Secondly, anything that you and Feyre could do to help get everyone here as soon as possible would be greatly appreciated._

_Thirdly, I feel that if Nesta were to join you when you come, Elain would be happy. We have discovered some uninspiring information about Seers, and I think her sisters would be of some support._

_Lucien_

Staring at the letter he had just penned, Lucien considered adding that Helion intended to claim him as his son, but decided against it. Rhys would find out soon enough, no doubt as soon as he arrived in the Day Court. There was really no point in adding it to the letter. Besides, he had four more letters to write and send to the Spring, Winter, Summer, and Dawn Courts. He had no doubt that the High Lords of all of the Courts would show up, although he figured that Tamlin would be the hardest to convince. Not because he thought that Tamlin had no interest in bettering Prythian or in getting involved in re-establishing the old trade routes, but rather his old friend would not be keen to face Feyre and Rhys, or to feel as if he was being judged by everyone else. Whether or not that actually happened, Lucien knew that in Tamlin’s mind, that would almost certainly be the case.

By the time he had finished writing all of the letters, Lucien knew that the midday meal was being served, and he headed off to find Elain and something to eat.


	128. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Eight

**Chapter 128**

Over the next few days, the High Lords began sending in their replies to Lucien’s letters, and he began compiling possible dates for the meeting that Helion and Eris wanted. As pretty much everybody was on good terms for the first time he could recall in a while, it was easier than previous meetings he had tried to organise. It was decided that the High Lords would all come to the Day Court by the end of the week and, when they had all arrived, they would work out the plan and contributions for the reestablishment of the trade routes. For just about the first time ever, Lucien was fairly confident that they would be able to come to some arrangement within a couple of days, and nobody would be too put out at all. He couldn’t remember the last time he was this hopeful about a meeting of the High Lords.

He found Helion out on one of the balconies that the High Lord favoured in the afternoons, and Lucien seated himself in a vacant chair with a flop. Helion raised an eyebrow at him, steepling his fingers. “You have news?”

“I do.” Running his hand through his hair, Lucien smiled. “They have all agreed to be here within the week.”

“That is impressive.”

“I think that they’re all keen to get these trade routes up again, because it will benefit each of them.”

“Good.” Helion leaned back in his seat. “If they’re all motivated to get it happening then there will be no resistance to the idea.”

“I think also,” Lucien went on, “that because they know what to expect, because they have a model of what it will look like, being what it was before Amarantha put a stop to it, they are able to envision what benefit they would have and how it would work.”

“That’s probably true.” Helion was looking at him, eyes intent. “One does tend to fear the unknown.”

“Some do.” Lucien muttered, twisting his hands a little in his lap. 

“Do you have something on your mind?”

Letting out a small huff, Lucien considered. Helion was far older than he was, and had been the High Lord of the Day Court for centuries. It was no secret that the Day Court had been in charge of collecting Pyrthian’s knowledge, so it would stand to reason that Helion held a great deal of that knowledge himself. “Do… you know much about seers?”

“Oh.” The High Lord crossed one graceful leg over the other, his eyes still intent upon Lucien. “What is it that you would like to know?”

“Elain and I did some reading… and… nearly everything we found suggested that seers tend to lose their minds.”

Helion nodded slowly, his amber gaze solemn, and Lucien’s heart sank. “It is not uncommon.” The High Lord said softly.

“Not _uncommon_?” Lucien asked, honing in on that one word. “Does that mean not inevitable?”

“Certainly it’s not inevitable.”

“How?” He was leaning forward in his chair now, his eyes on his father. “What can I do?”

“You?” Helion just about purred the word.

“Yes.” Lucien told him, “Whatever it is, I will do it…”

“And if it’s not up to you?”

Lucien set his jaw, blinking slowly. “I will ensure it is done.”

“The seer…” Helion began, “needs to properly anchor themselves.” He looked at Lucien. “Often their minds seek visions and they lose their way back to themselves. If they have a way to find their path home…”

“A tether.” Lucien murmured the word mor to himself than Helion but the High Lord appeared to hear him nonetheless. 

“Yes.” Helion tilted his head, “Is that what your instinct told you?”

“I told Elain I could use the bond to find her, and bring her back.” Lucien ran a hand over his face. 

“That would be effective.” Helion agreed, his eyes crinkling at the edges. “The Cauldron has provided her with what she needs. When it Made her, it gave her this gift of Sight. It also gave her you, someone who would know how to save her.”

Lucien looked at Helion silently. “I didn’t know.” He murmured after several moments. “I was guessing…”

“You were going off of your instinct, which is exactly what you should do. Trust yourself.”

“I can’t gamble…” Lucien said, “Not with her.”

“You are the son of the High Lord of the Day Court.” Helion told him firmly, “This kind of thing is exactly what we are good at.”

 _Spell-Cleaver_. Lucien tilted his own head, looking again at Helion. “I… I have used… some of the magic I think came from you…”

“Oh?” there was a note of interest in the High Lord’s voice then, and Lucien nodded.

“When Hybern had Elain thrown into the Cauldron and then dumped on the floor, before I even knew her… I broke the spell he had on me, binding me… I wanted to get to her so desperately that… I … just… did…”

“Before you even knew her?”

“I knew that she was Feyre’s sister… a human… that was about it.” He paused for a second, “I suppose part of me recognised that she was my mate…”

“Likely.” Helion’s eyes moved over Lucien again before the High Lord smiled. “Any other talents of mine?”

“In the Autumn Court when a few of my brothers came to kill me in the night…” Lucien cast his mind back to the night he had awoken to a blade at his throat, and Elain face down on the bed with his brother’s knee in her back. “One of them held Elain… and… I… burned him… with light?” He still didn’t understand exactly what had happened, but he was thankful that whatever he had done had been effective.

“Your mate has brought your true nature to light…” Helion smiled brightly at him. “So to speak…”

The corner of Lucien’s lips quirked in a smile at that. “Yes…” He ran his hands through his hair again, glancing once again at Helion. What the High Lord had told him had done rather a lot to soothe his mind, and his heart. He would have to tell Elain what he had learned, and he knew that it would soothe her as well. She would have no further reason to fear her abilities, or fear what she was . The fact that they were mates would protect her. She hadn’t been Made one without the other. Helion was right. The Cauldron had looked after her when it had done as it had. 

“No doubt you wish to share this information with Elain.”

“I do.” Lucien couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you. I know that she will find I comforting, knowing that you agree that we have a way of preventing her from going the way all the others we read about have.”

“If you would like to find some books on seers who did not go mad…” Helion’s face was thoughtful for a moment, “The library to the north of the city…”

“That would be most welcome.” Lucien made a mental note to get to that library. 

“While there,” Helion told him, “You would also find some histories of several of the previous High Lords of this Court…”

Lucien’s gaze caught on Helion’s amber eyes, his breath catching in his throat. He hadn’t considered doing that. If he could read about the previous High Lords he could learn so much about his family and, even possibly, his abilities. The thought of that knowledge heated his blood and he nodded enthusiastically. “I will…”

“Excellent.”

Getting to his feet, Lucien looked at his father once again. “Thank you.” He said, “Really. Thank you for speaking with me about this… Elain… all of it…”

Helion just smiled at him and nodded. “It was my pleasure, Lucien.”


	129. Chapter One Hundred and Twenty-Nine

**Chapter 129**

Lucien was busy over the next couple of days, trying to get everything organised for the meeting between the High Lords and so Elain had spent quite a bit of time with Ashk. Pleased that the Lady of the Autumn Court was still in the Day Court, and would be until Eris was finished after the meeting being organised, Elain had taken the opportunity to get to know her better. She had already liked her, Elain had decided that the day they had met back in the Autumn Court, but she had learned so much more about her in the past few days. 

Elain had learned that, when she was relaxed, Lucien’s mother could be funny. Her subtle humour had seemed almost shy at first, but had become more and more prevalent and confident the more they got to know one another, and Elain was now able to see where Lucien had gotten his wit from. She was more than beautiful and sweet and it was evident why someone like Helion would risk war with the Autumn Court to have been with her. Elain would have bet that before she had been married to Beron, Ashk could have had her pick of any of the males who had looked her way.

The two of them had walked all the halls of the palace with Elain hunting down appropriate flowers for her book, and Ashk talking. Mostly they had talked about Lucien, and Elain had enjoyed getting to hear about him as a youngling. The memories that the bond had showed her hadn’t been happy or joyous, and she supposed that had been because being back in his old home hadn’t brought up those memories for Lucien. Ashk remembered lighter moments; those were what she had held on to. Elain had smiled as she had listened, thankful that there had been happy moments for him, and not everything had been painful.

Ashk had invited Elain and Lucien to visit the Autumn Court for Mabon, and also told Elain that Helion had begun talking about future plans for the Day Court which involved Lucien. The High Lord was apparently excited by the prospect of his son possibly remaining in the Court, and Elain hoped that Lucien knew that Helion wanted him to stay. 

As the sun began to set, Elain closed up her book and slipped everything back into her pocket as the golden light spilled luxuriously through the windows and into the hallways of the palace. “Lucien said that the last of the High Lords would be arriving this evening.” She told Ashk.

“It was Rhysand, with your sister, of course.” Ashk replied, “And Kallias?”

“I believe so.”

“We should probably return for the dinner, then.” 

“Yes.” Elain allowed the Lady of the Autumn Court to link their arms together as they headed back toward the part of the palace where the private suites were. She was excited for the dinner, not only because the mere prospect of all of the High Lords in one room was thrilling, but because Lucien had told her that Nesta might be coming with Feyre. She hadn’t seen her sisters in entirely too long and, after everything that had happened in the Dawn Court, and everything they had found out since, Elain was dying to hug Nesta.

*

Lucien hurried into the room that he shared with Elain, knowing that he didn’t have much time. He needed to bathe and get changed for the banquet, and he had only just finished putting everything together for the meeting in the morning. When he pushed the door open and slipped inside, he found Elain sitting on the bed. She was dressed, and he paused for a moment, just looking at her. 

“Hi…” she said softly, getting to her feet.

“You are the most breathtaking creature I have ever laid my eyes on…” The words were true, and Lucien smiled when a pretty blush spread across Elain’s cheeks as she lowered her gaze, her hands twisting together before her. Crossing the room to her, Lucien wrapped an arm loosely around her waist, drawing her to himself and pressing his lips to her forehead. She laughed then, her own hands coming up to push gently at him. 

“You have to get ready.”

“I do.” Forcing himself to let her go, Lucien allowed his eyes to move over her once more. She was wearing a dress cut in the Day Court fashion but, unlike the casual dress she had been in before, this one was in a pale lilac colour that suited her perfectly. As his eyes moved higher once more, Lucien noticed that her hair had been done up in a style that some of the Day Court faeries had seemed to favour and, when she noticed where his attention was focused, Elain lifted a hand to touch her hair gently. 

“What do you think?” she asked. 

“It…” he nodded, “suits you.”

“You think so?”

“Yes.” He did think so. She looked as if she truly belonged here now, and the thought sent a pleasant shiver of satisfaction moving through him. Elain smiled, and he returned the smile easily. “Alright… I am going to bathe quickly.”

“There’s clothing laid out for you.” She told him, indicating the bed behind her. “Helion had it sent when he sent my dress.”

Tilting his head, Lucien eyed the bed, not sure what he was expecting. He didn’t mind what he found, however. It was in much the same style as what he already wore, but in a richer fabric. Smiling again at his mate, Lucien then turned and headed into the bathroom, striping off as he went.

He returned only about ten minutes later, his towel around his hips. Elain was standing by the window and made no secret of the fact that she was watching him as he approached the bed and what he was to wear. Lucien made a show of pretending that he hadn’t noticed her eyes on him as he removed the towel and got dressed, exaggerating each move he made. Elain’s light giggle made him smile and he finally cast a glance her way. 

“If I wasn’t so excited for this banquet, I would suggest that we make our excuses and remain here for the night.” She said. 

“You’re excited for the banquet?” He asked, smiling. 

“Oh, yes.” She grinned, and he could feel her excitement from across the room. “Also, I can’t wait to see Nesta and Feyre.”

“I’m sure.” He moved toward the vanity, picking up a comb to pull through his hair. “They are being shown to their suits now.” He told her, “They will be ready for the banquet by the time it is expected to begin.”

“Did you see them?” Elain asked, approaching him from behind, and Lucien met her curious gaze in the mirror. “How did they look?”

“They looked well.” He said, turning around to look at her properly. “I would say they are both keen to see you as well. Especially Nesta.” He was pleased with the wide smile that brought to Elain’s face. She was practically bounding on the balls of her feet and he set the comb down to get to his own feet. If she was dying this much to go and see her family, he wouldn’t make her wait any longer. “Alright,” he said, offering her his hand. “Let us go and wait in the hall.”

Elain took his hand faster than he had seen her move before. “Yes.” She said and, the moment she touched his skin, Lucien felt her longing even more powerfully. He hadn’t realised how much she had missed her sisters, but he could feel it sharply now and he tightened his grip on her hand. This would be an interesting evening for so many reasons; he just hoped it went well.


	130. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty

**Chapter 130**

The hall was glittering when Elain and Lucien walked through the doors. The first thing that Elain noticed was how opulent everything looked, the second was that most of Helion’s Court appeared to be present. Faeries of all description milled about the place, a murmur of excitement in the air, and she clung tightly to Lucien’s hand when that murmur increased as those closest to the doors noticed their entry. 

“Tarquin and Thesan are over there…” Lucien’s voice was soft and Elain looked in the direction that he had indicated. She nodded as she spotted the two High Lords standing by the window, already deep in discussion with one another. As she watched, Eris strode toward Tarquin and Thesan and joined their conversation. 

“There is so much power in this room.” She murmured, turning her head to look at Lucien who nodded his head in agreement. 

“That is certainly true.” He replied, lifting her hand to his lips with a smile. “If it becomes too much to bear, let me know and we will sneak away…”

“We can’t do that.” She grinned at him. “Helion intends to make an announcement that you kind of need to be present for.”

“Do I?” he asked, “They all know who I am.”

“You need to be here.” She told him, reaching her free hand up to smooth over the smooth material across his chest, “So that you can see the pride in his eyes when he tells them all who you are to him.”

Pleasure slid down the bond to Elain then, and she smiled more widely at Lucien. He looked to be practically glowing and she knew that he hadn’t truly intended to sneak out. She knew that he would have if she had asked it, but she could feel that he wanted to see Helion publicly acknowledge him. He wanted to see that connection acknowledged. “I suppose we must endure then, Petal.”

“I am certain that you will manage.”

She felt the moment Nesta entered the room, and turned her head to scan the crowd. “What is it?” Lucien asked, his grip on her hand firm.

“Nesta…” Elain grinned when she saw her sister standing by the doors, her expression calculating. Elain didn’t release Lucien’s hand to run across the room to her sister, but she dragged him quickly, dodging faeries who stood in the way. “Nes!”

Her sister’s face softened when she caught sight of Elain, and Nesta uncrossed her arms to wrap them around Elain the moment that she was in reach. Grinning, Elain slid her free arm around her older sister’s waist, holding her close for a few moments. “Elain, are you alright?” Nesta’s voice was gentle, and Elain nodded when her sister released her enough to step back and look intently at her face. 

“I am.” She replied, her own eyes looking Nesta over when both of Nesta’s hands came up to her face, holding gently as she was inspected. 

“You look well.” Nesta’s eyes flicked past Elain for a moment to Lucien, and Elain couldn’t read the expression that flashed quickly through her sister’s eyes. “He’s taken care of you.” Those pale eyes were once again on Elain who nodded. 

“Of course.” Still not having let go of Lucien’s hand, Elain pulled gently until he came to stand next to her, and she glanced up at him to see both his eyes on Nesta.

“Are you well, Nesta?” he asked, and Elain flicked her gaze toward her sister who actually looked surprised for a second. 

“Yes, I am.” The answer was clipped, before her sister appeared to relax an instant later. “I’ve just been worried. After what we heard happened in the Dawn Court…”

“That seems so long ago now.” Elain said, squeezing Lucien’s hand when she felt tension from him.

“It wasn’t.” Nesta replied. 

They all turned to look when a light bell sounded and one of Lucien’s hands found it’s way to Elain’s lower back. “That’s the bell to be seated.” He said gently. He gestured toward the long table cleaving the room in half, and gave a slight bow. “Ladies…”

Elain saw Nesta raise an eyebrow at him, but her elder sister allowed Lucien to lead the both of them toward the table. They found little name cards lining the table and, as they searched for their names, Elain hoped that she wouldn’t find herself in some undesirable position near those she didn’t know as she didn’t think she had the energy to try and answer a million questions and make sure she was appropriately proper and engaging. She didn’t want to spend the evening ensuring that she was perfect. Besides, there were many here she had missed and would much rather have the chance to catch up with. 

When she found her name, Elain let out a sigh of relief. She was seated on Lucien’s left and Nesta was directly across the table from her so she would be able to look at and speak to her easily. She smiled when she saw the white-blonde hair of the faerie sitting in the chair to her own left and as she sank down into her seat, Elain met the pale eyes that turned to look at her. 

“Viviane.” She greeted.

“Elain.” Viviane smiled back at her. “I had hoped that I would see you here.”

“I am glad to see you, also.” Elain smoothed her dress over her legs as she tucked herself in at the table, her eyes moving up and down, taking those near to them in. Kallias was on the other side of Viviane, and Elain gave him a smile when he met her eyes. 

“How has your collection of Prythian’s flowers come along?”

“I am nearly finished, I believe.” Elain told Viviane. “The Day Court was the final I had to visit, and I added a few more today.”

“I look forward to seeing it when it is complete.”

“I will bring you a copy.” Elain said softly, “I would very much like to visit the Winter Court again.” She cast a smile at Lucien, remembering the conversation they had had not long ago where she had told him they needed to return to the Winter Court as it was the only court they had not had sex in. She didn’t need to tell Viviane that, however.

“You would be most welcome.” Viviane’s voice was friendly, and Kallias nodded his agreement beside her. When Viviane leaned toward Elain almost conspiratorially, Elain leaned in to meet her, straining to hear the other female’s soft voice. “You are not properly mated yet?” 

“Soon…” Elain breathed, feeling her cheeks heat. “I… I want to do it here.”

Viviane’s white smile was so excited and so genuine that Elain felt a rush of affection for her. “Oh, that is wonderful. I hope that it is beautiful. I am certain it will be.”

“Thank you.” Elain felt herself blush again and her eyes flicked toward Nesta who was watching them from across the table. “Oh, do you remember my elder sister?” She asked Viviane, “This is Nesta.”

“Yes, I recall.” Viviane gave Nesta a smile and Elain was pleased to see her sister return the smile with real emotion. 

A hush fell across the table, and everyone’s eyes turned in the direction of the doors as they swung open and Helion entered the room, Ashk at his side. Elain slipped her hand into Lucien’s beneath the table when she felt his surprise down the bond. It seemed as if all eyes followed Helion and Ashk to the table where they sank into chairs, Helion on Lucien’s other side. Squeezing his hand, Elain gave Lucien an encouraging smile when he sat a little straighter. She then couldn’t help but watch as Feyre hurried into the hall, followed by Rhysand.   
Her sister’s eyes met hers when Feyre was halfway to the table and she smiled again. Feyre took up a seat beside Nesta across the table and Elain couldn’t wipe the wide smile off of her face. She had missed her sisters so very much and now she had both reason and excuse to just look at them throughout the whole dinner as they sat across from her. She would have to thank whoever had placed the name cards at the table, as they had evidently thought of her.

“Are you happy, Petal?” Lucien asked her and she looked up at him through her lashes. Nodding, she squeezed his hand yet again.


	131. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-One

**Chapter 131**

So many thoughts and emotions were swirling through Lucien during dinner that he could hardly make sense of any of them. His own were confusing and many, but Elain’s were clear enough. His mate was so unbelievably happy, that he didn’t even need to be touching her to feel it as clearly as if the emotions were his own. Unable to wipe the smile off of his face, Lucien watched Elain talking animatedly to her sisters across the table and Viviane beside her. Every so often, she would look at him, a smile of her own lighting her face up as brightly as the sun. Warmth flushed through Lucien when Elain’s hand wrapped around his under the table and she rested her own hand in his in his lap.

Realising that, even though she was so very happy and excited to be with her sisters again, she still wanted contact with him, Lucien’s heart just about ached. He ran his thumb gently back and forth across the back of her hand as he smiled at her and then turned his attention back to Helion who was saying something to Rhys about tomorrow morning. The conversation carried on in a light manner, with nothing too important being discussed as not every High Lord was within earshot, and then the discussion moved on to the food.   
The chatter in the room continued on throughout the banquet, and Lucien liked how easy everyone in the room appeared to be. He had never seen a banquet at which all of the High Lords were present go so smoothly, with such light-hearted conversation. Lucien had been to dozens of such events, and there had always been an undercurrent of mistrust and tension. Beron, though, had always been at the centre of it all. His eyes sliding toward Eris, he observed his brother silently. He could tell that Eris wasn’t entirely comfortable. Over the last few days his brother had been comfortable, Lucien had noticed that. But now, he was a little on edge. Although he was receiving nothing but polite conversation, and was being included in all going on around him, it appeared as if Eris was expecting someone to try and take a piece out of him at any moment. 

When the dinner was complete, Lucien was surprised at how quickly the table was cleared. Within several more minutes the table itself was disassembled and removed from the room to be replaced by smaller tables, to allow for smaller group conversations, and several comfortable couches. Those at the tables had broken into little groups, and Lucien scanned quickly for Elain, his eyes landing on her as she sat laughing on a couch with her sisters. He could feel her contentment across the room, and he decided to let her have some time with Nesta ad Feyre without him. Setting himself to that decision, Lucien turned away, his eyes continuing to scan the room. 

Spotting Eris standing by himself by a window, Lucien let out a slow breath and headed toward him. Eris’ eyes moved over him quickly before settling on his face. “Lucien.”

“Eris.” Lucien tilted his head, still able to tell just how carefully the older male was holding himself. 

“You appear to be settling in here well.”

“Do I?”

“You and Elain both.” Eris leaned back against the wall, crossing one foot over the other almost casually. “The clothes…” he said pointedly, his amber eyes flicking up and down Lucien once more. Unable to help himself, Lucien ran a hand self-consciously over the smooth material, again wishing that the thing was longer. “It actually suits you.” Eris added after a moment. “Lucky. Imagine if it didn’t…”

Letting out a huff of a laugh, Lucien had to agree. It would be rather unfortunate if he did look terrible in the traditional clothing of his father’s Court, especially as Helion intended to claim him publicly. “True…”

“What’s true?” Tamlin’s voice had Lucien turning to face his old friend as the High Lord of Spring approached. Lucien just shook his head, indicating that it didn’t matter. “It’s impressive that you got everyone here so quickly…” Tamlin said softly, and Lucien eyed him. 

“I’m surprised that you came.” He wasn’t really, but he didn’t know what else to say. The look that Tamlin gave him then told Lucien that his friend knew exactly what he had just thought. 

“Elain seems happy…”

Blinking, Lucien glanced across the room to his mate and then back to Tamlin. “She hasn’t seen her sisters in a while.”

“Nesta scares me.” Tamlin’s voice was blunt and Eris choked back a laugh, raising a hand to cover his mouth politely. 

“That’s because you’re not a complete imbecile, despite persistent rumour.” Lucien replied, grinning when Tamlin frowned at him. 

“She is rather impressive.” Eris put in, his voice quieter than usual. Lucien just nodded, his gaze shifting to his brother. “I don’t know if I pity or envy the male who ends up with her…”

Lucien thought of Cassian and grinned. “He deserves it.”

*

Elain’s face hurt from smiling so much. She made a face, trying to adjust her expression, opening her eyes when Nesta stopped mid-sentence. “What are you doing?” her older sister asked, an odd expression on her own beautiful face. 

“Nothing.” Elain tried to surreptitiously massage her face. “What were you saying?”

“I was saying, that I was quite surprised when I saw you… in… that…” Nesta reached a delicate hand out to touch the lilac dress Elain wore. 

“Me too.” Feyre put in, a smirk twisting her lips.

“Why?” Elain asked, “This is what is worn here…”

“Yes, but remember how you wouldn’t even wear the Illyrian leathers and Viviane had to give you something from the Winter Court even though it was far too hot…?” the words practically bubbled out of Feyre and Elain crossed her arms.

“What are you saying?”

Feyre shrugged, but the look in her eyes told Elain exactly what she was saying or, rather, what she was thinking. Elain blushed. She knew that she was scarlet because her face was utterly burning. 

“Uh…” Nesta made an odd sound and Elain slanted a glance at her. Her sister was looking at her with an expression that Elain couldn’t decipher and, before she could ask her what she was thinking, Helion’s loud voice echoed throughout the room and everyone fell silent.

Twisting on the couch, Elain sat a little higher to watch across the room as Helion moved to stand where everyone could see him. Faeries around the hall shifted and a soft murmur lifted when Ashk moved to stand near to the High Lord of the Day Court. Elain saw him smile gently at her and then she scanned the room for Lucien, figuring that she knew what was about to happen. 

“I thought they were going to begin their meeting in the morning?” Nesta half whispered to Feyre who nodded.

“That is what we were told.” Feyre replied, “He told us we would begin after breakfast…”

“Shh…” Elain smiled at them. “Just watch…” she couldn’t wipe the grin off of her face as she turned back to the rest of the room, still looking for Lucien. When she found him standing near the wall with Eris and Tamlin, she noticed the nervousness she could feel coming from him. He was standing straight, a hand lifted and rubbing the back of his neck while his eyes, both russet and gold, were focused on his father. His heart was thundering loudly in her head and she couldn’t help holding her own breath as Helion called for everyone to listen closely.


	132. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Two

**Chapter 132**

Lucien felt as if his heart was going to smash its way out of his chest. He wasn’t sure if he was imagining it, or if his ribs actually hurt. He was also struggling to draw a complete breath as Helion smiled around the room at the fae assembled there and listening to him. 

“Firstly,” the High Lord of the Day Court began, “I want to thank you all for coming, especially those of you who have come from quite a distance.” There was a moment of brief, polite, applause from the courtiers before Helion went on. “There is actually more than one reason I wanted this gathering to happen as soon as possible.” Helion’s amber eyes found Lucien and pinned him to the spot, and Lucien was more than a little certain that he had stopped breathing. “You all know why you are here, and what we will do tomorrow, but tonight…” Helion’s grin widened, and his gaze swept the room again. Lucien knew that the High Lord was enjoying the drama, he always had enjoyed this kind of attention. “I would like to make it known to all of you present here now … that I have a son.”

Lucien had expected the whispering that erupted throughout the hall at those words. The sound was hushed quickly, however, as everyone was keen to hear the next thing that Helion would say. The High Lord didn’t say anything however, he simply strode across the room to Lucien, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, and pulling Lucien to his side. The whispering erupted again and Lucien’s eyes caught on the absolute shock on Tamlin’s face.

Helion’s tone had changed when he spoke then. Gone was the flair and the extravagance and, in its place, was the seriousness of the formal words which he said loudly and clearly. “As the High Lord of the Day Court, I hereby acknowledge Lucien Vanserra as my blooded son and gift to him all positions, rights, privileges, and responsibilities that this status entails.” Helion’s eyes turned on Lucien then “You don’t use the Vanserra name, do you?”

“No…” Lucien couldn’t make his voice any louder than a whisper and Helion’s eyes were bright at he met his gaze. 

“He shall henceforth be known as Lucien Spell-Cleaver.”

Lucien stared at him and Helion gave him a small smile. “You’ve apparently proven you have that ability.” His father said, low enough that only Lucien would have heard him. More loudly, he spoke so that the entire hall could hear him once again. “Do you accept this acknowledgement as my son?”

“I accept.” Lucien forced his own voice to be steady then, and he was rather pleased with how calm he sounded, even though his heart was still trying to break its way out through his ribs. He blinked as more applause broke out around the hall, and he tried to find Elain among the movement as several fae watching began milling around as if trying to get a better look at him. The couch she had been sitting on was not visible, and he resisted a sigh, turning his attention then to those fae who had approached Helion and himself. 

Lucien spent the next little while being congratulated by seemingly half the faeries in the hall. All of the High Lords came to speak to him as well as an endless parade of Helion’s Courtiers who were much more interested in him than they had ever been. He figured that they would likely have decided they had more reason to get to know him now that Helion had claimed him as his son because there was probably more chance that they would be seeing him frequently and, even possibly, serving in his Court someday.

When Tamlin gave him a light clap on the shoulder and stepped aside, looking as thoroughly shocked as Lucien had seen him about anything ever, Lucien turned his eyes on the blonde priestess who approached. “Well, wasn’t this just a thoroughly exciting evening?” She asked, stepping forward and reaching up to wrap her arms around him. 

“Uh… Thank you, Sorcha.” Lucien bent so that she could reach him. He had noticed that just about everyone in the Day Court appeared to be a hugger. Lucien didn’t think that he had been hugged this often in his entire life. It was probably something he was going to have to get used to. 

“I suppose I will see you around.” Sorcha smiled widely at him, her perfect teeth gleaming just as brightly as Helion’s own did. “I’ll keep an eye out.”

“I’m sure.” Lucien stepped back when she released him. She looked up at him, her hand trailing down his arm from his shoulder, and he just watched as her big eyes turned to Helion standing beside him. 

“High Lord.” She purred, giving a light curtsey before striding away. Lucien watched her for a moment before looking at his father. 

“She… is friendly.”

“Ah, yes.” Helion nodded, his amber eyes flicking around the room and narrowing slightly. Lucien glanced around, wondering what was happening, but before he had figured it out, Helion had touched him gently on the shoulder. “Excuse me.”

Lucien had tried to watch for a moment, his eyes following Helion across the room before someone else stepped in front of him to congratulate him and he lost sight of the High Lord. 

“ _How dare you_!” Eris’ voice reached Lucien across the hall and Lucien frowned as he turned to watch. His brother was standing beside their mother, and the High Lord of the Autumn Court was glaring at one of Helion’s courtiers. As Lucien watched, Helion hurried across to them, coming to stand beside the Lady of the Autumn Court. Helion slid an arm around her shoulders, looking at the dark-haired courtier before them. The courtier bowed slightly before hurrying away, and Lucien tilted his head, wondering what had just happened. 

“Lucien.”

“Tam?” He glanced around at the blond who was standing beside him again, before looking back to his mother. 

“He should make a command.” Tamlin said gently. “Stop them…”

“Stop what?” Lucien frowned. 

“What they’re saying about your mother.”

Lucien turned completely around to look at Tamlin. “ _What_?”

Tamlin’s green eyes shifted around the room before meeting his own eyes. “You have been distracted…” his friend said. “There has been comment about her… disloyalty.”

Lucien turned quickly back around to look at his mother across the hall. Of course Helion acknowledging him as his son would bring to light the fact that his mother had had an affair with Helion and thus betrayed her marriage to Beron. He watched her with guilt swirling within him. His entire existence brought shame to her, and he was surprised that she could even stand to be around him let alone love him as she had his entire life. A jolt moved through Lucien when his mother’s russet eyes met his across the hall, and she gave him a small smile. Returning her smile, Lucien felt a rush of affection for her, knowing that she did love him, and that she was happy that Helion had acknowledged him, even if it meant that gossip would circulate about her. He listened then as Helion made a loud announcement that anyone overheard engaging in salacious gossip would be answering to him, and he heard Tamlin give a satisfied hum of approval. 

“I need to sit down.” Lucien muttered, moving for a nearby couch. Tamlin followed him, sinking down beside him, and Lucien could feel his friend watching him closely. 

“Did you know that he was going to do that?”

“Claim me in front of everyone?” Lucien asked, nodding slowly. “Yes.” He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes moving around the hall again, looking for Elain. He hadn’t seen her since before Helion had addressed everyone. 

“It’s a big deal.” Tamlin said, and Lucien eyed him. 

“Yes.”

“Rhys is going to fire you.”

“What? Why?”

“You’re the heir to the Day Court. You have no business being the Emissary to the Night Court now.”

“I guess that’s up to Rhys.” Lucien leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. He could feel so very many eyes still on him as people from all around the hall watched him. 

“I know that you know this,” Tamlin began softly, “But you’re going to have to watch people who approach you now.” Lucien leaned back against the couch, his eyes on his friend, “Nearly everyone is going to want something from you…”

Lucien did know this. “I have considered it. I did grow up as a High Lord’s son…”

“I know.” Tamlin’s voice was soft, “You weren’t considered the heir, though. This will be different.” Lucien nodded, realising that Tamlin knew what he was talking about not having grown up as the heir to the Spring Court until his brothers were dead and he had been forced into the role. “It’s worse.”

“I will keep that in mind.” He gave Tamlin a grateful smile before looking up when someone came to stand over him. 

“Well, I don’t think I’ve met the High Lord of the Spring Court.” Sorcha’s voice was melodic and sweet as she looked down at Lucien. “Would you introduce me?”


	133. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Three

**Chapter 133**

“So what are you going to do?” Nesta asked bluntly, and Elain raised an eyebrow at her sister. 

“What do you mean?”

“Well, Lucien is now the heir to the Day Court.” Nesta replied, her sharp eyes firmly on Elain’s. “He’s not going to return to the Night Court. Have you considered that yet?”

“Well…”

“You’re going to stay here with him, aren’t you?” Nesta’s voice was louder than it had been and Elain felt herself blush slightly when faeries turned to look.

“Nes…” She breathed. “No decision has been made.”

“But you would.”

“I…” Elain felt her heartbeat increase slightly, as heat flushed through her. “Lucien and I want to be together.” She told her sisters, and Feyre nodded while Nesta just looked at her. “The Night Court isn’t our home.”

“You’re welcome there…” Feyre said, “Did you not feel welcome?”

“I did.” Elain looked at Feyre, “It’s your home, though.” She went on, “You belong there… but it’s not my home. It’s not Lucien’s home.”

“You want somewhere of your own.”

“Somewhere for the both of us.” Elain said, “If that is here, then…” She looked at Nesta. “Do you understand?”

Nesta looked carefully at her, tilting her head slightly. “I don’t want you to just disappear into some random Court to never see you…”

“The Day Court shares a border with the Night Court, and I would never disappear on you.” Elain felt tears pricking at her eyes. She had never intended for Nesta to feel as if she was leaving her. “Wherever I am, you are always welcome to come and stay… for as long as you like, Nesta.”

“You need to be a part of the decision.” Nesta said, her voice clipped. “I hope you won’t just follow him…”

Elain looked at her sister, and nodded. “Lucien wouldn’t expect that of me.” She said, “He has always cared about what I want.”

“And what do you want?” Nesta reached a hand out, and Elain lifted her own hand to take it gently. Blinking back tears, she thought about what she wanted.

“I want a home, Nes.” She breathed, “I want a home; somewhere I belong, and I know that wherever that is, it is with Lucien. I want to be with him, and I want to be healthy and happy and…” she thought about what she had read about seers in the library. “I want to be whole and sane…” She saw Nesta’s eyes narrow at her, and she went on. “I want to see Lucien happy, and feeling as if he is contributing to something he feels matters, I want him to feel appreciated and wanted…”

“I want you to have that.” Nesta’s voice was a whisper now, and Elain felt tears welling in her eyes once again. She wanted to cry, and she held tightly to her sister’s hand, hoping that that connection would help her keep those tears inside. She hardly needed to draw further attention to herself in his hall with tears, not when Lucien had just been announced before the High Lords to be Helion’s son, and she was supposed to be happy. She was happy. 

Feeling a flash of anger down the bond, Elain turned her head, her eyes scanning the room for Lucien. He wasn’t where he had been standing with Helion the last time she had looked and, with faeries wandering around the place, she couldn’t see him at all. Hurt swirled down the bond to her next, and Elain frowned, getting to her feet.

“Elain?” Feyre asked, a frown on her own face. Shaking her head, Elain released Nesta’s hand. 

“Something’s wrong.” She murmured, craning her neck to try and see past a group of Courtiers. 

“What?” Nesta got up to stand beside her and Elain cast a simple glance at her sister before striding off across the hall. She could feel Nesta following her, at her back, but she didn’t stop until she spotted Lucien’s vibrant ruby hair. 

He was sitting on a couch beside Tamlin and, the instant she spotted him, his emotions slammed into her. Anger still swirled within him, as well as shame and hurt. As she watched, several courtiers approached him on the couch and Elain’s blood went cold when the blonde priestess she had met the other day slid into Lucien’s lap. Panic hit Elain down the bond then and she watched Lucien lift his hands, holding them away from the priestess as the courtiers began speaking to him. He didn’t know what to do, Elain could feel that as well as everything still washing over her from him. It mixed with everything that had already been warring within herself after her talk with her sisters, and Elain began to feel her control slip. 

Taking a step forward, she paused when Nesta’s hand came down on her shoulder. “Elain…” she heard the warning there, but Elain had no interest in heeding it. She glared over her shoulder at her sister, and Nesta retracted her hand, evidently reading something in her face that suggested that would be the best option. Free, Elain spun back around and strode across the hall toward her mate.

*

When Elain came around the side of the couch, Lucien looked up at her. His eyes caught on her face, at the feral look in her eyes, and his breath caught in his throat. Elain’s brown eyes were hard and fierce, and locked completely on Sorcha who was still sitting on him. He wasn’t entirely certain what game the priestess was playing at, but he was more than aware of the fact that she had used the approach of the courtiers as an excuse to seat herself in his lap under the guise of making room in the small space around the couch. 

He had thought for a moment that Sorcha had been about to turn her attentions on Tamlin when she had asked to be introduced but, as soon as those courtiers had approached, her attention had returned to him. 

“Lucien…” Elain’s voice held a note that he had never heard before, and something within him yearned to crawl across the floor to her feet. He wanted to reach out to her, roll on to his back at her feet and surrender himself to her. 

“Yes…” he lifted his eyes to meet her fierce gaze, and that desire only grew stronger. Elain took another step closer, and Sorcha made a high-pitched giggling sound as she slid out of his lap. 

“Oops.” The priestess laughed. “For a few moments, I’d forgotten where we were…”

Lucien ignored Sorcha, as did Elain. He held his mate’s gaze as she strode toward him, leaning over him for a moment before she kissed him. He was more than a little surprised as Elain had never been one for public displays of affection but then, he supposed, that was not what this was. Elain’s kiss was possessive, and he knew that it was entirely for the benefit of anyone whose eyes were on them, especially Sorcha. One of Elain’s hands slid into his hair as she leaned over him, and her other clenched tightly at his shoulder. When she lifted her head to meet his eyes once more, her hand tightened in his hair. 

“Come with me.” She growled, and he nodded, lifting himself to his feet without another thought. 

Faeries were already leaving the hall for the evening, and he noted that there were far fewer courtiers around than there had been earlier. It was this detail that led him to believe that hardly anybody would notice if he left with Elain now. A quick glance around the room told him that nobody was watching and he flicked a quick look at Helion who was still standing with his mother and Eris. Nobody would mind if he was gone and, judging by the storm of emotion that he could feel swirling within Elain down the bond as she held tightly to his arm, he didn’t suppose there would be any arguing with her.


	134. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Four

**Chapter 134**

Elain followed Lucien into the room they shared, and he headed straight for the window, opening it and letting a cool breeze in. When the breeze lifted the airy curtain, billowing it gently, Lucien turned back to look at his mate. Elain was standing inside the door, her dark eyes intent upon him. “Petal…?” He asked, and she took a hasty step toward him before catching herself and going still again. Lucien tilted his head. Carefully, he reached out with his mind, seeking the bond between them, wanting to know what was going on within her.

She was still watching him, her hands fisting handfuls of the lilac dress she wore, and Lucien took a small step toward her. “Petal…” he reached the bond, and a dozen emotions slammed into him. He recognised guilt and longing, and sadness and desire, but simmering on the surface were anger and jealousy and the look in those eyes told him exactly what was going on. “Elain…” he moved closer, wrapping her in his arms, and holding her to himself. Just like the night in Rhysand’s kitchen, which seemed like so long ago now, just like she had done for him, Lucien knew that walking toward her while she was being driven by the same thing that so often took a hold of him would be more useful than running away from it. “It’s the bond…” he breathed, pressing his cheek to the top of her head. “I know how it feels…” he felt her lean into him a little, and he turned his head to press his lips to her hair. “Don’t fight it.” She looked up at him then, and Lucien had only a moment to register the feral look in her eyes, before she leaped at him.

Catching her, Lucien slid his hands down to grip Elain’s thighs, hoisting her higher as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Her kiss was just as possessive as it had been in the hall in front of Sorcha and the others who had been watching, and he surrendered to it as he backed toward the bed, still holding her to himself.

Once on the bed, Elain had pushed him back as she moved over him, her lips moving across his cheek and down his throat as her hands roamed him less than gently. Lucien allowed his eyes to close, his hands moving slowly up and down her thighs, as she moved against him. 

“What…” she growled, her lips against his ear, “did that priestess think that she was doing…?”

Lucien opened his eyes, not able to see much with her golden brown hair in his face. “I…” he shook his head, “I don’t know…”

“She knows you’re _mine_ …” the final word was a snarl, and Lucien felt her hands tighten on him for a moment, and he nodded. Elain’s hands then went down between them, and began deftly unlacing his pants. “She knows…” She lifted herself as she worked his pants down a little, out of her way. “She knows…” 

“Yes…” his hands continued caressing her thighs, “She does.” When Elain began lifting her dress, shifting it up around her hips, he slid his hands further up her thighs, “They all know…” he told her, his breath catching when her eyes met his, just as feral as before. She held his gaze as she reached down to take hold of him, adjusting herself over him, and he knew he’d been hard since she had kissed him in the hall. 

Without so much as pausing, Elain lowered herself onto him, and Lucien let out a groan as he was sheathed completely inside of her. She had taken his hands from her then, lifting and pinning them by his head, gripping his wrists tightly. Lucien groaned again when she moved, and she was rougher than he had anticipated. He couldn’t help the string of expletives that fell from his lips, but the words died in his throat when he lifted his eyes to Elain’s face once more. The anger and jealousy were still there, simmering as possessive rage, and he could just about see fire behind the feral look in her eyes. He held her gaze, wanting to let her see that she had him, that he was hers. Small gasps began to come from Elain as she moved, and Lucien could have lifted his hands, even as she held them down, could have broken free to touch her as he liked, but he let her hold him where she wanted. Instead, he just watched her; watched as small curled tendrils of hair came free of her braids and cascaded down her neck, watched as she clenched her teeth in a snarl, her eyes closing as she growled. Surrendering to her, Lucien let his eyes move over Elain as she rode him. Hard. 

Before long the sounds that were coming from his mate changed, and her movements had become more rough, almost violent. Concerned, Lucien lifted his hands, Elain releasing him and allowing him to do so, and he grabbed her hips, trying to slow her. “You’ll hurt yourself.” He breathed, and she opened her dark eyes to look at him, “You can have all of me, Petal. You don’t have to hurt yourself to do it.”

“Am I hurting you?” her voice was rough, and she paused for a moment before he shook his head. 

“No…”

She leaned forward then, her hands bracing herself against his chest, as she began to move again. Lucien kept his hands on her hips, reaching for the bond again as he watched her face. Elain’s gasping sounds began to sound pained rather than pleasured, and Lucien began to quickly sort through everything that he could decipher through the bond connecting them.

*

Gasping, Elain allowed her hair to fall into her face as she leaned forward over Lucien. _Mine, Mine, Mine_ … Her hips continued to move in time to the chant in her head, matching itself to Lucien’s heartbeat which she could hear pounding loudly as his hands gripped her hips. Letting out a cry, she let one of her hands slide up to his throat as she lifted her eyes to his. He was watching her carefully, that metallic eye clicking as he focused on her face, and an instant later she felt a tug from her ribs. 

Gasping again, Elain realised that Lucien was pulling on the bond. “What are you doing?” she asked, trying to maintain her rhythm as she felt him tug again.

“What is it?” he asked, his voice thick, and Elain knew that he was asking what had pushed her to this, what was driving her. 

She tried to think of a response, her hips slowing, as she allowed one of her hands to gently trace Lucien’s skin, following the stretch of material across his chest. She didn’t know. Everything had sort of built up, from her initial discussion with Nesta and Feyre to whatever had happened to Lucien to make him angry and hurt, and then to top it all off, she had seen that priestess in his lap. All of it, mixed together, had awoken something within her, sparked something she had had no control over. 

Leaning forward further, Elain slid her hands up Lucien’s chest to his face, stroking him gently as she pressed her chest to his. “I… I don’t…” she shook her head as it all washed over her and she closed her eyes, pressing her face into Lucien’s neck as she began to cry.

“No… Petal…” his voice was warm, soothing, as one of his large hands moved up the back of her neck and into her hair. His other hand moved gently over her back as he murmured to her. “It’s okay. Whatever it is, whatever happened…” he was quiet for a moment, “You know that Sorcha is of no interest to me…”

“I know.” She breathed, her breath hitching, “It’s not her… It’s all of it. She won’t be the only one, they’re all going to be like that. You’re going to have to put up with so much of it … and Nesta thinks I’m going to abandon her…” a sob escaped her and Lucien’s hand began making gentle circles on her back. “And I don’t know what to do about any of it… I don’t know…” She lifted her head to look at him again, “All that I could think was that you are mine… and… I want you.”

Lucien smiled gently at her, his fingers brushing her cheek. “I know what it feels like when it grips you like that.” He told her, and Elain remembered the morning she and Lucien had first left the Night Court. Feyre had come to speak to her in her room and had talked to her about this same thing. She had told Elain that there was no fighting it when it took hold, and Elain had thought about how Lucien had fought it for her that night in the kitchen. Evidently, Elain did not have that same impressive level of self-control. “I love you…” he breathed, and Elain pressed her nose to his cheek. “Are you alright?” he asked, “Did you hurt yourself?”

She could feel a dull ache between her thighs, but Elain shook her head. “I’m okay.” She breathed, “I…” she let her fingers trace his jaw, “I…”

When Lucien’s hands slid down her body, taking the lilac dress to her waist, before his grip on her tightened, Elain knew that he’d figured out what she wanted. He gently rolled her beneath himself, hands coming back up to caress her as his lips met hers in a soft kiss, and Elain held tightly to him when he slid carefully between her thighs once more. 

Lucien moved slowly, deliberately, and Elain let him caress her with his hands and his mouth as he did so. Heat flared inside of her again as she clung to him, groaning. When she felt her heartbeat match Lucien’s, Elain closed her eyes, murmuring his name softly. This was what made her feel better, this was what she wanted, and she would have to remember this for next time the bond decided to throw her at him.


	135. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Five

**Chapter 135**

It was still dark when Elain awoke. Lifting her head, she could see Lucien asleep beside her, his vibrant hair splayed out across the pillow and the sheet wrapped low around his waist. She let herself reach out to touch him gently as she pushed herself into a sitting position, and she smiled when she thought about the way her had held her in his arms earlier. Everything had been swirling around inside of her, and the only thing that had made it stop had been Lucien. Despite the way she had come at him, he had been patient and gentle and, in the end, she had writhed beneath him, shrieking his name as he had held her tenderly. 

Knowing what she wanted, Elain stretched over to press a soft kiss to Lucien’s cheek before she slipped out of the bed. Bending to pick up her dress, she pulled it over her head before heading quickly for the door. 

She hadn’t been to Helion’s rooms before, but she knew where they were thanks to her many walks around the palace with Ashk. The hallways were deserted and she didn’t see anyone as she slipped quietly through them and, by the time she came to Helion’s door, she was trying to keep her mind distracted from what she was about to do. 

Swallowing thickly, Elain knocked on the large golden door that she knew led to Helion’s private suite. There was no sound within and she knocked again. Perhaps he hadn’t heard her, as it was the middle of the night. Elain began to wonder if she should have waited for morning, but then she heard a shuffling from the other side of the door and then a low click before the door was pulled open. 

Helion stood in the doorway, hair messed and a rather tiny sheer golden robe wrapped carelessly around his very magnificent body. Elain couldn’t stop her eyes moving over him before she tried to swallow again as she forced herself to look back up to meet his eyes. “Elain…?” The High Lord gave her a bit of a smirk, “I hadn’t thought I would see you again tonight. Not after the way that you dragged Lucien out of that hall…”

“I… sorry…” Elain tried to clear her throat. “I…” she broke off when a flash of red hair moved across her field of vision behind Helion. Ashk. Elain felt herself blush, and wondered if Lucien knew that his mother was spending her nights in Helion’s rooms. “Oh… I…” she twisted her hands together, “I shouldn’t have…”

“You wouldn’t have come if it wasn’t important, Elain.” Helion said, his smile still firmly in place. “What can I do for you?”

“I want to accept the bond between Lucien and I.” she said quickly. 

“…Good…” He nodded, amber eyes still on her. 

“Here.” She said. “As soon as possible.”

Leaning against the door frame, Helion’s eyes slid over Elain and she felt as if he were looking right through her. “Do you intend to do it tonight?”

“No…” She blinked, taking a step back.

“Then, if you can give me a day or so to make some arrangements, that should be fine.”

“Arrangement?” she asked, “Like what?”

“I would think the very arrangements you considered when you decided to come and tell me of your intention.” He said.

“I… thought it would be rude to do it without warning.” She told him, “Dangerous, even… I have heard that if someone gets too close things can get violent.”

“Yes.” Helion said, nodding simply, “So, I will have a self-contained suite set up for you and Lucien that will have everything you will need for as long as your frenzy lasts. You will not need to come out or see anyone… Until it is over.”

“Oh… I… Thank you.”

“Of course.”

Elain watched Helion’s eyes move over her again, and she began to feel a little self-conscious. When the High Lord took a slow, deep breath, she knew that he was scenting her, and she wished that she had thought to wash herself before she had come out into the halls. “Does Lucien know that you’re here?”

“No… He’s… asleep…”

Amber eyes moved over her once more. “You should return to him.”

Elain nodded, taking a further step back. She caught another glimpse of Ashk’s hair behind Helion and she smiled. “Thank you. Yes. I will… thank you…” Before she could say anything else, Elain turned on her heel and hurried back to where Lucien was still asleep and unaware that she had even left. 

He had only moved a little since she had gotten out of bed, and Elain slipped her dress off, dropping it to the floor. Lucien had turned on his side, toward where she had been, and one of his hands was stretched out as if searching for her. As she slid under the covers again, Elain took that hand in hers, linking her fingers through his, and pressing it against her chest as she settled on her back. 

“Petal…” Lucien’s voice was sleep-thick and mumbled, and his fingers gently stroked her chest, sliding up and across her collarbone.

“Yes…” Turning her head to look at him, Elain smiled when she met his eyes

“Where’d you go?” he asked, shifting closer and pulling her against himself. He was warm, and she hadn’t noticed until that moment how much chillier the hallway had been. 

“Nowhere…” she let one of her own hands slide down his muscled forearm, enjoying those firm corded muscles beneath her fingers. 

“You did.” He nuzzled against her, his nose pressed to her throat, “You were gone…” Elain felt his hot lips against her skin before he suddenly stiffened, “You smell like…” he lifted his head to look at her face. “…like… Helion.”

Elain raised an eyebrow at him. “You can smell that?”

“Yes. Why do you smell like Helion?” Lucien had pushed himself up onto an elbow and was staring directly at her. Elain tilted her head as she met his eyes, wondering what it was that he was thinking. 

“I had to talk to him.”

“About what?” he frowned, his eyes moving back and forth across her face, and Elain lifted a hand to his cheek, her fingers ghosting over his scar.

“Are you jealous?” she asked softly, and Lucien’s hands tightened on her, one at her waist and the other wrapped around one of her upper arms. 

“I’m trying very hard not to be.”

“Aw.” She could hear the restraint in his voice, and she smiled up at him, sliding her fingers from his cheek into his hair. “Don’t be jealous.” She murmured, “I told him that I want to accept the bond here… and he’s going to organise somewhere for us.”

Lucien’s expression softened and Elain slowly carded her fingers through his hair. “You told him that?”

“Yes.” She drew him down a little until she could lift her head to press her lips to his forehead, “I thought he should know.” She smiled as she rested back against the pillow again. “They all should know.”

“Well, considering the way you dragged me out of that hall earlier, I think they all do know.” Lucien’s smirk made Elain blush and she winced slightly.

“Yes, well.” She ran one of her hands down his back, “As long as you’re no longer jealous. Also, did you know that your mother is currently in the High Lord’s room?”

Lucien smiled at her. “Is she?”

“She is.” Elain watched as Lucien’s smile grew even wider. 

“Good for her.” He gave a soft laugh. 

“Indeed.” Elain agreed.

“Oh?” Lucien asked, his voice teasing. “You think she has done well?”

“Do you want me to tell you how handsome Helion is?” Elain asked, teasing him back. 

“No…” Lucien’s hands moved back up over her skin, making her shiver. 

“Is that because you know how handsome he is?” Elain asked, grinning at him. 

“I do have eyes.” Lucien replied, “Even if only one of them is real…”

“Interesting…” She shifted closer to him, tucking her head up under his chin, and pressed her lips to his throat. “Mmm… you are warm…”

“I haven’t been wandering the hallways.” He replied, his hands pressed to her back, holding her firmly. “I was waiting for you to come back.”

“Well, I’m here now.” Elain smiled, her lips still against his throat. She licked carefully at him, at the spot through which she could feel his pulse, and Lucien groaned softly. “You like that?” she murmured, and felt him nod in response. “Do you like this…?” She closed her lips around that pulse point as she slid one of her hands lower, wrapping gently around him. Lucien gave a soft gasp as she began to slowly move that hand, working him carefully, pleased when she felt him grow hard beneath her ministrations. When she felt him move as if to roll her beneath himself, she stopped him. “No…” she murmured, licking at his throat again, “Let me do this…” Slowly, she began stroking him again, listening to the soft sounds her actions drew from him. She liked the way that she could hear his breath catch and the way that his grip on her tightened. She liked the small groans that he made into her ear, and she liked that she was able to do all of that to him. Listening to him, Elain continued what she had been doing, moving more and more quickly, letting his reactions guide her, all the while focusing her lips and teeth on that pulse point at his throat. It didn’t take all that long before she felt him shudder and one of his hands moved down her thigh. 

“Ah… I… I want to do it inside you…” he groaned, and Elain nodded, letting him draw her thigh up to hook around his waist. He had only just pushed into her when Elain felt him shudder again, as he gave a loud cry, one of his hands fisting tightly in her hair. “Oh…” he gave a small sigh, and Elain smiled, running one of her own hands up and down his chest, listening to his heartbeat in her head as it began to slow and return to normal. “That was…” he still sounded slightly breathless, “That was…”

“Yeah…” Elain nodded, tucking her head up under his chin again as she settled comfortably against him, “Good…” she breathed. Closing her eyes, she continued to listen to Lucien’s heartbeat, as he ran his large hands soothingly over her moving slowly from the base of her spine up to her shoulders and back down again. Over and over, she followed the passage of his hand with her mind and she sank closer and closer toward sleep.


	136. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Six

**Chapter 136**

Crossing his ankle across his knee, Lucien leaned back in his chair and watched the High Lords around the table. There had been significantly less arguing than he had expected, and less than he had remembered from pervious meetings between the High Lords. It was evident that each of them was trying to be as agreeable as possible because they all wanted this to succeed, but that had ended up meaning that nobody was really sharing their true opinions, or venturing suggestions that they feared may be shot down. That meant that nothing was really progressing further than Helion and Eris had initially planned.

When he gave a light sigh of annoyance, running a hand though his ruby hair, Kallias looked his way. “What’s the matter, Lucien?” the High Lord of the Winter Court asked, a smirk spreading across his pale face, “Tired after last night?”

Lucien tilted his head, eyeing Kallias and raising an eyebrow. He heard the soft chuckle from Tarquin, and he turned his eyes on the other High Lords, all of whom were now looking at him, and all of whom seemed amused. He’d known they had all witnessed Elain practically drag him out of the hall the previous night, he just hadn’t expected any of them to actually make mention of it. 

“You know how it is.” Lucien eventually replied, “When your mate demands something of you…” Only Rhys, Kallias and Thesan smiled knowingly in response, and Feyre lay a hand atop one of Rhys’.

“I feel like it’s like that when any female demands that of me…” Tarquin muttered, and Helion nodded his agreement. Eris’ expression suggested that if anybody dared demand anything of him, they would not have a pleasant evening at all. “Nevertheless…” Tarquin added, “if Lucien is tired, maybe this is a sign we should take a break.”

“I’m not tired.” Lucien replied, “Perhaps the task should be broken up, however.”

“What do you mean?” Helion asked, leaning back in his own chair. Lucien was reminded of the conversation he had had with Elain the previous night, and he thought about his mother spending the night in Helion’s rooms. He also remembered that Elain had told the High Lord that she wanted to accept the bond as soon as possible.

“Instead of going over the outline over and over, maybe each aspect of the organisation could be allocated to someone.”

“How would we keep everyone accountable?” Eris asked, running a hand over his own face. Lucien eyed him. 

“It would be fairly obvious if someone wasn’t doing their job.”

“We could,” Kallias put in gently, “allocate the planning of it. Break it up this afternoon and meet again tomorrow to present what we have.”

“Sounds good to me.” Rhys agreed, pushing back from the table and turning toward Feyre who nodded. 

“Yes.” She said softly, “What would you like us to consider?”

The High Lords looked from one to another, and Lucien followed their gazes until they landed on him. “What?” he asked. 

“You’re the one who has most recently been though all of the Courts.” Rhys said, “Perhaps you would have some insight on what each Court might oversee best.”

“Not particularly.” Lucien leaned forward and began writing various aspects of the project on small pieces of paper before passing them around the table.

“You want me drafting the actual route that it would take through Prythian?” Tamlin asked, his tone incredulous. 

“Yours is the most southern Court.” Lucien replied, “It has to go through all the others to get there and then, if it is to continue to the Mortal Lands, the Spring Court will be that connection point…”

Tamlin made a sound low in his throat and pushed himself to his feet. “I will need a map.”

“I will have one sent to your room.” Helion got to his own feet, looking at the slip of paper in his own hand. Amber eyes lifted to Lucien. “Looks like I will be visiting the library in the North.”

Smiling, Lucien nodded. He knew that Helion was inviting him to join him in his visit to the library. Lucien had been intending to visit that library himself to learn what he could about Seers who didn’t get lost in insanity, and he would very much like to do that with his father if that were possible. 

“Security…” Kallias mused, leaning back in his chair and steepling his long fingers as he appeared to think deeply. 

“You do have those bears…” Thesan said with a smile. 

“True…” Kallias nodded, returning the smile.

“Your borders are extremely well protected.” Lucien put in.

“Viv does organise the border patrols excellently.”

“Perhaps ask her for help.” Lucien grinned at Kallias who gave a half shrug. 

“I won’t need to ask.”

“We will discuss this further at dinner.” Helion said, “And we will set a time for tomorrow back here.”

As the High Lord of the Day Court strode out into the hallway, Lucien followed him. “Are you going now?” he asked, and Helion glanced around at him.

“Does that suit you?”

“Yes…” Lucien nodded, his heartbeat increasing. “That would be… Yes…”

*

“What, Nes?” Elain asked, flipping the pages of her little notebook. She sat in a comfortable couch in one of the Day Court sitting rooms, stretched out in the sun which was streaming through the window and spilling warm golden light across the room. 

“Nothing.” Nesta murmured, eyes still on Elain. “Just trying to work out how much you’ve changed.”

“How much…” Elain set her book aside and looked up at her sister. “You think I have changed?”

“It’s clear you have.”

“How so?”

“In so many ways.” Nesta said, “Let’s start with how you actually abandoned Feyre and I last night to drag Lucien off to your bedroom and…” Her sister broke off and rolled her eyes. Elain crossed one ankle over the other as she folded her arms, watching Nesta. 

“Okay.” She said after several moments of silence. “Do I need to explain to you what happened, or are you happy making assumptions?”

Nesta waved her hand extravagantly. “Go right ahead.”

“I had no control over what I did last night.”

“That’s a poor excuse.”

Narrowing her eyes, Elain went on. “How would you have felt?” she asked, “If some little piece of… some priestess… had thrown herself all over Cassian’s lap in the middle of a public dinner?” She hadn’t known for certain that her own assumption would hit its mark as she and Nesta had not discussed Cassian lately, or at all, but her sister’s lip curled in a sneer. “You would not have just let it go unchecked or unchallenged.” Elain added and the look in Nesta’s eyes then told her that was the truth. “Even if it hadn’t sparked whatever possessiveness that was in me, I would not have allowed that to go on. It wasn’t decent, and it wasn’t fair to Lucien, especially after that horrid Ianthe person.”

“The one who sold us out?” Nesta’s voice was close to a growl, and Elain nodded. 

“I wanted to protect him from that situation.” She went on, “And I… couldn’t … help… what the bond was pushing for me to do…I had to… claim… him…” She looked at Nesta closely, “Do you understand?” she asked, “I did not just decide that I wanted to … to… “ she made a vague gesture with her hands, and saw Nesta’s supressed smile. 

“You didn’t just decide that you wanted to fuck?” her sister asked innocently, and Elain made a face at the crude language. 

“You sound like Feyre.”

“I’ve spent a lot of time with Feyre lately.”

“Is that another pointed comment about how I have been away?”

“Perhaps.”

Elain sighed and leaned back against the couch in the sun. “Well, then.” She murmured, “Catch me up on what has been happening at the Night Court while I have been gone.” She slanted a glance at her sister’s face. “What has Cassian been up to? Any juicy details to tell me?” Nesta made an uncharacteristic squeak of a sound, and Elain grinned widely.


	137. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Seven

**Chapter 137**

When Feyre walked in, Elain was laughing and Nesta was folding her arms and doing her best to try to look annoyed. If Elain hadn’t have known her sister as well as she did, she would have definitely stopped asking about Cassian long before this moment. She did know Nesta, however, and this had pushed her into continuing her line of questioning.

“It’s not funny!” Nesta huffed as Feyre approached them. 

“What’s not funny?” Their youngest sister threw herself down on the couch beside Nesta and began lounging casually. 

“Nes is telling me all about Cassian.” Elain said helpfully. 

“How could she tell you all?” Feyre smirked, “They haven’t even fucked yet.”

“Feyre!” Elain gasped while Nesta’s mouth dropped open and her eyes narrowed. 

“Do you _mind_?” She all but hissed at Feyre who shrugged.

“Not as much as I am sure Cassian does.” Feyre brought her feet up to sling them over the side of the couch.

“Could we try being respectful?” Elain asked.

“As if you weren’t just interrogating her.” Feyre replied, still smirking.

“I was being supportive about it.” Elain said, smoothing her dress over her legs. “Just trying to catch up on what I have missed.”

“You’ve not missed much.” Feyre told her. “They just sneak around when they think nobody can see them.” 

“ _Excuse me_.” Nesta sniffed. “Don’t pretend like I’m not here.”

Elain grinned and watched her sisters bicker back and forth. Unlike there had used to be, there was no actual heat behind the words, and nothing but affection in the way they looked at one another. Five years ago she never would have dreamed this was where they would end up. 

“Even Elain thinks so!” Feyre’s voice caught Elain’s attention and she blinked. 

“What do I think?” she asked.

“That Nesta and Cassian need to just…”

“Whoa, okay.” Elain held up a hand when Feyre looked as if she were going to try and finish the rest of her sentence with select hand gestures. “They need to do whatever it is that they want to do.” She laughed and stretched out again in the sun. “Don’t rush them. That won’t help.”

“Well, look at you.” Feyre grinned, “Talking like you’re an expert…”

“Well, I mean…” Elain gave her a self-satisfied smile, “I have managed something pretty perfect.” She watched the way that both Feyre and Nesta’s faces lit up with smiles before Nesta looked more closely at her. 

“Lucien’s letter to Rhys said that he thought you would need to talk to us. Something about your seer ability?” Her elder sister’s voice was serious, if a little concerned. 

“Oh…” Elain sat up a little straighter. “It’s… We did some research in one of the libraries. Every account that we found of the lives of well-known seers seemed to end with them becoming rather unstable.”

“In the mind?” Feyre asked, and Elain nodded, her eyes still on Nesta whose own features had turned sharper. 

“Are you suggesting that the abilities the Cauldron gave you are going to make you go crazy?”

“No, well… yes… but…” Drawing a slow breath, Elain pushed her hair back from her face. “Lucien was talking about needing an anchor. He thinks that the bond between us will work to enable me to have something to hold on to… so I won’t get lost…”

“Will that work?” Nesta turned to Feyre, “We should have brought Amren.”

“I don’t think we need Amren.” Elain said softly, “The Day Court has the biggest and most extensive libraries in Prythian. Ancient knowledge is right here… and Helion knows a lot…”

“What does he say?” Nesta’s voice was no-nonsense now and Elain gave a half shrug. 

“Things have been rather busy. I’ve not asked him.”

“Elain, this should be your priority.” Nesta leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. “We need a plan to make sure this doesn’t happen.”

“We have one.” Elain said. “The bond…”

“Is a guess.” Nesta said, “We can’t afford to guess.”

“It doesn’t matter.” A voice from the doorway said, annoyingly cheery. “All the others ended the same way.” Elain resisted an audible sigh as Sorcha strode across the room toward them. “I read all about them when I was doing my training. Each one was lost to madness.”

“That won’t happen to me.” Elain adjusted herself on the couch, trying to hide her irritation.

“Oh, but it will.” The priestess’ bright eyes focused on her, her expression one of mock sadness, “And then what will happen to the future High Lord?”

“He’s not your concern.” Surprised at the venom in her own voice, Elain tried to keep her face serene. 

“Yes, he is.” Sorcha perched on the armrest of one of the vacant chairs. “As a priestess here, it is my duty to take care of all of his… needs.”

Clenching the armrests of her own chair, Elain stared at the blonde faerie. “You need to stay away from my mate.” She said carefully. “You can’t have him.”

Sorcha just smiled at her sweetly. “Why don’t you use your little ability and take a look if you can _see_ how that will turn out?” Brushing her long golden hair over her shoulder, she added, “Using the ability hastens the process, did you know?”

“I don’t know what you think your role is…” Elain said, working hard to unclench her teeth, “But you might want to recheck it.”

“I know exactly what my role is.” 

“It’s not being a tramp.” Nesta muttered, rolling her eyes. “Nor is it to try and fuck your way to power.”

Elain’s eyes widened as she glanced at her elder sister, before looking back to Sorcha who was laughing. “My role is to take care of the Court… and the best way to do that is to ensure that the High Lord has everything he needs.”

“Is it?” Feyre asked mildly, “Why don’t you go out into the city, or back to one of your temples and actually talk to the faeries who live here? See what they need?” Sorcha made a snorting noise that may have been a laugh. “No? Didn’t think so…”

“No, I worked hard to get my place in the palace.” Sorcha’s sickeningly sweet smile was firmly in place once more.

“On your back or your knees?” Nesta asked scathingly.

Sorcha’s smile dropped and she met Nesta’s eyes with her chin high. “Whatever Helion preferred.”

Elain sat back slowly, not knowing what to say to that. She looked from Nesta to Feyre and back again. Both of her sisters were shaking their heads, but it was Feyre who spoke first. “So you’ve got a taste for High Lords now?”

Sorcha raised an eyebrow, and let out a sigh. “They’re all the same, I’ll bet.” She stretched in an exaggerated manner, “You’ve been through two of them…” Blue eyes turned on Feyre, “Tamlin and Rhysand…” She smirked, and Elain noticed Nesta’s hand come down on Feyre’s shoulder to keep her in place “Ashk has too…” Sorcha’s smirk widened “Whatever similarities they all have, I’ll bet there are more between father and son…”

“You go anywhere near Lucien, and you will regret it.” Elain could feel her temper rising, and she wasn’t entirely sure how she was going to control it.

“Doubtful.”

“You must not have to be very intelligent to be a priestess…” Nesta sounded thoughtful. “Do you know who you are talking to?” Sorcha flicked her hair over her shoulder again, giving Nesta a dismissive glance. “Feyre is the High Lady of the Night Court.”

“You have no power here.”

“Hm.” Feyre tilted her head, “But Elain does, as the mate of the High Lord’s son.”

Sorcha’s dismissive look moved across Elain. “Only until she loses her mind… and then Lucien needs-”

“-if you make any kind of assumption about what Lucien needs, I will…” Elain clenched her teeth, not sure what she would do. She looked at Nesta to see her sister frowning at the priestess.

“I don’t remember inviting you into this conversation. My sisters and I were talking with one another.” Nesta got to her feet, her eyes narrowing. Sorcha looked unphased, and Elain wondered how the priestess could feel so confident. Did the blonde know something that gave her some kind of leverage or ensure her security? Perhaps she thought the fact that she had slept with Helion made her untouchable? Perhaps it did. “Stay away from my sister and her mate.” Nesta’s voice was low and if Elain had have been Sorcha, she would have wet herself and run away. 

“No promises.” Sorcha bounced to her feet, smiling at them all. 

Elain watched with disbelief as the priestess flounced across to the door and disappeared out into the hallway. When she looked back to her sisters, she found both Feyre and Nesta’s eyes already on her. 

“She is unbelievable.” Feyre murmured, “The audacity…”

“She kind of scares me.” Elain murmured, and Nesta nodded her head. 

“If you’re going to stay here,” Her elder sister said, “She needs to go.”

“Go where?” Elain murmured, “Unless she takes a liking to some other High Lord and decides to follow him home…”

“Maybe you can offload her on Eris.” Feyre snickered and Elain saw Nesta grin at the idea for a moment.

“Who knows?” Elain shrugged, “I don’t care where she goes, as long as it’s not near Lucien.”


	138. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Eight

**Chapter 138**

The sun was on its way to setting, and Feyre had gone off in search of Rhys, when Nesta had seized Elain by the arm and dragged her down yet another hallway. At first Elain had been surprised but, as she struggled to keep up with her sister’s long strides, she grew irritated at being hauled around like a child. “Nesta!” she exclaimed, exasperated. “Where are we going?”

Her sister looked over her shoulder at her and Elain wrenched her arm free from the iron grip with which she was being held. “To find Helion.”

“What?” Elain rubbed at her arm, hoping that she wouldn’t bruise. “I was going to see if Lucien was back. I haven’t seen him since before the High Lords’ meeting this morning.”

“I’m sure we will be waiting after we’re done with Helion.” Nesta said. “I want to ask him about your Seer abilities.”

“You want to ask him if he thinks I’ll go mad.”

“Not in those words.” Nesta frowned, taking Elain’s hand. “Come on… it won’t take long. Please.”

Sighing, Elain cast a longing glance back up the hallway toward the room she shared with Lucien before nodding and allowing Nesta to continue pulling her up the hallway. “Alright…”

They found Helion in one of his private study rooms, reclining in a comfortable looking armchair and lifting a small goblet of golden liquid to his lips. “Ahh… two of the Archeron sisters.” He raised his goblet to them in a small gesture of greeting before downing half of its contents. 

“We want to ask you some questions.” Nesta said, as blunt as ever. Helion raised an eyebrow and Elain bit back a sigh. 

“If… that’s alright.” She said, hoping to make up for some of Nesta’s harshness. 

“Of course.” Helion smiled almost indulgently. “I always have time for you.”

Casting a sideling look at her sister, Elain edged closer as Nesta placed her hands on her hips. “It’s about Elain being a Seer.” Nesta said, “What do you know about the others losing their minds?”

Helion nodded slowly, his amber eyes turning serious as he looked at Nesta. “The same that Lucien and Elain discovered in their initial research. Many of the well-known seers lose themselves in their visions.”

Nesta made a frustrated noise and clenched a handful of her dress. “And?” she pressed, “What does that mean for Elain?”

Leaning forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his knees, Helion turned his voice gentle. “It is not the fate of all seers.” He told them both, his eyes still on Nesta. “I would think that more of the well-known seers experience this fate as they use their abilities more frequently, and in a much more extensive way, than others. This speeds up the unfortunate…” he made an odd gesture with his hands, “consequences…”

“And Elain?” Nesta asked again, “How to we prevent it happening to her? She just doesn’t use her sight?”

“I don’t think she has that kind of control.” Helion said, glancing at Elain who nodded her confirmation.

“I can’t help it sometimes.” She agreed.

“Then what?” Nesta asked, “Lucien’s idea with the bond? Is it… legitimate?”

“Yes.” Helion said, his tone reassuring now. “He has done further research…” he looked at Elain who felt a flush of warmth spread through her, a spark of hope flaring again. “I’m certain he will tell you all about it when you see him.”

“Really?” Elain asked, “…and he found more about his idea?”

“Yes.” Helion nodded, his eyes flicking between Elain and Nesta, “Remember, Elain…” he smiled gently at her, “When the Cauldron gave you the gift of sight, it also gave you Lucien to keep you safe. It did not give you that gift only to destroy you. It also provided you with someone who would instinctively know how to protect you, and who would do what it took to save you.”

“My mate…” she murmured and Helion nodded. 

“He not only loves you.” He told her, “But his instinct on how to help you was exactly correct. Today he found accounts of seers whose bonds with their mates did help anchor them. They lived full, long, lives.”

“So if the Cauldron had have made Elain a seer, but she never found Lucien…” Nesta frowned deeply, her pale eyes sliding from Helion to meet Elain’s own gaze. 

“She likely would have had nothing to anchor herself to…”

“So any seer without a mate…?” Nesta shook her head. “That’s horrible.”

“Not entirely.” Helion said, “It was more likely for those without a mate to succumb to…” he frowned, “But it didn’t happen to all of them.”

Nesta appeared to shake herself, “So… Lucien knows what he has to do to use himself as an anchor?”

Helion smiled. “He’s looking into it.” He replied, “But, again, his instinct… is not to be overlooked.”

“Instinct.” Nesta huffed, evidently not having much respect or trust in the idea.

“You need to remember, Nesta…” Helion smiled, leaning back in his chair again and lifting his goblet for a sip. “He was _meant_ to do this.”

“Instinct and fate.” Nesta muttered, running a hand over her face. “That’s what you expect me to trust?”

“You sister seems to.”

“She trusts Lucien.” Nesta said, flicking a glance Elain’s way before returning her steely gaze to Helion. 

“Maybe you should trust her.” Helion smiled again. 

Nesta made a face and Elain took a step toward her, understating why her sister was so frustrated. “Nes.” She said, taking her sister’s hand. “Think about it.” She breathed, “The cauldron gave me this gift, and Lucien to help me with it. It knew what it was doing. He instinctually knew what to do to help me, and that turned out to be exactly what others have done in the past with success… It’s all happening as it should.”

Nesta let out a deep breath, meeting her eyes with a searching look. “Okay.” Elain could hear the resignation in her sister’s reply, and something eased in her. Nesta’s back straightened again then and her elder sister turned toward Helion once more. “That priestess always flouncing about the palace… The blonde one…”

“Sorcha?” Helion asked, raising an eyebrow at he looked at them.

“That’s her.” Nesta sniffed, “Are you aware that she has aspirations to…”

Elain tried to hide a smile when Nesta appeared to flounder for words. 

“Sorcha’s first priority is to the betterment of the Court.” Helion said.

“Is it, though?” Nesta asked, “You should probably take a closer look at her behaviour.”

“I shall keep that in mind.” Helion said, and his tone suggested that he was through with this conversation. Elain grabbed Nesta’s hand once again and began tugging her toward the door. 

“Thank you.” She said, inclining her head toward Helion, and squeezing her sister’s hand until she did the same. 

Once out in the hallway, Elain turned her eyes on Nesta again “Did you just tell Helion what to do?”

“Someone needed to bring that tramp to his attention.”

“Did it have to be you?”

“Wasn’t going to be you, was it?” Nesta sighed, “What if she did something to Lucien tonight, or tomorrow… and you hadn’t said anything to Helion?”

Letting out a huff, Elain nodded. “Surely he knows what she’s like…”

“Doesn’t seem like it.”

Elain let her mind go over the conversation they had just had with Helion, and the earlier conversation that Sorcha had interjected herself into. As they approached the door to her rooms, she smiled when she remembered that Lucien had apparently done more research and had some things to talk to her about. “I’ll see you for dinner in a little while.” She said to Nesta. Her sister gave her a smile and a nod, and headed for her own room. Still smiling to herself, Elain opened the door to her room and went inside.


	139. Chapter One Hundred and Thirty-Nine

**Chapter 139**

Information wasn’t the only thing Lucien had brought back from his trip into the city that afternoon. Elian’s face hurt from the huge smile that had been plastered across it as he had sat her down at a small table and opened a paper package that he’d set in front of her. “I’ve missed our days out in the garden.” He said, smiling warmly at her, and Elain felt her heart flutter in response. “Where we would just sit and talk… and then you would tell me what manual labour you wanted from me, just so that I would take my shirt off and you could ogle me…”

“No…” She laughed, bringing a hand up to her mouth to try and hide the smile. That hadn’t been true, at least, not at first. “But, I miss those days too.” She said. Those mornings where Lucien would bring her some form of pastry or other goods from her favourite bakery sat fondly in her memory. That had been how she had properly gotten to know him and, she suspected, when she had begun to fall in love with him. “Oh…”

“Looks delicious, doesn’t it?” Lucien pressed the paper packaging open as widely as he was able, and Elain stared down at the delicious looking cake.

“Very much.” Her eyes moved over the honey glazing and she nodded, wetting her lips with the tip of her tongue. “Dinner is in less than an hour…”

“I won’t tell anyone if you don’t.” He was grinning at her when she lifted her eyes to his face, and she nodded again, grinning right back at him. “Here we go, then.” He quickly set about sectioning the cake out, and passed Elain a piece. She took it and sat back in her chair, pulling pieces off and lifting them to her lips. She watched Lucien do much the same thing, a secretive smile still firmly in place across his features.

“You look like you expect to be reprimanded for ruining your dinner.” She said, laughter just behind her voice. 

“My mother will be present.” He reminded her, giving her a conspiratorial wink. Elain grinned again. 

“Ah, yes.” She put another piece of cake into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. “I hear you discovered some interesting things today…?”

“I went to one of the libraries in the north with Helion.” He told her, finishing his own piece of cake, and dusting his hands off. “He told me that I would find some information there that was different to the other stories we found.”

“And you did.”

“I did.” He nodded, his smile turning brighter as he looked at her, “It’s as we thought.” His voice turned gentle, “You need an anchor. Others have done it and it has worked.”

“The bond…”

“Yes.” He reached across the table, and Elain took his hand in hers. “It seems fairly simple. Once properly accepted,” he smiled at her when she felt herself blush, “I don’t think it would take more than five minutes…” his thumb trailed carefully back and forth across her knuckles, and she smiled at him. “I brought a couple of the books, if you would be interested in some of the personal accounts of seers who lived for centuries without any kind of sign they were losing themselves to their visions…” 

“Yes, I would.” She nodded, “Thank you.”

*

Much of the talk at dinner was about the progress many of the High Lords had made on their allocated aspect of the organisation of the trade routes, and Lucien struggled to keep his mind on the topic of conversation. He kept thinking about what he had read at the library. What he had told Elain had been true. Many of the seers who had anchored themselves to their mates through the bond had lived such long and happy lives. If he could do as they had done, then he would be able to ensure that kind of future for Elain. Lucien had hoped for some kind of instruction, but he had found none. He would continue to look, however. There were many other libraries he had yet to visit and, he supposed, he couldn’t do anything about it until she accepted the bond between them anyway. He still had time.

As dinner came to a close, Helion announced that the meeting for the High Lords tomorrow would be at the same time again, and then everyone present broke off into smaller groups, lounging around on couches and talking about all manner of topics. Lucien saw Elain cloistered in a corner with her sisters, and he figured that all three of them would like to hear some of the accounts of seers who successfully anchored themselves to their mates. Finishing his drink, he got to his feet and went to collect one of the books he had brought back from the library for Elain. 

As he headed for the dining hall once again, the book tucked under his arm, Lucien wondered which of the stories that Elain and her sisters would find most reassuring. His mate had told him that Nesta had been particularly disturbed, even to the point of seeking out Helion to demand answers, and he figured that if he chose the right account, he might be able to ease the worry in all of them. 

He did not expect Sorcha to step out in front of him in the middle of the hallway. “Oh!” he skid to a halt while the priestess smiled up at him. 

“Lucien…”

“Sorcha…?” he went to step to the side to continue on his way but she moved in front of him again, lifting her hands to his shoulders and pressing him toward a nearby window ledge. 

“What… what?” Lucien’s back hit the wall and he blinked. 

“Out here wandering on your own?” She asked, still smiling up at him, “Where’s Elain?”

“With her sisters…”

“Oh…” her bright eyes ran over him and Lucien shuddered when she slid her hands down his chest. “How could she just leave you all on your own? Somebody has to take care of you…” Sorcha’s voice was now a mere purr and Lucien lifted a hand to gently push her back.

“I’m fine.”

“You are.” She agreed, grinning again as she ran her hands over him, and Lucien recoiled as she sank down on her knees before him. 

“What are you… no… don’t…” he tried to step around her but with her hands clutching at him, blocking his path, short of walking right over the top of her, he was cornered. “Sorcha, what are you doing?”

“What I think we both want…” she purred up at him, her fingers clutching at his belt. Anger flushed though Lucien at that, his heart pounding in his chest as it set his blood racing, and he pushed her hands away. 

“No…” he growled.

“I know what High Lords want.” She said, eyes large as she looked up at him from the floor, “And you are one, if not yet in title…” One of her hands ran up the outside of his leg and he inched away. “I can feel it in you.” Her hands followed him and Lucien clenched his teeth, resisting the urge to throw her back onto the floor, away from himself.

“Sorcha…” he ground her name out between his teeth. 

“Yes?” She asked innocently. Lucien shook his head, about to tell her to get out of his way when hurried footsteps caught his attention and he looked up to see Elain rush around the corner, coming to an abrupt stop when she saw him. “Oh!” Sorcha exclaimed, laughing and edging away from Lucien, “I thought you said she was busy with her sisters…”

He brushed the priestess’ hands away from himself, his eyes on Elain. Lucien did not think that he had ever seen Elain look at anyone the way she was currently looking at Sorcha and, as the priestess crawled away from him, he was finally able to step around her. Elain was still watching Sorcha and, when the blonde finally got to her feet, still giggling and smoothing her hair down, Lucien’s heart dropped into his stomach as his mate turned silently and strode away.


	140. Chapter One Hundred and Forty

**Chapter 140**

Elain had only gotten halfway down the next hallway when she heard Lucien hurrying after her. “Elain?” his hand gently touched her arm, and she turned to look at him. He looked horrified, and terrified, and she tilted her head. “That… that was not at all what it looked like…”

“Oh?” She asked, “It wasn’t that horrible priestess trying to trap you into accepting her attentions?”

“I… okay, yes…” he blinked and she lifted a hand to his shoulder. 

“I am glad she did not succeed.”

“Why did you walk away like that?” he asked, and she felt his fingers at her waist, sliding gently over the material of her dress, stroking. 

“Because,” she replied, swallowing the anger that flared in her once again, “I didn’t know what I would do to her if I stood there any longer…” she slid her hand across his shoulder, “As soon as she was away from you, I had to leave…” Lucien’s hand slid around her waist to rest against her lower back, warm and steady. Looking up at him, Elain leaned closer, sliding her hand from his shoulder up the side of his neck as she met his eyes. “Are you alright?” she asked him, trying to read the emotions she saw flickering through his russet eye. After what Ianthe had done to him in the past, Elain was unsure how Sorcha’s actions would affect him. Lucien nodded, smiling gently at her.

“I am alright, Petal.”

Going up on her toes, Elain pressed her lips to Lucien’s cheek, smiling when she felt him lift her a few inches off of the ground for a moment before settling her back on her feet. “Good.” She murmured, “Then let’s return to the others.”

“Were you looking for me?” he asked, when she took his hand and walked with him back into the hall. 

“I heard your heartbeat suddenly increase in pace…” she squeezed his hand, “And I could feel your anger…”

“So you came running?” he asked, smiling, and Elain glanced up at him. 

“Of course I did.”

“Nesta didn’t follow you?” Elain gave a slight laugh at that and shook her head. 

“I had left her and Feyre at our table, and was looking for a pitcher of wine…”

“Oh, she didn’t know you left…” Lucien laughed then and Elain smiled at him before scanning the room and finding her sisters where she had left them. “I have a book for the three of you.” He went on, and she began leading him across the room. “Several accounts of successful seers who anchored themselves to their mates.”

“You wanted to show Nesta and Feyre?” She asked, knowing the instant that she had asked the question, that he had hoped to ease Nesta’s mind. 

“Yes.”

When they reached the couches that her sisters were still sitting at, Elain sank down, pulling Lucien beside her and then grinning at Nesta.

“What’s that look?” Nesta asked, tilting her head, her eyes assessing. 

“Lucien has something that you might be interested in.” Elain said, nudging Lucien into producing the book. He took a moment to flick through it before handing it, open, across the little table to Nesta. 

Watching as her eldest sister took the book and settled back into her seat to begin scanning the words before her, Elain smiled. Pride swelled in her, and she took Lucien’s hand once again, holding it gently in her own lap. She was so very proud of him for coming up with the correct solution to use the bond to anchor her to him, and she was proud of him for finding the evidence they would need to know what to do. More than that, he had sought to reassure her sisters, knowing that they were unsettled about the whole thing and, as she turned her head to look at Lucien, Elain could see the concern in his russet eye as he watched Nesta read what he had given her. Holding his hand with one of her own, Elain slid her other hand up his forearm to his elbow, meeting his eyes when he turned to look at her. “Thank you.” She breathed, and he held her eyes, nodding in acknowledgement.

“Of course, Petal.” His thumb traced her knuckles gently. 

When Nesta tilted the book to show something to Feyre, Elain squeezed Lucien’s hand. “Help me find that wine I was after?” she asked lightly, grinning when he nodded again. She let him lift her to her feet, all courtly and elegant, and she couldn’t help a grin when he tucked his arm under hers before leading her across the room to the long table across the far wall currently arranged with small fruit dishes, pastries, and wine. 

“This looks good…” Lucien reached for a small pastry, lifting it to his lips and taking a small bite. Elain grinned at the appreciative sound he made while she picked up a small yellow fruit and bit it in half. The sweet juice filled her mouth and she made an appreciative sound of her own while her eyes roved the table for a wine pitcher and some empty goblets. Popping the other half of the fruit into her mouth, Elain froze when she heard Sorcha’s voice nearby. 

“It is quite shocking, isn’t it?” The priestess was saying, her voice not-quite-hushed, as if pretending to try to keep her voice down, but not actually attempting to do so. 

“He used to be quite good-looking.” Another female voice, that Elain didn’t recognise, answered. 

“I had actually forgotten about the entire thing.” Sorcha said, “Forgotten that _she_ ripped his eye out and did _that_ to his face.” Elain’s eyes went directly to Lucien, and his expression told her that he could hear Sorcha as well, “Truth be told, I hadn’t actually seen it before that curse was put in place and the mask hid everything. And I hadn’t seen him at all since the curse was broken and the mask came off. I had no idea how bad it was until he came here… What a waste.” Sorcha’s voice held a deliberate regretful tone that made Elain’s blood boil, “He did used to be very handsome.”

When Lucien noticed Elain’s eyes on his face, he dipped his head, letting his hair fall to obscure his scar and metallic eye and she took a step toward him. “Lucien…” She felt embarrassment from him down the bond and she spun to the table, picking up another of the soft yellow fruits before turning back to the room. Her eyes swept the room until she found Sorcha nearby and she threw the fruit as hard as she could at the back of the priestess’ head. 

As an indignant shriek went up from the blonde, Elain seized Lucien’s arm and dragged him behind a nearby billowing curtain. Backing herself up against the large window, Elain pulled Lucien firmly to her, adjusting the curtain behind him so that they were completely hidden from the rest of the room. 

“Did… you just…” he blinked at her, his russet eye peering at her from beneath his fiery hair.

“So what if I did?” She murmured, reaching a hand up and brushing his hair back from his face, tucking it behind his delicately pointed ear. “She’s a horrible bitch.” She could still feel embarrassment coming off of Lucien, and his eyes were looking her over, seemingly unwilling to meet her gaze and Elain let out a sigh. Gently, she traced her finger down his scar from his brow to his jaw, watching his face as she did so. “Look at me, love.” She breathed, making sure that her gaze was steady when his eyes met hers. “Don’t hide your face from me…”

“I…” he let out a sigh, his hands settling warm and firm against her waist as he pressed against her. “I’m sorry. I … forget.” She traced her fingers down the scar again, making sure that he could feel the love and affection behind her touch. 

“You told me once before,” she murmured, “That it wasn’t long after it happened that the curse was inflicted upon the Spring Court.” He nodded and she continued, “You said that you hadn’t gotten used to seeing yourself… seeing this…” her fingers moved gently over the scar, “And you said that you still aren’t used to it…”

“My reflection still surprises me sometimes.”

“You’ve said that before too…” Holding his face gently in her hands, Elain drew him down so that she could press her lips to his forehead. “You know that what she said is nonsense, don’t you? She’s just angry about what happened in the hallway.”

“I know… but I still feel…” he gave a shrug, and Elain frowned. “I’m just not used to it.”

“Do you know what I feel when I look at you…” her fingers traced his cheek, down to his jaw, “All of you…?”

“I couldn’t imagine…” He smiled at her, his tone teasing. 

“When I see your extremely attractive face…” she murmured, sliding her hands down his arms as she leaned further back into the window. “I feel all sorts of things…” Slowly, Elain lifted one of her legs, bringing it up to hook carefully around his waist, smiling when one of Lucien’s hands slid to her thigh, holding her there. She felt his excitement, and heard his heartbeat increase as he looked at her, raising an eyebrow above his russet eye. 

“We are still in the dining hall…” his voice was barely a whisper. 

“Yes…” Elain felt a sense of satisfaction at the look on Lucien’s face now, and at the fact that she knew that he would be very into this. His reaction had been precisely what she had anticipated it would be, and there was no sense of embarrassment about him now. “And you are so very appealing…”

Biting back a soft groan when she felt Lucien press himself against her, Elain allowed her eyes to close. “You don’t want to do this here…” his breath was hot against her ear and she slid one of her hands up the back of his neck into his hair. “Half the Court would have seen us come behind this curtain.”

“I know.” He was right. She definitely didn’t want to have anyone open the curtain on them while doing anything so indecent, but she had known that Lucien would find the idea exciting. As his lips moved down her throat, Elain combed her fingers through his hair, enjoying the heat that was now burning through her. “Should…” she breathed, “go back…”

“Mhmm.” Lucien’s reply was murmured against her skin, “Nesta has probably finished reading that book…”

“Yes…” the word came out as a sigh, and Lucien slowly released his hold on her thigh, allowing her to lower her leg to the floor. 

“To be continued later, then.” He told her, his voice low, as he lifted his head enough to meet her eyes. Elain nodded, her hands moving to straighten her dress, smoothing it over herself as she tried to ensure that she looked presentable. Lifting her hand then to smooth Lucien’s hair down, Elain let her eyes move over him, taking in his every feature, lingering on his golden eye and scar.

“I look forward to that.” She breathed, stroking his hair back from his face again and tucking it behind his ear once more so that it obscured none of his face. Letting her fingers then gently caress his cheek before she lowered her hand, she watched as his eyes closed for a moment before he pressed a kiss to her forehead and reached back to open the curtain. Casually, they slipped back into the room, and Elain snagged a pitcher of wine from the table by the wall while Lucien collected several goblets, before they returned to where Nesta and Feyre still sat, the book still open between them. 

“Did I just see you throw fruit at that priestess?” Feyre asked, a wide smile spread brightly across her face. 

Elain raised an eyebrow, keeping the rest of her face as neutral as she was able. “Yes.” She said simply, pouring the wine into the goblets and then sitting back in her seat, her own goblet cradled carefully in her hands. “I believe you did.”


	141. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-One

**Chapter 141**

It seemed to have worked. Whatever Nesta and Feyre had read in the book that Lucien had given them had appeared to reassure them that the plan to use the bond would work, and they had all sat and talked and Elain couldn’t remember the last time that she had felt so completely comfortable and content. To see her sisters interact with Lucien in such a comfortable and inclusive way made her heart happy, and she couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face. This. This was her family.

“You look extraordinarily pleased, Petal.” Lucien’s voice was soft, breathed against her ear, as he leaned in to her. Turning her head, and lifting her gaze to meet his, Elain nodded. Wrapping her fingers around his wrist, she brought it up, pressing a kiss to the palm of his hand, her eyes still on his. Heat flared in his russet eye, and Elain turned her head just a little so that he could cup her cheek with his hand. “You let me know when you’re ready to go to bed.” His voice was still soft, but Elain could hear a rougher edge to it, and she smiled at him. His hand slid from her cheek around to the back of her neck, and he leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“Now.” She murmured, smiling as she heard his heartbeat quicken. Lifting her chin a little to meet his eyes she saw the hot spark behind that russet eye and he nodded. 

“You want to take this?” Feyre passed Lucien the book he had given to them, and Elain watched him take it with a smile. 

“Anyone notice where that priestess went?” Nesta asked, and Elain turned a little to survey the room. She hadn’t seen Sorcha since she’d thrown the fruit at her for what she had said about Lucien, and how she had made him feel. She also hadn’t been looking for her.

“I think she walked out a while ago.” Feyre replied, smiling as Rhys approached and seated himself on the armrest of her chair. One of his arms snaked around Feyre’s shoulders, and Elain watched her sister lean into him. “She hasn’t come back.”

“Probably gone to corner someone else.” Elain muttered and Feyre tilted her head. Realising that she hadn’t told her sisters what she had come across in the hallway, she reached a hand out to her younger sister. She knew that Feyre didn’t need to touch her to look into her mind, but she felt this made what she was offering clear. It was evident that her sister understood her, because a light frown appeared between her eyebrows before Feyre leaned forward to take her offered hand. The brush on her mind was light, and Elain tried to concentrate on what she had seen when she had gone looking for Lucien earlier. 

When Feyre released her hand, Elain was surprised by the anger in her younger sister’s eyes. She watched as Feyre’s blue-grey eyes focused on Lucien, looking him over, as her frown deepened. It was then she remembered that Lucien had told her that it had been Feyre who had found him with Ianthe in the forest when the priestess had tricked him and shackled him to a tree, and that it had been Feyre who had saved him that day. An unbidden image of Lucien, his back to a tree and his pants undone, flashed before Elain’s eyes and she couldn’t help comparing that image to the one she had seen in the hallway when Sorcha had trapped him against the wall as she knelt before him. Horror washed through her and, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lucien’s head turn her way, evidently having felt something of it down the bond. 

Anger flared within her, and she remembered the night she had first seen visions of what Ianthe had done to Lucien. It had been the night she had first told him that she loved him. She had decided then that she never wanted anyone else to ever touch him. Not after everything that had been done to him by Ianthe, and certainly not when he didn’t want it. He should not have had to endure that kind of thing again. It wasn’t fair.

“Petal…?” he asked, his hand taking one of hers gently. 

“Take me to bed.” She breathed, low enough that the others wouldn’t hear her. The smirk that crossed Rhys’ features suggested that he had, in fact, heard her however. Lucien got to his feet, lifting her with him, a hand beneath her elbow. Elain’s attention caught on Feyre’s face however, and she could tell that her sister was silently communicating with her mate. She watched as Rhys frowned, his violet eyes doing a quick sweep of the room before he nodded, his hand brushing the back of Feyre’s neck. 

Nesta was looking from one of them to the next, clearly having seen some kind of communication between them but nobody had shared with her what was happening. “What are you doing?” she asked, looking up at Elain. 

“We’re going to bed.” She replied softly, and Nesta’s gaze shifted to Feyre who uncrossed her legs. 

“And we are going to speak to Helion.” The High Lady of the Night Court said firmly. “Nesta, would you like to join us?”

“Uh… Alright.”

Elain caught Feyre’s eyes as Lucien began leading her toward the door and, when Feyre lifted her chin slightly, Elain knew that her sister was going to tell Helion exactly what Sorcha had done. The thought sent a flush of satisfaction through her and she smiled at Lucien when they got out into the hallway. “Not a bad evening afterall…” he said, tucking the book he was carrying up under his free arm. 

Elain thought again of the way that her sisters had treated him when the four of them had been sitting and talking, and she smiled. “I guess so.” She replied, looking up at him, and smiling when she saw that his hair was still tucked behind his ear, where she had put it, allowing her a complete and unobscured view of his face. 

It didn’t take them long to get back to their room, and by then Elain was trying to sort through everything she could feel. She was delighted at the progress with her sisters, especially Nesta, and she was happy that Lucien was so evidently also pleased by it. Beneath that, though, she was upset. Sorcha had crossed a line, both in what she had done in that hallway, and then later with what she had said. Remembering the embarrassment that she had been able to feel coming off of Lucien at the priestess’ words, Elain’s heart hurt. 

As soon as the door was closed behind them, she turned to face Lucien, watching as he set the book down atop a pile of others. Moving closer, she went up on her toes, wrapping her arms around him, and leaning into him when she felt his own arms come around her waist. “What is it?” he asked, and she could hear a smile in his voice. 

“Tell me how you feel.” She murmured. 

“How I feel?” One of his hands settled against her back. 

“About what Sorcha did.” Elain lay her cheek against his chest, “I was thinking about Ianthe…”

“Oh.” Disgust and shame reached Elain down the bond then, and she frowned. “I’m alright.” He said gently, his hand running up and down her back. “Sorcha isn’t the same as Ianthe.” He told her, “Ianthe wanted to mix my bloodline with hers… Sorcha just wants a way to make herself important. She isn’t directly after me.” He kept stroking Elain’s back as he spoke, “I’ve seen her following Eris around, and sitting in Tarquin’s lap…”

“I hate that she touched you.” Anger bubbled within her and Lucien smiled down at her. He lifted a hand to her cheek, his fingers tracing her cheekbone. 

“I hate it too, my love.” He murmured, “But she’s gone and it’s not her hands on me now.”

She figured that he knew the effect those words would have on her, and she smiled as something in her chest eased a little. Returning his smile, Elain slowly ran her hands up and down his arms, making a show of it, smiling more widely when this earned a soft chuckle from her mate. 

“Is that all I get?” he asked, his own fingers moving across her shoulder and to her throat. Elain watched his face as he gently traced the garnet necklace as it lay flush against her skin, and she watched heat flare in his russet eye. “Have you ever taken this off?”

“Not even once.”

Lucien’s eyes lifted to meet hers and she smiled gently.


	142. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Two

**Chapter 142**

He couldn’t stop his fingers from tracing the garnet necklace around Elain’s neck. Over and over, his fingers went from the chain down to the garnet pendant, he traced the tiny golden leaves surrounding the stone, and then his fingers went back to the chain, beginning again. “You’ve really not taken it off at all?” he breathed, fire simmering beneath his skin. 

“Well,” she murmured, and he looked up to meet her eyes again. “When I tried to find you when you were missing with Thesan, I removed it from around my neck, but I still held on to it…” she smiled, “It was still touching me… so I don’t count that. I never let it go.”

“It helped you see?” he asked, tilting his head and looking at the garnet again. 

“It helped me focus on you.” She replied.

“Like an anchor,” he murmured, thinking. 

“What’s that look?” she asked, and Lucien smiled, remembering Nesta ask her the same thing earlier in the evening. 

“Nothing.” He replied, “Just thinking for later…” His gaze slid past her to the table and he grinned, giving her a small wink. “You asked me to take you to bed…”

“I did.”

“Are you still sleepy?” his grin widened. 

“I never was.”

“Ah…” Lucien lifted a hand to Elain’s hair, stroking her gently, and enjoying the silky feeling beneath his hand. He loved how she had grown as their relationship had deepened and she had become more and more comfortable with him. He especially liked it when she was playful, and would tell him what she wanted. “Bed, then?”

Elain nodded, her wide brown eyes trained on his face. 

Leaning forward, Lucien smiled when Elain went up on her toes as if to kiss him, but then he’d leaned past her to reach the table and he lifted one of the books. He heard her disappointed huff and he couldn’t help a soft laugh. “Sorry, Petal.” He grinned, remembered the last time he had tricked her like that in the glade in the Spring Court. The rest of that afternoon had quite easily taken the place in his mind has his very favourite memory, and he rather hoped the rest of this evening proved just as lovely. 

“Are you?” she asked, hands on her hips as she looked up at him. “Prove it.”

Laughing again, Lucien wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her toward the bed. “Alright…” He grinned as she settled back against the pillows and turned her dark eyes on him again. “I thought we might read a little…” he settled beside her, “I had thought, at first, that we might read a few of the accounts I found today, but now I’m thinking we might read some of this…” He oh-so-very-much enjoyed the look on Elain’s face when she recognised the book he was holding out to her.

Faster than he had seen her move, she had snatched it from his hand and pushed it under her leg, trying to hide it. “That’s not mine.” She said, “That’s Nesta’s… I… was going to give it back to her…”

He was grinning so hard that his face hurt as he leaned over and pulled the book out from under her leg. “Oh, Petal.” He purred, “I have no doubt you borrowed it from Nesta…” he watched as she turned scarlet, “But you’ve been reading it since we last left the Night Court.”

“I…” she fell silent, just staring at the book and, he suspected, avoiding his eyes.

“I had a bit of a flick through earlier…” Elain’s eyes flicked directly to him then, “and it seems pretty good…” he watched her eyes widen. “Why don’t we read some together…?”

*

Elain’s heart was thundering in her chest, and she could feel her face burning. She could feel her whole body burning, if she were to be honest with herself. Lucien had found the book that she had borrowed from Nesta? And he had read some of it! He knew exactly what she had been reading. 

“Together?” she asked, her voice weak. He nodded, smiling at her and holding the book out again. Her hand shaking, Elain took it, still looking at him and trying to read his expression. He seemed completely tickled to know that she had been reading this kind of thing, and she could feel his excitement reaching her down the bond again.

“The bit you’re up to seems pretty good. Why don’t we go from there?”

Obediently, Elain’s hands moved to find her bookmark, and she flipped the book open. Her heart was still thundering, faster than Lucien’s own, and she didn’t know how he managed to appear so calm when she could feel him practically burning from within. He made an excited sound and settled down against her, one arm sliding around her to pull her to himself. 

Drawing one deep breath after another, Elain nodded and steadied herself. “Alright… ah… do you want to know the plot first?”

“There’s plot?” he asked, sounding amused. 

“ _Yes_ …” Elain muttered, “That’s what makes it good…”

“Tell me the plot.”

“Well…” Elain murmured, “This is the second in the series. And so now she is free to be with her lover, and they have set up their own manor out in the countryside. But there are some inheritance issues… and it also kind of seems that her lover isn’t who he has always thought he was.”

“Intriguing…” 

Elain’s cheeks burned again. She didn’t know how she was meant to go straight from the new information that Lucien knew that she was reading this, to reading it out loud to him. There should definitely be a few more steps in there in between. “Okay…”

Lucien’s cheek rested against her shoulder as he made a show of getting comfortable. “Okay, go.”

Letting out a deep breath, Elain nodded again, smoothing the page as she looked at it. “ _Rohan was standing in the door to the stable, out of breath, and looking wild._ ” She tried to clear her throat, hoping to make her voice steadier. “ _He_ …” she broke off again, shaking her head. “Lucien, I can’t read this out loud.” She breathed.

He looked up at her and smiled, “Would you prefer me to do it?”

“Yes…” She liked that idea far more. The thought of Lucien reading the scene she was pretty sure was about to happen, was far more appealing to her. He lifted a hand to take the book as he sat up straighter, leaning back against the pillows, and this time Elain settled down against him, leaning into his side. She rested her head against his shoulder, and released a breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding. 

“ _Rohan was standing in the door to the stable, out of breath, and looking wild. He strode forward quickly, his eyes on her, and she backed into a stall, wanting to give herself time to prepare for what she knew was to come. The moment he reached her, his hands went to her dress, pulling it open and then down off her shoulders, and she was thankful that everyone else had gone for the midday meal early. Sinking down into the hay, she had thought that Rohan would be on her in an instant, but instead he had grabbed her hips and turned her over, lifting her to her hands and knees. She braced herself as his hands yanked the skirts of her dress up past her hips and then she gasped when one of his hands went between her legs. She loved it when he got like this, and she was only too willing to allow him to do exactly as he liked. Hearing his laboured breathing, she knew that he was ready and an instant later she felt him press against her. One of Rohan’s hands stroked tenderly up her back and so she was ready when he pushed forward, sliding deep inside of her. After only a moment of stillness, one of Rohan’s hands grabbed one of her shoulders, pushing her down, and then he was thrusting quickly_ …” 

Elain couldn’t take her eyes off of Lucien’s face as he read. Listening to his beautiful cultured voice, she was almost certain that this was better than when she read anything on her own. There was no outward sign that suggested Lucien felt anything or was in any way affected by the words that he was reading, yet Elain could hear his heartbeat, and she could feel him through the bond. She was picturing everything that he was saying, only, in her mind, Rohan had become Lucien.

After a pause, Lucien evidently became aware that Elain was watching him and he turned his head to look back at her. “This is saucy stuff…” he grinned, and Elain reached up with one hand to draw him down into a kiss. The moment her lips met his, Elain could feel the fire burning within him. So often close to the surface, it was right there, ready to burn through the both of them, and she was even more impressed that he was able to appear outwardly so unaffected. She hardly noticed when Lucien tossed the book aside, but then he had wrapped her in his arms as he sank down over her, licking teasingly at her, and pushing to deepen the kiss.


	143. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Three

**Chapter 143**

With a groan, Elain opened to him, sliding both of her hands into Lucien’s flamelike hair. His tongue swept her mouth, licking at her in a way that made her groan again and, when he began rocking against her, she tugged gently at his hair. Lucien lifted his head just a little, his eyes flicking back and forth across her face. “You like that?” he grinned and she nodded, panting just a little. “Is this what you had in mind when you asked me to take you to bed?” one of his hands was tracing the garnet necklace again and Elain’s breath shuddered when he picked the pendant up before placing it very slowly and deliberately against her skin where it should sit.

“Yes…” she breathed, “I didn’t know you were going to suggest storytime first…” 

“Oh, I like storytime.” He told her, fingers now grazing her cheekbone. “Especially stories borrowed from Nesta.”

“If you like,” Elain began, trying to hide her own grin, “I can ask her to lend you the first in the series…”

“Why don’t you just tell me about it.” He purred, his hands moving down her body, and Elain’s eyes closed when his lips brushed her cheek and moved to her throat. “Better yet…” he went on, “Why don’t you show me?”

Elain felt the flush of excitement that went through both herself and Lucien at those words, and she brought a hand up to his face, letting him know that she wished to look at him. Lucien’s face was a little flushed and she could easily see that he was well and truly into this now. There was no pretence of being unaffected from him, and his russet eye just about blazed with that inner fire she could so often feel within him. “Show you?” she asked, thumb tracing his jaw.

“Mhm.” Lucien nodded, and Elain watched his eyes continue to move over her quickly as his heartbeat thundered in her head. She could feel the need coming off of him in searing waves now and she was unsurprised when she felt his hands begin working to pull her dress from her shoulders. 

Elain helped him as much as she was able, then began trying to get him out of his own clothing, giving a grunt of satisfaction when it was pushed off the side of the bed to join her dress on the floor. Lucien began rocking against her again, and she could feel him hard and ready against her thigh. “How…” she murmured, one of her hands resting against his shoulder, “How do you want me to show you?”

He gave a groan as he lifted his head, his lips gliding along her skin as he did so. “Why… don’t… we…” Lucien’s eyes closed for a second, and Elain could feel him trying to control himself. “Pick a scene from your book…” his eyes opened to meet hers again, and Elain felt her heartbeat go through the roof. “Pick a scene… and we’ll see if reality can live up to fantasy…”

Unable to control her own breathing, Elain nodded, sliding one of her hands around the back of Lucien’s neck and into his hair again. “That scene you read…” she told him, and he gave a twisted smirk as he met her with surprised eyes.

“Are you sure, Petal?”

Elain nodded. It had been an easy choice. It was the only scene that he knew, which would be very helpful. But also, she had been wondering for a while now what it would be like to let Lucien have her from behind. She had thought to wait until after their bond was complete, but this was good too.

“Anything specific about it?” he asked her, brushing her hair back from her face with one of his large hands. “What did you like?”

“I…” she looked up at him, meeting his eyes, “…I…”

“Say it,” he breathed, smiling at her, “Tell me what you want.”

Remembering what Lucien had once told her, that she could say anything to him without fear of judgement, Elain nodded. “I want to feel you behind me.” She watched as he tilted his head, his eyes flicking back and forth across her face again, that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he did so. 

“Are you certain?”

“Yes.” She held his gaze, “If you want to…”

“I think I would like that…” He bent to press his lips to hers, and Elain smiled into the kiss. She felt Lucien’s gentle hands move slowly down her body, skimming across her ribs and down past her stomach to her hips. He lifted himself then, bracing himself with a hand by her head, and his other hand tightened at her hip, urging her to turn. 

Finding herself suddenly unable to swallow, Elain rolled over onto her stomach, closing her eyes when she felt Lucien press himself carefully against her back. He swept her hair aside then and, a moment later, she felt his warm lips at the back of her neck. Allowing a small pleased sound to escape her, Elain smiled, reaching back with one hand when she felt Lucien now firmly pressed against her arse. When her fingers wrapped carefully around him, Lucien gave a soft gasp, his lips at her ear. “Ugh…” he breathed, his hot breath sending tingles moving down her spine, “I need to…”

“Okay…” Elain replied, still stroking him slowly. 

“Alright…here…” Lucien lifted her to her knees and she leaned back against him, enjoying the feel of his warm firm chest against her back. “I think we might do this a little differently to your book…” he murmured against her ear, and Elain nodded again. Lucien began tentatively kissing his way down the side of her throat as one of his hands slid up to clasp at her breast, and the other went down between her legs. 

“Ah…” Elain bit her lip, trying to hold in any further sound as she allowed her head to drop back against Lucien’s shoulder. She widened her legs for him, lifting one of her own hands back to take hold of his hair. 

“That good?” he asked, breath hot against her throat and Elain nodded, her eyes sliding closed once again. “Here… just a little…” both of his hands moved to her hips, lifting her slightly, and Elain bit her lip more tightly as she felt him press into the correct position. “Here, Petal…” He use the firm grip he had on her hips to bring her down onto himself, and Elain’s hand tightened in his hair as she felt his hot breath panted against her throat. 

“Oh…” Elain allowed herself a soft groan, shifting her hips slightly to try and find a more comfortable angle as she waited to grow used to the feeling of Lucien hot and pulsing inside of her. 

“Ready?” he kissed the back of her neck, and Elain gave another groan. 

“Yes.”

One of Lucien’s hands went to her shoulder, and he guided Elain forward until she could take her weight into her hands, bracing herself with her arms. She felt him moving behind her, adjusting himself to the correct height, and then the hand on her shoulder became more firm. When he thrust forward, into her, Elain closed her eyes, allowing her head to dip and she swallowed the small sound that tried to escape.

His hand moved from her shoulder, gently caressing her, rubbing slowly up and down her back before he thrust again and Elain gave a soft gasp. “Ah…” she bit her lip before he repeated the action moments later. “Ah…”

Lucien’s other hand slid down the outside of one of Elain’s thighs, and he shifted it to adjust her stance, widening it slightly. “How’s… uh… that…?” his voice was low as he thrust again and Elain nodded, her hair falling into her face. Both of Lucien’s hands then went to her hips and, when she felt the tight grip they found there, Elain braced herself for what was to come.

Lucien’s thrusts were smooth and deep, and he used the grip he had on her hips to begin pulling her back to meet himself as he moved. Elain’s breath was coming in gasps, and she found that without being able to see him, without being able to watch his face, all she was left with was the feel of him. There was nothing else but the feeling of his hands on her skin, and how it felt as he moved inside of her. Hot. Relentless. Powerful.

When her arms began to weaken, Elain allowed herself to lean further forward, coming to rest on her elbows. One of Lucien’s hands slid up her skin to the back of her neck, caressing her and holding her there. “Are you alright?” his voice was rough, and Elain nodded. She gasped then, when he thrust again, the new angle allowing him to push deeper, and her hands clenched around handfuls of the sheet beneath her.

“Ahh…” She pressed her head against her forearm, pushing herself back as her small cries became more high-pitched and Lucien began increasing his pace. 

As he moved quicker and quicker, the hand he had gripping the back of Elain’s neck tightened a little and she continued to push herself back to meet him. This was like the book, she thought, because she was more than willing to let Lucien do anything he liked to her in this situation. Listening to his panted breaths behind and over her, Elain groaned as she heard him begin to grunt with his efforts. He had pushed her down a little further, with that hand at the back of her neck, and Elain turned her face so that her cheek was pressed against the sheet as she tried to even her breathing. From this position she didn’t really have much leverage to push herself back to him and she groaned again as he shifted to a new angle. “Mmmm…” her hands clenched at the sheets again when both of his hands slid down to her hips, “Ah… Lucien…” All she could do was arch her back slightly, “Lucien…” She felt his rhythm shift slightly as he have a guttural moan, and then she pushed herself back up onto her hands, turning to look at him over her shoulder. 

“Uh… you… feel so good…” he leaned over her, reaching to kiss her gently and Elain smiled. 

“I… ah, Lucien… I want to see you…”

In an instant, Lucien had lifted her, bringing her back to her knees, and Elain turned to sink into his lap. “Is that better?” he murmured, groaning as she sank back down over him, shifting her hips slowly as she watched his face.

“Yeah…” she panted, one hand coming up to his cheek, stroking gently and brushing his fiery hair back, “Yeah… ah…”

Her back hit the mattress a moment later and she gasped in surprise as Lucien moved over her, his hands helping to wrap her legs around him, while his lips went to her throat. “I prefer being able to see you too.” Lucien told her, grunting into her ear, as he began a steady rhythm again, “Being able to watch your face…see… uh… your reactions… to… what I’m doing to you…”

She met his eyes then when he lifted his head enough to see her face, tangling one of her hands in his hair. Fire was blazing brightly behind his russet eye and something similar met her down the bond, increasing in heat the longer he looked at her, watching every expression that crossed her face. Noting each beat of his racing heart, Elain began shifting her hips, meeting each movement he made, holding his gaze. She felt herself reaching for the bond and, not really knowing what she was doing, Elain tried to send him exactly what she was feeling. 

Lucien’s groan let her know that he’d felt it, and then his rhythm changed, and Elain felt herself unable to draw a complete breath. She clung to him, one hand tangled in his hair, and the other tight around one of his arms, unable to help an almost squeal-like sound from escaping her. This only seemed to please Lucien as he pushed on, his hot breath against her cheek, and Elain had next to no warning when she tumbled over her edge, pulling him down and pressing her face into his shoulder as she shrieked. She was only vaguely aware of Lucien’s grunting, panting her name over and over, before he groaned heavily into her ear, and his weight increased over her. 

Elain lay, wrapped around her mate, as she tried to catch her breath. She felt him shift a little, pressing his face into the crook of her neck, and she ran her hand up and down his back as she felt him shudder slightly. “Lucien…” she breathed, pressing a kiss to her forehead. 

He lifted himself slightly, pulling out of her and shifting to the side, as he met her eyes. “What was better?” he asked, his voice a hoarse whisper, “The book or us?”

Elain gave a soft laugh, turning onto her side to face him better. “Definitely us.” She murmured, reaching out to trace her fingers up his arm. “Definitely you.”

“I think,” He said gently, bringing a blanket up to settle over them, “that we should read some of that book every night…”

Elain smiled, cuddling closer, and sliding an arm around his waist. “I don’t mind this idea.” She breathed, contentment washing over her when one of Lucien’s strong arms settled around her, holding her to himself. “I don’t mind it at all.”


	144. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Four

**Chapter 144**

Lucien’s eyes opened as the sun spilled through the window and across the bed. Stretching slightly, he smiled when he found Elain still laying beside him. Gently, he brought a hand up to stroke her hair back from her face, noting the way that the morning sun lit it up to look like actual gold. “Petal…?” he asked, shifting his fingers to her cheek. “Petal, wake up…” Usually he would have let her sleep, figuring that she would need the rest after the previous night, but he knew that there were things to be done before the meeting between the High Lords. “Elain…?”

“Mmmm…” Her head turned toward him and Lucien smiled when her eyes opened to meet his. 

“Good morning.” He breathed, sliding an arm around her waist. He smiled more widely when she cuddled into him, tucking her head up under his chin. 

“Comfy.” She murmured, and Lucien groaned when he felt her lips against his throat. 

“Oh… Petal, we have to get up.”

“No, we don’t.”

“We do.” He replied, his eyes closing as she continued kissing him. “We need to bathe before we get dressed…”

“No.”

He tightened his arm around her, pulling her over and onto himself. “Let’s go.” He said, grinning as he sat up, lifting her into his arms. The blanket fell away as he got to his feet, carrying Elain across the room. Meeting her eyes, he gave her a wink, as she traced one of her hands up the back of his neck before laying her head against his shoulder. “Giving up your protest?” he asked, and she nodded.

“If you’re going to be in the bath, then I’m happy to join you.”

“How sweet.” Lucien set Elain on the edge of the tub as he filled it. While he waited, he fetched a couple of towels and lay them within reaching distance, and then flicked a thought at the tub to heat the water before Elain turned and slid in, sinking back against the side with a sigh. Stepping in and resting back against the other end, Lucien let out a sigh of his own.

He had always very much enjoyed hot baths, and he loved the way that he could feel the hot water having a relaxing effect on his muscles. He knew that he always carried himself around tighter than necessary, and he figured that came from growing up in the Autumn Court with brothers who couldn’t stand him. Every time he sank into hot water, however, Lucien felt himself let go. 

“Your face…” Elain’s gentle voice made Lucien open his eyes to see her crawling toward him. “You look so peaceful.”

“Yes.” He smiled at her, as she lay herself against him. “Hot water…”

“It is very luxurious.” She murmured, and Lucien smiled again, reaching to pick up the soft washcloth. He dipped it in the water before beginning to rub it gently over Elain’s back, her little appreciative groan heating his blood more effectively than the hot water. She lay against him, silently, as he continued to wash her back and then down her arms, before she pushed herself up and took the cloth from his hand. “Thank you.” She murmured, dipping the cloth in the water, and then bringing it up to his chest. “Are you hopeful that the meeting this morning will be productive?”

“Yes.” He replied, “They’ve all had enough time to get together the initial plans… Hopefully we will be able to agree upon a date by which those plans will be put into place and get the route operational.”

“Sounds good.” Elain smiled at him, and Lucien could see actual pride in her eyes. “Feyre told me they looked to you to break it up and allocate responsibilities.”

“It was strange.” He nodded, but Elain shook her head. 

“Clever little Emissary.” She murmured, running the cloth over his chest again, “Son of the High Lord of the Day Court… they all see your worth.”

“You think so?” he asked, and she leaned forward to press her lips to his. 

“Just like I do.” When she met his eyes, Lucien lift a wet hand to her cheek. “It is becoming more and more evident when one looks at you.” She told him, and he felt his pulse quicken. “Learning who you truly are and accepting that has had an impact on you.”

“I think no small part of it is down to my mate.” He smiled at her, watching as she blushed a little at that.

“Oh.” She said, sitting back. “You should get dressed.” She smiled at him and Lucien tilted his head, “You don’t want to be late.”

“Petal?”

Large brown eyes lifted to meet his gaze. “Yes?”

“Did I just say something to… upset you…?”

“No.” She shook her head, “Not at all…” she smiled gently, glancing down at her hands, before back up to meet his eyes again. “I just don’t want you to ignore the fact that the good things you do, and the reason that everyone will see that, is because of you.”

“I know.” He breathed, reaching a hand out to her, his pulse quickening when she took it in one of her own. “But you are a part of it. You make me feel… like I have a purpose.”

“Is that all I make you feel?” she asked, and Lucien raised an eyebrow in surprise. She moved closer again and he nearly jumped when one of her hands took hold of him beneath the water. 

“O-oh… Certainly not.” He breathed, one of his own hands grabbing hold of the side of the tub. His eyes remained on Elain, watching as her expression grew more and more confident as she stroked him gently. As her hand began to move more quickly, those pretty brown eyes lifted to his face, and he knew that she was trying to gauge his reaction to what she was doing. Deciding to show her exactly how he felt, Lucien dropped any pretence from his face, his mouth opening in a gasp as his eyes closed. Elain’s pleasure at his reaction reached him down the bond, and he heard her soft voice encouraging him before he came with a cry.

*

Stepping out of the bath, Elain moved to collect the towels Lucien had placed nearby. She wrapped one around herself, before kneeling by the bath, watching him as he tried to catch his breath. Noticing that the ends of his hair had gotten wet, she lifted it into one of the towels and squeezed gently, trying to get the water out. “You can think about that…” she murmured to him, “while in your meeting later.”

“With Feyre in the room?” he asked, and Elain paused. She hadn’t considered the fact that her sister would be there. 

“She… doesn’t just… invade peoples’ minds.” She said, grinning. 

“Not when she can help it.” He replied, “Which isn’t all the time.”

“True.” Elain had to admit that. “Now,” she said, her voice a little stronger, “Get that gorgeous body out of that bath, and clothe it.”

She felt Lucien’s surprise at her words before he turned to look at her, his eyes wide. She just smiled at him and held a towel out. Wordlessly, he stood up and took the towel, and Elain sat back on her hands to watch him as he stepped out of the tub. 

“Gorgeous body?” he asked, wrapping the towel around his waist. 

“Don’t act like you didn’t know.” She was surprised at her own words this time, and she felt herself blush.

“Oh, I think we will be revisiting this conversation when we have more time.” He winked at her on his way across the bathroom, and Elain gasped when he dropped the towel on the floor in the doorway before striding into the bedroom. Getting to her feet, she hurriedly followed him, stepping over his towel on her way to get another glimpse of him. 

Lucien was pulling on his Day Court attire when she reached the bedroom and he gave her an amused grin which told Elain that he knew exactly what she had wanted. “And what are you going to do this morning?” he asked, his tone light. 

“Nesta and I are going to spend some time with your mother and Viviane.”

“Sounds good.” Lucien moved toward the mirror and pulled a comb through his half damp hair. “I’ll find you when we’re done. Perhaps we can go though some of the stuff I found yesterday.” He smiled at her again as he moved for the door, and Elain nodded her agreement watching him. When he paused by the door and looked back at her, she grinned and hurried forward, throwing her arms around his neck. 

“See you, then.” She said, going up on her toes to press her lips to his cheek, pleasure moving through her when he lifted her off of her feet for a moment. When he set her back on her feet, he pressed a kiss of his own to her forehead, his fingers ghosting over her cheek before he turned and slipped out into the hallway, and was gone.


	145. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Five

**Chapter 145**

“I caught her trying to crawl into Kal’s lap.” Viviane’s voice was as cold and hard as the frozen landscape of her home, and Elain watched the other faerie warily.

“What did he do?” Nesta sounded as unsurprised as Elain felt.

“He told her he was a mated male.” Viviane said, “But then I told her she had better get her arse away from my mate before I made her regret even looking at him.”

“Did she listen?” Elain asked, and Viviane nodded. “Lucien said that he’s seen her do the same thing to Tarquin, and she has been following Eris around.” Elain looked at Nesta, “What was Helion’s reaction when Feyre told him what Sorcha did to Lucien?” 

“He said he would speak with her.” Nesta raised her eyebrows. 

“Did he sound surprised?”

“Not really.” Nesta gave a light shrug. “I don’t understand why he has kept her around.” Her sister went on. “Any priestesses, really.”

“Not all of them are like this one.” Vivane went on. “The priestesses we have in the Winter Court are quite lovely. Dedicated to their work.” The Lady of the Winter Court gave a sigh and a light stretch. “What do you think the mood will be like after the meeting is over?”

“Hopefully,” Ashk put in, “they will have worked well together. I really think the trade route is a wonderful idea, and I know that Eris has put a lot of thought into it. He wants it to be successful.”

“From what the others have said, they all do.” Viviane replied with a smile. “I don’t remember the last time everyone was this cooperative.”

“Neither do I.” 

Elain watched Ashk and Viviane smile at one another before she slid closer to Nesta. Her elder sister eyed her for a moment, her blue-grey eyes assessing. “So…” Nesta murmured, tilting her head, her eyes continuing to move back and forth across Elain’s face. “what is it that you want to tell me?”

“Lucien knows about the book you gave me.”

“I see…” Nesta raised an eyebrow at her, “I feel like there’s more to this…”

“Yes.” With a quick glance at the other two females, Elain checked that Ashk and Viviane were still engaged in their own conversation before she looked back to Nesta and lowered her voice again. “We read some of it. Together.” She smiled as Nesta’s eyes widened just a little. “He suggested that we … act some of it out.” Nesta actually blushed as Elain looked at her, and her sister clamped her hands together in her own lap. 

“W-which bit?” Nesta’s voice was soft, and she sounded hesitant and unable to believe that she was actually asking. 

“Where Rohan comes back and finds her in the stable.”

“O-oh…” Nesta’s eyes widened even further, and her sister leaned toward her. “Did you want to do that? Are you okay?” Seeing something rising in Nesta, Elain reached a hand out and set it on her sister’s knee, hoping to soothe her. 

“I did, and yes… I am okay.” Elain smiled at her, “Very okay.” She watched as Nesta calmed down a little, biting her lower lip as a thoughtful expression washed across her beautiful face. “Nes…?”

“Lucien is kinky, isn’t he…?”

“Nesta!” Elain tried to keep her gasp low enough to avoid the attention of Ashk and Viviane, but she couldn’t help considering her sister’s question. “I… I don’t know?” she replied, “How do you tell?”

Nesta actually looked like she was swallowing a laugh as she composed herself. “He likes… unusual stuff?”

“I don’t know what’s usual…” Elain blinked at her. “Or unusual?” she paused for a second, “He likes… _me_.”

“Of course he does.” Nesta murmured, “The first time you to were _together_ … was…”

“In a glade in the Spring Court.”

“Outside.” Nesta smirked at her, “Does he like doing that outside?”

Elain thought about the rock pool in the Summer Court and nodded. “Mhm.” She then thought about how she had gone down on her knees for him in the snow when they had visited the Winter Court and she blushed. 

“And roleplaying?” Nesta’s smirk widened, “I’ll bet he has lots of interesting tastes for other things.”

“Like what?” Elain asked, unable to help herself.

“Well, I don’t know Elain.” Nesta smiled more gently at her, “You know him better than I do. If you’re liking it all so far, though, I would wager that, being his mate, you’ll like whatever else he’s into as well.”

“Mm…” Biting her lip, Elain thought about that. She had liked all of it. She had been the one to initiate what had happened in the Winter Court in the snow, and she had very much enjoyed their first time together in their glade. She may have been hesitant about being out in the open in that rockpool, but she had loved it all the same. Last night had also been very enjoyable. Nesta hadn’t quite gotten it right in that it hadn’t actually been roleplaying but, now that Elain thought about it, she suspected that Lucien might very well be into that too. When she felt her pulse quicken, Elain realised that she probably would as well. 

Looking up when Ashk sank into the chair beside her, Elain tried to draw her thoughts back to the conversations going on around her. She really didn’t want to be thinking indecent thoughts about Lucien while sitting next to his mother. Smiling at Ashk, when the older faerie reached out to touch the garnet necklace she wore, Elain sat a little straighter. 

“You still wear this.” Ashk said gently. 

“Of course.” Elain met Ashk’s russet eyes. “I love it.”

“And Lucien.” Ashk smiled, “Are you ready to accept the bond?” Elain thought about how Ashk had been in Helion’s room the night she had gone to tell the High Lord that she was ready to do just that. The other female had to know that she was.

“Yes.” Elain tilted her head, “Do you know what Helion is preparing for us?”

“Yes.” Ashk smiled, “I think that you will enjoy it. You both will.”

“And then after that is all over,” Viviane put in, and Elain hadn’t realised that the blonde had even been listening to them. “You have to come back to the Winter Court.”

“Oh, I do intend on it.” Elain smiled at her, remembering that she had told Lucien that she wanted to go back there. That remained the only court that they hadn’t actually had sex in, and she wanted to fix that. After that, Elain thought, maybe they could go back to the Mortal Lands, to that manor that Graysen had given Queen Vassa, and she and Lucien could have another adventure out in that maze she hadn’t properly explored. Outside, in the Mortal Lands, on a property gifted from her ex-fiancé. Elain blinked. Maybe she was kinky too. 

“I’ve said it before.” Viviane smiled, “You’re welcome any time.” The blonde nudged Nesta and bounced a little in her seat. “Oh, I am so excited that you’re going to do it soon. It’s going to be wonderful.”

Elain blushed a little, “I… was thinking… should I get Lucien something?” She asked, her eyes sliding from Viviane to Ashk. “A gift. To celebrate… when we… are properly mated.” She looked at Nesta then back to Viviane. “Is that something that faeries do?”

“Who cares what others do or do not do.” Viviane shrugged, “Do what you want. If you want to get him something, then do it.”

“What should it be?” she asked. 

“You’re giving him yourself.” Nesta said, “I’m sure that’s enough.”

“No…” Elain shook her head, “I mean, yes. Obviously. But I want to give him something else… to mark the occasion.”

“What about…” Ashk began, and Elain turned to Lucien’s mother to see those russet eyes again focused on the necklace. “Something to match the necklace he gave you.”

Lifting a hand to the garnet sitting warm against her skin, Elain nodded. “He had this made for his mate. I could have something made for him.” She thought for a moment, “Perhaps something to be worn around the wrist.” She looked at Ashk again, “There are jewellers here?”

“I will show you.” Ashk smiled at her. “Would you like to go now?”


	146. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Six

**Chapter 146**

When Lucien walked through the door to their bedroom, a pale green dress in his arms, Elain tilted her head, and set the books in her lap aside. “What is that?” she asked, and he smiled widely at her. Her eyes went back to the dress and she got to her feet from where she had been sitting on the bed. “It’s pretty…” Taking several steps forward, Elain’s eyes ran over the fine material as Lucien held it out, letting the sweeping skirts of it fall to full display. “My goodness…”

“You like it, Petal?”

“Very much.” When Elain reached him, she reached a hand out. Lucien let her run her hands over the dress and she couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face. “What is this for?”

“You, obviously.” He smiled. 

“I asked ‘what’, not ‘who’.” She replied, looking up at him and smiling back. “I didn’t think it was for you.”

“You think I couldn’t pull it off?” he turned a little, posing in a way that let her best view his body. “I thought I was gorgeous.”

“You are.” She reached her hand out to touch him instead of the dress. “I’m sure you could pull it off, if you wanted to. But I don’t think it would fit.”

“I’m sure I will pull it off.” He murmured, heat in his russet eye as he looked at her. “Off of you.”

Elain laughed and took a step back. “You’re in an interesting mood.” She grinned, “Was your meeting successful?” 

“It was.” He replied, hanging the dress carefully by the window. “That’s what this is for. Helion wants to invite us all to a grand dinner on one of the northern balconies, overlooking the ocean.”

Elain had seen the northern balconies on her walks with Ashk around the palace, and she could imagine that having a dinner up there would be spectacular. “That sounds lovely.” Her eyes went back to the pale green dress. “Was this you?”

“No…” he replied, his voice hesitant. 

“Helion?”

“Yes.” Elain turned her head to look at Lucien when she heard him shift from one foot to the other. “I… think he enjoys… arranging … the aesthetic… around himself.”

“He does seem one to take pleasure in the visual.” She agreed.

“And the physical.” Lucien replied. Elain eyed him out of the corner of her eye, taking in the amused expression on his face. 

“Rather like his son, then?” she asked, and he grinned at her, moving closer. Elain lifted her chin as he approached, letting him wrap his arms around her waist. She made a small squeak of a noise when Lucien lifted her from the ground, holding her firmly to himself. 

“Has to be where I got it.” He agreed, looking up at her, and Elain slid her arms around his neck. She let the adoration that swelled within her trickle down the bond toward Lucien, pleased with herself for getting so good at that, and the fire that flared to life behind his russet eye told her when he noticed it. “What have you been doing?” he asked, as Elain brought her lips down to brush gently against his cheek, her tongue peeking out just enough to touch his scar. 

“Reading.” She murmured, and Lucien took several steps toward the bed where she had been sitting with the books. “Some of the books you brought from the library…”

“I see…” He set her down on her feet and she turned to the bed, showing him which books she had looked though. “I did say we would spend some time on this today, didn’t I?” he followed her onto the bed, and Elain nodded. 

“If you’re tired after the meeting, we don’t have to.”

“No…” he smiled at her and lifted one of the books she had not yet opened. Elain took it and settled it in her lap, surprised by how heavy it was. “This one has some good reference information about seers and what has been discovered about them.”

“Alright…” Elain flicked it open as Lucien picked up another book and did the same. As she read, she reached a hand out, placing it palm up on Lucien’s leg. Without saying anything, he placed his own hand in hers, linking their fingers together as they both worked their way through their books.

It was a pretty interesting book and, despite herself, Elain found herself reading things that were unrelated to seers but which were intriguing nonetheless. When she turned the next page she was met with a full page coloured portrait. Elain didn’t need to read the title to know who it was. She recognised her from the visions of Lucien’s memories she’d had. Amarantha. He must have sensed her reaction, because Lucien’s hand squeezed hers gently, and he leaned toward her to see what she was looking at.

“Oh.” Elain shuddered at the feeling that met her down the bond and she turned to look at Lucien. He was looking blankly at the portrait, and the look in his eyes was distant.

“No…” she breathed, lifting a hand to his cheek. “Don’t go back there.” He lifted his eyes to meet hers, and she traced her gingers gently down his scar. 

“Do you still wish you could have met her?” He asked, and Elain frowned.

“I’m undecided.” She breathed, “I still would have liked to look into the eyes of the one who did this to you…” she stroked her fingers down his scar again, “But I know she would have been terrifying.”

Lucien nodded slowly, leaning into her hand. “She was.”

Closing the book, Elain pushed it away from herself. “Speaking of females who need to keep their hands to themselves.” She began, “Feyre told Helion about what Sorcha did.”

“He spoke to me about it.”

“What did he say?”

“He told me that he would speak with her.” Lucien said, holding Elain’s other hand in his. “That he will inform her that if he hears further report of her forcing her attentions on those who do not wish for the, that she will be reprimanded, and may forfeit her position in the palace.”

“Do you think she will stop?” Elain asked, her eyes firmly upon Lucien’s face. He shrugged lightly. 

“She does value her position.” He replied, “The threat of losing it may be enough.”

“Okay.” Elain leaned forward to press her lips to his. Lucien held on to her hand, while his other slid around her waist and drew her closer as he met her kiss with enthusiasm. Before she knew it, Lucien had pulled her down beneath himself as he lay her among the book spread out across the bed, and she smiled up at him when he grinned at her. “I thought that we were reading.” She murmured and he raised an eyebrow at her. 

“You kissed me.” He purred, and Elain nodded.

“I did.” She pushed his hair back from his face so that she could see him better. “How long do we have before dinner?” She watched him glance toward the window before he looked back down at her. 

“About an hour.”

Smiling at him then, Elain tangled her hand in his hair. “Well, then you get one kiss, but then we should probably begin getting ready…”

“One?” he asked and she nodded slowly, her eyes on his face. “I’ll try my best to make it a good one…” He dipped his head to her, and Elain found herself parting her lips for him instantly. As he pushed forward, licking at her slowly, she hooked her feet around the back of his legs as a soft moan of appreciation and want escaped her. Lucien continued what he was doing, pressing himself down against her and, by the time he lifted his head to look at her, Elain was regretting that there was now a fancy dinner they were expected to attend. “How was that?” he asked, the smirk across his face telling her that he knew exactly how the kiss had been.

“Mmm…” Releasing her hold on his hair, Elain brought her hand to the back of Lucien’s neck and she pulled him down to herself, lifting her own head to kiss him again. 

“I thought you said only one?” he asked, still smirking when she let him go. 

“I said you get one.” She smiled, “I still had mine.” She let him pull her up and into a sitting position before he got off the bed with almost feline grace. When he held a hand out to her, Elain took it, allowing him to draw her to her feet. 

“Once we’re ready do I get another?”

“As many as you like.” She smiled at him before heading for the bathroom.


	147. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Seven

**Chapter 147**

Lucien’s gaze was burning in to Elain across the table on the Northern Balcony, and she smiled at him. He had hardly been able to keep his hands off of her earlier, when she had first put on the pale green dress that Helion had picked for her, and she had stood in the mirror to have a look at herself. Lucien had approached her from behind, winding an arm around her waist and bringing his lips to her ear. 

“Helion does know what he’s doing.” He had breathed into her ear and Elain had nodded her agreement. The dress did look truly wonderful on her, and she planned to ask the High Lord if she got to keep it. If she did, Elain thought she might like to wear it when she formally accepted the bond, and Lucien as her mate. She wanted that to be a special occasion, and this perfect dress would be wonderful.

Knowing that she would be able to heat Lucien’s blood just a little, Elain met his eyes across the table again and lifted her chin. As she brought a hand up, Lucien raised an eyebrow at her, watching, as she brought the hand to her own throat. Carefully, she trailed her own fingers down to the low neckline of the dress and then slowly across the top of one of her breasts. Holding Lucien’s eyes, she listened as his heartbeat just about tripled in pace and fire erupted behind his russet eye, and she smiled widely at him. The expression that crossed his face then told Elain that she had something to look forward to later, and her own pulse quickened in response. Lucien winked at her and she blushed, unable to help herself.

“If you two are done eye-fucking one another across the table,” Feyre said, nudging Elain who blushed even more thoroughly. “Look who just walked in.”

Elain reached for the goblet sitting in front of her and, with a pang of disappointment, she realised that it was empty. She glanced toward the door and bit back a sigh when she saw Sorcha’s blonde hair bouncing with the priestess’ exaggerated walk. “I see.” She murmured, flicking a glance at Feyre who made a face in response.

When Sorcha headed down the table toward them, Elain went rigid. She met the other faerie’s blue eyes and then Sorcha had stopped by her chair. “I apologise for anything I’ve done that has been inappropriate and crossed the line.” The priestess reached past Elain and set a large pitcher of wine onto the table. “I hope that we can move forward from here.”

“Y-yes.” Elain looked up at her, “Of course.”

Sorcha smiled at her and then continued to make her way up the table, placing another pitcher of wine down as she did so.

“Well, that was weird.” Nesta’s muttered voice made Elain blink and nod her head in agreement. She then reached for the wine and filled up her goblet before glancing at her elder sister. 

“Do you want some of this?”

“Absolutely.” By the time Elain had filled Nesta’s goblet, several more had been placed beside it, and she filled them with a low chuckle before passing them back to their owners. “She may be a whore, but this is good wine.” Nesta said, leaning back in her chair and cradling her goblet appreciatively. 

“Make sure you save some space for your actual dinner before you go getting drunk.” Elain told her, eyeing her elder sister with amusement. Nesta just made a face at her and took another sip from her goblet. Elain picked her own up and did the same. 

“You’re right. It is good.” She looked around at the others. “Is this some kind of special Day Court Wine?”

“I don’t believe I’ve had it before.” Feyre replied, setting her goblet down and watching with wide eyes as platters of food were carried out on to the balcony and dinner was served. Elain did the same, her mouth watering, as she watched plates being set down before those seated further up the table. She realised she hadn’t actually eaten since breakfast, as she had missed lunch while visiting the jeweller with Ashk, and she felt her stomach rumble in anticipation.

“Petal, I do believe you’re looking at that chicken more longingly than you’ve ever looked at me.” Lucien’s voice held the edges of a laugh and she glanced at him.

“Maybe,” Nesta suggested, “you should try roasting yourself a little… a few herbs and spices… nice glaze…”

Both of Lucien’s eyebrows lifted in surprise as his russet and golden eyes slid toward Nesta. “I’ll keep that in mind, thank you.” Nesta just lifted her goblet in way of acknowledgement. Lucien’s eyes went back to Elain and he smirked, “We could probably work on the glaze…”

“ _Lucien_.” Ashk’s voice was a little sharper than Elain had heard it before and Lucien dropped the smirk. 

“Sorry.” 

Elain gave him a small smile when he glanced at her again and he gave her a wink in return, before Elain looked up when someone reached around her to set a plate on the table. The chicken did smell and look delicious, and Elain drew a deep breath, inhaling as much of it as she could. Her stomach rumbled again, and she reached for her cutlery.

*

The ocean crashed pleasantly in the distance, behind Elain when Lucien watched her, and he let his eyes wander down to the coast, taking in the way the golden sun glinted off of the water as it glistened in the light of the day. Having this dinner up here had been a good move by Helion, as the balcony overlooking the cliffs that looked out over the water was a very beautiful, if not dramatic, setting. Letting his eyes drift up and down the table then as those around him received their dinners, he smiled and, when his own plate was set before him, Lucien approached it with enthusiasm. He picked up his goblet and took a sip of wine as he listened to the conversations going on around him. A few places up the table Thesan was going over what had happened in the meeting with Aelius, with input here and there from Tarquin. Rhysand and Eris were doing the same thing in the other direction up the table and, as Lucien lifted a piece of carrot to his mouth, he watched as Helion spoke softly to his mother. Ashk was smiling, even as her russet eyes remained firmly on her plate, but Lucien could see her leaning slightly toward the High Lord of the Day Court.

Lucien found his eyes going back to Elain, as they always did, and he found himself unable to look away from her, especially in that dress she wore. He wondered if the dress was suited specifically to Helion’s tastes, or if the High Lord had known it would be to Lucien’s own tastes. Either way, Lucien suspected that what he had told Elain earlier about pulling it off of her would prove to be accurate. As he watched her, he saw Elain steal a small yellow vegetable from Nesta’s plate and Nesta turn to Elain with a look of mock horror on her face. Elain said something that looked like an attempt to placate her sister before a soft hush went up around the table and Lucien turned his eyes to the end of the table to see Sorcha standing there, holding her hands up to still the conversation. 

“Good evening, friends.” The priestess called, and Lucien flicked a glance at Helion. Did he know about this? Was this something that had been discussed with Sorcha as a way to make up for her past behaviour? The look that appeared on the High Lord’s face, however, told Lucien that he’d known nothing about it.

“Sorcha?” Helion’s voice was questioning, and Lucien turned his eyes back on the priestess.

“Yes, High Lord.” Sorcha smiled at them all, “I would just like to make a quick toast.” She said, lifting a goblet high. “To you, and all the other High Lords.” Those blue eyes scanned the table, “And High Lady, of course.” She smiled beautifully. “A toast, to what you have achieved here, and what you will achieve in future, together. A toast to friendship.”

Lucien lifted his own goblet as everybody around him did the same thing, mirroring Sorcha as she smiled beatifically down at them all. There was the murmured “friendship” from everyone along the table before everybody drank. 

Setting his goblet back on the table, Lucien picked his fork up again. He grinned as he watched Nesta and Elain begin to pretend to bicker once more and Nesta moved as if to defend her plate from her sister. When Lucien shifted his gaze and realised that Eris, sitting the other side of Nesta, was looking back at him, Lucien jumped a little. He couldn’t decided if Eris’ smirk was in response to startling Lucien, or if his brother was amused by Nesta and Elain as his amber eyes were now focused their way.


	148. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Eight

**Chapter 148**

As the dinner plates were cleared away, Lucien heard Helion begin speaking to Elain. “I thought you would like the detailing,” the High Lord said, and Lucien watched Elain nod her head as her hand went to the fine material of the dress.

“Oh, I do.” She smiled brightly, “I like it very much. I was going to ask you if I am to keep it.” Lucien saw her blush slightly, and then Helion gave a gentle laugh. 

“Of course. It was made for you.” The High Lord’s voice was rich and warm, “It would be a shame for it not to be yours when you look so wonderful in it. Lucien, doesn’t she look wonderful.”

“Beyond words.” Lucien said, his eyes still on Elain. His mate’s dark eyes shifted to him, and he watched as her smile lit up her entire face. When he noticed the minstrels by the door beginning to play, and the soft swell of skirling music went up, Lucien pushed his chair back and got to his feet. He made his way around the end of the table and toward Elain. She turned and looked up at him, and he held a hand out to her. “Would you dance with me?” he asked softly. 

Elain’s eyes flicked up and down the table and then to the empty space on the balcony before the minstrels. Nobody else was dancing, and he knew that was what she was thinking. He held his breath as she considered, releasing it only when Elain placed one of her hands gently in his. Smiling at her, he lifted her to her feet and led her across the balcony.   
As he pulled her closer, sliding one of his arms around her waist, he smiled again when she looked up at him. “Why did you want to dance?” she asked, voice gentle. “Nobody else is…?”

“Can you think of a better way to wait for dessert?” he asked, and she smiled again, leaning into him. 

“I think you just wanted to touch me.” She said quietly, so that nobody else could have overheard and Lucien winked at her, turning them both in small circles. He flicked a glance toward the table, keenly aware that more than a few pairs of eyes were directed their way, and he held Elain a little tighter, a little possessively. He knew that she could tell by the way that she lifted a hand, sliding it up over his chest and to his shoulder as she gazed up at him. “Let them look…” she breathed, “Let them see how perfect we are together.”

Lucien thought his heart might burst at those words, and he smiled, bringing his free hand up to Elain’s cheek. She tilted her head back a little, letting him trace her jaw with his thumb, and he wanted to bend to kiss her but, at that moment, the doors to the balcony opened once more and the first trays of dessert were brought out. Elain smiled wickedly at him and he released her. He watched as her eyes followed a tray past, and he led her back to the table, smiling as she sank quickly into her seat between Feyre and Nesta. 

Walking back around the table, Lucien resumed his own spot, eyeing the small chocolate cake that was now sitting before him with interest. He picked up his fork and broke a small piece of cake off before lifting it to take a bite. He watched Elain do the same thing, and he could tell from the look that passed across her face that she liked it. 

“We need this recipe in the Night Court.” Feyre’s voice was also appreciative, and Lucien heard Rhys’ agreement a moment later. 

It seemed as if the same conversation were making its way up and down the table, as a variety of other deserts were brought out and lay on platters before them. Dessert like this, and the view to go with it. Lucien definitely thought that Helion had been on to something.

*

Having finished her first piece of cake, Elain eyed the platter on the table in front of her. A second one did seem like a very good idea to her. She listened to Feyre and Nesta try to decide what the ingredients must be to make it so smooth and soft, and he figured that they would be trying it out when they returned to the Night Court. 

“Why don’t you ask whoever made it?” she grinned, glancing at Feyre who shrugged.

“Where’s the fun in that?” her sister asked her, giving her return grin.

“I’d say it would be in the eating of the perfect cake at the end…”

Feyre tilted her head in acknowledgement. “That’s not wrong.”

“Elain,” It was Helion’s voice that made her look up and across the table to where the High Lord of the Day Court was sitting beside Ashk. Both of them were looking at her and, if she wasn’t mistaken, they appeared to be amused. Wiping surreptitiously at her face, Elain wondered if she had chocolate cake on her. She couldn’t feel anything, however, and she blinked. 

“Yes?”

“I have some good news for you.” Helion said, his amber eyes seemingly alight, and Elain watched as Ashk’s smile grew even wider. 

“Do you?” Elain asked, her gaze flicking between Ashk and Helion. A spark of joy flared within her as they both looked at her, and she felt herself grow warm with anticipation. 

“What you have asked for will be ready tomorrow, if you would like to have a look at it.” Helion’s eyes burned as he looked at her, and Elain nodded her head quickly.

“Yes.” She said, unable to wipe a large smile off of her face, “I would very much like to see.”

“I will take you.” Ashk said, her voice warm, “After breakfast, if you like?”

“That would be perfect.” Elain felt excitement build within her then, and she couldn’t help but look toward Lucien. His attention was on the cake before him, and she figured that he hadn’t been listening. That was alright, she thought with a smile. It would be a surprise. Her eyes going back to Ashk and to Helion, Elain smiled even more brightly as ideas began to swirl through her mind. “Thank you.”

Looking back down at her own plate, Elain continued to think. When Nesta pushed an elbow into her, she glanced up at her elder sister, startled. “Nes?”

“You’re staring at your empty plate, and I know you want more cake.”

“Yes…” Elain reached and claimed a second piece from the table.

“Have you tried it with the chocolate sauce?”

“The what? No?” she looked again at Nesta who eyes the table. 

“There’s a dish of it… just up there.” Nesta’s pale eyes flicked toward the end of the table. “I’ll get it.” 

“Oh…” Elain watched as her sister got to her feet and went to fetch the sauce.

“It is rather good.” Eris was looking at her now and, with Nesta having vacated her seat, Elain had a clear view of him. “You do need the sauce.”

“I wasn’t aware that you were partial to chocolate cake.” Elain said to him, eyeing his plate which had clearly once held both cake and sauce. Eris gave her a smile.

“Not many do.” He told her, “It is reserved, in the Autumn Court, only for special occasions.”

“That’s a shame.” She said, raising an eyebrow. “As High Lord, you should change that. You could have it for breakfast every day.”

An odd look passed across Eris’ face then and he tilted his head, looking at her. 

“That sounds entirely too fun for Eris.” Lucien’s voice held a slight laugh, and Elain grinned and looked across the table toward him. He smiled back at her, sending another look to his brother, and Elain figured that Eris had taken his words for a joke when she heard the High Lord of the Autumn Court give a small huff. Further up the table, she heard Nesta make a sound of triumph as she retrieved a small dish of chocolate sauce, and then the ground trembled and the balcony gave way beneath them.


	149. Chapter One Hundred and Forty-Nine

**Chapter 149**

Elain awoke to screaming. Opening her eyes, she realised that she was laying on the ground, her hair in her face and, as she pushed herself up as much as she could, she bit back a cry of pain. Her whole left leg hurt and, brushing her hair back so that she could see, she looked around to see a large chunk of some kind of rock pinning her leg. 

“Elain?” Eris’ voice came from behind her, and she twisted around try and see him. The High Lord of the Autumn Court was crouched nearby. When her eyes met his, he moved toward her slowly, as if trying to move as carefully as he was able. “Are you alright?” he asked, and she could see blood running down the side of his face, out of his red hair, and to his chin. 

“I… my leg…” she gave a small sob as she tried to move again, and felt a jolt of pain when she did so. Eris’ amber eyes looked at her leg, and he frowned before he moved again. Elain watched as he gripped the rock pinning her leg before he glanced to her face once more. 

“I’m going to try and move this as little as possible.” He said, his voice surprisingly calm, “As soon as you can get out from under it, do so carefully.”

Nodding, Elain held her breath as Eris lifted. At first she thought that nothing was going to happen, but then she felt the weight lift from her and she scooted away from the rock, gritting her teeth as her leg protested. “Oww…” She gave a small gasp, closing her eyes as her vision swam, “Oww.”

Eris was suddenly beside her again, hands hovering over her leg as if reluctant to touch her. “You’re not bleeding… it’s not too bad… I…” he shook his head, his eyes moving past her. She watched his expression change, growing more concerned. 

“You’re bleeding…” she told him, watching as his blood continued to drip down the side of his face. He nodded and lifted a hand, bringing his fingers away red.

“I know. We have bigger problems.”

Elain blinked, looking at him, and then twisted back around to look at what he had been. She and Eris were alone, and they were on a small section outcropping of the cliffs overlooking the ocean. Pieces of the balcony were strewn around them, and Elain gasped in horror. Eris’ hands were suddenly beneath her arms, half lifting her and she let him bring her to her feet, hobbling slightly when she discovered that her leg wasn’t ready to take her weight. He helped her backwards, away from the edge, until they were back against the side of the cliff. “Cauldron help us.” She muttered, lifting her gaze to look up. “We fell…”

“Us and most of the rest of the table…” Eris replied, “It’s all unstable… stay away from the edge, and try not to move around.”

She looked around at him. “Where’s everyone else?” she asked, her eyes trying to take in everything she could. She couldn’t see anyone but Eris.

“I don’t know…” He replied, “And, I can’t winnow…” he frowned, and Elain realised that he didn’t mean that winnowing wasn’t an ability that he possessed, but rather that it was, and that he couldn’t do it right now. Evidently reading the questioning look that must have been in her eyes, he made a displeased expression as he added, “Faebane.”

Elain’s stomach twisted and she gasped, her eyes going up again. Most of the balcony was gone as far as she could see, and she could still hear screaming from above. “Have… you seen…” her gaze went to the edge of the ledge they were on. Others must have fallen like she and Eris had and, if they hadn’t landed on something like she and Eris had, then they would have hit the water far below and would surely be dead. 

“Some…” he said gently, his hand on her arm as she went to take a step toward the edge to look. “Don’t… it might give way.”

Elain looked up to meet his eyes before glancing back to the edge. She wanted to know where her sisters were. Feyre had been right beside her at the table, she couldn’t be far. What had happened to Nesta who was trying to collect chocolate sauce for her? What about Lucien who had been smiling at her from across the table. With a sickening jolt, Elain realised that she could not hear Lucien’s heartbeat. Gasping, she stumbled away from Eris, her hands coming up to her mouth, struggling to stay upright when her leg screamed in pain. 

“Elain?”

“I can’t hear him!” she cried, staring at Eris who had reached out to her. “I can always hear him!”

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t hear Lucien’s heart!” she moved closer to the edge of the outcropping of rock, wanting to see up on to the balcony, and hoping that a different angle might show her more, but they were too far below to see anything. 

“Elain please… come back here…”

“No!” She was crying now, tears streaming down her face as panic rose in her, heating her from the inside, and she found herself unable to draw a complete breath. “I’ve been able to hear his heart since the moment I came out of the cauldron!” she sobbed, “Even when he was in the mortal lands and so far away from me… I could always hear it… and I can’t now!”

Eris’ hand locked around her wrist and he drew her slowly away from the ledge. “That’s…”

“Is he dead?” Elain sobbed, turning to him, “Is that why I can’t hear it? Did he fall?”

Eris was shaking his head, “I don’t know, Lady.”

“Please…” Elain gripped a handful of Eris’ fine jacket, much like the ones that Lucien often wore, “Please…” she didn’t know what she was asking him for but, as panic consumed her, she found herself unable to form coherent thoughts let alone sentences. As Eris gently lowered her to the floor against the wall again, she cried, listening desperately for the familiar beat of Lucien’s heart in her head, but found only deafening silence. 

Burying her face in her hands, Elain felt as if she might drown in that silence, still unable to draw a complete breath. She slid her fingers up into her hair, straining and trying to reach for the bond, but there was nothing there and she felt a scream rising in her throat. She couldn’t tell if it was the panic or the tears or the ache of the loss of the bond that was the main reason for her being unable to breathe, but she was unable to hold the scream in any longer and she released it as a wail, the pain of it ringing in her own ears. 

“Elain…” she barely heard Eris and, not caring about what he wanted, she kept her face hidden in her hands. She couldn’t stop crying, and she couldn’t stop the panic at the thought that Lucien might be dead. “Elain…” Eris repeated, “It’s probably the Faebane.” 

“…what?” Lifting her head slightly, she rubbed the tears from her eyes, trying to look at him. 

“If I’ve had Faebane, you probably have too. It would block all your magic.” He said, his voice soft, “Even the bond.”

Seizing that explanation and gripping to it with everything she had, Elain swallowed thickly. “Yes…” she choked, nodding. Her eyes went back up to where they could see what was left of the balcony. She could see some movement up there now, but the screaming continued. “How…” she forced out, glancing back to Eris, “How will we get up there?” If he couldn’t winnow, then she didn’t see how they could get off the ledge. There was no way they could climb. Eris shook his head, indicating that he didn’t know, and Elain let out another sob. 

If Lucien were alive and unharmed he would have come for her by now. There was no way he would have left her down here. Beside her, she felt Eris slump back against the cliff face and she glanced toward him. He looked paler than usual, but the blood had ceased running down his face. Instead, it had left a thick, sticky, red trail to his chin, and she figured he would need healing. 

They both looked up when there was a flurry of wings and then Aelius stood before them. The ledge shuddered under his additional weight and Elain’s breath caught in her throat. 

“High Lord.” Aelius moved toward them, his eyes on Eris, “If you would come with me.”

“Take her.”

Aelius blinked, and his eyes shifted to Elain. “I… was instructed to bring you back first…” his eyes went back to Eris. 

“I won’t go first.” Eris replied, “I’ll stay right here. You’ll find me here when you return.”

Elain watched Aelius consider it, then sigh. “Okay.”

When the Peregryn bent and lifted Elain into his arms, she looked at him. “My sisters, and Lucien?” she asked, “Are they alright?”

“The High Lady of the Night Court is fine.” He replied, launching them into the air. Elain hardly noticed, despite the rush of air around them, “I haven’t seen the other. Or Lucien.”

Closing her eyes, Elain tried to manage that piece of information. She allowed the relief she felt at knowing that Feyre was alright to wash over her, but tried to keep the panic she felt for Nesta and Lucien at bay. 

“Elain!” Feyre’s voice went up the instant Elain’s feet touched the ground as Aelius set her down and, a moment later, her sister’s arms wrapped around her tightly. “Are you alright?” 

“I… yes… my leg…” she clung to Feyre, trying to stay upright. “Where are Nesta and Lucien?” She met her sister’s blue-grey eyes. “I can’t hear him, Feyre…” Tears welled in Elain’s eyes, “I can’t hear his heart…”


	150. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty

**Chapter 150**

Refusing to go inside, Elain remained on what was left of the balcony, watching as those who could climbed back up, and Aelius and anyone else who had the ability of flight retrieved those they could find. 

“Is anyone dead?” Elain asked, clinging to Feyre for support as her leg protested so much movement. “Have they found anyone dead?”

“Yes.” Feyre murmured, “Why don’t you sit down?”

“No.” Elain replied, “Not until we find Nesta and Lucien.” She looked at the edge of the balcony again, where the floor gave way to a huge gaping hole and open air. “Who is dead?”

“We don’t know everyone.” Feyre replied, before letting out a sigh. “There was a large shelf in the cliff.” She went on, “It’s where I ended up. Much of the table is there… I saw at least three of the members of the Day Court who…” her younger sister made a face. “They were crushed by debris.” She met Elain’s gaze, “There will be more under the rest of it.”

“Lucien and Nesta…”

“I don’t know.” Feyre said, “Those I saw were sitting up the other end of the table, near Tarquin and Thesan.”

“Thesan must be alright.” Elain reasoned, “Or Aelius wouldn’t be doing what he is.” She knew that the Peregryn would never have left Thesan, even to rescue others from the cliff, if his lover had been hurt.

“He and Tarquin are both unharmed.”

“Kalias and Viviane?” Elain asked, “Helion and Ashk…”

“They’re inside.” Rhys replied, “Tending to those who’ve been injured.” Elain nodded, part of her soothed by that information. She looked around as Aelius landed nearby again, this time with Eris.

“Where’s my mother?” 

“Inside.” Rhys told him, and Eris nodded, looking around the balcony with a frown. The fire that Elain had so often seen inside Lucien was evident in his brother’s eyes as he approached Rhys. 

“Who did this?” The High Lord of the Autumn Court asked, that fire clear behind his words as well. His face had seemed to become a little sharper, a little more feral. 

“We don’t know for certain.” Rhys’ voice was gentle, as if trying to calm the other High Lord, but Elain understood Eris’ anger. She watched Eris stare at Rhys for a few moments, and then she forgot all about either of them because Nesta appeared, staggering across the balcony toward them. 

“NES!” Elain released Feyre’s arm and limped toward her elder sister, reaching out to her well before Nesta was close enough to grab. The moment Nesta’s hard eyes found Elain, her sister went straight for her. Elain felt Nesta’s slim, yet surprisingly strong, arms come around her waist, holding her tightly. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m unharmed.” Nesta murmured, “Probably just a few bruises.” Elain pulled back to look at Nesta and saw her sister doing the same thing. “You can hardly stand…” 

“Some of the balcony landed on my leg.” Elain glanced down for a moment, taking in her already purple ankle. When she looked back up, she saw Nesta’s eyes sweeping the balcony behind Elain, taking in who was there. Tightening her hand around a handful of her sister’s dress, Elain choked back a sob. She still had no idea where Lucien was, or if he was even alive. Nesta’s arms tightened around her in response, and those familiar blue-grey eyes met hers, and held her gaze. 

“Lucien?” Nesta asked gently and Elain felt herself beginning to crumble. She let a sob out then, her eyes closing. 

“I don’t know.” She breathed, “I can’t hear his heart… I can’t feel him…” Shaking her head, Elain held firmly to Nesta who pulled her closer again, hugging her tightly. “I can’t feel him, Nes.” Elain pressed her face into Nesta’s shoulder, letting her tears fall. She felt safe, and she knew that Nesta would take care of her and, with her leg truly throbbing now, Elain wanted to just curl in on herself. 

“We will find him.” Nesta’s voice was strong, and Elain knew that her sister had been speaking to those nearby as much as she had been speaking to Elain herself. Elain nodded, swaying a little when Nesta loosened her hold on her, trying to see her face again. “You need to go inside and sit down.”

“I’m not going inside without Lucien.” Elain twisted to look back across the balcony, where faeries were milling about and where Feyre still stood with Rhys and Eris. “If I can’t look for him, I’ll stay here.” She adjusted her stance, trying to get her weight off her sore leg. “I’m not moving.”

“Sit, at least.” Nesta said, her voice firm, and Elain nodded, agreeing to that. She let her sister gently lower her to the ground, and she was thankful when Nesta sank down beside her, a warm arm wrapping around her back. Elain was still unable to help the tears from falling down her face but, at least from here, she was able to see as each new faerie was brought back up from down on the cliff. At least, each faerie who had been found alive.

“How many High Lords have been found?” Nesta asked, and Elain thought about it for a second. 

“Well, Rhys and Eris are right there, and they said that Kallias and Helion are inside, and that Tarquin and Thesan are okay… So…”

“Tamlin?” Nesta’s voice was soft and Elain met her eyes for a moment. 

“It was Sorcha.” Elain murmured, low enough that only Nesta would have heard her. “I know it was.” 

“Yes.” Nesta agreed, “I’ll bet she put faebane in those wine pitchers she put on the table.” Elain nodded slowly, looking around at her sister’s face. 

“There was other wine, though. Not everyone would have been dosed?” Elain’s eyes flicked around the balcony again. “Have you seen Sorcha since?”

“I haven’t seen her since that toast she made.” Nesta’s voice was as cold as ice, “Should have realised it then. She was just trying to get as many people to drink as possible and it needed time to take effect.”

Elain was only half listening to this, she was desperately trying to remember Lucien filling his goblet with wine. Had he taken from the same pitcher she had, or had he gone for a different one? “Nes, did you see if Lucien drank from our pitcher?”

“That is not something I was paying attention to.”

“If he didn’t…” Elain blinked, trying to swallow around the tears she felt building again, “He can winnow… and if he was okay he would have been back here by now. He would have found me.”

“Stop…” Nesta breathed. 

“Either he got dosed with faebane and he can’t get back, or he didn’t… and … he’s…”

“Elain, stop it.” Nesta said, “You don’t have any idea what has happened to him or where he is. You’re jumping to conclusions.”

“He would have come for me, Nes.” She said, “He wouldn’t leave me wondering.”

The pitying look that Nesta gave her then made Elain turn away and close her eyes to prevent more tears. Instead, she focused again on trying to reach for the bond, on trying to listen for any sound from Lucien, any faint flicker of a heartbeat. Her own heart sank when she still found nothing but silence. She didn’t know how she had coped with that silence before she had met him. The comforting rhythm of it had become such a part of her world, so constant and reliable, and a reminder that Lucien was hers. She didn’t want this silence, and she didn’t like it.


	151. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-One

**Chapter 151**

He couldn’t see. With a groan, Lucien lifted a hand to his head, trying to make sure that his eyes were open. Realising that his hair was in his face, he pushed it back and groaned again as that movement made his head throb. Reaching for his healing magic, he set a little of it to work. His head stopped throbbing and his vision cleared a little. Only then did he try to move. He was able to sit up, and he found that he was otherwise unharmed. He was surrounded by debris, and then he remembered the balcony giving way beneath him. He’d felt it a moment before it had happened, and he had only had a moment in which to react, he’d tried to reach for Elain but the table had been between them and he hadn’t had enough time to do anything else. Looking around, he couldn’t see her, although he was surrounded by others. Bodies, and faeries trying to move around, crying out for one another and screaming in pain. 

Lucien reached for Elain, for the bond, wanting to know where she was, and horror washed through him when there was nothing for him to take hold of. “No…” His stomach twisted and he thought he might throw up. “No…” Lucien felt as if a bucket of hot water had been dumped over his head. Heat and fear flooded him and he forced himself to his feet, swaying a little as his head tried to keep up with what he was doing. Looking around, he scanned for her honey-brown hair. For that green dress. “Elain?” he called, taking a few steps in one direction, and then turning and moving a little in the other. “Elain?”

His heart was thundering in his chest, and he knew that he was on the edge of panic. A flash of green caught his attention and he hurried toward it. It was a dress, he discovered, but the faerie wearing it was not Elain. He vaguely recognised her as one of Helion’s courtiers and she stared at him, her eyes pleading for help as Lucien realised she was pinned beneath some of the debris from the balcony. 

“Lucien, help me lift this?” He didn’t need to turn to look to recognise Tamlin’s voice, and Lucien just nodded, moving to grip the thing as best he could. He grunted with the effort it took for both of them to move the slap and then the faerie dragged herself from under it. She was crying in pain, and Tamlin bent to her while Lucien turned to scan again for Elain. 

He was trying his absolute hardest not to think about what the absence of the bond meant. He had been able to feel her, feel that connection, since the moment he had first looked into her eyes. He suspected he had felt the pull before she had even gone into the cauldron, but the absence of the bond now was gutting. It didn’t just go away. Not even distance had been able to diminish it. His mind kept coming so close to the logical reason for why he could not feel it now, but he wouldn’t let himself actually finish the thought. That was not an option, and he wouldn’t go there.

“Tam.” Lucien choked his old friend’s name out. When green eyes met his, Lucien half gestured at the long shelf of the cliff he had worked out they were on. “I can’t find Elain.”

Tamlin frowned for a moment. “She might not be here.” Green eyes went to the edge of the shelf, and then up. Lucien followed his gaze to see most of the balcony well above them had fallen away from the rest of the palace. “Her side of the table was further out than ours…” Lucien closed his eyes, wishing he didn’t understand that Tamlin was saying that she may have missed the shelf they’d landed on when falling. He looked again around them, trying to find anyone else who had been sitting near her. There was no sign of Feyre, Nesta or Eris. “We need to get everyone back up to the palace.” Tamlin said, “Help me.”

“I need to find Elain…”

“Lucien.”

Lucien shook his head, taking a step back from Tamlin. He could feel himself sliding closer to the edge of panic. “I need to find Elain.” He breathed, “I can’t feel her… _the bond is gone_ …” he could hear the panic in his voice now and that only made it worse. Tears welled in his good eye, “I have to…”

“ _Help me_.” Tamlin’s voice was a snarl, and Lucien didn’t know what to do. He _needed_ to find Elain, that was necessity, it wasn’t an option but, he knew, neither was leaving the others here, especially when he could see so many were hurt. “This shelf could go at any moment.”

Lucien glanced around again. “Okay…” he murmured, “Let’s free as many as we can, and we can winnow them up the cliff…” Tamlin gave a single nod and moved, while Lucien followed him. There was another large piece of the balcony with some of the table smashed over it, and it took them several minutes to lift it and shift it to the side. It wasn’t until it was out of the way that Lucien realised the faerie trapped beneath was already dead. He stared at the body for several moments, before looking up to meet Tamlin’s eyes. Without a word, they both moved on to the next. 

It took a good while to check for anyone still trapped, and then Lucien turned to Tamlin who had lifted a faerie to her feet, and arm around her waist to keep her upright. “Not directly onto the balcony.” Lucien said to him, “It might not be stable.”

“There was a large sitting room inside.” 

“That would work.” Lucien agreed an instant before Tamlin winnowed with the faerie. “Alright…” turning and moving toward the faerie in the green dress, Lucien bent to her. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, allowing him to lift her, and he winnowed the both of them to the sitting room that Tamlin had mentioned.

They found that the sitting room was already being used to help the injured and, sitting the faerie in the green dress on a chair, Lucien couldn’t help but scan the room for Elain. Not seeing her, he went straight back to the ledge to collect the next faerie, just as Tamlin was doing. The faster they competed this, the sooner he would be able to find his mate. Keeping himself to a busy routine would allow Lucien to keep himself from thinking too much about why he could no longer feel Elain, and he threw himself into his task. 

It only took them three trips up and back, and then Lucien strode for the door to the balcony, wanting to see just what was left of the thing and what was going on outside. As he came out the door, he saw Aelius landing with a faerie in his own arms and Lucien realised that the Peregryn was collecting others from down the cliff and that there had been other places that survivors had landed. He had taken barely three steps out onto the balcony when he saw Elain sitting on the ground with Nesta and his heart nearly beat its way out of his chest. “ _Elain_!”


	152. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Two

**Chapter 152**

Hearing Lucien’s voice, Elain whipped her head around. He was walking out onto the balcony, coming toward her, and her breath caught in her throat. “Lucien!” In an instant Elain was on her feet, her heart thundering, and she ignored the pain in her leg, as she lurched across the balcony toward him. “…Lucien.”

“Here.” He strode to meet her, and the tightness within Elain eased when Lucien’s arms came around her, enveloping her in his strong embrace. He held her tightly, and Elain slid her hands up to the back of his neck, pulling her head back just enough to try and look up at him. She heard his metallic eye click and whir as he looked her over, felt his hands moving up her back and over her, and then he’d brought his lips down to hers and Elain wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed him. 

“Petal…” Lucien broke the kiss well before Elain would have, and she met his eyes again as he looked at her. “Why can’t I feel the bond…?” he asked, frowning. “I can’t feel you… I… I thought…” both of his hands came up to caress her cheeks, his thumbs tracing her cheekbones. “But you’re here…”

“Yes…” Elain stared up at him, her own eyes taking in every detail of his face. “I can’t hear your heart.” Her voice hitched a little at the words, and she slid one of her hands down to settle over his heart. “Some of the wine was dosed with faebane.” She said softly, watching as anger slid behind his russet eye, “When I awoke and couldn’t hear you…” she rubbed her hand gently over his chest, “I panicked.”

“What…” he frowned, looking down at her, and she knew that he’d noticed her trying to keep her weight off of her sore leg. “Petal…?” bending, Lucien swept her up into his arms, holding her gently to himself, “What’s wrong with your leg?”

“Got a bit squished.” She breathed, one of her hands returning to his face. “I still can’t hear your heart…” she murmured, “It’s just… silent.” She was unable to help the tears welling in her eyes and, when she blinked, she felt them spill and fall. 

“It’ll come back.” He told her softly, “Faebane doesn’t last.” Elain nodded, closing her eyes when Lucien kissed the tears from her cheeks. “Are you alright, my love?” he asked, and she nodded again, opening her eyes to look at him. 

“Yes…” Elain brought her other hand up, now holding his face in both hands as she stared into his eyes. 

“Are you certain?” he asked, and she smiled, still staring at him. 

“Yes.” Her hands moved, stroking Lucien’s face as he held her. “It feels so strange to be able to touch you, and not hear your heart respond…”

“Trust me, Petal.” He breathed, turning with her in his arms, “It’s responding.” His eyes flicked to something nearby and Elain turned her head to find Nesta standing there, watching them. 

“We should go inside.” Her sister said and Lucien made a sound of agreement. “Rhys says that Helion wishes to speak with us in his private sitting room.”

“We’d better go, then.” Lucien’s voice was low and Elain looked up at him again to find his eyes on her. “You know I’m not putting you down…”

“She’s barely able to walk anyway.” Nesta said, and Elain watched as Lucien’s eyes shifted to her leg before returning to her face. 

“Are you in pain?” he asked, and she gave a light shrug. She was. Her leg hurt, but she didn’t want him to put her down. This was far better, and it made her far happier to be held by him. If she couldn’t feel him through the bond, couldn’t hear the reassuring thump of his heart, then she would keep the feel of his arms around her. “Petal?”

“I feel better with you holding me.”

She watched as he warred with himself internally, and she could see him battling with the choices before he nodded and strode after Nesta. Feyre appeared beside their eldest sister and Elain felt herself further relax, able to see the three people she cared most about in the world. It didn’t matter how much pain she was in, as long as her family was okay and she had Lucien, everything would be fine.

When they walked into Helion’s private study, Elain dragged her eyes away from her mate’s face and forced herself to look around the room. Helion and Ashk were sitting by a bookcase, and Tarquin and Thesan were nearby with Tamlin standing beside them. She saw Eris gesture to an armchair by the fire and Lucien moved toward his brother before gently setting Elain down in the chair. Not wanting to lose contact with him, Elain lifted one of her hands to close around Lucien’s wrist, not letting him go. 

“You wished to speak with us” Viviane’s voice asked from the doorway and Elain glanced around to see her walk into the room with Kallias and Rhys. 

“Yes.” Helion got to his feet, drawing himself to his full height, and Elain felt the tension in the room shift. There was wariness here. “I wish to inform you that what happened this evening was not of my design.”

“We didn’t think it was.” Rhys said, his voice careful. 

“Nevertheless.” Helion went on, “I wanted to assure you that everything will be done to ensure the ones responsible will be punished accordingly.”

“Have you found them?” Tarquin asked, his eyes on the High Lord of the Day Court. Helion seemed to shift, as if uncomfortable. 

“I have my suspicions, but…” he paused, “as yet, she is proving elusive.”

“It was that wretched Priestess, wasn’t it?” Viviane asked, “We knew she would do something awful…”

Elain did not miss Helion’s amber eyes flicking toward Lucien for an instant. “I apologise for not recognising sooner what was to happen…”

“We will help to locate the one responsible.” Eris said, “Let us know what we can do.”

“I have ordered a search of the Palace.” Helion said, standing straight again. “Those wishing to participate will assemble in the front entrance by the gate.”

Silently, Elain watched as Eris, Tarquin, Thesan, and Tamlin headed out the door. Viviane and Kallias moved out of their way and drew closer to the fire with Feyre and Rhys. When Helion gave a soft sigh and sank back into his chair beside Ashk, Elain watched as The Lady of the Autumn Court rubbed a soothing hand up and down his thigh and he lay a gentle hand atop hers. “This could have started a war.” The High Lord of the Day Court said, his voice weary, “Could have undone everything we’ve worked for.”

“Working together will help them feel united.” Lucien put in a moment before he went down on his knees beside Elain’s chair. Helion nodded, his eyes on his son. 

“Still, I should have recognised Sorcha for what she was.” His amber eyes flicked toward Elain, “I should have seen that she would target you.”

“Me?” Elain asked, “How do you know that she did?”

“That pitcher of wine was placed directly in front of you.” Nesta said, her voice cold. “She gave it to you.”

“Perhaps she also wished to prevent you seeing what she intended to do. She knows of your abilities…” Helion added. 

Lucien’s eyes were fierce when he looked again at Elain. She may not have been able to feel him through the bond, but she could tell that heat was flowing through him. That fire was in his eyes again, and his hair looked like molten metal. Gently, Elain brought a hand to his cheek, caressing him soothingly, and she watched as that fire softened to a gentle warmth. She just held his gaze as she felt Lucien slide a hand down her calf to her ankle, and then that warmth seemed to spread from his hand through her leg, consuming any and all pain that it came across.


	153. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Three

**Chapter 153**

Concentrating, Lucien ran his hands up and down Elain’s calves. Again and again, from ankle to knee and back, he pushed as much of his healing magic into her as he could. She had said that something had fallen on her and he couldn’t stop picturing the body of that faerie who had been crushed to death by the debris from the balcony. If something like that had fallen on Elain, then she was extremely lucky that she was alive. Also, he was afraid that she had other injuries which he could not see. The bruise on her leg and her pain had been evident, but that didn’t mean that was all that she was dealing with.

“Are you alright?” he asked, still on his knees before her, and his eyes on her face. 

“Yes.” Elain’s own eyes had been on the other side of the room, where Helion and Ashk sat, but she looked down at him, meeting Lucien’s anxious gaze. Lucien still could not stop his hands from moving over her, stroking and caressing.

“Are you certain?”

“My leg no longer hurts.”

He couldn’t stop running his hands over her, couldn’t stop touching her, and he couldn’t make himself move any further away, because then he wouldn’t be able to reach her, and he couldn’t have that. “Anything else?” he asked softly, and she shook her head, reaching one of her own hands out, her fingers brushing his cheek. Lucien nodded his acceptance, and sank down onto the plush rug, leaning his shoulder against her chair, and keeping one of his hands loosely around Elain’s ankle, as he returned his attention to the other conversation taking pace in the room. 

“Something has to be done.” Nesta sounded like she was on a knife’s edge, just about ready to slip and explode. 

“I assure you.” Helion replied, his voice clearly intended to soothe. “This will be taken seriously.”

“You can’t even find her.”

“We will.”

“How can you be sure? She could be long gone by now.”

“No.” Helion shook his head, and Nesta tilted her head, clearly waiting for an explanation. “Where would she have gone that would give her what she wants?”

“I don’t know?” Nesta replied, “She probably wanted to avoid punishment.”

“She wants power.” Lucien put in, his gaze sliding from Helion to Nesta. Those blue-grey eyes fixed on him, steely as ever. “It’s unlikely that she’s even left.”

“Oh?” there was a clear challenge in her voice then and Lucien nodded.

“My take,” he began, “is that she wanted to prevent Elain from seeing anything of what was to come, the balcony or any of it. She laced the wine in front of her with faebane so that her magic would be affected. She wanted others to be helpless too, so that she would be able to do more.” He saw Nesta narrow her eyes, and he went on to clarify, “Sorcha, I would wager, wished to make herself invaluable in the rebuilding and dealing with the aftermath…”

“Then where is she?” This was Feyre and Lucien shook his head. 

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe she’s dead?” Rhys asked, and Lucien flicked a glance at him. 

“I doubt,” Helion put in “that Sorcha was able to do this alone.”

“Which means…” Rhys replied, “That you have a problem.”

“Yes.” Helion sighed, and Lucien watched as his mother took the High Lord’s hand, “I hadn’t thought anyone in my Court would have been capable of such a thing, let alone had the desire for it.” Helion’s amber eyes flicked around the room. “I had thought everyone was content.”

“There will always be those who want more.” Ashk said gently, “And they can all too easily be persuaded to do any number of things for it.” Lucien supposed that his mother had seen more than her share of that type of Court manoeuvring in the Autumn Court. He had certainly seen enough of it in his own time there.

“Did she really think,” Feyre muttered, “that drugging and killing Elain would get her the power she desired?”

“Wasn’t just Elain she wanted to kill.” Nesta said softly, “Although I have no doubt if she had have done that, she would have flung herself at Lucien as soon as possible.” Lucien raised an eyebrow at Nesta who went on, “I’ll bet that she was hoping to kill enough of the Court to create holes and opportunities for herself.”

“She wanted to be a key supporter in the rebuilding.” Lucien agreed, “She would have thought she could rise within the Court.” He turned his head when he felt one of Elain’s hands slide into his hair. She was frowning as she looked at him. “Petal?” he murmured, voice low enough so that only she would hear him. 

“It’s nothing.” She breathed.

“Doesn’t look like nothing.”

“Just the thought of her trying to come after you… once I was dead…”

“She would have found her endeavour unsuccessful.” He told her and she tilted her head. “She’s mad to think that I could ever want another after I’ve loved you.”

Elain’s pretty lips curved in a gentle smile, and Lucien ran his fingers from her ankle, slowly up her calf, his eyes lifting to meet her brown. 

“Silky court-trained charmer…” she purred and Lucien smiled widely. 

“You can thank my mother for that.”

“Ah…” Elain’s eyes flicked across the room before looking back to Lucien and shaking her head, “I don’t think that I will.” She replied gently, “At least, not right now.” She sat back in her chair and Lucien watched her resist a yawn. 

Running his hand up and down her calf again, he turned his gaze back to the others. Kallias had slid an arm around Viviane, who was resting back against him, and even Nesta had allowed herself to sink into a comfortable looking chair. It seemed as if Helion had noticed the same thing because he lifted a hand to call an end to any latent conversations. 

“The search will continue until Sorcha and anyone assisting her are found. It is late, however, so the rest of you may retire for the evening.” He got to his feet, “If you do, I would urge caution. Just be aware of what is happening around you until those who mean us harm have been caught.”

“I could do with a bath.” Viviane agreed, pushing away from Kallias and standing straight. Lucien watched her turn to her mate, holding a hand out to him. 

“That does sound good.” Elain’s soft voice made Lucien turn to look at her. He got to his feet then, holding his own hand out to her. “Thank you.” Elain allowed him to pull her to her feet and he made sure he was ready to catch her at the slightest sign of discomfort. She seemed steady enough, however and he smiled when one of her hands came to rest on his arm. 

“Are you alright?” he asked and she nodded. Lucien took her hand, bringing it to her lips, pleased when he saw her blush at his actions and glance around them to see if anybody else had been watching. “Let’s get you that bath.” He said and she smiled before looking toward her sisters. 

“I’ll see you in the morning.” She said to them and Lucien only heard Feyre’s and Nesta’s soft murmured responses before Elain had moved toward him, wrapping an arm around his waist. He was unable to help himself, pulling her tightly against his body as he turned them for the door. Sparing a quick glance over his shoulder, he saw his mother get to her feet, her own eyes on Helion, and Lucien figured they would both be fine. No doubt the High Lord of the Day Court would return to his makeshift infirmary and see to those who were still injured before he retired for the night. But, seeing as that was not his duty, Lucien cared now for nothing except taking care of Elain. He was keen to get her into a warm bath, and then reassure himself that she was truly no longer injured by inspecting every inch of her he could find.


	154. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Four

**Chapter 154**

Watching the water fill the bathtub, Elain let her mind go over everything that had happened that evening. It seemed so long ago that she and Lucien had been teasing one another and getting ready for dinner, and she let out a weary sigh. It had been a long evening.

“Petal?” the door to the bathroom creaked a little, and Elain heard Lucien’s soft footsteps as he entered the room. Not his heartbeat, though. The faebane was still very much in her system, and Elain hoped that it was gone soon because she wanted the bond back. “Are you alright?” It hadn’t escaped Elain’s notice that he kept asking her that question and she turned to him, nodding her head. He crossed the room to her, stopping when he was close enough to touch her, and Elain lifted one of her own hands, bringing it to his cheek. 

“I miss the bond.” She breathed, “I miss being able to hear your heart, I miss being able to feel you…”

“It will come back.” He replied, “I promise.”

“I know.” Elain ran her fingers down his cheek, over his scar, tracing it from his brow to his jaw. She didn’t want to take her hands off of him, some part of her fearing that if she couldn’t touch him she would lose him, unable to find him without the bond. She watched as he glanced at the bathtub behind her, and then lifted his eyes, both russet and gold, to her face. 

Lucien’s hands were trembling slightly when they moved to begin loosening her dress. Elain just watched his face, letting him trace his hands over her. At first she thought that he was simply fumbling as he tried to get the dress off of her, but then she realised that, as his hands moved carefully over her skin, he was trying to check her over. “I’m alright.” She told him, sliding her own hand up into his hair, “Lucien, I’m fine.”

“I just wanted to be certain.” He replied, lifting her dress and folding it over his arm. Elain cast a regretful look at the dress. She really had liked it. “It’s not damaged.” He said gently, having evidently seen her look. “I’ll have it cleaned for you…” She nodded and gave him a small smile.

When Lucien turned to hang the dress on a hook, Elain stepped into the tub, sinking down into the heat with a pleased sigh. He returned to the edge of the tub, sinking down to look at her and Elain raised an eyebrow. “Are you not going to join me?” she asked, and he tilted his head. 

“Do you wish me to?”

“Yes.” She just watched as he stood and removed his own clothing before stepping into the tub with her. Elain shifted and got to her knees, shuffling closer to him and then sinking down against him. When Lucien wrapped his arms around her, she leaned into his chest, laying against him and closing her eyes as she allowed the heat to soak into her, relaxing her. 

“Tell me what happened to you.” His voice was soft, and Elain was silent for several moments. With her ear pressed to Lucien’s chest, she could just make out the soft thud of his heartbeat and she was reluctant to lose that. One of his hands moved slowly up and down her back, bringing hot water with it and she let out a soft breath and nodded a little. 

“When it all fell,” she murmured, feeling the way that Lucien drew a slow breath, trying to keep himself steady as he listened to her, “I ended up on a little ledge maybe about halfway down the cliff. Eris was there…” Elain felt Lucien’s hand still against her back. “He lifted the thing that had landed on my leg off of me…” she looked up at her mate then, “And I realised that I couldn’t hear your heart.” Laying her cheek against his chest again she continued, “I don’t suppose I reacted well. Eris tried to calm me down. Then Aelius found us. Eris made him take me first, and nobody up on the balcony had seen you… I stayed with Nesta…” Letting out a huff of breath, she fell silent. That had more or less been what happened. 

“I am sorry that I couldn’t find you sooner.”

Elain shook her head as much as she was able, still laying against him. “I have you now.”

“It was much the same for me.” He told her, “Although where I landed there were many others. Tamlin and I tried to get as many as we could back up the cliff, but some were already dead.”

“I wonder how many died.”

“I suppose we will find out tomorrow.” Lucien’s hand moved over her back again and Elain resisted a yawn. “Do you want to go to bed, Petal?”

“Yes.” She pushed herself up and reached for a nearby towel. It did not escape her notice when Lucien’s hands followed her as she stood and she smiled gently to herself when he quickly followed her. She was tired but, after everything that had happened, she definitely wanted to keep him close to her. 

Having dried herself off before she’d reached the bed, Elain tossed her towel over the chair by the window and slipped beneath the covers. A slight dip in the mattress an instant later told her that Lucien had followed her. When the fire in the fireplace suddenly burst to light, Elain realised that Lucien had done it, and she shuffled closer to him, able to see him now in the dim, flickering light. He wrapped her in his arms immediately, and she felt his lips brush her forehead as he half rolled over her. 

When he yawned, Elain threaded her fingers into his hair. “You must be exhausted.” She breathed, “You winnowed up and down that cliff, rescuing people… and then you healed me…” He must have nearly drained himself in the last few hours. “You need rest…” He nodded then and Elain smiled gently at him before turning onto her side and pressing her back against him. One of his arms came around her waist and she let out a slow breath, trying to match her breathing to his.

“I love you.” His words, murmured against her ear, sent warm shivers through Elain and she smiled. With her back pressed against his firm chest, and his arms around her, she felt entirely safe and secure, and she told him so. His lips brushed against her ear and then moved to the back of her neck, and Elain’s eyes closed in pleasure. Reaching back, wanting to touch him, she did not expect to find him completely hard. 

“Lucien?”

“Sorry….” He breathed, and she felt him shift slightly behind her. 

“No…” turning her head to look over her shoulder, she met his eyes in the soft light. “I want you.”

“You’re exhausted, Petal.”

“So are you.” She slowly stroked him, enjoying how he bit back a groan, “It’s not about that. It’s … It’s…” she didn’t know how to explain what she wanted. “I can’t hear your heart… I can’t feel the bond…” Elain swallowed thickly, “I… want to feel you…”

Lucien’s hand slid down Elain’s thigh, and she knew that he understood. She let him carefully lift that leg, and then she felt him pressing against her, in just the right place. When his lips returned to the back of Elain’s neck, she braced herself, knowing what was to come. Then, as he so very slowly pushed himself inside of her, she allowed herself a quiet whimper. 

Lucien was still for the longest time and Elain had almost wondered if he had fallen asleep, but then his hips moved and she bit her lip, her hand still reaching around behind herself. She let that hand settle against Lucien’s thigh, urging him to move again, and he did so. Holding her leg up and holding her open with one hand, every other movement that Lucien made was so very slow and tender. Every breath was deliberate, and Elain realised that this was about the connection for both of them. They needed to feel that with one another, while missing the bond, and facing that blank emptiness, especially after what had happened that evening. This was how they clung to some form of connection between them. 

Every time Lucien pushed deeper inside of her, Elain could almost imagine that she could hear his heartbeat, and she tried to convince herself that it had matched to hers. She kept herself pressed firmly back against his chest, listening to his breathing, and enjoying the way that he had begun to breathe her name against the back of her neck. 

Exhaustion continued to creep up on Elain and she allowed it to happen. Bringing her hand back around in front of her, she grasped a hold of the bedspread, trying to balance herself as Lucien continued his careful movements. Even her soft whimpers had begun to fade as her eyes closed and she focused on the soft, careful rhythm, so very like a heartbeat.


	155. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Five

**Chapter 155**

Movement in the darkness, and Elain opened her eyes to find that she couldn’t see anything. The embers in the fireplace had burned too low, and there wasn’t even enough of a glow to cast shadows. Turning her head, Elain realised that she was now on her back and, with another shuffling noise, she realised that Lucien had moved over her. She lifted one of her hands, bringing it out from under the covers, and found his shoulder in the dark as his weight settled over her. 

“What are you doing? She murmured, trying to free her other hand from beneath the covers. His only response was to kiss her. She was still unable to hear his heartbeat, or feel him though the bond. Unable to see in the darkness, the only reason that she was even able to tell this was Lucien was by his scent, and the familiar way that his hands moved over her. When those hands slid down to adjust her beneath himself, Elain tightened her hand on his shoulder. “Lucien?”

She could feel him firm against her and, when his hot mouth moved to her throat, Elain closed her eyes when his hands slid down her thighs to catch behind her knees. Lucien lifted Elain’s knees, pulling them high and wide, and she felt her pulse quicken as he positioned himself over her. He paused there, lips stilling on her throat, and Elain knew that he was waiting for her. Hooking one of her feet around behind Lucien’s leg, she slid her left hand down his back, coming to rest at his hip, and he took it for the encouragement it was. 

Elain bit her lip at the feel of Lucien’s teeth, gentle against her throat, and then he had pushed the full length of himself inside of her. Her right hand gripped his shoulder tightly as she gave a small grunt, unable to move with the way he was pinning her beneath himself. She had expected him to be still for a moment, as he usually was, but his hands gripped her hips, holding her in place as he withdrew and thrust again. Elain gasped, heat flooding her. She felt him shudder slightly, heard his soft groan in her ear, before he repeated the action, settling into a quick rhythm. 

Elain clung to him, one hand on his shoulder, the other at his back. She was still unable to see anything in the darkness, and without the bond letting her know what Lucien was feeling, she had no idea what this was. She was so used to being able to reach for the bond, and have some indication of what was going on inside of him, but there was nothing there now. It was as black and empty as the darkness around her, and all that she could feel was herself. There was only the weight of him over her, pressing her into the mattress, the brush of his lips at her throat, and the feel of him moving quickly, determinedly inside her. 

Heat was flaring within Elain, burning wherever Lucien’s skin touched hers, and she felt her breath begin to hitch. One of his hands left her hip and came up to her cheek. He brushed his fingers gently along her cheekbone before he took a handful of her hair, holding tightly. Elain stroked his back as gently as she were able, and he loosened his grip slightly. Her entire body flushed with heat, and Elain gasped again when Lucien’s rhythm shifted. She heard him groan before he began panting heavily against her ear, and his strokes began to lengthen. She knew that he’d reached his peak when he gave a choked cry, shuddering over her before going still. 

Lucien didn’t collapse down over her, but rather pushed himself to the side, and Elain took a deep breath, trying to steady herself as she turned her head in his direction, still unable to see. She could hear him, still breathing heavily, and she reached a hand out, looking for him. The moment she touched him, Elain burst into tears. 

*

“Petal?” the sound of Elain’s tears sent fear spearing through Lucien and he pushed himself up onto his elbow, a small ball of flame igniting by the bedhead, and hovering there so that he could see. “What is it?” he asked, reaching out to her, “Did I hurt you?” She just cried, one of her hands over her face, so that he couldn’t see, and Lucien slid closer. “Petal…?”

“No…” the word was so small and soft, that Lucien barely heard it, but he slid an arm around her waist, and drew her to himself. 

“I didn’t hurt you?” he asked, and she shook her head. “Then what did I do?” he asked, his fingers caressing her soft skin, “I’m sorry for it…”

“You didn’t do anything.” She murmured, and he wondered if that were true. He’d finished inside of her well before he had intended, and it hadn’t escaped his notice that she had not. He had other ways of getting her there though, and he had intended to use them. “I… I just… I feel lost.” She breathed, her head tucked up under his chin, “I feel lost not being able to reach for the bond and know how you feel.” He shivered as one of her hands moved across his chest to his shoulder, “That was… different… without the bond, without that insight…”

Lucien froze. It hadn’t occurred to him that, aside from last night and the gentle touches he had given her then, every other time they had been together Elain had had access to the bond. She had always been able to feel his desire, his need for her. How had she felt without that? “Did you not like it without the bond…?” he sounded as uncertain as he felt. 

“It’s not that.” She replied, and he felt her tilt her head to look up at him. “It just felt like something was missing. I felt the absence of it.”

“Yes.” He knew that he had as well, but he hadn’t given it much thought, having awoken in the dark with a driving need to reassure himself that he had found Elain again after that balcony had fallen, after he had seen faeries crushed to death beneath it. 

“The silence in my head where your heartbeat usually is is deafening.”

“Here…” Lucien wrapped his fingers around one of Elain’s wrists and lifted her hand. Carefully, he pressed her fingers to his throat, right where he knew she would be able to feel his pulse. After a few moments, he heard her gasp. “You feel it?” he asked, and she nodded. 

“Yes…” she shifted then, settling herself against him, her other arm draped over his side as her fingers remained at his throat. 

“Alright…” Lucien pressed his lips to Elain’s forehead. “You stay there like that. Keep your fingers there…” he ran a hand down her side to her thigh, before pulling it up and over himself so that he could slide his hand between her legs. Her soft gasp set his pulse racing and he knew by the small amused sound that she made then that she had noticed. “I’m going to finish what I started earlier…”

Elain tilted her head up so that she could look at him again, and Lucien met her gaze. Her fingers stayed firmly at his throat so that she could track his pulse, and he smiled at her as he set about seeing just how many appreciative sounds he could draw from her with his fingers.


	156. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Six

**Chapter 156**

When Elain opened her eyes in the morning, the first thing she noticed was Lucien’s heartbeat. He was laying beside her, his red hair splayed out across his pillow, and Elain gripped his arm, grinning as she pulled herself up. He began to stir and Elain climbed over him, looking down at him when he opened his eyes, blinking in the light. 

“Mmm…” he groaned, lifting a hand to rub a his face. “Petal?”

“Good morning.” She was still grinning, and she brushed her fingers through his hair, smoothing it down. Watching him, Elain saw the moment that he noticed the bond. 

“I… can…” he paused, looking up at her and she nodded, her grin even more wide than before. Lucien smiled back at her, his fingers tracing up her arm to her shoulder. “Can you?”

“Yes!” Elain bent forward, pressing her lips to his as both her hands went to his face, “Oh, yes.” She listened with joy as she heart his heartbeat quicken, and pleasure flushed through him, meeting her down the bond. Relief hit her next, and Elain embraced it, seeking to deepen the kiss. Lucien’s arms wrapped around her, pulling her down against himself as he responded to her kiss, and she gave a soft groan as heat filled her. 

“Didn’t I tell you it would come back?” he smiled at her when she eventually lifted her head to look at him, and Elain nodded.

“You did.” 

Meeting his eyes, Elain held Lucien’s gaze as he reached up to tuck a lock of her hair behind her ear. With her chest pressed against his, Elain took great joy in the fact that she could feel his heart beating in his chest as well as hear it in her head. “It does feel much better, doesn’t it?” he said gently, and Elain nodded her head. 

“Much more right.” She agreed. Then, remembering what Ashk had promised her before the balcony had collapsed the night before, she was unable to help another smile. Helion had said that the suite he had been preparing for them was ready, and Ashk had promised to show it to her. 

“Are you smiling at something in particular?” Lucien asked, raising an eyebrow and Elain tilted her head as she looked at him. 

“What would I possibly be smiling about?” 

“Well, I don’t know, Petal.” There was a soft purr to Lucien’s voice now, and Elain felt one of his hands sliding up her back. “Could be that you’ve managed to pin a handsome Fae Lord beneath you in bed…”

“Oh?” She made a show of looking him over, “And what would I do with such a male?”

“Whatever you fancied.”

“Maybe…” Elain breathed, leaning forward again, “maybe I just want to lay here and listen to your heart.”

“Ah…” When Lucien’s fingers threaded their way into Elain’s hair she closed her eyes. She could feel his longing and she pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Unfortunately, I don’t think we could get away hiding in here all day.”

“No, I suppose not.” There would be much to be done today after what had happened last night. “I wonder if they found Sorcha.”

“I guess we will find out.” His fingers moved through her hair, and Elain enjoyed his fingers moving against her scalp. “We have about an hour before breakfast.” He said, glancing at the window. 

“Is that some fancy Day Court power?” she asked, her own eyes going to the window and taking in the sunshine. 

“Maybe.” He replied, “But… it does give us some time.” One of his hands, slid down the back of her neck, “Time to just lay here…” she heard his heart settle into a steady rhythm and she nodded. 

“Yes…” Laying her cheek against Lucien’s chest, Elain released a deep breath. “Such a strong heart…” she murmured, and heard him give a soft chuckle in response. 

Getting comfortable, Elain stayed where she was, just listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. She hoped that she never came across faebane ever again, as she never wanted to be without the reassuring presence of that steady rhythm. Lucien’s hand was moving slowly up and down her back, and, after a few moments she realised that he had been speaking to her. “Sorry?” she asked, glancing up at his face. 

“What are you thinking about?”

“Oh.” Elain smiled at him, “I was hoping that I never have to deal with faebane again.” His hand kept moving up and down her back. “I never thought I would be here…” she went on, “I used to wonder if the fae rode toads around and caught lifts with sparrows…”

Lucien laughed and she felt his lips brush against her forehead. “They must have been some large sparrows…”

“I’ve seen Cassian.” She replied, “Not convinced I was wrong.”

The choking sound that Lucien made then had Elain grinning and she pushed herself up to meet his eyes. “Who would be more offended by that?” he asked, “Cassian or Nesta?”

“Ohhh…” Elain smirked, “Don’t tell either one.”

“I want to tell both.” He replied, “Just to see what happens…”

“You want me murdered?” she asked, and he shook his head. 

“I would protect you.”

“Well, I don’t want you murdered.”

“That, Petal…” Lucien smiled, “Is good to know.”

“Ah.” Elain kissed him and then pushed herself up and off of him. “It’s probably time to get up.” She said, “I would very much prefer to bathe before seeing anyone else.” She remembered the last time she had gone knocking on Helion’s door and he had scented her. Lucien murmured his agreement and followed her toward the bathroom. 

Setting about filling the tub with hot water, Elain moved around the room, collecting the things she would be wearing for the day, and thinking about what she would be prioritising. She figured that when they got to breakfast, they would be informed of what had happened during the night. Any news of Sorcha would no doubt be the first thing on everyone’s minds, and Elain would definitely want to see if everyone had been healed. There would, of course, be the issue of what to do with those who had died. She also very much wished to go with Ashk to have a look at the suite Helion had prepared for herself and Lucien.

When she returned to the tub and dipped her hand in to test the water, Elain began to wonder what kind of suite it might be. What would Helion have deemed necessary for them during the mating frenzy? No doubt there would be a bed. That was a given. What else would they need? There would clearly be a bathroom, and he had mentioned food. It would be good to have food in there so that they wouldn’t need to leave the suite, and nobody would have to come and bring them anything. A self-sufficient suite would be safest. They needed other things in there as well, though. Elain knew that the frenzy was usually fairly intense, but she didn’t suppose they would be having sex the whole time. That seemed excessive. And exhausting. 

“Petal?” Lucien’s voice sounded amused, and she realised that he had been tugging on the bond. Had he somehow gleaned a little of what she had been thinking? She felt herself blush as she glanced at him. 

“Yes?”

She saw the moment he decided to let it go and he gestured at the bathtub. “Are you getting in?”

“Of course.” Elain stepped into the hot water, glancing at him when he did the same. When she sank down into the water, Lucien moving with her, Elain felt his hand come to rest on the back of her neck and she leaned into him, listening to the way his heart beat, steady and sure. It was, she had decided, her very favourite sound.


	157. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Seven

**Chapter 157**

The moment that he and Elain entered the hall for breakfast, Lucien knew that something had happened. The hushed whispers and tense expressions would have given it away, even without the odd tension in the air. He felt Elain’s surprise down the bond and knew that she had noticed something herself, but she smiled and said nothing as she approached the table to sit beside her sisters. Striding after her, Lucien put his own courtly mask in place as he took up a seat at the table.

“How do you feel this morning?” Feyre asked her sister and Lucien saw Elain smile widely out of the corner of his eye.

“Much better.” Elain said brightly. 

When we woke up this morning,” Feyre began, “we discovered the faebane was gone.”

“Yes.” Elain nodded and Lucien smiled at her, “It was the first thing I noticed when I awoke, too.”

“You can hear Lucien’s heart again?” Nesta asked, her voice low and Elain nodded. He watched Nesta’s blue-grey eyes shift from Elain to him and he raised an eyebrow at her. She just looked him over before nodding, her eyes returning to her sister as her expression softened. “You feel better?”

“Much.” Elain smiled at her elder sister, before selecting several pieces of fruit from the table, placing them on her own plate with care.

When Helion sat down nearby, Lucien turned his attention to the High Lord. He was hoping to get some clue as to what had happened, and he was unsure if he was able to just ask. Would Helion tell him? Was that his place? He glanced at Elain when her hand came to rest on his knee under the table, and she gave him an encouraging nod. He knew that she thought he should speak up, and he figured that he might as well. 

“So…” he began, clearing his throat a little. Helion’s amber eyes turned his way, and Lucien met his gaze. “What happened during the night?”

Everyone’s eyes turned toward him and then the High Lord of the Day Court as Helion leaned back in his chair. “We found Sorcha.” He replied, “She was working in one of the makeshift infirmaries.” 

“Makes sense.” Lucien replied, figuring that they had guessed that the priestess would have wanted to make herself useful in the clean-up.

“Yes.” Helion inclined his head. “She was questioned.” He gave a sigh, raising a hand to run through his black hair. “Once she realised that we had worked out what she had done, she admitted to it.”

“She what?” Nesta asked, her eyes narrowed. Helion nodded his head. 

“She would not,” he went on, “tell us who helped her. But it is clear that she had acquired the assistance of some of the lesser fae with abilities to work with stone.”

Lucien sat back in his own seat at that. “And where are they?”

“She claims that they left the court.”

“Do you believe her?”

“It seems likely.”

“What is to be done with her?” This was Feyre and, when looking at the expression on her face, Lucien was glad that his friend wasn’t currently turning her wrath on him.

“I wish to speak with her some more.” Helion replied, “Then, I will decide what our course of action will be.”

Lucien eyed the High Lord of the Day Court. As the incident had been an attack on all of the High Lords, and all of the Courts, the solution would have to have input from all of them as well. No doubt Helion needed time to think about how he was to handle it. It still could, Lucien supposed, lead to war. 

He knew that Helion had his own counsel, but Lucien wondered if perhaps the High Lord would appreciate another viewpoint. “If… you wish to… discuss…” Helion’s eyes went directly to Lucien who winced internally at how uncertain he sounded. He had always been able to do this. He had spent centuries playing all kinds of games in the various Courts across Prythian. It was ridiculous that he now struggled to ask Helion if he would like to have a conversation. 

“The counsel of my son will always be welcome.”

Blinking, Lucien stared at him for a moment before nodding. 

“Speaking of that…” Rhys’ voice drawled, and Lucien turned his attention to the High Lord of the Night Court. “Given that you’re now the recognised son of the Day Court, I feel that I have to release you from your obligations to my Court.” Rhys’ violet eyes held Lucien’s and Lucien inclined his head slightly. He had been expecting that. He understood that it wasn’t as if Rhys had thought he’d be doing a bad job or somehow betray the Night Court, but rather he was being freed to be able to properly fulfil his duties to the Day Court as he had been named Heir. “I do know how busy you will be.”

“I thank you for the job while you had need of me…” Lucien replied and Rhys smiled at him. 

“And while you had need of the job.” The High Lord said, “I do thank you for your efforts, and the detail you put into what I asked you to do.”

This time Lucien smiled at Rhys. “I put effort and attention into everything I do.” Elain choked on her tea beside him, and Lucien smiled even wider, his eyes still on Rhys. Feyre made a face and rolled her eyes, and Lucien’s smile only faded when he felt his mother’s eyes firmly on him. 

He tried to behave himself for the rest of breakfast, managing quite well he thought. At least, above the table. Where nobody could see, Lucien’s hand had made its way to Elain’s knee beneath the table, and then up her thigh. He had been impressed with the way that she had managed to control her expression, and he doubted that anyone would have guessed what he was doing beneath the table and out of sight. 

When his fingers slid a little higher, Elain jumped slightly however, and Lucien knew that he’d reached her limit. She was okay with him touching her, and being a little cheeky in public, but she wasn’t about to do anything actually lewd at the breakfast table in front of everybody. He caught the sideways glance she gave him out of the corner of her eye, and he gave her an acknowledging smile before sliding his hand back down her thigh to her knee. One of Elain’s hands went beneath the table then and he allowed her to lace their fingers together when her hand settled over his own. 

“Lucien,” Helion’s voice drew his attention once more, and Lucien watched his father think for a moment, “I intend to check on those who were injured first after we finish here, and then I will go to speak once more with Sorcha. If you would like to accompany me…”

“Of course.” Lucien replied, placing his cutlery gently on his empty plate. “I am ready when you are.”

“Who’s ready for what?” 

Frowning as he recognised that voice, Lucien turned in his chair to watch as the Illyrian walked through the door. “Cassian?” Rhys sounded almost confused. “What are you doing here?”

“Nesta invited me.”

“Uh…” Lucien turned his eyes on Nesta who was staring at Cassian, her own eyes narrowed.

“Did you just?” Lucien asked and she turned her eyes on him, glaring. 

“I… told him what happened yesterday.” She murmured.

“And asked me to come.” Cassian added. “So, here I am.”

“I see.” Lucien’s eyes remained on Nesta and he felt slight amusement down the bond from Elain who was grinning at her sister. He thought he understood what had happened. Nesta had been shaken by the events of last night and she had thought that if Cassian were to come to the Day Court then she would have more security and would be better protected. Lucien rather thought that she was right. 

“I just thought…” Nesta said, her voice more uncertain than Lucien had ever heard it, “If Sorcha hadn’t been found, then Cassian could have helped…” she broke off and actually blushed. 

Elain and Feyre looked so very amused and Lucien found himself wishing that he could have sat at the table and enjoyed the rest of it, but then Helion got to his feet. “Cassian, of course, you are welcome to the Day Court. Excuse me, however, Lucien and I have somewhere to be.”

Lucien got to his feet, brushing his fingers gently up Elain’s arm as he did so. She looked up at him as he stood and he bent to press a quick kiss to her forehead. “I’ll see you later, Petal.”

Her brown eyes went from him to Helion and back again and Lucien watched her smile as she nodded. “See you for lunch.” She replied, her smile still firmly in place as he took several steps away from the table and went to follow Helion out of the door. He caught a quick glimpse of Cassian taking up his recently vacated chair before the door swung closed and he returned his attention to Helion.


	158. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Eight

**Chapter 158**

Elain had never seen Nesta so embarrassed. Her elder sister kept glancing at Cassian and then back to her plate, colour high in her cheeks, and Elain loved it. Cassian had seated himself beside Elain, in Lucien’s recently vacated seat, and had begun talking almost immediately about the things he had seen that morning around the Day Court, and it was evident that he was speaking just to fill the awkward silence as Nesta hadn’t said a word since he’d sat down. 

“I have to say, though.” Cassian announced, and Elain watched as he grinned Nesta’s way. “I was kind of hoping for a kiss by way of greeting.”

“Uh…” Nesta went even more red, the blush working its way down her elegant throat. She narrowed her eyes at the Illyrian then when he went on. 

“From anyone… really… anyone at all…”

“Well,” Rhys muttered, “I hope you sort that out, because I’m certainly not kissing you.”

“Feyre will.” Cassian said, arrogance dripping from his voice. 

“Feyre will not.” Feyre replied flatly. Cassian pouted and turned his eyes on Elain, although she saw him glance quickly at Nesta. 

“How about you?” he asked, and Elain made a face. “No?” he asked, leaning toward her to present his cheek.

“No…” she grinned.

“Stop it.” Nesta muttered, “Nobody is kissing you but me.” Elain’s eyes widened as she looked at her sister again and she watched as Nesta somehow turned even more red. “I… mean…”

“I know what you meant.” Cassian snickered, and Elain resisted a laugh, watching as Nesta sank lower in her chair as if wishing she would melt under the table.

Looking up when Ashk appeared beside her, Elain smiled. “Would you like me to show you what we discussed?” the Lady of the Autumn Court asked, her voice warm and gentle. 

“Yes, that would be lovely.” Elain replied, pushing her chair back and getting to her feet. Happiness and a small spark of excitement passed across the other faerie’s face, and Elain smiled at her. 

“I am certain you will like it.”

“I’m sure I will.” Elain gave a small wave to her sisters and the others at the table as she turned and followed Ashk out the door and into the hallway. They walked silently, and Elain could still sense the excitement coming off of Ashk, and she couldn’t help smiling. Elain began to wonder just how long Ashk had been waiting for her son to find his mate. “Did… you help Helion set it up?” she asked, eyeing her out of the corner of her eye.

“I might have discussed some things with him.”

Elain smiled again and then they had turned down a new corridor. She hadn’t been to this part of the palace before, and she tried to pay attention to where they were going, hoping that she would be able to find her way back again. By the time they stopped before a pair of large ornate doors, Elain was trying to cement the mental map in her mind. She traced her finger over some of the pattern in the doors, realising that it was a large sun. “This is it?” she asked, and Ashk nodded. 

“This is it.”

“Oh…” Elain hesitated, suddenly nervous about opening the door and going inside. “Okay…” her hand rested on the handle and she bit her lower lip, trying to imagine what would be on the other side. She glanced again at Ashk who was watching her with a gentle smile. “Okay…” Drawing a deep breath, in the hopes of steadying herself, Elain turned the handle and pushed the doors open. 

There were more suns. That was the first thing that she noticed. There were suns on the walls and on the roof, and mostly everything was golden. “Wow…” she murmured, taking several steps into the room and stopping to look around. Low on the walls there were flowers, and Elain tilted her head. More flowers decorated the bedspread and the cushions on the low couch by the window, and she turned to smile at Ashk. “This is lovely.”

“Take a closer look…” Ashk gestured further into the rooms, and Elain moved forward. There were several couches in the entrance, curshions and throw rugs sitting neatly, and a small table before them. Moving past that, Elain looked at the large bed. Golden bedspread, covered in vibrant wildflowers embroidered across it, more pillows and cushions covering the whole thing. She ran a hand gently over the heavy wooden bedframe as her eyes went to the windows. “There’s a door here…”

Elain followed Ashk to the door and watched as the other faerie opened it. They walked out into a small courtyard and Elain gasped. She had not expected a garden. “This is…”

“You will not want to spend your entire time inside.”

“I should hope not.” Elain looked at the small section of grass lined with flowerbeds and then lifted her eyes to the young trees which stood by the wall. She knew that she would definitely be spending time with Lucien out here. It was such a little space, but it was so pleasant and relaxing. 

“Come…” Ashk linked her arm through Elain’s and took her back inside, closing and latching the door after them. “There’s a kitchen.”

“Of course.” Elain murmured. “Wouldn’t want to accidentally kill anyone whose job it was to bring us food…”

“Yes.” Ashk nodded. “These things have happened.”

“Do you really think Lucien would…” Elain slanted a glance at her mate’s mother and Ashk tilted her head. 

“It is difficult to say.” She replied softly, “When the frenzy takes over…there is not a whole lot of control.”

“But…” Elain paused, “He… will… still… be… _him_ … right?”

“Yes.” Ashk said, “but, remember, part of him _is_ protective and territorial of his mate.” Ashk smiled at her, “He has felt that way about you since the bond snapped into place.”

Nodding, Elain let those words sink in. She had known that. She had even become accustomed to it, she realised, thinking about the way that Lucien sometimes got when they were together. She thought about the way his hands would sometimes tighten on her, especially after something had happened or when they had been apart. He was often possessive. 

When she looked at Ashk again, the Lady of the Autumn Court smiled at her and then pulled open a cupboard. “In here…” She gestured into the cupboard and Elain moved closer to look. “All you will need. Supplies.”

Feeling herself blush when she took in the amount of food in the cupboard, Elain wondered just how long the frenzy would last. “That is quite an amount of food.” She murmured softly and Ashk nodded. 

“It may be necessary.”

“Alright.” She looked then to the other door across the room, and Ashk began heading that way. “Is that the bathroom?”

“It is.”

“Wonderful.” Elain walked quickly across the room to the door to the bathroom, grinning when she looked in and saw the largest bathtub she thought she had ever seen. “Oh my…” 

Ashk made what Elain thought may have been a huff of a laugh as she stepped through the doorway. “This…” she said, “was all Helion’s doing.”

“I… actually don’t think I’m surprised.” Elain replied, glancing at the other female. “This is very… _Lucien_.” Her eyes moved around the luxurious bathroom. The large tub took up nearly a third of the room, and there was a distinctive Autumn motif around the walls and set into the tiles. 

“Yes.” Ashk agreed, her voice joyful. “It is.”

Elain smiled at her before glancing around the bathroom once more. She then went back into the main room of the suite and let herself take it all in again. This would definitely do well for what she anticipated she and Lucien would need. 

“Do you like it?” Ashk asked. 

“I do.” Elain nodded, her eyes still sweeping the room. “It’s perfect.”


	159. Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Nine

**Chapter 159**

When the faerie grabbed his hand, Lucien blinked, turning to look down at her. The faerie who had been wearing the green dress the day before smiled at him. “Thank you.” She said to him, “Lord Lucien. Thank you for what you did for me.”

“You’re welcome.” Lucien felt a twinge of guilt, remembering the way that he had wanted to run away and find Elain, and that it had been Tamlin who had convinced him to stay and help.

“We are lucky to have you here now.” She was smiling up at him still, her hand still clasping his and holding him there as Helion moved ahead. The High Lord was speaking to those who had been healed and who were still being healed all around the room. Lucien glanced from Helion back to the faerie still gripping his hand.

“I appreciate that.” He said to her.

“You are very much like the High Lord.” She went on. “It is evident within you.”

“I…” he looked back to Helion. It was clear that the subjects of the Day Court loved and admired the High Lord from the way they were interacting with him, and from everything Lucien had seen and heard of the Day Court over the years and since he had been here the last few days. “I… I am glad you think so.” She released his hand then and Lucien gave her another smile. “I hope you are feeling better.” He said before striding toward Helion once more. When he reached the older male, Helion turned to look at him, and Lucien felt as if those amber eyes were looking right into him. 

“You made an impression.”

“I barely did anything.” Lucien replied, feeling himself flush with embarrassment and guilt. 

“That is not what I have heard.”

They strode for the doors and Lucien shook his head. “I wanted to run.” He said, “I wanted to find Elain. I couldn’t feel the bond and it was driving me mad.”

“Yet you stayed and helped.”

“Tamlin is to be thanked for that.” He muttered. 

“For bringing it to your attention, maybe.” Helion replied, “But you ignored your most primal instinct to find your mate among chaos. Not many could fight such a desire, and you did. To help others.”

“I…”

“That is what a good High Lord would have done.”

“Someone should say that to Tamlin.” He said softly, knowing that those words would mean so much to his old friend.

“Once you’ve accepted it as truth yourself, you can tell him.” Helion smiled at him and gestured down the hallway. “Sorcha is being kept in a room in the north.”

“Do you wish tot speak to her now?”

“I think so.” Helion ran a hand through his dark hair, “And this afternoon, I thought that you would address the Court in my stead to announce that everything is being done to help those who need it, and to apprehend those responsible.”

“Me?” Lucien asked, tilting his head as he slanted a glance at his father. “Why?”

“I named you my Heir.” Helion said lightly, “When you speak, they will hear me.”

“Yes…” Lucien nodded. He knew that, as Helion’s heir, part of his duties would be speaking on behalf of the High Lord. “What will you be doing?”

“Ah.” Helion gave a casual shrug, “I’m sure I will find something.”

“You want me to address the Court because… you want to begin establishing me as a reliable part of the Court and a leader…” Lucien was speaking more to himself than to Helion, trying to work out what the High Lord was doing.

“Something like that.” Helion led him around a corner and then looked at him with a grin. “Are you able to spare the time?” his grin widened and Lucien tilted his head. “Or, do you think you might be a little too busy with your mate?”

“I…” Lucien blinked, “What do you mean?”

“I would have thought you would know what I mean.” Helion’s voice held laughter. “I thought you put effort and attention into everything you do.”

Lucien slanted a look at the High Lord. “You heard that…”

“Of course I did. Also, I’m pleased that my nose isn’t the only thing you inherited from me.”

“Wh-” Lucien choked a little, trying _desperately_ not to picture just what that entailed, and tried to keep his mother as far from his mind as possible.

“Do you have a plan?” Helion asked, and Lucien raised a questioning eyebrow at him. “For the frenzy?”

“Oh…” Lucien bit his lip as he matched his stride to the older male’s. “Should I?”

“Yes.”

“I… figured that I would just let it happen naturally.”

“I’m sure that would be fine for the most part,” Helion said, and Lucien glanced quickly at him before looking back to the ground as they continued to stride up the hallway. “But, you obviously want it all to go well…”

“Obviously…” Lucien frowned. He hadn’t considered that it was possible for it to go badly. “What do I need a plan for?” he asked, “You don’t think I’d… hurt… her, do you?”

“No…” Helion shook his head, “Of course, things happen…” Amber eyes turned Lucien’s way for a moment, “There are also other things to be considered. As intense as the frenzy is said to be, there will be times when you’re not… mating.”

Lucien made a face at the term. “Ah…”

“It will still be a time of high intimacy.” Helion went on, “What will you do during these moments?”

“I don’t know.” Lucien admitted. “I hadn’t thought of it… I… I haven’t ever really needed a plan to spend time with Elain. It has always come so naturally…” He thought for a moment, “Being with her is easier than being with anyone has ever been… I figured it would be more so once the bond has been accepted and grows stronger.”

“I am sure you are correct.” The High Lord of the Day Court smiled at him and Lucien ran a hand over his own face, fingers brushing his scar. “Females like special occasions, however.” Helion gave him a significant look, and Lucien knew that the other male was speaking from personal experience. “I suspect Elain would be the same. She would appreciate an effort to mark the occasion.”

“A mating gift.” Lucien said, and Helion gave a small nod of acknowledgement. “I had considered the thought. I wasn’t sure if it was…” Lucien shrugged “Is it customary here?”

“Does it matter?” Helion smiled, “If you want to do it, you should. She is your mate, and she will respond to you and what is genuinely from you.”

“You’re right.” Lucien made a mental note to sort that out by the end of the day. “Thank you.”

“You are welcome.” Helion grinned at him, and Lucien relaxed a little. “You can speak to me about this any time that you like, Lucien. You are aware of this, aren’t you?”

“Yes.” Lucien smiled, “Thank you.” He didn’t know if he was surprised by Helion’s openness or not, but he appreciated that the offer had been made nonetheless. 

“This is the room.”

“Oh.” Coming to a stop in front of a narrow door, Lucien stared at it. He had forgotten that they had been on their way to question Sorcha on what she had attempted to do the day before. “Right…”


	160. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty

**Chapter 160**

The room was small and simply furnished. There were no curtains on the windows, and the morning sun shone brightly into the room, illuminating every aspect and leaving Sorcha nowhere to hide. She knelt in the middle of the small space, her head bowed demurely as Helion approached, and Lucien trailed after him, making sure the door was locked once they were inside.

“Sorcha…” Helion stopped, looking down at the priestess on her knees before him. 

“High Lord.”

Lucien watched the way she turned her pretty face up at Helion, her eyes bright and adoring as she looked at him. With the sun shining through the window as it was, and right across where Sorcha knelt, he wondered if she had chosen that spot specifically for this purpose. She looked the picture of innocence, and he hoped that the High Lord wasn’t falling for it. Taking several steps forward Lucien moved to stand beside his father, looking down at Sorcha.

“Let’s go over this again,” Helion said, “Explain your actions so that Lucien can hear what you have to say for yourself.”

“I…” Sorcha glanced momentarily at Lucien before returning her eyes to Helion. “I, of course, never meant to hurt you, High Lord.”

“And yet.” Lucien cut in, “You killed several people.”

Sorcha had the nerve to look contrite. “I did not think that would happen…” she said softly. Lucien went to ask how she could possibly claim that, but she went on. “I only wanted to cause a little bit of panic and mess… and then I was going to help heal anyone who was injured and to rebuild and take care of anything that I could help with. Then everyone would see that I loved the Day Court, and hopefully I would be given a better position…”

“You drugged half the Court with faebane.” Helion’s voice held no softness, and Lucien was glad to hear it.

“Yes, so that I could be one of the few who could heal…” she frowned, “I… would have been…. invaluable.” She looked between them imploringly then. “I would have done everything I could to help.”

“That wouldn’t have b-” Lucien was cut off by Helion raising a hand to silence him.

“We’re not here to enter into debate with her.” His father said softly, “Only for her to talk.”

Lucien bit back anything further he had been about to say with great difficulty. Holding his tongue never had been his strong suit. He looked from Helion back down at Sorcha, trying to clear his expression of any distaste while the priestess drew a deep breath, her pretty eyes wide and pleading.

“I didn’t know it would be so… bad.” She said, tears welling in those eyes. “I didn’t know that they would make the whole balcony fall…”

“Who?” Helion’s tone was sharp, and Lucien knew that he would have answered any question directed at him in that manner without so much as a thought. Sorcha, however, did not seem so affected. 

“Lesser faeries.” She murmured, “I told you yesterday. I don’t know them. They left the palace… I don’t know where.”

Lucien thought that was just entirely too convenient and he rolled his eyes. “You targeted Elain…”

“No… I… just wanted to prevent her having any of her visions…” her voice sounded small and innocent.

When he looked back down at her, it was to find the Priestess already watching him. “Is that it?” he asked, and she turned her eyes on Helion. 

“Please.” She breathed, “My only wish is to serve you, High Lord.”

“If you have no new information for me, Sorcha, I will have to go and deliberate your fate.”

“Please…” she shuffled forward then, and Lucien watched her hands reach out, taking hold of one of Helion’s legs. She moved even closer to him, still looking up at him pleadingly. “Please… I only wish to serve you.”

Helion extracted himself from the priestess’ hands and turned for the door. Lucien followed him silently, casting one glance over his shoulder at Sorcha who still knelt on the floor. When they were out in the hallway, he turned to the High Lord with a sigh. “… was that helpful?”

“Do you believe her?” Helion asked, “Do you believe that she didn’t know how bad it would be? That the entire balcony would collapse?”

Lucien thought about it. “I… am not certain.” He replied, “But… no… I don’t believe her.”

“No do I.” 

“What will you do with her?” 

“It needs to be discussed with all the High Lords.” Helion said, “They will all have to vote.” The High Lord paused for a second. “She went after Elain, so I think she should have a say as well… her sisters too…”

Lucien nodded, fairly certain he knew what both Nesta and Feyre would want done to Sorcha. “Do you often execute traitors here?”

“No.” Helion replied, “It has been centuries since I have had a traitor in my Court.”

*

“Is your sex-suite satisfying?” 

“Feyre!” Elain gasped, her eyes on her younger sister. 

“Well…?” Feyre’s pale eyes were focused on Elain who felt herself blush. Looking to Nesta for support, Elain resisted a sigh when she found nothing but interest and curiosity on her elder sister’s face too. 

“Ashk said that Helion designed most of it.” Viviane put in, mischief and joy clear in her blue eyes. 

“That is fairly apparent when looking at it.” Elain admitted. “It is almost as if he is trying to remind Lucien that he is his son.”

“Interesting.” Nesta mused. “Strange that he would want reminders of himself around the room that his son would be stuck in for his mating frenzy…”

“He probably thought he was being welcoming.” Viviane put in. “Establishing a sort of home for him in the Day Court, as a part of the Court.”

“That makes sense.” Elain agreed. “That seems to be what his goal has been the entire time that Lucien and I have been here.” She leaned forward to the little table between the couches upon which they sat, and poured herself a fresh cup of tea. “He wants Lucien to feel like he belongs here.”

“He wants you both to stay.” Feyre agreed. “So… what does this room look like?”

“It’s golden.” Elain told them, grinning a little. “There are suns everywhere, and flowers… and the bathroom has the biggest bathtub I have ever seen.” Her eyes flicked from Feyre to Nesta to Viviane, “There’s a garden…”

Feyre laughed at that. “Just be sure to keep your activities to the bed inside and try not to get all dirty in the _gardenbed_.”

“Oh, Feyre.” Nesta shook her head, “That was…”

Feyre rolled her eyes at Nesta. “Tell me more about why Cassian is here…?”

Elain watched Nesta flush scarlet and go silent instantly. “I… already told everyone.” Her elder sister murmured, “He came to help if Sorcha wasn’t found…”

“Mhmm.” Feyre’s tone told anyone listening that she didn’t believe that at all. Elain let her gaze drop back to the teapot on the table, and she fiddled absently with it. 

“When do you think I should do it?” she asked, not really sure if she wanted an answer from the other females. She didn’t know if she would heed their advice, or not, but she supposed it would be an interesting thing to discuss considering what had happened lately. “Should I wait… because of what Sorcha did…?”

“Nobody can tell you that.” Viviane said gently, picking up her own teacup. “You do it when it feels right for you.”

Nodding, Elain thought about that. She would have to speak with Helion again.


	161. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-One

**Chapter 161**

The talking had gone around and around in circles, and Elain was growing weary. She sat at the large round table in one of Helion’s large golden rooms. The High Lords from each of the Courts were present and, at that moment, all of them seemed to be speaking at once. Elain resisted rolling her eyes and looked around at Nesta who sat beside her. Her eldest sister looked about as annoyed at Elain felt, and she supposed that both she and Nesta felt they had better places to be. 

“What she has claimed doesn’t matter.” Tarquin interjected louder than anyone else at that moment. “She was a part of it. She must pay for it.”

“Does intention not matter?” Thesan asked.

“Her intention was to do exactly what she did.” Tarquin replied.

“That is not what she claims.” Thesan’s voice was steady, and Elain found him easy to listen to. “The girl has said that she was unaware of the severity of what was to happen. I think that counts for something.”

“Not if she was lying.” Eris put in. Elain watched the High Lord of the Autumn Court turn his amber eyes on Lucien. “You think she was lying…”

“I…” Lucien’s voice was hesitant, and she knew that he was considering the weight his words now would hold. “I do think she was lying about that.” He said gently, “I think she was the architect behind the whole thing, and by casting doubt on her intentions she hopes to soften the judgment cast against her.”

“Of course she does.” Eris said, looking back to the others around the table. “You’ve all seen how this female acts… Everything she has done since we got here has been to try and gain power for herself. This is no different.”

“What is to be done with her, then?” Tamlin asked, leaning on the table with one of his elbows as he raised a blonde eyebrow at Eris. 

“This is Helion’s Court…”

“This is why I have asked you all here.” Helion spoke up. “The attack was on all of us. The decision must be made by all of us as well.”

Elain just watched the room as murmurs swept around the table. She watched as Rhys and Feyre exchanged a look she couldn’t decipher, and then she turned her head to look at Lucien, seating to her right. “What decision does he want us to make?” she murmured, meeting his eyes when he turned them her way. 

Lucien leaned toward her, and Elain tilted her head as he brought his lips to her ear. “The punishment is likely to be execution.” She turned her head again to look up at him, taking in the steely look behind his russet eye. 

“You agree with it?” she asked, and he gave a single nod. 

“She tried to kill us… you…” one of his hands wrapped around her wrist, holding carefully. “She deliberately targeted you… If she was willing to kill to gain position in the Court, there’s no doubt that she would do it again. She cannot be trusted… she is dangerous to everyone.”

“And everyone has to agree?” Elain breathed, her eyes going back to Lucien’s face. He nodded as his eyes, both russet and gold, flicked back and forth across her face. 

“Helion did say he wanted a unanimous decision. That the decision must be made together.”

“I see.” 

Lucien looked as if he were going to say something further to her when Kallias spoke up. “Shall we put it to a vote, then?”

“You’ve made up your mind then?” Rhys asked mildly.

“The Priestess attacked us.” Kallias replied, “All of the High Lords of Prythian. In any Court, an attack on any of us is a sentence of death. It doesn’t seem there is much of a decision to make.”

“Very well.” Helion said, “We must all agree.” He got to his feet, and Elain watched him. “Raise your hand if you agree that the Priestess Sorcha is to be put to death for her actions and involvement in the attack on the balcony.” 

Around the table, hands were raised in unison. Tarquin, Thesan, Kallias and Viviane, Tamlin, Rhys and Feyre, Eris, Lucien. Helion raised his own hand as his amber eyes shifted to Nesta, and Elain watched as her sister slowly raised her hand. 

Elain did not move. 

“Petal…” Lucien’s voice was soft. 

“No.”

“Elain…” Helion said, his own voice gentle. “We need your vote…”

“No.” She replied, stronger this time.

“What do you mean ‘No’?” Tarquin asked. 

“I think it’s pretty clear.” Elain said, her pulse quickening in her veins. They were all looking at her now, all expecting her to raise her hand and cast her vote. That vote would mean that Sorcha would be put to death, and she wanted no part of it. 

“You need to vote.” Eris said, “That’s how this works…”

“I am aware.”

“I don’t think you understand…” Tarquin put in, “It needs to be unanimous.”

“I do understand.” Elain said, surprised by the sharpness in her voice now. “You’re saying that you need my vote. I’m saying that you can’t have it.”

It wasn’t that she liked the Priestess at all. Elain could hardly stand the thought of the blonde female. Especially after what the bitch had tried to do to Lucien in that hallway, and then for what she had said afterward about his scar. Elain had no love for Sorcha at all, but she did not want to participate in this. It was clear what the others all wanted, and if that was their decision then they could just go and do it themselves, but she was not going to let them force her to vote when it clearly didn’t matter anyway. She would not be pushed into agreeing with something that she did not want any part of. 

Another murmur went around the table, and several pairs of confused eyes focused on her again. “What is it that you are thinking, Elain?” this was Helion, and Elain was relieved to see actual interest in his eyes and not annoyance or anger as he looked at her. 

“You’ve all made your minds up.” She said, “If that is what you intend to do to Sorcha, then I see no point in even participating in this. I have no wish to cast a vote that will send anyone to their death. You can do what you like, but I’ll have no part in it.” Elain saw Viviane smile at her, and Lucien’s hand squeezed her wrist gently, his thumb tracing over her skin in soothing circles. She could feel the small spark of pride coming off of him and she turned her eyes his way to meet his gaze for a moment. 

“Very well.” Helion said, “We will not be getting a unanimous vote…” 

“So, what will we do?” Thesan asked. 

“We go through with it.” Tarquin put in, and Elain met his eyes as he looked at her. “Elain refuses to vote, but every vote received was for execution…”

“Why bother voting then, if we just ignore anyone who does not agree?” Tamlin asked, his green eyes moving around the table. 

“We cannot ignore what should be done, because one female does not agree.” Tarquin stared at Tamlin and then looked to Helion. Elain felt Lucien’s temper flare and she set her hand gently on his knee beneath the table. Helion looked around the table at all of them, and Elain could see him trying to work out what to say or do. “I did say we would require unanimous agreement…”

“One dissenting vote is close enough.” Tarquin said. “Elain has registered her distaste for what must be done, however, it remains something we must do. Any who assisted Sorcha in her plot who may remain in the Court need to see what happens to those who attempt to do something like that to any High Lord, let alone all of them at once. This is not something we have a choice in.”

“What about ostracism?” Eris put in. 

“The Autumn Court’s new favourite?” Tarquin asked. 

“I… seem to recall a problem with that plan.” Thesan put in softly. “Your ostracised brother attempted to murder Lucien and I because he was able to join up with others without a Court. I imagine the Priestess would be just as convincing.”

Eris made a face and fell silent, and Elain’s eyes went back to Helion. 

“Elain…” The High Lord of the Day Court began, “I urge you to reconsider…” his voice was gentle, and Elain held his eyes. “We will vote again…”

“It does not matter.” She said, “I’ll make it easy for you.” Getting to her feet, Elain let go of Lucien and moved away from the table. “I understand that you feel you need to do whatever you must… but I will not vote for it.”

With that, she turned and strode from the room.


	162. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Two

**Chapter 162**

It was Ashk who was the first to find Elain sitting in one of Helion’s studies. The Lady of the Autumn Court sank down in a chair beside Elain, who lifted her eyes to look at the red headed faerie. “How do you know?” 

“I have my ways.” Ashk replied gently. 

Elain looked at the other female who said nothing further. “You think I should have voted with them?”

“Not if you don’t think you should have.”

“I’ll wager they all do.”

“They’re males.” Ashk shrugged, “It will not be the last time you have differing opinions. When you are the Lady of the Day Court and Lucien is High Lord, you will have more power and the ability to make them hear you.” She smiled kindly at Elain, “You will get better at making yourself understood.”

“How did you do it?” Elain looked at Ashk, remembering Beron’s harshness. She had no idea how this gentle lady had dealt with such a male.

“Time and experience.” Ashk told her. “You will have these also.” Lifting a soft hand to her shoulder, Ashk smiled again. “And Lucien already listens to you. That would have been half your battle.”

“He does.” Elain agreed, smiling in response.

“Of course I do.” Lucien’s voice came from the doorway and both Elain and Ashk turned to watch as he strode across the room toward them. When he reached the couch, he bent and pressed an affectionate kiss to his mother’s cheek before turning his own eyes on Elain. “Are you alright, Petal?”

“Yes.”

His eyes flicked back and forth across her face, and she watched as he knelt in front of her. He was still looking at her with an assessing look and she tilted her head as she looked back at him. “They’re going to execute Sorcha.” He said softly, watching her reaction. Elain just nodded.

“I figured they would.”

“… how do you feel about that?” he asked, and Elain let out a sigh.

“I don’t know.” She replied, “You are right in that she is dangerous. Even if she was exiled like Eris suggested, then she could have done what your brothers did and convinced some of the Courtless to join with her. She could hardly remain here, because she would just keep trying to attain what she wanted…”

“So you agree with the decision?” Lucien raised an eyebrow and Elain tilted her head again, her eyes on his face. 

“I never said that I didn’t. I didn’t say I wanted her excused or pardoned…” She replied. “I just did not want to be made to vote for it. It was what was going to happen anyway… I will not be someone who lifts their hand to vote because everyone else did. I will not be someone who has cast a vote to end someone else’s life.”

“I see…” Lucien went higher on his knees, lifting one of his large hands to her cheek and cupping it gently. “I see, my love.”

“Do you?”

“I was so proud of you.” He smiled, “Biting back at Tarquin like that. Standing your ground.”

“Until I walked out.” She murmured, her eyes on his face and he nodded. 

“You’ll get better at it.” He told her, his thumb tracing her jaw. “You’ll learn ways to make them listen when you disagree with them.”

“Your mother told me the same thing.” She said, her eyes going to Ashk who smiled. 

“Who do you think taught me?” Lucien grinned. Elain lifted one of her own hands to his face, her fingers moving gently over his scar before sliding back into his hair. She held his gaze, still able to feel pride from him down the bond. It was true, he had liked her voicing her opinion to the other High Lords, and that she hadn’t backed down and given her vote just because they had wanted her to. “Your defiance,” he murmured, low enough that Elain wasn’t sure if Ashk would be able to hear, “was so very sexy…”

Elain blushed, her fingers still combing through his hair. “I’ll keep that in mind for later.” She replied, hoping that only he could hear her. He grinned and, if she had heard, Ashk pretended that she hadn’t heard a thing.

*

The execution was to be at sundown, and Elain was not going. She saw no reason for her presence. Lucien had been required as he was Helion’s son and the heir to the Day Court, and he was expected to show his agreement with the sentencing, and his support as it was carried out. All of the other High Lords were to attend as well. Elain, however, went back to the suite that Helion had prepared for herself and Lucien. 

She had been slowly moving their belongings into the suite all afternoon. She hadn’t told Lucien as she still wished for her acceptance of the bond to be a surprise and she didn’t want him to know that she was developing a plan for how it was to happen. She had begun with the smallest of their things, hoping that she was choosing things that would not be missed. Knowing that when the time came, the rest of their belongings would be moved to the suite for them, she made sure that there was no thing laying around that might be overlooked.   
When she got to the suite, Elain set about a little bit of redecoration. She liked all of it, that was true, but she rather thought that some things could be in different places. The couches around the sitting area in the entrance, for instance. Gripping the armrest, Elain pushed and dragged until she could shift the entire couch. When she had worked out how to best move them, she spent a good hour shifting the room around until she had it the way she wanted it. By then, the sun outside was low and the very air seemed to glow a faint orange. It was sunset, and Elain knew what must be happening at that very moment. 

A twinge of something reached Elain down the bond from Lucien and she sank onto one of the couches trying to identify the emotion. Distaste? Regret? Knowing that he would return to their room when he was free to do so, Elain got to her feet and turned to look at the rest of the suite one last time. Everything looked as it should, and she gave a satisfied smile before heading out the door. It didn’t take her long to get back to their room, and Elain found it empty of her mate. She could still feel him down the bond and so she sank down onto the bed to wait for him. 

Only about ten minutes later, the door opened and Lucien came in. His face reflected exactly what she could feel of him down the bond and she met his eyes as he approached her. Patting the bed beside herself, Elain shuffled to make space for him and Lucien sat down next to her. 

“Love…” she murmured, rubbing a hand over his back softly. “Is it done?”

“Yes.” He replied, his voice soft. 

“Was it horrible?”

“Yes…”

Elain leaned against Lucien’s arm, resting her head against his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” She breathed and he nodded, leaning back against her. 

“At least we’re safe now.” He murmured, “All of us.”

“Did Helion speak?” she asked, “Before the sentence was carried out?”

“He did.” Lucien said, “He explained the choice, and made it clear to anyone else thinking of doing something similar that they would face the same fate.” She could still feel him down the bond, and she smiled up at him, pressing her lips to his shoulder. 

“I love you.” She murmured and, when he turned to look down at her, he smiled softly back at her. 

“Not as much as I love you, Petal.”


	163. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Three

**Chapter 163**

He had noticed that things had gone missing. Casting his eye around the room, Lucien tried to figure out exactly what had disappeared. Nothing specific of consequence, as if whoever had taken things had tried to figure out what wouldn’t be missed. Wondering idly if he should say something to Helion, Lucien frowned. Who would want to take random things from them?

Getting to his feet, he began prowling around the room. There were several books missing, as well as some of Elain’s dresses. Many of the trinkets she had begun keeping by the bed were also gone, and he turned to head into the bathroom. The small basket of soaps and salts that Elain had kept by the bathtub was gone and Lucien spun back around. He had to tell Helion. Somebody was stealing from them. 

Elain had gone down to dinner when Nesta had knocked on their door earlier, and he had decided to take his time getting ready. That was when he had first noticed that things had vanished. The vanity at which Elain sat to get ready was nearly clear, instead of strewn with her things, and then he had looked around the rest of the room. 

Moving to stand in the doorway, Lucien let his eyes sweep the room again. Trying to see if he could sense anything of whoever had been in here, he held his breath for a moment before taking a slow deep breath, scenting the air. There was nothing but his own scent and the heady floral scent of Elain. He didn’t think anybody else had been in here. 

Lucien froze. If nobody but Elain and himself had been in the room, then that would mean that Elain had taken everything. Where had she put it all? Why had she done it? Was she planning on leaving? The thought just about knocked Lucien back a step. Surely that wasn’t it. She was planning on accepting the bond. They were moving forward, not backward. Had she decided that this was not what she had wanted? No. He wouldn’t let his mind go there. There was another reason. There was something that he was missing. 

Deciding that he would just ask her what she was doing, Lucien straightened his jacket before he headed out the door and to dinner. He wouldn’t let his brain or his panic get ahead of him. Elain loved him, and she wanted to be with him. He knew this was fact. 

The moment he walked through the door, he spotted her sitting at the table beside Nesta. The seat on Elain’s right was empty and he knew that she had saved it for him as she usually did. The realisation warmed his heart nearly as much as the happiness that hit him down the bond when he sank into that chair beside her and she turned to look at him. “Lucien…” she breathed, low enough that nobody else would have heard her. He blinked, his eyes on her face when she reached out and lay her hand on his knee beneath the table. “Make sure you pay attention to Nesta and Cassian.” She grinned at him, “It’s hilarious.”

She was acting no different with him than usual and he couldn’t take his eyes off of her face. She noticed. “ah…” he murmured, and Elain tilted her head. 

“What is the matter?” She asked and Lucien resisted a sigh. He should just ask. He knew that. 

“Some things are missing from our room.” Elain’s eyes widened just a little, and Lucien’s breath caught in his throat. She clearly had not intended for him to notice. “…why?” he asked. He watched as her expression changed and her gaze sharpened as she looked at him. 

“What did you think?” she asked, her eyes locked onto his face. “I can feel your… uncertainty.”

“I… at first, I thought someone had been stealing from us.”

Elain shook her head. “No, it was me.” Her expression softened then, and she smiled shyly at him. “I can’t tell you why. Not yet.”

Lucien felt his heart flutter in his chest then. “Oh…” she wasn’t intending to leave him, he could see that. “When can you tell me?”

“I can’t tell you that, either.” 

“You’re being very mysterious, Petal.”

“Yes…” Elain’s grin widened even further and she leaned into him, pressing her lips gently to his cheek. “You’ll just have to manage a while.”

“Well…” Lucien brought one of his hands up to her cheek, his fingers ghosting over her neck lightly. “not too long, I hope.”

“Not too long.” She agreed, her eyes holding his. Lucien touched a finger to the tip of her nose, watching as her face brightened in another smile. “I love you.” She said, and Lucien got the distinct impression that she was saying it to reassure him.

“I know.” He let his eyes slip past her to Nesta. “Tell me of this drama with Cassian?”

*

Allowing herself to get caught up the antics at the table, Elain had almost forgotten about what had gone on earlier in the day. As the High Lords began entering the room and taking up places at the table, she could feel their eyes on her. Nobody had said anything about Sorcha at all, but she knew that was where the thoughts at the table had gone. 

Glancing up and along the table, Elain realised that Tarquin was still looking at her, and her pulse quickened in her veins. What did he want? Did he expect her to apologise for walking out on the meeting earlier? Did he want to know what she thought about Sorcha’s execution? Elain didn’t know. She didn’t know what to do or say, but something in her chest eased a little when Lucien’s hand slid into hers beneath the table. 

“It’s okay, Petal.” He breathed and Elain turned her eyes on him. He squeezed her hand and she nodded her acknowledgement. At the sound of Cassian’s low laugh, Elain turned his way to see the Illyrian wink at her. 

“Nesta said that you didn’t let those High Lords push you around.” He said, and Elain felt herself blush slightly. “Good.” He went on. “Keep it up.”

Glancing then at her sister, Elain raised an eyebrow and Nesta just stared back at her. “Were they annoyed after I left?” 

“No.” Nesta replied softly, “They said it was unfortunate that you didn’t feel you could vote with them, but that it needed to be done.”

Elain made a face and reached for her goblet, taking a sip of wine. “Did they discuss the trade route?”

“No.” Nesta told her, “They said they would meet regarding that tomorrow, and then return to their Courts the day after.”

“Oh…” Elain glanced up the table again. “Does that include Feyre and Rhys?” 

“I suppose so.”

“And will you be returning to the Night Court with them?” She turned back to Nesta who was studying her.

“I will stay as long as you want me to, Elain.” Her sister smiled at her, “You know that, right?” Elain smiled and nodded when Nesta’s hand reached out and skimmed down her arm. “I know what you’re planning… and… I will stay until after it’s done.”

Unexpected relief washed through Elain at those words and she found herself blinking back tears. “Thank you.” She breathed and Nesta gave her a gentle smile. 

“You’re welcome.”


	164. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Four

**Chapter 164**

The conversation about the trade routes and other such seemingly important topics dominated the room both through dinner and afterwards when the faeries present split off into smaller groups. Elain tried to listen as much as she could, but she found the repeated opinions irritating, and the lack of progress in the plan got under her skin. She knew that Lucien was listening, she could tell by the way that he sat straight in his seat, his head cocked just a little. Elain was unable to help watching the way that his vibrant red hair fell into his face, covering his golden eye as he kept his head turned just enough to try and catch snatches of conversation coming from Eris and Tarquin. 

“Handsome mate.” She murmured, sliding her hand up his leg. “Why don’t you go and join them?” her eyes moved over his face, enjoying the way that the firelight lit up his skin and turned his hair to molten metal. 

“No…” His eyes slid toward her, and Elain tilted her head as she met his gaze. “Whatever they would say would change if I were there.” He gave her a gentle smile, “Besides, I prefer being by your side.” One of his warm hands come to rest over her own and she smiled back at him. 

“Even if I am being secretive?” she asked, teasing him. When Lucien gave her a devious grin, raising an eyebrow at her, Elain felt heat pool between her legs. “Uhh…” her breath was a soft groan. 

“Especially when you’re being secretive.” Lucien’s voice was a soft purr, and the look on his face told Elain that he knew precisely the effect he was having on her. He leaned into her then, his lips brushing her ear and his breath hot against her skin, “Would you like to meet me by the refreshment table…?”

“Yes…”

Lucien smiled at her as he straightened and then he got to his feet, striding across the room. Elain drew a steadying breath before getting to her own feet and following him. She picked up a goblet of wine when she reached the table and took a sip as she turned her eyes on her mate whose own eyes were running up and down the table, taking in what had been placed out for them. When his eyes reached her, Elain watched Lucien look her over. As he moved closer, she felt her heartbeat quicken, and she heard his do the same when he reached a hand out to her, brushing her hair back over her shoulder.

“Didn’t you want a drink?” she asked and he tilted his head. His fingers skimmed down her back, following her spine, and Elain shivered. Lucien smiled more widely. 

“I just wanted you over here with me.”

“Why?”

“Come…” Lucien took Elain’s hand, and she allowed him to pull her behind one of the curtains. With a start, Elain realised that this was the very same curtain that she had pulled him behind after she had thrown some fruit at Sorcha. 

“Lucien…?”

He turned her, pressing her back against the wall as he adjusted the curtain around them from behind so that nobody else in the room would be able to see them. “Yes…? He murmured, shifting forward until he was pressed against her, his hands tracing up her thighs, bringing her dress with them. 

“What are you doing?” she breathed, still able to feel that heat between her thighs. Lucien’s hands continued up her legs, before he slipped one hand between them. Elain gasped, and Lucien’s eyes, both russet and golden, flicked to her face. “Wh-what…?” she broke off, her eyes closing. “Ah…”

“Perhaps…” she could feel his breath on her face as he held himself still pressed against her. “I thought I might be able to convince you to tell me…” his fingers rubbed at Elain and she gasped again, “Tell me why you’ve been taking things from our room…”

“I… I can’t…” she grabbed at Lucien’s shoulder as her knees grew weak. Knowing that it was only his hold on her, and his body pressing firmly against hers, and holding her against the wall, that was keeping her on her feet, Elain allowed her head to tilt back against that wall. “Lucien…”

“Shhh…” his lips moved across her cheek, and then down her throat. “Someone might hear…”

“If… if they hear…” her words were nothing more than soft pants by this point, “It’s your fault…” He pushed his fingers into her, and Elain choked back a groan, trying to open her legs more widely for him. Lucien’s lips continued to move across her throat, and she was unable to help her hips moving against him when she felt his teeth scrape her skin.

“Give up your secret, mate.” She could hear the smirk in his voice, feel it against her throat, and she bit back a soft laugh. 

“I won’t…” a moan escaped her when Lucien’s fingers began working inside of her. His other hand came over her mouth and she heard a quiet chuckle from him. 

“Petal, one would think you want to get caught.”

Shaking her head, Elain clung to him. When he pulled his fingers from her, she felt him fiddling with his own clothing for a moment. Her head had not yet cleared enough to think straight before he had lifted her with one hand, the other still firmly over her mouth, and then he was properly inside of her. 

Elain didn’t care that there was only a curtain hiding them from the rest of the room. She didn’t care that every High Lord of Prythian, and her sisters were just on the other side. She didn’t even care that someone could find them at any moment. All that she cared about was that Lucien felt so very good, both his hand over her mouth, stifling her groaning as he moved inside of her, and the way that he held her against that wall. When his lips returned to her throat, Elain couldn’t help her nails scratching at him, raking over his coat and shoulders. She was gasping with every thrust into her, thankful that he was trying to keep her quiet, and heat flooded her when Lucien began grunting into her ear. 

She hadn’t thought that she would ever be doing this here, but Elain realised that she very much enjoyed it. The utter excitement reaching her down the bond from Lucien told her that he was thoroughly into it as well. There was a different kind of energy about him like this, and Elain knew that she wanted to see him like this again, although she didn’t know what they would have to do to achieve that. 

When she made a more high-pitched sound, Lucien’s hand over her mouth tightened as he tried to cut off any and all sounds she was making. His rhythm didn’t change however, and he continued to thrust up into her body with the same vigorous enthusiasm. Elain just clung to him as he pushed her closer and closer to her edge. 

She came with a shriek, cut off by Lucien’s hand, mere moments before he followed her, shuddering and groaning as he did so. His hand remained over her mouth even as he pulled himself from her, and set her back on her feet. Elain’s hands went to her dress, smoothing it down over herself and trying to make herself look presentable. When he eventually removed his hand, Lucien bent to press his lips to hers, and Elain wrapped her own arms around his neck, returning the kiss with all the heat she still felt within herself. 

Helping him fix his own clothing, Elain began to wonder how they would sneak back out from behind the curtain without anyone noticing. The grin Lucien gave her told Elain all she needed to know. He was going to do it they way he always did everything. Balls and sass.


	165. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Five

**Chapter 165**

Lucien had gone to the meeting with the High Lords and Elain had spent the day working up the courage to head down to the kitchens. She had spoken to Helion the night before, telling him what she wanted to do. He had assured her that she would be welcome in the kitchens and that she would have access to whatever she wanted. She was able to go down whenever she liked, and the faeries there would help her achieve what she had in mind. 

Elain had decided that she wanted to make cupcakes. She had thought long and hard about what kind of food she was going to offer Lucien, and her mind had focused on the early stages of their relationship when they had spent time each day in Rhys’ garden in the Night Court. That ritual they had daily where Lucien would bring her some offering or other from that bakery she liked had been important, and she thought she would give him something similar in return. 

Cupcakes decorated like flowers had been what she had settled on. He’d brought her some of those on more than one occasion, and she figured that sunflowers would be a nice representation of what she wanted. It seemed like a nice blending of the two of them. She hadn’t made sunflower cupcakes before, and she knew that she would require assistance so that the final product looked halfway decent. Smiling at the thought, Elain wondered if the mating bond would be properly accepted if the food she offered was so gross-looking that Lucien had no desire to eat it.

As soon as Lucien had gone to the meeting, Elain had collected another armful of things from their room and taken them to their new suite of rooms. She set about laying things out so that it felt more comfortable for them, and they would have everything they needed, and then she headed for the kitchens.

*

The meeting had taken longer than Lucien would have liked. He had hoped that, after everything that had gone on, everyone would be keen to come to some kind of agreement in order to get things moving. That had never been the way these things worked and, in the end, the conversations had gone around and around. It was clear that the High Lords were all behind their plan, but everyone seemed to need to have their opinion heard and, as usually happens when so many people are involved in a plan, nothing was easily settled upon. It was mid afternoon before they left the table with some semblance of a plan, and Lucien had been keen to find something to eat as they had skipped lunch. 

“I have organised a table of food to be laid out for you all.” Helion said, “It’s not much, but as there will be a feast tonight to celebrate all we have done and the last night in the Day Court for many of you, I would hope you would not fill yourselves too much just yet.”

“’Table of food’ was all I needed to hear.” Rhys drawled, slipping an arm around Feyre’s shoulders. Lucien watched his friend smile up at her mate in agreement before they strolled up the hallway after Helion. Following, Lucien was grateful that Helion had considered feeding them because his stomach was rumbling already. 

When they reached the dining hall, those who had been after food all took a plate and settled themselves around the room. Lucien sat with Rhys and Feyre, looking at them as they both picked at their plates. “So… you’re both leaving tomorrow?” he asked. 

“That’s the plan.” Feyre’s voice was steady and her blue-grey eyes lifted to meet Lucien’s gaze. “Why?”

“Just wondering.” He replied. “Are you taking Cassian with you, or is he remaining with Nesta…?”

“That’s up to Cassian.” Rhys said. “I don’t fancy being the one to tell him he needs to leave Nesta behind…”

“No…” Lucien agreed, unable to help picturing that scenario. “That seems… undesirable.” 

“He’d probably beat the shit out of me.” Rhys muttered, picking at his plate again. Lucien couldn’t help a grin. “Do…” Rhys hesitated and Lucien noticed his violet eyes flick to Feyre for a moment before he continued, “you… have any idea how long Nesta will be staying?”

“Uh…” Lucien paused for a second. 

“She told Elain she would wait until you were mated…” Feyre’s tone was gentle, and he could hear the hesitation in her voice.

“I see.” Lucien shifted his plate in front of him, fiddling idly. How was he meant to know when that would be done? There was no way to know how long the frenzy would last, let alone when Elain was even going to accept him. “I couldn’t tell you…” Was Nesta really going to stay until after? He figured that made sense. She would evidently want to know that Elain was alright after everything. 

He remained with Feyre and Rhys until everyone began to leave the room, and he got up. Lucien wanted to ask his mother if she was staying in the Day Court, or if she would be returning to the Autumn Court with Eris. She hadn’t said one way or the other, and he very much wanted to know what she were thinking. He figured that Eris would be okay with whatever she chose, although as far as Lucien knew, there was nobody in the Autumn Court that his elder brother was particularly fond of. Who would he have supporting him on the throne? When this was all done, and they were settled after their mating, Lucien thought he might like to visit the Autumn Court again. He had been worried for years that he would never get to go back there, but he knew now that Eris would allow him to visit as he wished, and he knew that Elain would also enjoy visits like that. There were many things around the Court that he still wished to show her, places he had enjoyed as a youngling that he knew she would appreciate. 

Striding for her rooms, Lucien headed to find Ashk. He hadn’t seen her since breakfast. He knew that she often took walks of an afternoon, much of the time with Elain. Perhaps he would be able to find the both of them. It really did make his heart happy to know that his mother and his Mate got on so well. He wasn’t at all surprised that they did, however. They were two of the gentlest hearts Lucien thought that he had ever come across in his life. The thought that he might get to have a life with the both of them around him every day made his blood just about sing in his veins. 

Thinking about the way his mother had been with Helion the last few days, Lucien began to hope that she might have seriously entertained the thought of staying in the Day Court. At least, he figured, if she had not already considered it, then he would put the idea into her mind. She would need time to consider, and time to discuss with Eris, he supposed. As he walked, Lucien wondered if he should have also discussed this with Helion. How would his father feel about Ashk remaining in the Day Court? He had seen the way the two of them looked at one another, and he had assumed that both of them would be into the idea. He hadn’t asked, though. What if he had been mistaken? He didn’t think so, but, one never really knew the heart of another.


	166. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Six

**Chapter 166**

By the time dinner came around that evening, Lucien still had not found Elain. She had not been with Ashk as he had hoped. His mother had told him that she hadn’t seen Elain since that morning, and had no idea where she might have been. He had been disappointed, but had enjoyed the opportunity to have a private talk with his mother. Ashk had confessed that she had considered staying in the Day Court, but that she did not know if this was possible. Lucien had asked her why, and found that he had been correct in wondering if Helion would have agreed. His mother had spoken about how she knew that Eris would allow her to do whatever she wished, but that she knew she would miss the Autumn Court. She had told him before that she belonged there, and he knew that she would miss it if she left. She had also apparently not asked the High Lord of the Day Court if she might stay. It wasn’t as simple as not packing and leaving, Lucien knew that. There were politics behind it all, and that had to be taken into account. What would her role in the Day Court be? Would she have been content to simply be known as the High Lord’s lover? Did he even want her as his official lover? Lucien knew that Helion was accustomed to moving from one lover to another. There was his reputation across Prythian to support this. Just because he had been enjoying having Ashk here for the last few days didn’t mean that he wanted anything further. Lucien had suggested to his mother that she have this conversation with Helion, and at least find out what he thought about it. She had agreed, and Lucien had headed for the room he shared with Elain, hoping to find his mate there.

Elain was not in their room, but Helion was. Lucien froze at the sight of the High Lord sitting on the chair by the window, and then he took several hesitant steps forward. 

“Has… something happened?” he asked, worry coursing through him. Was it Elain?

“Oh, no…” his father smiled as he got to his feet. “I just wanted to let you know that tonight, at dinner, you are again on ceremony as my heir.”

“Yes…”

“Most of the other High Lords will be leaving in the morning, so I want to give them a good show before they leave.”

“Alright.” Lucien didn’t know what that meant.

“I’d like you to wear this…” Helion gestured to something he had lay on the bed. “Traditional Day Court… like mine.”

“I will.” Lucien rather hoped that after everyone else had gone home, and if he stayed here more permanently, that he would be able to choose his own clothing. He wasn’t enormously pleased with being dressed like a doll. 

Helion’s amber eyes moved over him. “Is something wrong?”

“I haven’t been able to find Elain.” He replied, “Have you seen her?”

“Yes.” The High Lord smiled at him, “I gave her something of her own to wear. I suspect you will find her at dinner. It begins soon.” Lucien blinked and looked at the male standing before him. He had given Elain something to wear. And he was still here. Had he been here while she had changed? Barely able to swallow a snarl before it ripped out of him, Lucien turned away and ran his hand over his face and then through his hair. “…Lucien?”

Baring his teeth, Lucien shook his head, his back still to Helion. “I’m fine.” He ground out, “I’ll see you at dinner.” He was still enough to hear Helion shift a little before the High Lord apparently decided his best move was to leave. Lucien listened to the other male walk across the room to the door before slipping out into the hallway. 

Not knowing why his jealousy had suddenly flooded him so forcefully, Lucien let out a relieved sigh at being alone. He needed to find Elain. He was having a tough time dealing with the fact that he had been unable to find her, but others had seen her and spoken to her. He knew that was ridiculous, but he couldn’t help the emotion pumping its way through him. Closing his eyes, he reached for the bond, wanting to feel something of her, to reassure himself that he still had her, that the bond was there, waiting to be properly acknowledged and accepted. _He_ wanted to be accepted. 

He could feel her faintly. She was anxious, and Lucien frowned in confusion. What did she have to be anxious about? Perhaps she thought there might be another attack on them, as their had been at Helion’s last fancy dinner. He hoped not. She should feel safe here. 

“Right,” he muttered to himself, turning for the bathroom. Lucien figured that the best way to help Elain was to get himself ready for dinner and get down there. When he had her in front of himself, he would be able to reassure her about whatever it is that had her feeling anxious. Until then, he hoped that Nesta would be of some use to her. 

It took Lucien no more than twenty minutes before he was striding through the hallways, scowling at the short tunic that Helion had requested he wear. The entire thing felt just a little too _slutty_ to him. The neckline was low enough to show off half of his chest, and it only fell to about halfway down his thighs. Helion looked good in things like this, Lucien had no problem admitting that. He, however, was far more comfortable in his pants and jackets from the Spring Court or even the Autumn Court. This was not to his taste at all. 

When he approached the dining table, Lucien was more than pleased to be able to seat himself and cover his legs beneath the table. He had been able to tell, even as he pushed the door open, that Elain was not here. While he fiddled with the cutlery before himself, he reached for the bond again. She was still anxious, maybe more so now and, when the doors opened and he felt her walk into the room, his eyes found her immediately. 

A warm smile greeted him when Elain looked back at him, and Lucien felt his pulse quicken in his veins as she approached him and the table. She did not sit opposite him, but rather walked around the end of the table until she came to the empty seat beside him. “Hi…” she murmured, glancing at him before sitting down in the seat, her hands coming to the table top as she did so. 

“Petal…” he reached out, laying a hand against her leg. She was wearing a Day Court dress that matched his own and Lucien’s eyes moved over the leather corset-type belt she wore. He had seen other Day Court courtiers in similar things and he raised an eyebrow. “Did Helion give you that…?”

“Yes.” Her brown eyes flicked to him, and he watched her blush slightly. 

“It suits you…” his words were honest, and he enjoyed her small smile by way of response. 

“I am pleased you like it.” Her eyes moved over him, and he watched her smile twist at the edges. 

“Are you alright?” he asked her, unable to keep the question to himself any longer. “I could feel you. I could feel your anxiety…”

“Oh…” Elain looked at the table, “I am fine.”

Lucien had been about to press the issue when the doors opened and several large platters of food were carried into the room. Elain was clearly watching as dishes were placed before the diners, and he could feel her anxiety again. “Petal…” he began and she picked up her fork. 

“I’m hungry…” she told him, smiling at him briefly.

Lucien just watched her, not understanding why she would be keeping something from him. She knew that he could feel her, just as she could feel him. She must know that he wasn’t buying her denial of something being amiss, but she was doing nothing about that. Deciding that she would tell him in her own time, Lucien reached for his own fork and set about eating the dinner which had been placed before him. 

Halfway through the meal, Elain had slid her left hand into his lap, and Lucien had nearly dropped his cutlery in shock. She didn’t say anything, but he knew it was to reassure him. He looked up when the dishes were cleared and Helion got to his feet. 

“I would like to thank you all again for coming at such short notice,” the High Lord said, “Also, I would like to thank you again for what you have endured since being here. As we are all no doubt keen for some delicious dessert, I shall keep this brief. I would like you all to know that any of you are welcome to return and visit, and I have no doubt that we will all be seeing much of one another as we get this trade route established. I am very much looking forward to all of this.” Helion gestured to the door, and several more platters were brought in. Lucien got a brief glimpse of bowls laden with delicious looking tarts before Elain got so suddenly to her feet it was as if she had been struck by lightning.

“Petal?” he asked, reaching for her hand. She just looked at him for a moment before hurrying across the room to the doors. Lucien had been about to get to his feet to follow her, wanting to know what had happened, when she came back into the room, a tray in her hands. 

Elain’s brown eyes met Lucien’s gaze, and he found himself unable to so much as blink as she strode back across the hall toward him.


	167. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Seven

**Chapter 167**

He knew that every pair of eyes in the room was on him. Glancing up the table, Lucien found them all watching him, and he shifted his eyes back to Elain. She came to stand beside him and he watched as she, with shaking hands, set the tray on the table before him. Lucien stared at it. The tray was laden with cupcakes in the shape of sunflowers, and his heart began to race.

“Like I used to bring you…” he murmured, his eyes lifting back to meet her dark ones. “In the garden…”

Elain nodded, holding his gaze. When he didn’t move, she leaned forward and picked up one of the cupcakes, holding it out to him. “The ones you used to bring me from the bakery in Velaris were like your own acceptance of the bond…” Elain’s voice was so soft he had to strain to hear her. “It seemed fitting that mine matched yours…”

He could feel her nervousness, that anxiety from before. Lifting a hand, Lucien gently took the cupcake, his eyes unable to look away from her face. He watched as she smiled, and he held her eyes when he lifted the cupcake to his lips and took a bite. 

Joy and pleasure hit him down the bond then, but Elain didn’t move. He held her gaze, barely blinking, as he chewed and swallowed and took another bite of the cupcake, and she just watched him, her smile wide across her perfect face. 

It only took Lucien a third bite to finish the cupcake and, when he swallowed the last of it, he slowly got to his feet. Elain was still standing beside him, her eyes still on his, and Lucien lifted a hand to her cheek, bending to press a gentle kiss to her lips. He felt one of her hands at his elbow, as if trying to pull him closer, and he lifted his head to meet her eyes again. “Thank you, perfect mate.” He murmured, and Elain smiled at him again. 

For the first time since she had walked into the room with the tray, Elain looked away from him. Lucien followed her eyes and found she had looked to her sisters, both of whom were smiling at her. He then spared a glance for the rest of the table, and found them all still watching as well. Fierce possessiveness flowed through Lucien then, heat simmering beneath his skin, and he turned back to Elain. Her brown eyes were on him and in one fluid motion, he had swept her into his arms, lifting her high and holding her to himself. He wanted to get her somewhere he knew that others wouldn’t be looking at her. Somewhere he could have her all to himself. 

Elain’s soft hands came up and she gently took hold of Lucien’s face, making him look at her again. He felt his breath catch in his throat when she leaned in to press a kiss to his forehead, and he turned away from the table, taking her with him. He could still feel eyes on him, and he knew that he needed to get out. Without a backwards glance, Lucien strode for the door and the hallway outside. He was no longer prepared to share, and he intended to be alone with his mate.

Once out in the hallway, Lucien headed for their room, coming to a halt when Elain pressed a hand to his chest. “Not this way…” she breathed, and he looked down at her, confusion sliding though him. 

“Why?” he asked, wondering what it was that she wanted if not to go back to their room. 

“Let me show you.”

“Oh…” Lucien put her back on her feet when she wiggled to be free and he just watched her, fascinated, when she smiled at him and took his hand. 

“Come…”

He went with her, allowing her to pull him through the hallways. He had no idea where she was taking him, but he was more than willing to follow her wherever she wanted to go. Lucien just watched her, the way her honey-brown hair curled and swung down her back as she walked, and the way her eyes were alight with happiness every time she turned to look at him over her shoulder. Elain’s hand remained firm upon his, and Lucien knew that his heart was still thundering enthusiastically in his chest.

Elain led him to a large door with what looked to be a sun across it. Tilting his head, Lucien looked it over. “What is this?” he asked, and she smiled at him again as she reached for the door handle. 

“Ours.” She replied, turning the handle and pushing the door open. He glanced at her, before looking into the room. Elain stepped in ahead of him, pulling him in behind her and then closing the door after them. 

Her scent was everywhere in here. Lucien looked around and, an instant later, he knew why. All of the things he had noticed missing from their room were here. Her dresses hung on a rack by the wall, and all of her things from her vanity were by the mirror near the wall. Lucien raised an eyebrow when he saw his own pack sitting on a couch. He had been through it himself just before dinner, and he was astounded at the fact that it was here now. Either Elain had been back to the room after he had left, or she had had help. Helion knew, Lucien realised. The High Lord had been in on this. 

“You’ve been planning this…” he murmured, turning to Elain who was just standing and watching him for his reaction. She nodded and he strode toward her, reaching out to touch her and draw her closer. Elain folded herself into him, her arms coming around his waist as she lay her head against his chest, and Lucien held her tightly. 

“Are you surprised?” she asked softly, and he gave a gentle chuckle. 

“I am very surprised.” He replied, smiling when he felt her pleasure through the bond. “You put so much effort into this…”

“Of course I did.” Elain looked up at him, and he ran his fingers through her hair, “You’re worth it…”

“Oh, you think so?” He grinned at her when she frowned. Then, when Elain brought both hands up and pushed him back until he hit the couch and sank down onto it, he gave a started gasp. 

“I do.” Elain slid into his lap, and he watched her brown eyes move over him. “I like you in these Day Court clothes…” she said gently, and he felt her hands slide up over his chest. “I like being able to see your legs… those powerful thighs…” Lucien knew that he was instantly hard, even before Elain’s lips grazed his cheek on their way to his ear. “I love being able to see so much of you…”

He slid his own hands up her thighs as she straddled him. He wasn’t as much of a fan of the Day Court attire as she was, but he had to admit that he did appreciate how easy it was to have access to her in this short dress. Elain made a small noise of appreciation when his hands went up under her dress and she leaned into him, her chest against his as one of her hands slid around the back of his neck. “You feel so good…” he breathed, his hands slipping around behind her to grip her arse. He felt Elain nod an instant before he felt her tongue against his ear, and heat filled him again.

Lifting his hands, Lucien turned his attention to the leather belt that she wore. It was an elaborate thing, and he began trying to get it off of her, pulling at the laces and trying to untie the whole situation. It was difficult, and he could feel his heartrate increasing with every passing second that he failed to make much progress with it.

“Did Helion make you wear this to drive me crazy?” he asked, and then knew immediately that he had. Elain laughed softly against his ear and then reached down, her hands moving over his. Lucien shifted them out of the way and just let her remove the belt. He took it from her and then tossed it across the room toward the door. They definitely wouldn’t be needing it any longer.


	168. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Eight

**Chapter 168**

Running her fingernails down Lucien’s chest, she pulled the tunic off of him, pushing it from the couch and kicking it away. Then, leaning back on his knees, she let her eyes move slowly over his toned chest and body. He reached for her and Elain let him, smiling when one of his large hands came to rest against her cheek and he drew her closer. She pressed a soft kiss to his lips, her nails moving down his chest again, and she grinned when he pulled her dress from her, leaving her naked in his lap.

When Lucien’s hands went to her hips, and she felt him shift her closer, trying to pull her into position for himself, she went up on her knees, pushing him back against the couch by his shoulders. His eyes, both russet and golden, looked up at her and she saw his momentary confusion. Elain just smiled at him, one of her hands coming to his cheek as she looked down at him, her eyes moving from his face, down his beautiful body, to where she could see him hard and ready for her. Heat flared between her thighs, and she felt the need deep within her.  
Ignoring that need, just for now, Elain went higher on her knees, running both of her hands through Lucien’s hair, tugging on it gently. She pressed herself to him, allowing him to press his lips to her chest, and she let her eyes close in pleasure when she felt his hot tongue at her breast. Tightening her hands in his hair, she let out a groan before leaning back, out of his reach. Lucien looked as if he were about to protest the distance, but Elain brought her hands back around to his shoulders and then traced them down his chest again, her nails leaving small red marks as she did so. Seeing those marks, Elain paused for a moment. She hadn’t meant to actually cause pain, but Lucien was looking at her with a half-sleepy seductive look in his eyes, and she forgot all about the scratches. He reached for her again, and Elain shifted a little further back on his knees. 

“This is an interesting, cruel side of you, my love…” he purred, and Elain smiled.

“It’s only cruel if I don’t give it to you in the end…” she replied and he raised an eyebrow. 

“Will you?” he asked, a smirk spreading across his face, “Give it to me?”

Elain leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips “Only if you give it to _me_.”

Lucien’s laugh was low and wicked and Elain grinned at him again before slipping from his lap to the floor, where she knelt on the plush rug, her hands moving down his thighs. “Petal…?”

“Yes?” she asked, innocently, rubbing her hands over his skin. She looked up at him, watching as he tilted his head, clearly trying to decide if he should do something or just let her continue what she wanted to do. She smiled at him again when he met her eyes, and she watched his expression change when she carefully took hold of his hard length. “Something you’d like to say?” she asked, licking her lips as she kept her eyes on his face. Lucien shook his head, his lips parted as he drew a quick breath, and his hands went to the cushions beneath himself as he took a firm grip. “Are you sure…?” she asked, her hand beginning to work him slowly. 

“Oh… _vixen_ …” he murmured, resting his head back against the couch. Elain watched him, listening to his heart in her head as she quickened her hand, smiling when she heard his heart race to keep pace. She licked her lips again, lowering her gaze to what she was doing, before she bent over him to take him into her mouth. She kept her actions teasing, kissing and licking, and taking just the head of him into her mouth, Elain listened to Lucien’s response. 

The string of expletives that Lucien let out made Elain look up at him. “You would use such language in front of a Lady?” she asked, trying to resist a smile. 

Lucien actually looked a little ashamed. “I apologise…” he breathed, and Elain grinned at him before bending again and taking more of him into her mouth. She felt one of his hands slide into her hair as she bent lower and she slid both of her own hands up his thighs as she allowed him to gently guide her movements. 

*

Clenching his teeth to keep any further words from spilling from him, Lucien carefully lifted Elain from himself. She looked confused for a moment and, as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, he was nearly convinced to allow her to continue what she had been doing.

“What…” she fell silent when Lucien got to his feet and pulled her up with him. 

“If I let you continue there…” he told her, his hands settling on her shoulders as he backed her across the room, “We’d never get off the couch…”

Elain’s dark eyes were on his face and she was looking at him with what he could only have described as adoration. “Would that be bad?” she asked. 

“No…” he pressed his lips to her forehead, backing her against the wall, “but… I think this would be even better.”

“Better…?” Elain tilted her head, her gorgeous hair tumbling over one shoulder, as she looked up at him, and Lucien pressed himself against her. “What are you going to do?” she asked, and Lucien could hear the barely controlled desire in her voice. He could feel that she wanted him, the desire meeting him down the bond. He could smell it too, just as strongly as he could hear it in her voice. His own body responded, and he was unable to help rubbing himself against her, his lips moving to her cheek as he breathed her in.

“What am I going to do?” he purred, one hand moving down her body. He slid his hand between her legs, smirking at Elain’s sudden hitch in breathing. “What would you like me to do…?”

“I…” one of her hands gripped his shoulder and, when she widened her stance for him, allowing him better access to her, Lucien pushed his fingers inside of her. “I…” Elain’s head tilted back to rest against the wall, and Lucien dipped his head to bring his lips to her throat. “ahh…”

Lucien attached his lips to Elain’s throat, sucking at the skin, when he felt her bend her knees slightly, as if trying to ride his fingers. She groaned and he pulled his fingers from her, sliding his hands down her thighs before he lifted her to himself. Elain wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist as Lucien pressed her more firmly into the wall. 

He lifted his head from her throat, meeting her eyes an instant before he pushed himself into her. Elain groaned again, her arms tightening around him, and Lucien couldn’t hold in a soft gasp of his own. He had been inside of her so many times before, yet couldn’t deny that this was different. Bringing one of his hands from her thigh up to her cheek, Lucien held her in place, his eyes holding her gaze as he thrust into her again.

Elain’s need for him washed over him, racing down the bond more powerfully than anything he’d felt from her before and, as she clutched at him, as she let out one small gasp after another as he pushed into her over and over, Lucien realised that the steady beat he could hear in his head was not his own heartbeat, but hers. Shock coursed through him at the realisation and he gave another gasp. “I… I can hear you.” He breathed, “I can hear your heart…”


	169. Chapter One Hundred and Sixty-Nine

**Chapter 169**

Elain gripped Lucien’s shoulders tightly. His hands were tight on her, one at her thigh, holding her up and against the wall, and the other at her cheek, keeping her face where he could see her. He was moving quickly, steadily, thrusting into her over and over, and Elain was unable to help the small sounds she was making in response. She really didn’t think that she needed to, however, as she could fee Lucien’s reaction each time he heard a new sound from her. His heartrate would increase, and he would smile, and she knew that he loved it. With every small cry she made, Elain could feel Lucien’s excitement and pleasure slamming into her down the bond. She gave up trying to hold in any of her sounds, and just allowed everything washing over her to take hold.

Holding Lucien’s gaze, Elain focused on what he was doing. She tilted her hips as much as she was able in the position in which she was being held, and she grinned when he groaned in appreciation. He didn’t so much as alter his rhythm however, pushing into her again and again, and Elain held more tightly to his shoulders when he gave a low growl.

With every thrust Lucien made into Elain’s body, she could see the bond between them growing brighter and brighter. She could feel it becoming stronger and more vibrant. Where it had previously been a pale golden thread, it was now shining and unmistakable. It flared and flared again, and Elain’s breath caught in her throat. It was as plain to her now as one of her own limbs, and there would never be a chance that she would lose it or have to search to find it. Again and again, brighter and brighter, and she felt tears welling in her eyes. “The… the bond…” she gasped, one of her hands shifting from Lucien’s shoulder to his cheek. 

“I know…” he sounded breathless, and his eyes remained on her face. “I know…” A moment later, Lucien lengthened his strokes and Elain’s eyes closed. She tilted her head back against the wall, her heartbeat synching to each move Lucien made as she felt the bond grow stronger and stronger. This was what she had wanted. For what felt like so long now, she had wanted more from the bond, and this was it. Relief flowed through her now, and she slid her hand from Lucien’s cheek, back into his hair, the silky texture of it sending tingles throughout her body. 

“I love you…” she breathed, clutching at him as her back moved against the wall, “I love you…”

“Mine…” he snarled, his lips finding hers an instant later. Elain parted her lips for him instantly, allowing him to deepen the kiss as he continued to move inside of her. She heard him groan into the kiss, and Elain tightened her hand in his hair, before his lips shifted and moved to her throat. When she felt the brush of his teeth against her skin, Elain shuddered as her ears began to ring and light flashed before her eyes. 

_She was sitting in a bright field, flowers blowing idly in the gentle breeze, and she found herself laughing. Running through the grass toward her was a female youngling, and Elain opened her arms for her, catching her when the youngling launched herself forward. When she got a look at her face, Elain’s heart soared. Her eyes moved over the delicate little face with a small nose, wide russet eyes, and pointed ears peeking out from within long honey-brown hair._

_Elain gave a slight squeal then when two more small arms enveloped her from behind, and someone pressed a sloppy kiss to her cheek. Turning, she smiled at the grinning male youngling, younger than the female, who tumbled down in front of her. Helping him to his feet, Elain stroked his ruby hair back from his face, meeting the wide brown eyes that looked at her with joy from beneath that vibrant hair._

_Another arm snaked around Elain from behind and, recognising Lucien’s touch, she leaned back against him. Settling together, Elain laughed again then, when both younglings rushed forward again, piling atop the two of them.  
_

Gasping at the vision, Elain’s heart filled with emotions that she couldn’t even begin to name. She looked at Lucien and, wanting to share what she had seen with him, she brought one of her hands to his cheek again. Not really knowing what she was doing, Elain focused intently upon the bond, and the images she had seen in the vision. She concentrated on the faces of the younglings, so clearly belonging to Lucien and herself, and she tried to push those images toward him. The bond glowed brightly in her mind, and was easy to grasp. 

When Lucien’s eyes opened to meet hers, Elain knew that she had succeeded. “Is… is that…” his voice sounded choked.

She nodded, her fingers caressing his cheek. He stopped then, and Elain’s breath caught at the sight of tears in his russet eye. Carefully, Lucien set Elain back on her feet and she watched his face as his expression crumpled. He sank down then, and Elain went with him to the plush rug. Rubbing her hand over his back when she touched him and found him trembling, Elain realised that Lucien was crying. “Love…” she breathed, wrapping her arms around him. The bond flared between them then, and Lucien’s ache hit her. His yearning for what she had shown him, his desire to have that life, and his relief at knowing that some day he would have it, all reached Elain and she tightened her arms around him. “Home…” she whispered, “Family…”

He nodded, his head still bowed, and Elain pressed a kiss to his shoulder. “Yes…”

“That’s our future…” she told him, and then his arms wrapped around her, sliding around her waist and pulling her closer to himself. Elain leaned into him. 

“That’s our present…” Lucien lifted his head to meet her gaze, and Elain brought her hand to his cheek again, brushing a tear from his scar. “You and I…” he told her. “We are family.”

“We are.” She agreed, reaching for the bond in her mind and caressing it gently. She tilted her head when she saw Lucien shiver, and she smiled. “Did you feel that?”

“Of course.” He sat up straighter, pulling her into his arms. Elain smiled at him when he lifted her with him as he then got to his feet. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Elain allowed Lucien to carry her across the room toward the enormous bed. “What do you say, we move somewhere more comfortable?” he asked, his lips quirking in a wicked smirk.

“I think that sounds fantastic, love.” She kept her eyes on his face when he crawled onto the bed, carrying her to the centre where he lay her gently, moving down over her as Elain settled back against the many pillows. “Are you alright?” she asked, her hand caressing his cheek once more, and Lucien nodded, bringing his lips carefully to hers. 

“I am.” He murmured, his hands moving over her, and setting her blood alight. Elain wrapped her legs around him, hooking one of her feet behind his knee. 

“Good…” 

Lucien kissed her again, and she felt him licking teasingly at her as he adjusted himself over her. Opening to him, Elain closed her eyes, sliding a hand into his hair as he slowly pushed himself into her once more. Her hand tightened in his hair as he began to move, and she allowed herself a soft groan. 

The bond flared again, and Elain’s breath caught in her throat. She could feel both of them. As Lucien moved, Elain’s brain tried to keep up with everything happening. She could feel the silky bedspread beneath her, feel as her skin moved over it, but she could also feel how good it felt to _be_ inside of her, to move within that heat. She let out a low moan, and tried to focus on just one of those perspectives. “Lucien..” she breathed, “Lucien…”

“Got you, Petal…” he held her cradled to himself as he moved, and Elain just clung to him.


	170. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy

**Chapter 170**

Elain awoke when the sun was high. Turning her head, she found herself wrapped in a large fluffy blanket, that Lucien had tucked around them, and his eyes firmly on her face. She smiled at him, comfortable and warm, and she heard his heart quicken when he noticed that she was now awake. 

“Petal…” he tilted his head enough to bring his lips to her forehead, and Elain snuggled closer. 

“My love…” she breathed, finding him beneath the blanket and tucking an arm around his waist. “I must get up.” She told him, lifting her eyes to his face. Something moved behind his russet eye then, and she felt his hold on her tighten. 

“No…”

“I must.” She smiled, “I need to go to the bathroom…”

A small snarl escaped him, and he shook his head. Elain looked at him, recalling something Viviane had once told her about males being possessive during the frenzy. Lucien appeared to be trying to keep it leashed, but she could feel his grip on her, and knew that he did not at all want her leaving the bed or his sight. He did not want her where he could not reach and touch her. She needed to give him something else to focus on. “Mine…” he breathed, his arm drawing her to himself.

“As always.” She replied, “I… I am hungry…” Elain watched his face, waiting for the moment that he would take those words in. “Would you get me something to eat?” she asked. 

“You’re hungry?” he murmured, his eyes flicking back and forth across her face. Elain nodded. 

“Yes.” She smiled winningly at him, “Would you get me some breakfast?”

“Of course.” Lucien pushed himself to his elbow, his eyes on her and Elain smiled more widely. 

“Thank you.” She said, leaning forward to press her lips to his. “I’ll go to the bathroom while you do that, and when I come out, we will have breakfast together.”

“As you wish, Petal.”

Elain slipped out from beneath the blanket and padded quickly into the bathroom, pleased that she had worked out a way to work around Lucien’s possessiveness. Giving him a way to take care of her that would distract his need to keep his hands on her had been effective, and she would need to remember to tell Viviane of it. She wondered if feeding her would work again, or if she could need to come up with something else next time.

When she came back into the bedroom, Elain picked up a lacy slip that she had tucked by the bed and pulled it on for some semblance of modesty. She did not miss Lucien’s eyes move over her when she did so, but he made no complaint. He also made no effort to cover himself up which, if Elain were being honest with herself, she also did not mind. Sitting at the small dining table, Elain watched as Lucien carried a bowl toward her and set it down. 

“Delicious.” She said, eyeing the contents and seeing that he had cut up several pieces of fruit. He also set two cups of juice before them before he took up his own seat. Elain noticed the way his eyes stuck on her then, as if unable to look away, and she got up before sliding into his lap and wrapping one of her arms around behind his neck as she got comfortable. Lucien’s hands were instantly on her, and they traced her body for several moments, as if making up for the time she had been out of his reach. When he settled, she smiled at him. “Thank you.” She said gently, “…for breakfast.”

Lucien reached forward with one hand and picked up half a strawberry. Elain’s eyes followed it as he brought it up, touching it gently to her lips. Opening her mouth, Elain allowed him to place the strawberry on her tongue before she closed her lips and chewed it. She watched as Lucien smiled, pleased, and she pressed a gentle kiss to his scar before swallowing. “Thank you.”

He popped a strawberry of his own into his mouth before reaching for another to feed to her. Elain allowed him to continue feeding her, and every time he gave her a piece of fruit she would press a kiss to his scar. Her hands moved over his skin as she chewed, and she enjoyed the way that he watched her. The need she had felt the night before was returning, and she could feel a throbbing between her thighs, her need to feel him inside of her coming back with a vengeance. The moment that she recognised the feeling for what it was, she knew that Lucien had noticed as well. His heartbeat quickened in her ears and his hand at her waist took a more firm grip of her. 

When he moved, Elain thought that he might do something about it, but instead he reached for the bowl again, picking up a blueberry before bringing it to her lips. She opened her mouth and he pushed it inside, his eyes holding hers all the while. Quickly, Elain chewed and swallowed. 

“Lucien…” she breathed, her own voice low and strange to her ears. 

“Petal…” he sounded so unaffected that Elain looked sharply at him. Was he not feeling this?

“C-can’t you feel it?” she asked, practically panting with the effort it took to keep herself still in his lap. 

“Feel what?” he asked, and Elain swallowed thickly. 

“The… the…” she broke off, not knowing what to say. How could he not feel it? Couldn’t he feel her through the bond? Elain went to get to her feet, but Lucien had grabbed her faster than lightning, faster than Elain could follow. His hands gripped her shoulders as he turned her and then bent her quickly over the table, his hands moving up her thighs, taking the lacy slip with them and leaving her bare to himself. 

Biting her lip, Elain groaned when one of his hands went between her thighs, spreading her wide for himself as he pushed himself up against her from behind. 

“Of course I feel it…” he whispered, his breath hot against the back of Elain’s neck as he bent over her, “I’ve been able to feel it since you came out of that Cauldron.”

“Uh…” Elain spread her legs wantonly for him, knowing that she was practically dripping with desire. The need to feel him inside of her, filling her, was nearly maddening. “Please…” she groaned, “Lucien…”

“You want me, love?” he asked, his voice light again, even as he pressed himself to her, and Elain could feel how hard he was already. 

“Yes…” she knew she was begging, but she didn’t care, “Yes… now…” It was almost an ache now, and it was growing stronger by the moment. 

“Patience…” Lucien’s voice was barely a whisper, but Elain didn’t care. Her attention was focused on one of his hands sliding down to her hip as she felt him adjust himself behind her a moment before he had lined himself up and thrust into her with one fluid stroke.

“ _Ohhh_ …” She didn’t even try to contain the shameless moan that spilled from her and, when Lucien withdrew slightly, Elain reached up to take a firm grip of the edge of the table, before he thrust back inside of her. “ _Ahh_ …” she squeezed her eyes shut, panting again when both of Lucien’s hands went to her hips, gripping her and holding her in place as he repeated his action. Elain moaned again, her heart racing and her breath catching when he began a steady rhythm. 

“Is… this… what… you… wanted?” his voice was rough, and that alone sent shivers of satisfaction through Elain. She nodded, her hands tightening on the edge of the table, as she let him pull her into a better position before himself. 

“Yes…” Elain rested her forehead against the smooth surface of the table, her hands maintaining their grip as Lucien continued to fuck her. This was exactly what she had wanted, the need that had arisen in her was just about singing now, and she allowed herself to enjoy everything he was doing, murmuring her encouragement all the while.


	171. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-One

**Chapter 171**

Her head was in his lap and Lucien idly combed his fingers through Elain’s hair as they lay on a rug outside under the tree. This felt familiar, and he thought back to when they had used to spend time together in Rhysand’s garden in the Night Court. Elain turned the page of her book, and Lucien smiled as he watched her. If he could have seen how they would end up back then, Lucien didn’t think he would have believed it. When they had first begun spending time together, talking and getting to know one another, Lucien would have dearly loved to have been able to touch her. Now, she was resting her head in his lap while she read, and he couldn’t have been happier.

After they had finished with their breakfast, and other activities, they had spend some time cleaning the mess of fruit and juice they had spilled all over the floor, and then spent the rest of the morning napping. Lucien had been more than a little amused by Elain’s reaction earlier. It had tickled him to see her so openly and desperately want him, with a need that she clearly couldn’t control. He hoped that he got to see that more often, and he had every intention of giving her exactly what she wanted each and every time.

He combed his fingers through her hair again, smiling at Elain when she looked up at him. “Are you not reading your own book?” she asked, and Lucien shook his head. His own book sat on the rug upon which they lay. 

“No, I’ve been looking at you…” Elain’s mouth opened in shock, and Lucien smiled more widely. With his free hand he gestured around them, at the tree and the garden and the sky. “… you are the most stunning thing out here.”

“Court-trained charmer.” She murmured, looking at her book again. Lucien’s grin turned wicked when he heard her heart quicken nonetheless. He had so much more insight into her now that he could hear hers like she had always been able to hear his. “…what are you doing?” her voice was curious and amused, as Lucien let his hand shift down to her shoulder, and then trace down one of her arms. 

“Listening to your heart…” 

“Oh…” She sat up then, turning to face him. “Do you like it?”

“Being able to hear your heart?” he asked, and she nodded, her pretty eyes on his face. “I do.” He replied, sliding closer to her and lifting a hand to her cheek. “It is comforting. Like you once said…”

“It is.” Elain brought one of her own hands up to rest against his chest, and he knew that she wanted to feel his heartbeat while she could hear it. “I love it.” He leaned forward to kiss her gently, his own heart quickening when Elain’s arms came up to wrap around his neck, and he slid his free around her waist to pull her into his lap. “You know…” Elain breathed, pulling back just enough to meet his eyes. One of her gentle hands came up to his cheek, and Lucien held her gaze, “Your face… is my very favourite face.”

He laughed. “That… is not what I expected you to say.” He told her, and Elain was smiling at him in a way that heated his blood. She looked as if she were about to say something, but she laughed instead, her eyes moving across his face again and he felt her fingers carefully moving across his scar. “I… don’t know how you can love it.”

Elain scrunched her nose as she looked at him. “I… don’t love that this was done to you.” Her fingers moved over his scar again from his brow to his jaw, “But it is part of you now. And, this face…” she smiled at him, “Is the face of my mate.” She leaned into him, pressing a kiss to his nose, “It’s the face I see in my dreams… and it’s the face that I want to see every morning when I wake up…” She wrapped her arms around his neck again, “And it is my favourite.”

Lucien didn’t know what to say to her in response so he just kissed her, enjoying the way that she opened to him, inviting him to push further, and he did. Laying her carefully back against the rug, Lucien moved over Elain, his hands skimming over her skin lightly, and he greatly enjoyed listening to the way that her heart had begun to race. “You know…” he murmured, his hands sliding up her thighs, bringing her dress with them. “I once had a dream about making love to you under that tree in Rhys’ garden…”

“I know.” Elain’s reply was a soft as the breath she released, and Lucien raised an eyebrow at her. How had she known? He didn’t think he had told her. “It was while you were gone…” she went on. “The dream woke me one night.”

“Oh…”

“I found it strangely comforting.” She smiled, “I liked knowing that you were still dreaming about me, because I hadn’t been able to feel you while you were so far away, and I had only been able to hear your heart when I really listened…”

Lucien was desperately trying to remember the details of that dream. It had been well before she had admitted that she loved him. He wondered if there had been anything in the dream he should have apologised for. From what he could remember, however, it had been pretty simple. He’d had a fantasy that Elain had wanted him, had loved him. “What did you think?” he asked, “about the dream?”

“You wanted me to want you.” She said softly, “That seemed to be the point.” He nodded and she smiled up at him as he felt her hook her legs around him. “… and I do.”

“I know.” He brushed his lips across her cheek. “I can feel you do.”

“Your dream has literally come true…” he could hear the teasing note in her voice as one of her hands moved up his back. 

“I don’t know…” he murmured into her ear as his own hands went down to begin undoing his pants, “I think part of the excitement of the dream was that anyone might have returned from the House of Wind and come across us…” 

“I’m glad that’s not a possibility out here.” He felt her laugh as her grip tightened on him.

“It might be…” he shifted into the correct position over her, his lips still at her ear, “If I make you scream loud enough, someone might just come to check…”

“Why don’t you try…”

Lucien needed no further encouragement than those words, and pushed himself as deeply into her as he could. His hands lifted to clutch at her, one at Elain’s shoulder, the other at her waist. The soft grunt she made urged him on, and he set about a quick rhythm, wondering just how loudly he could make her scream. He followed the beating of her heart as a guide, pushing further and further until Elain took hold of a handful of his hair and tugged. 

Before he could ask her what she wanted, she had pulled him down and rolled them until she sat atop him, grinning down at him as she adjusted herself. He could do nothing but stare up at her in awe as she braced herself with a hand pressed to his chest as she moved over him. Her eyes slid closed as her honey-brown hair cascaded down over one shoulder, moving as she did, like a wild thing, and Lucien found himself unable to keep his hands off of her. One went directly into that hair, the other sliding up her side to her breast. Elain’s eyes opened then, holding his for a moment, before they shifted and looked up and past him. She continued to move on him, fast and determined, and Lucien realised that’s she was looking at the flowerbeds. He watched her bite her lower lip, trying to maintain her focus, but then he couldn’t pay attention to anything other than what she was doing to him, and he wondered if he wouldn’t be the one to scream loud enough to bring someone down on them to check if anything was wrong.


	172. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Two

**Chapter 172**

Somehow, Lucien and Elain had managed to keep their hands off of one another long enough to make dinner. After they had come inside from under the tree, they had spent some of the afternoon dozing and reading, before Lucien had insisted that they have something substantial to eat. Elain, knowing that they did need something nourishing in order to make up for the energy they were using, had agreed.

They had worked well together, cutting and getting everything prepared to go into the oven, and Elain had been a little surprised by how well Lucien was holding himself together. When his hand grazed her lower back, she grinned and turned to look at him. “I knew you couldn’t do it.” She said, a laugh in her voice. 

“Couldn’t do what?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her. 

“Couldn’t not touch me.”

“Oh, Petal.” He winked, “I think it’s more that I don’t want to not touch you.”

“Ah…” She tipped the chopped vegetables into the tray and reached for the herbs he had been cutting up. 

“Unless…” he breathed, and she felt him step up behind her, his lips ghosting over her ear, “you want me to not touch you.”

“Well, you know that’s not true.” Elain scoffed, sprinkling the herbs across the vegetables in the baking tray. She smiled when Lucien’s lips dipped to her throat, and she leaned back into him for a moment. The feel of Lucien at her back had always been particularly pleasant. 

“Are you done with this?” he reached past her to the baking tray, and Elain nodded her head. Lucien picked the tray up and moved away from her. Elain turned to watch him approach the oven and she tilted her head in appreciation as he bent and slid the tray onto one of the racks.

“You didn’t really think that, right?”

“That you don’t want me touching you?” he gave her a twisted smile before shaking his head. “Of course not. I can feel you…”

Elain lifted herself up onto the kitchen bench, her eyes still on Lucien. “You do keep yourself in check very well…”

“I’ve had a lot of practice.” He stood straight, wiping his hands on his pants as he looked at her. 

Elain held a hand out to him, waiting as he hesitated before moving closer and taking it in one of his own, “You don’t have to anymore.” She told him, “Lucien… you can let it go.” She could feel his wariness, mixed with some light disbelief. “Lucien… I am your mate.”

“Yes…”

“You don’t have to keep anything restrained. I know you hold yourself on some kind of leash…”

“That… is…” he didn’t seem to be able to look at her, and Elain frowned, squeezing his hand. 

“Lucien?” She pulled him closer to the bench. “Do you think you’ll hurt me?”

“I…” she watched him lift a hand to the back of his neck, and she could feel his uncertainty, “I don’t want it to be like the Rite… with Ianthe.”

“What?” Elain just about recoiled. Was he comparing her to that Priestess?

“Uncontrolled.” He said, “The magic I took into myself for the Right made me … well… you saw how I was.” His eyes finally met hers again, and Elain couldn’t look away. “If I was like that with you…”

“You think the bond would make you like that?”

“What if it does?” he asked. 

“I know you wouldn’t hurt me.”

“I… don’t know…”

“Why would it make you someone else?” She asked.

“What if that is me?”

“No…” Elain brought her free hand up to his shoulder, “I know who you are. I can feel who you are within me. We are connected. I know you would never hurt me.” Still able to feel his doubt, Elain lifted her other hand to his cheek, drawing him closer. “Lucien. I know it.” She reached for the bond between them, trying to push her confidence in who he was toward him, watching his face and waiting to see when he felt it. 

“If…” he drew a shaky breath, and paused for a few moments, “If you’re certain…” his voice was soft, “and it’s something you really want me to try…”

“I don’t want you leashing any of yourself from me.” He nodded then, and Elain smiled, leaning forward to kiss him. “You are my mate.” She breathed, “That means I get all of you.” She felt relief from him down the bond then, and she smiled, pressing her lips to his. 

“Alright, Petal.” He said, wrapping an arm around her waist, and lifting her from the kitchen bench. “What do you say we try out this enormous bath while our dinner cooks?”

“I think that’s a fine idea.” She replied. Elain had been eager to get into that tub since Ashk had first shown it to her. The thing was practically a pool, and she wanted to know just how deep they could fill it.

As Lucien set about getting the water going, Elain began stripping her clothes off. She tossed them into a corner before swinging her legs around over the edge of the tub, and grinning at Lucien when he eyed her. Until that moment, Elain had not noticed the different levels within the tub. There were several steps down into it, and around the edge was some sort of seat, presumably to rest upon when one grew tired of standing in hot water. 

When Lucien joined her in the tub, Elain wasted no time in wrapping herself around him, enjoying his heat as much as the hot water. She had discovered that when she stood in the middle of the tub, the water came up to her chest, and she figured it would take her maybe four or five strokes to swim across it. A pool was exactly how she would describe this bathtub. It was completely elaborate, and it was very Helion, she decided. Although, when she took in just how much joy Lucien was getting from it, perhaps it was a father and son thing after all. 

“You like this.” She said, and Lucien grinned at her. 

“I do.” His hands moved down her back to squeeze at her arse, and he grinned at her. “Don’t you?”

“I suppose it is very luxurious.” She admitted, her eyes not leaving his face as he carried her to the ledge at the side and sat her on it. Elain leaned back against the wall as Lucien’s hands slid down to her thighs, parting them as he pressed closer. She watched as he evidently thought about something before his grin grew wider and his eyes flicked up to her face for a moment. “What are you thinking of doing?” she asked, her voice low to her own ears. Her heart quickened as he sank lower in the water, and he winked at her with his good eye. “What…” When he went beneath the water, his hands sliding beneath her thighs, she understood. “Lucien…” Elain gasped when he pulled her to the edge of the seat and she felt his mouth on her, “Oh…” Both of her hands flung out to the side and she gripped the edge of the tub to keep herself from melting and sinking into the water, especially as Lucien was pulling her toward himself, as if he might devour her entirely. She let out a cry when she felt his tongue push into her, and she gripped the edge of the tub more tightly. Not having any idea how Lucien was able to hold his breath for so long, Elain just allowed herself to enjoy what he was doing for her. 

His hands moved down her legs, caressing and massaging as he worked, and Elain’s eyes closed. She could hear his heart thundering in her head, and she knew that hers was racing to match. She didn’t know what was going to happen first, if she was going to go tumbling over her edge with a scream, or if her arms were going to give way from trying to hold herself out of the water, and she was going to go crashing down beneath the water, probably also with a scream. Lucien’s hands were firm on her as he moved back up her legs, but then he reappeared, dripping but looking pleased with himself and, it was with relief that Elain released the edge of the tub to wrap her shaking arms around his neck. He held her with one arm, and she felt his other hand slip between her thighs a moment later as he set about finishing with his fingers what he had begun with his mouth.


	173. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Three

**Chapter 173**

Curled up on the couch before the fireplace, Elain leaned into Lucien. Dinner had been most enjoyable, and they had decided that an evening together on the couch was in order. She gave a contented sigh when he wrapped a fluffy blanket around her, tucking her into himself more tightly, and she watched him as he flicked a hand at the fireplace an instant before flames burst to life within. 

“I wish that I could do that.” She breathed, and he slid an arm around her, holding her to his side. 

“I’ll tell you what.” He murmured, and Elain lay her head against his shoulder. “Any time you want a fire, I’ll make you one.”

“Any time?” she asked, and felt him nod. Elain smiled again, “My own personal little furnace…” Lucien laughed and she felt his lips brush her temple. 

“How about we refer to me as something more dashing…” he suggested. 

“Did you have anything in mind?” Elain looked up at him with a grin.

“O’marvellous and most impressive Lord of the Flame…”

Elain sat up, a small cackle escaping her as she looked at Lucien. “Is that so?” she asked, “What else do you have?”

“The extraordinary and exceedingly debonair…” Lucien wasn’t even done when Elain cracked up again, covering her face with one hand as she laughed. 

“You don’t like that one either?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her. “Alright, what do you have, then?”

Elain wrapped her arms around one of Lucien’s as she leaned into him again, looking up to meet his eyes as she thought. “Hmm…” she smiled, “Just the one.” When he raised a questioning eyebrow at her, waiting for her to tell him what it was, she smiled more widely. “Mate.”

“Ah.” Lucien smiled back at her, and Elain could feel his pleasure down the bond. He leaned into her then, pressing his lips to her forehead. “I like it.”

“I thought you might.”

“I love hearing you say it.” He murmured, his lips against her hair. “Say it again…”

Smiling to herself, Elain listened to his heart. “Mate…” That heartbeat, so strong in her head, increased in pace, and she felt another wave of pleasure wash over her down the bond. She felt him kiss her again and she repeated herself, “ _Mate_.”

Lucien moved suddenly, one of his arms going around and under Elain’s legs and he lifted her feet into his lap. She leaned back against the armrest, her eyes on him. She looked at the way that the fire lit up his vibrant ruby hair and, as he moved, it looked again like molten metal. When he looked at her, the firelight glinted off of his metallic eye, and Elain found herself almost transfixed by him. “How did I get such a beautiful _mate_?” she asked, and Lucien winked at her. 

“An extraordinary and exceedingly debonair one, too…”

“Humble, as well.” She met his eyes as he wrapped his hands around one of her feet and began to gently massage it. “ _Ohhh… oh…_ ” Tilting her head back against the headrest, Elain let out a pleasured groan, her eyes rolling in her head before she closed them. “That is fantastic.”

“I am so glad that you enjoy it.”

“How… are you so good at that…?”

“I’m good at many things.” He replied, winking at her, and Elain felt herself blush. “I’ve had a lot of education…”

“Yes, but this specifically…”

“The Dawn Court.” He told her, “I’ve been there several times over the years… and I used to know this faerie who was a bit of a healer. He had travelled all over Prythian. He’d picked up several different techniques from all corners… he taught me some of them.”

“Is he still there?” Elain asked, and Lucien shook his head. 

“I heard that he never returned from the last trip he went on. Vanished, they say.”

“I’m sorry…”

Lucien nodded his head in acknowledgement, and moved his hands to her other foot. Elain’s eyes closed again and she bit back another groan. She could feel how pleased he was with himself, and the reactions he was drawing from her, and she decided that she wouldn’t try to hold in any further sounds. It had always been clear to her that Lucien very much enjoyed the sounds that she made, and she wanted to encourage him to remove the leash he kept on himself, so that meant that she should set an example.

The next several minutes were spent with Lucien expertly moving his hands over Elain’s foot and up her ankle while she just about writhed in pleasure on the couch. When he eventually finished, Elain lifted her eyes to his face again, knowing that her own was slightly flushed. “I have something for you.” She told him, and he gave her a lascivious smirk. She half kicked at him in response, shaking her head. “Something else.”

“Oh?”

Elain slipped her hand down the side of the couch, reaching for the small box she had stashed there earlier, when Lucien had been dishing up their dinner. She could feel his eyes on her, but she remained determined upon her task until her fingers found the firm edge of the box and she pulled it out. “I had this made for you,” she breathed, “In celebration… of… us… the bond… our future together, but also your past and who you are and how you came to be who you are.” She met his surprised eyes and held the box out. 

Lucien took it, not a word coming from him. He then opened the box and stared at the garnet and sunstone wrist cuff inside. Elain heard his heartbeat just about go through the roof. “It… it’s to represent…” She drew a shuddery breath, her eyes still on his face, trying to read his expression. “The garnet is the Autumn Court… and the sunstone…” she bit her lip, “Day…”

Without a word, Lucien lay the box in his lap and turned away. He reached for the edge of the couch and over it, and Elain heard him rummaging through his pack before he sat up again and held a small box out to her. 

Curiosity flooded Elain and she quickly opened it, staring at the sunstone ring she found inside. Speechless, she lifted her free hand to touch the garnet necklace she still wore, and her eyes met Lucien’s. They had had almost the same thought. Somehow, they had thought to celebrate this in the same way, and with the same symbolism. She watched as he slipped the wrist cuff on, his gentle fingers tracing the garnet and sunstones, and she pulled the ring he had given her from its box and slipped it onto her finger. 

They were the same, even in this. “… _Mate_.” She breathed, and Lucien’s adoration hit her down the bond with such force that it was as if her breath had been taken from her. Shuddering when he lifted a hand to lay over the garnet necklace that she wore, Elain reached for him, wanting to be closer. 

“Thank you.” He whispered, and she nodded. “This was perfect…” his hand brushed the cuff she had given him, and she smiled. 

“I can hardly believe we had the same idea.” She replied, and Lucien tilted his head. 

“I love it.” One of his hands came to her cheek, “and I love you.”

Elain shifted closer again until she could wrap her arms around his neck. She didn’t know what else to say to him, and was more than happy that she didn’t have to think of anything when Lucien leaned in and closed the space between them with a deep kiss. She never took the garnet necklace off, and she knew that the sunstone ring would get much the same treatment. She felt as if wearing them would be like having Lucien with her at all times, even when he was elsewhere, and especially if he was far enough away that feeling him through the bond became difficult. 

When he lifted her into his lap, Elain went willingly, her hands sliding up and down his arms from his shoulder to the cuff she could feel warm against his skin. Lucien didn’t break the kiss however, and Elain had no more intention of it than he did.


	174. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Four

**Chapter 174**

Elain awoke in the morning to find Lucien sitting beside her in the bed, his shoulders resting back against the ornate headboard, as he balanced a book on his knees. He hadn’t noticed that she was awake, and Elain took the opportunity to just watch her mate. She couldn’t see the title of the book that he was reading, but she could see that he was engaged with it, as he chewed his lower hip, his eyes focused intently, tracing the pages quickly before he turned to the next one. Elain liked how Lucien looked when he was truly focused, and she couldn’t help a small smile. Watching him think sent warmth throughout her, and it was one of her favourite expressions. It always reminded her how very clever he was. She liked it. 

Lucien must have sensed her, because his eyes suddenly flicked her way and he smiled. “Awake, Petal.”

“Mhmm…” she reached for him, and he dropped a hand to meet hers. “What are you reading?”

“Oh, nothing too saucy.” He closed the book with his free hand. “Just a bit about the old trade routes and their impacts in the first few centuries since their formation.” He made a face, and tilted his head, but then went on a little more quickly, “They really played a part in uniting Prythian, and the impact they had on the politics of the Courts was huge. Alliances formed based on trade and…” he broke off and grinned at her, and Elain noticed a faint blush stain his cheeks. 

“You’re really into this stuff, aren’t you?”

“It’s … fascinating.” He replied, still grinning, and Elain pushed herself up on her elbow. 

“Good thing that you’re getting to play a part as Helion’s heir.” She said, “They are lucky to have you…” her fingers traced the cuff at his wrist, and she saw the pleased look he gave her as she felt his reaction to her words down the bond. 

“Well, if I am going to be helpful to Helion, and be able to do my duty, I do need to know as much as I can….”

“I know you will be perfect.” She said, sitting up further. Lucien smiled at her again before swinging his legs around and off the side of the bed. 

“I think we should have something for breakfast.” He said and Elain scrambled to follow him. 

Lucien had insisted on making the breakfast, so Elain busied herself with sitting and watching him. She allowed her eyes to move over her perfect mate, and she made sure to show every thought on her face, and send every emotion down the bond to Lucien so that he knew exactly what she was thinking. She also enjoyed every glance and smirk he sent her way as he cooked, evidently enjoying everything he was getting from her. 

When he set a plate down in front of her at the table, Elain reached up to his shoulder, pulling him down into a soft kiss by way of thanks. She loved the way one of his own hands came up to her cheek, caressing her as he returned the kiss before he straightened and went to get his own plate. 

Once they had eaten, Lucien disappeared into the bathroom to get cleaned up and ready for the day, while Elain pottered around the rest of the room. She tidied the area by the couches, returning cushions they had kicked away to the couch, and straightening everything so that the place appeared tidy. She opened the door to the little garden outside, hoping to get some fresh air into the room, and she pulled aside several of the curtains in order to get some light inside. 

When she had determined that the room was about as neat as it was going to be, Elain returned to the bed and flopped back down upon it, staring at the roof. Lifting her hand, she turned her gaze upon the sandstone ring that Lucien had given her the night before. She would have put money on the bet that the jeweller who had made this ring had been the same one she had gone to for the cuff that she had given Lucien. The style was the same, and both pieces had the same sunlit feel about them. She wondered if the jeweller had realised that he had been making two pieces to be exchanged by a pair. Making a mental note for when this was over, Elain decided that she would seek the faerie out again and let him know. 

Bringing her hand up to trace her fingers across the garnet necklace she wore, Elain wondered what her sisters would think about she and Lucien having the same idea. Blinking then, she remembered that Feyre was likely gone, having returned to the Night Court with Rhys when he and the other High Lords had left the Day Court. At least she would be able to show Nesta, as her elder sister had promised to stay until after the frenzy. Elain wondered if Cassian had stayed also. How many days had it been? Elain wasn’t entirely certain that she remembered. 

Allowing her fingers to trail down her body from the necklace, Elain closed her eyes. Her own touch wasn’t as good as Lucien’s, and she focused on sending that thought down the bond to him. Feeling desire flood her at the thought, Elain continued to trail her hand over herself, passing her ribs and stomach and then moving between her legs. Touching herself gently, Elain was careful to send each and every thought and emotion to Lucien. She wanted him to know exactly what she was doing, and she wanted him to know that she was allowing him access to her every reaction. She would keep encouraging him to loosen the leash with which he held himself, to throw it away entirely. He was her mate, after all, and she wanted all of him as he should be. 

The faint stirring of desire reached her then, and she heard Lucien moving about the bathroom. He had evidently noticed what she had been sending him, and she knew that he was about to return. The feeling from him grew hotter and hotter, and Elain found herself unable to remove her hand from between her legs. Until she had him in front of her, his hands ready to take over, she would continue to take care of her own desires herself. 

After a moment, the bathroom door burst open and Elain watched Lucien strode out. His frame was impressive in the doorway, and he was completely naked. Elain could also see that he was completely hard. Her breath caught in her throat at the intensity she felt from him, and at the look in his eyes when they found her and pinned her to the bed as he crossed the room in several quick strides. 

This was new, she realised. The intensity she could feel from him was coming her way in almost blistering waves, and she could hear Lucien’s heartbeat thundering in her head. She didn’t know if she was imagining it, but she rather thought the need pulsing between her thighs had matched itself to his heartbeat, and everything in her screamed at her to touch him. This was him, she realised. This was Lucien unleashed, and she wanted him so very badly. 

“…Lucien…” she breathed, finally able to pull her hand away from herself and sit up on her elbows. His eyes just followed her, russet and gold, tracing her every move. Elain watched the way his chest rose and fell with every breath, and she took in the way his corded muscles beneath his skin tensed as he held himself still. Her mouth went dry just looking at him. 

“Petal…” he tilted his head as he moved around the side of the bed, his eyes never leaving her. Elain watched him, noting the way that he moved was graceful and almost predatory. He stopped then, just looking at her, and for a moment she thought that he had leashed himself again, but then his eyes went to her face. She understood then that this wasn’t Lucien hesitating for fear of how he might be, this was her mate waiting for her consent, He wouldn’t touch her until she had agreed to it, and she smiled up at him. 

“Come here.” She said, reaching a hand toward him. And he did.


	175. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Five

**Chapter 175**

As Lucien moved over her, Elain lay back against the pillows. His eyes held hers, and she couldn’t so much as glance away, watching him as he approached. Lifting her head then, just a little, she met him in a searing kiss and every nerve in her body felt electrified. She could feel the power behind him, and within him, as his hands moved over her, practically trailing fire, and Elain tried to wrap her arms around him, wanting him closer. Unable to move however, Elain realised that Lucien’s hands had encircled her wrists and he held them pinned to the pillow by her head. 

When he broke the kiss to trail his lips across her cheek and down to her throat, Elain lifted her head a little. She swore that she could still feel his hands moving over her, leaving a hot trail of skin in their wake. Her eyes moves across what she could see of her side, her brain telling her that she should be able to see Lucien’s hand moving there, because she could certainly feel it, but there was no hand, and he currently held both of hers pinned with both of his own. 

“Lucien…” she gasped, “… how are you doing that…?” She felt his lips curl in a smirk against her throat before he licked at her with his tongue. 

“Doing what?” he asked, his voice coy. One of the phantom hands moved down between her legs, and Elain gave a startled gasp. 

“ _That_!”

He chuckled then, his lips moving to her ear. “Oh, do you like that?” his actual hands pulled hers higher, above her head, and he lifted his head so that he could look at her. Elain met his eyes, taking in the fire within them and she nodded. His smile twisted slightly, and she felt those phantom hands make their way up her body again, sliding all the way up her arms to her wrists. When Lucien released her with his actual hands, the phantom hands continued to hold her pinned in place, and Elain could do nothing but watch as he moved down her body, his lips grazing her collarbone, her breast, and down her ribs and stomach. She felt his hands skim her thighs, opening them a moment before she felt his lips following those hands, kissing the sensitive skin, and drawing another gasp from her. 

Lucien’s eyes met Elain’s again, and her breath caught in her throat as she looked down at him. “Mine…” he breathed, his lips quirking in a smile an instant before he bent to her, and Elain let her head fall back against the pillow with a cry, straining against the phantom hands holding hers pinned. Fire flooded her veins, and Elain didn’t try to hold in so much as a sound when Lucien’s tongue pressed into her. If his hands hadn’t been holding her thighs apart, she might have wriggled away, but he was doing a fine job of keeping her in place as he worked. 

“Lucien…” one of his hands caressed her thigh by way of response, but he did not stop what he had been doing, and Elain groaned his name again, “ _Lucien_ …” the intensity surrounding him deepened, and Elain chanced a look down at him again. His eyes were closed as he continued his ministrations, but then she felt another pair of phantom hands move over her. Elain shuddered as their touch slid from her hips up to caress her breasts, and her back arched as she tugged at her wrists, but still could not break free of that phantom grip. One of Lucien’s real hands went up and pressed her down, holding her in place with his hand on her stomach, and she let out another cry when he licked her in just the right place. “Ahh… yes…” Her eyes closed when those phantom hands continued to caress her, one moving to her cheek, brushing her hair back from her face, just as Lucien had done a hundred times before. She didn’t want phantom hands anymore, however, she wanted him. “Please…” she breathed, , “Lucien, please…”

She didn’t know if it was the tone in her voice, or the words themselves, but he lifted his head to meet her eyes, and she took in the lust-filled fogginess behind his russet eye. “Petal…?” he asked, his voice thick. 

“Enough…” she panted, trying to think, “Enough of this. I want you…” 

Elain watched Lucien take those words in, and she saw the moment he made the decision. His hand loosened around her thigh and he sat up higher, his other hand stroking her skin gently as he gazed down at her. Trying to lift her wrists again, Elain strained against the phantom hands. “Lucien…” She watched as he crawled over her, his movements all feline grace, and she went still, evert part of her wanting to feel his touch. Knowing that he was well aware of what she wanted, Elain watched as his eyes moved over her body, and one of his hands traced a gentle finger across her ribs.

“Perfect mate…” he murmured, and Elain’s pulse quickened at the sound of his voice. He smiled as if he had noticed, and Elain wanted to lift her hands to touch him, but still could not. She saw his gaze lift to where he still held her pinned beneath himself with those phantom hands, and he smiled. “Mine…”

“Oh, yes…” she breathed, feeling hot desire spiralling off of him. Lucien sank down over Elain and, in that instant, the phantom hands released her. She brought both arms down, sliding them around Lucien and pulling him tighter to herself. His lips were instantly on hers, and she opened her mouth to him, groaning when his tongue swept inside. Elain’s legs went around him, one of her feet hooking behind his knee as he deepened the kiss even further, and she listened to his heart thumping in her head. She could feel him clearly down the bond, feel that he wanted her, wanted to please her. “Do it…” she whispered, “Do it…”

Lucien’s hands tightened on her, and one slid up her throat, holding her in place. Elain’s eyes widened as she looked up at him, and he pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. She could feel each breath he took into himself, and she could feel the fire in his blood. Carefully, Elain traced a hand up his back, coming to rest against his shoulder, her eyes never leaving his. Lucien’s hand remained at her throat, and his gaze never wavered as his other hand went down between them. Elain’s breath caught in her throat when she felt him press against her, and she widened her legs just a little, her back already arching in anticipation of him. There was heat in his gaze as he looked at her, and Elain watched him tilt his head. “Mine…” he murmured, hand still at her throat, and Elain nodded an instant before he pushed himself firmly into her. “Uhh…” She felt his breath on her face, and then he had rolled his hips, and Elain clutched at his shoulders. 

Lucien’s free hand slid down Elain’s thigh, lifting her knee higher around himself as he took up a steady rhythm, and she closed her eyes, focusing on the golden thread she could see between them. The bond glowed so brightly, pulsing with light as Lucien moved inside of her, and she wrapped her arms more tightly around him. “Can you see it…?” she asked, her voice nothing more than a soft breath. 

“Yes.”

Elain reached for that golden thread, winding it around the two of them, binding them even more tightly together until she could feel Lucien’s heartbeat within herself. She felt his pleasure at that an instant before he sat up, lifting her with him and into his lap. One of his hands remained at her throat, while the other slid around to her lower back, and Elain could feel him pulling her to himself, to meet each of his thrusts up into her. She groaned, shifting her hips, and trying to think past the fire she could feel flooding her veins. Lucien’s hands were sure and steady, as was every movement he made, and Elain brought both of her hands to his face, holding it carefully so she could look at him. He met her eyes, and she listened to his panted breaths when she settled into her own rhythm moving to meet him. 

The heat and intensity moving within Lucien seemed to grow with every moment, and Elain’s only warning that something was about to happen was when his hand at her throat tightened slightly. Then, in an instant, she was on her back on the bedspread again and both of Lucien’s hands had moved to her hips. He took a firm hold of her, just about yanking her up to meet himself, as he let out loud grunt after grunt. She clung to him, shuddering when his lips returned to her ear, “My… Mate…”

“Yes…” she whimpered, clutching at that golden thread in her mind, and making sure it was still wound around the two of them. When Lucien’s teeth scraped her throat, she thought she might lose herself for a moment, and a small shriek escaped her. 

“Look… at … me…” Lucien’s voice held a tone of command that Elain obeyed instantly, opening her eyes to meet the intensity of his gaze. His steady rhythm increased in pace, and Elain felt herself slipping toward her own edge. She didn’t fight any of the instincts coursing through her, allowing each sound to escape as Lucien moved more and more quickly. She loved that he wasn’t holding anything back, that she had complete access to everything going on inside of him. 

“Yes…” she groaned, “Lucien… I want all of you…”

“You can have me.” He breathed, his lips against her ear, “Always.”

His focus on a new angle sent shivers through Elain, and she gave another cry, her eyes closing. Heat flooded her again, and she felt Lucien’s fire slide through her veins once more. As if sensing what she wanted, he focused his attentions on that one spot that made her gasp, and then she gave a scream as she came with an intensity that seemed to turn her bones to liquid.


	176. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Six

**Chapter 176**

Her scent caused Lucien’s blood to just about catch alight with every breath he took. He held Elain tightly in his arms, curled behind her, with his lips at the base of her neck. She was dozing, he could tell by the steady was she breathed deeply, her body relaxed. Lucien didn’t want to wake her, but with every breath he drew, that heady scent worked its way deeper and deeper into him, and he knew that he was growing hard again.

She had liked what he had done earlier, he’d been able to tell by the sounds that spilled from her perfect lips, as well as the excitement that had reached him down the bond. He had been a little uncertain about using those phantom hands at first, but her reactions had eased his mind, and he supposed he had been a little surprised. He’d been more than a little surprised that she had liked his hand around her throat, too. That hadn’t been his intention at first, and he had intended no more than to touch her for a moment, but the feeling he’d gotten from her down the bond had encouraged him to leave his hand there, and it had been entirely clear that she had enjoyed it.

Lucien drew another breath, and bit his lip at the need that flared within him. He wanted her again, and he shifted his hips away from her when his body began to react to that need more quickly. He didn’t want to wake her, she deserved her rest, and she needed it. Elain moved a little then, shifting back so that she was pressed to him once more, and Lucien gave a soft whimper when she pressed her arse back against his hard length. Elain must have heard him, because she turned her head looking back at him over her shoulder, and his heart squeezed at the sleepy smile she gave him. 

“Lucien…”

“Yes, Petal?” He felt her hand reach back, and she pressed her arse more firmly against him. “Ah…”

“It’s okay.” She murmured, “I ache to feel you in me…”

Lucien thought his heart might just explode out of his chest at those words and, without making the decision to move, he found his hands moving to Elain’s thighs. He lifted one, sliding toward her and drawing her back to himself so that he could position himself more easily. “Are you certain?” he breathed, his lips at the back of her neck again, and Elain just nodded. Needing no further encouragement, Lucien pushed carefully into her, maintaining his grip on her thigh, holding her leg up out of his way so that his movements were unhindered and smooth. Elain’s breathing quickened and before long, she was panting slightly. He could feel her moving her hands around, looking for something to take hold of as she tightened around him, and he found himself unable to keep still. 

Adjusting his hold on her, Lucien rolled, spreading Elain out before him, beneath him, and lifting her hips slightly to get a better angle. He heard her muffled groan, watched her hands slide across the sheets as she clenched handfuls of it, and then she turned her head so that her cheek was pressed to the pillow when she let out a loud gasp. Lucien picked up his rhythm again, hands on her hips, lifting and pulling her to himself as he moved. He watched Elain’s eyes close and then he slid one hand down over her arse before moving it up her back, his fingers tracing her spine until he reached the back of her neck. She pushed herself up on her hands then, rocking back to meet him, and Lucien slid his hand around to her throat, holding her firmly as she moved more forcefully. 

“Ah, fuck…” he breathed, his grip tightening on her. Excitement reached him down the bond, encouraging him on, and Lucien lengthened his strokes, one hand still at Elain’s hip. “…fuck.” When Elain stopped moving, Lucien released her, frightened for a moment that he may have hurt her. She turned then, one of her hands coming to his shoulder, as she pushed him over onto his own back and climbed atop him. “Petal…?” He could do nothing but watch as she traced her hand over him carefully before guiding him back inside of her, and his eyes caught on her face, watching her expression as she sank down over him, taking him deep. 

“Ah…” When she was fully seated over him, Elain gave a small sigh, her eyes closing as she sat still for several moments. Lucien let his hands slide up her thighs, and then he took both of her wrists in his hands, taking them around behind her to hold at her back. Elain’s dark eyes opened then to meet his, and she slowly began to move her hips. 

Lucien’s grip tightened on her wrists, holding them firmly, and Elain began to move more steadily over him. He watched her face, watched as she tilted her head back, casting her eyes to the ceiling, and he watched as her back arched. Still, he held her wrists firmly behind her back, listening to the sounds she was making low in her throat. Grinning then, Lucien created two more phantom hands, setting them at her breast. He felt Elain’s pleasure as her back arched again, even as she continued to rock on him, her hands held behind her and unable to touch him, even as others roamed her own body. 

Setting another pair to take over his job of holding her wrists, Lucien allowed his now free hands to join the others in moving over Elain’s skin. He let one rest at her hip, enjoying being able to follow her steady movements as she rode him, and he brought the other up, sliding across her ribs and up between her breasts to her throat. When she leaned into that hold, he knew what she wanted, and he tightened his grip slightly. Elain held his eyes then, moving with a perfect rhythm, as he felt her tighten around him, her panting breaths growing louder.

Lucien could feel it building within him, and he tried to breathe through it, wanting to see Elain come undone first. He wanted to hear her cry his name, wanted to watch as she lost control before collapsing down over him. Until that happened, he would hold off. 

As if sensing his thoughts, Elain seemed to redouble her own efforts, driving him closer and closer to that edge, and Lucien tried to breathe more deeply. “Come on, Petal,” he growled, lifting his hips to meet her as she moved on him, “Scream for me…” directing one of the phantom hands to clutch at her breast, Lucien sent another down between her legs, and then it was only a matter of moments before he felt her go. 

Elain’s whole body went taught, squeezing him within her as her back arched and she shook. “ _Lucien_!” the shriek she released was more high-pitched than anything he’d heard from her before, and Lucien relished in it before he came crashing down in his own release. When Elain collapsed over him, he wrapped her in his arms, holding her as she continued to shake and shiver, and he listened to every breath she panted into his ear as his blood sang in his veins.


	177. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Seven

**Chapter 177**

They had been outside all afternoon, and Elain had discovered that she very much enjoyed watching Lucien in the sun. If the High Lord of the Day Court was said to be the sun personified, then she could easily see how Lucien would fill that role one day. He had always looked magnificent in the sun, and she remembered falling in love with him in Rhys’ garden often watching the way the sunlight played off of his gorgeous skin and set his hair alight. Since he had been named Helion’s heir, and officially the future High Lord of the Day Court, Elain would have sworn that he glowed even more brightly in the daylight. She knew that Feyre sometimes glowed when she was happy, and that it was part of what she had gotten from Helion, so it made sense to her that Lucien would be somewhat similar. 

“Are you happy, love?” she asked, her eyes on her mate who was laying back against the blanket they had set out beneath the tree. He lowered the book on trade routes he had been reading, his lips quirking in a smile. 

“Of course.” His eyes moved over her, and Elain gave him a smile in return. “Why wouldn’t I be happy?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” She breathed, eyes sweeping over him again. “You’re kind of glowing…”

Lucien blinked, looking down at himself. “Am I?”

“It’s like when you burned your brother…” she said, still watching him, “But… different…” She smiled at him when his eyes lifted to her. “Feyre does it too, sometimes…”

“I’m assuming Helion must also.”

“I’d say so.” She lifted her feet and set them in his lap, getting comfortable. “I’m sorry for distracting you.”

“How could you distract me, Petal?” he smirked at her, and Elain felt her heartrate quicken, “You’re constantly the centre of my attention.”

“Well, that’s not true.” She met his eyes when he raised an eyebrow at her. “You were pretty into that book you are reading… I saw that focused look on your face.”

“Oh?” he lifted the book for her to see, “Would you prefer I give you more attention…?” he set the book aside and instead lifted one of her feet, massaging it gently. 

“That’s not what I meant…” she breathed, before giving a soft groan, “But I’m never going to turn down this…” she leaned back on her elbows, biting back another groan as his thumbs pushed into the soles of her feet delightfully. “Oh… my…”

“I was thinking.” He said, and Elain had to struggle to focus on his words, her mind centred on the wonderful things he was doing with his hands. “We should do the anchoring thing…”

Elain blinked, her mind suddenly sharpening. “Yes…” she sat up better, and Lucien released her feet as he met her gaze again. Once more, she felt her heartbeat quicken, but this time it was in apprehension. “You’re right.” She crossed her legs under herself, leaning her elbows on her knees. “How…?”

“Helion once told me that the Seer must do it.” He replied, and Elain’s anxiety grew. 

“What?” she asked, “No… I… don’t know how. Why can’t you do it?”

“It needs to be you.” He replied, “Or, I imagine there would have been endless abusers like Amarantha who would have attached themselves to unwilling Seers over the years…”

That made sense to her, and she nodded. “I suppose so.” She bit her lip as she met Lucien’s eyes again. “I… don’t’ know how to do it.”

Lucien nodded and sat up himself, patting his lap as he gestured for her to come to him. “Here, Petal.” He held a hand out to her then, and Elain crawled toward him. He pulled her into his lap, her back to his chest as his arms settled around her waist, and she leaned back into him. “I can help you, I think…”

Turning to look at him, she nodded, chewing on her lower lip. “Using the bond to do it…”

“Yes.” He replied. “It shouldn’t be hard…” She shuddered slightly when he pressed his lips to her shoulder. “It makes sense to use the bond, because it’s already there and it is what connects us.”

“So, what do I do?”

“Well, I think you need something to help you focus on the bond. An object, maybe…”

“This.” Without thinking, Elain lifted her hand to the garnet necklace that Lucien had given her in the Autumn Court. “I used it once to focus on you, so that I could see you in the Dawn Court.”

“Perfect.” He murmured.

“What do I do with it?”

“Hold it.” He told her, and Elain closed her hand around the garnet. “Use it to focus… and… try to see the bond.”

“Yes…” Elain clutched at the garnet, trying to envision the bond. It coiled between Lucien and herself, glowing almost as brightly as the sun. She reached down to take one of Lucien’s hands from her waist and she brought it up to the garnet, wanting him to hold it as well. “Can you see it?” she breathed, reaching, in her mind, for that golden thread.

“I can.”

“Take hold of it.” She breathed and, in her mind, he did. 

“Like you did before,” he told her, and she could feel his lips somewhere near her ear, “when you wound it around the both of us…”

“I think I understand…” Elain murmured, “The bond is strong…” she looped it around each of them again, “and to anchor it…” she encircled the garnet with the thread, and then did the same to the garnet wrist cuff around Lucien’s wrist. “We need only focus on the garnets…” she felt a tug on the bond as Lucien tested his end, “They will magnify the strength of the bond… and it will be easier for me to find you.”

“Remember,” he breathed, lips now against her ear as he held her in his lap, “I will come for you no matter where you go…”

Elain nodded, “I know.” The garnet in the necklace was hot in her hand now, “Is that it?” she asked, opening her eyes and turning to look at him, “Is that all I do?”

“I think so?” Lucien pressed his lips to hers. “Can you feel it?”

“I…” Elain thought about that. The newly accepted bond was already more powerful than what she had been used to, and she could feel that. But, somewhere under that… she thought she might feel something new. A weighty, heavy steadiness that felt solid and comforting. Lucien. “I think I can…” She looked at him, “Can you?” He nodded, and she watched as several emotions flickered across his face, reaching her down the bond. “What does it feel like?”

“You.” He murmured, his hand sliding from the garnet at her throat, down her chest. Elain leaned back into him, listening to his heartbeat. “What does it feel like for you?”

“Strong.” She told him, “Like even if the most savage wind tried to pick me up and carry me away, it would hold me here.”

“An anchor.”

“Yes.” Elain lay her head back against his shoulder. “Do you think it will work?” she asked him. “Do you think it will keep me from losing my mind?”

“Absolutely, Petal.” His lips brushed her cheek. “I promised, didn’t I?”

Nodding, Elain pushed herself up enough to turn and slide into Lucien’s lap again, her knees either side of him. “You did promise.” She whispered, winding her arms around his neck, “And, I know you’ll do your best to keep that promise.”

One of Lucien’s hands came up to the garnet necklace again and she felt his fingers trace it slowly. “I will.” He told her, his eyes, both russet and golden, on hers. “I have waited so very long for you.” He said softly, “Nothing will take you from me.”

Elain tightened her arms around his neck, pressing her forehead to his. “Lucien… I want to be your mate for all of eternity.”

Joy reached Elain down the bond then, and she smiled, still holding tightly to him. “Me too, Petal.” He replied, one of his arms snaking tightly around her waist. “Me too.”


	178. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Eight

**Chapter 178**

Lucien’s fingers pushed into Elain’s hair as the afternoon sun blazed in through the window and across the bed. She just watched his face as he lay beside her, his eyes focused on her as his fingers caressed her. “How do you feel?” he asked her, and Elain paused to consider. 

“… content?” she murmured and he smiled. 

“So the need is gone?” he asked and Elain pushed herself up on her elbow to better look at him. She thought about it for a second, and figured that he was right. 

“I…” she blinked, looking at him, “What about you?”

He nodded, his fingers sliding down the back of her neck as his eyes remained on her face. “I think it’s abated…”

A strange sense of loss flowed through Elain. “Oh…” she murmured and, a moment later, Lucien pulled her carefully down to him, kissing her gently. 

“It’s okay, Petal.” He told her, releasing her just a little, “Don’t be sad.”

“Mmm…” She ran her eyes over his face as he looked at her. “But that means its over.” She watched him think for a moment, that thoughtful expression that she loved crossing his face before he replied. 

“It means it’s just beginning.” He rose a little until he was sitting beside her, his hand still at the back of her neck. “Our life together…” he smiled widely, “It starts now. Mate.” Elain smiled back at him, nodding her agreement. “Don’t think that just because the frenzy has eased that I don’t want you.” A mischievous smirk worked its way onto Lucien’s face and he winked at her, “All the time.” He slid his other arm around Elain’s waist and she let him draw her closer. 

“I suppose we will have to let them know.” She said softly, “That the frenzy has passed…”

“Not yet.” Lucien’s smirk grew and he pulled Elain down and settled himself over her. “We can afford just a little more time just for us…”

“Ah…” Wrapping her arms around Lucien’s neck, Elain relaxed beneath him as she held his eyes. “I think I rather like the sound of that.”

“I am pleased, Lady.” He made a show of getting comfortable, resting his weight over her, one of his hands coming up to her cheek, his fingers sliding back into her hair again, “Because I am not ready to let you go just yet. I’m not ready to share.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to share.” She replied, smiling up at him, and then humming her approval when Lucien bent to kiss her. His kiss was gentle and tender, and Elain found herself melting beneath him, tingles rising on her skin wherever he touched her. Even without the mating frenzy driving them, every moment of this was fantastic. Elain reminded herself that it had been before as well, and that there was no reason that it should change. 

“What do you think?” he murmured, his lips moving to brush Elain’s ear, “Once more before we let Helion know that we’re now safe to approach…?” Elain could hear the smirk in Lucien’s voice and she nodded as she resisted a chuckle. 

Almost immediately, Lucien’s hands slid down to her thighs, and Elain let her eyes flutter closed as he caressed her gently before slowly lifting the light dress she wore. She was barely aware of what he was doing but, somehow, he’d gotten it off of her and pushed it away across the bed before she felt his lips on her skin. Letting out a soft sigh, Elain slid one of her own hands into Lucien’s hair as he made his way down her body, his lips tracing her collarbones as he moved down her chest, over her breasts and down past her ribs. She felt him lick gently at her stomach before he began making his way higher once more. “Shirt…” Elain barely got the word out, her mind was fogging so quickly, but she tugged at the shirt he wore and an instant later, Lucien had pulled it off and tossed it away. 

“So articulate.” He chuckled, his lips now caressing her throat. 

“You’re the one with the clever mouth.” She replied, pleased that she could feel him ridding himself of his pants next. 

“And I do know how much you like my clever mouth.” His words were hot against her ear, and Elain felt herself blush even as a hot pulse of desire went straight between her legs. She did like his clever mouth, for a variety of reasons. “Shall I remind you of what I can do with it?” An image of the first time Lucien had come to her room in the Night Court with the intent to show her what he could do with his mouth flashed before Elain’s eyes. She saw herself laying back on her bed with her legs spread wide and Lucien kneeling between them. She remembered how she had reacted when she had first felt his hot mouth on her, his tongue lapping at her, and she gave a gasp. Lucien’s soft laugh told her that he had pushed those images to her down the bond, and she clutched at him. 

“How about you remind me what else you can do…” 

“As you wish, Lady.” He lifted his head to meet her eyes before his hands had taken hers and he’d brought them up over her head. She blinked as he directed her to take hold of the headboard, his smile growing as he looked at her, and then his hands were moving down her body again. When they reached her thighs, Elain spread her legs for him, expecting those hands to move between her thighs, but they didn’t. They slid down to catch behind her knees, and Lucien lifted them higher. 

Elain gripped the headboard as Lucien lifted her legs, shifting himself down until he could bring her ankles up and over his shoulders, and then he moved higher. She was growing more and more wet by the moment, and Elain bit her lip as a steady throbbing need built between her legs. “Lucien…”

“I know…” he all but purred, and she watched him reach a hand up over her to grip the headboard himself. Elain’s breath caught in her throat when she felt him push gently against her, and then he looked down at her, meeting her eyes before pushing again, his hips pressing forward and she felt him slide slowly into her inch by inch. She gasped then, her hands tightening on the headboard as Lucien’s free hand slid down her leg from ankle to thigh. “Does that hurt?” he asked, and she could hear the restraint in his voice as he held himself still. Shaking her head, Elain tried to make herself draw breath. Her heart was pounding, and she could hear Lucien’s as well. She knew that if she could force herself to breathe steadily, that they would align and she gripped more tightly to the headboard as she draw air into herself. 

Lucien must have been waiting for her to breathe, because he moved then, hips slow and steady as he withdrew before pressing forward once more. Elain felt his free hand move up her side, and then it was at her cheek, holding her still so that he could watch her face as he thrust again. She made a small sound at that, knowing that it would please him, and she felt his reaction down the bond. He began to move more quickly then, keeping her ankles high over his shoulders as he just about bent her in half, seeking a higher new angle, and Elain’s eyes closed as she began to lose herself in the sensations flooding her body. Her grip on the headboard tightened further, and she heard the thing creak as Lucien evidently did the same. That creak grew rhythmic as he was clearly using the headboard to give himself more leverage and to lend power to his thrusts, pulling himself up harder, and Elain groaned in response.

She had told him to remind her of what he could do, and she rather thought he was doing an excellent job of that. Her entire body felt as if she had swallowed liquid fire, and she was so very thankful that she had the rest of eternity during which to look forward to this. Her blood was singing, her heart was singing, and Elain began to let out cry after cry with every movement Lucien made. She could hear his own grunting with his efforts, and his breath was panted and heavy against her ear and throat. The creaking of the headboard seemed to be in tune with each sound he made, and Elain tried shifting her hips to meet him in his efforts. Lucien let out a string of expletives in response, and then Elain couldn’t hear him any more as he pushed her quickly to her peak and she let out a scream that she was sure half the palace must have heard. At least nobody would be guessing that the frenzy would be over and come looking for them. Not yet, anyway.


	179. Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Nine

**Chapter 179**

Focusing intently upon the petals of the small orange flower, Elain tried to take in the way the petals curled around toward the ends. She was kneeling in the garden attached to their little suite, and she held the book Lucien had given her in her lap. Lucien had organised for a message to be sent to Helion, informing the High Lord that the mating frenzy was over, and then he had gone to bathe and clean up as they would no doubt be asked to join the rest of the Court for dinner that evening. Elain had decided that before they left the suite and the frenzy was officially over, she wanted to capture just a little piece of it to keep with her. She had decided that a flower from the garden would be a nice way to do so, and had selected the pretty little orange flowers growing in one of the garden beds as effective ground cover. They were pretty, they smelled nice and, she rather thought, they looked like little suns.

Sketching the twisted shape of the petals, Elain tilted her head, trying to decide if she would just leave it at a single flower, or if she would include the whole stem with several flowers on it. She figured that capturing the whole stem would give a better indication of the shape of the plant, and so she continued with her efforts. She would need to colour it to best keep true to the flower, and she made note of the way that the petals seemed to darken toward the ends. She had first noticed the little orange blooms when she and Lucien had been out here together in the sun several days ago and she had been moving atop him wondering if she could make him scream. Smiling at the memory, Elain continued to sketch the flower as best she could. She did not expect to hear Helion’s voice from directly behind her. 

“Elain, are you well?”

Spinning around on her knees, Elain looked up at the High Lord. Her eyes flicked to the door behind him, looking for Lucien, and wondering how her mate might react to another male being in here and being near her so soon after the frenzy. 

“I am well. Thank you.”

Helion moved closer, and Elain noticed his amber eyes looking her over slowly. “… do you require a healer?” he asked, and she could hear genuine concern in his voice. Was it common for females to need to see healers after the frenzy? She supposed it might have been, depending on how rough things got. 

“No, I… don’t…” she murmured, her eyes on his face once more. 

“… does Lucien?” he asked, and she could hear slight amusement there now, although she could tell that the question was genuine. 

“No.” she replied, “We’re both fine.”

“I am pleased to hear it.” Helion’s voice was warm, and Elain saw him smile as he looked at her. “I am to take it that everything went well, then?” She nodded and watched as he cast his eyes around the garden. “Everything was to your liking? You didn’t need anything further that we had not thought to include?”

“The suite was perfect.” She looked at the orange flower again, “We were both very comfortable here.”

“It is to remain yours.” He said, “The rooms of my heir and his mate…” his amber eyes found hers again, “That is… if you are planning on staying.” When he raised an eyebrow, Elain realised that he had wanted her to confirm that they would be staying, but she couldn’t do that. She had assumed that they would be, as had Helion, she figured, but until she and Lucien had that conversation and explicitly stated that this was what they wanted, then she was unable to say for certain that they would be staying and they would be living here. 

“Thank you.” She said to Helion. “I need to speak to Lucien about it… make sure we are on the same page.”

“Of course.” The High Lord said, clasping his hands in front of him, “I do understand.” He glanced over his own shoulder then before looking back to Elain. “Lucien is in the bathroom?”

“Yes. He was preparing for dinner… ah… do… how… do you think he will react to… you… in here…?” She didn’t know how to ask the High Lord if he realised that Lucien may be less than impressed to come out and find another male in his space. “So… soon after the frenzy…”

“I think Lucien possesses enough self-control to deal with any lingering… aggression.”

Elain hoped that he was right, but a part of her let out an exasperated sigh. She was tired of Lucien having to control himself and moderate his reactions. He had been forced to do that his entire life, and she wanted him free from it, if only for a while, and if only in these rooms. Helion was still looking at her, so she gestured to the little orange flowers. “Do you know the name of these, by any chance?” she asked, “I would like to include them in my book.”

Helion strode closer until he could bend down beside her. “I believe these are called Sundaze Blaze.”

“They are lovely.” She said, showing him the sketch she had completed so far. “I think they might be the last for the Day Court that I will do.”

He smiled at her and then they both looked around to see Lucien stride into the garden. Elain heard his heartrate suddenly increase and she noticed the way that he suddenly changed, holding himself straighter and more still. Getting to her feet she strode toward her mate and away from the High Lord. She didn’t stop until she reached Lucien and she slipped one of her hands into his. “You smell nice…” she told him, hoping to distract him from the uneasiness and a hint of anger that she could feel within him. She could also feel him fighting it, and knew that the rational part of his brain was trying to tell him to calm down. 

He turned his head toward her at her words. “Do I?”

“Yes.” She hooked her elbow through his as she leaned against him. “Helion was just telling me about that little flower I was drawing.”

“Yes…” he murmured, his voice suggesting that his mind was still partly elsewhere, “You said you wanted a flower from our garden…”

“It’s called Sundaze Blaze.” She told him. 

“That seems appropriate.”

“I was thinking of cutting a bunch and putting it by the bed…” she knew that she was just talking for the sake of it now, trying to distract Lucien enough that his heart would slow down and he would be able to get control of himself again. When he tightened his hand on hers, Elain knew that it was working. 

“That would be nice.” He said, and then turned his eyes toward his father. “To what do we owe the honour of your visit?”

“I came to offer Elain and yourself the services of a healer, should one be required.” Helion said, and Elain raised an eyebrow at that blunt honesty. Lucien didn’t seem to bat an eyelid, however. 

“I don’t believe either of us does require a healer.” He bowed his head slightly, “I am thankful for the offer, however.”

Helion smiled at him, and Elain watched the two of them just look at one another for several moments. “Also,” Helion went on, “I would like to extend the invitation of dinner…”

“Yes.” Lucien nodded, “We will be there.”

“Nesta and Cassian are still here…” These words Helion directed at Elain, who could not help but smile. She had known that Nesta would remain, but to hear it confirmed made her heart sing. 

“We will definitely be there.” She agreed.


	180. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty

**Chapter 180**

The walk to dinner had been easy. Elain and Lucien had finished getting ready after Helion had left them and then, as the sun had set, they had left their suite for the first time in days and walked the corridors to the dining hall. They had seen nobody on their way, and they had discussed the reception they thought they might receive from the Court. Lucien was under the impression that everyone would act as if nothing had happened, and that it wasn’t a big deal and, while Elain hoped that he was correct, she was worried that it would be treated as a big deal and that a fuss would be made. It wasn’t something that she particularly wanted to face. She did not enjoy the idea of faeries looking at her and imagining what she and Lucien had been doing for the past several days. It was bad enough that they all knew anyway.

Feeling herself blush, Elain remembered the way that she had last walked into that hall with a tray of cakes for Lucien. She could hardly believe that she had done that in front of the entire Court, and all of the High Lords. Never would Elain had believed she would have done such a thing, but she had wanted Lucien so very badly, and she had needed that bond between them. She did not regret doing it at all. But, she would prefer if they could all just pretend that everything was normal.

“Are you ready, Petal?” 

“Oh…” Elain looked up to realise that they had arrived at the doors to the dining room, and she bit her lower lip as Lucien’s hand rested on the door handle. “Okay.” 

“Here we go.” He smiled at her as he pushed the door open and led her through. Elain didn’t know if she imagined it or not, but the conversation within the room seemed to falter as she and Lucien walked in. Lucien’s hand was suddenly on her lower back, as he guided her toward the table, and she moved easily, catching sight of Nesta already seated nearby. Lucien’s hand moved in small circles across her back and she glanced over her shoulder at him. His eyes were on her, and she could tell that he was listening to her heart beating rapidly. Elain drew a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She gave a smile to her mate, hoping to ease his concern, and then she turned that smile on her sister when she reached the table.

Nesta actually stood up when Elain reached for the chair beside her sister. “Elain…” Nesta’s slim arms went around Elain suddenly, and her sister drew her into a tight hug. “I wasn’t sure how long it would take…”

“I had you down for two days.” Cassian’s voice put in, and Elain looked over Nesta’s shoulder to see the Illyrian sitting on the other side of the table, smirking at them.

“Can’t say I’m sorry to disappoint you.” Lucien replied, and Elain could feel his amusement. She tended to agree with her mate. She was also glad that the frenzy had lasted longer than two days.

“I… sorry…” Elain looked up at her sister’s face, “Did you need to return to the Night Court?”

“No.” Nesta squeezed her a bit, “No, I just didn’t… know… what was normal…” Nesta let her go then, and the two of them sank into their chairs. “Ashk told me that every mated pair is different, and that the frenzy has been known to last for weeks…”

“That is a long time.” Elain murmured, eyeing her sister. “That sounds exhausting.”

“I… would imagine so.” Nesta’s blue-grey eyes shifted to the table, and Elain watched her sister fiddle with her cutlery. 

“Have you been speaking to Ashk much?” 

“Oh…” Nesta nodded, “Well, after Feyre and Viviane left… Ashk stayed and said that she wished to wait to say goodbye to you and Lucien after the frenzy… so…” Nesta’s slim shoulders lifted in a shrug, “We’ve been taking walks around the Palace of a morning.”

“I spent some time doing the same thing with her when I first arrived here.”

“She is easy to be with.” Nesta said softly, “She understands the need for silence that one gets…”

“I imagine that she would.” Elain agreed, thinking that Ashk must have spent much of her life with Beron escaping into silence. Especially with seven sons.

“She told me that she had invited you and Lucien to visit the Autumn Court for Mabon. Are you going?”

“Perhaps.” Elain said, “We’ve not discussed it.” Looking at her sister then, Elain smiled, “Did she invite you?”

“Yes.”

“Are you going?”

“I think I might.” Nesta said. “It does sound like a beautiful place.”

“Very much.”

Nesta turned toward her again, and then leaned closer. “So,” those blue-grey eyes narrowed a little and Elain watched her sister look her over. “are you alright?” the words were whispered and so low that Elain had to practically read Nesta’s lips to catch what she had asked.

“Yes.” Nodding, Elain tried to smile as reassuringly as she could. “I am just fine.” Nesta continued to look her over. 

“Apparently injuries are not uncommon.”

“Lucien wouldn’t hurt me.” She said simply, “Not even during the frenzy.” Watching Nesta try to accept those words, Elain went on. “Helion even showed up to offer us both the services of one of his healers earlier. We did not need it.”

“Cassian said…” Nesta broke off then, her eyes catching on Elain’s face. 

“Cassian does not know Lucien all that well.” Elain could hear the slight snarl beneath her own whispered words, and she fought to keep her voice low enough to not be overheard by anyone else. “I hope he wasn’t making assumptions.”

“Autumn Court males…”

“I don’t care where someone is from, as long as their heart is good.” Elain replied, “I would have thought you would feel the same way.”

“I… do…” Nesta’s own reply was almost sighed. “It had just been days… without word. I was worrying.”

“Trust me.” Elain muttered, “I was more than fine.” Nesta blushed at that, and Elain softened a little. She knew that she would have begun to worry about Nesta if it had been her sister disappearing for days on end into the mating frenzy. Her gaze slid to Cassian across the table, and it was all too easy to imagine him being the one to sling Nesta over his expansive shoulder and carry her away. Elain had no doubt that her own imagination would run wild in the days of silence that would likely follow such a thing. She was certain that she would have created so many worrying scenarios in her head where Nesta would sustain any amount of injuries during rigorous and passionate sessions of lovemaking with the big Illyrian. It was unfair of her to be annoyed at Nesta for worrying about her. “I am glad that you stayed, Nes.” She told her. “That means a lot to me.”

“Of course.” Nesta said, clearly relieved that Elain was no longer irritated. “I told you that I would.”

“So…” Elain murmured, her eyes sliding from Nesta to Cassian, and then back again. “you spent time with Ashk. Did you also spend time with Cassian who, I have noticed, has stayed to keep you company instead of returning to the Night Court with his High Lord and High Lady…”

“I…” Nesta blushed even darker, “I… he does follow me around a lot.”

“Of course he does.” Elain couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face. “And you like it.”


	181. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-One

**Chapter 181**

Elain cackled to herself while dinner was brought into the room and several dishes were set on the tables in front of them. She continued to watch Nesta out of the corner of her eye as her sister huffed and fiddled with the goblet in front of her. She could see that Nesta was trying very hard to seem put out and disbelieving, but she could also so very easily see that it was an act. The slight colour that had filled Nesta’s cheeks gave her away nearly as much as the frequency with which Nesta’s eyes kept flicking up to look at Cassian across the table. Elain could see that her sister could hardly keep her eyes off of the Illyrian, and she would have bet that the two of them had barely been out of one another’s sight the whole time that she and Lucien had been caught up in the mating frenzy. 

As a steaming pile of juicy looking meats was placed before Elain, she tried to work out what to do about her sister. She wasn’t sure if she should keep pushing Nesta to confront her feelings about Cassian, or if she should leave her be. If Nesta was to keep moving forward, then Elain thought that she would rather need encouragement in order to not just turn and run away, but at the same time she did not want to push her too far and too fast. Perhaps it was none of her business, and she should just allow things to happen in their own time. 

Reaching forward, Elain selected several pieces of meat and set them on her own plate as she glanced at Nesta once more. Her sister was now moving things around her plate, and Elain thought that she might leave it for tonight, but then tomorrow she wanted to have a proper talk to her sister. It hadn’t escaped Elain’s notice that Cassian kept watching Nesta about as much as she was watching him. It was clear in the Illyrian’s eyes that he was confused about Nesta’s behaviour. If Nesta had been as hot and cold as Elain suspected she had been, then it was of no real surprise to Elain that Cassian would feel confused. 

When Lucien’s hand slid onto her knee, Elain turned her head his way. His eyes, both russet and golden, were on her and she raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you alright, Petal?” he asked, “I’m sensing concern from you…”

“I am concerned.” She agreed softly, her eyes flicking Nesta’s way for a moment and then back to Lucien who nodded his head in understanding. She tilted her face up to him when he leaned in to her, his lips brushing against her ear. 

“She want’s him.” He breathed, and Elain nodded. 

“I know,” she replied.

“Do you think that she knows?”

“I think she’s probably coming to that conclusion.” Elain smiled at Lucien when he sat straight again. “She would want to be sure. Nesta never does anything that she is not sure about.” 

“Rather like you, then?” he asked, his eyes moving over her face. Elain raised an eyebrow at him, but then figured he was probably right as she had made him wait for so very long while she made certain that she was sure about him, and wanting to be his mate. As if sensing her thoughts, Lucien lifted a hand to Elain’s cheek and she met his eyes again as his fingers traced her cheekbone. “It was worth the wait.” He told her, leaning in again. This time Elain met him as he brought his lips down to meet hers in a soft kiss. “It was worth every second.”

Elain wanted to wrap her arms around Lucien, she wanted to slide her hands around his shoulders and shift closer and closer until she could press her chest against him, and feel every breath he took. Instead, she made herself let him go as they both returned to their dinners. 

Ashk was across the table, and Elain tried not to watch as Lucien’s mother kept casting furtive glances Helion’s way. She hadn’t expected the other female to actually leave the Day Court. She had thought that she would have chosen to stay because she knew that Helion would have allowed it, and Lucien had said that he believed Eris would have let Ashk do whatever it was that she had wanted. Nevertheless, if Ashk was inviting Nesta to the Mabon celebration in the Autumn Court, then she clearly wasn’t staying in the Day Court. Wondering how disappointed by that Lucien was, Elain slanted a glance at her mate. His attention was focused entirely upon his plate, and she was unable to glean anything from him down the bond. When they had the space to speak alone gain, Elain decided she would ask him. Perhaps tomorrow, he would be able to speak properly with his mother and see if anything could be done. 

After dinner, Elain reclined on a couch across from Nesta. Her sister was still avoiding her eyes and, as Ashk sank down beside them, Elain’s eyes scanned the room for Lucien.

“Elain,” Ashk smiled, “are you well?”

“Yes. Thank you.” Elain smiled at the redheaded female for a moment before continuing to sweep the room with her eyes. She spotted Lucien nearby and quickly heading their way, and she sat up a little more straight in her chair. He had nearly reached them when a group of courtiers flocked around him, momentarily cutting him off from view, and Elain tilted her head.   
When Lucien did not reappear after a few moments, Elain reached for the bond. She could hear his heartbeat, quick and flustered and she couldn’t help a slight snarl. Both Nesta and Ashk went very still, and Elain could feel their eyes on her, but she didn’t much care.

“Is everything okay, Elain?” This was Nesta, but Elain gave a shrug. She wasn’t about to claim everything was fine when everything in her was screaming at her to go to Lucien. 

Giving in to the need, Elain got to her feet, brushing her hair back from her face, and adjusting the dress she wore, she tried to contain another snarl, but was unable to do so. Female faeries were flitting all over the place, and she could hear Lucien’s voice nearby. Striding toward him, she was forced to sidestep several of the females, and Elain had to exercise some serious self-control to keep herself from shoving them out of her way. 

Lucien’s heart was quick, but Elain would have wagered hers was even quicker by the time she next caught sight of her mate. It wasn’t that anyone was touching him or doing anything that appeared to be inappropriate. They were interested though, Elain could just about smell that and it made her blood boil. 

Unable to help herself, Elain gave a loud growl and did elbow her way past several of the faeries closest to Lucien. She knew that the instant he had met her gaze that he had understood what was going on, and he opened his arms to her. Without hesitation, Elain flung herself at him.


	182. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Two

**Chapter 182**

Lucien caught Elain when she jumped at him, and he wrapped his arms around her as she pressed her face into his neck. He could hear her heart beating almost erratically, and he could feel her driving need to ensure that everyone around them could see that he belonged to her. “Lucien…” she breathed, and he could feel her hot breath against his skin.

“I know.” He replied gently, his hands moving soothingly up and down her back. “It’s the bond. It’s okay, just don’t fight it. Embrace it.” Lucien could hear Elain’s heart slow just a little, and she relaxed against him, her arms loosening around him. He set her carefully back on the floor, his arms still around her, his hand still moving over her and, after a moment, she looked up to meet his eyes. “Still yours.” He told her, and she smiled softly. 

“Sorry…” she breathed, “I…”

Lucien cut her off by bending and pressing his lips to hers. She had absolutely no reason to apologise. He rather enjoyed knowing that she would act to ensure that everyone knew that she was his mate, and that she wouldn’t just sit to the side while she thought others might try something on him. If anyone had any doubts about them, he wanted them to know just much they were enamoured with one another. 

When he felt Elain’s heartbeat flutter, Lucien slipped one of his hands around her waist, half lifting her to himself, and making sure that everyone could see that she was pressed firmly to him. Then, he slowly moved to deepen the kiss, his own heart quickening when Elain allowed him to do exactly as he desired. He could hear the soft murmurs around them, and he couldn’t have given less of a fuck. As his tongue swept her mouth, Lucien felt Elain’s hands clutch at his shoulders, taking handfuls of his shirt and gripping tightly. He could feel her responding to him, pressing closer, and he could feel her resisting the urge to lift one of her legs and hook it around him. Remembering that Elain had never been one for public displays of affection like this, he went to pull back just a little, not wanting to push her into something that she didn’t want. As he went to move back though, Elain pulled him closer again and he could feel her trying to draw him in. He went without complaint.

*

Much of the Court was watching them, Elain could feel dozens of pairs of eyes upon them, and she didn’t care. She would have, even a week ago. She would have wanted to end this for now, and save it for when she and Lucien were alone. Now, however, she wanted everyone in this room to see them. She was Lucien’s mate. He was hers. They had to respect that. If that meant that she was going to have to kiss him, run her hands over him, somewhere that they could all see, then so be it. Elain would much prefer that than to sit on the couch nearby and allow all of those females to surround him, able to scent their interest in him from across the room while she did nothing but smile and act as if it didn’t make her want to smack each and every one of them.

“Mate.” Lucien whispered, his lips now at her ear. She shuddered when he shifted to softly kiss the side of her throat. “Do you feel better?”

“Yes.” She truly did. The urge within her to get to him, to claim him in front of the others, had abated and she held tightly to him now just enjoying the feeling of holding him close. 

“Let me know when you wish to retire for the evening.” His lips continued to move down her throat and, when Elain allowed her eyes to scan the room, she could see several pairs of eyes still directed their way. Noting the way that several females continued to track Lucien, Elain unleashed a soft snarl. 

“Now?” she asked, wanting to get him out of this room. She wanted her mate somewhere out of prying eyes. She hesitated then, however. Had he been planning to speak with his mother this evening? She had decided that she would wait for tomorrow to speak with Nesta, but perhaps Lucien had wanted to act sooner than she did. He was nodding, though. Then he released his hold on her waist and took her hand in one of his large hands.

“Sounds good to me, Petal.”

Elain let Lucien pull her swiftly from the room, and she cast only a single glance over her shoulder at the rest of the room. Nesta was watching her, an odd look on her face, but her sister said or did nothing, and then Elain was out in the hallway with Lucien and she forgot all about what Nesta had been thinking. “Lucien…”

“Yes?” he asked, and she met his eyes as he walked. 

“You don’t mind?” she asked, “Leaving so early?”

“I think I would rather be alone with you than in a room full of strangers.” He smiled at her, “You were okay leaving Nesta?”

“Yes. I… I want…”

“I see.” Lucien nodded, and Elain wondered how he could possibly see when she hadn’t been able to articulate it. “You want to be mine.”

“I am yours.” She breathed, “You are mine…”

“You want the bond.”

“Yes…” she didn’t know how he knew what she wanted, especially when she hadn’t been able to say it, not knowing what was driving her to begin with. She was confused about what was swirling inside of her, but she was thankful that Lucien was apparently on board with whatever it was.

When he opened the door to their suite, Elain let him lead her inside and she turned to look at him when he closed and locked the door. Something inside of Elain had her pulling the laces of her dress loose, and then Lucien strode toward her, his hands sliding up under the dress, up her thighs. He lifted her to himself and then carried her across the room. 

Elain was wet before Lucien put her back on her feet before the bed. The aching need between her thighs made it clear to her what she wanted, even as Lucien brought both of his hands up to her face, brushing her hair back, an instant before he kissed her ever so lightly. His hands were gentle on her, sliding down to brush the dress from her shoulders, and then allowing it to fall down her body to pool at her feet. Lucien looked at her then, and something made her clear her throat as she looked up at him and spoke words that surprised even herself as they came forth. “I don’t want gentle.”

She saw him blink, and she watched his expression as he took in those words. Elain wondered for a moment what Lucien might say in response, if he would agree or ask her if she was certain. He didn’t say a thing, however. When Lucien moved, his hands shot out to take her firmly by her bare shoulders and he spun her around so that her back was to his chest. Elain’s eyes closed as his hands moved over her then. His touch was not gentle as his fingers traced her ribs, moving lower and then between her thighs as he explored her. Heat flared within Elain, and she knew that she was growing more wet by the second. 

When Lucien’s hands moved back up her body, Elain’s eyes flew open as he clutched roughly at one of her breasts, and she gave a gasp. Lucien’s other hand went suddenly to her shoulder, and then he had forced her face down onto the mattress, kicking her feet apart with his own. Elain gasped again, and then she felt a brush from Lucien down the bond, and knew that he was trying to determine if she was okay with this, and if this was what she had wanted. It was. Want flowed through her, filling every part of her with heat and excitement, and she sent all of that down the bond to her mate.


	183. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Three

**Chapter 183**

Pressing a hand firmly against Elain’s back, Lucien pulled at the laces of his pants with the other. When he got them loose enough, he pulled them off before returning his hand to her back, sliding slowly up her spine to the back of her neck. Pushing her feet even further apart, Lucien made a show of adjusting her into a position that would best suit his purpose, his left hand sliding across her hip, fingers caressing her soft skin.

He could feel the bond tugging at Elain, feel her struggling with it, and he knew what she wanted. “Now that we’re here, mate.” He breathed, fingers tracing her spine, “What do you want of me?”

Elain’s cheek was pressed against the bedspread, and Lucien watched her hands glide along the smooth material, up above her head. “I…” she panted, and her hands clenched on that bedspread, holding tightly, “I…”

“Do you want me inside of you?” he tried to keep his voice mild, but his mouth had gone dry at the sight of her bent before him, and Lucien could feel himself growing harder by the second. She nodded, her eyes closing. 

“Y-yes…”

“How much?” he asked, his own eyes closing at the touch of his own hand moving over his hard length. 

“a-ah…” Elain didn’t seem to be able to form words, but she pulled at him down the bond, and Lucien opened his eyes as he stepped closer to her. Sliding his hand down Elain’s back, he bent his knees just a little as he spread her open and positioned himself correctly. 

“Is this what you want?” he asked, and she nodded, lifting her head as she braced herself with her arms before glancing over her shoulder at him. Lucien could feel her need, burning hot down the bond and he felt his heart quicken in response to her desire. She wanted him, and she didn’t want him to be gentle. Elain wanted the bond to be reinforced, she wanted to feel that she was his as much as he was hers. He could do that. “Command me, my love…” he breathed. 

“Fuck me.” Elain whimpered, clenching handfuls of the bedspread in her hands, “Fuck me, Lucien.”

That was all the instruction Lucien needed. He pressed forward, sliding himself straight into Elain’s deliciously sweet heat. She made a low sound, deep in her throat, and Lucien’s heart raced. One of his hands went to the back of her neck, holding her pinned as he withdrew and then thrust again. She was so delightfully wet, and every move me made was easy and smooth and he couldn’t help a groan of his own.

“Ahh…” Elain dragged half of the bedspread toward herself, pushing herself up as Lucien thrust again, “Ah... yes…”

Lucien smiled at her reaction, pleased that she liked what he was doing. Then he remembered that she hadn’t wanted him to be gentle, and he tightened his hand at the back of her neck again, pushing her back down against the bedspread. Holding her pinned there, unable to push herself up again, Lucien quickened his movements, thrusting into her over and over while Elain could do nothing but groan and urge him on.

After several minutes, Lucien pulled out of Elain and slid both of his hands to her waist before he quickly flipped her over onto her back. She gave a startled gasp, looking up at him and he gave her a wicked grin. “Thought you might like to watch your mate have you.” He purred, and a shiver of excitement reached him down the bond. He slid his hands down her thighs, lifting them and spreading them wide again before he pushed back into her. She gave a loud cry, lifting her hands as if to reach for him, and Lucien bit his lip. 

Sending two of his phantom hands to pin Elain’s wrists by her head, while his own two hands went to her hips, Lucien tightened his grip on her, pulling her to meet his thrusts as he was unable to resist a grunt with every move he made. Elain was groaning, her breath seemingly coming more and more quickly as he increased his pace. If it were possible, Lucien thought he might have been growing even harder as he watched Elain spread out before him, and he could feel her excitement at being able to do nothing but lay there and watch him fuck her. Knowing that she would enjoy it even more, Lucien set another phantom hand to her throat. Elain’s eyes widened slightly, and she made another sound deep within her as he adjusted his angle, pulling Elain even closer to the edge of the bed. She was burning hot down the bond, and he watched as her skin flushed a pretty shade of red. The sounds coming out of her were growing more and more high pitched, and Lucien could feel how much she was enjoying this whole situation. Keeping her pinned at both her wrists and throat, Lucien maintained his rhythm, his hands firm at her hips, and his eyes on her face. Elain’s usually sweet doe brown eyes were clouded with what he recognised as clear lust, and he marvelled at how that simple detail could change her whole appearance. It made him want her even more. But not like this. 

Lucien did not enjoy holding Elain down. After a moment’s consideration, he released the phantom hands and loosened his tight grip on her hips. Bringing one knee up onto the bed, then Lucien moved carefully over Elain. She looked up at him with a smile, and he enjoyed the way that her arms came immediately around her neck. “Have you had enough of that?” he asked, lips hovering over hers. He felt the brush of her down the bond, and knew that she was trying to read him. 

“Of that?” she breathed, “… but definitely not enough of you.” Her hand moved through his hair, and Lucien held her eyes as she smiled at him again, “What is it that you want, mate?”

Lucien snaked an arm beneath Elain and lifted her to himself before moving up the bed to lay her gently against the pillows. “I want your hands on me while I fuck you.” He murmured, lips against her ear. An instant later one of Elain’s soft hands moved down his back and he felt her give a soft laugh beneath him. 

“Alright…”

Sliding one of his own hands up her thigh, Lucien lifted it and brought it up to hook around his waist and he pushed himself inside of her once again. He enjoyed the panted breath she released against his cheek as her other hand carded though his hair and she held him close. As he began to move steadily inside of her, Lucien felt Elain clutch at him and his heart began to beat so quickly and heavily that he thought he might break a rib. This was what he enjoyed. The freedom to be with his mate in such a way that he could hear her reactions to everything he did, as well as feel her response to him. He liked feeling her hands on him as she stroked him and pulled at him and held on tightly as she desperately tried to bring him closer, seeking more of what he could do for her. Lifting one of his own hands to her cheek, Lucien brushed her gorgeous hair back from her face, deciding that he would remind her exactly what it was that he could do for her.


	184. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Four

**Chapter 184**

Elain gave a scream, her blood pounding through her veins and her heart thumping in her head in time with Lucien’s. She could feel him through the bond, and she gave a gasp as she felt him follow her over his own edge, his pleasure washing down the bond to her, flowing through her an instant after her own. 

“Fuck…” he breathed, his face pressed into her neck, “Did you feel that twice too?” Elain nodded, unable to open her eyes. She tightened her arms around him, running her hand up and down his slick back as he panted against her skin. Lucien’s hips shifted over her, and Elain felt him pull out of her. She tightened her legs around him, however, not letting him move away, and she felt him smile against her throat. “Not done, Petal?” 

“Oh,” Elain murmured, her hand still moving over Lucien’s back, “I am… but… I still want to feel you.” Her eyes opened then when his hands moved over her, up her arms and to her shoulders. His lips grazed her throat before moving to her cheek, and Elain smiled. 

“Like this?” he asked, and she nodded again. 

“Yes, just like that…”

“Well, Petal…” he licked at her, and Elain shuddered, “You can have me like this all night.”

“Don’t make a promise unless you intend to keep it…” she breathed, and Lucien laughed gently. His hands slid back down her body to her hips a moment before she felt his teeth at her throat. “Ohh…” He snickered again, and Elain ran her own hand up and down his back once more. She could feel how much he was enjoying himself, his hands moving ever so carefully over her, and then she tried to shift enough to see his face. “Lucien…?”

“Yeah?” he asked, nose pressed against her jaw before his lifted his head to meet her eyes. 

“Earlier…” she murmured, nervousness sparking within her, “You… When you changed things…” she bit her lip, “You… you didn’t like it, did you?” She had been able to feel his hesitation when he’d held her pinned to the bed. Sure, he’d fucked her good and hard, but there had been something beneath that. Elain hadn’t been able to think clearly enough at the time to try and work out what it was but, thinking about it now, she was pretty sure that he hadn’t liked it.

“It wasn’t that.” He breathed, shifting off of her and to the side. Elain blinked, but then he’d pulled her firmly to himself again, a hand coming up to her cheek. “Pinning you like that…” he began and Elain couldn’t help but watch his face intently, trying to read him, “I… I like your reaction to it. I enjoy that. Your excitement is more than enough for me…” he gave her a bit of a grin before he went on, “But… I feel holding you down like that is…” he tilted his head, and Elain frowned. 

“I didn’t mean to make you do something you don’t like…”

“No…” he shook his head, stopping her from saying anything further, “No, it’s not that at all. And I’m not saying that I don’t want to do it, especially as you do enjoy it… It’s just not my favourite.” He pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose, and something within Elain eased a little. “I much prefer… well… what really does it for me, I guess, is being gentle with you.” One of his hands ghosted up her side, “It’s something that I’ve never had with anyone really, nothing has felt as good as getting to touch you like that… and having you touch me…” He kissed her softly, and Elain thought she might melt, “I love being inside of you, my hands on you… and being able to pay attention to every breath you take, I love being able to feel every move, every touch…” Elain slid an arm around his neck, holding him closer, “I don’t even have the words to describe what that does to me.”

“You?” she smiled, “Out of words?”

“I know.” He murmured, a wicked smile across his handsome face, “What is happening?”

Hooking a leg around him again, Elain shifted herself until she was atop him, straddling him as she looked down at him on his back now. “And what about this?” she asked, grinning.

“Oh, Petal.” Lucien’s words were as soft as a breath, and his eyes appeared locked on her face. “Watching you enjoy yourself is…” he shook his head, apparently still unable to find the words he wanted. Elain could feel him, though. His appreciation for her was bright and clear down the bond, and it touched something deep within her.

Running her hands up Lucien’s chest, Elain leaned forward to better look at him, holding his eyes as she tried to sort through everything she could feel. She had been a little surprised that he had said he preferred being gentle with her, especially considering how he had so often been with her in the past; rough and passionate. Elain and enjoyed that, and she had liked that it had shown her how much he wanted her. And he did, she knew that. Now she thought about it, however, Elain wondered if that had been the driving force of the bond, wanting to be closer to her, needing her to accept the bond. Rough and passionate had been how the bond had pushed Lucien to be but, now that she was his, perhaps those gentle touches were how he wanted to be. “Tell me if you don’t like something.” She said, eyes still on his. 

Lifting a hand to her cheek, he smiled up at her. “Oh, Petal. I like it all.” He told her, “It all has its place and purpose… and I couldn’t honestly say that I won’t bend you over that kitchen counter in the morning and have my way with you…” Elain thought she might have blushed at those words, “I’m just saying that being able to trace my fingers over your perfect skin while you cling to me, moaning my name, brings me pleasure beyond anything else I can even imagine…”

She definitely blushed at those words. Elain could feel her face heat, feel her heartbeat begin to race again, and she slid a hand down Lucien’s chest, past his stomach, and her eyes remained on his face when she carefully took hold of him. His heart thundered in her head, and she smiled as she ran that hand over him, her touch firm and purposeful and, before long, she had him just how she needed him. Elain smiled as she lifted herself onto her knees, positioning him beneath her, before she sank onto him, bracing herself against Lucien’s chest with her left hand and letting out a soft moan as her eyes slid closed. 

Lucien’s hands both came to her hips, holding her still, and Elain opened her eyes to look at him, wanting to move. “Lucien…?”

“Slowly,” he breathed, lifting those eyes, both russet and gold, to meet her gaze. “Slow… careful…”

Nodding, Elain did as he instructed, moving her hips in the way he guided her with his hands. All the while she watched him, making sure that she paid attention to what was coming her way down the bond. If her mate wanted slow and careful, that was exactly what she was going to give him, and she was going to watch him enjoy every moment of it.


	185. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Five

**Chapter 185**

“He what?” Nesta asked, turning curious blue-grey eyes on Elain who was reclining on the couch in the sun. Elain glanced at her sister before looking back to the window through which that amazing sunshine was streaming into one of Helion’s private libraries.

“Prefers to be gentle.” Elain repeated what she had told her sister. Nesta made a surprised sound, and Elain glanced her way once more. She hadn’t ever really pictured herself having a conversation like this with Nesta. It had been all too easy to imagine having it with Feyre, because her younger sister practically never shut up about it these days, but Nesta had never really been the type. Her elder sister was always ready to discuss books she had read and fictional scenarios, but this was different. Elain was surprised.

“So… he’s not rough with you…?” 

“Not unless I want him to be…” Elain said, then considered the drive of the bond, “Mostly.”

“Do you?” Nesta asked, eyes still wide. “Want him to be?”

Elain couldn’t help a grin, enjoying the look on Nesta’s face probably more than she should be. “Sometimes.”

Nesta was looking at her as if not sure who she was. “Elain…”

“What?” Elain asked, trying to make her expression as innocent as she could. “… It’s…” she felt her face heat then, and gave up any pretence of innocence. “It’s…” she looked at her hands. “Seeing him like that… is…”

“Is that what you like?” Nesta asked, and her surprise was clear across her face. 

“I do like it…”

“Oh.”

“Oh?” Elain asked, raising an eyebrow at her sister. 

“I’m just surprised.” Nesta replied, “I would not have thought that would be your preference.”

“You wouldn’t…”

“No, I would have thought you would prefer it gentle.” Nesta looked at her, “Sweet and loving…”

“Well, I do like that…”

Nesta gave a small laugh then, and Elain stared at her. “Which do you like more?”

“I…” Elain shook her head, “I don’t know.” She replied, “Do I have to prefer one over the other?” She watched Nesta who was just looking at her thoughtfully. 

“Do you not have a preference?” She asked, “If you could choose…”

Elain gave a half shrug, thinking about Lucien. She really did enjoy when he was being driven to touch her, and there seemed to be fire moving within him, that need so strong down the bond that it almost feels like her own. The way he kissed her when he got like that, the way his hands were so sure and steady as they pulled her dress from her and spread her out before himself… She felt herself blush at the thought. She did enjoy when he held her down on the bed so that he could do whatever it was he liked to her… that hand at her throat. “I…” she breathed, trying to swallow. “Well…” She did also very much enjoy Lucien when he was gentle too. The loving almost reverent way that his hands glided over her skin, his kiss still hot, but yielding to her. The way that his lips would move against hers and then her throat and the way that he would whisper in her ear as he moved carefully inside of her… “Well…” she swallowed again, her blood heating in her veins. “It really depends…”

“Are you fantasising right now?” Nesta asked, her voice accusing. 

“No…” Elain retorted, “I… am considering my answer…”

“Well?”

“It depends.” Elain replied, clearing her throat. “It depends on Lucien, and the situation, and really what we’re in the mood for.” She paused then, “The bond too…” she went on. “Sometimes it really pushes… and sometimes it seems to react to us…” She thought about that. “It’s always different…” she said.

“Really?” Nesta asked, running a hand over her face, her eyes still thoughtful. “And he listens to you?” She asked, “Lucien? He listens to what you want, even with the bond pushing?”

“Of course.” Elain said, trying to resist a frown. “He always has, even back in the Night Court before we started this trip… He’s always been able to feel it so strongly, and somehow he fought it. He’s always been respectful of me and what I wanted and what I was ready for…” she looked at her hands, twisting in her lap, “I don’t know how he did that, Nes.” She said, “Once I could feel it like he had been able to, I… I didn’t have control…”

“I suppose…” Nesta said after a moment, “He had cause to resist it. But when you accepted the bond, what cause did you have to resist?”

“You’re right.” Elain agreed, chewing on her lower lip, “Once I could feel it, he was mine… I didn’t need to fight it.” She looked at her sister. 

“I am surprised that he prefers to be gentle…” Nesta said then, a wry grin tugging at the very corners of her lips. “Feyre told me that Autumn Court males are meant to fuck like they have fire in their blood.”

“Oh, he does.” Elain said, her tone devoid of any emotion, but she was unable to help a snicker when Nesta’s mouth dropped open. “Even when gentle.” She added, and she was more than a little pleased to see her sister blush slightly. 

“So… he… he’s… _good_ … at it?” Nesta asked, and Elain stared at her sister, not sure why Nesta was so interested in this. “Well, I mean, imagine if you were mated to someone who wasn’t…”

“Would that matter?” Elain asked, “I doubt that could be the case anyway with the bond…”

“So he is then?”

“Yes.” Elain told her, tone matter of fact. “He’s _very_ good at it.” She watched Nesta take that in, and her sister nodded more to herself than Elain. Elain watched noting that Nesta looked as if she were about to say something else, and she could practically see the thoughts flicking through her sister’s mind. Wondering then, just what it was that had sparked this interest and this directness from Nesta, Elain grinned and sat up on the couch, the sun still shining brightly down on her, heating her skin just a little. “What’s brought this on, Nes?” she asked, trying very hard indeed to keep herself from grinning. “Does it have anything to do with Cassian?”

“What? No? Of course it doesn’t.” Nesta rolled her eyes, but Elain knew her better than that. 

“It does, doesn’t it?” she pressed, “Oh, Nes. Tell me.”

“No… I mean… it doesn’t really.” Nesta said, her eyes on the window and definitely not on Elain. “It’s not as if I feel any driving force trying to throw me at him. I don’t feel the desire to rip his clothes off every time he walks into the room.”

“I’m sure he thinks that’s a shame.” Elain said, and Nesta raised an eyebrow before nodding her agreement. 

“I… I was just thinking… if… if… something were to happen…” Nesta’s long fingers pushed into her usually immaculate hair, messing it up slightly, “How… how do you think he would be?”

Elain hadn’t expected that question, and she made sure to keep her expression neutral as she thought about it. “I imagine that he would be however you wanted him to be.” She told Nesta after a moment, “It is all too easy to imagine that he has a … passionate… touch.” She watched Nesta’s face carefully as she spoke now, “But I would think that, like Lucien, he would also rather enjoy being more… tender.”

Nesta was silent as she took in Elain’s words, and Elain just watched her sister. Nesta’s blue-grey eyes turned on the window and her sister just nodded, still silent as she evidently thought about that. “Yes…” Nesta murmured, “I think you’re right.”


	186. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Six

**Chapter 186**

“Don’t you want to stay?” Lucien looked at his mother who sat across from him on the long plush couch. Ashk met his eyes, her chin held high and he could practically see her forming her response in her mind. “Don’t you want to…” he paused, “I haven’t seen you for so long. Not properly…”

“I…” Sadness washed over her features then, and Lucien’s heart sank. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. “Now that Eris is High Lord you are welcome to come and visit.” She said, her long slender hands lifting to take hold of the end of one of her braids. “He has said that you are welcome at the Autumn Court, and you could stay as long as you like… You could come for Mabon…”

“I don’t mean a visit.” Lucien said, shifting closer to her on the couch. “I mean that you could live here… I could see you every day. You could … see… “ _Helion_ he had wanted to say, but he did not. She knew what he meant, Lucien could see it in her eyes before she lowered them to look at the end of her braid being pulled again and again through her gentle hands. 

“He has not asked me to stay.”

“I… thought he did.” Lucien frowned. Ashk didn’t meet his eyes, still looking at her hair. 

“It is right that I return to the Autumn Court.”

“But…” Stopping himself, Lucien twisted his own hands together. He felt like a youngling, begging his mother for her attention. He had missed her in the long decades since he had left the Autumn Court and Beron had pretty much prevented him from seeing her except briefly on official visits when he had no other choice. Lucien wanted time with her, he wanted to know that she was nearby and he wanted to see her every day. Somehow he had fooled himself into believing that he would be able to have that and, now that the possibility had been taken from him, it hurt.

“I can come and visit you.” She said gently, and Lucien looked up at her. “If you are staying here…”

“Elain and I need to have that conversation.” He said and then, catching his mother’s look, he went on. “I think it is likely we will stay here.” His heart hurt, and Lucien tried to think of anything to make it stop. He did not think that it was reasonable to get this upset about his mother not staying in the same court that he was. He was an adult, and he had been without her for so long. And that was the problem, he thought. When she reached across to him, setting one of her elegant hands on his knee, Lucien met her eyes again. 

“Mabon is soon.” She told him. “Come and visit me for it.” She smiled, “I have already asked Elain and she liked the sound of it. I even believe Nesta may visit.”

“I don’t know if Nesta is your most persuasive argument.”

“No… but your mate is.” His mother said, giving him a knowing smile. “Elain wants to return. She wants to see more of the Court, and I know that there are places you wish to show her.” It was true, Lucien had to agree. He had hoped for more time in the Autumn Court to show Elain all the beauty of the place. 

“Mabon.” He agreed, and his mother smiled brightly at him. 

“And then I shall come and visit you.” She promised, “Wherever you may be.”

“I would like that.”

When his mother’s hand rubbed his knee, Lucien glanced up at her face again. He watched as she thought about something before she licked her lower lip, and he knew that she was about to ask whatever it was that she had been wondering. “Has… has Elain’s acceptance of the bond changed things between you?”

“Oh…” tilting his head, Lucien considered. “I suppose it has and it hasn’t.” he replied after a moment. “It hasn’t changed what we want. That we want one another, and that we love one another. It hasn’t changed that we’re sure about that.” He smiled at the certainty he still felt, “That is very much as it has been… but what it has changed…” he paused to consider for a moment, “Is the drive behind it.” He bit his lip, “Before she had accepted the bond, I constantly had this need to get to her, to put my hands on her, to feel her, to smell her… I wanted to claim her.” He looked at his hands, feeling his face heat just a little, “That has somewhat eased. Especially since the frenzy came to an end.” He smiled then, “I still want to do all of those things… but I don’t worry now that I will stop paying attention for a moment, and then find myself pinning her to a wall…”

“Was that a concern before?” She asked, raising an eyebrow, and Lucien nodded. 

“Yes.” He said seriously, “When I first returned to the Night Court for her there was an evening where she walked in on me in the kitchen… and it took everything in me to…” he drew a deep breath, remembering how he had lifted Elain onto Rhysand’s kitchen bench, pressing himself to her, trying to control everything in him which had been screaming at him to take her. “It was only my realisation that she had been a virgin that had enabled me to control myself. I clung to that knowledge, knowing that nobody else had touched her, and that I wasn’t going to let her first time be forced and crude on a kitchen bench…” He made himself meet his mother’s eyes then. “The drive behind those urges was so strong. If I wasn’t continually keeping them in check I don’t know what I might have done…”

“You did well.” She told him, and Lucien felt a spark of pride deep within himself. “For so long…”

“It got easier.” He said, “When she began to want me in return…” Allowing himself a small smile then, Lucien went on. “When I got to touch her… hold her… it got easier.”

“And now?” she asked, and he grinned. 

“Now I get to have her every day.” He said, “It doesn’t need to push me…”

She leaned toward him then, and Lucien smiled more brightly when she brought a hand to his cheek. “You are lucky.” She told him, and he nodded.

“I never would have thought of myself so in the past.” He gave a rueful smile then, “It was worth it, though.”

“You come from love.” She said, her eyes on his, “How could you not have been destined for great love in your own life?” Lucien’s heart seemed to swell at those words, and he leaned further forward, wrapping his arms around his mother before she could so much as react. When her gentle arms came around him in turn, he pressed his face into her fragrant hair. It had been so very long since he had gotten to hug her like this, and he tightened his hold just a little, knowing that with her gone again, he wouldn’t get to do it every day. 

“I love you.” He murmured, and he closed his eyes when one of her hands rubbed gently at his back. 

“And I love you.” She replied, her voice soft and soothing.


	187. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Seven

**Chapter 187**

Elain had rather become accustomed to being able to feel Lucien down the bond. As they had grown closer and she had become more adept at using it and understanding it, the bond had steadily grown clearer and clearer. When she had formally and officially accepted it, the full force of it had hit her, and she wasn’t yet used to the sheer intensity of the emotions that she would feel from him and, as she sat with Nesta in Helion’s library, she pressed a hand to her chest when a wave of sadness washed over her. “Lucien…” she murmured, closing her eyes, and trying to focus on what she was feeling from him. Nesta, reading nearby in the sun, appeared not to have noticed. 

He was hurt. Elain could tell that. Not physically and, as far as she could tell, he was in no danger. Someone had hurt him, though. He had told her that he wished to speak with his mother earlier in the morning, and Elain wondered if it had been Ashk. She couldn’t really see the Lady of the Autumn Court intentionally hurting her beloved son, however, so she wondered what had happened. Perhaps it had not been Ashk at all who had hurt him. Perhaps it had been Helion. Wanting to get up and go to find him, Elain forced herself to remain in her seat by the window. He had needed to have important conversations with his parents, and she would allow him the time and space to do so. Just because somebody had possibly said something to him that he hadn’t enjoyed didn’t mean that he needed her to go running off to find him and take care of it. She still wanted to, though. 

Instead, Elain focused on the window, her eyes moving over the spectacular view outside, as she tried to take in every little thing that was reaching her down the bond. It wasn’t just hurt that Lucien was feeling, there was also a little pride, and there was love. His mother, then. He was likely still speaking with Ashk. Elain wondered what she might have said to Lucien that would have caused him such hurt. 

Unable to focus, Elain flicked through the book in her lap. Why would the bond have showed her that emotion from Lucien if she wasn’t meant to go and see if he was alright. It had always shown her visions of things that had allowed her to get to know him better, to better understand him, and therefore grow and develop their relationship. These things had never been arbitrary. So why would it now send her something like that if she was just meant to ignore it?

She had just resolved herself to give him ten minutes before she went looking for him, when Elain realised that she could hear Lucien’s heartbeat growing louder. She could practically feel him getting closer and, by the time he had pushed open the large heavy doors to the library and walked in, she was on her feet and moving toward him before she had realised what she was doing.

“Petal…” Lucien had barely gotten the word out when Elain threw herself at him, wrapping her arms firmly around his neck as his own wound around her waist as he lifted her from the floor. 

“Are you alright?” she asked, her cheek pressed to his as one of her hands moved up the back of his neck and into his hair. 

“Yes. Would I not be?” he asked, and Elain’s feet were back on the ground an instant later. She looked up at him, trying to read his face, but found nothing but curiosity. 

“I… I could feel…” She bit her lip, glancing around at Nesta who had finally looked up from her book and was watching them. “How did your talk with your mother go?”

“Ah.” He gave what she thought might be a rueful smile then, “She is returning to the Autumn Court.”

“She isn’t staying here?” Elain asked, watching as Lucien shook his head, “But… what about Helion?”

“He hasn’t asked her to stay.”

“Oh…” Elain frowned, looking down at her hands and wondering if she had misread Ashk and Helion’s relationship, “I thought they…”

“As did I.”

“Maybe…” Nesta put in, and both Elain and Lucien turned to face her, “They just need to have a simple conversation and admit that they want one another.”

“Yeah,” Lucien muttered, and Elain saw his eyes narrow at Nesta, “imagine that being the only obstacle standing between two people being together…”

Elain turned away quickly before Nesta would be able to see her face. “Have you spoken to your father?” she asked Lucien who shook his head. 

“No.” he replied, “I thought I would speak to you first. We need to settle on some things before I have some conversations with him.”

“We do?”

“Yes.” He took one of her hands in his, “Would you like to talk now?” His russet and golden eyes flicked Nesta’s way for an instant before returning to settle on Elain’s own. “Unless you were occupied…”

“No, we were just reading…”

“See you at dinner.” Nesta murmured, returning to her book and Elain smiled before allowing Lucien to lead her out of the library and into the hallway. 

She had thought that they might return to their suite, but Lucien lead them out onto one of the many balconies of the palace, into the fresh air and bright sunlight. “What did you want to talk about?” She asked, “Are you upset that your mother is leaving? Was that why you were hurt? You wanted her to stay here where you could see her every day?”

Russet and golden eyes slanted a glance at Elain and she fell silent, realising that she had just asked a bunch of questions, but given him no chance to reply. “That did hurt.” He told her gently, “It felt petulant and silly, but I suppose I had hoped she would remain because, well partly, because she would want the chance to be close to me…” he smiled at her then, “Which leads me to what I wanted to ask you…”

“Does it?”

“Do you want to stay here?” he asked, and Elain raised her eyebrows at the directness of that question. She looked out over the balcony to the view which was nearly as good here as the one from the library had been. She wanted a home. She had known that for so long now, just as she knew that that home would be wherever Lucien was and wherever he was happy. She hadn’t really picked a Court to focus that particular fantasy on, but she knew that they had options.

“I want you.” She told him. “And I have you… so I am happy.” Elain stopped walking then and turned to face Lucien. “Where would you be happy?” She asked, “Because that is what I want.” Lifting a hand to run up his chest, she met his eyes. “What do you want?”

Lucien held her gaze for a moment before his eyes lowered and he blinked. She could just about see him thinking, that thoughtful expression passing across his features. “I am not sure how to answer that.” He told her, “I’m not used to being asked what I want. I’m so used to being on the periphery, nobody has really cared about what I want for a long time…” Elain imagined that were true, being Emissary to the Spring Court and then the Night Court, not having a home of his own, or a family. “I haven’t been anyone’s priority.”

Lifting both of her hands to Lucien’s face, she held him gently, making him look back up to meet her eyes. “You are not in my periphery.” She told him, “You are all I see.”


	188. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Eight

**Chapter 188**

Having decided that he would speak to Helion after dinner, Lucien walked with Elain around the Palace as they followed the afternoon sun. The views they received of the Day Court as that sun sank golden toward the horizon were stunning, and he revelled in the feel of the warmth on his skin, and Elain’s hand in his as they strolled contentedly alongside one another. This was a life he wouldn’t even need to get used to. He was used to it already. He could, Lucien knew, do this happily every day for the rest of eternity and never grow sick of it.

As the sun sank lower, he turned his head to look down at his mate. Elain’s brown eyes were on the sunset, and he couldn’t help but admire the golden glow to her skin in that gorgeous light, and the way that it lit up her honey-brown hair. She did very much look like she could be the Lady of the Day Court, and he smiled at the fact that this was their future. Shifting closer to her, Lucien slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her in and lifting her slightly to himself as he bent to bring his lips to her forehead. He felt Elain’s hands land lightly on his shoulders, and he heard a soft laugh from her before he released her, smiling down at her and sliding one of his hands down her arm to take her hand again. 

“Would you like to go in, Petal?” he asked, lifting that hand to his lips. Elain’s brown eyes followed her hand, and he saw her smile when he kissed it. 

“We should change for dinner.” She said, her eyes lifting to meet his own. Lucien hadn’t been thinking about changing for dinner, but that didn’t mean that she was wrong. He just smiled by way of response, his heart beating enthusiastically when Elain squeezed his hand a little and settled into an easy stride beside him as they headed for their suite.

Lucien locked the door behind them and by the time he had turned back around, Elain was throwing open the curtains to let the last of the daylight into the room. He watched her open the door to the little garden outside, before she turned her head and looked back at him. He smiled at her, and she walked toward him, her steps even and so very deliberate. He could tell that she knew that he was looking at her, and he could hear her heartbeat quicken as she drew closer. When she reached him, Elain came to a stop and Lucien couldn’t help but lift a hand to her cheek. He brushed her hair back from her face as his other hand came up to her shoulder, drawing her in closer. 

“You weren’t thinking about getting ready for dinner, were you?” she asked, and he knew that his grin was answer enough when he saw her carefully moisten her lips, her eyes moving over his face. “What were you thinking about?” she asked, her head tilting, and Lucien tightened his hold on her. 

“How good our life will be here…” 

“Ah…” Elain held his gaze when her hands slid up his chest and she leaned into him. Breathing in, Lucien took in the familiar scent of the lavender shampoo that she favoured, and his hands slid around to her lower back, sliding down over her arse. He watched as she gasped and blushed a little, even as she leaned further into him, pressing herself to his chest. “That it will.” She breathed, and Lucien’s own heart raced to match Elain’s when she went up on her toes to press her lips against his jaw. “I can see it.”

*

Elain could feel Lucien’s hands shake, his whole body tremble, and she went back down flat on her feet as she lifted her eyes to his face once more. “You can see it?” he asked, those hands clutching at her now. She nodded. It had been something she had been able to see since they had been strolling around the palace in the warm afternoon sun. Lucien had told her that he wished to stay at the Day Court. That had been the choice he had made, and she had happily agreed. As they had taken their leisurely time soaking up that golden sun, images had continued to make their way into her mind. Elain could see her future with Lucien. She could see all of eternity; their lives entwined. The younglings she had first seen the night she had accepted the bond were a part of those images and, sliding one of her hands up the side of Lucien’s throat, she held his gaze. 

“Do you wish to see?” she asked. 

“Yes.” His voice sounded choked, and she smiled gently at him. Elain brushed her fingers carefully across Lucien’s scar, sliding those fingers back into his ruby hair as she reached for the bond. When she had hold of it, she focused her attention on what she had seen, and she pushed all of it toward him. She heard Lucien’s sharp intake of breath and knew that he had seen what she had sent his way. His hands became gentle on her, caressing and smoothing over her dress, and Elain smiled. 

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” she asked, and he nodded, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he gazed down at her. Feeling a tug from the bond then, Elain realised that Lucien was trying to pull her closer and she allowed him to do so. When his hands moved down her thighs, she let him lift her to himself as she moved across the room and toward their bed. Need began to pulse within her, through her veins, and she found herself already tugging at Lucien’s clothing, trying to remove it. He didn’t speak, but he didn’t need to, as he carefully set her atop the bedspread, his hands lifting and moving up her back, taking her dress with them until he could pull it over her head. Elain found herself barely able to draw breath as she just looked up at her mate, watching as those hands went to his own clothing and he had removed it within seconds. Her own hands were on him then, one gliding up his magnificent chest, while the other went to his forearm, gripping him and pulling him toward her. 

Lucien moved over her easily, and Elain wrapped herself around him, hooking her legs behind his own. Her eyes fluttered closed when she felt her mate’s hot lips against her throat, and she bit back a groan when his tongue followed an instant later. He knew exactly the right place to focus his attention in order to draw all kinds of reactions from her, and Elain knew that he was going to enjoy every second of it. He still hadn’t said a word since she had shown him what she had seen of their future, but she could feel him down the bond. She could feel how his heart was beating wildly, and she could feel what seemed to be fire burning within. Elain would have sworn that that fire was in his touch as her skin seemed to be set alight wherever Lucien’s fingers trailed. Her back arched slightly when she felt his teeth scrape against her skin, and she allowed a low moan to escape her.

Carding her fingers through his vibrant hair with one hand, Elain scratched at Lucien’s hip with her other hand, wanting him to move things along a little more quickly. The throbbing need within her was only growing more intense, and her breath was coming in shorter gasps. It was clear that her mate understood what she wanted, as one of his hands slid down between them and Elain felt him adjusting himself over her. When he pressed gently against her then, Elain tightened her hand in Lucien’s hair, “Yes…” she breathed, “Yes… Now…”

Lucien’s lips ghosted across Elain’s throat, and she felt his hot panted breath against her skin as he moved with purpose and determination and pushed into her with one fluid thrust. Elain gave a cry, her hand tightening in his hair again before she released it, not wanting to hurt him. Instead, she clutched at Lucien’s back and shoulders, her eyes closing as he thrust again, his own hands moving over her until he found somewhere to hold on to her, keeping her in place as he established a smooth rhythm.


	189. Chapter One Hundred and Eighty-Nine

**Chapter 189**

When he’d finished, Lucien had remained inside of Elain. She had held him, her fingers trailing up and down his spine as he’d pressed his forehead to hers, his breath hot on her skin. “Was that good?” she breathed, hand gliding over his slick back. He shuddered slightly beneath her touch, and she felt his lips brush hers a moment later. 

“Yes.” He kissed his way across her cheek, up to her ear. “Didn’t you think so?”

“I-I did.” Her hand slid down his back, nails tracing his skin when Lucien’s lips went to her throat. She could feel his contentedness down the bond, hear his heart beating so strong in her head. She smiled when he kissed her, and she knew that he was deliberately focussing on that spot he knew would draw the biggest reactions from her. 

“Is that good…?” he murmured, and Elain nodded as his hands tightened on his hips. 

Lucien pulled out of her then, and Elain held on to him as he shifted and rolled to the side. She went with him, letting him pull her closer again and his arms tightened around her, cradling her to himself. “We should get ready for dinner…” she said, head tucked up under Lucien’s chin. His arms tightened around her again. 

“I don’t want to go anywhere.” He replied, and Elain couldn’t help a smile. 

“We need to eat.” She said, her voice steady, even though she would have preferred to stay just where they were as well. “You also wanted to speak with your father…”

“I did.” Lucien’s breath was gentle against her hair and Elain made herself lift her head to look at him. “I have a few things to speak with him about.”

“Your mother?” she asked, and russet and golden eyes met hers. 

“Yes…” he said, “I… I don’t know what I’ll say though.” Elain could see him thinking as he just looked at her. “Do I just ask him why he hasn’t asked her to stay?”

“I don’t know.” 

“I… maybe I should be more tactful.” Lucien sounded hesitant, and Elain pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I don’t suppose a High Lord would appreciate being questioned so bluntly about his personal relationships.”

“He is your father…”

“Yes.” He agreed, “But… we don’t know each other very well yet.”

“Perhaps this will help you grow closer.” She could feel Lucien’s hope down the bond. He very much wanted that to be true. Smiling at him then, Elain pushed herself higher when Lucien reluctantly released her. “Come on.” She said, “We need to wash before we get dressed.”

“Do we?” he asked, and she could see the teasing smirk on his face. “You don’t want to go to dinner smelling as delicious as you currently do.” Elain felt herself blush.

“I smell sweaty.” She murmured, and one of Lucien’s hands trailed down her thigh. 

“That’s not what I was referring to.” He sat up, bringing his lips to her cheek, his other hand brushing her hair back as he did so. “You smell as good as you taste…”

“Oh…” Elain felt her cheeks heat even further. “Oh… well…” She glanced at Lucien for a moment, “I wouldn’t think you would want anyone else to know what that was like…” Something flickered behind his russet eye then, and Elain was able to make out a territorial look as he shifted and seemed to become possessive. 

“No…” And instant later Lucien had lifted Elain into his arms and had gotten off the bed. “No, I don’t…”

She just smiled up at him as he strode toward the bathroom, holding her carefully. 

*

Dinner seemed to go forever, and Lucien was well and truly over it before dessert was even brought into the room. It wasn’t that anyone was doing anything particularly bothersome, or speaking of anything that got under his skin, but he couldn’t help but watch Helion and his mother. The both of them continued to glance at one another, and hold polite conversation, but the tension was so thick that he could barely breathe and he did not know how either of them could stand it. 

Letting out an annoyed huff, Lucien turned his head when Elain’s hand slid into his lap. He wrapped one of his own hands around hers and gave her a small smile when he caught her concerned expression. “It’s fine.” He murmured, and watched as her brown eyes looked past him toward Helion and Ashk. 

“I’m sure.” She replied, those eyes lifting to his once again. Not caring that they were at the dinner table and the entire Court was present, Lucien bent to press a kiss to his mate’s lips. She smiled brightly at him, and he felt warmth spread throughout his bods in response. He was more than a little pleased that she had become more comfortable with public displays of affection like that. He enjoyed claiming her in front of everyone, and he suspected it might feel the same way for her, especially after Sorcha. Elain could be as territorial as he could be, and Lucien truly loved it. “Will you draw him away after dessert?” she asked, and he made himself think about what she was talking about. 

“Oh, Helion?” he nodded, “Yes. When the tables are away and everyone is moving around the room. I wouldn’t want to be too obvious.” He said, “It might make it worse for my mother…” Elain’s eyes shifted past him again, and he knew that she was watching Ashk. 

“I suppose it may embarrass her…” She agreed, looking at him once more, “If she thought you were questioning Helion about her.”

“And I wouldn’t want that.”

Elain smiled at him before returning her attention to the delicious looking fruit tart on her plate and Lucien let his own gaze slide once more to his father. The High Lord of the Day Court was making a show of appraising his own fruit tart, but Lucien caught that amber gaze shifting repeatedly to Ashk sitting across from him. He didn’t understand whatever game the two of them were playing, and it was pissing him off. 

Once the table was cleared and the fae of the Day Court were free to move around and mingle with one another, Lucien looked for his opening. Elain’s hand traced his arm from his elbow to his wrist, and her brown eyes peered at him over her shoulder as she moved past him and toward Ashk. Lucien understood then that she was attempting to keep his mother occupied so that she wouldn’t notice him heading for Helion. Smiling at his mate, Lucien nodded his head in acknowledgement and moved toward the High Lord of the Day Court. 

Helion was standing by one of the large fireplaces, his eyes on the window and the darkness outside. “Lucien…” The High Lord said when Lucien approached him. 

“High Lord.”

“You needn’t call me that.”

“As you wish.”

“You have something you wish to discuss with me?” Helion asked, “I did notice you watching me throughout the entirety of dinner.”

“Oh.” Lucien figured just about anyone with eyes would have noticed the way that he had watched his father throughout dinner. He’d looked at the older male probably just as many times as Helion had looked at Ashk. “Yes… I have a few things I would like to speak with you about.”

“By all means…”


	190. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety

**Chapter 190**

Following Helion into a secluded corner of the dining room, Lucien found himself focusing on random details of the room that he had previously not noticed. The floor was very nice, he had decided. The polished stone all but reflected the flickering firelight from around the room, almost giving the impression that there was twice as much light in the room as there actually was. When he looked up, his father was standing by a window, and Lucien let his eyes move over it. Soft crimson curtains hung before it, and he smiled as he looked at them. They kind of reminded him of the Autumn Court, and he wondered if his mother had noticed them at all. If she had, no doubt they would have helped her feel a little more at home. Lucien wondered idly if Helion had considered that when choosing them. 

“What was it that you wished to speak with me about?” The High Lord asked, turning his amber eyes on Lucien once more. Lucien twisted his hands together, meeting that intense look.

“A few things.” He said, “First… I have spoken with Elain, and both of us do indeed wish to remain here…to make the Day Court our home.”

“Ah.” Helion’s smile was a bright as the sun, “This does please me…”

“I’m glad.” Lucien couldn’t deny the warmth that spread deep within him at the way that Helion was looking at him, and that his father was happy he would stay. “I… think that we will be happy here. We will be. Elain saw… well, she saw some very…” he smiled, not knowing what words he should use for what Elain had shown him of her visions of their future. Helion smiled back at him, and Lucien knew that the High Lord had understood.

“Very well.” Helion’s eyes flicked across the room before returning to Lucien. “Would you like somewhere else to reside, or is the current suite to your liking?”

“Oh, I… I think we’re fine where we are…” He blinked. He would check with Elain later, but he figured that they were both comfortable in the suite they now occupied. It did hold some rather delicious memories, after all. “Ah… also… my duties as your son and heir…?” He met Helion’s eyes once again. 

“Would you be able to outline them for me? I would like to know exactly what I should be doing…”

“Many of the things you would be used to doing as Emissary.” Helion gave a bit of a shrug. “Things will change here and there…” The High Lord gave a smile, “We will adjust as necessary.”

Lucien nodded, his eyes moving over the red curtains again. He lifted a hand to touch one, allowing the velvety fabric to run between his fingers. “Fair enough…”

“I will have a comprehensive list drawn up and sent to you by morning.”

“I would appreciate that.” He continued to stroke the curtain until Helion cleared his throat a little, and Lucien flicked his gaze to his father. 

“Was there anything else weighing on your mind?” Helion asked, “I assume that you managed to tether yourself to Elain to help her with her Seer issues?”

“I did.” Lucien nodded, “Well, I think I did.”

“I believe you would be aware if you had not.”

“I…” Lucien bit his lip, glancing from his father to the curtain and then back again, “these remind me of the Autumn Court.”

Helion’s eyes flicked just a little too quickly to the curtain in Lucien’s hand and then across the room and then back to the curtain before he met Lucien’s eyes once more. “Do they?” he asked, not quite managing to sound unconcerned. Lucien grinned.

“Yes.” He replied, “I believe I’ve seen some like this in my mother’s bedchamber…” 

“What a coincidence.” Helion lifted his chin and Lucien only barely resisted rolling his eyes. 

“You are aware that she is returning to the Autumn Court?”

“I would assume that was her plan, yes.” His reply was emotionless, and Lucien just looked at him, “She wished to remain until after your mating frenzy had completed. She wished to check on you… and on Elain…”

“She has done so…”

“Yes. Hence I would have figured she would be leaving shortly.”

Lucien shook his head, unable to help running a hand through his red hair in frustration. “She doesn’t have to.”

“That is her choice.” Helion replied, his tone flat. “She can make her own choices now that Beron is gone.”

“She can.”

“Eris does not hold her on the same leash…”

“No,” Lucien agreed, “He would allow her to choose whatever makes her happy.”

“Indeed.”

Lucien dropped the curtain and just looked at the High Lord. After a moment, he shook his head once more. “If you asked her to stay…” he began and Helion took a step back. Lucien paused for only a second but went on. “She told me that you have not…”

“I…” Helion looked away. “She once told me that the Autumn Court is in her blood. That she belongs there.”

“She once told me the same thing.” Lucien agreed. 

Nodding, Helion lifted a hand to his own black hair. “She is free to choose what she wants. I will not attempt to sway her choice.”

"I… I don’t believe that letting her know that she would be welcome to stay is swaying her choice… but rather letting her know that she has a choice.” Lucien looked at the older male, “Right now I think she believes that her only option is to go back…”

Helion looked across the room again, and Lucien felt his heart sink when the High Lord set his jaw and his expression seemed to shut down. “She must make her own choice.”

“Uh…” Lucien did not know what to say, and ran a hand over his face, trying to bite back something sharp that would no doubt get him in trouble.

“I believe I will retire for the night.” Helion was moving away from Lucien before he could say anything further. “I will have that list delivered to you by morning. Good night.”

Lucien just watched him go before he headed back across the room to find Elain. She was sitting with Nesta, and the two of them were pouring over some book held in their laps and between them. Glancing at Cassian who sat nearby, Lucien raised an eyebrow in question.

“It’s some kind of smut.” Cassian informed him and Lucien raised both eyebrows, glancing at Elain and her sister. 

“You wish.” Nesta muttered, her steely eyes flicking up from the book to pierce the Illyrian before looking back down to something Elain had pointed at. Lucien just grinned as he sank into a chair, watching the scene play out before him. He knew that Nesta and Cassian would likely be leaving in the morning, just as his mother was, and he knew that Elain would want to spend as much time with her sister as she could. He had no intention of pulling her away and depriving her of every minute she got to spend with Nesta. 

Glancing around the room, Lucien noticed then that his mother had also disappeared for the night, and he wondered if she had gone to pack, or if she had gone looking for Helion. He didn’t suppose he would find out until morning.


	191. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-One

**Chapter 191**

Elain cried when Nesta left the next morning. Lucien wrapped an arm around her shoulders, rubbing a hand up and down her arm as they watched her sister head down the road that would take them to the border with the Night Court, Cassian at her side. 

“It’s really not that far.” Lucien told his mate, impressed that she had kept it together until Nesta had actually left. “You can visit her whenever you like… and she can visit you. You know that she will.” He looked down at Elain who was nodding, wiping the back of her hand across her face. 

“It’s not that.” She replied, voice soft, “We’ve been apart before… it’s that now we will actually live apart. Our homes are no longer the same place…”

Lucien continued to stroke her arm, able to appreciate the difference in that. “I see…” He held her a little tighter. “It’s okay to feel that loss…” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her hair. “Just remember that you haven’t lost your sister, though.”

“I know.” She turned toward him then, when Nesta was out of sight, and her arms snaked around his waist. Lucien held her carefully, rubbing her back when she pressed her face into his chest. One of his hands came up to stroke her hair, and he continued to murmur softly to her about all of the times they would be able to invite Nesta to visit the Day Court, and that he was sure that would mean that she would get to see Cassian again too, as the Illyrian would no doubt follow Nesta wherever she went. When he heard Elain give a soft laugh at that, he smiled. “I hope he at least gives her privacy in the bathroom.” He added, and Elain looked up at him, horrified. 

Lucien’s gaze caught on the road again, then, and he watched silently as his mother headed down it. Elain turned in his arms then, and he heard her soft exhalation. “I was so surprised this morning when she said she was still leaving…”

“I…” Lucien paused. He had been disappointed, but not surprised. Not after his conversation with Helion the night before. “I had hoped she would stay.”

“I know.” Elain turned back to him before going up on her toes and pressing her soft lips to his cheek. “Why did he not ask her to stay?”

“He said it was up to her to make her own choice.” Lucien replied, his hands still moving over Elain’s back, one sliding up into her hair.

“Not much of a choice if she doesn’t know it exists…”

“That’s what I told him.” He glanced down to meet her brown eyes.

“I’m sorry.” She breathed, “I know that you wanted to be able to make up for so much time lost with her.” Lucien felt those words, his heart aching at the thought of losing that hope. He nodded and Elain’s arms tightened around his waist. “We will visit the Autumn Court.” She told him, “And you will have that time with her…” She was still looking up at him when she went on, “I know it won’t be the same as that nice domestic ideal of the everyday… but at least you will be able to see her and spend time with her. Eris will welcome you…”

“And you.” Lucien said, “I do believe the High Lord of the Autumn Court is fond of you.” Elain’s pretty smile warmed Lucien’s heart then, and he lifted a hand to brush some of her lovely hair back from her face.

“Fond of me?” She asked, “Why?”

“There are so many reasons to be fond of you, Petal…”

“Well, I am certain his would be different to yours.” She replied, rolling her eyes slightly, and Lucien nodded. 

“No doubt.” He winked at her, making a show of looking her over appreciatively. His heart beat enthusiastically at the laugh she gave then. “Have you not noticed it, though?”

“I… don’t know.” She answered, frowning just a little as she thought about his question. “He has saved my life twice…” Elain’s brown eyes lifted to meet his again, “When your other brothers found me in that Courtyard and Eris freed me from them and told me to run to you…”

Lucien tried very hard not to think about what would have happened to Elain if Eris had not been there in time. “Yes…”

“And when the balcony…” she shuddered visibly, “He wouldn’t let himself be rescued until I was taken first…” She smiled, “Also he prevented me falling off the edge in a panic…”

“So… what I’m hearing is that Eris Vanserra is your hero…” His tone was teasing, and Elain’s smile widened. 

“Do you think I should tell him that when we visit?” she asked, and Lucien shook his head. He tightened his hold on her, sliding his own arm around her waist pulling her to himself as he lifted her from the ground. Elain’s arms shifted to wrap around his shoulders and the back of his neck. 

“I might get jealous.” He said, unable to help the wide smile spread across his face. Elain raised an eyebrow at him. 

“I couldn’t have that…” she said, bringing her lips to within a hair’s breadth from his, but no further. Lucien tried to close the distance between them, but Elain was exceptionally good at holding her space. “What… can I do… to prove that you needn’t be jealous?” she breathed, and he saw the wicked smile she wore when she met his eyes. 

“I can think of a few things…”

“Oh?” She asked, glancing around them. Lucien knew that they were the only ones out here on this balcony, and he couldn’t so much as hear anyone moving nearby. “Any that are suitable for…” her eyes swept the balcony again, and Lucien stared at her. She had never been one for this type of thing. Not somewhere they could get caught like this. The closest they had gotten was behind that curtain but even then they’d had something to hide behind. There was no curtain out on the balcony to shroud themselves with. 

When Elain sank down onto her knees, looking up at him with those wide brown eyes, Lucien thought immediately of the Eisblume Garden in the Winter Court, and realised that she had done this before. They had been spotted then. He hadn’t known at the time, but the High Lord of the Winter Court and his Lady had witnessed what Elain had done for him in that garden. Casting a critical glance around them, Lucien hoped that nobody had eyes on them right now. Elain didn’t seem fussed however, or rather she didn’t seem to be thinking about anything other than him, and Lucien did not mind one bit. 

Threading his fingers into her hair, Lucien whispered words of encouragement to Elain as she unlaced his pants before wrapping a hand around him as she made herself more comfortable. Leaning back against the edge of the balcony, Lucien cast his eyes up at the wispy morning clouds and gasped when his mate set about using that hand ever so perfectly on him. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” He muttered, eyes sliding closed as his head tilted back. His hands couldn’t stay still, and he continued to stroke and caress Elain, messing up her hair, and then smoothing it down again, until he lost all sense of what he was doing when she finally took him into her mouth.


	192. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Two

**Chapter 192**

Elain chewed her lower lip as she strolled through the hallways of Helion’s palace. The High Lord had sent word for her to meet him in one of his private libraries, and she didn’t know the reason. Thinking back to earlier in the morning after she and Lucien had watched Nesta, Cassian, and Ashk leave the Day Court, she bit down harder on her lip. Perhaps Helion knew what they had done… what she had done… Perhaps she was about to be reprimanded for it. She had known that there was a chance they would have been seen, as it wasn’t as if that balcony had been private and open only to them. Lucien had been hurt though, she had been able to feel it through the bond as he had watched his mother leave. She had wanted to do something about that, make him feel better, if only for a while. And she had enjoyed it, she couldn’t deny that. Elain always enjoyed that.

Swallowing thickly as she rounded a corner and caught sight of the doors to the library, she drew a deep breath. What would she do if Helion was angry with her? Elain didn’t know if she would be able to stand there and talk to him about it, or if she would become so embarrassed that she would have to run. She wished that Lucien had come with her, but Helion had sent the message for her to join him in the library with another for Lucien with a task of his own.

Elain paused by the door, trying to work up the courage to walk in and find out what it was that her mate’s father wanted with her. She could feel her heart thundering in her chest, and then there was something else. After a moment, Elain realised that it was coming down the bond to her. Not one of Lucien’s own emotions, but something for her. It felt calm and soothing and then Elain realised that he was sending it to her. Tilting her head, she wondered how he had worked out how to do that. It must, she figured, be something like the way she had pushed the images he had seen in her vision toward him. Quickly thinking about how much she loved him, Elain pushed that back toward him down the bond before she drew another breath and strode into the Library. 

Helion was sitting in a chair by the window, books piled high on a table before him. The moment he heard her enter the room, he turned her way. The High Lord was the picture of quintessential elegance, draped in his pale linen as he reclined in his chair, one hand propping his chin up as his amber eyes followed her across the room. 

“Elain…” he sat up then, all fluid catlike grace. Elain’s mouth went dry. That grace belonged to a predator, and she had no idea if she was about to be pounced upon. 

“You sent for me.” She said, trying to sound confident and unconcerned. “You wished to discuss something with me.”

“I do.” Elain felt her eyes widen and her cheeks heat, and she knew that she was blushing. Helion apparently noticed too, and he tilted his head in curiosity. “… did I interrupt something?” he asked, those amber eyes flicking over her. Elain watched him lift his chin a little, and she knew that he was scenting the air, breathing her in. She was immensely glad that she had thought to wash and change after she and Lucien had returned to their suite after that morning. 

“N-no…” she said, “I wasn’t doing anything…”

“Were you not?” Those amber eyes appeared to glow, and Elain dropped her gaze quickly. Did he know what she had done on that balcony earlier? She couldn’t tell. “Nevertheless,” Helion went on, “I have asked you here for another reason…” Elain looked back up to see him smile at her. This smile was warm, and she felt something in her stomach ease just a little. “Your book.” He said, “I’ve been told that you are more or less complete. I have spoken with someone who runs one of the largest printing presses in the city.” His smile grew more wide, “It is at your disposal.” He told her, “We will be able to mass produce your book, and then work on distribution across Prythian. Our new trade routes will of course be useful for this as well…”

“Oh…” Elain’s breath caught in her throat. “A printing press…”

“Indeed.” Helion inclined his head. 

“I… thank you.” She stared at him. Elain had been so focused on working on the actual book, that she hadn’t ever really given much thought to what would come after she had finished putting it all together. Rhys had intended for her book to go to all the Courts, that was what the purpose had been. Now that they had all contributed, they would of course be given a copy of the book. But with a printing press, Elain could send hundreds of copies to each Court. They could go into libraries and shops, and anyone who was interested would have the chance to read it. She could feel her smile stretching even more widely and she even thought that tears might be welling in her eyes. “I… can really make so many that they could be sold in shops…?”

“You can do whatever you like with them.” Helion told her, “Any and all resources are yours to use as you wish.”

Without really thinking about what she was doing, Elain took several quick steps forward and threw her arms around Helion’s neck, squeezing him, before her brain caught up with her and she released him and stepped back. Her face was burning now, and she found it hard to look at him. “I… I… I’m sorry.” She murmured, her eyes on his chair, and definitely not his face. “I got excited.”

“Well…” his voice sounded amused. “I do know how … _excitable_ … you can be.”

“Uh…” Elain’s eyes flicked directly up to meet the High Lord’s amber gaze then. He did know, she realised. He knew exactly what she had done on that balcony, and now he was _smiling at her_. Elain twisted her hands together in front of her, her gaze falling once again. She did not know what to do or say now. 

“Why don’t you go and tell Lucien what you want done?” he asked, “How many copies you think you would like, and where you would like them sent. All of those details he will know what to do with. Once you have made your choices, we will begin production.”

“Yes, thank you.” The words were barely breathed out, before Elain nodded and turned before hurrying out of the library and down the halls. She had hardly even been paying attention to where she was going, and she finally looked up, hoping that she wasn’t lost in some part of the palace that she didn’t recognise. Instead, she found herself at the door to suite that she and Lucien shared, and she pushed the door open with relief. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” She muttered, walking in and throwing herself down on one of the couches.


	193. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Three

**Chapter 193**

Elain knelt in the garden, going up on her knees and arching her back to ease the ache she had developed from bending all morning. The sun was high in the sky and really quite warm and, despite the light linen she wore, Elain was sweating. She lifted a hand and wiped the back of it across her forehead, trying not to get dirt all over herself. It had been nearly a week since Nesta had left the Day Court, and Elain had tried to keep herself busy so that she wouldn’t miss her sister too much. She had discovered that she needed to keep her mind busy, and not just fill her time with things, and so she had drawn up a plan to redesign some of the little garden which was attached to the suite she shared with Lucien. 

Elain had spent several days exploring the city outside of the palace, looking for things that she would need to work in the garden, and then she had set herself to the task. Garden beds had been dug up and plants transferred to new parts of the garden. Nothing had been destroyed or killed, just moved to make space for new things. 

For the most part, Lucien had been keen for the mornings as it had meant that he could bring her something to eat and drink and sit outside with her while she worked, which he appeared to enjoy, and it reminded her of their initial time together in the Night Court. He hadn’t been able to join her today, however. Elain’s stomach rumbled as if in sympathy with the thought as she wondered where he had gotten himself off to. 

As Helion had suggested, Elain had spoken to Lucien about the printing press and her book. He had asked her more than a few questions, and then told her that he would speak with Helion’s friend. They were due to visit the printing press that afternoon, but Elain supposed that she would need Lucien to return from wherever he had gotten to first. 

Rhys had organised for Amren to edit the book and, as he had already compensated her for this favour, Elain felt that it wouldn’t be polite to change the plan now. She knew quite a few people who would have been able to do the job, but figured that Amren would be better anyway. No doubt the price Rhys had had to pay would have been steep. 

When Elain’s stomach rumbled, she bit her lip, and pressed a dirty hand into her abdomen. She was no real judge of these things, but she figured that by the height and intensity of the sun that it had to be well on its way to midday, and she turned her eyes back on her work. She had wanted to get all of the tiny bulbs she had collected planted into the ground before that evening. “There we go…” she murmured, smoothing dirt over them all. Elain wasn’t sure what would and wouldn’t grow in the Day Court, but she was willing to give any of it a try. 

Satisfied that she had done a fine job for the say, Elain pushed herself to her feet and headed inside. She had just stripped and taken a quick bath to rid herself of the dirt when she heard the door to their suite open, and footsteps make their way across the room. Pulling a dress on to make herself decent, Elain stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes catching on vibrant ruby hair. “Lucien…”

He turned toward her, his face brightening in a smile. “Petal.” He strode toward her then, one hand coming up to her cheek before he pressed a chaste kiss to her lips.

“You’re back.” She said, her eyes moving over him and catching on the paper box in his hands. Lucien set it down on the table and flipped the lid. Gasping a little, Elain allowed herself to drink in the delicious smelling and even more delicious looking pastries. “Oh…”

“I take it this was exactly what you had been hoping for.”

“You do know me well…”

“I am sorry that it took me so long and that I wasn’t able to get back in time to help you out in the garden…”

“That’s alright…” Elain moved toward him and then wrapped an arm around Lucien’s shoulders as she pulled herself up to press a kiss to his cheek.

“I’m considering telling Helion that I begin the day later so that he lets us rest.”

“Oh…” Elain grinned at him, “I don’t know that’s the case.” She thought about the way that they had both fought against getting up that morning, and she blushed at the memory of the way Lucien’s hands had skimmed over her skin. “I think he might be able to smell the lie.”

Lucien bent and pressed another kiss to her lips. “Let him try.”

Elain grinned and looked back to the pastries in the box. “These are going to be so delicious.” Lucien sank down on the chair and Elain followed him, already scooping a pastry out and into her hands. She had bitten it before she had even settled against the couch. “Mmmm…” She didn’t miss Lucien’s amused look as he watched her while selecting his own pastry. Elain’s entire attention was then focused upon the food in her hand as her stomach continued to rumble. She really had been hungry, and this was exactly what she had needed. Around mouthfuls, she tried to question her mate. “How did you know I was hungry?” She asked, “Was it through the bond?”

“No.” he told her, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he focused on her, pastry halfway to his mouth. “I just knew that you would have put yourself out in that garden all morning and not bothered with getting yourself anything to eat.” She grinned at him, knowing that he was entirely accurate and that had been precisely what she had done. 

“Thank you.” She reached her free hand out to brush against his arm. “Lovely mate.”

“Eat up.” He told her, smiling back at her. “This afternoon, we are expected at the printing press. We will be shown the process for producing copies of your book, and you’ll get to make a few choices. Type of cover, any special editions… do you want the same for every Court, for example?”

“Oh…” Elain chewed her pastry, her mind suddenly racing. “I hadn’t considered that…” She looked at Lucien who took a bite of his own pastry. “Do you think I should have special editions…?”

“I don’t know, Petal.” He replied, having swallowed his mouthful. “The idea was unity across Prythian…”

“Yes, but it’s also meant to be special… something the High Lords have all contributed to.”

“You’re right…”

“Perhaps… Elain began, nibbling at the corner of her pastry as her mind went over various options in her head, “I might make a range of special editions… and those are for the High Lords…” She blinked as she tried to picture such a cover. “It might be a little more ornate than the standard edition, but they will each be gifted to a High Lord and they will all be the same…”

“I think that’s a lovely idea, Petal.” Lucien’s approval reached her down the bond just as he spoke the words aloud, and Elain smiled warmly at him.


	194. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Four

**Chapter 194**

It had taken a few days to get everything at the Printing Press organised. Elain and made her decisions, and answered the questions of anyone working there who needed to know the answer to this or that, and then she had been free to leave the process up to those whose business it was. They were simply waiting for Amren’s edited version of the book to be returned to Elain, who would go over it once more to check that everything was to her liking, and then the whole thing was to go to print. 

She was both excited and nervous. During the course of putting the book together, Elain kind of thought that she had lost sight of the fact that others would be reading the book. It had become something she had done just for herself. If she were being honest, she might have completely forgotten that she had been writing it for anyone else. Each new Court she and Lucien had done to, she had found whatever flowers appealed to her, and she had gotten joy from trying to draw them, making notes on each. It had been a way to explore the exciting new places, a way to spend time with Lucien, and she hadn’t really thought much beyond that in a while. She hoped that someone else would enjoy what she had put together. 

It seemed strange to Elain that strangers would be reading what she had written, but also strangely thrilling. It felt almost as if she would be able to teach others about the beauty of the Courts she had seen, about the flowers which grew there. How bizarre, she thought, it was to be able to speak to so many people she may never actually lay eyes upon, and have them hear her words. 

Eyeing the books on her nightstand, Elain wondered what it might be like to write other kinds of books, and have people read them. She had always enjoyed stories, she figured. What if she tried to write one? The idea filled Elain with excitement, and she felt a questioning tug down the bond. Lucien must have picked up on that excitement, and he wanted to know what had gotten her riled up. She sent him a brief flicker of reassurance, before reaching across to grab a blank notebook and something to write with. 

Settling herself back against the pillows on her bed, and her headboard, Elain chewed her lip. What would she write about? Should it be an adventure? A mystery? A romance? What would the broader message be? What did she want to say to her audience? She wasn’t sure, but she knew there should be something. 

When Lucien sent her another questioning feeling, Elain bit her lip, picturing her mate in her mind. Perhaps it should be a romance…

“Hmm…” She murmured, remembering the way that Lucien had very much enjoyed reading that book that Nesta had leant her out loud. If Elain were to write something similar, she would just bet that her mate would be all too thrilled to read it… “Hmm…” biting her lower lip, Elain tapped the pencil against her chin. Lucien, she was certain, would very much enjoy reading something like that, especially if Elain had written it.

Smoothing the notepad, even though it was brand new and unused, Elain tried to think. She didn’t think she would begin with a huge epic tale, but rather just a simple scene. It seemed the best way to try and gauge if she even had any talent for this type of thing. She also suspected that she didn’t have all that much time before Lucien returned to the suite and she wouldn’t be able to continue without him reading over her shoulder. She didn’t want to show him what she was writing, at least not until she was complete and he could have it all in a single go.

Casting her eyes around the room, Elain thought about everything that she and her mate had done in here. Her eyes caught on the kitchen table, and she remembered the way that he had bent her over that. She had spoken to him on several occasions about unleashing himself, and not allowing others to dictate to him who he was, and who he ought to be. Perhaps something of that nature.

Looking down at her blank paper, Elain let out a sigh and began to write.

_She panted when his hands took hold of her shoulders, sliding down to her wrists, and then he had turned her, spinning her around until her back was pressed to his firm chest. He gave her only a moment to adjust to this new position, with him at her back, and then his hands had moved back up to her shoulders and he had bent her over the kitchen bench. She let out a wanton moan, letting him know that she was enjoying this, and that she was keen for more from him._

_“Are you ready?” he asked her, and she could feel him pressed up against her, long and hot. Nodding she looked over her shoulder, wanting to see his eyes as he looked at her, wanting to see just how much he desired her._

_“Yes…” she breathed, seeing that desire burning hot and bright within him, and the sight of it tightened something within her. He didn’t reply, but rather slid his hands down her back and up the outside of her thighs, taking the skirts of her dress with them. She let her head fall forward, her eyes closing as she adjusted her stance, moving her feet wider apart as he pressed up against her once more. When he had bunched her dress up over her hips, she felt him adjusting himself, heard him kick his pants away, and she opened her eyes. Bracing herself against her forearms, she bit her lip when his hands slid down between her thighs, and he pressed a finger into her. “Mmm…” trying to steady herself, she bit down harder on her lip, wanting to be ready for what came next as he pulled that finger out of her._

_“Already drenched…” his lips were at her ear as he bent over her, and she nodded. She had been since his hands had first taken hold of her. She wanted him, so very much._

_“Yes…” she panted, her eyes half closing, as she tried to force herself to breath, “Yes… please…”_

_Again, he didn’t reply. She wasn’t too concerned about that however, as his hands went to her hips, his hold almost bruising, as he swiftly positioned himself correctly, and then slid purposefully inside of her. Squeezing her eyes shut, she gripped the bench tightly in her hands, widening her stance even more for him, wanting to give him space to really move, and th-”_

Elain snapped her notebook shut when the door opened and Lucien strolled in, one hand in his hair, and looking entirely unconcerned, and unaware of the fact that her eyes followed him as he moved across the room. 

“Petal…” he greeted, noticing her watching him a moment later. 

“Hello…” She surreptitiously slid the notebook under the covers, crossing her legs in an attempt to look as if she had simply been lounging casually. 

“What have you been up to?” he asked, and she saw him tilt his head, his chin lifting slightly. With a jolt, she realised that he was scenting the air, and an instant later, she realised that she had worked herself into a bit of a state, and that Lucien could smell her arousal. 

“N-nothing much…” she breathed, crossing her legs even more firmly. The smirk that he gave her told her that he didn’t believe her, but she tried to keep her face neutral all the same. He had no cause to realise that she had been writing smut. 

“Nothing, you say?” he moved toward the bed, and Elain recognised that same feline grace that Helion possessed. “ _Nothing_ sure smells delicious…”

“Does it?” she asked, her eyes unable to leave his. Elain saw no problem with Lucien thinking that she had been touching herself, if that was the conclusion he had come to. The look he was giving her suggested that he did indeed think something of that sort and, when he knelt on the bed, still moving toward her, Elain rather thought that she would let him touch her instead.


	195. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Five

**Chapter 195**

Lucien yawned, and then noticed that his father was watching him. “What?” he asked, narrowing his eyes when he noticed that Helion looked rather amused. “What is that look for?”

“Oh…” The High Lord of the Day Court smiled at him, and Lucien tilted his head, trying to read that expression. “A little tired are you…?”

“That’s generally what yawning signifies.” Lucien muttered, his eyes still narrowed when Helion looked even more amused.

“Elain looked a little tired at breakfast also…”

“Did she?”

Helion smiled at him, and Lucien resisted the urge to push his chair back from the table. He focused his gaze upon the map of Prythian before them, and bit the inside of his cheek. Were they going to do this? Was Helion deliberately going to shift the conversation away from the legitimately important discussion they had been having about trade routes in order to discuss why Lucien was yawning before the midday meal? He looked back up at his father a moment later, leaning back in his chair and lifting his chin slightly. Helion actually gave a small laugh and Lucien narrowed his eyes again. 

“I have to admit,” The High Lord said, “When you first arrived, I hadn’t picked Elain as someone so…” He paused, as if searching for the word he wanted, and Lucien just watched him, “… lascivious.” 

“Ah…” Lucien tilted his head. “Are you usually a good judge of character?”

“Unquestioningly.” Helion’s teeth flashed brightly at him, and Lucien tilted his head again. “But she’s… surprising. Isn’t she?”

“Every day.” Lucien agreed, pleasure and pride moving through him at the thought of all the ways with which his mate continued to surprise him. 

“I had thought her more reserved.” Helion said, his amber eyes bright, “Sweet and shy…”

“She is that, too.” Lucien said, unable to help smiling himself. “Gentle and caring…” he bit his lip before going on, “and over the last few months, I’ve seen her grow more confident, become comfortable in asserting herself…”

“That must be immensely satisfying.” 

“Yes.”

“You did not know her before the bond, did you?”

Lucien eyed the High Lord for a moment, “No.” he replied, “It happened the moment we first looked into each other’s eyes.”

“Interesting.”

“You think so?”

There was clear thought behind Helion’s amber eyes then, and Lucien watched his father nod. “Yes…” the older male murmured, “Because you know one another so very well. There is love beyond the bond…” The High Lord smiled again, “Those whose bond is instant like your own often do not have that kind of relationship.”

Lucien nodded, he’d heard as much. “I didn’t want to force it on her.” He said softly, “I… I only wanted the chance to spend time with her…”

“And she fell in love with you.”

“And I with her.”

“Of course.” Helion leaned back in his chair then, looking the picture of elegance. “Tell me,” his father said quietly, “what it was about her that you fell in love with.”

Lucien crossed one leg over the other, his eyes on the High Lord. He’d been about to ask why he wanted to know when he took in the expression on his father’s face and he remembered that Helion had been excited for him to remain here so that they could get to know one another. There was genuine interest in him and it sparked something within Lucien, loosening him up just a little bit. “Her gentle heart.” He replied. “I’ve never met someone as genuine and kind and peaceful as Elain.” Unable to help a smile, Lucien lifted a hand to run through his hair, “Spending time with her when we were first getting to know one another made me feel… refreshed.” He watched Helion’s face as the High Lord listened, “I liked being with her, listening to her talk about her gardens and what she was reading… and she listened to me. She would ask me things, and was so curious about Prythian. She looks at the world with such wonder… and her excitement is contagious.”

“That makes sense being newly Made.”

“Yes…” Lucien combed his fingers through his hair again. “The bond began to show her things.” He said, “From my past… horrible things.” He was unable to help his fingers touching the bottom of the scar down the left side of his face, “But it didn’t make her turn away from me…” he looked at Helion again, “She has such a soft heart, capable of great compassion…”

“As do you, I’m told.”

Lucien didn’t need to ask to know that his mother had been the one to tell Helion that. “Not like Elain does.” He replied, “She is the most gentle hearted person I’ve met.”

“It seems you are a fine match.” Helion smiled then, “I hear that she walked into he Autumn Court when Eris held you prisoner, and demanded that you be returned to her.”

Lucien gave a low chuckle, remembering the way Elain had stalked into the hall, Tamlin with her. He also remembered his fear that she would make any kind of bargain with Eris. “She did…”

“Was she in love with you by that point?”

“Yes.” Lucien said easily. 

“How do you know?”

“Well…” Lucien tilted his head, “she walked into the Autumn Court and told Eris what she wanted… I had left her with Tamlin in the Spring Court so that she would be safe…”

“A risk.” Helion agreed, “And had you… been together… ?”

Lucien’s eyes narrowed again as he looked at Helion, but after a moment he decided that his father wasn’t trying to be crude or improper, but was genuinely trying to understand their relationship at that point. Nodding, Lucien kept his eyes on the High Lord’s face. “The day before…” Helion raised an eyebrow at that.

“And she had been engaged to a human male…”

“Mmm.” Lucien’s teeth clenched at the thought of Graysen. “She hadn’t… they’d not…” he shook his head, “That human is a piece of work.” He forced himself to draw one deep breath after another, unbidden images of the last time they had seen Graysen flashing before his eyes. His heart raced as he recalled the way the human male had snarled at Elain before grabbing her and forcing her down against that table. He wished that he had been able to singe the bastard just a little, but Elain had gotten between them and dragged Lucien from the room. Relaxing a little, Lucien realised that that night had proved delightful after all, because once they had gotten upstairs Elain had told him that she was his. “I’m so thankful that he never go to touch her. That she never had to endure him…” Lucien ran a hand over his face, “I cannot even imagine what he would have done to her.”

“She has only been with you?”

“Yes.” Lucien slanted a glance at his father who was nodding slowly. “It has been so good…” he smiled, despite himself, “getting to see her grow in confidence, learning what she likes and what she wants…” he felt his face heat slightly at having admitted that out loud. The High Lord just nodded again, his eyes distant.

“It must be nice…” Helion murmured so very softly that Lucien had to strain to hear him. “Not having to picture your mate with anyone else.”


	196. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Six

**Chapter 196**

Watching Lucien from across the room, Elain chewed on her lower lip. He had been quiet since returning from his meeting with Helion, and when she had tried to read him through the bond, she had gotten nothing but confusion. Her eyes moved over him as he reclined on the couch, his feet up on a cushion, and that thoughtful expression that she so loved clear on his face. As she watched, Lucien lifted a hand and ran it though his ruby hair, combing tangles free as his eyes remained unfocused upon the ceiling. 

Glancing down at her notebook, Elain closed it and set it aside. She then looked back to Lucien before swinging her legs around and over the edge of the bed as she got to her feet. “What are you thinking about, Love?” she asked, moving across the room and toward her mate. 

Lucien just shook his head, and Elain sank down on the couch, resting against the edge as she looked down at him. His eyes, both russet and gold, flicked to meet hers and she remained silent for a moment. “Do you think she’s his mate?” he asked, and a trickle of hope reached Elain down the bond.

“…who are we talking about?” she asked.

“My mother.” He bit his lip as Elain looked at his face, “Do you think that she and Helion are mates?”

“Do you?” Elain asked, tilting her head, and wondering where this idea had come from. Perhaps Helion had said something during their meeting that suggested it. Lucien looked thoughtful for several more moments, before he sat up slightly, his hand running through his hair again. 

“I don’t know.” He said, “Can you imagine if they were…”

“It would explain you.” She replied, her eyes on his face as she smiled. “Is the purpose of it to create the most powerful offspring? You’re clearly the product of two powerful fae… it would stand to reason they might be…”

“If they are, I have no idea how they have managed not being together for so long…” Lucien’s hand found Elain’s knee and she smiled at him. “I can hardly stand being away for you for half the day.” He went on, “To think that they would have been longing for one another, the bond pushing them to seek one another out for so very long…” 

“Yes…” Elain frowned. 

“It must have been torture.” He said, “Not being able to be together.” His hand moved up Elain’s thigh, “I couldn’t have done it.”

Reaching out, Elain ran a finger across Lucien’s cheekbone and then down his throat. “I think you could have.” She said, “You were gone for months… and even when you came back, you resisted what the bond wanted. You listened to me…”

“That was only a fraction of the time that they have resisted…”

“Yes…” Elain mused, “But you did not have the fate of entire Courts depending upon your decision…”

“No…” Lucien agreed, “I had my fate with you depending on it…” He smiled at her, “Worth even more to me…” Elain leaned into him, brushing her lips across his cheek. “But you’re right,” he said, “As High Lord, I imagine Helion would have done everything he could to avoid war with the Autumn Court.”

“Even denying the call of the bond and his own mate?”

Lucien nodded. “I’d say so…”

“Then, what you’re telling me is that…” Elain kissed his cheek again, her lips then moving to his ear, “… your ridiculous level of self-control runs in your blood.” He chuckled then, and she felt one of his arms snake around her waist.

“It must, Petal.”

Elain shifted herself until she was in Lucien’s lap. “Did Helion tell you?” 

“He said something about picturing his mate with another…” Lucien’s voice was dark, and Elain closed her eyes. She knew that feeling all too well. The bond had seen to that. It had shown her Lucien’s first love and her death, and it had also literally shown him fucking someone else, even if it had been during Calanmai and he hadn’t had a choice. His hands moved across her back, settling at her waist, and she knew that he had realised what she was thinking. “I’m sorry, Petal.” He breathed, lips at her throat. “I’m sorry that you had to…” he sighed, his lips gentle against her skin, “I’m so thankful that I don’t have to see anything like that…”

“Oh?” she asked, “Would that be the limit for all that self-control?”

“Perhaps.” He murmured, and Elain noticed his hands become more possessive.

“Do you think you would ask your mother?” she asked, him, “Ask her if Helion is her mate…”

“I might.” He replied, “But… do you think that would hurt her? What if she’s trying to recover…? What if asking her brings it all up and prevents her moving on and dealing with it?”

“I would think,” Elain murmured, leaning into Lucien and resting her head against his shoulder as he held her, “that being free to speak about Helion, after all this time, would be welcome…”

She felt Lucien thinking about that, and Elain lifted a hand to his hair. She combed her fingers through its ruby lengths, enjoying just that simple touch between them, and the easiness with which touches like this came now. She also felt so very sorry for Ashk if Helion was her mate and she had been unable to be this way with him. 

“I have to do something about it.” Lucien breathed, and Elain nodded her head against him. “If they are mates…” he went on, “they deserve to be with one another.”

“That’s true.”

Elain curled against Lucien, her eyes closed. She focused on her breathing when his hands slid up her back, caressing her skin as they trailed up her back and across her shoulders. “And what have you been doing while I was gone?” he asked, “You looked to be writing when I returned.”

“Oh…” She thought about the smutty story she had been writing and she blushed, thankful that Lucien wasn’t able to see her. “Nothing ground-breaking.” She replied, not prepared to lie to him and claim it was a letter to Nesta or something else like that. 

“You did look remarkably into it when I walked in…”

“Did I?” Elain would have supposed that she would have. She had just gotten to the bit where the hero of the story had finally managed to get the heroine alone, and they had snuck into a vacant room in the manor in which they had been staying. “As into you as I am now?” she lifted her head to look him in the eyes, and she watched his own eyes move over her face. Lucien’s metallic eye clicked and whirred as he took in her expression, and she felt her heartbeat quicken when his hands tightened on her.

“I would wager that I could make you a little more into this…”

“Oh, I don’t know about that.” Elain grinned, pressing a soft kiss to Lucien’s nose. “You’re already my absolute favourite thing in the world.” She felt the impact those words had on her mate, and she knew that Lucien’s heart had surged, feeling it down the bond, as well as hearing it in her head. Even if she’d had neither of these, however, his expression would have given it away. 

“You are my world.” He replied, voice thick, and Elain smiled more widely.


	197. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Seven

**Chapter 197**

She could hardly believe it. Looking at the book in her hands, Elain turned it over and over in awe. She heard Lucien’s soft chuckle from beside her, felt one of his hands glide across her back as he moved closer, and she turned the book over again. 

“Look pretty good, doesn’t it?” he asked, and Elain nodded silently. 

“I… it’s hard to believe it’s mine…” she murmured, “That this…” she ran her fingers over the glossy cover, “this… is what I was scrawling and scribbling in that little book you gave me…”

Lucien pressed a kiss to her temple, and Elain smiled at the book in her hands. “Is it to your liking, Petal?”

“Oh, yes…” she grinned, her eyes moving over the golden vines and flowers across the cover and down the spine of the book. “I love it. It’s perfect.”

“Alright…” Lucien’s hand rubbed her back again, “We will produce and distribute…” he moved away from her then, presumably to go and deliver that message. 

“Okay…” Elain breathed, her eyes still on the book. It was more perfect than she would have dared to imagine. It would look at home on Rhys’ fancy bookshelves with all of his other books. She could hardly believe that she had done this. Elain would not have believed, two years ago, that she would have written a book and had it properly published and distributed to anyone at all let alone across every Court in Prythian. She felt a wide smile spreading across her face, stretching so far that it almost hurt. She liked this. She could do this again. 

Tucking the book close against her chest, Elain thought. She had enjoyed writing her little stories and scenes over the last week or so. She didn’t think that she was entirely terrible at it, either. Granted, she had yet to show anyone else anything that she had written but, to her own eye, it seemed alright. She had scribbled down several ideas she had for longer stories, and she rather thought that she had begun to come up with a decent enough outline to try to work on something more substantial. She grinned again, deciding that this was something she could do. This would be something productive, something to contribute to the world. 

When Lucien returned to her, he smiled at her, his eyes looking her over and taking in the way she held the book to her chest, and the look on her face. “Pleased with yourself, Petal?”

“Yes.” She replied, and he smiled more brightly.

“Good.” He said, “You should be.” He stepped closer and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her in against himself, and Elain leaned into him, resting her head against his shoulder. “I’m proud of you.” He murmured into her hair, and she felt her pulse quicken in response to those words. “Perfect mate. Accomplished published author.” 

“Oh…” Elain gave a soft laugh then, and nodded, her head still resting against Lucien’s shoulder. “I am, aren’t I?”

“You certainly are.”

“I want to write more.” She murmured, and felt him look down at her. 

“More books like this?”

“No,” She tilted her head up to meet his gaze. “Novels…”

“Oh?” surprise and pleasure crossed Lucien’s features then and he nodded his head. “I think you would be rather good at that as well.”

“Do you?” she tightened her arm around his waist. 

“Yes.” He answered, nodding solemnly. “Do you have any ideas yet?”

“Some…” She told him. “I… I’ve been writing some short stories here and there for the last little while.”

“I would be interested in reading those, Petal…” she saw Lucien tilt his head, looking at her then. She felt his excitement mixed with a little pride and she felt the same thing flare within her. “What kinds of stories have you written?”

She knew that she was blushing, and she knew when Lucien noticed. “Ahh…”

“Oh, I see…” he smiled widely at her, “Now I am even more excited to read them…”

“I’m sure you are.”

“Would you allow me?”

“I suppose so.” Elain ran a hand over her face, knowing that she was still bright red. Her face felt hot, and she could feel it moving down her throat. 

“I’ll bet they’re very good…” He said, “Knowing how you have been… and how… excitable you can be…”

“Lucien…” she breathed his name, her eyes moving around the room. This was not the kind of conversation that she would have liked to be overheard. Especially by the very people who would be producing her book. “Shh…”

“Oh…” her mate gave a low chuckle and pulled her closer, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Do you know which of the Courts you would like to visit with your book?”

“Well, I did tell Viviane that I would personally bring her a copy when it was ready, and we do need to go back to the Winter Court anyway…” she glanced up at him and his grin told her that he remembered why the needed to return to the Winter Court. “Also Mabon is soon and I did tell your mother that we would visit the Autumn Court.”

“Yes… I recall.” Lucien nodded, his face thoughtful again. Elain could just about see his mind working, thinking about his mother and Helion again. “Nesta and Cassian will be there too, won’t they?”

“Yes.” She looked up at him, “Do you think Feyre and Rhys would as well?”

“I have no idea.” He bit his lip, and Elain watched his face for a few more moments. “… I would like to know.” He added. “Perhaps it could be a big enough celebration that Helion would like to join us.”

“That’s an intriguing idea…” Elain smiled slowly up at him, “So would it be possible, do you think, for us to travel though the Autumn Court for Mabon for a few days and then continue to Winter?”

“I think that sounds plausible.”

Elain nodded, allowing Lucien to link his arm through hers, tucking her in nice and close. “Are you going to ask Helion about it this evening?”

“At dinner?” He asked, leading her toward the door. Elain nodded, matching her stride to her mate’s. She knew that when they were back out on the street that they would be watched. They had been every time they left the immediate palace since she had accepted the bond and word had spread that Helion’s heir was mated. She wasn’t yet used to the attention but, with Lucien’s arm through hers, she was not really concerned. Let them watch if they liked, she loved people looking at him and knowing that he was hers. 

“The more time he has to think about it the better?”

“Perhaps.” He replied, “Or, the more time he has to think about it, the more he would question and second guess and have time to change his mind and overthink and then find a way out of it…”

“There is that, I suppose.” Elain murmured, smiling at the first group of faeries who wandered past them, eyes following their movement out into the street.

Lucien held her close, a smile on his own face. Elain glanced at him, noting how he had seemed to grow more confident in his now public role as Helion’s heir. He truly did look as if he belonged here, and anyone who looked at him could see that. Elain trailed her fingers down his arm, holding him firmly. She was so very proud of her mate, and she pushed that feeling directly down the bond to him. He needed to know that.


	198. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Eight

**Chapter 198**

Walking along the path beneath the orange trees, Lucien felt himself relax. Despite not living in the Autumn Court for so many years, some part of him still felt as if this place were home. As leaves every shade of flame fluttered down around them, Lucien turned his eyes toward the canopy. He reached for Elain, finding her hand without so much as needing to glance her way, and he felt the appreciation that moved though her when she looked up at the leaves as he had. 

“Wow…” She murmured, and Lucien smiled, pleased that she could see the beauty here as he did. It pleased something deep within him that she could have this reaction to the place in which he grew up.

“I used to love walking this road.” He told her, and she squeezed his hand gently. Lucien’s heart quickened at the gesture.

“I can see why.” She leaned against his side, “It is absolutely stunning.”

Lucien nodded his agreement, casting a glance down at Elain as she matched his stride. His eyes went back to the trees then, and he allowed himself a deep breath, drawing in all those familiar Autumn scents. These trees, these sounds, these smells all used to bring him relief, relaxation, even joy, when he would sneak out here to hide from his brothers as they had looked all over for him. This had been one of Lucien’s refuges, and it sparked those same feelings in him now. When Elain moved closer, Lucien wrapped an arm around her shoulders, tucking her in against his side. 

“Do you think Eris knows we are here?” Elain asked, and Lucien nodded again. 

“Certainly.” Helion’s voice was deep, and Lucien glanced around at his father. He and Elain had both convinced Helion to accompany them to the Mabon celebrations in the Autumn Court. The High Lord had agreed to come as a balm to strengthen ties to other Courts, preparing for the Trade Routes and the roles they must all play. Lucien knew that it was also to see Ashk. Helion hadn’t admitted as such, and Lucien doubted that his father ever would admit such a thing, that did not mean that it wasn’t obvious, however. Elain had thought the same thing, Lucien considered, another glance going his mate’s way. She had seen right through Helion’s claims about friendship and trade routes. 

When they had discussed Helion’s choice later in their suite, Elain had asked the question that had solidified Lucien’s suspicion. If Helion only cared about the trade routes, then why didn’t he schedule a meeting with Eris and the other High Lords, why hadn’t this been dealt with as yet another thing to do. Not that he truly minded. He had been learning quite a deal about the inner workings of the Day Court, and he supposed that might be another reason he was keen to visit Autumn. It was familiar and he knew his role. Even with things different with Eris on the throne, Lucien knew what was expected of him. Eris did hold a more formal court than many others, though. Perhaps, Lucien figured, this was why it was so easy to work out one’s place in this Court. Follow the rules.

*

One emotion after the next hit Elain down the bond from Lucien from the moment they left the Day Court. She could feel him go from nervous excitement, to just flat nervousness, the apprehension came next, then the fear, quickly replaced by familiarity and enjoyment. She could still feel that a part of him thought of this as his home, and she knew that he must feel immense relief that he could finally return here without risking his life.

“Once,” she said, leaning into him and pressing her cheek to his shoulder, “You promised to show me things here…”

“I recall.” He said, his russet and golden eyes looking down at her. “I am pleased that I will be able to do so.” Elain looked up at him, wanting him to go on and, after a moment, he did. “There are a few places around the house and in the surrounding forests. I used to go and hide there every so often, either from my brothers, or just to have some time to myself if I grew tired of the library.”

“I would like to see them.” She turned her head to press her lips to his shoulder. 

“Lucien?” this was the High Lord of the Day Court’s voice, and Elain saw Lucien turn his head toward his father over his shoulder before the older male finished his question. “You’ve clearly been to the Mabon celebrations before. What is to be expected?”

Glancing up at Lucien for the answer, Elain listened carefully. She had done some brief reading about the traditional Mabon celebrations, but she was interested to know what Lucien thought if it all. 

“Nothing all that elaborate.” Lucien said, his tone light and casual. He lifted an arm and slung it around Elain’s shoulders, tucking her into his side as they walked. “There are large tables prepared with the food and fruits of the harvest. Apples, grapes and the like. Whatever grows in abundance in the Autumn Court. These feast tables can be visited by anyone. There’s feasting and dancing… often the younglings perform with the maypole… the sense of anticipation grows as everyone awaits nightfall and the fires are lit. It is the time to give thanks to the mother. During the night she will unite with her lover and fall pregnant with the harvest for the year… It is a time to give thanks for all that she has provided us with.”

“Does the High Lord…” Elain began softly, “Like… Calanmai?” She hated that images of Lucien and Ianthe flashed through her mind. Lucien tightened his grip on her. 

“Yes.” He said, “But … it is the female’s choice here.”

“Oh?” Elain’s eyes widened as she looked up at him. That was different.

“This is about the Mother…”

“That…” Elain smiled.

“The magic goes to them… they take it into them… it is a fertility rite.” He slanted a glance at her, “Why do you think my mother had seven sons…?”

“Oh…” 

“What happens then?” Helion asked, and Elain did not miss the rough tone to his voice as he redirected their conversation. 

“The couples all disappear off into the trees… to perform their rites. They generally spend the night out there, returning in the morning with the light of the new day.”

“Does everyone who attends generally finish the night in the woods with…” She didn’t know how to finish that question, but Lucien shook his head. 

“It is an open ritual.” Lucien replied, his voice still light and casual, “Families bring their younglings… there’s feasting for all. Those from the poorer farming communities even make the trip to the Forest House for the chance to feed their families from the tables. It’s actually quite pleasant.” He smiled down at her, “Typically they leave before the couples begin venturing off into the trees…”

Elain nodded, thinking about that. She wondered, with a smirk on her face, just what Nesta and Cassian would make of the traditional Mabon celebrations and if they even knew what was involved.


	199. Chapter One Hundred and Ninety-Nine

**Chapter 199**

The long hall looked much the same as it always had, but Lucien hadn’t really been expecting anything different. Eris may have had different ideals to Beron, and valued different things, but he had the same sort of aesthetic, and Lucien hadn’t really pictured his other brother as someone who would have paid too much attention to the decoration of the place. Having thought that, Lucien did notice that the atmosphere felt different. Standing before Eris on his throne, Lucien cast his eye around the room. It may all look the same, but when Beron had been the High Lord, there had been a feeling of apprehension and anxiety in this room whenever it was as full as it was currently. He could feel none of that now, though. The mood of the room was gentle anticipation. Tomorrow was Mabon, and Lucien could feel the excitement in the air.

“Autumn welcomes the Day Court.” Eris said, and Lucien would have put money on the fact that his brother’s smile was genuine. He watched Eris’ amber eyes move over them, from Helion to himself, and then on to Elain. Lucien watched as his brother’s gaze lingered on his mate. “Your sister is already here.” Eris told her.

“… Nesta?” Elain asked, her voice curious, and Eris nodded his acknowledgement. “Oh, good. Thank you.”

“She is currently taking a walk with my mother.” 

“Oh…” Lucien saw Elain turn her head to the doors leading out to the garden, and he slid his hand down her arm to take hold of her hand. He gave it a light squeeze, able to feel how much she wanted to run off outside and see if she could find Nesta. He hadn’t forgotten how Elain had cried when her sister had left the Day Court, and he could feel how much she wanted to see her now.

“Would you like to join them?” Eris had obviously noticed her desire as well, and Elain glanced at Lucien before nodding. 

“I would…”

Eris made an elegant gesture that clearly meant Elain was free to exit the room, and Lucien watched her hurry off out into the gardens. He tried to quell the rising panic within him, hoping he wouldn’t dwell on the last time she had been without him in the Autumn Court. Nothing would happen to her, he reminded himself. His brothers were gone, and nobody here would have any reason to harm her, not even to get at him. This was different now, and Elain would be safe here. He knew that Eris would do what he could to protect her, he had demonstrated that in the past. Also, Lucien knew, that while Eris ruled differently to Beron and would likely be far more fair and reasonable, it would not be wise to displease him. He found it comforting that his brother so clearly had a fondness for Elain, as that would no doubt offer her some protection around the Court. She would be fine. He kept repeating that to himself over and over, hoping that eventually he would believe it. 

When Helion stepped up beside Lucien, addressing Eris, Lucien made himself pay attention to what was happening around him, and not some possible imaginary threat to Elain. “Is there anything you require of us?” The High Lord of the Day Court asked, “In preparation for your Mabon Celebrations?”

“Not particularly.” Eris smiled again, “It is pleasing enough that you are here; that you have come to share in our revels. I do hope that you enjoy the festivities.” Lucien would have sworn that he’d seen a flicker of amusement cross his brother’s features as those amber eyes had settled on Helion, his gaze piercing.

“I thank you.” Helion inclined his head, before lifting his face once more to Eris. “I would also like to extend the invitation to you. You are more than welcome to join us in the Day Court for our Beltane festivities.”

“I shall keep that in mind.”

It wasn’t all that much later when Eris had Helion and Lucien shown to their rooms, and Lucien was more than a little keen to get his dirty travel clothing off and slip into a hot bath. He had then dressed, and lounged around his room while waiting for Elain. He hadn’t supposed that her walk with Ashk and Nesta would have taken as long as it apparently was, and he began to worry. What if something had happened to her after all.

Having just resigned himself to go looking for her, Lucien turned the handle of the door to their room, pulling the door open. He then let out a startled shriek, stepping back from the door when Elain stumbled through. 

“Oh, hi.” She smiled, and he could feel the happiness and contentedness washing over her and he smiled even more widely. 

“Petal…” He opened his arms when she slid closer to him, going up on her toes and wrapping her arms around his neck. “Did you enjoy seeing Nesta?”

“Yes.” Lucien could feel the truth of that down the bond. “And you were right… Cassian is here.”

“That was to be expected…”

“How did you go with Helion and Eris?” Elain’s arms tightened even further around Lucien’s neck and he felt her lips graze his throat. 

“No surprises there.” He replied, “Pleasant obligatory words…”

“Usually your job…” she murmured, and Lucien was unable to help his eyes sliding closed when Elain’s tongue traced over the part of his throat she had just kissed. 

“True…” he groaned just a little, and felt her smile as he heard her gentle chuckle. “What has brought this on?” he asked, one of his hands making their way up his mate’s back and into her hair. She kissed his throat once more, and Lucien could feel her grasping at his coat as she pushed even closer to him. 

“Nothing in particular.” She breathed, “Perhaps I am just inspired by the coming Mabon celebrations… one can feel the excitement in the air.”

“That’s also true.” He murmured, “There is always a sense of anticipation.”

“I do like that…” Elain’s lips were at Lucien’s ear now, and he was unable to help himself from bending and lifting her to himself. Her slim legs went immediately around his waist, and both of his hands went to her hips, holding her gently as she lifted her head to kiss him properly. Lucien sought to deepen the kiss right away, his tongue sweeping her mouth thoroughly. The small moan he earned from Elain sent tingles throughout his body, and he knew that everything he was about to do would be worth it. 

Elain’s hands slid across his shoulders and up into his hair. He felt her pull the small leather tie from the end of his plait, and she carded her fingers through the rest of his hair, pulling it free and loose. “Lucien…” she breathed, and he hummed his response to the question. “I don’t want to wait for Mabon.” She went on, lifting her head to meet his gaze. “Please…”

“We don’t have to wait for Mabon.” He replied, one hand sliding up under the skirts of her dress, caressing her thigh. “There’s no rule that says we do.”

“I know that…” she replied, “Just if you had any ideas that we might…” she grinned at him, “Anticipation, and all…” He grinned back at her, understanding then. “I want you now.”

“As you wish, Petal.” Lucien carried her across the room before bending to place her carefully on the bed. He would give her exactly what she asked for, and he always would.


	200. Chapter Two Hundred

**Chapter 200**

The anticipation grew steadily throughout the day. Elain had felt the atmosphere within the Autumn Court positively buzzing, right from when she and Lucien had entered the dining room for breakfast. The fae of the Autumn Court had murmured among themselves, sneaking furtive glances at one another, and the very air had been thick with excitement. 

Nesta and Cassian had already been at breakfast when Elain had approached the table, and her sister had smiled at her when she had taken up a seat. “Do you have plans for the day?” Nesta’s voice was soft, and Elain flicked a glance at her sister. 

“No, not yet.” She replied, “I was going to see if Ashk was going to suggest anything.”

“Do you think there’s a pre-evening tradition?”

“There might be.” Elain said, “Maybe even something she would need help with to prepare for the night…”

“That’s true.” Nesta’s pale eyes moved past Elain, and Elain turned to look. The Lady of the Autumn Court was striding into the room, and heading for the table. 

“Good morning.” Ashk’s bright smile was as warm and sweet as the honeyed pear that Elain had just taken a bite from. As the red-headed faerie took a seat, Elain smiled at her. 

“We were just wondering,” she began softly, “if there is anything that you require help with preparing for this evening.”

“Oh, not at all.” Ashk said, “Everything has been taken care of.” Elain watched that warm smile widen slightly, as her russet eyes flicked from Nesta to Elain and then to Lucien. “You are all free to spend the day as you wish.” 

Tilting her head, Elain flicked a glance at Lucien beside her. Her mate was already looking at her, and she met his eyes, both russet and gold. She heard that metallic eye click and whir as he looked back at her, clearly weighing his options, before she turned her eyes back on Nesta. 

“I wouldn’t mind having a look around the Court.” Nesta said, “Elain has told me that the Autumn Court is very beautiful, and the flowers she included in her book so highlight this fact.”

“Yes…” Ashk smiled at Nesta, “You saw some of it yesterday, but I am sure that you would enjoy what is outside of the House as well.”

“You are welcome to come with us.” Lucien put in and Elain’s eyes went to him quickly, “I have several places to show Elain and we would be happy for you to join us.”

“Thank you.” Nesta nodded quickly, and Elain could feel Lucien’s surprise and pleasure down the bond. She knew that he had wanted to improve his relationship with Nesta, because it was important to her. It did truly make her happy that Nesta seemed to have become more open to Lucien, and she would very much love it if the two of them would get on. 

“I’m just going to assume that invitation was open to me as well.” Cassian’s voice was low, but the wide smile across his face was bright. 

“Obviously.” Lucien replied, and Elain could hear the smirk in his voice without having to look at his face. “I wouldn’t dream of trying to exclude you.” Nesta’s pale eyes flicked from Lucien to Cassian and then back again, and Elain bit back a chuckle when her sister’s eyes narrowed.

“Good, because it wouldn’t work.”

“No, I can imagine you stalking us down through the trees. Sitting up in the branches like a giant bat…” 

“Uh…” Cassian’s eyebrows lifted so high Elain thought they might have been in danger of disappearing into his hair. 

“Hanging upside down…” Lucien went on, and Nesta actually laughed. 

Cassian turned his eyes on Nesta, an incredulous look on his face. “You can’t think he’s funny…”

“I can think whatever I like.” She replied, although Elain could hear the good humour in her voice instead of icy poison. Cassian shook his head and reached into he centre of the table, taking another serving of honeyed pears. 

“I don’t hang upside down in trees…” he muttered, eyes shifting from Nesta to Lucien. “At least not when I’m observing people…”

“So just when you sleep then?” Lucien asked mildly, and Elain could see his eyes on Nesta when he asked that question. She knew then that this was entirely for her sister’s benefit. 

“What do you think my feet are?” Cassian asked, “You’ve seen them… how would I even grip the branches?”

“I must confess…” Lucien snickered, “I haven’t actually paid all that much attention to your feet, Cassian. They could be talons for all I know.”

“They aren’t.”

Watching Cassian’s exaggerated reactions to everything Lucien said, Elain realised that his responses were for Nesta’s benefit as well. Both males were attempting to amuse her elder sister, and she found it entirely endearing. Reaching for Lucien’s knee beneath the table, she smiled at him when his eyes flicked her way a moment later. The return smile she received indicated that he was aware she had figured out what he was doing, and Elain turned her attention then back to the honeyed pear on her plate. 

When Helion entered the room, the first thing Elain noticed was the increased chatter around the table from the female fae, and the way that Ashk seemed to sit a little straighter in her chair. The Lady of the Autumn Court seemed to absently brush her titian hair back over her shoulder, but now it fell in a most elegant manner, and Elain doubted that the action had been done absently at all. Ashk’s russet eyes remained firmly focused upon the plate before her as she tilted her head in an elegant and demure manner, glancing up only when the High Lord of the Day Court approached the table and came to a stop opposite her. 

Lucien’s heartrate was increasing with every passing second, and Elain reached for his hand then beneath the table. She found it and squeezed gently, letting him know that she could feel his reaction. 

“Good morning.” Helion’s dark rich voice reverberated throughout the dining room, and Elain could do nothing but watch the way in which Ashk lifted her eyes to his and gave him a breathtaking smile. 

“And to you, Helion.”

It did not escape Elain’s notice that The Lady of the Autumn Court had not used Helion’s title. She supposed that she probably rarely did, but perhaps not in public like this. Much of the Court would be able to overhear, and this was an official visit. Elain wondered if she would have used a title if Eris had been present.

Helion took up a seat at the table, practically just across from Ashk, his amber eyes sweeping the table as he took in the various food on display for breakfast. “This all looks interesting.” He said, and Elain smiled at him. 

“I recommend the honeyed pears.” She said, and he lifted an eyebrow by way of acknowledgement. 

“Oh, thank you.”

“They were my favourites growing up.” Lucien put in, and Helion actually turned his head to look over Elain at Lucien.

“Well, now I am intrigued.” He said, taking multiple helpings and piling it all on his plate. Elain smiled at the rush of delight that reached her down the bond from Lucien then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 200 Chapters in 200 days.   
> I'm a little pleased with myself.   
> Drop me a review to let me know what you're thinking if you haven't already done so. xx


	201. Chapter Two Hundred and One

**Chapter 201**

The drums could be heard all the way inside. Elain first noticed them when she came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and looked at the dress that she had chosen for the evening. The burnt orange velvet suited the trees outside her window perfectly, and she knew that it would be very appropriate when outside under those trees by the fires. Listening to the echoing beat which was summoning all the fae down to the feast, Elain slipped the dress over her head and began fastening the laces down the front. 

As she moved toward the mirror, sitting down at the vanity and picking up her comb, Elain listened to Lucien’s heartbeat. He was still in the bathroom, and she smiled when she realised that his heart had begun to beat in time with the drums she could still hear from outside. A moment later she realised that her heart had begun to beat to match his. She could feel the pull of the drums, feel the tug in her blood. She needed to get outside and go down there. 

“Petal?” Lucien came out of the bathroom and Elain turned to look at him. He was fastening his pants, tucking his linen shirt in as he looked at her. “Can you feel it?” he asked, and Elain noticed the fire in his russet eye. He was alight. 

“Yes.” She replied, her own voice gentle. “I can feel it.” Lucien was looking at her with such heat that Elain found it extremely difficult to turn back around to face the mirror and begin pulling the comb through her hair. She focused intently on the task at hand, braiding the hair up off of her neck and into a crown atop her head. Only when she had secured it firmly did she chance a look at Lucien in the mirror. He was now standing by the bed, pulling a coat of claret velvet on, and she smiled as she turned in her seat to watch him. “That coat makes you look extremely dashing.” 

“Does it, my love?” his eyes, both russet and gold, shifted her way, and he gave her a lazy arrogant smile that heated Elain’s blood.

“Very much.” Elain set her comb aside and got to her feet. She watched as her mate’s eyes moved over her and an appreciative gleam appeared in that russet eye. 

“You look magical.”

“I…” she took a few steps toward Lucien, stopping herself when she realised that if they intended to actually leave the room, she would have to keep her hands off of him. “We should go…” she breathed, and Lucien nodded. 

“I very much need you out by the fire…” He swept toward her then, his large, warm hand wrapping around one of Elain’s as he led her to the door.

“Lucien…” As they strode the hallways of the Forest House, Elain began to think “When was the last Mabon celebration you went to?”

“The year before I left, I suppose…”

“And… have you participated?” she asked, “In the Mabon Rite?”

“Yes.” His eyes flicked her way and Elain met them silently. “It was nothing like Calanmai and Ianthe.” He added after several moments in which Elain had said nothing. 

“Was it Jesminda?”

“…No.” Lucien shook his head, “I… I was young.” He murmured, squeezing her hand, “The High Lord’s son… and … excited to be allowed to participate, and even more excited to be chosen by a beautiful female…”

“Did you know her?”

“No more than by sight around the Court sometimes…”

“Is she still here?” Jealousy flashed through Elain and she swallowed it quickly. 

“I don’t believe so…” As they exited the last door, coming out into the cool air, Lucien wrapped his arm around Elain’s shoulders and tugged her into himself. Elain allowed him to pull her close, and she smiled when his lips found her cheek. “The only female I want tonight is you.” He told her, and her heart beat enthusiastically in her chest in response. 

“Only tonight?” she asked, teasing. 

“Tonight and for all of eternity.” He replied. Elain looked up at him and went up on her toes to press her lips to his jaw. She felt his happiness an instant before the drums seemed to increase in intensity, and Elain’s heartbeat soared to match them. 

Lucien led Elain through the mass of faeries and toward the banquet tables on the other side of several bonfires which had already been lit. Fae were milling all around the place, small plates and cups in their hands as the sun began to set and twilight seemed to fill the trees. Elain couldn’t help but notice the majesty of the place. Leaves every colour of red, orange and gold seemed to fall around them, and she was sure she could hear tiny bells sound as they did so. She could feel Lucien’s adoration of this place, and she watched her mate carefully. Several leaves fluttered down around them, and Elain reached up to pluck a yellow leaf from Lucien’s vibrant hair. 

“I am glad you are here with me.” He told her, and she nodded, her eyes on his face. She could feel the truth of those words as she met Lucien’s gaze even hotter now that they had come out here. 

“I am too, love.” Elain smiled and then allowed her eyes to move around. “What does one do at a Mabon festivity?” she asked, smiling at little when Lucien’s eyes seemed to widen momentarily. 

Lucien’s hand on her was comforting as he took her up and down the feast table. Elain selected a fig to eat as she watched the faeries slowly trickle out of the house and down to surround the several bonfires. The drums only grew louder, summoning all who could hear them, and then they would mingle with one another offering greetings and chatter. “Feasting…” Lucien told her, “And when the sun sinks and it grows more dark, there is dancing by the firelight…”

“Have you seen Nesta and Cassian yet?” She asked, craning to see over and around nearby fae. This proved almost impossible though, as they were all much taller than she was, and there were far too many. This was going to be a crowded event, Elain could feel it already. 

“Not yet, Petal.”

“…what about your mother?” she ventured, glancing up at his face quickly to gauge that reaction. Lucien merely shook his head, his eyes sweeping the area. Elain could hear his golden eye clicking and whirring as he surveyed the space around them, and then his arm wrapped around his waist and he slipped the both of them into the moving crowd. “What are you doing?” she asked, unable to help the laugh in her voice as she wrapped her arms around Lucien’s shoulders. 

She didn’t need to have asked, however, as when she noticed her own heartbeat once again in synch with his and with the powerful drums now reverberating around them, Elain knew exactly what he was doing. Fae moved around them, seemingly in time with the heavy beat of those drums, and Elain allowed herself to move with the flow of it all. She and Lucien seemed to be as one, swaying and stepping in time to the beat which seemed to encompass all the world. This was Mabon, Elain thought.


	202. Chapter Two Hundred and Two

**Chapter 202**

Nothing had felt as good as holding Elain in his arms while the Mabon drums beat in quick rhythm with his heart. Lucien gazed down at his mate, acutely aware of the fact that the last time he had been here, moving to this beat, he would not have even considered that he would ever have someone like her for his mate. As if sensing his thoughts, and perhaps she did, Elain’s dark eyes lifted to meet his, and she smiled at him. Lucien’s gaze dropped to her pretty lips, and he felt his breath catch in his throat. He didn’t have to fight how much he wanted her, how much he wanted to bend and kiss her; not now that she was his mate, and not now when they were surrendering to the Mabon drums. 

Bending to her, Lucien felt one of Elain’s hands slide up his back and across his shoulders. His lips had only just lightly brushed hers when Cassian was suddenly beside them, and Lucien lifted his head with a growl.

“Yes?” he asked, seeing the Illyrian just looking at them and ignoring the many dancing bodies pressing in on them from all sides.

“Have you seen Nesta yet?”

“I can’t say that we have.” Lucien tried to leash his temper, aware that he wanted to rip apart the next person to get between himself and his mate. Forcing that instinct down, he just looked at Cassian who was continuing to watch them. “She wasn’t here when we arrived…”

“I’m sure she will appear…” Elain put in, and Lucien tried to leash the wave of disappointment when he felt her hand fall from his shoulder. He wanted her hands on him.   
Cassian tilted his head, and Lucien would have sworn that he saw the Illyrian pout for just a moment. “You’re right…”

“The evening is just beginning…” Lucien resisted a smirk, “You have plenty of time to find her…” He wondered then if Nesta and Cassian would be sneaking away into the trees when all the other couples began to disappear. He knew that he would certainly be taking Elain off to a comfortable spot that he knew of. Did Nesta and Cassian have that kind of relationship yet? Lucien wasn’t sure, but he figured that he would ask Elain as soon as Cassian retreated from them. 

When Cassian didn’t move for several moments, Lucien sent an uncertain glance toward Elain who raised an eyebrow at him and then turned her eyes on Cassian. “Would you like us to help you look for her?”

Lucien just about died, and he couldn’t help a small flush of resentment for the Illyrian. The last thing he wanted was to have to let Elain go so that they could spend precious time searching for Nesta. Elain’s elder sister was probably hiding somewhere Cassian wouldn’t be able to find her. 

“Six eyes are better than two.” Cassian replied, relief clear on his face, and Lucien resisted rolling his eyes. 

*

Sliding one of her hands down to take hold of Lucien’s, Elain smiled at Cassian. “If she’s not out here already, she will be shortly.” She said, her eyes shifting up to look at her mate then. She could feel his disappointment, and also the anger, coming from him. She could tell he was trying to leash the desire within him to rip Cassian apart for interrupting the two of them, and she dearly hoped that he was able to control that desire, because she was sure that Cassian would win whatever scrap he and Lucien got into. Elain did not want her mate dead.   
As golden leaves continued to fall gently around them, Elain tucked her arm in against Lucien’s and smiled up at him. “Care to check the feast table with me, love?” she asked, and he inclined his head. 

“Of course, Petal.” The hand that came to rest on Elain’s lower back was possessive, and she smiled up at him a little wider, letting him know that she enjoyed his touch. He kept her close to himself as they made their way toward the closest table, and Elain couldn’t help letting her eyes roam over everything lay out for them to eat. She had already perused the options the last time that she and Lucien had walked the table, but she still couldn’t seem to look away from the offerings. It was going to make it much harder to locate Nesta if she couldn’t take her eyes off of the honeyed pears. Elain made a face, and tried to correct herself, but before long she had fallen into the bad habit once again. 

“Where do you think she could be?” Elain asked, leaning her head against Lucien and lifting her eyes to the trees above them in the hope that she wouldn’t look at the table.

“Probably hiding from Cassian.” 

Looking up at Lucien, she raised an eyebrow. “You think so?”

“No.” Lucien gave her a slow smile in return. “She’s probably on her way down, trying to fight the pull within herself. You felt it…” he bent to press a kiss to Elain’s forehead, “She would as well… and it seems like she would want to fight anything that meant she was out of control.”

Nodding, Elain figured that Lucien was exactly correct. Nesta hated being told what to do, there was no way that she would just obey something like that. She could all too easily see her sister sitting crosse legged with her arms folded and her jaw set as she determinedly ignored the beating of the drums. “Could be…”

“She won’t be able to fight if after sundown.”

"Oh?” Elain tilted her head, enjoying Lucien’s fingers moving up and down her wrist, “Why?”

“It gets stronger.” Lucien replied, “The females absorb some of the magic, and they choose a male to take…”

“So she will be out here soon enough anyway.”

“That would be my bet.”

Elain stopped walking then and turned to look up at Lucien. She lifted a hand, brushing his ruby hair back from his face before going up on her toes to press her lips to his. She could still hear the slight bell-like tinkling around them as leaves fell, still feel the quick beat of the drums as her heart raced to match. “I’m glad I haven’t had to go looking for you among all of this.”

“Oh, Petal.” Lucien winked at her, a lazy arrogant smirk spreading across his face, “I have absolutely no intention of releasing you.” His fingers continued to move up and down her arm, over her skin, and Elain couldn’t help a pleasured shiver from moving through her.

“Good.” She breathed, her own hand touching Lucien’s cheek, her fingertips tracing his scar from brow to jaw. Something made her look up then, her eyes sliding from Lucien to the crowd, sweeping back and forth until she found pale eyes. “Ness…” she murmured, holding that blue-grey gaze. 

“Oh…” Lucien turned, and Elain could tell it took him a second of his eyes moving over the crowd before he found Nesta too. “Oh…”

Nesta looked resplendent. She was wearing a long crimson dress that Elain would never have been able to imagine her sister in before that exact moment. “Cassian has found her…” She said, watching as the Illyrian cut a straight line through the dancing crowd and directly for Nesta. 

“Didn’t need our help after all.” Lucien said, and Elain leaned into him when his arms snaked around her waist once more.


	203. Chapter Two Hundred and Three

**Chapter 203**

Watching as Cassian strode through the crowd to Nesta, Elain squeezed Lucien’s hand. She was pleased that her sister had come out to be with them all, and she couldn’t help watching the way that Nesta’s hands continued to smooth over the red dress she wore, as if not quite comfortable. Lucien’s other arm snaked around Elain’s waist and she leaned back into him when he brought his lips down to her ear. 

“Are Nesta and Cassian…?” he left the words unspoken, but Elain knew what he meant. They hadn’t been sleeping with one another the last time Elain had spoken to her sister about it, but that had been when they’d been in the Day Court. It was possible that things had changed since then. “That dress…” Lucien murmured. “It’s certainly a statement, but I’m just not sure what she’s saying…”

Looking her sister over, Elain nodded her head in agreement. It was a very sexy dress. “I… I’m not sure if they are.” She replied, “But I will go and find out…” Stepping away from Lucien, Elain felt his reluctance to let her hand go, and she smiled at him over her shoulder. “I will return, love…”

“I know.” He gave her a small smile and released her hand. Elain turned then and strode across to Nesta, reaching her moments after Cassian had. 

“Ness…” she said, “Do you think we might speak…?” The incredulous look Cassian gave her did not escape Elain’s notice, and she shot him a fleeting apologetic look in return. She didn’t intend to sneak Nesta away so that he wouldn’t be able to find her again. Elain intended to quickly ask her sister about her relationship with the Illyrian, and then bring her right back.

“Of course…” Nesta’s face turned serious and those blue-grey eyes flickered back and forth across Elain’s own face quickly. Elain took her sister’s hand and drew her toward one of the feast tables. “What is the matter?” Nesta’s voice was hard. “Has something happened? Are you hurt?”

“No, no. I am more than fine.” Elain said, picking a piece of fig up from the table and popping it into her mouth. She glanced up again to find Nesta’s eyes moving over her, assessing. Swallowing, Elain cleared her throat a moment later. “I just wanted to ask you something.”

“… What?” Nesta pressed when Elain was silent for several moments. 

“… That’s a pretty dress.” Elain bit the inside of her cheek, trying to come up with a delicate way of asking her sister what she wanted to know. 

“Thank you.” Nesta’s response was steady, and devoid of any kind of emotion. Elain nodded, watching some more red and golden leaves flutter down around them as a soft breeze blew through the branches overhead. Lifting her hand, Elain swept a few from the edge of the table, watching as they fell to the soft earth beneath. Not knowing how else to ask, Elain cleared her throat again, deciding to just do it. 

“Are you sleeping with Cassian?”

Nesta’s eyebrow lifted so quickly, Elain thought it was as if her sister had been shocked by lightening. “No.”

“Oh… Okay…” Nodding, Elain’s eyes moved over the crimson dress Nesta wore once again. “I was kind of wondering, because that dress…” Suddenly, she looked up at Nesta’s face, her eyes locking onto those blue-grey eyes. “Are you planning to do it tonight?” Nesta’s hesitation then told Elain everything she needed to know. “You want to use the Mabon Rite…”

“Ashk told me that the females are the ones during Mabon that make the decision and have the control…” Nesta’s voice was so low that Elain had to strain to hear her. “I want the first time I do this to be on my terms. I want to have control…”

“And you’re going to choose Cassian?”

“Yes.”

Elain knew that her mouth had dropped open, but she couldn’t do anything about it. She just stared at Nesta, not knowing what to say. It made perfect sense to her now, why Nesta had agreed to come to the Autumn Court for Mabon after Ashk had spoken to her. It made perfect sense that Nesta would want to remain in control, especially during her first experience of something like this. “… the dress makes sense.” She eventually murmured, searching for literally anything to say. “… Uhm… do you have somewhere in mind?” Elain asked.

“My room.” Nesta said, “I… do not wish to run off into the trees to have some hurried encounter against a tree or in the dirt.”

Elain’s lip twitched, but she didn’t tell her sister that she rather liked the idea of an encounter against a tree. She would have to remember to mention that to Lucien later. “No, that seems reasonable to me.” Elain nodded, “You should be comfortable, and if you want to go back inside and up to your room, then you should.”

“Yes.”

“…Does Cassian know?” Elain asked, “That you intend to choose him for tonight?”

“I had hoped the dress would make that obvious.” Nesta said, “I… have been trying to hint at it…”

“Something tells me that you need to be explicit with Cassian.”

“You’re likely right.”

Elain nodded again, her eyes sweeping the crowd until she found the Illyrian standing where they had left him, his eyes still on Nesta. She did not think that her sister would have any trouble letting Cassian know her plan or in getting him to agree to it. “Did Ashk intentionally give you this idea?” She asked, “Or did you come up with it on your own after hearing about Mabon?”

“It was my idea…”

“Of course it was.” Elain didn’t know why she had asked that question. “Have you seen Ashk this evening?”

“I have…” Nesta inclined her head and made an elegant gesture across to the next bonfire. “She was over that way when I first arrived.”

“Was Helion with her?” Elain’s eyes swept the crowd again, but with so much red hair out there, it was nearly impossible to be sure if she had seen Lucien’s mother or not.

“Not that I had noticed.” Nesta’s hands were moving over the dress again. “When does all of this happen?”

“You’re meant to feast first.” Elain said, “Then dance… and then people will slowly disappear with their partners…”

“Okay.” Nesta turned toward the table, and began selecting several things to eat. “Will you be participating later?” she asked, “With Lucien?”

“Of course.” She watched as Nesta turned her head to look at her, even as her sister continued to select food to add to her plate. 

“… and will you be returning to the house or heading into the forest?”

“Well…” surprised by that question, Elain tried to think, “We haven’t discussed that, but I do think that there was somewhere that Lucien wished to show me and this may be his opportunity to do so.”

When Nesta had sufficiently filled her plate, her sister turned to look at her properly. “If I do not see you again this evening,” Nesta’s voice was more gentle than Elain had expected, “I will see you in the morning.”

“Alright.” Elain agreed, “We will probably have much to discuss…”


	204. Chapter Two Hundred and Four

**Chapter 204**

When Nesta returned to Cassian with her plate of food, Elain went back to where she had left Lucien. He was standing where he had been, and she was pleased to see that no random female, feeling the Mabon drums, had approached him in trying to persuade him to participate in the rite with her. He smiled when she strode toward him, and Elain went up on her toes to fling her arms around his neck. Pressed firmly against him then, Elain could feel Lucien’s heartbeat while able to hear it in her mind. It was quick, and still in time to the drums. 

“What did you find out?” he asked, and Elain lay her head against his shoulder, allowing Lucien to move them to the beat of those drums. 

“They haven’t had sex yet.” She told him, pressing her lips to his throat. “But Nesta wants to choose him tonight…”

Lucien was silent for a moment, and Elain knew that he was thinking that piece of information through. “That makes sense.” He eventually said, one of his hands moving down Elain’s back, “She’s had so many choices taken from her, it makes perfect sense that she would want control over this…”

“Yes, I think that’s part of it.” Elain replied, wrapping her arms around Lucien’s waist now so that she could lean more comfortably into him. “I think she would have always wanted to have control over this, though.”

“Yeah, I can see that being true.”

“She did tell me that she saw your mother by that fire over there…” Elain made a vague gesture at the nearby fire, and felt Lucien turn a little to try and look that way. “Do you want to see if you can find her?”

“Maybe…” there was a smile in Lucien’s voice and Elain lifted her head to try and see his face. He pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose then, smiling more widely at her. “Do you mind?” he asked, “It shouldn’t take long…”

“I don’t mind…” she replied, allowing a smile of her own as she met his eyes. She could see the fire alight within, and knew that he was still very much feeling the pull of those drums, just as she was. “As long as you’re ready when I need to drag you out of here.”

“Oh, Petal.” He grinned, giving her a wink, “I will forever be ready for you.”

“We’ll see.” Elain stepped back from him, just enough to allow him to move, but she kept hold of one of his hands. “Let’s find your mother.”

“Alright…” Lucien allowed Elain to pull him through the crowd in the direction of the fire. As she walked, she looked back over her shoulder at him, seeing his eyes still on her, and she smiled again. 

“Nesta said she wanted to take Cassian back up to her room inside the house…”

“Fair enough.” Lucien replied, raising his eyebrows at her when Elain smiled more widely at him. “You don’t think so?”

“Well, she said she didn’t fancy a hurried encounter up against a tree…”

Lucien’s eyes moved back and forth across Elain’s face, and she could hear his metallic eye clicking and whirring. She saw the moment he cottoned on to what she was hinting at and his mouth opened silently. Nodding, his lips twitched in a small grin. “Ah.”

“So just keep that in mind for later.” Elain turned back around to watch where she was going. 

“Part of it at least.” She heard Lucien say, “I do not intend to be hurried…”

“Uhh…” Elain bit her lip when liquid heat pooled between her thighs, her blood still pumping through her body matching its rhythm to those drums. “Of course you don’t.” she murmured, but she knew that Lucien had heard her because she felt his reaction to her words down the bond. 

They reached the fire a moment later, and Elain paused to let her eyes sweep the crowd. Lucien came to stand beside her, hand still in hers, as he did the same. They needn’t have bothered though, as at that moment Eris appeared, and a hush fell over those gathered around the fires and the feast tables. 

Slowly, the drums slowed and softened although, Elain noted, they didn’t stop entirely. Her heart, and Lucien’s as she could hear in her head, continued to keep time with the beat. Eris raised his hands and the only sounds aside from those drums that anyone could hear were the soft tinkling bells as leaves continued to fall around them and the strangely quiet sounds of the woods. Everything seemed strangely muted, as soft footfalls on sodden leafy earth. Watching the High Lord of the Autumn Court, Elain could feel the anticipation building in the air. Something was about to happen and she had no idea what it was. 

When Eris began to speak, Lucien shifted closer to Elain, slipping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her gently to himself. She knew, without having to probe too deeply, that he was attempting to claim her, and she wondered why considering it was meant to be the females who chose their partners for the evening. Glancing around them then, however, she saw that many of the males present in the crowd had crept closer to whichever female they were evidently hoping to catch the eye of, and she knew that Lucien hadn’t wanted anyone even looking her way. It wouldn’t have mattered to her though, because she would never have any intention of choosing anyone other than her mate. Nearly everyone here would know they were mated, too, so she doubted anyone would be dumb enough to try and come between them. As Eris continued to speak, Elain glanced around again for Nesta. She wasn’t publicly mated, and Elain wondered if anyone would have risked getting closer to her despite Cassian who would have, no doubt, been standing right beside her. 

Unable to see her sister or the Illyrian, Elain returned her attention to Eris who seemed to be wrapping up his introduction to the evening. She watched as the High Lord made an elegant gesture, and then Ashk stepped up beside him. If Elain thought that Lucien’s eyes had been alight before, she never would have been able to imagine what she saw in Ashk’s russet eyes. The Lady of the Autumn Court seemed to be practically glowing with fire and heat, and Elain knew instantly that this was the power of Mabon. All of that magic had seemed to have flowed into Ashk and it burned within her now. As Eris went on about the Lady choosing a mate for the evening, Ashk moved forward, beginning a slow stroll through the crowd, and Elain watched with fascination as every female that the redheaded faerie passed seemed to take some of that glow into herself. When Ashk drew closer to them, Elain could feel that heat, and as the Lady passed her, that heat flooded Elain and she felt an aching throb flare to life within her. Lucien’s hands tightened on her, and she had to resist turning in his arms and jumping him then and there. 

Managing to control herself, Elain forced her eyes to follow Ashk, watching as the Lady came to a stop before a tall male who seemed to shine with a light of his own. Helion. 

Lucien’s grip on Elain tightened again, and they both watched as Ashk took Helion’s hand before turning and walking off into the forest with him. Almost instantly, all sound returned. The drums were beating as loudly and enthusiastically as before, and Elain’s heart raced to keep pace with them. Turning, she looked up at Lucien, pleased when she saw her own desires reflected back at her in his eyes.


	205. Chapter Two Hundred and Five

**Chapter 205**

Lucien’s hands on Elain were as hot as the blood pumping through her veins. Every step she took sent waves of scorching desire through her and, with his breath hot at the back of her neck, she could hardly stand forcing herself to keep going. They walked through the thick trees of the forest, stepping lightly on the sodden and leafy earth, and they could still hear the drums even here. The scent of decaying leaves was thick and, as the drum beat pounded through Elain’s blood, she found it more and more intoxicating. Gold and crimson leaves flittered down around them as they moved and, when Elain came to a large tree blocking their path, she stopped and turned to face Lucien. His hands came up to her face instantly, and then he was kissing her. Elain leaned into him, responding passionately. She had just lifted her own hands, wanting to touch him when Lucien stepped back. Before she could do anything further, or even ask him what was wrong, he had taken her wrist and moved around the large tree.

“Come on…” he said, grinning at her over his shoulder, “It’s not far…”

Allowing him to lead her through the trees, Elain ran her eyes over Lucien’s fine form. Her mate was exceptionally attractive, she knew, and she decided that she really ought to spend more time just looking at him and appreciating that fact. “Mmm…” not realising that she’d made an actual audible sound, Elain was surprised when Lucien gave a low laugh. 

“See something you like, Petal?”

“Well, I do.” She replied, her eyes moving over him again, coming to rest on his tight pants. “Very much so.”

She followed him for several minutes, and gradually the sounds of the other couples venturing into the trees disappeared. Elain knew that she and Lucien had gone deeper than any of the others, and this pleased her because while she rather liked the idea of Lucien having her against a tree, she wasn’t as keen on the idea of just anyone happening upon them at any moment. 

When Lucien came to a stop, Elain found her hands on him in an instant. He’d backed up several steps when she pressed forward, but then he’d held his ground, his own large hands lifting her grip her firmly by her waist. Elain allowed him to pull her to himself, and she couldn’t help but pay particular attention to how delicious it felt to have her body pressed up against his toned frame. He felt warm and solid, and Elain could feel her blood pumping enthusiastically throughout her entire body as her heart raced to match the drums. Lucien’s heart matched hers and when he lifted one of his hands to her cheek, tilting her face up to him a moment before he bent to kiss her, Elain felt heat pool between her thighs once more. 

Parting her lips for Lucien, Elain let out a gentle groan, her hands tightening on handfuls of his shirt as she attempted to pull him closer. When his tongue swept her mouth, Elain groaned again. She could hear Lucien’s heartbeat loudly in her head, feel her own pulsing to match, and heat swirled around her entire body, driving need to every cell in her body, and she found herself pulling at him again. 

Lucien moved forward, shifting Elain back until she felt herself pressed firmly against the smooth trunk of a tree. Grinning into the kiss, she brought one of her own hands up, skimming Lucien’s shoulder and up the back of his neck and into his hair. Her fingers slid into his silky tresses as he began to lick teasingly at her. 

“Lucien…” she murmured as he broke the kiss and began dragging his lips across her jaw and down her throat. 

“Mmm?”

Elain gasped, both of her hands now clutching at Lucien’s shoulders when his hot mouth attached to her throat, and both of their hearts beat in her head, in sync to the drums which she would have sworn had gotten louder. The sound was everywhere, in her mind, she could feel it in her body with every breath she took. “Can you hear it?” she asked, nails scratching at him. 

“Yes…” his tongue licked at her skin, and Elain groaned. 

Opening her eyes, Elain tilted her head back to rest against the smooth bark of the tree. She watched as multicoloured leaves fell about them, coming to rest on the yellow and golden and crimson forest floor. The smell of the sodden earth filled her lungs, and desire coursed through her. Before she could even say anything, however, Lucien’s hands slid down her body. She felt him press another kiss to her throat when those hands went even lower, gathering the skirts of her orange dress before he began dragging it up her thighs. 

“Mmm…” Elain pulled Lucien’s jacket from his shoulders and released it to fall to the leavy earth beneath them. 

“Is this what you want, my love?”

“You know it is.” Elain’s words were breathy as she couldn’t manage any further strength behind them, “You can feel it as much as I can…” she meant the drums, and the power pushing her to grip Lucien as tightly as she could. “I know you can feel it through me…”

“Yes.” He replied, pressing himself to her again, and pinning her to the tree. “I can feel it.” His lips brushed her cheek, “Can you feel me?”

“Yes.” One of her hands slid up under Lucien’s shirt as his own hands went to the laces at the front of her dress and he began pulling them open. His skin felt hot to the touch and Elain couldn’t resist dragging her nails carefully over it. He shuddered beneath her touch and she smiled up at him, lifting one of her legs to hook around his waist as she slid her other hand down to begin loosening his pants. “I can feel that you want me…” she panted when he pushed himself against her once more. Elain moved her hand carefully over him, enjoying the fact that he was already so very hard. “You want me like I want you…” In the dark so far from the fire and with the trees shielding them from the night sky, Elain was able to see the faint glow still coming from within her. Ashk had seemingly distributed some of the Mabon magic she had taken into herself, and it evidently remained within Elain, and she knew it would until after she and Lucien had finished out here. “I want you…”

“As you wish, Petal.” Lucien’s words were breathed against Elain’s ear as both of his hands gripped her hips tightly, lifting her into a better position an instant before she felt him push into her. 

“Aaah…” Tilting her head back against the tree again, Elain’s eyes closed and she bit her lip. She couldn’t help her hips shifting in position, trying to move, but Lucien’s firm grip held her in place as he withdrew and then thrust again. “Aa-mmm…” Her hands clutched at him, gripping him as tightly as he held her, and she groaned again when his hot mouth worked its way down her throat, his tongue licking at her between hard thrusts between her thighs. “Lucien…” gasping his name, Elain wrapped her arms around her mate’s neck, and he evidently knew what she wanted. Lucien lifted her from the ground then, allowing her to hook both of her legs around his waist. 

“Uh…” He groaned then, his lips at her ear once more, and the sound went straight between Elain’s legs. Trying to move on him, she found herself pinned firmly to the tree, and she could do nothing but gasp as Lucien settled into a quick rhythm, each thrust matching the beat from the drums echoing all around them, punctuated every now and again with a gasp from Elain or one of Lucien’s own low growing sounds. 

The magic within Elain swelled and she felt it burning beneath her skin. She could feel it moving through her blood, and she could feel it leeching out of her and through Lucien. Eventually it left him and she felt it return to the forest and the sky. The drums continued to echo around them, and Lucien hadn’t so much as missed a beat in his rhythm. Elain clutched tightly at him, murmuring her encouragement, and listening to his heartbeat in her head, knowing that he was doing the same with hers. This was good, she had decided, even as those soft bells tinkled as leaves continued to float down around them. She wanted to do this out here more often.


	206. Chapter Two Hundred and Six

**Chapter 206**

When she had felt Lucien beginning to tire, his grip on her loosening, Elain told him to put her back on the ground. She had then guided him down onto the soft earth, moving atop him as he settled back against the leaves. She wasn’t through with him yet, and she still wanted him inside of her. Lucien’s eyes followed her in the dark and an instant later, he’d created a little ball of faelight and set it hovering above them. 

“Oh…” Elain braced her hands against his chest as she felt his own hands settle against her lower back, holding and guiding her movements as she began to shift over him. She bit her lip as she met his eyes in the warm light, and she began to move more quickly. She could feel Lucien’s eyes still on her when she lifted her own gaze, allowing herself to look around the place that he had brought them to. She could see it better now with his faelight illuminating the space around them, and it was beautiful. 

“Do you like it?” he asked, and she knew that he’d somehow gleaned what she had been thinking. Elain nodded, maintaining her rhythm. 

“Yeah…” she breathed, her eyes moved over the branches above them, linking together from several trees to create some kind of latticed arch. Crimson leaves continued to fall from it, circling around them, and Elain thought that it all looked precisely what she had always imagined a fae home would look like when she had been mortal. “I like it…” she looked back down at him, her hips still moving quickly and deliberately. “Do you like this?”

“Ah, _fuck_ , Petal…” Lucien’s strong hands gripped her hips tightly, and she let him begin to pull her onto himself, “Fuck, yes…”

Grinning, Elain watched him as she continued to ride him. It wasn’t often that she managed to draw such language out of him like that, and it filled her with all kinds of confidence. With a wicked grin, she ever-so-slowly raked her nails down his chest, her eyes still on his face as she did so. “Ah! Cauldron boil and fry me…” he groaned, his eyes closing as his head tilted back. Elain grinned again and looked back up to the trees as she continued to move on him. 

Her eyes followed the elegant smooth trunks of the large trees as they reached for the sky, and she looked at the way the branches of the trees reached for one another. High above her the branches found one another and they had interlocked, weaving in and out and around one another. It was quite beautiful, and she knew that she wanted to come back here in the daylight to have another look. She could kind of tell what colours the leaves were, but she knew that they would be far more magical with the light of day. Lucien could come with her, she decided, looking back down at him with another smile. She supposed that she would be able to find a use for him once he had accompanied her into the trees. 

“Did you used to come here a lot?” she asked, surprised that her own voice was rather breathless now. He nodded, seemingly unable to open his eyes, and Elain watched the strange expressions work their way across his face. “Does it look even better in the light?”

He did open his eyes to look at her then, his fingers digging into her hips a little. “Y-yeah…” he met her gaze and Elain grinned, “Are you really going to talk to me about trees right now?”

“Well, I…” Elain slowed her movement, holding herself carefully over Lucien. She felt him try to lift his hips to meet her, and she pressed her hands more firmly into his chest, holding him down and in place “I think they’re quite beautiful…” She lowered herself slowly onto him again, biting back a satisfied groan as he filled her once more. “I wish to see them in the daytime…”

“Uh… yes…” Lucien’s hands pulled at her, guiding her hips then, “Yes… tomorrow…” 

“Do you swear?” She asked, and he nodded. Elain knew that focusing on this was the only thing keeping her from losing it entirely. She had wanted to hold off just a little, letting Lucien unravel first, so that he would be ready when she unleashed her own desires. They had been simmering beneath her skin since she had first heard the drums begin earlier that afternoon, and she knew that she was going to be relentless and demanding. Now that Lucien was driven half wild himself, Elain knew that she would be able to lose herself in him. 

When Lucien met her eyes then, Elain knew that he’d read her down the bond. She could feel the answering _Yes_ as he held her gaze and, before she could so much as smile in response, he had pulled her down and rolled her beneath himself. That metallic eye clicked and whirred as Lucien pressed Elain down into the soft earth, his eyes on her face as one of his hands lifted to brush her messy hair back from her face. “I am here for everything you want…” his words were gentle, but they met the fire moving though Elain’s blood and she nodded in response. “All you’ll have to do, Petal,” He told her, “is think it… and I’ll know.”

“O-okay.” She nodded again, her breath catching when Lucien thrust himself between her thighs once again, and her hands clutched at his back. Elain’s nails scratched at his skin as he began a quick rhythm, and her heart beat wildly in her chest. She was surprised then, when Lucien brought one of his large, strong, hands up and he gripped her throat tightly. Her eyes widened as she met his gaze, and liquid heat pooled between her legs. This was exactly what she wanted.

Lucien seemed to understand that and his eyes moved rapidly back and forth as he took in her expression. She felt him brush at her through the bond, and she sent every appreciative emotion she could down it at him. With his hand still at her throat, Lucien held in place with the other as he set about fucking her harder than he had in weeks, and Elain closed her eyes, absolutely loving it. 

_Yes_. She thought, pushing her thoughts toward Lucien, wanting him to know how much she was enjoying this. _Yes, fuck me. Just like this. Harder. Fuck me in the dirt. Take me. I love it. I love this. Do whatever you want to me. I love you in control._

Knowing that he could hear her made Elain just about ache with pleasure. She wanted more. She could feel Lucien’s grip on her tightening, feel him shifting over her. Then, without warning, he had grabbed her and flipped her over onto her stomach beneath him. Elain gasped as her cheek was pressed into the soft earth, and she drew a deep breath of those decaying leaves as Lucien’s hands lifted her hips into a better position for himself, and then he was fucking her again. One of those hands slid up her back and then came back around to grip her by the throat again, and Elain groaned her pleasure as her entire body responded to her mate’s actions. Her fingers dug into the dirt as she jolted again and again with every one of Lucien’s rough thrusts into her body, and she panted as she tried to draw breath. 

_Yes._ She thought, _Yes. More…_

When Lucien brought his other hand up from Elain’s hip to seize a handful of her hair, pulling her head back, she knew that she was reaching her edge. “Yes…” she groaned, wanting him to actually hear her. His rhythm didn’t change in the slightest, and mere seconds later her entire world went white. She wasn’t aware of what she had done with her body, and she hadn’t realised that she had screamed, but she could hear the sound and somehow knew that it was her own voice. Then, there was nothing but that soft earth against her cheek again and the intoxicating scent of decaying leaves.


	207. Chapter Two Hundred and Seven

**Chapter 207**

They had returned to the Forest House after having finished their evening out in the trees, and Elain was thinking longingly of a hot bath and then a soft bed. She had walked back with Lucien, as if in a daze, and she supposed that she probably was in one. Lucien had been quiet too, and Elain slanted look after look at him as they walked. Usually he would have been speaking, but he remained silent, and she wondered if he was thinking about what they had done.

Reaching for him down the bond, Elain frowned as she tried to read the emotion she could feel coming off of him. As he closed the door to their room behind them, her eyes followed him across the room as he headed for the bathroom door. 

“Bath, Petal?” he asked, and Elain nodded, lifting one of her own hands to her cheek where she could still feel the gritty texture of the dirt across her cheek. Dirt was also all up her arms, and caked beneath her fingernails, and she knew that she desperately needed a good scrub.

“That sounds perfect.” She followed her mate into the bathroom, just watching him as he moved about getting the water running and removing his shirt as he waited for the tub to fill. She could feel an array of thoughts swirling within him and when she had pulled her down dress off and let it fall into a pretty circle on the floor, Elain walked toward Lucien. “Here…” When he stood up, having turned the water off, Elain wrapped her arms around him from behind. He froze and she pressed herself more firmly into his back. “Are you aright, my love?” she asked. 

“I am.” He said, voice clipped, “… are you?”

It was then she realised what he had been caught on. “I am perfect.” She told him, loosening her hold on him just enough for him to turn to look down at her. He bent to press his lips to her forehead, and Elain smiled encouragingly up at him. “I feel wonderful.”

“A-alright…” he stepped back into the tub, his hands on Elain, and she moved to follow him, biting back a groan of pleasure at the delightfully hot water. 

“This is gorgeous.” She breathed, sinking down into the water with him. Lucien’s eyes moving over her body in an assessing manner did not escape Elain’s notice and she wrapped herself around him once more. His arms snaked around her ever so gently, and Elain lifted her head enough to press her lips to his jaw, and his throat before taking them to his ear. “Thank you.” She murmured to him, “For what you did out there…” She knew that he preferred to be gentle with her, and that he wasn’t the largest fan of holding her down or at her throat. She knew that he preferred his touches to be soft and loving, and she knew that he had done that entirely because he had known that was what she needed with the Mabon magic moving through her. “I know that is not your favourite…”

“Petal…” Lucien’s response was quieter than she had expected, “I told you I would do whatever you wanted me to.”

“And I thank you for that.” She kissed his throat again, liking the way that his hands froze on her hips from where he had been gently caressing her. “Thank you…”

“I love you.” He breathed, and Elain lifted herself into his lap, her hands moving over him as carefully as she could manage. 

“I know.” She told him, “I can feel that in everything you do and everything you say… in every touch you make on my skin… and every beat of your heart I can hear in my head…” Elain sat back enough to meet Lucien’s eyes. “Can you feel how much I love you?”

Lucien nodded just a little then, and Elain leaned in to press her lips to his in a soft kiss. She heard his heart flutter a little more quickly and she smiled into the kiss, before leaning even further into him and resting against him, her chest pressed to his. Breaking the kiss, Elain settled against Lucien, resting her head against his shoulder, and enjoying the way that he had wrapped around her, cradling her as they sat together in the hot water.

By the time they got out of the bath and made their way to their bed, Elain had sorted through most of what she could feel coming from her mate down the bond. He had wanted to give her exactly what she had desired and what he knew that she liked out in the forest, but she could tell that the images of what he had done to her had stuck in his mind. He was afraid that he had hurt her, holding her face-down in the dirt and fucking her so roughly. She had felt a pang of panic from him when he had spotted the fingerprint shaped bruises at her hips as she had climbed out of the tub, and she had tried to quickly hide the similar set on her thighs by grabbing a nearby towel to dry off.

As they had settled in the bed, the covers spread evening across them, Elain slid a little closer to Lucien. She reached out and wrapped an arm around him, half lifting one of her legs over him as she cuddled in nice and close. “Can you feel how much I love you now?” she asked, and he looked down at her, that metallic eye whirring, as he took in her face. 

“Yes.” He replied, and she smiled at him, stretching up to press a kiss to his lips again. 

“What you did out there, I know you did for me.” She breathed, her fingers skimming up and down his arm as she looked up at him, “Let me do the same.”

“The same?”

“Let me show you that I’m not hurt…” she went on, feeling his reaction to those words, the hope behind it, “Let me show you how much I appreciate you…”

“I’m listening…” Warm hands were on her then, caressing her thigh and sliding around to her lower back. That gentle touch was just as effective as what he had done to her earlier, and Elain knew that she was wet within moments. 

“Lucien…” she whispered, and he met her gaze once more. She wanted his memory of this Mabon evening to be pleasing for him, and she didn’t want it to be met with any kind of shame or regret or worry that he had hurt her. She wanted him to enjoy it, and she knew how to go about that. “Let me…” one of her hands slid down beneath the blankets and she found him already stiffening. His soft gasp at her touch made Elain smile, and she watched his face as she began to slowly work him, her touch gentle, yet purposeful. 

Lucien’s breathing had already changed, and Elain smiled more widely at him as she slipped over and into his lap. Everything reaching her down the bond from him now was happy excitement, and blatant desire, and Elain held her mate’s eyes as she positioned him and then sank down onto him, taking him deep within her in one fluid and easy movement.  
“What… what would you prefer?” she asked, her voice softer than she had intended, but Lucien smiled at her all the same. He had also evidently understood her question, because his hands were suddenly at her hips and he lifted her before bringing her back down onto the bed, her head against the pillows as he settled over her. 

“I want to have you.” He murmured, lips against hers and he pressed kiss after soft kiss to her lips, “Exactly the way that I desire…”

“I’m all yours.” Elain purred, giving a breathy moan then when he began to move so very slowly, yet so very deliberately, inside of her.


	208. Chapter Two Hundred and Eight

**Chapter 208**

Opening his eyes in the morning, Lucien was pleased to find himself still wrapped around Elain, and her own arms still around him. He smiled when he glanced down to see her face pressed firmly against his chest, her eyes still closed to the bright light. He loved seeing her like this, so soft and gentle.

For at least half an hour Lucien lay, enjoying the morning light streaming in through the window and falling across the bed. He liked the way it played with Elain’s skin, highlighting here and there, and Lucien couldn’t help but think that she would look the quintessential Lady of the Day Court part with the gold in her hair illuminating the lighter strands here and there. Elain was beautiful, and Lucien could still hardly believe that she was his mate. How had the Cauldron decided that he was worthy of a female like her?

Unable to help himself, Lucien traced a finger down her soft skin, over her cheekbone as his eyes watched her face, coming to focus on her soft lips. Brushing a fingertip gently across those lips, Lucien remembered the careful way he had kissed her last night when they had curled up in bed together. He had loved the soft way she had moaned beneath him, loved the way she had opened to him, returning every gentle touch he’d given her with tenderness and love. He was so very thankful that she had wanted to do that, wanted to give him those moments after what had happened out in the forest. 

Combing his fingers then through Elain’s hair, Lucien thought about the forest, thought about the way that Elain liked him being rough with her. It was not something he had expected, and he still wasn’t entirely certain how he felt about it. He would do it because she wanted it, and it wasn’t as if he didn’t enjoy it to some degree. He just really didn’t want to hurt her, and he didn’t love the idea of forcing her to do anything she didn’t wish, so he didn’t really like the idea of holding her down in any way. He had seen the bruises he had given her, his fingerprints now purple and black against her perfect skin. Guilt ached within his chest. He had never meant to hurt her. Having her writhe beneath him, calling his name, however? Lucien loved that. 

He also loved being able to look into her eyes as he did that. Holding Elain’s gorgeous brown eyes with his own as he moved carefully inside of her was probably Lucien’s favourite thing ever. He loved being able to watch her face, see every reaction she made to what he was doing to her, feel every response. She was so very expressive, and everything she did told him what he ought to do next, if he was doing something right or if he needed to try something else. Elain’s face was nearly as informative as what he could feel of her through the bond. All of it together, and Lucien knew exactly what he needed to do to have Elain screaming his name. 

She stirred then and opened her eyes. He continued to comb his fingers through her hair, his eyes on her face as he watched her. When she looked up at him, he smiled more widely. “Good morning, Petal.”

“Mmm…” Elain arched her back, stretching, although her arms remained around Lucien. When she settled against him again, he tightened his hold on her, loving that he could feel her heart beating within her chest when it was pressed against his own. 

“How do you feel?” he asked, and shuddered slightly when she pressed her lips to his throat. 

“I feel great.” She breathed, her breath not against his skin. 

“Not… sore?” he asked, picturing the way that he’d pressed her down into the leaves and dirt, fucking her roughly from behind while her hands had slid wide as she’d dug her fingers into the earth. 

“Not sore at all.” He felt her look up then, and a moment later her soft lips brushed against Lucien’s jaw. “I feel… relaxed… and content.” She kissed him again and his own heart quickened in his chest. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Petal.”

“I do.” She murmured, “You did that for me.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Even though it wasn’t what you wanted.”

“I don’t want you to think that I don’t enjoy that…” he breathed, drawing her in even closer and kissing the top of her head. “I like it…”

“You just prefer being gentle.”

“Exactly.” He ran a hand up and down her back. “I just prefer that…”

“Well, I like that too.” She told him, “So, I am alright with that.”

“I know you like it.” He grinned, smirking at her when she pulled back just enough to see his face, “I can tell by the sounds you were making last night.”

“Is that so?” she asked, and Lucien gave her another smirk. 

“It is.”

“What kinds of sounds do I make?” she asked, and Lucien could hear the grin in her voice, even as one of her gentle hands traced up and down his spine. 

“Oh…” Lucien gave a low chuckle and bent to take his lips to Elain’s ear. He pressed a soft kiss to her, before he tightened his hold on her, ensuring that she couldn’t get away, before he opened his mouth and loudly began imitating some of the sounds she had made the night before. Almost instantly, Elain began to squirm, a high pitched squeal coming from her. Lucien just held on, trying not to laugh as he continued to mimic her sounds. 

“Shhhh!” she hissed, bringing one of her hands up to his mouth and trying to cover it, “No, stop…” 

Lucien pulled her hand away, rolling to pin her beneath himself as he did so, and he met her eyes again, unable to help laughing now. Elain was giggling as she kept trying to cover his mouth with one of her hands, and Lucien grabbed both of her wrists, pining them by her head. “I think, Petal.” He chuckled, “That anyone you might be concerned about overhearing us… probably already heard you last night.”

“Last night was Mabon.” She grinned, and Lucien was more than a little tickled to see the dark blush staining her cheeks. “This is today…”

“Does that make a difference?” he asked, and she nodded. “What difference? Am I suddenly supposed to not be great in bed?”

“What?” she gasped, laughing. 

“If I could make you moan last night, why shouldn’t I be able to do it this morning?”

“I just don’t want them all staring at us when we go to breakfast…”

“Oh, love.” He winked at her, “I rather think that we could walk in naked and everyone would still be watching your sister and Cassian…” he paused for a moment before adding, “… and my mother and Helion.”

“Yes…” Elain agreed, and he could feel her amusement through the bond. “She chose him in front of the whole Court.”

“She did.” Lucien agreed. “That was no small matter…”

“Does it mean they’re mates?” she asked, and Lucien shook his head, thinking. 

“No…” He replied, “But it was a rather public declaration… rumours have been circling, and she all but confirmed them.” He paused again, “If they want to be together… that would be the first step.”


	209. Chapter Two Hundred and Nine

**Chapter 209**

Elain didn’t know if she was imagining the way that eyes followed her as she and Lucien walked into the dining room for breakfast or not. Lucien squeezed her hand a little when her footsteps faltered and she smiled at him when he caught her eyes. “It’s alright…” he murmured, and Elain nodded, moving with him toward the table. She couldn’t help glancing around them, noting that more than a few of the courtiers sitting at the table for their morning meal were indeed looking their way. Eris was sitting in his usual place at the table, and Elain met his amber eyes as she sank into an empty chair beside Lucien.

“Did you two have a pleasant evening?” The High Lord of the Autumn Court asked, and Elain felt herself blush immediately. 

“Of course.” Lucien’s reply was smooth and easy, and Elain could feel that he wasn’t even the slightest bit flustered by his brother’s question. “Mabon is always a favourite, isn’t it?”

“It does have its charms.” Eris’s voice held a tone that Elain hadn’t heard from him before, and she watched him lean back in his chair as he looked them over. When she turned her eyes on the rest of the table again, Elain noted that neither Ashk or Helion, nor Nesta or Cassian had appeared. She flicked a quick glance toward the door, but nothing happened and nobody came through. 

When Lucien had finished his back and forth with Eris, her mate turned her way, evidently feeling her eyes up on him. “What is it?” he asked, and she could see the concern in his russet eye.

“Where are the others?”

“Nesta and Cassian?” he asked, his own eyes sweeping the table before returning to hers. 

“And your mother…”

“Well, Petal…” Lucien gave a quick smirk before controlling himself, “I would think they’re still in bed…” he said to her, “Likely unwilling to untangle from one another and leave their rooms…” he winked at her, “I rather wish we’d chosen that ourselves…”

“What if that’s not it?” she asked, not sure if she could picture Nesta as the ‘cuddling in bed all morning’ type.

“What else do you imagine it could be?”

“What if Ness is hurt?”

“Do you really see Cassian hurting her?”

“Not intentionally…”

“No…” Lucien shook his head, “I love you, Petal… but you’re wrong.”

“Oh?” Elain raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Cassian literally doesn’t have it in him to hurt Nesta…” He smiled at her, “And aside from that, as if she would even let him do it.”

“Ah…” Elain thought about that and then nodded. “You have a point…”

“I usually do.”

Elain narrowed her eyes at Lucien, but smiled as she did so. She then turned her attention to the platters on the table before them, and began selecting bits and pieces that looked delicious and appealing for her breakfast, she was, she realised, extremely hungry. She grinned when Lucien slid a plate of honeyed pears toward her, and she couldn’t help but transfer three of them to her own plate. 

“Work up an appetite, did we?” Lucien snickered softly, and Elain elbowed him in the ribs. 

“Shh.”

“Oh, Petal.” He gave her a lazy arrogant smile, “I’ll just bet that everyone at this table is in the exact same situation…” Elain’s gaze swept the table once more, and she had to admit that he was right. She did recall seeing at least half of them out at the fires the night before, no doubt they had all gone off into the forest just as she and Lucien had. They had all participated in Mabon. “I would wager they’re all wishing they’d stayed in bed this morning.”

“Maybe they’re all too hungry.” Elain replied, her voice barely more than a whisper. 

“Exactly.” He winked at her. 

At those words, Elain’s ears began to ring and she gasped as her vision shifted.

_*_

_Elain stood in a brightly lit room. It was somewhat like the one she and Lucien had been in before they had come down for breakfast, and Elain knew instantly that this room was a part of the Autumn Court. The window before her was large and the crimson curtains hanging from it were as opulent as anything else in the Autumn Court. Outside she could see Autumn Trees and, taking a step closer, Elain squinted at the view as she tried to work out if it was similar enough to the view from her own room to mean that this room was somewhere near her own in the Forest House._

_As soft sounds from behind Elain grew slightly louder, Elain bit her lip. This was the exact reason that she had not already turned around. She knew what this was, and what she was being shown, but she really didn’t want to actually witness it with her own innocent eyes._

_“Ugh…” Figuring that she might not be able to get out of the vision until she had seen what it was trying to show her, Elain rolled her eyes and turned around to face the rest of the room. Nesta’s bare back was the first ting that Elain saw, and she swallowed thickly before taking a step closer._

_Cassian was in the large bed with Nesta, and Elain swallowed, yet again, as she watched. The Illyrian was on his back, his large dark wings spread wide and flat beneath him, and his head resting against several pillows. Nesta was astride him, not a stitch on her, as she braced herself with her delicate hands pressed firmly to Cassian’s chest. As Elain watched, her sister moved confidently, her movements quick and even, up and down, rhythmically, as she slipped over Cassian. Enormous hands roamed Nesta’s slim back, and Elain heard Cassian’s murmured words of praise and encouragement and instant before she turned away. Facing the window again, Elain shook her head, trying not to listen to her sister’s breathy moans._

_She had no idea why she was seeing this. Closing her eyes, Elain tried to bring herself out of the vision. She knew that this was recent, she could tell by the light outside and in the room that this was from this morning, and with a weird jolt, Elain realised it might even be current and happening this very moment._

_“Wake up…” she murmured to herself, “Come on… this is very inappropriate to be showing me… I should not be seeing this…” Glancing over her shoulder, Elain wondered if there was something specific she was meant to have seen that would end the vision. As she saw Nesta throw her head back with a loud cry, however, Elain spun straight back around toward the window and squeezed her eyes shut. “No, no no…” Harder and harder, she willed herself to wake up, to end this…_

_*_

“Petal…?” Lucien’s hand moved up her wrist and forearm to her elbow and Elain opened her eyes and looked at him. 

“Oh…” She could see the concern on his face, in his eyes, and she could feel it down the bond. 

“Did you just have a vision?”

“Mhmm…” She took his hand in hers, feeling her face heat. Lucien narrowed his eyes at her reaction, that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he did so. He then leaned into her, and Elain sighed before whispering in his ear. “I saw what Ness and Cass are doing.”

Lucien gave a choked laugh and looked at her. “Right now?”

“Think so.” Elain ran a hand over her face, wishing that she could unsee the image of her sister riding the big Illyrian. “Urgh…”

“I mean…” Lucien snickered again, squeezing her hand in comfort, “… at least you know she’s not hurt.”


	210. Chapter Two Hundred and Ten

**Chapter 210**

After breakfast, Elain decided to take a walk with Lucien. There was still much of the Autumn Court that she hadn’t seen, and the room they were staying in was not part of it. As they had several hours until the afternoon when Eris was holding Court in a more formal setting, they had time to do as they wished. It would be during the afternoon that Elain would present him with his personal copy of her book, and she had brought one for Ashk, as well as several copies to be distributed around the Autumn Court as the High Lord saw fit. 

As Elain and Lucien came to a stop in one of the little courtyards, Elain turned her head to look around the place, a smile forming on her lips as she heard light birdsong among the gentle bell-like tinkle of the falling leaves. “This is beautiful.” She said, and one of Lucien’s hands slid around her waist as he drew her against his side. 

“It is.” He agreed, “I used to come out here quiet a bit as a youngling.”

“Did you?” she looked up at him, “Where was your favourite place?”

“In this courtyard?” he asked, and she heard his metallic eye click and whir as he looked around. He took her hand then, and Elain smiled again as she allowed him to lead her over to the base of several brightly coloured trees. “Here…” he began sinking down to sit on a small circle of grass and Elain went with him. 

“This is lovely…” she lifted her gaze to the trees above them, her eyes moving over their trunks so dark they appeared nearly black while their leaves were so brightly orange they almost looked to be flames. “I would bet Feyre would love to paint this.”

“Ah…” Lucien pressed his lips to Elain’s temple, “maybe it could feature in your next book…”

“I was going to write something different, remember…?”

“Yes.” His voice was soft, and Elain couldn’t help but lean into his warmth. “A place like this might still appear in your story, however.”

“I see.” She nodded, thinking about that. Smiling, Elain settled against him. That was something she hadn’t considered. All of the beautiful flowers and landscapes and gorgeous parts of Prythian she had seen while travelling with Lucien might all make it into anything she wrote. It didn’t have to be some kind of encyclopaedia or list. “I like that…”

“What might happen in a place like this?” Lucien asked her, one of his arms securely around Elain’s waist, holding her to himself. “In your stories?”

Resting her head back against her mate’s shoulder, Elain looked up at the beautiful trees again. “A quiet little courtyard like this…” she mused, “would have to be somewhere one of the main characters came for solace…” She turned her head to look at his face and she smiled, “Perhaps as a youngling… bringing books out to sit beneath these trees to hide from anyone who might disturb them.”

Lucien’s eyes, both russet and gold, looked down to meet her gaze then. “Seems familiar.” He murmured, and Elain leaned more heavily into him when his hand came up to trace gently over the garnet necklace he had given her which she still wore around her neck. 

“Hiding out here among the trees…” she went on slowly, “Learning from his books… and dreaming of the future…”

“Yes.” He pressed another kiss to her temple, and Elain could feel him down the bond. There was a little nostalgia and hurt from the past, but also pleasure and gratitude for what he had now, as well as relief at finally being able to have it.

“He will be a wonderful character.” She told him, trying to hide her smile, “Kind and clever…”

“Oh?” the smile in Lucien’s voice was evident, and Elain didn’t have to look up to know that he was grinning widely, “And wildly handsome, I’ll bet…”

“Hmm…” She pretended to think about that, “Would that detract from his character?” she asked, “Perhaps I should make him a hideous sight to behold…?”

“Perhaps to some he is.”

She looked up at him then and shook her head, lifting herself and turning so that she could sling a leg across him and pull herself into his lap. “No.” she said, bringing both hands up to his face. “He is…” Elain traced her fingertips gently down Lucien’s scar from brow to jaw, “utterly magnificent…”

“Well…” Both of Lucien’s warm hands settled at Elain’s waist, “he is certainly glad that his mate thinks so.”

“I am very certain that it’s more than just his mate.”

“She is the only one whose opinion matters, though.” His eyes were moving back and forth across Elain’s face quickly, and she felt heat flood her, “He’s waited a long time for her.”

“And was always destined to find her.”

One of Lucien’s hands came up to the garnet at her throat again. “He did dream of her…”

“And she of him.” Elain thought of her old dreams about that glade in the Spring Court, and how that place had seemed to call to the both of them, promising that one day they would have what they had desired.

“This does sound like a rather charming story.” Lucien’s eyes were on Elain’s again and she held his gaze as warmth continued to spread through her. Leaning forward, she brought her lips to his, groaning softly when he sought to deepen the kiss almost immediately. Elain wrapped one of her arms around the back of his neck as she responded to the depth of that kiss. Eventually, when she lifted her head, trying to draw a breath, she smiled at him and the look of adoration on his handsome face. 

“I think it could be the best story ever told.” She murmured, and he nodded.

“Certainly the sexiest.” His lazy arrogant smirk made Elain giggle a little and she pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose. 

“I think it will have rather more than smutty scenes…”

“Oh, I know… but … I am certain there will be time for those as well…”

“Maybe…”

“They would give you plenty of opportunity to write about all those beautiful flowers and trees that you wanted to include… providing these characters enjoy outdoor activities…”

Leaning into him once again, Elain rested her forehead against Lucien’s as she looked at him. “Something tells me that they do.” She breathed and he gave a low laugh. 

“I had that feeling.”

Elain’s eyes closed when his warm hand moved up her back while the other continued to stroke the garnet at her throat. “Perhaps…” she murmured, “We should continue to walk…?”

“Are you done here?” he asked, and Elain wanted to shake her head and tell him that she wasn’t. She wanted to stay right here and do exactly this, but she rather suspected that if they did not get up and continue their walk they risked doing something that could be embarrassing if discovered by anyone walking past. It wasn’t dark, and it wasn’t Mabon. Elain did not want to stir any more talk than they already did. 

“We have several hours to fill.” She breathed, “And you promised to show me many more places…”

“It’s true.” He agreed, his hands sliding back down to her waist, “I did promise…”


	211. Chapter Two Hundred and Eleven

**Chapter 211**

Lucien slipped his hand into Elain’s as they walked, his heart swelling when she tightened her grip, squeezing his hand for a moment. “You mentioned something about that tower…”

“Oh?” Looking down at her, he lifted an eyebrow. Elain fluttered her eyelashes at him as she lifted her free hand and pointed up. Lucien glanced up and nodded as his eyes fell on the tallest turret attached to the House. He had indeed told her that he would show her the view from up there and he looked back down at her with a smile. “I did, didn’t I?”

“Mhm.”

“Come on, then.” He led her toward a nearby door, pulling it open and ushering her through with a slight bow. Elain giggled, and took his hand again. “You will very much enjoy the view, Petal.”

“This is what you promised me.” She winked at him. “Let’s hope you don’t disappoint…”

“Well, I would never want to do that.”

“You never have.” Elain tucked her arm through his and Lucien smiled down at her as he pulled her in closer. Just feeling Elain’s gentle heat pressing against him as they walked up the hallway had him thinking about how he saw everything differently now. The gentle Autumn light filtering in through the window gave the whole corridor a pleasant glow and it seemed bright and inviting. This was in contrast to the way that he had often seen this same hallway when he’d been younger, and he had run up here every few days when trying to hide from his brothers. “What’s up the tower?” She asked, and he stroked her arm. 

“Well, it used to be a bit of a sitting room. Older furniture, and things not currently in use in the areas usually occupied by guests visiting the court.”

“Oh?” Elain asked, and Lucien loved the smile that she gave him when she looked up at him, tucked into his side. He nodded and bent to press a kiss to her forehead as they walked leisurely up the hallway. 

“Yes,” he murmured, “I don’t know if it’s still the same. I never made it up here the last few visits.”

“Do you think it still doesn’t get used?”

“Probably.” He replied, "I can’t really see Eris coming up here and staring out at the view.”

“He might.” Elain said softly, “If he needs somewhere to escape from being the High Lord.”

Nodding, Lucien thought about that. He supposed that it would make sense that Eris would need somewhere to run and hide. He knew that his brother had always been particularly good at all of the responsibilities and duties of the High Lord, even when Beron had been alive, but that didn’t mean that he would be able to handle them constantly, especially when there was nobody to share that responsibility with. Eris would need to have somewhere he could just be himself, and Lucien had no idea where that would be. Over the years he had never really paid that much attention to where his brother had disappeared off to. “I suppose so.”

Elain paused when they reached a door, and Lucien pulled it open to reveal a flight of narrow stairs. They wouldn’t be able to walk up them side by side, so he gestured for her to go first and she gave him a wink which heated his blood before she moved ahead of him, looking back over her shoulder. Those gorgeous dark eyes seemed to beckon him to follow her, so Lucien hurriedly did so, pulling the door closed behind himself. “Don’t know how I’m going to manage to enjoy the view with you looking at me like that…” 

“Oh?” she asked, and he could hear the teasing note in her voice as she walked ahead of him up the stairs. 

“I’ll never be able to take my eyes off of you.”

“I am certain you will manage.”

Biting his lip as he watched her, Lucien allowed his eyes to move up and down over his mate. Reaching a hand out then, he slid it down her back, squeezing at her arse, and grinning widely when she gave a squeal and spun around to face him. 

*

“Excuse you.” She said, standing with her hands on her hips as she met Lucien’s gaze straight on. Standing several steps above him on the staircase put Elain at around the same height as her mate, and she enjoyed being able to look him straight in the face while trying to keep her expression serious. “What do you think you are doing?”

“Couldn’t help myself, Petal.” He said, his grin not going anywhere. “You were looking at me with your ‘fuck me’ eyes… and then teasing me with that little walk…”

Raising an eyebrow at him, Elain had to work hard to keep a smile off of her own face. She’d given him that look deliberately, and then had definitely been exaggerating the sway of her hips as she had walked ahead of him. “Do you have no self-control?” She couldn’t help a slight grin then. Nobody she had ever met had more self-control than Lucien. 

“Ahh… are you mad at me, Petal?” She could tell from the tone of his voice, that he didn’t actually think she was upset, but she decided to play along. 

“Possibly…” her eyes moved over him, “… What are you going to do about it?”

“Well…” Lucien stepped up one step, closer to her, and Elain had to lift her eyes to meet his then. “… how flexible do you think we could be on these stairs…?”

“Uh…” Elain was actually surprised by that. She looked up and down the staircase for a moment, trying to picture it, but then shook her head. “Didn’t you say there was actual furniture up the top?”

“Chairs, couches…” 

“Doesn’t that sound better?” She asked, grinning, “… and with a view.”

“You may be correct…” Lucien took one of her hands and lifted it to his lips. Elain’s heart beat enthusiastically as he kissed it, and she met his eyes again. “Lead the way, love.” Turning, she continued up the stairs, still holding on to her mate’s hand as he followed her. 

The stairs creaked beneath them as they climbed and, before too long, Elain could see a faint glow that had to mean they were reaching the top. Her heart began to beat more enthusiastically in anticipation and she squeezed Lucien’s hand an instant before she felt him hot at her back as he other hand snaked around her waist and she felt his lips at her throat. Laughing, she pushed aside the small hanging draped across the door at the top of the stairs. “Show me the view first…” she breathed, moving into one of the small rooms at the top. 

“This is just the entrance.” Lucien told her, indicating another door to the right. “The view is through here.”

Elain moved for the door, pushing it open and walking in. She saw the large glass window, and the hint of trees and sky beyond, before movement by the far wall caught her attention, and she stopped dead in her tracks. 

Ashk’s dress was hiked up around her hips, her pale legs hooked around Helion’s waist, and her red hair messed and wild about her face as she clung to the High Lord of the Day Court who had her pressed firmly into the wall as he moved rhythmically, his bare arse on full display as he thrust repeatedly into her. Elain felt her jaw drop as she resisted a gasp and then spun away turning straight into Lucien who had also frozen on his way through the door. 

Elain lifted both of her hands to her mate’s chest and she pushed him straight back out the door. It hadn’t seemed as if Ashk or Helion had noticed them, but Elain kept pushing until she and Lucien were halfway down the stairs again. “Oh… my…” she breathed, not knowing what else to say. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” Lucien muttered, and Elain turned her eyes on him. She didn’t think that was something she ever would have wanted to walk in on her parents doing, and she wondered what his reaction would be to the sight he had just seen. “… do you think they’ve been doing that since last night?”

Blinking, Elain tilted her head. “… Probably.” She murmured, “But her dress was different… so… clearly they’ve at least changed…”

“Small mercies.” Lucien said, and Elain took his hand once more. 

“Do you think maybe they’ll stay together now?” She asked him, and felt a small sliver of hope reach her down the bond. 

“I hope so.” He replied, “If they’re happy.”

“Me too.” She replied, slanting another look at him. “Although, that wasn’t the view you promised me…”


	212. Chapter Two Hundred and Twelve

**Chapter 212**

Elain spent the afternoon trying to keep Lucien distracted from what they had walked in on up in the tower, although he seemed far more at peace with it than she had expected. Perhaps, she figured, that over the centuries he had grown accustomed to the idea of his mother engaged in such activities. He didn’t seem to be put off by it at all. 

They had sat together and read, and Elain had realised that she missed doing such simple things with Lucien when they had no other obligations or responsibilities. They were free to just be with one another, with nowhere else to be until later that afternoon. It had reminded her of their time together out in Rhys’ garden in the Night Court, and Elain decided that the next time they were back there, she was taking him outside to sit under that tree. She also very much wanted to check on the gardens she had created, and she made the mental note that they would have to visit the Night Court rather soon. 

By the time they had to head down to Eris’ throne room, Elain found herself wishing that she and Lucien could just move to the bed and have a nap instead. Nevertheless, she got to her feet, stretching and yawning as she did so, with Lucien getting up beside her. She watched him as he moved across the room to pick up the pile of books that she would need, and she gave him a thankful smile when he turned back to her. 

“Lead the way, Petal.”

“Alright…” Elain opened the door to the hallway, and stepped back to let him through. They then walked side by side toward the throne room, Elain wondering if Ashk and Helion would be there, and if they had finished up in the tower, or anywhere else they might have gone. She also wondered if they had indeed noticed herself and Lucien having walked in on them, or if they had been too preoccupied with one another. It hadn’t seemed like they had noticed, but she hadn’t really been paying attention to that.

“Are you nervous?” Lucien asked as they approached the throne room doors, and Elain shook her head. 

“No…” She said, “Do I have reason to be?”

“I wouldn’t think so.”

“I was just wondering if Ashk and Helion would be in here…” She watched Lucien slant a glance her way.

“I would expect so…” he replied, “Nesta and Cassian, too…”

“Ohh…” Elain hadn’t even considered that she might see her sister and, considering the last glimpse she’d gotten of Nesta had been during that awkward vision she had had at breakfast, she didn’t know how she was going to keep a straight face. Lucien just chuckled as they went through the door, and moved to find an empty place to stand with proper view of and access to the dias upon which Eris sat in his throne.

Elain looked up at the High Lord of the Autumn Court. He was lounging elegant, and yet casually, upon the throne. A light crown of silver leaves and rubies sat upon his vibrant hair, and there was a definite air of bored arrogance coming off of him. Elain found it fascinating. This Eris looked so much more relaxed than she had previously assumed him to be. She had always seen him as this astute and efficient courtier, ever ready to jump upon whatever task needed to be done. Right now, however, he looked as if nothing less than an earthquake could make him get off of that throne. Glancing at her mate, Elain rather thought that Lucien was thinking the same thing she had been because his head was tilted and his eyes slightly narrowed as he looked up at his brother. 

“Lucien?” she murmured, and his eyes flicked her way. 

“It’s just a little interesting…” he replied, his tone soft. 

“Eris being all… that…” she nodded her head toward the throne, and Lucien nodded. “What is he doing?” 

“I have no idea.”

A sudden hush fell over the hall, and Elain let her gaze sweep the room. Her breath caught when she saw Nesta standing by the wall near the door, Cassian beside her. Those fierce blue-grey eyes met hers an instant later, and Nesta gave her a flicker of a smile by way of greeting. Elain wanted nothing more than to cross the room to her sister, to talk to her, to ask her about what had happened, and how she felt, but Eris waved an elegant hand, and all eyes turned his way. 

Elain listened to the usual tirade, the pleasant greetings, the talk about Mabon and the festivities the previous night, only really half paying attention. But then she heard her name, and she realised that Eris’ amber eyes were firmly upon her. Lucien handed her one of the books from the pile he held, and she took it before moving forward to stand in the usual place where she could address the throne. 

“Elain…”

“High Lord,” she replied, bowing as etiquette required. Eris smiled at her and gestured for her to stand up. 

“No need to be on ceremony.” He said, eyes crinkling at the corners, “We’re family after all.” Elain nodded, smiling at that, and holding the book more tightly in her hands. “You have something for me?”

“Yes.” She said, showing him the cover. “As promised, a copy just for you. I could not have completed it without your recommendations…”

“I am certain you would have managed.” He said, reaching a hand out. Elain stepped forward, up on the dais to pass him the book. “I am touched that you felt the need to deliver this to me personally.”

“It was no trouble.” She replied, “We are family…” she smiled at him, “and also we had planned to visit for Mabon.”

“It all worked out perfectly then.” Eris said, flicking through the pages of the book, his eyes moving quickly to take in everything he was looking at. He paused for a second then, fingers brushing across one of the pages. “It has been a long time since I have seen the Eisblume garden in the Winter Court…”

“It is beautiful.” Elain replied, smiling. 

“Yes… I remember it so.” He looked up then, eyes meeting hers. “You may have inspired me to visit my neighbours.” Elain couldn’t help the grin at those words. This had, after all, been one of the goals of the book. She had hoped to foster relationships between the courts, and travelling between them in order to see some of the blooms she had selected for the book was certainly a part of that. 

“I am pleased by that.” She said, then added, “I brought a few more copies…” Lucien was suddenly standing beside her with the pile of books in his arms. “They are for your libraries, and to distribute as you see fit.”

“Thank you.” Eris made a gesture and suddenly a slim lesser faerie appeared beside Lucien. She took the pile from him with what appeared to be little effort and then carried them toward the dais. 

Elain watched Eris, taking in the way his amber eyes followed the faerie. Only his eyes followed her until she must have reached the edge of his periphery, and then his head turned to continue watching her. When she disappeared through a door with the pile of books, Eris’ attention returned to Elain and Lucien. “I thank you for your gift.” His smile appeared genuine, and Elain took Lucien’s hand. “You are welcome to remain here as long as you wish.”

“Thank you.” Elain inclined her head a little by way of acknowledgement. She had been about to bow again, before remembering that Eris had told her she didn’t need to be so formal because they were family. He smiled at her again and she simply took a step back, with Lucien, before turning to return to where they had been standing earlier.


	213. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirteen

**Chapter 213**

The Autumn Court was alive with bustling energy that afternoon, and Elain couldn’t help but listen to the things said and whispered around her. She and Lucien had chosen a table by the far wall of one of Eris’ sitting rooms at which to spend their afternoon, and Elain had quickly realised that much of the Court intended to use the room as well.

The idea had been to sit somewhere public enough so that Nesta and Cassian would be free to join them, yet private enough that Elain might speak with her sister properly. Now, however, the room echoed with the soft murmurings of the Courtiers, and Elain was almost growing tired of it. Almost, she figured, but not quite, as it seemed that the favourite topic of the afternoon was speculation on who the High Lord of the Autumn Court had taken to bed on the evening of Mabon. Nobody, it seemed, had seen him. 

“How do they even know he went with anyone?” Elain whispered to Lucien who raised an eyebrow at her. 

“He’s the High Lord. Of course he participated.” He replied, “Besides, Eris has always participated in Mabon.”

“With anyone in particular?” She pressed, interested despite herself. Lucien gave a low shrug. 

“I don’t know.” He said softly, “Whoever would have him? Which, is probably just about anyone.”

“Into more casual encounters, is he?”

Lucien looked properly at her then, both his eyes, russet and gold, focusing on her. “Why are you so interested, Petal?” he asked, and Elain shook her head. 

“I don’t know.” She replied, “The way that he looked at that lesser faerie when she carried the books from the room…”

“Eris with a lesser fae?” The disbelief was thick in Lucien’s voice, and Elain knew that he was thinking about what had happened to Jesminda in that very same hall. Reaching across the table to him, she took her mate’s hand in hers. She didn’t say anything, but just let him be, let his mind process whatever it was he was thinking about, but she held firmly to his hand, letting him know that she was there if he needed her. Lucien was silent for a while, and Elain just sat and waited. 

Letting her own mind wander, she listened more intently to the conversations wafting around her. There seemed a lot of gossip about Eris, as well as the fact that the Lady of the Autumn Court had not yet been spotted by anyone. Elain thought about the last time she and Lucien had seen Ashk, and she doubted that information would be useful to anyone at all. She could practically still hear the sounds coming out of the other female, and she felt her own cheeks heat in response to that.

By the time that Nesta sat down next to Elain at the table, Elain almost didn’t notice at all. It wasn’t until a strange hush fell over the room that she noticed anything at all. “Elain…” Nesta’s voice was soft, and her sister was looking at her with large eyes that Elain was certain saw more than they should have. 

“Nes!” Elain leaned toward her elder sister, wrapping her arms around her. “Are you okay?” After several moments, the chatter around the room began again, and more than a few of those whispering made no show of openly watching them. When she could meet Nesta’s eyes, Elain held her gaze. 

“I am just fine.” Nesta said, and the look in those eyes told Elain that her elder sister was very much aware of all that was going on around her. “I hope that you were not too concerned.”

“No more than you would have been…” Elain wasn’t sure if she meant how Nesta had actually been concerned for her when she’d gone travelling with Lucien, or if she was referring to how worried Elain herself had been when she’d first been with Lucien. 

“I hadn’t realised that so many would pay attention to the actions of others not even belonging to the Court.” Nesta, Elain realised, was already tired of this kind of attention, and she couldn’t help a grin. Going anywhere with Cassian was going to be worthy of the Courts discussing their relationship yet. 

“Court life.” Elain agreed, “You should have heard what they have been speculating about Eris.”

“He’s their High Lord.” Nesta replied, “I… I am not that interesting.”

Elain had to disagree with that. Even if one ignored what was interesting bout Nesta alone, she was still the sister of the High Lady of the Night Court, and she was with Cassian, and Elain knew that he often sparked gossip sessions among the women of whichever Court he was in. “Oh, Nes.” She grinned, “You are, and so is Cassian.”

Nesta looked more than a little put out by that response, and Elain couldn’t help but grin. 

“I suppose…” Nesta said then, her eyes on Elain. “I suppose that you wish to question me.”

“You did question me…”

“Yes, well… get it over with.”

Elain gave as soft laugh then and shook her head while smoothing her hair back. “No…” she grinned, “I… I don’t think that I need to ask you a million questions. Just… how are you? Are you alright?”

“I am.” Nesta nodded, her expression solemn. 

“Okay.” Elain smiled at her, grateful that Nesta couldn’t have visions the way that she could, and grateful that her sister had no way of knowing what she had seen in her vision. She didn’t need to ask Nesta a million questions because she had seen enough on her own.


	214. Chapter Two Hundred and Fourteen

**Chapter 214**

Eris seemed distracted during dinner, and Elain had given up even pretending that she wasn’t watching him. Lucien’s hand moved over her thigh beneath the table, and she knew that her mate was trying to get her attention. When she looked up at him, he raised an eyebrow, giving her a questioning look, and she gave him an innocent smile in return. Lucien’s fingers curled around the inside of Elain’s thigh as they slid higher, and Elain felt her eyes widen as she looked at him. 

“What are you looking at?” he asked her, and Elain shook her head. 

“The High Lord.”

“Why?” Lucien asked as some of those around them began getting to their feet once the dishes had been cleared. Elain watched some of the lesser fae collecting bowls from around the table, and then her eyes went back to Eris. 

“Your brother… seems…” She broke off when Eris’ amber eyes flicked to a female faerie who had just collected the bowl from in front of him. He smiled and said something quietly, and the faerie gave a slight nod of her head. 

“Seems what?” Lucien asked, glancing around and toward the head of the table where Eris sat. 

Elain hesitated before replying, but then Lucien had turned back to her and she met his eyes. “Have you noticed the way he looks at that female?”

Russet and gold eyes swept the room again and Elain watched him focus on the faerie Eris was still watching. Confusion and disbelief reached Elain down the bond then, and she reached a hand out to her mate, her fingers brushing against his leg. He met her eyes again, and Elain bit her lip. She had no idea how Lucien would react to the idea of Eris and a lesser fae female after what had happened to Jesminda because he had loved her. Lucien just blinked, before looking once more toward the end of the table, those eyes focusing on his brother who was still watching the female he had seemingly been unable to take his eyes off of.

Elain didn’t think that anyone else at the table or around the room had noticed that the High Lord’s attentions had been captured, as the usual amount of chatter and talk was echoing around the room. More and more of the Courtiers from the table had gotten up and were mingling and milling about the room, shifting to smaller tables where they could sit and talk more comfortably. She swept the room with her eyes once more before looking back to Eris. Elain didn’t think that he had even noticed that half his Court was no longer sitting at his table. 

“Surely not…” Lucien murmured, and Elain turned in her seat to better look at her mate.

“Are you alright?” she asked, and a flash of various emotions rushed through him and down the bond to her. 

“He…” Lucien shook his head, pushing his chair back from the table and getting to his feet. Elain followed him. “How…?”

“Lucien…” Elain reached out for him, taking his hand. He allowed it, but drew her away from the table, and Elain followed him across the room and into a comfortable couch by one of the fires. “Lucien…?” She could feel all manner of things swirling around within him, and she couldn’t identify a single one apart from hurt. “Love…”

“I’m alright, Petal…” Lucien’s free hand slid up Elain’s arm, past her elbow, as he pulled her in and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. 

“I can feel you…” she murmured, and he nodded. 

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to say, really.” He sat back, and she saw his gaze head toward his brother again. “It would just be strange…” he murmured, “To see Eris with…” Lucien shook his head. “If he was able to manage that… I never would have thought. Beron would never have allowed it…”

“No…” Elain said gently, “Do you think maybe it’s been going that long?”

“I have no idea…” Lucien shook his head, “I wouldn’t have thought so. It certainly couldn’t have been while I was here. Beron would have known. He would have put a stop to it… like he did with me.” He paused for a moment, “… and Eris would have killed him.”

“It must be fairly new, then.”

“I would think so.”

“So, that must have been where he went for Mabon?”

“It does seem likely.”

Elain looked at Lucien again, her fingers skimming his arm as she gazed at him. “Do you think he will ever actually acknowledge it?”

“I couldn’t say, Petal.” Lucien said, “People would talk… but… he’s the High Lord, so there is nothing anyone would be able to do…”

“Are you okay?” she asked, “… I mean, he… you were punished for the same thing…” her eyes followed as Lucien lifted one of her hands to his lips, kissing it gently. 

“I’m okay.” He replied, and he smiled then, easing Elain’s heart and diminishing any worry that she had held. “I would like to talk to Eris and find out a little bit more, though.”

“Do you think he would be receptive to that?”

“There’s only one way to find out, isn’t there?”

“I suppose you are correct.” Elain sat back in the chair, then. She knew that Lucien wasn’t going to leave this room until he had had the chance to speak with his brother. It wasn’t all that late in the evening, and so they had quite some time to sit and watch the room before Courtiers began to head off to their own rooms and lives and beds. Elain had even begun to doze slightly before someone sat down in the chair opposite them, and she felt Lucien sit up a little more straight.

“Your mate seems tired.” Eris’ voice was soft, and Elain blinked as she tried to wake herself up a little. 

“I’ll take her off to bed soon.” Lucien’s response matched his brother’s in tone, and one of her mate’s hands glided down her arm, soothing. “You seemed a little preoccupied at dinner.”

“Did I?” 

“Yes.” Elain could feel Lucien searching for a way to bring up the topic he really wanted to discuss. Sitting up, she wondered if she might be able to help. “Something on your mind?” Lucien went on, and Eris shook his head.

“Nothing beyond the usual…” running a hand though his vibrant hair, Eris’ amber eyes moved over them. “Might have been wondering if our mother is going to remain here in the Autumn Court or if she desires to leave and go to the Day Court with her lover.”

“What do you think she wants?” Lucien asked. 

“I don’t think she’s used to taking her own wants into consideration.” Eris said. “It will take time for her to accept that she has that freedom.”

“I would agree.” Lucien’s voice was gentle then. “And your own wants?”

“What of them?” Eris sounded a little wary. 

“Beron is dead now. You are High Lord.” Lucien sounded as if he were explaining the most simple thing in the world to someone who just couldn’t grasp it. “You can do whatever you wish… have whoever you wish…”

Eris’ amber eyes narrowed, and Elain watched him twist his hands together in his lap. “Things are never that simple.”

“Yes, they are.” Lucien replied. “If you make them that simple.”


	215. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifteen

**Chapter 215**

By the next morning Elain was thinking about preparing to pack in order to head on to the Winter Court as she moved around the room she shared with Lucien. She kept one eye on her mate who was sitting on the couch, more silent than was usual, a thoughtful expression on his face. Elain eyed him as she came to sit beside him and, after several moments, he turned his head toward her. “Are you thinking about your brother?” she asked, and Lucien nodded. “Do you think that he will acknowledge his lover publicly?”

“I don’t know.”

“It must be quite difficult for him.”

“I should think so.” Lucien replied, “I’d bet he is worried that if he is to seen to be with a lesser faerie, that someone will think that means they could attempt to take his throne.”

“Ah…” Elain breathed, “Which do you think Eris would choose? His lover or his throne?”

Lucien gave Elain a long look. “I would have always said he would choose the throne first and foremost, it is what he has always wanted.” He ran his hand through his vibrant hair, and Elain watched him, “I would be most surprised if this new lover sits above his throne in Eris’ priorities.”

“Maybe he really loves her.”

Lucien raised an eyebrow and that thoughtful look returned to his features. “Perhaps.” He said, “Wouldn’t that be something?”

“I suppose so.”

“I just wonder how long it has been.” Lucien murmured, “Or where he found her.”

Elain nodded, about to tell him that she had been wondering the same thing when her ears began to ring in that way she had begun to find familiar.

_  
Eris drew one deep breath after another, the panic rising within him. It was all too much and he couldn’t take it. Elain frowned, realising that she was witnessing something that had taken place a matter of months ago. She could feel the anxiety coming off of Eris as he took the stairs two at a time and, looking around, Elain realised that these were the stairs to the tower that Lucien had shown her when they had come across Ashk and Helion._

_Now, Eris was just about bolting up the stairs and Elain followed him. She had learned that she had to remain with him from the times she had found herself in some of Lucien’s memories. It took her some effort to keep up with Eris as his legs were rather longer than hers and he seemed to determined to get to the top of the tower as quickly as possible._

_When they reached the top, Eris went straight for the window. Elain followed him, getting a proper look at the view for the first time. She could see so much more of the forest than she had expected, with such a brilliant sky over it. Unable to help herself, Elains’ gaze swept the forest and the trees. Her breath caught at the sight of all the colours, all rubies and golden topaz. It was truly stunning and she wished that she had been able to see this with Lucien when he’d brought her up here._

_“Cauldron boil and fry me.” Eris muttered, his hands moving through his hair and then down over his face. Elain watched him, unable to do anything as he seemed to shrink in on himself._

_His shoulders shook as he held his face in his hands, and Elain wondered if he wasn’t crying._

_Moving a little closer, Elain peered at him, wondering what it was that had gotten him so worked up like this. She didn’t think she had ever pictured Eris like this, and she wondered if anyone had ever seen him this way at all. Perhaps that was why he had come up here all alone, so that nobody would see him in this position. No doubt Eris would have thought that it would make him look weak. Anxiety and fear were rolling off of Eris in waves and Elain frowned as she watched him._

_Movement by the wall caught Elain’s attention then, and she turned at the same moment as Eris. “Who is there?” he asked, voice suddenly commanding and much more like the Eris that Elain had come to know._

_“I… I am sorry…” a soft female voice from the shadows._

_“Come here.”_

_“Yes, Lord.” The female faerie Eris had been watching the night before stepped into the light, her large dark eyes on the floor. Elain looked at her, taking her in properly for the first time. Her skin was a pale brown colour and her hair the colour of the soil out in the forest. She had pointed feral features, and what appeared to be pale translucent wings coming from her shoulder blades. “I… did not intend to intrude.” She said softly, “I… I was told to tidy up…”_

_“Who are you?” Eris’ amber eyes were moving over her with an interest Elain had never seen in him before._

_“Nobody…”_

_Eris took a step toward the female then, and Elain was unsurprised to see her take a startled step backwards. Eris froze, eyes widening. “You need not be afraid of me.” He was watching her closely, and Elain noticed that his anxiety seemed to have vanished. “What is your name?”_

_“I… I… Nera.”_

_“Nera.” Eris repeated, “How long have you been here?”_

_“I… do you mean in the Court?” She asked, and Elain saw a hint of a smile, “Or in the corner trying not to be noticed?”_

_“I mean in the Court.” Eris’ reply sounded amused, “I don’t believe I have met you before…”_

_“I don’t think anyone would have thought to introduce me to you…” She said, “I’ve been here since the equinox.” Her brown hands twisted the front of her dress as she looked at Eris. “It hasn’t been that long.”_

_“What are your duties?” Eris asked, moving toward her again, “What are your opinions of the Court?”_

_“They’ve had me doing lots of things. Working in the kitchens and cleaning… rooms like this one. I didn’t know you would be up here…” She looked shyly up at him, “I wouldn’t have thought to intrude…” Elain watched her bite her lip, “You obviously came up here to be alone…”_

_“I did.”_

_“I apologise…” Nera said, “I will leave…”_

_“No…” Eris held up a hand, “I would like to speak to you…” he gestured for her to approach, “Someone new to talk to… and you haven’t told me what you think of the Court.”_

_“Well…” Nera smiled, “I like it so far.”_

_“You may tell me the truth.” Eris said, “I won’t punish you.”_

_“It is the truth.” Nera replied, looking up at him with more confidence, “It’s good work and I have been treated better than I expected… They all speak well of you, too.”_

_“Do they?”_

_“They all say you will make an excellent High Lord.”_

_Eris smiled then, and Elain knew that it was a genuine smile.  
_

Shaking her head, Elain leaned into Lucien on the couch. He raised an eyebrow looking at her, and she knew that he was asking her what she had just seen. Reaching a hand out to him, Elain pushed the vision toward her mate. “When they first met…” she breathed, and Lucien closed his hand around her wrist.


	216. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixteen

**Chapter 216**

_  
Eris took the stairs two at a time, his eyes already lifted toward the top of the tower. It had become a nearly nightly ritual over the last few weeks. He would wait until most of the House was asleep, and then he would hurry up to the tower to find Nera. She was usually waiting for him in chairs they had set up by the window with the best view of the forest, and they would just talk. Eris had found it cathartic, and he looked forward to it every evening. It wasn’t something he had ever really had; someone to talk to who didn’t want him to do something or them, or who was being polite because he was Beron’s eldest son. Nera had never asked him for anything and he didn’t think that she was just being polite showing up for him every night like this. She seemed to actually enjoy speaking with him as much as he enjoyed speaking with her. She seemed to actually enjoy his company, and it didn’t seem to matter to her who he was. Eris liked that._

_Nera was not sitting in the chairs by the window when Eris got there, and he swallowed the brief moment of disappointment that rose within him. Perhaps she wasn’t coming. Perhaps she had only come to be polite after all. Maybe it had become too much effort when she wasn’t actually getting anything out of these meetings besides conversation. Deciding then, that he was jumping to conclusions, Eris sat down to wait a little while. It was entirely possible that Nera had had trouble sneaking away once she had finished her tasks for the night. He realised then that she had to enjoy coming up here with him because she worked all day and what sleep she was able to get was precious. For her to be giving several of those hours away for him meant something._

_Sitting back, he watched the window and the view outside. The dark trunks of the trees sway slightly in the breeze, and Eris wished that this was a window that opened. He would have loved to feel that breeze, and he suspected that Nera would have appreciated it as well. Perhaps, he thought, he would ask her if maybe one night she would prefer going for a walk with him out in the forest. Eris wondered if she even got to go out all that much, or if all of her work was confined within the walls of the house. He would ask her that, too._

_Or not. He thought a moment later. What if she thought hat he saw himself as someone who could rescue her from her life and show her things she’d never experienced before? He was pretty certain she’d experienced breeze before, however. He could still ask her if she would like to go for a walk. That seemed pretty safe. If she even came tonight, that was._

_As if on cue, Eris heard footsteps on the stairs and he turned to watch the door as she came up and into the room. He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face when she saw him and raised a hand in silent greeting. “How are you tonight?” he asked as Nera came closer and sank down onto the chair beside him._

_“I am well. How are you?”_

_Nodding, Eris smiled again at her gentle voice. Just the sound of it on nights like this helped to make him feel lighter. “I am better now.” He said, “Tomorrow is a new day.”_

_“Indeed it is.” She replied, “And you can do whatever you like to make it a pleasant day.”_

_“You think so?”_

_“I know so.” She smiled at him, gentleness radiating from her as her dark eyes locked onto his face. “Think of something that you can look forward to.”_

_“Well, I look forward to our talks at the end of the evening…”_

_Nera smiled at that. “As do I…” she told him, “But think of something else…”_

_“Well, I was thinking of taking a walk out in the fresh air beneath the trees…” He watched her carefully before adding the next bit. “… Would you be interested in joining me?” Her head tilted and Eris watched dark eyes flick back and forth across her face._

_“Instead of meeting you up here?”_

_“If you’d like…”_

_“So that nobody would see?”_

_“Well, I wouldn’t want anyone else deciding to come with us.” He said, “I like the way I am when it’s just the two of us. I feel as if I can be myself. I don’t have to make decisions that will impact anyone’s lives, and I don’t have to watch what I say and talk about certain things…”_

_“Does it make you feel free?” Nera asked, the corners of her mouth curling slightly._

_“It does, actually.” Eris slid a little closer on the couch, watching her intently, “Did you know that you were doing that?”_

_“No…” He thought she might have blushed, but it was hard to tell with the gorgeous brown colour of her skin, and the dim light. The shy way that she glanced down at her hands, however, told him all he needed to know. “I… I am glad, though.”_

_Eris smiled at her, shifting even closer. “I am glad that I met you… and that you make the time to come and speak to me every night…”_

_“I like it, too.” She replied, “It’s nice to talk to someone who isn’t telling me to tidy up, or light fires, or clean the floors…”_

_Eris laughed a little then. “Would you like me to make sure that…” he paused, not knowing what he was about to say. He couldn’t offer to take away her work, that was why she was here, and he had decided that he wasn’t going to do that sort of thing. She wasn’t here because of what he could do for her. “that…” he thought quickly, “… your jobs are not too late in the evening… so that you have time for yourself before… this.”_

_“Oh…” Nera tilted her head again, looking at him. “Are you worried that I’ll be too tired to talk to you?”_

_“I just … want to be considerate…”_

_She smiled at him again and Eris moved even closer. He was surprised when Nera did the same, her dark eyes on his face once more. “I have no expectation that you would do something like that.” She said, “And I would have time for you no matter what I have to do during the day.”_

_“I am pleased to hear it.” He hadn’t made the choice to touch her, but he found his hand on her arm, sliding up to her shoulder. Nera leaned into him, and Eris decided to stop thinking about everything he was doing. He smiled at her, wondering if he was imagining the way she shifted even closer, leaning into his touch. Her eyes held his gaze, and Eris had hardly noticed that his other hand had come up to her cheek. He had the brief flicker of a thought that he was glad nobody was around to see any of this, but then he’d decided that he didn’t care and that Nera was the only thing he was going to focus on here._

_He’d leaned toward her, pausing only when he wondered if she wanted this, or if she was just letting him do as he liked because of who he was. The thought lasted only a moment before he dismissed it, but before he could do anything else, Nera had closed the distance between them and kissed him._

Elain sat up in bed, the sunshine floating softly through the window and across the covers, casting everything in a golden light. Lucien watched her and she smiled at him when he lifted a hand to rest atop her knee. “Everything alright love?” he asked, and she nodded her head. She didn’t know if what she had seen would be appropriate to share with Lucien. Eris probably wouldn’t enjoy that moment being shared around, especially with his brother. 

“Everything is fine.” She linked her fingers through her mate’s. “We should get up. It’s our last day in the Autumn Court.”


	217. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventeen

**Chapter 217**

The smell was the first thing that hit Elain when she and Lucien were strolling up the corridor the next morning. An instant later, Lucien had flung an arm out in front of her, stopping her going any further, and she had noticed how rigid he had gone. Elain could tell just how alert Lucien was, and she was surprised that it could happen so instantly, and yet she also wasn’t. “Stop…” he breathed, and Elain looked up at him, watching as he scented the air, his head tilting and that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he looked around them.

“What is that smell?” she asked, and he flicked a glance her way. 

“Burned flesh.”

“… _what_?”

“Let me go first…” Lucien murmured, moving in front of her, and Elain allowed him to go ahead. 

“Okay…” Following him, Elain held her breath, not wanting to breathe any more of the awful smell filling the hallways. Burned flesh? Why would there be burned flesh here? “… ohh.” Elain froze on the spot when she and Lucien came around the corner and saw the horror before them. 

Nera was crouched by the wall, her hands over her face, and her dark eyes wide and peeking out from between her fingers. Eris stood nearby, looking agitated, and before them all on the floor in the centre of the hallway was a large black charred mess. 

“… what happened here?” Lucien asked, his voice sharp. Eris’s amber eyes flicked toward his brother and Elain watched as he straightened his back. 

“I…” 

Her gaze sliding to Nera on the floor, Elain took several steps forward, bending to the other female. “Are you alright?” The second she touched Nera’s arm, Elain’s ears began to ring. 

_  
She was late. Elain looked down at her pale brown hands, and realised that she was seeing this through Nera’s eyes, hearing her thoughts and, judging by the anxiety about being late, feeling what the other female was feeling. Her gaze lifting back to the corridor, Nera quickened her step. She didn’t want to be late. She knew that if she wasn’t there before the others then she wouldn’t be able to claim the serving platters that had been put together for Eris. Nera had taken to being first to arrive because it gave her the opportunity to be the one to serve him at meals, and she enjoyed getting to see him and speak to him even if for a moment during the day when they’re not sequestered away in the dark tower ._

_Passing the training square, Nera gave a small gasp when a large arm suddenly came down in front of her, blocking her path, and she skid to a halt, looking up at the male standing in her way. She didn’t know his name, but she recognised him from some of the meals she had served in the dining room._

_“Hello, pretty.” He smirked, and Nera tried to step back and away from him._

_“… Hello.”_

_“Where are you off to in such a hurry?”_

_“… I have to serve breakfast.”_

_“Ah…” He didn’t move or get out of her way. His hand suddenly came down, sliding around her wrist and tightening, and Nera felt her pulse quicken in fear._

_“I… have to go.”_

_“Surely you can spare a few minutes.”_

_“I… no…” She tried not to bite her lip, tried not to look uncertain. He just smiled at her._

_“They can find someone else to carry trays…” he grinned, “I’d like to have a little conversation with you.”_

_“No… I… really have to go.” Trying to pull her wrist free from his grip, Nera fought down panic. She gasped then when he used that grip on her to pull her around and press her back up against the wall, blocking her with his own body. “Please…”_

_“No need to be afraid,” he grinned, “I just want to talk…”_

_“I need to go…”_

_“Don’t be rude.” The grin was gone now, and in its place an indignant frown. “We’re going to have a pleasant chat.”_

_“I…” Nera tried to duck around him, only to be blocked and pushed back against the wall again. She gave a startled squeak, tucking her wings in tightly to avoid damage, and she swallowed the small scream of panic. He pressed closer, and Nera tried to shrink away, make herself small, but she was trapped against the wall. Suddenly, he was pulled back away from her and he hit the opposite wall with such force that she was sure she heard bones break._

_“Don’t fucking touch her.” Eris’ voice held barely controlled rage, but Nera had never been more pleased to hear it._

_“I… wasn’t doing anything wrong.”_

_“That’s not what it looked like to me.” Eris snarled._

_“She’s just a servant.” The reply was petulant, “She’s meant to do what she’s told.”_

_Nera shrieked then when the large male, who had only moments ago been pressing her back against the wall, was suddenly consumed by flames. They engulfed him within seconds and he barely had time to give a scream of his own before he collapsed in a charred and smoking heap in the middle of the hallway. She looked at Eris then, flames alive in his amber eyes, and she couldn’t help a step back away from him when he turned those eyes on her. Hurt flashed in those eyes then, and Nera turned away as a sob escaped her. She found herself instead sliding down the wall, her hands coming up to her face as she tried to hold in further sobs. She had known who and what Eris was, but she hadn’t seen any of that kind of violence within him before. Tales half whispered around the Court had always seemed as if they had been about someone else, not the gentle Lord she’d spent countless nights with now, talking about any topic they could come up with, and sharing hopes for the future._

_“Nera…” his voice was gentle now, but she found herself unable to move. “Nera, please… I… I’m sorry…”_

_She just nodded, unable to even look up at him. Footsteps echoed up the hallway then, and they both remained where they were as those footsteps drew closer and closer._

Elain knew that her jaw had dropped, seeing what had happened in this hallway not five minutes before. She looked at Nera carefully, touching her shoulder with a gentle hand, and then   
lifting her gaze to Eris who stood nearby, watching them both with wary eyes. “Ah…” Elain pushed what she had found out to Lucien who glanced at her to let her know that he’d seen and understood. “Why don’t you come with me…” Elain said to Nera who didn’t so much as blink by way of response. “Eris can talk to his brother… but you and I might find somewhere nicer to talk. Perhaps a garden…”

Nera nodded then and Elain resisted a relieved sigh. She slid her hand under the other female’s elbow and helped her to her feet.


	218. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighteen

**Chapter 218**

The breeze was pleasant out in the courtyard, and Elain watched the trees sway. The multicoloured leaves fluttered prettily, their gentle tinkling like bells was soothing and she turned her eyes on Nera who sat in front of her, head down. 

“Nera…” she said softly, and the other female lifted her head to meet her eyes. 

“How do you know my name?”

Elain paused for a moment. “Oh… I…” she couldn’t tell her she had been seeing some of Eris’ memories in visions. That would be weird. “I know you’re important to Eris…”

“Oh.”

Elain nodded, pleased that her answer had been enough. “Are you alright?” Nera was silent for several moments, and then bit her lip. Elain watched her and moved around to sit on the seat beside her. “Are you hurt?”

“No…”

“You’re… scared?”

“I don’t know.” Nera murmured, “Eris…” Her dark eyes closed, and Elain could see her shudder. “He just _destroyed_ that male…”

“And that frightens you?”

Nera looked at her as if she were a youngling who hadn’t understood what had been said to her. “One moment he was there, and the next he was a charred pile on the floor. Eris barely blinked.” 

“He frightened you.”

“I… I have never seen him like that before.”

“And you didn’t like being reminded that he is capable of things like that?”

“I…” Nera frowned, twisting her hands together. Elain reached out to lay one of her own hands on the other female’s shoulder. “It doesn’t seem to match who he is in my mind.” 

“Who is he in your mind?”

“He’s… clever and thoughtful… he’s soft-spoken and he likes having freedom to be himself when he doesn’t have to be who everyone else expects him to be.” Nera spoke slowly, as if trying to put it all together in her mind as she said the words aloud to Elain. 

“And that doesn’t mix with what you saw him do today?” Elain rubbed Nera’s shoulder, “Do you know why he did it?”

“Because of what that male was trying to do…”

“So Eris was protecting you?”

“Yes.”

“And doesn’t that fit with who you thought he was?”

Nera frowned again then, “I…”

“You didn’t see him as someone who would protect those he cares for?” Elain didn’t miss Nera’s dark eyes flicking directly to her at those words. Evidently Nera hadn’t been aware of the fact that others knew that Eris cared for her, or that he did at all. 

“Protect… sure…” there was a pause then, “Incinerate someone without warning…? I… don’t know.” 

Elain smiled gently, “You know how territorial males can get.” She watched Nera for a moment, “Are you afraid of what Eris can do?” she asked, “Is that what frightens you, or is it that he would do that to protect _you_.” 

“Are you asking if he scares me, or the… relationship…?”

“I suppose so.”

“Maybe both.” Nera breathed her response and Elain rubbed her shoulder again. 

“That is understandable.” She said, “… you don’t think that he would hurt you, do you?”

“I… I don’t know.” Translucent wings shuddered, and Elain watched them with fascination. “To have that kind of reaction without warning… what if I were to make him angry?”

*

Lucien stood against the wall, silent. He watched Eris pace back and forth, muttering to himself and raking his fingers through his red hair and down over his face. Back and forth and back and forth. Eventually, Eris turned to face him and Lucien could read the frustration all over his brother’s face. There was something beyond that, too. Mixed in with the frustration, he could see regret and fear. “What have I done?” Eris asked, and Lucien was surprised at the softness of the words. 

“What do you mean?”

“She’s afraid of me.”

“Nera?”

“Yes.”

Lucien just nodded his understanding, thinking of the way the female faerie had been crouched against the wall, unmoving with her face hidden in her hands. “She saw you do that to… whoever that had been?”

“Some bastard.” Eris muttered, “He deserved it.”

“But she saw it…?”

“Yes…” Eris turned away, his hands moving through his hair again as he tugged on it. “Fuck.”

“What happened?” Lucien asked, wondering what exactly had gone on in that hallway. 

“That bastard had her cornered…” Eris snarled, “He thought that because she’s a house servant that she had to do whatever he told her to do.”

“I see…”

“I… I haven’t completely … eradicated that kind of thought and behaviour from the Court…” Eris turned back to face him, “It will take a while.”

“I imagine it would.” Lucien nodded, “That kind of thing is cultural. It could take decades.”

“That’s too long.” Eris said, his teeth bared in a snarl, “I will be making everyone aware of what happened to that prick, and why.”

“That you killed him for touching your…” Lucien hesitated, “… lover?”

Eris paled as he looked at him, “For abusing a member of my household.”

“I see.”

Eris turned around again, pacing back and forth once more. “I need to speak with her.”

“Do you think that’s wise?” Lucien asked, trying to keep his voice gentle. Eris looked at him over his shoulder. “Maybe she needs some time to process that…?”

“I need her to know that I was just protecting her.”

“You don’t think she knows that already?”

Eris looked worried, and Lucien was actually surprised to see that expression on his brother’s face. This entire conversation seemed like a collection of firsts. He didn’t think he had ever seen Eris this way before. Usually, his brother was as stoic and put together as one could be. Here he was, just about unravelled. 

“I don’t want her to think that I would ever hurt her.”

“Alright…” Lucien nodded. “Do you want me to organise the clean-up in the hallway?”

“Yes.” Eris waved a hand, “I’m sure we will come across someone.”

“Okay… Elain would have taken her to one of the nearby courtyards.” Lucien moved for the door and opened it. He turned to watch his brother as Eris just looked at him, and the fear was clear on his face again. “Come on…” Lucien tried to keep his voice encouraging and gentle. After a moment, Eris moved forward and followed him out the door. 

The entire walk to the closest courtyard was silent. Eris was walking beside him, spine straight and face set in a familiar courtly mask. “Do you think she will listen to me?”

“If she cares about you.” Lucien said, “But you have to show her that you’re being genuine. You have to show her how you feel and that you’re afraid she might pull away from you. You have to let her see who you are…”

The look Eris gave Lucien then made Lucien smile to himself, and he tried to keep his face turned away. Eris looked utterly terrified, and Lucien was certain that this would actually be good for his brother.

They passed one of the kitchen servants not long later and Lucien told her that there was something that needed cleaning where they had just come from. Eris remained quiet while Lucien explained what needed to be done, and then they were walking again. As they came to the courtyard, Eris was running his hands through his hair again, and Lucien was actually kind of impressed that his brother hadn’t turned and run away. “Just be honest.”


	219. Chapter Two Hundred and Nineteen

**Chapter 219**

When Lucien and Eris approached herself and Nera from across the courtyard, Elain slowly got to her feet, making space beside Nera. Her gaze flicking between her mate and his brother, Elain took in the worried expression upon Eris’ face, and the somewhat bemused expression on Lucien’s. Reaching for the bond, Elain brushed lightly against it, just enough to pick up what Lucien was so amused by. Apparently he had never seen Eris so ruffled like this, and Lucien found it intriguing. Elain supposed it must be as this was completely unlike the Eris she had thought she’d begun to understand just a little. She couldn’t imagine having an image she’d built over centuries shattered like this. Lucien seemed amused by his ideas being changed, whereas Nera was still uncertain and somewhat afraid. 

“Nera…” Eris sounded hesitant as he reached them, and his amber eyes locked onto Nera who was still sitting with her head down. Elain was surprised by the gentleness and uncertainty of his voice and she couldn’t help watching him as his eyes remained on Nera, waiting for her to acknowledge him. He took a small step toward her, then stopped, his back straight and his hands clasped firmly together before him. It appeared as if he were warring within himself as to whether he should approach her or not. Those amber eyes didn’t move from the female sitting before him and, after a moment during which Elain saw several emotions flicker across his face, Eris slowly sank to his knees. 

Nera looked up then, Elain’s gaze flicked to her almost instantly, and she watched surprise and disbelief cross that pretty face. Nera’s dark eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. “… What are you doing?” she breathed, those eyes flicking around the courtyard for a moment before returning to Eris. “Someone might see…”

Elain glanced around the courtyard herself, then. Nobody was out here but them, although that didn’t guarantee it would stay that way. Lucien moved toward her an instant later, taking one of her hands in his own as his fingers traced the back of her hand carefully. They both watched the scene before them with interest. 

“I need you to listen to me…” Eris breathed, looking up at Nera who was still watching him with wide eyes. 

“Get up…” Nera sounded almost scared, “You’re the High Lord. You can’t be kneeling before me…”

“I will once you hear what I need to tell you.” He may have been kneeling on the ground, but Eris sounded as sure and commanding as always with those words, and Nera stopped protesting and set her own hands in her lap as she just looked at him expectantly. Elain glanced up at Lucien who looked just as surprised as Nera at what was taking place before them. As if sensing her gaze, he turned his head to meet her eyes and he raised a questioning eyebrow at her. Elain knew that he was asking about Eris’ current behaviour, but Elain didn’t know what to tell him and so she shook her head. They both then looked back to the others. 

“You killed him…” 

“I…” Eris lowered his gaze, his eyes shifting to focus on the ground before him. “I lost control…” he murmured, “Just for an instant.”

“And killed someone.”

Looking back up, then, Eris nodded. “Yes.” He said, “I did. But I would like to explain…”

Elain looked quickly at Nera, half expecting her to tell him that she didn’t want to hear it. Nera, however, nodded and remained silent, giving Eris the space to say whatever it was that he needed to. 

“I… I’ll not deny that I panicked when I saw he had you cornered like that…” he began, amber eyes lifting to Nera’s face and remaining there as he spoke. “I wanted him off you… and to stay that way. I… what he said made it clear that he wasn’t going to leave you alone. The moment I was gone and nobody was watching him, he would have come for you again. He believed that was his right. That was the kind of Court that Beron ran and it is not how my Court will be. The change may be slow, but it will happen. I would have ended up bringing him before the Court and passing my judgement on him there, and it would have been the same. I need to make an example of those like him who think that they can do whatever they like with whoever they feel they outrank. I could not let an assault on a member of my household stand. So, even in front of the Court I would have delivered that sentence and had it carried out… I… I should have done that.” He nodded slowly, “I should have done it the right way… but hearing him say that… knowing that he thought he had a right to you… I lost control… I… I am sorry that I frightened you.” A kind of pleading expression worked its way onto Eris face as he continued to look up at Nera. “Please don’t be afraid of me. I would never harm you… I… I could never do that. Please…”

“Is that what you’re afraid of?” Nera asked softly, and Eris nodded. 

“Yes.” He replied, “You…” he flicked a glance Lucien’s way before looking back to Nera once more, “you are the only one who… talks to me like I… like I am just me…” Elain could actually see Eris struggling to swallow, “I need that…” he bit his lip, “I need you… I don’t want to lose you.” 

Elain watched with disbelief and awe, her eyes following Nera as the other female got to her feet and moved slowly toward the High Lord still kneeling on the ground. “Don’t you?”

“Nobody knows me like you do.” He said, his voice barely more than a whisper, “I swear on everything I am that I would never hurt you, Nera. Please… please say that you’re not afraid of me.”

Elain squeezed Lucien’s hand slightly when Nera reached Eris and went down on her own knees before him so that they were eyelevel with one another. “You killed a high-ranking High Fae male for wanting to take liberties with a lesser fae house servant.”

“No…” Eris sounded almost choked, “I killed a male for touching _you_ and thinking that he had the right to.”

Elain thought that she’d stopped breathing when Nera lifted one of her fine-boned hands and set it to Eris’ cheek. “I hadn’t realised that you were so territorial.”

“You hadn’t?” he asked, a half-smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Maybe you should sit in on one of the next meetings of the High Lords.”

“Oh, I knew you would be about your Court.” Nera smiled warmly at him, “I just didn’t realise that I was part of your territory…”

“Oh…” Doubt flickered across Eris’ face, dulling the light that had appeared in his amber eyes for a moment, “… are… sorry… I shouldn’t have assumed… I… are you not…?”

“Ah…” Nera’s smile brightened as she leaned in a pressed her lips to his carefully. “I am.”


	220. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty

**Chapter 220**

Music swirled around the throne room, and Elain stood against the wall. Her eyes swept the room, taking in the gorgeous autumn colours of the decorations that had been put up for the occasion. It wasn’t Mabon, that had passed, but it seemed as if all of the Court were here and prepared to celebrate. She watched as couples swept around the dancefloor, all of the pretty dresses swirling around as if dancing to the music themselves. There were so many here, and Elain wasn’t entirely sure she had seen all of them before. She and Lucien were scheduled to leave the Autumn Court the next morning, and Eris had announced that he would throw a farewell celebration to thank them for their visit. Helion would be leaving and heading back to the Day Court while Elain and Lucien would be moving on to the Winter Court. She hadn’t expected the farewell to be this elaborate, but it appeared that Eris had spared no detail. 

Lucien hadn’t arrived yet, and Elain leaned back against the wall as she watched the room. Nesta and Cassian were present and currently over the other side of the room by the long table which held refreshments. Elain could see Cassian gesturing at the dance floor, and Nesta’s flat expression as she clearly rejected his apparent suggestions to dance. Smiling to herself, Elain resisted a laugh. Cassian was going to need to be far more persuasive if he hoped to get Nesta dancing with him without a good deal of wine in her. Then, making a mental note to herself, Elain resolved to find the time this evening to ask Nesta what she was doing when she left here. She wanted to ask her sister if she were planning to return to the Night Court right away. When Elain had first gone to the Winter Court she had thought how Nesta would love the entire place; she had even told Nesta that she needed to visit there one day. Perhaps, Elain reasoned, Nesta would like to visit the Winter Court with herself and Lucien instead of rushing back to the Night Court. 

Her gaze sliding from Nesta and Cassina, Elain continued to look around the hall. Eris was sitting on his throne on the dais, and Elain grinned widely when she saw Nera step up and move toward him. Instantly, Eris went from lounging casually to sitting up straight and the look on his face would have left nobody guessing as to his appreciation of Nera as she approached. Elain had not seen Nera wear anything so fine before, but she looked lovely in the silken dress of pale orange. It suited her skin in a most flattering and complimentary way, and Elain was instantly certain that Eris had been the one to have the dress given to her. 

When Nera reached Eris, the High Lord got to his feet. Elain noticed that at least half of the Court was watching the pair up on the dais, although nobody was making it all that obvious, and the murmuring began when Eris took Nera’s hand and began leading her down onto the dancefloor. More than a few of Eris’ courtiers stopped what they were doing to watch, then. Eris ignored the lot of them, his eyes remaining on Nera and he turned her around to face him in the centre of the room. Elain just watched them, her grin wide, as Eris stepped closer to Nera, slipping one of his arms around her waist and drawing her in closer to himself, before beginning to lead her in a slow and graceful dance. It was beyond clear to everyone with eyes that the High Lord was in love. 

“I guess he chose the risk.” Lucien’s voice was low in Elain’s ear and she leaned into him. One of his arms went around her shoulder, and she felt his lips at her temple a moment later. “She must be supremely important to him.”

“Just look at his face, Lucien.” Elain murmured, her eyes still on Eris and Nera. “He loves her.”

“Yes.” Lucien agreed, his voice soft. “Wonders never cease.”

Elain looked up at Lucien then, “Can you hear what people are saying?”

“They mostly sound confused.” He paused for a moment, and she could tell that he was listening to the room. “A bit scandalised, too.”

“Yes.”

“It’ll be good for them.” He said a moment later, “Some of them need to think a little differently.” There was no humour in Lucien’s voice now, just a simple statement of fact.

“Do you truly think they will support him, or do you think that he’s just put his throne at risk?”

“I think,” Lucien mused, “It will depend on how strong the rest of Eris’ reputation is. He’s always kind of been known for cruelty and for being ruthless… and whether it was an act for Beron’s benefit or not, it may be what saves him now.”

“Ah…” Elain looked back to where Nera was happily moving around the dancefloor with Eris, and she hoped that it wouldn’t be the High Lord’s lover who bore the brunt of whatever was about to come their way. Eris had been there when Jesminda had been executed for loving Lucien, though. Surely he would have considered that she may be a target and he would do whatever was necessary to protect her. 

“Dance with me, Petal?”

“Oh…” Elain smiled up at her mate when he took one of her hands and drew her away from the wall. “Of course…” Lucien grinned at her, his eyes moving over her in a way that suggested he would be after a different kind of dance later, and Elain allowed him to guide them onto the dancefloor. Nobody was really paying them any attention as most of the room was still watching Eris and Nera. This suited Elain just fine as she still wasn’t a fan of getting too much attention. 

“I have enjoyed our visit to the Autumn Court.” Lucien told her, and Elain tilted her head back so that she could look up at his face. 

“I am glad, love.”

“We should make it a routine thing, coming back here every so often…”

“I would like that. So, I would think, would your mother…”

“Yes.” Lucien nodded, and Elain saw him look up and around the room. “I haven’t seen her this evening…”

“I don’t think she’s arrived yet…”

“She probably won’t.” Lucien said after a moment, and Elain frowned at that. 

“Why not?” she asked, and Lucien lifted an eyebrow as he looked down at her. “… Well, Helion is set to leave tomorrow too…”

“Oh…” Elain nodded, figuring that Ashk and Helion were probably trying to make the most of the time they had left together. “I see…”

“Let’s hope we don’t.” Lucien muttered, and Elain couldn’t help cracking a smile, “Once was more than enough.” He gripped Elain firmly by the hips then, turning her, and spinning in time to the music, and Elain gave a laugh as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, holding tightly as she laughed again.


	221. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-One

**Chapter 221**

Lucien’s fingers brushed across the garnet necklace Elain wore, and she looked up to meet his eyes. It had been a while since she had seen such heat there as he held her gaze, his other hand firm against her lower back as they continued to move to the music still swirling around the hall. Faeries moved around them, all dancing and swaying, and Elain barely even noticed them.

“I wish we were not in a room full of others…” Lucien’s voice was low, and Elain could hear a rough edge to it which suggested he was trying to contain something. 

“As do I, love.”

“Ah…” His fingers moved across the necklace again, and Elain couldn’t look away from his searing gaze. “I love this on you.” He murmured, “It truly looks as if it were made for you…” he smiled then, and Elain’s heart did a little flutter, “It was made for my mate… so I suppose it was… but it seems as if it were made with you in mind. It suits _you_.”

“Oh…” Elain lifted one of her own hands, bringing it up to rest against Lucien’s where it sat against the garnet. “It is actually something I would have chosen for myself.”

“How perfect.” Lucien smiled, and he leaned forward to press a kiss to her forehead, “Doesn’t this just prove, yet again, how perfect you are for me?”

“Yes…” Elain went up on her toes, wrapping both of her arms around Lucien’s neck. She had a sudden thought then and she smiled at him, “Would you show me your old room again?” 

“If you like…”

“Yes…” Elain thought about the last time she had seen it. It had also been the first time. Lucien had taken her up to his old room, from when he had used to live in the Autumn Court during their first visit here. That had been where he had found the Garnet necklace hidden where he had left it all those years ago. She had also had several visions of Lucien as a youngling as he had grown and changed, and then eventually left the Court. That had been when she had first kissed him of her own accord. She would, Elain decided, like to visit it again.  
Lucien’s eyes lifted then, and she watched him sweep the room with his gaze. Then, he looked back down to her, his hand pulling her closer with a hand at her back. “Do you want to do it tonight?”

“Now?” She asked, and he nodded. 

“Things are wrapping up here…”

“True.” Elain flicked her own eyes around the room. Cassian and Nesta were gone, as were Eris and Nera. She hadn’t seen Ashk or Helion, but she was pretty certain that she knew what they would be doing. “Let’s go, then.”

Elain held tightly to Lucien’s hand as he led her through the house and up toward his old bedroom. When he pushed the door open and let her in, Elain looked around and came to the conclusion that nobody had been in here since the last time they had closed the door. Lucien had followed Elain into the room, and she felt him hot at her back when he reached her. Both of his hands came to rest on Elain’s waist and she leaned back into him, smiling when he bent to press a kiss to the side of her throat. “Who would have thought that I’d one day have my mate up in here like this…?”

“Surely you did.” Elain replied, “That’s why you had this made…” She touched the Garnet necklace. 

“Perhaps some part of me knew.” He used his grip on her hips to turn her around, and Elain wrapped her arms around him once more. “Just like those daydreams I used to have… that must be why it’s so very suited to you.” His lips brushed her forehead, and Elain tilted her head back to allow him access to her lips. Lucien pulled her more tightly to himself, and then sought to deepen the kiss and Elain parted her lips for him almost instantly. Lucien groaned as he pushed forward, his hands tightening on her, pulling her against himself, as he moved closer. After a moment or two of that, Elain felt the wooden frame of the bed hit the back of her knees, and she lost her balance more a moment before recollecting it just as Lucien pushed her a little further. 

She ended up on her back on Lucien’s old bed, and then he was kneeling over her, his hands pulling at her dress. Elain’s heartbeat escalated quite quickly, and she could hear Lucien’s in her head doing just the same thing. “Is this what you want?” she asked him, although she could feel that it was. 

“Yes…” his response was panted, and the sound went straight between Elain’s legs. She drew one deep breath after another, trying to get herself to a point where breathing was easy, but then Lucien’s hands were on her again and she gave a breathy moan, unable to hold it in any longer.


	222. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Two

**Chapter 222**

On her back, Elain let her gaze travel over the top of the four poster bed, taking in the oranges and reds. Her breath was coming more and more quickly as Lucien’s hands traced over her, his fingers brushing against her skin in the lightest way, sending shivers over her body. The wooden posts of the bed were carved to look like the trunks and branches of the trees and the red and orange curtains appeared to be leaves. The room was beautiful, and Elain understood why Lucien seemed to have attempted to somewhat recreate it in his space at the Spring Court. This was where he had grown up, where he had been formed into who and what he was. 

When Lucien got Elain’s dress off enough to pull it from her and toss away, she gave a small sigh, stretching out across the dark brown bedspread. He was on her again in an instant, hands ghosting over her skin once more as he bent his head to press a kiss to her lips. She smiled into that kiss, meeting his eyes for an instant before he began to move down her body. Elain’s breath caught in her throat at the look in Lucien’s eyes and on his face. She could feel the possessiveness coming off of him in waves.

“Are you okay?” she breathed, wondering what had sparked this in him. The smirk he gave her set her blood alight an instant later, and she gasped when he lowered his lips to her stomach. Elain went to touch him, lifting a hand to his vibrant hair, but Lucien took hold of both of her wrists and held them firmly to the bedspread. Unable to move, Elain arched her back when she felt Lucien’s hot tongue on her skin “Ugh… _Lucien_ …” He didn’t reply, only moving lower over her, his hands still firm around her wrists. Letting out a small whine, Elain closed her eyes when Lucien’s tongue traced up the inside of one of her thighs. 

When he released her wrists, Elain’s arms flung out wide and she gripped the heavy bedspread, able to feel the golden thread of the embellished leaves. Lucien’s hands went to her thighs and he slid them down and around beneath her, lifting her slightly and Elain felt her heart quicken again when those hands then moved down her thighs once more, holding her open. “ _Lucien_ …” she breathed, then letting out a small squeal when he gripped her thighs tightly and his hot mouth descended on her. “ _Lucien! Oh_!” Letting out another shriek, Elain gripped the bedspread tightly, her back arching again while Lucien held her thighs wide as his tongue licked at her again and again. “ _Fuck_ …” Suddenly he pushed his tongue into her, and Elain gave a wordless cry. Her back arched off of the bed, and Lucien clutched at her, holding her firmly so that she couldn’t get away as he continued exactly what he had been doing with his tongue. Tremors shook her and she clenched handfuls of the bedspread, trying to keep still as her body jerked and her hips lifted from the bed again and again, “ _Fuck… Fuck… oh_ …”

Before she had reached her edge, Lucien lifted his head and released her thighs. Elain lay panting and trying to catch her breath as he moved up over her body once more, his lips tracing her skin lightly as he went. She gave a soft groan when she felt his hot kiss at her throat and his weight settled over her. One of Lucien’s hands went into her hair and an instant later he had taken hold of a handful of her hair, gripping tightly. “Do you want me?” his words were growled into Elain’s ear, and heat flushed through her. 

“Yes…” she panted, her legs opening for him again as he rocked against her, “Oh… yes…” Hooking one of her feet behind Lucien’s knee, Elain tried to lift herself to meet him more completely, but his free hand was on her hip, holding her pinned to the mattress. He lifted his head then, bringing his lips from her throat to her chin and cheek and then her nose. Lucien met her eyes then, and Elain gasped at the possessive look there. His hand tightened in her hair, and the other at her hip, and Elain gasped again when he used one of his knees to push her legs further apart. Again, she wondered what had done this to him. He hadn’t been like this before they had entered his old room and, as her eyes swept the room again, Elain wondered if it was being in here. Was it something to do with being in this place?

Reaching for the bond, Elain tried to read what she felt swirling around inside of Lucien. He wanted her. She could feel that. Something deep within him was driving him to have her, to possess her. Here. In this room. On this bed. “Lucien…” she whispered, and he pressed his lips to hers, scorching and demanding as she parted her lips for him. “Mmm…” She could feel him pressed against her, hot and ready, and Elain tried again to lift her hips to him. It was being in this room that had had this effect on him, she realised. This was his space. The space that had been only his, where he had grown and become who he was, and now that he was back in here, he wanted to have his mate on his bed. “Lucien…” she breathed, eyes closed as his lips moved back down her throat, “Have you had anyone else up here?” She wanted to ask about Jesminda, but didn’t want to say his old lover’s name, not in this place and in this moment.

“No…” his breath was hot in the hollow of her throat, and Elain just nodded by way of acknowledgement. He lifted his head once more to meet her eyes, and Elain’s breath caught once more at the fire within. “Only my mate…” 

Sliding one hand down Lucien’s back, Elain brought the other around to his cheek, holding his gaze as he looked down at her. Recalling how he had been possessive of her in his room in the Spring Court, Elain understood why he would be more so here. He had lived here longer, and this place had been a part of his formation. It made sense that the drive to have her here would be stronger and more primal. “Mate…” she whispered, “I am here… Have me…”

A slight growl was the only response that Lucien gave before his hand on her hip gripped her more tightly, and Elain gave a low groan as he pushed himself completely inside of her with one fluid movement. The hand that had been at Lucien’s cheek slipped down to his shoulder and Elain clutched at him as he began to thrust steadily into her. “Uh… Uh… Yes…”

“Is that okay?” he asked, voice barely more than a whisper, and Elain nodded quickly. “Good…” his hand from her hip moved down to hook behind one of her knees, and Elain groaned again when he lifted that knee up over his elbow, increasing the pace of his thrusting as he did so, his other hand still tight in her hair. 

“ _Lucien_ …” Elain could do nothing more than pant his name, unable to so much as move, as her mate held her in place, grunting with his own efforts as he thrust into her body again and again. “ _Lucien_ …”

“Yes, Petal…” his voice sounded rough, but he held Elain’s eyes as he moved over her, hand gripping her hair even more tightly now. A moment later, he’d used that hold on her hair to pull her head to one side, exposing much of her throat to him, and then his hot mouth was on that sensitive skin. Elain shuddered as she felt his teeth graze her throat, and her eyes closed as his thrusting into her became more and more erratic. She could tell he was nearing his own edge, and the thought sent heat and desire coiling through her own body. She whimpered as she felt herself tumbling toward that bliss, and Lucien just continued exactly what he had been doing, pushing her closer and closer. “ _Elain_ …”

“Mmmm….”

“ _Elain_ …”

“ _Ah_!” Her hips were moving of their own accord now, lifting to meet Lucien’s steady rhythm, and she clutched at him more tightly, “ _Ahh_ …” she whimpered, scratching at his back, eyes squeezed shut, “ _Ahh_!” 

They were moving in sync, holding tightly to one another, breath mingling together and breathing one another in when Elain reached her edge and fell with a shriek. She pressed her face into Lucien’s shoulder, her teeth sinking into his skin as she shook, and she felt him holding her tightly, pulling on her hair when he gave a cry of his own and followed her off of that edge.


	223. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Three

**Chapter 223**

Lucien dropped his pack by the door, eyes on Elain’s back as she stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame as she peered out into the hallway. His mate had said nothing about what had happened in his old room earlier and he wasn’t sure how she felt about it. He knew that he had been intense, and that he had lost himself a little in wanting to touch her, kiss her, and his need to then be inside of her. He knew that he hadn’t exactly been gentle, but he also knew that she liked that. She had asked him if he had been alright, and he knew that he hadn’t exactly given her an answer. At the time he hadn’t been sure what he was feeling, only that he’d needed to have her then and there. 

Once they had left his old room and he had had the time to think about how he had been, Lucien had felt a little guilty. He wanted to discuss it with her, but she hadn’t brought it up so he figured that he maybe had to be the one to do it. “… Petal?” he began, and Elain glanced over her shoulder at him. Lucien wasn’t sure what his face was saying, but upon seeing him, she turned around and he could see the interest in her eyes. 

“Yes?”

“I…” he didn’t know what he actually wanted to say to her, and fell silent. Elain took a few steps toward him, and he reached a hand out to her, relieved when she took it, linking their fingers together. 

“Yes, love?” She moved even closer, and Lucien couldn’t help looking her over. Her hair was still slightly messy from earlier, and it didn’t appear that she had thought to fix it up yet. “Is something the matter?” Elain lifted his hand, in hers, to her chest, pressing it firmly to herself. “Love?” Her dark eyes were looking him over in an almost assessing manner, and Lucien couldn’t help but smile at her concern. 

“Do you want to sit?” he asked, glancing at the couch nearby, and Elain nodded and moved with him. They sank down beside one another, and Lucien wrapped a arm around her shoulders, wanting to keep her close. “I…” he let out a sigh, not knowing how to even begin. Figuring that he would just begin to talk, and see where it led him, he drew a shaky breath before he continued. “I wanted to talk to you about earlier.”

“In your old room?” she asked, and he nodded. Elain just looked at him, an expectant expression on her face as she waited for him to continue. 

“Yes…” Lucien stroked her hand, “I… I’m sorry if it was…” he made a face, “I don’t know. I didn’t intend for that to happen. It just kind of happened when we got up there. Something in me just… needed… you…”

“It’s okay.” Elain replied, smiling at him. “It was like what happened when you had me in your room in the Spring Court.”

“Was it?” he asked, eyes narrowing slightly at he tried to remember. 

“Yes.” Elain said, “It makes sense, really.”

“Does it?”

“Mhm…” her fingers moved carefully over his wrist and up his forearm, and Lucien shuddered lightly, “That was your space, and having me in it made you possessive…”

“I… suppose so.”

“Your old room was the same thing.” She went on, “But maybe more so.” 

“Ah…” Lucien thought about that, and decided within a matter of seconds that Elain was correct. It had hit him almost instantly when they had gone through that door into his old room. It had smelled a little mustier than it had used to, but that old familiar scent had been there. It had been his. His space. His home. Then, Elain’s scent had hit him, and sparked something within him. He’d needed to get his hands on his mate, and nothing else could have held his attention until he had. “You’re right…” he told her. “I think that’s exactly what happened.”

Elain scooted closer to him on the couch and he blinked when one of her gentle hands came up to his cheek. “You don’t have to worry about being possessive with me.” She said, her fingers caressing his jaw. “I am yours.” She gave him a bit of a twisted smile then, and Lucien’s blood quickened in his veins, “Any time you want me.”

“Oh, Petal.” He grinned, “If you go saying things like that, we’re going to get ourselves into all kinds of trouble.” He had a brief mental image of himself pulling her down onto the floor in the hall before Helion’s throne in the Day Court, his hands moving up under her dress as she moaned his name, and he swallowed thickly, hoping that what he had thought didn’t show on his face. Elain’s smile widened as she looked at him, and Lucien wondered if she had seen anything of what he’d imagined down the bond. Clearing his throat, Lucien glanced toward the door. “Are… uh… are Nesta and Cassian coming to the Winter Court?”

“Nes is.” She said, her own dark eyes shifting toward the door. “Have you spoken with Helion or your mother yet?”

“No,” Lucien held Elain’s hand in his own. “Helion will meet us downstairs as we are leaving…” He felt her shift then and he released her to allow her to get to her feet. He followed a moment later, knowing that they were expected downstairs. They were due to leave for the Winter Court before the hour was over, anyway. “Yeah, let’s go…”

He had picked up both his pack, and Elain’s, and they were headed downstairs while he tried to think about what he would say to his mother. He had spent so very long without her, but being able to see her so frequently recently had changed something within him, and he hated the idea of being separated from her now. It saddened him to think that he might not see her for weeks or months, and when Elain glanced at him over her shoulder, he knew that she had been able to feel that down the bond. Allowing his eyes to move over his mate, Lucien tried to let the view distract himself. His eyes fixated on Elain’s backside, and he smiled to himself. She glanced at him over her shoulder again, this time with a raised eyebrow, and he gave her a wink by way of reply. She was definitely reading him down the bond. There was no question about it. 

Most of the Court was waiting in the hall when he and Elain reached the room, and Lucien noticed that Eris was not sitting in his throne, but rather on the edge of the dais. His brother was chatting animatedly to Helion and Lucien felt his jaw drop slightly. Nera sat next to Eris, and Lucien watched as the High Lord took one of her brown hands in his own pale hand, holding gently, yet in full view of the entire Court. The whispering was still there, Lucien realised, but not nearly as loudly as before.

“Ah,” Eris said, his eyes shifting to Lucien and Elain. “Time for everyone to leave.”


	224. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Four

**Chapter 224**

Lucien stared at his brother, and Elain watched her mate’s face carefully. She had approached, not having heard the discussion between the two, but she had felt _something_ coming from Lucien down the bond as he had talked with the High Lord of the Autumn Court. Helion looked amused, and Elain found herself looking from one male to the next, wanting to know what was happening. She looked at Nera next, and those dark eyes just smiled back at her. 

“You did what?” Lucien asked, and Elain looked quickly to Eris, eager for the explanation. 

“Named our mother the Autumn Court’s Emissary to the Day Court.” Eris’ amber eyes told her clearly how impressed with himself he was, and she looked back to Lucien for her mate’s reaction to that news. 

“Uh…” Lucien’s jaw dropped a little as he continued to stare at his brother. “Is that what she wanted?”

“Yes.” Eris replied simply, those amber eyes focused now on Helion. 

“Is… is she to go with you?” Elain asked the High Lord of the Day Court. “Back to Day?”

“She is.” Helion’s voice was warm and she could hear the joy in it as he answered her, smiling brightly as he did so. “She has spent the morning packing.” Elain nodded, figuring that Ashk would have rather more to pack than the rest of them, considering she lived here and would be away for quite some time. Emissaries, she knew, could live in other courts for decades or centuries. Perhaps Ashk would never live in the Autumn Court again. “Lady Ashk will be most welcome in the Day Court…” Elain saw Helion turn his eyes and his smile on Lucien who was now nodding silently, and she could feel her mate’s pleasure now. The words had begun to sink in and he was realising that he wouldn’t have to say goodbye to his mother for quite some time. Reaching a hand out to him, Elain touched Lucien’s arm and he turned his head to look at her.

“She’ll be there when we go back.”

“Yes…” he smiled, “That will be wonderful.” Happiness was reaching Elain in waves down the bond then, and she couldn’t help but smile right back at him. 

“Ah… Here she is.” Eris got to his feet, then, lifting a hand in way of greeting and Elain turned to see Ashk dragging several bags across the floor. Lesser faeries hurried toward her, taking the bags and lifting them for her, and she just smiled as she straightened and turned to face her two sons. 

“I believe I have everything I need.”

“Are you sure?” Eris asked, “Well, even if you decide later that you’ve left things behind you would prefer to have with you, you need only send word and I will have them taken to you.”

“Thank you.” Ashk smiled at him and then at Lucien, “Perhaps, Lucien,” she said, “When you return to the Day Court, you will have some advice for me as an emissary…”

“I doubt I could tell you anything you don’t already know.” Lucien smiled brightly, and Elain thought he might have even stood a little straighter, “You’re the one who trained me after all.” Elain watched the way that Ashk’s gaze moved over her youngest son, and she wondered if Lucien could read the pride in his mother’s eyes. 

“I take it you are both set to leave for the Day Court when we leave for Winter?” Elain looked from Ashk to Helion and back again and the High Lord of the Day Court nodded his head. 

“Yes.” He said, his smile as bight as the sun, “As soon as the Lady is ready…” his eyes shifted from Elain to Ashk and that smile brightened even further. 

“She is ready.” Ashk sounded happier than Elain had ever heard her, and she watched the red-headed Lady bend to pick up one of her bags. As Elain slipped one of her own hands into Lucien’s holding tightly, her mate moved closer to her until she could feel his heat at her side. They both watched as Helion reached over and took the bag from Ashk’s shoulder, hoisting it over his own as lesser fae moved in to pick up the other bags. “I look forward to seeing you all soon, my loves.” Ashk smiled, her russet eyes moving from one of them to the next before she turned and followed the High Lord of the Day Court from the room. 

*

“Is Cassian not joining us?” Lucien asked, and Nesta shook her head. He glanced at Elain who was watching her sister silently. “Why not?” he asked, “Did you scare him away?”

“Uh…” Nesta raised an eyebrow at him, her chin lifting with it as she looked at him down her nose. “No, he had responsibilities in the Night Court.” She said, “Rhys has things he’s asked him to take care of.”

“Sorry, Nes…” Elain’s voice was gentle, and Nesta’s cold eyes shifted to her sister. Lucien watched the elder sister soften a little, nodding her head just a little. 

“He has seen the Winter Court.” She said, giving what he figured was meant to be a nonchalant shrug, “I have not.”

“You’ll love it.” Elain said.

“Yes,” Nesta replied, “You’ve told me that before… I am eager to see it.”

“Let’s go, shall we…?” Lucien slipped an arm around Elain’s shoulders, his fingers moving up her arm and beneath the blue cloak he had given her before the first time they had travelled to the Winter Court together. 

“Let’s.” Nesta pulled her own cloak around herself, and Lucien cast an assessing eye over it. It was one that she had gotten in the Autumn Court, and he wasn’t entirely sure it would be enough for the Winter Court. For the short trip to Kallias’ palace, sure. But, for lengthy explorations, perhaps not. 

“Here…” Lucien shifted them to the point from which they would winnow, and an instant later the icy wind hit them. Instantly, Elain burrowed into him, hiding her face against his chest, and Lucien pulled her closer. 

“Ohh…” Nesta bunded herself tightly under her thin cloak, and Lucien bit his lip. 

“Are you alright?” 

“I am perfectly fine.” Nesta replied, her eyes lifting to meet his. “Where is this palace?”

“Kallias is coming to get us.” He told her, “But we could begin walking this way…” he gestured ahead of them and Nesta set out right away. 

“Nes, don’t go too far…” Elain said, her hands sliding under Lucien’s cloak as she leaned into him. “You’ll get lost…”

Nesta looked at them over her shoulder. “I won’t go far…” she said, “But I would like to get to the palace and out of this wind. This cloak is far too thin.”

“Here…” Lucien reached out and brushed his fingers against the edge of Nesta’s coat, sending some heat into it. 

“Was that the same warming spell you put on me last time?” Elain asked, and he nodded. 

“Is that helping?” he met Nesta’s eyes again, surprised to find the look there softer than he’d ever seen directed at him. 

“Yes, thank you…”

Lucien smiled at her, retracting his hand and wrapping both arms around Elain. He tucked his mate into his cloak with him, casting the same warming spell again on the both of them. Comfort reached him down the bond from Elain as she leaned back into him and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “I think I see Kallias…” he said, eyes on the distance. “Something’s moving out there.”


	225. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Five

**Chapter 225**

When the sleigh came to a stop in the snow before them, Elain watched her sister’s reaction. Nesta took several hasty steps back, closer to Elain and Lucien as the hooded figure up in the sleigh threw back their hood. Viviane smiled down at them, her pale hair blowing in the wind. “Hello,” the Lady of the Winter Court greeted them, “It is lovely to see you all again.”

“We didn’t expect you to be the one coming to greet us.” Lucien’s voice was light and friendly, and Elain glanced up at him, remembering that the two of them had been friends for a long time. 

“I beat Kal to the sleigh when he suggested that I couldn’t.” Viviane replied, laughing slightly. “He’ll be waiting for you when we get to the palace.” Viviane’s pale eyes shifted toward Nesta. “I am so excited for you to see the Winter Court, Nesta. I’m sure you will love it.”

“So far it is very white.” Nesta replied, pulling her cloak more tightly around herself. 

“Much of it is white.” Agreed Viviane, “But that’s beautiful.” She made a gesture around them at the majesty of the white snowy fields, and then motioned for them all to get into the sleigh and she moved to make space for them. 

“Love…” Lucien slid a hand beneath Elain’s arm, shifting to help her up into the sleigh and she let him guide her, pulling herself up beside Viviane. 

“Do you still have baby reindeer?” she asked, her eyes on Viviane while Lucien went to help Nesta up into the sleigh. Elain was surprised that her sister allowed such an action when she could have managed the task herself.

“Oh… Yes.” Viviane smiled at her. “They’re still babies, but a little older than you saw.”

“Cute.” Elain turned to look at her sister, “You’ll love the baby reindeer.”

Nesta gave Elain a small smile, shuffling closer when Lucien jumped up into the sleigh with them. Elain moved out of the way to allow Nesta to sit down beside Viviane, while she settled on the bench seat beside her mate. Lucien picked up the blankets piled in under the seat and passed one to Nesta who looked very thankful as she took it and settled it around herself. 

“It’s only a short ride back to the Palace.” Viviane said to Nesta who nodded quickly. Elain leaned into Lucien, getting comfortable as she allowed her gaze to move around them. She remembered the last time they had done this trip in the sleigh; Lucien had needed to grab hold of her in order to prevent her from falling out of the sleigh as she had watched everything they passed. Watching the trees pass quickly as the wind grew stronger and the snow came down more thickly, Elain hoped that her sister found this all as beautiful as she had on her first trip, even as beautiful as she found it now. The Winter Court was truly unique and so very different from every other Court, and she had decided that she did indeed love it here.

“We should be sure to visit the Eisblume garden again,” Lucien said quietly, his lips against Elain’s ear, and she felt head fill her cheeks.

“Oh…” she breathed, remembering the last time they had gone out there, and the way that she had gone down on her knees for him in the snow. That had been the first time she had done that, and she had found it rather exciting. “We… we… do seem to enjoy… outside.” She murmured, eyes flicking up to meet Lucien’s.

“The garden…” he said softly, his russet eye thoughtful, “… and the glade…”

“Not to mention the rock pool in the Summer court and a handful of others…”

“… Apparently we do enjoy outside…” Lucien’s grin was wicked at her looked at her, and he lifted one of his hands out from beneath his cloak, bringing it to her cheek. “Would you like to choose our next outdoor adventure?”

Elain just looked at him, wondering if he realised that once they’d had sex here that would be all of the courts. She had told him once before, but she wasn’t sure that he would remember. The way that his smirk widened and heat appeared behind his russet eye told her that he did remember and she leaned into his touch as his fingers caressed her cheek. “I think I can come up with something for us to do…” she said gently, and the fire behind Lucien’s russet eye brightened. She could feel the heat within him growing hotter, both through the bond and through his fingertips. “So warm.” She murmured, and his smirk turned gentle. Lucien’s hand slid around the back of Elain’s neck as his other snaked around her waist and he drew her closer. Elain cuddled into him, enjoying that warmth as the snow swirled around them. “Don’t even need a blanket.”

“Ah…” Lucien chuckled softly, pressing his lips to Elain’s cheek, “I’m happy to warm you up whenever you need it, my love.”

“I need it all the time.” Elain murmured, smiling happily as he adjusted the hood of her cloak, settling it over her so that it could withstand the wind and keep the snow off of her. She loved when he was like this, she loved when he was protective and loving which, Elain had to admit, was all the time, but she loved when they had the time during quiet moments like this to be able to express it and be openly affectionate with one another.

“You can have it all the time.” One of his hands moved up and down her back and she smiled as she settled against him. Soaking up Lucien’s heat, Elain allowed her gaze to shift back to their surroundings and she took in the gorgeous landscape as they continued their trip to Kallias’ Palace.

When they arrived, Viviane led them into the large dining hall and Nesta made a pleased sound at the sight of all of the fires around the room. “Oh, it is so much warmer in here.” Her sister muttered, and Elain could hear Nesta’s teeth chattering. 

“We will get you a more appropriate cloak.” Viviane told Nesta, her smile wide as she ushered them across the room. 

“Ah, love.” Kallias turned to face them, his eyes going immediately to his wife, “Nearly record time.”

“Faster than you ever are, that’s for sure.” Viviane replied, smiling even wider when Kallias slipped an arm around her shoulders. 

The High Lord of the Winter Court laughed, turning his attention to his guests then. “Lucien, Elain… and Nesta.” He stood more straight, “You are welcome to the Winter Court. I would assume that you are all rather chilled, so you will be shown to the rooms we have prepared for you, and you have about two hours before dinner will be served here. Take your time to get changed and have a hot bath. You’ll feel better…” Elain noticed that his eyes were on Nesta who was still shivering as he said this last part. 

“That would be most welcome, thank you.” Lucien said and Elain nodded her agreement. 

“Yes, thank you.” She put in, her eyes on Nesta who looked more relieved than any of them.


	226. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Six

**Chapter 226**

Beside her, Nesta twisted her hands and shifted in her seat and Elain flicked a reassuring glance her sister’s way. It was evident that Nesta was unsure of her place here, as she kept looking up and down the table, fiddling with the cutlery before her, and biting her lip in a way that made her anxiousness apparent. Elain understood that, often not knowing what her own role was. When Nesta’s grey-blue eyes turned her way, Elain gave her a smile. “Are you hungry?” she asked, and Nesta nodded silently. “Good… because the food that I had here the last time we visited was really quite delicious.”

“What kind of food?” Nesta asked, and Elain had the distinct impression that her sister was looking for something with which to distract herself. 

“Well, there were lots of potato dishes and different kinds of soups.” She said, “There was a really delicious stew with lots of vegetables… oh, and there was a pork and lingonberry dish that was marvellous.”

“The pumpkin soup is a favourite of mine.” Lucien put in, and Elain nodded. “I always hope they serve it when I come here.”

“I remember that one.” Elain agreed. It had been creamy and delectable. “I saw you eat three bowlfuls of it.”

“Hey…” She felt her mate shrug beside her, “I hadn’t been here since Amarantha had locked us all down. I needed to make up for decades of depravation.” 

“Well, I hope they serve it again for you.” Elain told him, turning her head his way and sliding one of her hands across his thigh beneath the table. Lucien smiled at her, as she felt one of his own hands settle atop hers.

“As do I, Petal.”

Elain smiled at him and made a mental note to go to the kitchens and see if she might persuade whoever made the pumpkin soup to give her the recipe. She looked up when the doors to the dining hall opened and trays of food were carried in. Nesta looked around at the same time, and Elain could see her sister sitting a little straighter as they watched the dishes approach the table. 

“They certainly do smell good.” Nesta breathed, and Elain glanced at her out of the corner of her eyes. 

“They do.” Elain retracted her hand from Lucien’s thigh, and smoothed her dress down as she shuffled her chair closer to the table. Several dishes were placed within easy reach of them, and she began pointing them out to Nesta. “That’s the pork and lingonberry dish I mentioned…” she said, picking up one of the serving spoons and dishing some of it onto her own plate. “Oh…. And that looks like the stew I had last time…”

“I do like stew…” Nesta reached for the spoon sitting in the stew, and Elain flicked a glance at Lucien when she saw a pot of pumpkin soup being placed nearby. She smiled when she saw his eyes already on it.

“There you go, my love.”

Lucien gave a low chuckle, nodding. “Oh, yes.”

Another laugh sounded from further up the table, and Elain spotted Viviane watching Lucien, her laughter clear on her face as she leaned back in her seat. “Oh, Lucien.” The Lady of the Winter Court said, “You may think you’re exciting and unpredictable… but not at our tables.”

Lucien’s metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked up the table. “Consistency is not always a bad thing.”

“True…” Viviane smiled at Kallias as he sank down in a seat beside her. 

“Good evening, friends.” The High Lord said, a smile on his own face as he looked from Viviane to Lucien, Elain and Nesta. Elain watched as Kallias brushed his fingers gently up Viviane’s arm, the gesture so familiar and casual that it was as if he hadn’t even considered that others may be watching. Or, she figured, he hadn’t considered it because he didn’t care if others were watching. Perhaps, here in his own Court, Kallias and Viviane were openly affectionate with one another in front of everyone. She hoped that it was so. “In honour of your visit,” he went on, linking his fingers through his mate’s atop the armrest of the chair between them, “I have organised some entertainment for this evening.”

“Oh?” Lucien asked, “What kind of entertainment?”

“One of our finest singers,” Kallias said, “Once we have had dinner, she will perform a selection of her favourite pieces for us.”

“That sounds wonderful.” Elain said, suddenly excited by the idea. It had been longer than she could remember since she had seen a good performance. Clearly someone who was considered to be one of the Court’s finest singers by the High Lord would be superbly talented. “Thank you so much for organising something like that for us.”

“It is my pleasure.” Kallias said simply. 

Elain ate her dinner quickly. Or, as quickly as she was able considering the fact that there were several dishes nearby that she had not tried last time which she wished to sample. She had decided that the spiced potatoes were very delicious, and she spent a good amount of time trying to work out exactly which spices they were covered with. Nesta, it appeared, favoured the pork and lingonberries, and Elain noticed that Lucien ate another three bowls of the pumpkin soup before he moved on to some of the stew.

By the time dinner was over, Elain felt as if she might burst open if she moved too quickly. She watched as the table was cleared and the dishes were replaced with large pitchers of different kinds of drinks. “Please,” Kallias said, “take whatever you like for refreshment, and follow me across the hall…”

Elain filled her glass with what appeared to be iced lavender tea and she got to her feet. She waited for Nesta and Lucien before the three of them walked with Viviane toward the door and then across the grand hall to another door. The Lady of the Winter Court pushed it open and they all followed her inside. There was a small dais at the front of the room and in front of that sat row upon row of comfortable looking chairs laden with cushions.

“Please sit wherever you would like.” Viviane said, moving toward Kallias who sat at the front of the room. 

“Thank you…” Elain turned to look at Lucien who took her hand gently in one of his own. 

“Do either of you have a preference?” he asked and Elain shook her head.

“We should probably sit somewhere near the two of them.” Nesta said, nodding her head in the direction of Viviane and Kallias, “It seems the polite thing to do.”

“I agree.” Lucien lead them toward the front of the room, and they took up seats near, but not too close, to the others. 

Elain sank back into her seat between her mate and her sister. She couldn’t help the excited smile spreading across her face when the door behind the dais opened and a beautiful faerie emerged. She had hair so pale it was almost white, and skin of the palest blue. Elain’s eyes caught on the translucent wings, and she gasped softly. “Oh, my…”

Lucien squeezed Elain’s hand softly, setting it carefully in his lap as his fingers moved back and forth over her skin. Elain gave him a small smile before returning her gaze to the faerie who stood tall on the dais now. A moment later the most hauntingly beautiful voice that Elain had ever heard filled the hall and seemed to echo back at them from all around. Instantly, Elain knew, everyone in the room was spellbound. The faerie didn’t so much as move as she stood and sang for them, and Elain couldn’t help but wonder if her voice were purely vocal or if there was some magic entwined in there somewhere too. It didn’t matter, she supposed. The effect was wonderous all the same.


	227. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Seven

**Chapter 227**

Tucking a copy of her book under her arm, Elain strolled up the hallway toward the dining hall. She had told Viviane the evening before that she would be bringing her the copy of her book she had brought to the Winter Court for her the next morning, and she was pleased that she hadn’t forgotten. As she strode into the dining hall, Elain found the Lady of the Winter Court sitting at the table, a spoon halfway to her lips as their eyes met.

“Elain, did you sleep well?”

Elain thought about the way she had curled up last night around her mate and she smiled. “Oh, yes.” She replied, “We were both exhausted after that wonderful performance last night. By the time we climbed into bed, we were both ready to pass out.”

“Kal and I were the same.” Viviane said, “Although we hadn’t winnowed across half of Prythian.”

Nodding, Elain smiled. Lucien had indeed brought Nesta and herself a great distance the day before, and she hoped that he felt much rested and restored today. “I brought this for you…” She held the book out to Viviane with a flourish. 

“Oh!” Viviane’s face lit up and her slender hand reached out to take the book Elain offered. “I have so very much looked forward to getting to read this. Thank you.”

“No problem.” Elain pulled out a chair to sit beside her friend. “I did promise that I would bring you your own copy myself.”

“It’s wonderful.” Viviane smiled, running her elegant fingers across the cover and then flipping the book open. “You chose such interesting and varied flowers…”

“I tried…” Elain smiled at her, reaching for a pastry from one of the baskets in the centre of the table. 

“You’ve done a fantastic job.” 

“Thank you.” Elain took a bite of the pastry, enjoying the warm buttery flavour on her tongue. She reached for another and passed it to Nesta when her sister sank into a chair on her other side. “Try this, Nes.”

“If you insist.” Nesta took the pastry and bit into it and Elain smirked as she watched her sister’s face transform into one of blissful appreciation. “That’s nice…”

By the time Lucien had walked into the dining hall, both Elain and Nesta had finished their breakfast. As they got to their feet, he approached and reached across the table to pick up one of the pastries for himself. “That cloak looks much warmer than what you had on yesterday.” He said, and Elain watched his eyes move over Nesta. Elain hadn’t noticed the new winter outfit that her sister had on, but she did indeed look to be in much more appropriate attire with a steely grey cloak lined in grey fur. 

“Yes…” Nesta looked toward Viviane, “I meant to thank you. I appreciate it.”

“You are welcome.” Viviane said, “We couldn’t have you freezing to death while you have a look at what the Winter Court has to offer.”

“Are you ready to explore?” Elain asked her sister, and Nesta nodded her agreement. 

“I don’t think you saw the marketplace last time…” Viviane put in and Elain raised an eyebrow. She didn’t even know that the Palace had such a thing.

“That does sound fun.”

“Let’s have a look, love.” Lucien offered his arm to her and Elain took it while he lifted his pastry to his lips with the other hand. Nesta fixed her cloak around herself and came to join them. 

“Do you know where it is?” Elain asked, looking up at Lucien and he gave her a wink, chewing his pastry. 

“Sure do, sweetcakes.” He told her, having swallowed his mouthful. 

“Okay, if you two can skip the nauseating food nicknames…” Nesta muttered, hand on her hip, “Let’s go…”

Elain laughed and pulled Lucien toward the door. Behind them, Nesta followed, her footsteps quick as she moved to catch up. Lucien lead them down several corridors and a flight of stairs before they pushed open a heavy wooden door and cold air hit them instantly. 

The marketplace seemed to pule with life and the people moving up and down the street as it wound its way out of view. Silver and blue flags snapped in the breeze atop the merchants’ stalls and snow swirled gently down around them and up the wide street they found themselves in. The stalls that lined the sides of the streets, selling what looked to be all manner of wares appeared busy as fae milled around buying, selling and trading. There were fruits and vegetables piled high nearby, and next to them were cages with chickens and other small farm animals. Young boys carried flapping geese by their feet past stalls of hand-woven linens, pots of spices and hand-crafted jewellery.

Elain drew a breath and caught the scent of sweet simmering spices. She tilted her head and drew another breath, able to identify cinnamon , cloves, and cardamom. Beneath that was a little bit of citrus. Beside her, Elain saw Lucien turn his head her way. “Have you ever had Gluhwein?” Lucien’s fingers traced Elain’s arm and she shook her head. His hand tightened on her and he led her toward a nearby stall. “This is the perfect thing to sip as we wander the market.” He told her, before ordering three mugs of the delicious smelling liquid from the faerie behind the stall. 

Elain accepted the mug Lucien handed her and took a sip. She was unable to help the soft groan she made as the warm sweetness moved over her tongue. “Oh, it is delicious.” She breathed once she had swallowed. 

“Is there wine in this?” Nesta asked, eyeing her mug with narrowed eyes. 

“Not always.” Lucien replied, looking at his own mug, “But I would say this is a definite yes.” He smiled at Nesta and then Elain. “Should we wander?”

“Absolutely.” Elain agreed. 

They moved slowly through the market, ducking and weaving as fae milled around them. Merchants called out to them here and there, trying to sell their wares or even get them to stop long enough to inspect their merchandise. At some point, Elain realised that Nesta was no longer behind her and, looking around, she spotted her sister at a stall nearby inspecting woollen cloaks. Taking another sip of the Gluhwein, Elain turned back to Lucien as he took her hand in one of his. 

“This is nice…” Elain’s gaze slid to the stall they were passing and her eye caught on a silver pendant. “Oh… and this…” Elain released Lucien’s hand and reached out to touch a blue topaz cloak pin. “Do you think Nesta would like this?”

“Couldn’t say, Petal.” Lucien replied, his newly free hand shifting to her lower back, “It is very pretty…”

“I think it would go well with her eyes…”

“It would…” Lucien agreed, and Elain glanced at him to see him narrow his eyes, his attention focusing on something nearby. He leaned across the stall, touching a pair of garnet earrings, and Elain smiled. 

“They’d suit you.” She told him, her grin widening and Lucien flicked her an amused look. 

“No doubt.” He replied, “But I think they would look even better on my mate…”

“No doubt.”

Lucien chuckled and moved to get the attention of the merchant. Elain returned her attention to the cloak pin. It would, she knew, look stunning on Nesta, and it would even go well with the cloak that Viviane had given her sister. She glanced around once more, making sure that Nesta was still over at the wool stall before she resolved to get the pin and give it to her sister as a surprise. She didn’t imagine anyone had given Nesta anything like it in quite some time.


	228. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Eight

**Chapter 228**

He watched them from across the sitting room. Lucien leaned back in his comfortable seat, his eyes still on his mate and her sister. Elain and Nesta sat together on a long couch before one of the large roaring fires, and they leaned toward one another, heads bent together as they giggled over something or other. He’d had to check that it was Nesta to be sure, because she had been giggling for a few minutes now and, for a moment, he’d thought she may have been someone else. While he did want to know what it was that the two of them found so amusing, Lucien remained where he was instead of getting up and moving toward them to overhear or interject himself into their conversation. He wanted Elain to have her time with Nesta, because Lucien knew that the elder sister was not going to be returning to the Day Court with them. 

“Did you enjoy the marketplace?” 

“Yes.” Lucien turned his head to see the Lady of the Winter Court sit in the seat beside him. “It was as I remembered.”

“And Elain and Nesta?”

“I believe they liked it, too.” He smiled at his friend. “They enjoyed the Gluhwein.”

“I don’t think I’ve met anyone who has not.” Viviane grinned at him, and then folded one leg across the other. “So, tell me about how you feel being properly mated.”

“Oh… I…” Lucien bit his lip and nodded. “I feel wonderful.”

“Yes…” Viviane’s grin stretched wide, “It is wonderful, isn’t it? That connection… that certainty…”

“The certainty is…” he paused, trying to find a word good enough for what he wanted to say, “incomparable.” Lifting a hand to his hair, Lucien combed his fingers through it, back from his face, “It’s … invaluable.” He glanced across the room at Elain again, “To know… to feel the way that she feels and then actually know… not just hope, but _know_ … that she is mine.”

Viviane was nodding her head, her pale eyes on Lucien’s face. “It is beyond comparison, isn’t it?”

“It was worth every second of waiting.” He told her, “The centuries waiting to find her, and the agonising months waiting until she was ready…” his eyes went back to Elain across the room, still giggling with her sister. “It was all worth it.”

“And now you have your Mate and you are the heir to the Day Court, and Helion has made clear that you are to be his son in more than just title…” Viviane leaned back in her seat as she tilted her chin, looking at Lucien down the length of her nose, “… who would have thought?”

“Not me.” He replied, his metallic eye whirring as he looked around the room, “If you had have told me this would be my life even fifty years ago… I would have thought you were mad.”

“I am no Suriel.” She laughed a little, “If you had have told me that this would be _my_ life fifty years ago, I would have thought _you_ were mad.”

Lucien eyed Viviane, “You and Kallias have always…” he stopped, knowing that it was different. She just smiled at him and he nodded, “I cannot imagine how you felt,” he said gently, “When Amarantha attacked and he didn’t come back…”

Viviane bit her lip, and Lucien regretted bringing it up for a moment. “His message to me,” she said softly, “Was the first time he told me that he loves me…”

“And look at us now.” Lucien murmured, his eyes on Viviane’s face as her expression brightened. 

“Look at us, indeed.” She agreed.

*

As Nesta unwrapped the small package Elain had pressed into her hand, Elain’s eyes were trained on her sister’s face. She watched the curious expression there as it turned more focused, and was then replaced with delight as the topaz cloak pin was uncovered. 

“It is beautiful, Elain.”

“I am pleased that you like it.” Elain glanced down at the pin in Nesta’s hand and then looked back up to her sister’s face once more. Nesta threw an arm around her, pulling her close, and Elain leaned into the hug, wrapping her own arm around Nesta’s waist. “I thought that it would suit you. It goes well with your eyes as well as with the cloak that Viviane gave you.”

“It does.” Nesta agreed, “I even bought another wool one that is of similar hues.” Nesta’s hand shifted from Elain’s back up to her ears, and Elain felt her sister’s gentle fingers touch the earrings she wore. “These are new.”

“Lucien…” Elain smiled, “From the same stall your pin came from.”

“Your Mate appears to enjoy giving you jewellery.”

“He does.” Elain agreed, “I…” she touched the garnet necklace at her throat, “I think it serves as a visual sign of his claim on me.” She said softly, thinking of the way that Lucien would always touch the necklace in public, or when there were others around. 

“That would make sense.” Nesta agreed, “Although anyone who sees the two of you in the same room would have no doubt that you are Mates.” Elain smiled brightly at her sister, the knowledge that her bond with Lucien was so evident to others pleased her immensely. She looked at Nesta for a few more moments, wishing that he sister would someday know how that felt.

“Do you miss Cassian?”

“Uh…” Nesta blinked, her shock at the question clear on her face. “I… why would you ask that?”

“Because the two of you were practically inseparable in the Autumn Court… and you chose him at Mabon.” Elain folded her arms, keeping her voice light and easy. 

“Ah… I… do look forward to seeing him when I return to the Night Court.” 

Elain stared at her sister. She hadn’t expected Nesta to be so open about it, but she was pleased nonetheless. “I’m sure he will be looking forward to that, too.” The sly smirk that crossed Nesta’s face then surprised Elain even more, but she said nothing about it.

“There’s a reason you came here with Lucien, isn’t there?” Nesta asked, her pale eyes moving around the room, “And it was more than to bring Viviane that book…”

“We have unfinished business here.” Elain said, looking around until she found her mate. She watched Lucien talking with Viviane for a moment, and she knew that she had to come up with a plan for them. She had wanted to come here so that they could tick the last Court off of their list of places they had had sex. She wanted the Winter Court to be on that list, and she needed to come up with a plan of where and how they were going to do that. It had to be something memorable. Well, she supposed, it didn’t, but she wanted it to be. The Winter Court was beyond beautiful, and she figured that they should make it worthy of that. 

“I see.” Nesta’s flat tone suggested to Elain that her sister knew exactly what she had come for, and she threw her elder sister a sweet smile. 

“Well, I sure hope that you won’t.” She grinned and Nesta’s mouth dropped open. 

“Elain.”

Elain just smiled more widely at her sister, regretting nothing.


	229. Chapter Two Hundred and Twenty-Nine

**Chapter 229**

The sleigh raced through the snow, and Elain grew more and more excited as the falling snowflakes swirled down around herself and Lucien as the wind whipped past them. Lucien adjusted the blanket over them and one of his arms wound around her waist beneath it, encouraging her to shift closer, and that was what she did. When she rested her head against Lucien’s shoulder, and she felt how pleased he was, she smiled to herself, comfortable and happy. 

“Where is it that we are going, Petal?” Lucien sounded unconcerned, and unaffected, but Elain could feel his burning curiosity, and she smiled even more widely. 

“Oh, you will see.” 

“It’s going to be dark soon…” his voice held a small note of concern, and she tilted her head to look up at him.

“I know.” She said simply, and his metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked down at her. Elain could just about see the cogs of her mate’s mind working behind his russet eye, and she just smiled. After a moment, he nodded his acknowledgement, and she felt his arm tighten around her waist as he gave in. Elain made a small contented noise, snuggling into him beneath the blanket in the back of the sleigh.

She had spoken to Viviane earlier in the day, and she had asked the Lady of the Winter Court if there was anywhere particularly lovely that she and Lucien might go. It had taken Viviane all of two seconds of peering at Elain silently for the other female to figure out exactly what Elain had been asking. Viviane’s pretty face had split into a wide smile, and she had nodded thoughtfully for a few moments. 

Elain had been told that a sleigh would be prepared to take Lucien and herself somewhere special. They would be provided with everything they would need to spend the night in this place, and that all they would need to bring would be themselves. Viviane would tell Elain nothing aside from the fact that they would have a spectacular view and would be very comfortable. Elain had wished, at first, that she knew more, but when she had considered the fact that Lucien might somehow be able to glean some information from her down the bond, she got over that. The less she knew, the less likely it would be that he would find out. At least this way it would remain a surprise for him. 

Having collected her mate at the appropriate time, Elain had found the sleigh where Viviane had said it would be, and there had been a lesser faerie with curved horns protruding from his forehead, waiting to drive them to their destination. The snow, which had at first been coming down thick and fast, had begun to lighten after a while, and Elain was pleased by the somewhat clear skies she could see ahead. Whatever view Viviane had been promising them would surely be more spectacular if they could actually see it without thick snow blocking everything out. She didn’t know how long it would take to get there, but she was happy enough to sit in the back of the sleigh with Lucien, blankets over the two of them to ensure they were warm and comfortable. 

Within the hour, the sleigh began to slow and Elain sat a little higher, trying to look around them. The trees were the same, and snow covered, and the land was a little more flat. The snow had indeed lightened until it was barely a light flurry, and Elain was ready to get out of the sleigh well before it had come to a stop. Lucien took the blanket from over her lap and began folding it while she jumped down into the thick snow, her eyes on a small domed building in front of her. 

“Oh…” Lucien jumped down into the snow beside her, one of his arms going around her shoulders. “I’ve heard of these.”

“Have you?” Elain glanced around as the sleigh began to move again, before it took off into the trees. She supposed that she and Lucien really were staying the night, then. 

“Yes… with the view one gets of the sky from inside, the night is apparently especially beautiful.”

Elain started toward the door of the little building. The structure looked mostly wooden, with some stone in the base, but the domed roof appeared to be entirely made of glass. “This is very cute.” She said, finding the door unlocked. Pushing it open, Elain went inside, with Lucien hot on her heels. 

“It is.”

Inside the house was what appeared to be a single room, with a small bathroom on the other side. It wasn’t big, but had a couple of benches around the edge and a small kitchenette area, but most of the space was taken up by a gigantic bed draped in blankets and furs. Elain couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. “This is perfect.”

“Oh, Petal, I do agree.” Lucien moved for the bed, and Elain watched him turn and flop back onto it, falling deep into the pile of fur. “What excellent privacy we shall have.”

“I am assuming that sleigh won’t return until tomorrow morning.”

“Divine.” Lucien murmured, “Nobody to get in our way…”

Elain walked around the little room, taking everything in. This was exactly the kind of thing she had wanted when she had asked Viviane for ideas. She would have to remember to thank the Lady of the Winter Court tomorrow. As she turned toward the bed, Elain allowed herself to look her mate over. He looked wonderfully appealing sprawled across the bed in the manner that he was, his vibrant red hair in stark contrast to the pale ivory and greys of the blankets and furs. “You look comfortable.” She said, and his eyes flicked directly to her. 

“Come lay here with me, my love.” He said, “Have a look at what we can see…”

Elain sank down onto the bed, settling her head against Lucien’s shoulder. From this position, she could see straight out of the glass roof, and she smiled at the wonderful colours of the coming sunset. Purples and pinks and oranges. “The snow was stopping…” she murmured, and Lucien made a pleased sound. 

“Yes.” He agreed, “We will have a most spectacular view of the clear sky tonight…”

Elain smiled, not feeling like moving in the slightest. She knew that Viviane had ensured that dinner would be provided for them and, judging by the delicious scent in the air, she knew that their food had been kept in the kitchenette. A shower, she supposed, would probably also not go astray. Neither of these things seemed to matter however, with Lucien laying beside her, his heartbeat loud in her mind, and happiness washing over her down the bond from him. 

“Do you like it?” she asked, and he gave a low laugh in response. “It is perfect, Petal.”

“Good. That makes me happy.” She turned her head just enough to press a gentle kiss to Lucien’s jaw, and she gave a soft groan of appreciation when he turned his own head to bend and press his lips to hers. “Very happy…”


	230. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty

**Chapter 230**

The golden liquid filled the mug as Elain tipped the bottle, and she smiled. The delicious scent that she remembered from the marketplace swirled around her, and she breathed deeply. Cinnamon, cloves, cardamom, and citrus. 

“Is that Gluhwein?” Lucien asked from where he lay among the blankets and furs on the bed.

“It appears so.” Elain turned her smile on her mate, then looked back down at what she was doing. As the world had grown darker outside of their little glass igloo, she had showered and set about making their home for the night comfortable. Lucien had followed her into he shower, and then taken a peek at what had been left for them for dinner, before he had returned to flop onto the bed with only his towel around his hips. Elain tried not to watch him as she put two mugs on a small tray and set two plates on the bench. 

Lucien, it appeared, knew that she was trying not to watch him and began to adjust himself into various poses in what was evidently an attempt to draw her eyes back to him. “Are you hungry, Petal?” he asked, his voice a mere purr as he shifted onto his side, resting his elbow against the mattress and his head in his hand. His eyes were on her when Elain glanced up and over his way again and, the instant she met his gaze, his smile turned vulpine. 

“That would be why I’m dishing out dinner for us.” She replied, raising an eyebrow at him, even as heat flooded her body. 

“What made you think I was referring to the food…?” he asked, his smile widening, and Elain made a show of rolling her eyes. 

“Maybe it was the fact that I’m holding food?” she lifted one of the little containers that had been left for them. 

“I was, in fact, referring to something else…” 

As Elain watched him, Lucien took hold of the edge of the towel he had wrapped around his hips and ripped it away from his body. Unable to help herself, Elain cracked up laughing. The look on Lucien’s face told her that this reaction had not been what he had been hoping for. “Oh… I am sorry, love.” She grinned, “You are very dramatic…”

“Dramatically unimpressive, it seems…” He gave her a pout and pulled one of the furry blankets over himself. Elain just smiled and shook her head. 

“Not at all, my very impressive mate.” She replied, dishing some of the roast potatoes from the container onto the plates she had laid out. “I am supremely impressed.” She set the dish aside and picked up the next. “Ah, yes.” She smiled again as she found the familiar delicious stew inside. “I hoped there would be some of this…”

Lucien sat up on the bed, the blanket over his lap as he looked at what she was doing. “Ah, yes. That’s what we could smell.” Elain nodded her agreement, trying not to spill any of the stew. 

When she had finished filling the plates with enough food, she set them on the tray she had lay out with the mugs of gluhwein. “Are you ready?” She asked, placing cutlery on the tray and then lifting it carefully. 

“You know I am, my love.”

“Get comfortable then.” Elain carried the tray from the little kitchenette area to the bed where she set it carefully on the mattress and, as gently as she could, she sat down beside Lucien and crossed her legs. 

“Thank you,” Lucien said, and Elain felt his hand ghost across her back as she leaned for the tray and picked up a plate and mug. She passed them to him, giving him cutlery next, before she picked up her own plate and a fork. 

“Not a problem.” She replied, flashing him a smile and then popping a piece of roasted potato into her mouth. She smiled again when he leaned into her, pressing his lips to her cheek, and she watched him, warmth moving through her again, as he sat straight once more and turned his attention to his plate. 

They ate in companionable silence for a while, and Elain’s eyes were drawn to the swiftly changing sky outside. The sunset had come and gone, and now the sky beyond the glad was turning dark and inky. “It is lucky that the snow has stopped…” Lucien put in, and Elain nodded her agreement. 

“Yes… We will have an unobstructed view.” She replied.

“Let us hope the Aurora will put on a show…”

“I have been hoping just that since I saw the roof.” She told him, setting her now empty plate back onto the tray and cradling her mug in her hands. Lucien set his empty plate atop hers and then picked up the tray and put it down on the floor beside the bed. He then shifted himself closer to her, allowing her to lean into him as he held his own mug in one hand while his other settled around her waist. 

Elain leaned into Lucien, settling her back against him and enjoying his steady warmth. She allowed that warmth to seep into her as she listened to his heart beating in her head while she was able to feel it at her back. Lifting her mug to her lips, she took a slow drink, allowing the delicious flavours to slide easily over her tongue. When she swallowed, Elain tilted her head back to rest against Lucien’s shoulder, and she smiled at how comfortable and content she felt. “I love you.” She murmured, and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. 

“And I love you, Petal.”

“I’m so happy that I got a handsome fae lord for a mate…”

Lucien gave a low chuckle at that, squeezing her to himself just a little. “And I am so happy that my mate is the most stunning creature I have ever beheld…” his voice was a purr again, and Elain smiled happily. “… and I have beheld some beautiful creatures.” He added, and her smile disappeared as she looked up at him. 

“Who?” she asked, and he winked at her. 

“You’ve seen some of the fae females in all of the courts now…” he told her, “Each more stunning than the last…”

Elain knew that he was teasing her, but jealousy flared deep within her all the same, and she set her empty mug aside as she turned more to look at him better. “Who?” she repeated, hurt spearing through her before she could control it. 

“No…” Lucien’s expression changed as he looked at her, and one of his hands came up to her cheek, his thumb caressing her cheekbone gently. “No, my love…” he murmured, and she felt him reaching for her down the bond. “Nobody that compares to you… Not ever…”

Elain allowed him to soothe her, leaning into his touch, her eyes closing as he continued to caress her cheek, and she allowed him to wrap himself around her through the bond. She could feel the honesty of his words, could feel that he had only been teasing her, and she let it calm the irrational jealousy that had moved through her. “This handsome fae lord…” he breathed, “has never met anyone who could even compare to his beautiful mate.”


	231. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-One

**Chapter 231**

Lucien’s arms were around Elain, and he was holding her firmly to himself. She could hear his heartbeat thundering in her head, and she could feel his worry that he had hurt her. “I love you, Petal…” he breathed, and she could feel that breath against her hair, “I love you more than I have ever loved anything in this world…” Elain nodded, leaning back against his chest, and she settled her own hands over his, still at her waist. Slowly, she began tracing the backs of his hands with her fingers, and she listened to the way that his heartbeat reacted to her touch. She smiled when that steady thump quickened, and an instant later she felt him press a kiss to the top of her head. The jealousy that she had been feeling vanished as quickly as it had appeared, and she linked the fingers of one of her hands with his. “You know,” he whispered, having bent his head to bring his lips to her ear, “that what I said was true?” Elain leaned further into him, her eyes on the sky through their glass ceiling, “I have never in my life seen anything or anyone as mesmerising as you.”

“I do know that.” She replied softly, her eyes following the faint green glow that moved across the sky. “I can feel the truth of it through the bond.” Lucien squeezed her hand gently, his lips brushing her cheek. She lay her head back against his shoulder, her eyes still on the sky. “I know how you feel every time you look at me.”

“Then you know there is no cause for you to ever feel jealous.”

“I know that.” She said, “But it’s not that easy to control.”

“Mmm.” He kissed her cheek again, and then dipped his head further to her shoulder, “I know. I know how that feels…”

“Look at the sky.” She told him, smiling as the aurora burst into full life above them. The entire room filled with the ethereal green light, and Elain decided that whoever had come up with the idea for glass roof igloos was a genius.

“It’s stunning…” Lucien said, his voice gentle and appreciative. Elain nodded her head, not taking her eyes off of the colour-play above them. Green and blue danced across the sky, and Elain was fascinated by the tinges of red here and there. 

“Wow…”

“Beautiful.” Lucien murmured, then tightened his arms around her once more, “But, still not as beautiful as you.” 

Turning her head, Elain raised an eyebrow at him and he smiled at her in return. “Flattery,” she said, “will get you everywhere.” 

“Everywhere?” he asked, amusement clear in his tone and Elain shuddered as Lucien’s fingers stroked her hips slowly. 

“Mmm…” She bent her knees, bringing her legs up a little and, with her free hand, she drew the skirts of her dress up to her thighs, freeing her legs. “Why don’t we see…?” Her eyes closed for a moment when Lucien’s warm lips returned to her throat, and she tilted her head slightly to make it easier for him. 

“Why don’t we see…” he repeated her words back to her a moment before she felt one of his strong hands sliding from her bent knee, up her thigh and beneath her dress. 

“Yes,” Elain barely managed to get the word out, and it was followed by a shuddery sigh a moment later. She opened her legs a little more, opening her eyes again to watch the aurora swirling across the sky. Lucien’s hand slid up the inside of her thigh, and she gasped a little when his fingers went carefully between her legs. The soft laugh he gave at her reaction pleased her, and she settled back against him, cradled against his chest as that hand worked steadily to draw more gasps and pleasured sounds from her. 

“Do you like that, Petal?” Lucien’s voice was a growl in her ear, and Elain nodded, one of her hands gripping his knee tightly as his fingers continued to stroke her in exactly the right way. When she began to shudder, Lucien brought his other hand around to hold her left thigh wide, keeping her open and accessible to him. Elain whimpered, pushing herself harder back against him, her feet pointed as she strained to move. She gasped again and again, her hands on Lucien tightening as her hips lifted, wanting more of him. He didn’t break his rhythm or change what he was doing in the slightest however, and Elain let out a shriek, trying her best to keep still but unable to do so. Lucien laughed, low and hot in her ear, holding her exactly where he needed her to continue what he had been doing, and then her back arched and she shrieked again, her eyes falling closed as her heart raced and she lost track of everything that was going on. 

The green and blue were still dancing across the sky when Elain opened her eyes again, and their ethereal light was still playing around the room. Her heart continued to race, but slightly less than it had been before, and she could hear Lucien’s sure and steady in her mind. Drawing and releasing a deep breath, Elain turned her head to find herself still sitting with her back to her mate’s chest. He had pulled her dress back down over her thighs, covering her, and his hands were now gently caressing her legs and hips as he pressed a soft kiss to her hair. “How do you feel, Petal?” he asked, voice low and sensual enough that Elain’s blood quickened at the sound. 

“I feel good.” She breathed, sitting up a little so that she could turn to look him in the eyes. “How about you?”

He gave her a twisted smirk then, his golden eye clicking and whirring as he met her gaze, and she smiled back at him when one of his hands moved up her back. “Are you sure you aren’t tired?” he asked, hand caressing her carefully, and Elain widened her smile, holding his eyes. 

“Not at all… are you?” she asked, “Are you worn out already?”

“I think you know better than that, my love.”

“Do I?”

Lucien’s eyes narrowed and his smile grew even more twisted as he looked at her. “Do you need me to prove it yet again?”

“You don’t have to prove anything.” She replied, her heart really beginning to race again now, “I was only asking…”

Lucien’s heart was quickening to catch hers, and she couldn’t help but lift one of her hands, sliding it up his chest to his shoulder. “I could never be too tired to touch my mate… Even more stunning than the aurora… my mate who should know how I feel because she can feel it herself whenever I look at her…”

“And whenever you touch her…” Elain added, reading for the bond, wanting to feel how much he wanted her as his hand continued to move up and down her back, petting and stroking her. She held his gaze again as she slid her hand from his shoulder, back down over his stomach to the blanket he had draped over his lower half. 

“Oh…” he grinned, lifting his chin just a little as her hand slipped beneath the blanket. Elain held her breath, feeling him shudder beneath her touch when she took hold of him. An instant later she realised that his hand on her back had begun loosening her dress and she reluctantly let go of him to help him rid her of the dress. He was already naked, and she saw no reason not to join him immediately.


	232. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Two

**Chapter 232**

Elain’s back hit the fur and she stretched out luxuriously, enjoying the feel of it against her skin.

“Nice, isn’t it?” Lucien breathed, leaning over her before pressing a soft kiss to her lips. Elain nodded her head, lifting a hand to his cheek as she returned his kiss. She groaned a little into that kiss when her mate’s hand slid over her skin, up to stomach to clutch at one of her breasts. Lucien’s smile was evident even though Elain couldn’t see it, and then she felt him seeking to deepen the kiss. Parting her lips for him, Elain allowed him to press closer, enjoying the weight of him as he moved to settle over her, one of his knees pushing between her legs. 

“Mmm, nice…” she managed to murmur the words when Lucien lifted his head to watch her for a moment. She gave him a suggestive smile when his hand rubbed at her breast again and he hooked one of his feet around her calf, pulling that leg wide. She loved when he was like this, firm in what he wanted, and so attentive to her, watching carefully for her reactions and clearly enjoying those reactions. 

Lucien slid the hand that wasn’t currently at Elain’s breast down her body, tracing over her hip and to her thigh. She shuddered as his fingertips ghosted over her skin, stroking softly, and then she gasped when it went between her legs. “Is that nice?” his breath was hot, panted against her ear, and Elain gave a whimper as she nodded, gasping again when he pushed a finger inside of her. 

“Lucien…”

“More?” he asked, and she nodded again, her hands clutching at his shoulders when a second finger joined the first. 

“Mmmm…” Elain held on to him, her eyes closed and her lower lip caught between her teeth as Lucien thrust his fingers into her over and over, “Uhh…ah...” Green and blue light danced across her vision despite her eyes still being tightly closed, and she bit back a whimper, trying to pull him closer. “Luicen…” she groaned, “I… I want you…”

His hot mouth closed over a sensitive spot on Elain’s throat and her eyes flew open an instant before he pulled his fingers from her, and she met those eyes in the ethereal shifting green light when he raised his head enough to look at her. Elain held his gaze, her eyes locked onto his as she felt him adjust himself over her and position himself correctly. She tilted her hips just a little, anticipation almost painful as she held her breath, waiting for him, and then the tiniest sound escaped her when Lucien slowly and carefully pushed himself inside of her. His soft groan set her blood alight, and Elain immediately hooked one of her feet around behind his knee, both of her hands gripping him tightly, one at his shoulder, and the other at his lower back.

“This what you wanted, Petal?”

“Y-yes…” Elain’s voice was breathy, and she had to fight to keep her eyes open, wanting to watch her mate, take in his gorgeous face in the pretty green light, “Ahh…”

“Yeah?” His hand slid down Elain’s thigh, catching behind one of her knees as he slowly withdrew and then thrust into her again. 

“Mhmm…” Elain let another gasp out, her eyes still locked onto Lucien’s face. She watched him hovering above her, holding himself still again, and she realised that he was holding his breath. “What are you doing?” she asked, tracing her fingernails lightly up and down his back. Lucien’s smile turned vulpine. 

“I want to watch you…” He’d barely gotten the words out when he’d thrust again and Elain clutched at him, a loud moan escaping her. Lucien gave a small chuckle, going still again and Elain slid one hand up to his face, her fingers tracing his jaw. 

“Are you trying to torture me?”

“No, Petal…” he laughed again, pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose, and then again between her eyes. “I just want to see you feel every moment of it…”

“Ah…”

“I want you to feel me…” he thrust again, slow and deep, and Elain pushed her hand up into his hair, gripping a handful of it tightly, her back arching a little beneath him. 

“Ohh…”

“Like that, then?” he sounded amused and Elain looked at him, not surprised to see his grin as he repeated the action once more, and she bit back any further sounds. “Oh, you’re going to be like that?”

“Maybe…” Elain knew that he liked to hear her, and she decided that if he was going to tease her, he was going to have to work harder to earn those sounds he was after. 

“Alright…” both of his hands went to her hips then, as he thrust into her more quickly, and Elain was barely able to hold in a gasp. Lucien gave a laugh, obviously aware that he’d nearly had her, and he only quickened his pace in response. Her own grip on his hair tightened, and she brought her other hand up to his shoulder, her fingers digging into his skin as she clutched at him. She’d been momentarily worried that she might cut him with her fingernails, but her tightened grip on him only seemed to encourage Lucien and he lifted her hips a little to himself, dragging her down and into a better position, allowing himself a new angle as he settled into a steady rhythm, thrusting deep into her body over and over again. 

Elain’s breathing quickly became only a series of soft gasps, and she found herself unable to catch her breath. Each gasp aligned itself to one of Lucien’s thrusts, and she forgot all about her efforts in keeping in her sounds. “Ah… ah…”

“You like… uh… that, Petal?” he grunted, and she could hear in his own breathing that his efforts were really taking it out of him, she nodded, her eyes on her mate, half mesmerised by the way the lights of the aurora reflected off of his skin and his vibrant red hair. “Hn….”

“Yes…” Elain released his hair, both of her hands then sliding down his chest as he sat a little higher, shifting his angle yet again. Her back arching, Elain gave a small cry, “Ah!” her hands finding Lucien’s forearms and gripping them tightly, “Ah…” her hips were moving to meet his thrusting, and she could hear almost nothing over the loud beating of her mate’s heart in her head. She knew that he was panting, because could see him, his face, and the way his chest moved as he breathed, but that heartbeat was so very loud. 

He moved over her again, lowering her hips, and pressing himself down on her. Elain wrapped her legs around him, trying to pull him deeper, parting her lips for him when he kissed her again, wanting more of him. She wound one of her arms around the back of his neck, whimpering into the kiss as her heartbeat raced to match his and she felt herself approaching her edge.

Feeling Lucien brush against her down the bond, she knew that he was keenly aware of how close she was. She felt him smile into the kiss as he maintained his steady rhythm as the gorgeous greens and blue lights flickered around them. Closing her eyes as her back arched again, Elain couldn’t help her hips lifting to meet Lucien, “ah…” she gasped into the kiss, unable to help herself, “ah…”

When Lucien brought his lips back to Elain’s ear, murmuring soft encouragement to her, she lost all sense of herself, clutching at him as she shrieked, her vision dissolving around her. She heard her mate’s cry as if from far away, and then she was enveloped in warmth as his arms moved around her and he cradled her to himself, pulling the softest fur over them both.


	233. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Three

**Chapter 233**

Elain found Viviane in the Eisblume garden the next morning after she and Lucien had returned to the palace. The Lady of the Winter Court smiled brightly at her as she approached and Elain returned the smile easily. She pulled her cloak a little tighter around her shoulders, adjusting it so that her hands were tucked warmly inside as she came to stand beside the blonde female. 

“Did you enjoy your evening?” Viviane asked, her voice warm and pleasant in the chill air. 

“We did, thank you.” Elain looked at the gorgeous Eisblume flowers, before turning to look at Viviane again, “That place was perfect.”

“Yes…” Viviane smiled, “I thought that was something like what you were after…”

“That was exactly what I was after.” She felt herself blush, knowing that her friend had been all too aware of what she and Lucien had wanted to do. There was no doubt about that considering the kind of place that glass igloo had been. Isolated, private… little more than a bed. Viviane smiled again. 

“Kal and I sometimes sneak away for a night in one of those igloos.” She said, “When we can spare the time or need a break from everything.”

“I hope that isn’t too rare.” Elain replied, and her friend gave a small shrug.

“We make do.”

They stood in silence for a few minutes until Nesta came wandering toward them through the garden. Elain held a hand out to her sister who took it in one of her own. “These flowers are stunning.” Nesta said, her eyes on Viviane. “I have never seen their like.”

“Nor would you, I expect.” The Lady of the Winter Court said, her voice tinged with pride. “They are truly unique.”

“Yes…” Nesta’s eyes shifted to Elain, “I do understand why you wanted to see all of the Courts and collect flowers for your book.”

“You’ve seen a few Courts now.” Elain replied, “You should go to the one ones you haven’t been to.”

“I think I will do just that.” Nesta said, her tone thoughtful. “… are you ready to leave?”

“Yes.” Elain smiled at her and then Viviane, “Lucien was bringing our bags down after he was done speaking with Kallias.”

“I got the sleigh ready.” Viviane told them gently, “To take you to where you can Winnow from.”

“Thank you.” Elain took one of Viviane’s hands, “It has been lovely to see you again, and please come and visit when you have the chance.”

“Of course.” Viviane patted Elain’s hand, “It will not be long before we see one another again, I believe.” Elain nodded, hoping that were true. She very much liked the Lady of the Winter Court, and she was glad that Viviane had become one of the first actual friends she had made in her new life.

“I do hope so.”

*

Lucien walked carefully down the stairs of Kallias’ palace, his own pack and Elain’s over his shoulders. He had finished speaking with the High Lord not long ago, and so was not expecting to see the blonde waiting for him halfway down the staircase into the main entrance. Kallias stood with his back to the wall, one knee bent over the other almost nonchalantly. Upon noticing Lucien heading his way, Kallias stood straight and smiled, uncrossing his arms. 

“You’re all packed?”

“We did it earlier this morning, I only needed to go and collect our things.” He watched as Kallias nodded and bit his lower lip, evidently wanting to say something. Lucien had no idea what it could be, so he remained silent, taking one slow step down the stairs after the other. After several moments, the High Lord cleared his throat as if about to speak and Lucien just waited. 

“Ah… so, you are Helion’s heir.”

“Yes…” Lucien resisted raising an eyebrow. Kallias had been there when he’d been publicly claimed. This should not be new or exciting news for him. 

“I… I suppose I just wanted to say that I know that will be hard.” Kallias ran a hand through his white blonde hair, and down the back of his neck. “Probably more so because it is likely something you never even considered having to do.”

“As Beron’s seventh son?” Lucien asked mildly, “I never thought for a moment.”

“Yes…” Kallias glanced at him, and Lucien gave him a smile. “I just wanted to make the offer that if you ever need to vent…”

Actually taken aback by that, Lucien smiled more widely. “I thank you. Really.” He said, and meant it. He doubted he would have ever asked Rhys to talk in that way, and probably not Eris. It would entirely depend on Tamlin’s mood and where their friendship stood if he would have gone to the Spring Court for help, and so this offer from the High Lord of the Winter Court did actually mean something. 

“You’re welcome.” Kallias stepped with Lucien outside and they found their mates along with Nesta waiting for them in the midday snow. “If you leave now you should be able to reach the Night Court by lunch…”

“True…” Lucien set about putting his and Elain’s packs in the waiting sleigh while his mate said her goodbye’s to the High Lord. He then turned to Viviane who stepped closer and wrapped her arms around him. 

“You are welcome at any time, friend.” She said, and Lucien thought his heart might burst. He had known that these faeries were his friends from long ago, but he hadn’t realised how much. Perhaps during the time with Amarantha they had been so caught up in what was happening to their Court and what that evil bitch had been doing that they hadn’t had much space for anything else. Now, they were free to put time and energy into other things like friendships, and it truly touched him. 

“Thank you. The same holds true for you in the Day Court.”

When Viviane released him, he stepped up into the carriage and offered his hand to Elain to assist her up beside him. He then did the same for Nesta and was a little surprised when she accepted his help. Before very long, they were gliding once more through the snow to the border where it would be easier for him to Winnow them toward the Night Court.


	234. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Four

**Chapter 234**

Taking a deep breath to steady himself, Lucien followed Elain and Nesta up the little path towards Rhysand’s town house. He hadn’t expected to feel this way again when they returned to the Night Court, but that old anxiety was back. He had never belonged here, he’d always felt like an outsider every time he had walked through these doors, and he felt that way again now. Elain didn’t, he realised, watching the way that his mate smiled happily when Nesta opened the door and the two of them went inside. He could feel her excitement and her pleasure. She was keen to be here. This was her family. It wasn’t his. He felt a momentary pang of hurt, knowing that they would never accept him the way they did her, and then Elain looked over her shoulder at him. 

“Love…” she said, reaching a hand out for him, and Lucien took it, allowing her to pull him through the door and into the entryway. Elain smiled at him, holding his hand firmly, and he felt himself relax just a little.

“Sounds like someone is in here…” Nesta murmured, heading toward a nearby door. Lucien and Elain followed her, and they did indeed find several members of the Court draped on couches and sitting around the room. 

“You win.” Mor said, looking at Rhys as the High Lord got to his feet in greeting. Rhys winked at Mor. 

“I do know how these things work.”

“You owe me a bottle of wine.” The blonde said, leaning back in her chair and raising her very nearly empty glass. 

“Ah.” Rhys made a vague gesture and a bottle appeared on the table in front of Mor. “I owe you a bottle of wine?” he asked, “Despite the fact that I won the bet?”

Mor just smiled at him, reaching forward and picking up the bottle before refilling her glass. 

“What was the bet?” Lucien asked, not entirely sure that he wanted to know the answer. 

“They were all placing bets on when you three would get here.” Feyre put in as she got to her own feet and moved toward her sisters. Lucien watched her wrap her arms around Elain, holding her close. 

“And I won.” Rhys put in, taking up his seat on the armrest of Feyre’s recently vacated seat. “By rather a lot, I might add.”

“It wasn’t by that much.” Azriel said, “Mine was dinner…”

“Hours away.” Rhys waved a hand, “But at least you got the day correct. Cassian said three days from now.”

“I stand by it.” Cassian said brightly, “I thought they would have loads of things to do in the Winter Court.”

“They’re efficient.” Nesta murmured, and Lucien slanted a glance at the eldest sister, feeling Elain’s embarrassment at that comment down the bond. He squeezed his mate’s hand, making sure that his courtly mask of indifference was firmly in place. He watched as Elain adopted a similar expression , tilting her head a little as her eyes scanned the room. He did the same thing, almost daring one of them to make a comment about why he and Elain had gone to the Winter Court. 

“Well, we could have stayed.” He eventually said into the silence, “But we knew that Nesta was keen to get back and see…” his eyes found Cassian and he just stared at the Illyrian for a moment, “… everyone.”

Nesta made a high pitched sound like a boiling kettle and the look on her face when she turned her cold eyes on Lucien nearly made him flee the room. She composed herself an instant later, however, folding her arms before moving to take a seat on a long couch by a bookshelf. The fact that she hadn’t openly attacked him made Lucien smile slightly and think about how much her attitude toward him had changed since he had first returned to see Elain. He hadn’t ever forgotten overhearing her telling his mate that she could do better than him, and now he wondered if Nesta didn’t almost consider him family. 

“What were the other bets?” Elain asked, moving to side by her sister, and Lucien followed her, sinking down next to her. 

“I said tomorrow.” Feyre replied, resting against Rhys who slid an arm around her shoulders, and Lucien looked at Amren then. 

“I said you would return by tomorrow. Maybe during the night.” Amren picked up Mor’s bottle of wine and ignored the indignant look from the blonde before filling her glass. “There might have been some dramatic event that would cause you to leave after dark…”

“You thought we’d have to flee the Winter Court in the middle of the night?” Lucien asked, raising an eyebrow. Amren gave him a disturbing grin. 

“Nothing so dramatic.” Elain interjected, “… did we miss lunch?”

“Not yet.” Rhys said, “It should be ready soon… if we want to move to the table?”

“That sounds good…” Elain moved to get up and Lucien followed her. “I didn’t have much at breakfast…”

“The food at the Winter Court is good, isn’t it?” Mor asked, “I used to love visiting Viviane. They have this stew that is so satisfying…” The blonde sat herself on the other side of Elain, and the two of them began discussing the tastier aspects of the Winter Court while several platters of sandwiches and cold meats were placed up and down the table before them.

Lucien spent most of lunch just listening to conversations around him. It was much the same as the last time he had been here with Elain. She fit in with them all so easily, and they were easy with her. He watched how happy she was speaking with her sisters, as well as the Illyrians, Mor, and Amren. She could have lived here happily, he knew. He was taking her away from this, he realised. If he hadn’t come back then she would be living here with her family, happily tending her garden. 

As if sensing his thoughts, Elain turned toward him then and he smiled gently at her when he felt her hand slide into his lap. She rubbed at his leg for a moment, her eyes on his. “Love you.” She murmured, and he wrapped an arm around her waist. 

“Love you, too.” He replied.


	235. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Five

**Chapter 235**

Sitting in front of the mirror in her old room, Elain pulled a brush through her hair. She had gotten changed after lunch into something more appropriate for the garden, and she had been intending to head out into the garden for the afternoon. Her hair, she had decided, needed to be braided up and out of her way. Before she had had the chance to begin, however, there was a knock at her door and then Feyre bounded into the room. 

“You’ve learned to knock.” Elain said, setting her brush aside, “Although, it is customary to wait until the person inside can respond.”

“Still my house.” Feyre said, “I am the High Lady, you know?”

“I know.” Elain smiled at her sister in the mirror.

“What did you intend to do?” Feyre’s blue-grey eyes moved over Elain in the mirror as she approached from behind. “You’ve changed your dress…”

“I wanted to get out into the garden.” Elain told her, “It’s been a while since I saw it.”

“Oh, of course.”

“Do you think you could braid my hair up for me?” Smiling widely, Elain picked up her brush once more and passed it to her sister who nodded and set about brushing her hair gently. She watched her sister begin to section her hair out and then carefully and neatly braid it. There had been a time where they would all do this for one another. It had been Feyre’s hair on which Nesta had taught Elain to braid as a child. 

“Do you miss this?” Feyre asked, seemingly having read her. 

“I do.” Elain replied, “Sometimes…”

“We shall have to make sure it is something we do more often…” Feyre’s quick fingers worked quickly, cleverly, to pull Elain’s honey hair up into a pretty braid around the crown of her head. Elain smiled in agreement, thinking about it. At least the Day Court shared a border with the Night Court. They really wouldn’t be too far away, especially when Lucien could winnow her whenever she wanted to visit. “If we set a standing time where we have a dinner or something of that sort, then we will have something to look forward to and you might feel less … alone… when you’re away from us.”

“I won’t feel alone.” Elain said, her eyes on Feyre’s face in the mirror, “I’ll have Lucien.”

“Yes…” Feyre’s voice was gentle, “Being your mate, I’m sure he will provide a sense of home.”

“He does.”

“Good.” Feyre secured the braid and then moved to sit on the bed, and Elain spun around in her chair to properly look at her sister. “How are you feeling about Lucien being declared Helion’s Heir and one day being High Lord of the Day Court?”

“Well, it’s good.” Elain said, “He wanted a family, and now he has that. He has a place he belongs… and with Ashk there too…” She couldn’t help a bright smile. “He deserves it.”

“Is it what you want?”

“I want him to be happy… and I … I do like it there.”

“I am glad.”

Elain got to her feet and walked across the room to sit on the bed beside her sister. “How long did it take for you to feel at home here?”

“OH…” Feyre appeared to think for a moment, “A while… I… my situation was different, though. I didn’t show up here happily mated…”

“True…” Elain thought about the Day Court and how amazed she had been when she and Lucien had first arrived. Helion had done a lot to make them feel welcome, giving them free reign of the Court and encouraging her to look through the libraries. The Court had been mostly welcoming too, apart from Sorcha. They appeared to have accepted Lucien, and he fit in well there. She knew, when the time came, that her mate would make a wonderful High Lord. 

If she were being honest with herself, Elain liked that she accepted the mating bond there. It was an important part of her life with Lucien, and she liked that she had done it in the Court that he would one day rule. Memories could help build a home, and their bond and frenzy was already working well to be wonderful memories in that place.

“Are you still going out to the garden?” Feyre asked, getting to her feet. 

“Absolutely.” Smoothing her top down, Elain followed her sister to the door and out into the hallway. Feyre gave her a smile before heading off to her own room and Elain headed for the stairs and down. 

Outside, she drew a slow breath, savouring the familiar light floral scent that hit her as soon as she had stepped out into the garden. She could tell instantly that while the garden had been tended, nobody had spent the amount of time she spent out here. Within a few moments, she had made a mental list of what needed to be done in order to get things back to the way she had had them before she and Lucien had taken off across Prythian. 

Rolling her sleeves up, Elain headed for the first flowerbed, ready to get to work. She settled into her rhythm as she had used to do, listening to the sweet birdsong, and enjoying the shadows that danced overhead as the large tree above her moved in the evening breeze. She had missed this garden, as she had grown quite fond of it over the months she had spent working on it and getting it the way she had wanted. It would be a shame to give it up, knowing that it wouldn’t be hers any longer and that someone else would predominantly working on it. 

As she knelt on the grass, weeding the flowerbed, Elain wondered what everyone else was doing. They had spoken about dinner at the House of Wind, but Rhys, Azriel and Cassian had all disappeared after Lunch, and had not yet returned. She had time, she knew, before she would need to go and bathe to get ready for dinner. She figured that she could get through at least three garden beds before she had to give up for the night. Elain was so caught up in her work and her thoughts that she didn’t so much as notice the door to the house opening, or Lucien coming outside and walking toward her.


	236. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Six

**Chapter 236**

Pulling weeds from the soft earth, Elain was tossing them aside, intent upon her work. She didn’t notice anything going on around her until something touched her shoulder and she looked up in shock to see her mate leaning over her. He smiled at her, evidently seeing her surprise, and Elain dropped the weed she had been holding.

“I didn’t hear you come out.” She said, and began brushing her dress off, noticing how much dirt she had managed to get on herself. 

“I can be sneaky.” He replied, reaching a hand down to help her up. Elain took his hand, letting him pull her to her feet and she went up on her toes to press a kiss to his lips when he slipped an arm around her waist, drawing her close. 

“I’m sure you can.” She brushed her dress off again, smoothing it down. “What have you been doing since lunch?”

“Not a lot.” He replied, “I spoke to Rhys about the trade routes, and the progress some of the other High Lords have made on their parts.”

“Ahh… taking your role as the heir to the Day Court seriously…”

“Of course.” He winked at her. 

Elain moved out of the afternoon sun to stand in the shade of the pink blossom tree, and Lucien followed her, his hands coming to rest on her waist and stomach as he pressed himself up behind her. “Ah…” leaning back into him, Elain rested her head against his chest and shoulder, placing her hands over his and enjoying his gentle warmth. Slowly, Lucien began to rock side to side, holding Elain to himself as he pressed a kiss to her hair.

“It looks like this place has missed you.” He said, and Elain let her eyes run over the garden once more. 

“It’s still beautiful.” She replied, looking at the riot of colours in the garden beds, highlighted by the perfect evening light. The soft peaches and golds in the sky cast a lovely warm glow over everything, and Elain smiled. “Look at the colours…”

“I hardly noticed them.” He kissed the top of her head, “But you are right, my love.” Not releasing his hold on her, Lucien walked Elain toward the tree under which they used to sit, and then he turned her. She looked up at him as he backed her into the trunk of the tree, his hands still firmly upon her. “Still, they do not compare to you.”

“Are you being flattering again?” she asked, “Using your courtly powers for personal gain…?”

“You did say that flattery will get me everywhere…”

Pink flower blossoms floated down around them, and Elain brought one of her hands up to brush a few from Lucien’s red hair. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked at her and she tilted her face up to him, the back of her head against the bark of the tree. “Remember when you first came back?” she asked, “And you would bring me tea and cake…?”

“I will remember those days,” Lucien began, his voice gentle, “until the day that I die.” Elain wrapped her arms around his neck, drawing him in closer and down to her. 

“I miss them.” She told him, “The freedom we had to just sit out here and do whatever we liked for as long as we liked. There were no responsibilities, and nobody wanting our attention and time…”

“I agree.” He murmured, pressing his lips to the tip of her nose. Elain giggled, and he did it again. “We should be sure to spend some more time out here while in the Night Court…”

“But we should now get ready to go to the House of Wind for dinner…” Elain resisted a sigh. She would have preferred to spend her evening out here with Lucien while everyone else was gone. She told him this and he made an interesting face. 

“You will enjoy your dinner with your sisters.” He said, voice confident, and Elain knew that what he said was true. “Especially watching the way they are with the others…” She knew that he meant Nesta and Cassian, and she knew that it would be hilarious. 

“Yes…” she smiled and let Lucien go. He looked as if he were about to step away from her, but then he’d moved closer again, kissing her. Elain wrapped her arms around him again, returning his kiss with enthusiasm and she promised herself that they would continue this when they had the time.

Not ten minutes later, they had gone upstairs, and Elain bit her lip as she thought about the clothing she had brought with her and what to wear.

“Coming, Petal?” Lucien asked when she hesitated by Nesta’s door.

“I just have to ask Nes what she’s going to wear…” she grabbed her sister’s door handle, and then pushed the door open. Her sister hadn’t come down since lunch and she knew that she would be in her room. What she hadn’t expected was to find her sister atop Cassian, not wearing a thing at all. Before Elain could so much as gasp, Lucien’s hand closed over her mouth and he pulled her backwards and out the door into the hallway, closing the door silently as he did so. 

Elain didn’t make a sound until they were both safely in her room, and then she couldn’t help a high-pitched squeal of a sound, flailing her hands as she did so. Lucien just nodded in apparent agreement, not needing words to understand her sentiments.


	237. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Seven

**Chapter 237**

Lucien watched Elain move around her room, wringing her hands and muttering to herself. He understood her inability to keep still after what they had just walked in on. He couldn’t wipe the image from his own mind; Cassian laying upon the bed, wings spread out beneath him with Nesta atop him, arse in the air. Lucien ran his hands over his face and turned toward the wall. It had been graphic, to say the least.

Elain made a noise of distress and he turned toward her to see her dragging her fingers through her hair, pulling her braids apart and he smiled. “Petal…” he said, taking several steps toward her. She looked around at him, eyebrows lifted questioningly. Lucien didn’t know what to say, there was nothing that would take that image of Nesta and Cassian from Elain’s mind, so he just held a hand out to her. She took it, moving closer until she could lean against him. 

“… did you see…” she breathed, and he nodded. 

“Uh-huh…” he stroked a hand down her newly freed hair, enjoying the feeling of the waves caused by being braided up. “I suppose she really was keen to see him again.”

“I’ll say.” Elain muttered, “She didn’t waste any time.”

“Nesta does seem like someone who knows what she wants.”

“She always has been.” Elain looked up at him, and Lucien met her eyes. He brought his fingers to her cheek, stroking her skin as he held her dark gaze. 

“I suppose we’ve been much the same.” He told her, and Elain blushed. Lucien smiled at her, following that blush with his fingertips. 

“I… I do keep reminding Feyre that she needs to knock…” Her voice was soft, and she smiled bashfully for a moment, “I guess I need to follow my own instructions.” Unable to help a soft laugh, Lucien held Elain closer to himself. 

“Yes, Petal.” He agreed, “I think it’s best if you knock before walking into either of your sisters’ bedrooms from now on.”

“I’ll try to remember that.” She replied, “Though… I doubt Feyre and Rhys bother to keep their … activities… to the bedroom.”

“That, I believe, is probably accurate.” Lucien was pretty certain that the High Lord and Lady of the Night Court had fucked one another is probably every room in this house. Glancing around this room, he tried not to picture where they could have done it, and instead eyed the bed, remembering the first night he had come to Elain and what he had done to her there. When she laughed he knew that he must have sent something of his thoughts down the bond to her and he glanced down at her to see her gazing up at him. 

“You came to show me what you could do with your mouth…” she murmured, and he found his gaze trained on her pretty lips, “It was very memorable…”

“I am pleased to hear that, my love.” He slid a hand into her hair, gripping gently and pulling her head back a little, “Perhaps after dinner I’ll give you a repeat performance.” He felt her shiver of excitement down the bond, and he smiled more widely.

“I look forward to that…” she told him, her gentle hands moving down his back.

“Me too.” He said, already anticipating the moment he would have his mate back up in here alone after their dinner at the House of Wind. It had been entirely too long since he’d been able to use his tongue on her in that way, and the mere thought of it was heating his blood.

“I think we should get ready for dinner.” Elain told him, tilting her head to look up at him again. He could tell from the way her eyes moved over him that she was aware of his sudden piqued heat. “I’m dirty from the garden and I need to get dressed.”

*

Elain sank into her seat at the dinner table, smoothing her hair down from the wild ride up to the House of Wind. She watched as Nesta did the same, pressing her own hair back into a sleek bun at the nape of her neck. Considering how neat and put together Nesta appeared, Elain knew that nobody who was looking at her sister now would ever guess at what she had been doing not a half hour ago. Cassian, on the other hand, kept leaning casually back in his seat and running his hands though his already messy hair as he grinned at the rest of the table. 

“What is it, Elain?” Nesta’s tone was quiet, and Elain looked at her quickly. “You keep looking at me…”

“N-nothing.” Elain replied, shaking her head. “You… just look nice.”

Nesta gave her a small smile, and Elain tried not to stare at her. Her sister looked relaxed and comfortable, and Elain didn’t know how long it had been since she had seen Nesta look that way. She couldn’t help flicking a glance at Cassian who was also looking at Nesta. As if sensing her gaze, the Illyrian looked her way and he raised an eyebrow when she met his eyes. An instant later, Cassian gave her an arrogant smirk, and Elain knew that he’d cottoned on to what she had been thinking.

“Looks like we are all here.” Rhys said from the other end of the table, and all eyes turned his way. “To celebrate Elain and Lucien being back with us,” the High Lord went on, “I took the liberty of getting us all tickets to a rather well anticipated show in Velaris tonight. It’s after dinner… if you would all like to come.”

“What kind of show?” Azriel asked, interest in his voice.

“One of the city’s most popular vocalists.” Rhys said, “It’s a bit of an underground venue… very exclusive.” He winked at Feyre who smiled at her mate.

“Of course it is.” Mor put in. “I look forward to it…”

Elain turned to Lucien, raising an eyebrow in question at him. They had hoped to get back to their room after dinner for some time alone, and she wondered if he was interested in the show. “What do you think?” she asked, sliding her hand up his leg.

“I’m open to it if you are.” He replied, “I know you enjoy those types of shows….”

She nodded, thinking about how much she had liked the singer that Kallias had organised in the Winter Court for them. “I do…” she murmured, smiling at him when he slid one of his big hands into hers, “I think it sounds like fun.”

He leaned toward her then and Elain tilted her head, allowing him to bring his lips to her ear. “As you wish, Petal.” He said, kissing her cheek a moment later. “We will have plenty of time afterwards for our earlier plans…”


	238. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Eight

**Chapter 238**

Crossing the bridge over the Sidra, Elain wrapped her arms around herself, and shivered in the cool breeze. She smiled at Nesta who strode beside her, and then looked out across the river. The lights of Velaris reflected prettily in the black waters of the Sidra, rippling and changing with the swift current, and the sounds of the city bounced off the water and up to meet them on the bridge. Cassian and Azriel walked ahead of them with Rhys, and Elain tried for a moment to listen to see what the three of them were talking about when Cassian kept glancing back over his shoulder at them. 

“What, do you think, is he looking at?” Feyre asked, her voice teasing, as their youngest sister walked along beside them on the other side of Nesta. 

“Nothing.” Nesta said simply, her tone suggesting she was unwilling to discuss it further. Feyre just laughed and leaned around Nesta to smile at Elain. Returning the smile for a moment, Elain allowed herself to enjoy the teasing, especially considering the fact that she would soon be missing moments like these when she went back to the Day Court.

As they came off the bridge, Elain turned her attention to the uneven stone beneath her feet as the group made their way off of the main roads and Rhys led them down a couple of side alleys. 

“Where is it that we are going, Rhysand?” Mor asked from behind Elain. 

“Patience.” Rhys replied, grinning over his shoulder. A moment later Elain looked over her own shoulder at Mor, Amren and Lucien who were all walking there. Mor looked anything but patient.

“I’m surprised you don’t know this part of town, Mor.” Cassian said over his shoulder, “Surprised you don’t know these dark back alleys and narrow streets…”

“Are you, just?” Mor’s voice was almost as chilled as the breeze sweeping down the streets past them, and Elain shivered again. Cassian laughed, stumbling as Azriel shoved him in the shoulder. She then watched as the two of them began some kind of back and forth scuffle, until Rhys got between them forcing them apart. 

“Are we nearly there?” Feyre asked, adjusting her collar around herself. 

“Almost.” Rhys said, smiling at his mate in the dim light. 

Shivering, Elain ran her hands up and down her arms, looking around when Lucien stepped up behind her, sliding one of his arms around her shoulders and tucking her into himself. She leaned into his warmth gratefully, wrapping an arm around his waist. “A little chilled, Petal?” he asked softly, and she nodded.

“Yes…”

“I’ll warm you up.” He bent to whisper into her ear, and Elain shivered again, this time, however, had nothing to do with the cold. 

“I’m sure you will.” She said, looking up at him.

Rhys same to a stop beside a nondescript wooden door and held up his hands for them to come closer. “Each of you will need one of these.” He made a gesture and a pile of black cloaks appeared hooked over his arm. “Everyone will be wearing one of these downstairs, as those who come to these things do tend to like to remain anonymous.”

“What kind of place is this?” Lucien asked, and Elain wasn’t sure what she could hear in his voice then. There was wariness, curiosity, and something else between the two. 

“The first interesting thing that’s come up all night.” Amren said, walking between them all on her way toward Rhys. She took a cloak from him, draping it around herself and lifting the hood to hide her face, before tugging open the wooden door and stepping inside. 

Nesta was next, moving toward Rhys. He handed her a cloak and she quickly slipped it on, pulling the hood over her head and hiding her face in shadows before stepping through the door. Cassian was hot on her heels. 

“Are we to remain anonymous?” Mor asked, and Rhys smiled wickedly at her.

“You may choose to reveal your identity to whoever you wish, Morrigan.” 

“Most,” Feyre said, turning her eyes on her friend, “do not.”

“So you come here often?” Mor asked, and Feyre’s smile matched Rhys’.

“Is this a sex club?” Azriel’s voice was uncertain and his tone blunt, and Elain’s eyes flicked to him, widening in surprise. She looked from the Shadowsinger to Rhys and then to Feyre, waiting for an answer to that question but none came. “It is, isn’t it…”

“Well…” Rhys gave a soft laugh, “Not every night.”

“And not for everyone.” Feyre added. “That’s why the cloaks are worn. You can do whatever you want, participate in whatever you like, and not worry about anybody being able to identify you.”

“I thought we came to see a performance.” Azriel said flatly, and Rhys nodded. 

“We did.”

Elain found herself edging toward the door, curiosity building within her. When she got close enough to him, Rhys’ violet eyes met hers and he smiled, offering her one of the cloaks. Taking it carefully, Elain smiled at the soft velvety feeling of the material in her hands before she slipped it over her shoulders. A flutter of black beside her told her that Lucien had put a cloak on as well and, as she turned to look at him, he reached out and lifted her hood, bringing it carefully up over her. 

“Ready, Petal?” he asked, and Elain nodded. One of his hands slid into hers, and Elain gripped it tightly. She was curious about this place, but nervousness was also swirling within her. As she moved toward the door, Lucien bent to her. “I’ve got you.” He whispered and she nodded again, squeezing his hand a little. 

With Lucien at her back, his hand still holding hers, Elain made her way down the narrow staircase inside the door. It was dark, and she made her way by feel, with her free hand on the wall down and down. She was thankful for the cloak as the air seemed to grow even cooler until they reached a dimly lit room at the bottom of the stairs. Amren and Nesta were nowhere to be seen, and neither was Cassian. 

Looking around the room, Elain took in the low lights around the walls, held in sconces. Across the other side of the room was another door and what looked to be another hallway. This seemed to be where low music and hushed voices were coming from and Elain looked up at Lucien. 

“Excited? He asked, lifting a hand to her cheek beneath her hood. 

“I think so.” She replied, “I’m not really sure what to expect here…”

“Neither am I.” he said, giving her a small smile, “But I would like to find out…” his metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked around the room behind her. 

“Were you two waiting for us?” Feyre asked, appearing beside them from the stairs, and Elain glanced at her sister. “You just head through that door and we can find some seats…”

“Okay.” Elain squeezed Lucien’s hand again and headed for the door across the room.


	239. Chapter Two Hundred and Thirty-Nine

**Chapter 239**

Sinking into a soft velvet seat, Elain leaned forward to look down at the stage at the front of the room. There was a single light on it, shining where she assumed the performer would stand when the show began, but she could see nothing else set up for the performance. Shifting her glance then, she looked around at the other figures in hooded cloaks who were coming into the room and selecting seats of their own. She could see no faces, and nobody she recognised, as was rather the point. 

A low murmuring was the only sound in the room, and Elain wondered if it was deliberate that everybody was whispering. Perhaps, she figured, they didn’t want to be identified by their voices.

“If this is a vocal performance,” Elain asked Lucien as he sank into his seat beside his mate, “Why is everyone still in cloaks trying to keep their identity secret?”

“I would think,” he replied quietly, “If they were identified or recognised here tonight then one would know they are familiar with this place.”

“…and that they come here for … _other_ … things?”

“Exactly.”

Elain met his eyes when he lifted a hand to adjust her hood so that nobody looking up at them would be able to see her. “You like this place, don’t you?” she murmured, looking at him, knowing that she was correct when he grinned. 

“It is intriguing.” He replied, and Elain continued to watch him.

“You used to come to places like this, didn’t you…”

He grinned even more widely and Elain narrowed her eyes. “Ah…”

“What did you come for?”

He blinked then, his metallic eye clicking as he held her gaze. Something reached Elain down the bond, and she tried to place the emotion while Lucien was clearly trying to work out what to say. “Oh… I… I liked the mystery of it.”

“I see…”

“Besides,” he went on, “it was nice to be anonymous, and not have everyone knowing I was a High Lord’s Son… or an exile… or whatever else they used to say about me when I was Tamlin’s emissary…”

“Did they have places like this in the Autumn Court?” Elain asked, thinking that it would be only too easy to see Eris frequenting places like this. Lucien nodded, and she could tell by the look on his face that he knew exactly what she had been thinking. “And you went there?”

“I did…” she felt one of his arms slide around her shoulders, drawing her in to his side, and his words were soothing when he spoke again. “Does that bother you, Petal?”

Elain thought for a moment before shaking her head. There was no reason that it should bother her. She had accepted that Lucien had had a life, lovers, a love in Jesminda, and all kinds of experiences before she had even been born. This was just another one of those. “No…” she told him. “It doesn’t bother me…”

“Then what is it that I’m feeling from you right now?” he asked, his eyes trained on her face, and Elain tried to work out exactly what her face was saying. She just met Lucien’s curious gaze, sifting through her emotions, attempting to figure out exactly what it was that she was feeling. 

“I… I…” glancing around the room again, she took in the velvet chairs, and curtains, and the mysterious drama of it all. “…I am curious…” she breathed, “It seems so intriguing….”

“A little bit sexy, isn’t it?” he smirked, brushing his lips against her cheek. She nodded, running one of her hands down his thigh. Lucien looked down at her in surprise and she smiled up at him. “Ahh…” he breathed, “It seems you’ve discovered one of the liberating benefits of anonymity.” 

“And what’s that?” Elain asked, moving her hand up again. 

“Those who feel they can’t be identified, who are anonymous, find themselves experiencing boldness. They often do things they would never ordinarily do…”

“Safely hidden beneath their hoods…” Elain smiled. 

“Sometimes masks.” Lucien added and she nodded again.

“That does make sense.” She watched his face as she ran her hand up and down his thigh again, pleased to see that it was distracting him. “So… what kinds of bold things did you do when you came to these types of places before…?” She wondered, just for a moment, if he had come with Jesminda, but she pushed that thought away. 

“A bit of this and that.” He replied, eyes moving across her face. He must have seen her dissatisfaction with that answer, because he went on. “I am much more interested in seeing what you and I can get up to here…”

“Is it common?” she asked him quietly, “Couples coming together?” 

“Well, it’s less common than coming in the hopes of finding someone to have fun with… but it does happen.” He leaned toward her, lips brushing her ear beneath the hood, “I rather think your sister and Rhys come here together often…” 

Elain’s gaze shifted past her mate to where Feyre and Rhys had settled into their seats, their eyes focused on the stage beneath. Glancing down at the stage, Elain wondered idly what other shows those two had come to see together. “I think you’re right.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time, Petal.” There was a slight snicker to his voice, and Elain gripped his thigh tightly with her hand, enjoying the way that his voice seemed to catch in his throat.

“I’m hopeful we might be able to touch on a few first times here tonight…” she purred, and utterly loved the way that Lucien’s heartbeat in her head just about tripled in pace. 

“And just what do you mean by that, Petal?” he asked, voice tight.

“Oh, I don’t know, my love.” She replied, “It’s my first time here. You’ll have to show me how things work…”

“I am sure that I can manage that.”

Elain smiled, leaning into him as she continued to caress his thigh. As skirling music began to drift up from the stage, Elain turned her eyes down to watch. The light was still focused on the centre of the dark stage, and it was still several moments before a small dark faerie stepped into the centre of the light.


	240. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty

**Chapter 240**

As the vocalist on the stage sang, Lucien kept an eye on Elain out of the corner of his eye. His mate sat on the edge of her seat, elbows on her knees and chin in her hands as she peered down at the stage. Her eyes were intent upon the singer, and he could feel her awe at the beautiful voice that echoed through the dark room. Part of him was surprised that Elain seemed so interested in this place, but another part of him recognised that in his mate and pushed at him to help her explore it. There was a part of Elain that would be completely into what this place had to offer, and he had been enjoying getting to meet that side of her for a good while now. 

Turning slightly to Rhys who was sitting to Lucien’s right, he nudged the High Lord of the Night Court with his knee. “This place…” he murmured when Violet eyes flicked his way, “does it work like others like it in other Courts…?”

Rhys gave a barely perceivable nod, his eyes going back to the stage, and Lucien sat back in his seat to think about that. He let his eyes run the perimeter of the room, taking in the black doors that he had not noticed until he had looked for them. If what Rhys had confirmed was correct, this club was a labyrinth of different rooms offering all different kinds of things. Those doors would be locked until the end of the main performance for the evening, and then whoever wished to stay could wander from room to room partaking in whatever was on offer and whatever struck their fancy. Going off what he had seen before, Lucien suspected there would be group activities, other performance activities which offered audience participation, and all kinds of other specialised things that may interest a wide range of different tastes. 

Looking at Elain again, Lucien wondered what her reactions would be when he took her through some of those doors. He wondered if she might like to participate in whatever they found beyond, or if she would prefer to watch as many often did. Feeling his pulse quicken as he pondered what might happen, Lucien saw Elain’s dark eyes flick his way and he knew that she had noticed his heartbeat change. He gave her a soft smile, and her return smile heated the blood pumping through him. When she reached a hand out to him, Lucien took it, watching her as she returned her attention to the vocalist below, and he settled back, holding her hand in his as he let himself focus on the song, enjoying the performance.

When the stage went dark, Lucien stayed in his seat. Elain turned toward him, and he ran his thumb over the back of her hand, keeping it in his lap. “What happens now?” she asked, and Lucien slanted a look at her. Below, some of the audience were getting to their feet while others remained in place. 

“Anyone who wishes to leave will do so now.” He told her quietly, “Anyone who wishes to stay…” he made a gesture toward the walls, “will wait until those doors are unlocked…”

“And what’s behind those doors?”

“Well, Petal.” He purred, “I guess you’ll have to wait and see…”

Around them, Azriel, Feyre and Rhys got to their feet. Lucien looked up and watched them slowly making their way along the row toward the aisles. Moments later Nesta, Amren, Mor and Cassian followed them, and Lucien realised that he and Elain were alone in their row. 

“Petal…” he asked, voice gentle. He stroked Elain’s hand again as she looked around at him. “Do you want to leave, or would you like to stay?” He didn’t want to assume that she was ready for this, or that she even wanted it. 

Elain wrapped her fingers around his wrist, looking at him from beneath her hood, and he met her eyes. “I… want to see.” She said softly.

“Alright.” Lucien held her hand in his lap, watching as more and more of the audience left the room, heading back out to the stairs from which they had come. The lights in the room dimmed even further when the crowd had thinned out, and soft music began to play from every corner of the room. Elain was looking around with interest, and Lucien could feel her curiosity. 

“The others all left…” she said, “I thought at least Feyre and Rhys would stay.”

“Maybe they’ve seen it all.” He replied, “Or they had plans for this evening.”

Below, some of those who had remained were now getting to their feet and moving toward the doors which were now evidently unlocked. Getting to his own hand, Lucien held Elain’s hand loosely in his. “… Lady.” He murmured, “Will you join me?”

“I will.” Elain stood up, increasing her grip on Lucien’s hand and he gave a small courtly bow. 

“Then let us proceed.”

He took her down to the main gallery floor and they walked silently, anonymously, toward the first of the black doors. Beside him, Elain’s curiosity grew stronger, as did her grip on his hand and he paused when they reached the door. “Are you still interested, Petal?” he asked, unable to see her face with the hood falling as it was. She nodded, holding his hand tightly, and Lucien pushed the door open with his free hand. The music was different from inside, and Lucien let Elain move ahead of him. 

Following her, he kept his grip on her hand, trying to keep his focus on her reactions, both physical and down the bond. This was not something he wished to push on her, and he promised himself that, at the first sign of her reluctance, he would get Elain out and take her back to the Town House. 

When she stopped walking, Lucien moved to stand beside her. He could feel her shock, and he looked at what was before them. An Illyrian lay on his back on a low stage, completely naked, and a faerie in one of the black cloaks they all wore knelt before him. Lucien watched as the black hood bobbed up and down, the Illyrian gripping the black cloth upon which he lay. Elain’s hand tightened on Lucien’s when the faerie got up and moved away, and another member of the audience who had been standing nearby moved to take their place. The Illyrian groaned in appreciation and Lucien shifted his gaze to Elain once more.

He could still feel the shock coming from her, and he was just about to ask her if she wanted to leave, when she looked up at him and grinned.

“What else?” she asked.


	241. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-One

**Chapter 241**

Unable to keep looking at the faerie kneeling before the Illyrian, Elain let Lucien lead her across the room and to a different door. She watched that hood bobbing up and down, listening to the Illyrian’s choked breathing and soft groans. Whoever was beneath that hood was obviously good at what they were doing. She turned around when Lucien opened the next door, and she tried to ready herself for whatever they would find through there. Shaking her head at herself, Elain realised that she had no idea how to do that when she had no idea what else they would come across.

There was another stage inside the room when she and Lucien walked in. This one was low and more of a small platform. The few audience members in cloaks who had come into the room stood around the stage silently, watching and waiting, and Elain moved with Lucien to do the same. Her eyes followed two hooded faeries who stepped onto the platform, and she watched them remove their clothing from beneath the cloaks. Lucien’s hand on her arm tightened a little, sliding down to her hand and she gripped his hand when the two faeries beginning their performance on the stage wrapped around one another, sinking down to the ground. Tilting her head, she wondered for only a moment what they were about to do, when she realised. 

“They’re actually just going to have sex in front of us all?” she murmured to Lucien who nodded beneath his hood. Elain blinked at him, her eyes then going back to the stage. She felt the excitement in the room building and the members of the audience around them shifted a little beneath their cloaks, shuffling closer to the stage. She could hear murmuring from them and several of them reached out to touch one another. When one of them stepped toward her, Elain shrank away, stepping into Lucien, her hands pulling at him. Her mate immediately wrapped an arm around her, pulling her back into his chest and holding her close to himself and, feeling safer, Elain kept her eyes on the stage. She could watch like this, she figured. Only having ever walked in on others by accident, watching with intent seemed foreign to her and she wasn’t sure if it was the secrecy of the cloaks and hoods or not, but the mystery made it more exciting. 

Pressing back against Lucien, Elain listened to her mate’s heartbeat in her head as she watched the couple on the stage. She knew that the cloaks they still wore probably made things difficult for them, but Elain rather thought that she and Lucien had more interesting sex. That thought had barely crossed her mind when the couple sat up for a moment and reached a hand out toward the closest audience member. Lucien’s arm around Elain tightened when that audience member willingly stepped onto the stage with the couple, sinking down to join them. Gasping slightly, Elain couldn’t look away as one of the faeries on the stage moved aside, encouraging the new participant to take their place atop the other faerie. 

The murmuring from the audience increased, growing to almost a hum, as the new participant on the stage set about taking part in the activities with clear vigour. Many of those watching shuffled even closer to the stage, but Elain turned toward Lucien, looking up at him as he still held her close. 

“Are you finished in here, Petal?” he asked, and she nodded. The concept, she figured, was interesting enough, but while the original couple being together with others watching had been interesting enough to her, the idea of letting randoms replace one of them to fuck the other just held no appeal for Elain. “Not into exhibitionism?” 

She figured she would explain just that to him. “An actual couple is different to meaningless fucking of someone you don’t even know.” She said. Lucien tilted his head, looking at her. “Not that I actually want to… “ she began, “but I can kind of see the appeal if it were us…” she paused to think for a moment, “I can theoretically see the appeal of having others watch and see how much I enjoy you, or how much I can make you enjoy me…” she grinned at him, “That… has appeal. But, letting someone else come and take your place?” Elain made a face, her stomach turning at the thought. “That’s just… no… and having an audience to that? Even worse.” 

Lucien’s hand slid under her hood, his fingers brushing against her cheek. “I understand that.” He told her gently, “Also, I doubt I could ever let somebody else touch you.”

“Ah…” Elain leaned into his chest, looking up at him with a smile, “I feel the same way.”

“Do you want to move on to the next room?” he asked, and Elain thought about it for a moment before she nodded. 

“Yes.” She replied, “Might as well see what’s going on…”

They headed for the door and through without issue. The light was even more dim in the next room, and Elain paused at the sounds that were echoing off of the walls. She felt Lucien pause for a second as he took in what was happening around them and then he cleared his throat a little. 

“Don’t make eye contact with anyone.” He told her in a low voice, “Don’t so much as look at anyone for too long, and definitely don’t touch anyone.”

Letting her eyes sweep the dark room, looking for the next door, and trying her best not to look at the giant orgy taking place around them, Elain strained to see much at all. She was a bit thankful for that, as an orgy definitely didn’t appeal to her at all. When she spotted a door, she pointed it out to Lucien and they very carefully picked their way across the room stepping over various limbs and writing bodies making all kinds of sounds.

The door led them to a long hallway, shadowy and richly carpeted. Lucien drew Elain around to face him in the light and she looked up at him when he dipped his head to meet her eyes. “Your choice, Petal.” He said, “More? Or home?”

“We could stay a little longer…”

“Alright. Then pick a door, Love.”


	242. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Two

**Chapter 242**

Lucien found it all too easy to watch Elain, to keep himself focused on her instead of the different scenes they walked in on in the various rooms. He wanted to make sure that she didn’t overdo herself, that she wasn’t wishing they could leave without saying anything. Without her, he would have been all too happy to wander for a while, taking in all that was on offer, but with Elain by his side, her hand in his, she was all he saw. 

He made sure to keep himself attuned to her mood, her heartbeat, her expressions. She had shown absolutely no interest in the orgy they had come across, but had wanted to see what else they could find. Elain had appeared happy to look but showed no inclination to do more or participate in anything as they had strolled from room to room, passing dancing performances, group sex, some bondage play. She had stopped for a while to watch that last one, and he had felt her excitement as one of the performers had spent considerable time in tying their partner up. There had been slow movements and careful explanation of everything they were doing to prepare for what would come after, and Elain had stood and watched. He could see her listening to every word with rapt attention, and he could feel her thrill. Her heart had begun to quicken in his head, and heat seemed to emanate from her.

Not wanting his mate to feel hurried to move on, Lucien had stood beside her, watching the scene before them. There was some elaborate knotwork that he found interesting, as it seemed like the faeries presenting this little show were completely into the styling of what they were doing and not, as he had seen in some Courts before, simply doing it for show before getting to the fucking. This was being done properly, and he found himself listening nearly as intently as Elain was to their explanations. He slid an arm around her shoulders when she leaned into him, resting her head against his shoulder, and they stood that way, taking in everything being presented to them with eager ears. 

It was as if the presenters had noticed their interest, and understood that he and Elain were legitimately interested in what they were doing, because the one currently restraining his partner’s legs seemed to be directing most of his discussion their way now. When Elain asked a question about the type of material appropriate to use to bind someone so as to not damage skin, Lucien nearly died where he stood. He spent the next five or so minutes lost in his own head, wondering if she intended to tie him up or if she wanted to be restrained herself. Thinking about the way she definitely liked having his hand around her throat, he thought he knew the answer to that. 

Once the practical instruction had been completed, Lucien had thought the couple on the little stage would have gone straight for the sex, but they didn’t. Elain had leaned more heavily against Lucien as they’d watched, and the faerie who had been tied up was made to endure some fairly intense teasing. 

“This entire thing is about anticipation…” Elain murmured, and Lucien nodded, trailing his fingers up her arm beneath her cloak. 

“Yes…” he breathed, “It’s almost ritualistic. There’s the process of restraint, and then this… touching… building the desire, the need for more, for release…”

“Knowing it’s coming.” Elain added, “just not yet…”

Lucien breathed in deeply, inhaling Elain’s scent, enjoying the lavender of her hair. It wasn’t just the bondage that built anticipation and tension, he could feel it now. He knew that when he got Elain out of here, when they had their own space and some privacy, that there was going to be no keeping them off of one another. He had promised her earlier, he recalled, but that desire was even stronger now. 

*

Lucien’s hands kept moving over her, and Elain smiled. She could feel his desire barrelling into her down the bond, and she found it difficult to pay attention to the demonstration in front of them. Her mate was just about going crazy with need for her, and she didn’t know how much longer he was going to be able to keep it leashed for. 

Sure, she reasoned, he had been able to do just that for months before she had allowed him to touch her, but he hadn’t had to wear that leash for quite some time, and she wondered if he would be able to tighten it again. Smiling at the thought of Lucien in an actual leash, Elain turned away from the scene on the stage and looked up at her mate. 

“Would you like to leave this room, my love?” she asked, and she would have sworn that there were actual embers behind his russet eye. 

“Mmm…” both of Lucien’s hands slid down her back and over her arse, gripping her and lifting her to himself. Elain could feel him hard and ready even through their clothing and cloaks, and she heard the soft growl in his throat as he pressed her to himself. “Yes…”

“Where would you like to go?” she asked, and he stepped away, lifting his head and looking around. 

“Why don’t we begin with that door…” he said, indicating the door that would take them back out into the hallway. Elain nodded and, an instant later, Lucien was pulling her across to that door. She listened to Lucien’s heartbeat, racing now as he struggled to get himself under control, and she couldn’t help but smile in anticipation for whatever was to come. There was no hiding that he wanted her, no denying that fact at all, and she wanted him. The only question was if he was going to be able to make it back to the Town House before he slipped. 

Elain allowed Lucien to pull her around to face himself out in the hallway. “Lucien…” she murmured, gazing up at him, another smile touching her lips. Lifting a hand, she slid it beneath his hood to cup his cheek, her thumb tracing over his scar. 

“Where do you want to go?” he asked, a low guttural quality to his voice. 

“Well…” Elain could feel the primal drive urging him on, pushing him for more, to touch her and, as his hands moved over her, clutching at her and pulling her to himself, she realised that the same need was coursing through her own blood. “I’m sure there’s somewhere here with a little privacy…”

Lucien’s hand closed around Elain’s wrist then, and he was walking down the hall, pulling her with him as he went. She tried to keep pace with his lengthy strides, barely noticing the hooded figures that they passed in the flickering light. “There are usually smaller rooms at the back…” Lucien said, “For… this … kind of … privacy…”

She watched as his free hand moved over the wall, passing door after door, and he paused for only a moment each time before moving onto the next. After a moment of this, he stopped and listened. Elain’s breath caught in her throat as he then pushed that door open and pulled her inside.


	243. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Three

**Chapter 243**

Elain’s back hit the wall as the door clicked shut and she gasped into the dark as Lucien’s hands found her again and he lifted her to himself. There was soft music playing from somewhere within the room and it was all she could hear apart from Lucien’s breathing and his heartbeat. 

“Are these rooms soundproof?” she asked, voice shaky. If she couldn’t hear anything from outside of them or in the next rooms she figured they must be. 

“It would make sense.” Lucien replied, lifting her from the ground. She felt his hands pulling at her cloak and she pushed it back from her face, allowing him to loosen it before dropping it by them. Elain then set about trying to remove his cloak from him, pushing it from his shoulders when she’d gotten it free. 

Her mate had gotten his hands under the skirts of her dress and when her legs were free, Elain wrapped them around his waist, pleased to find that he had somehow undone the laces of his pants in everything else that had been going on. Lucien’s heart was racing, and she could feel the heat coming from him as he pressed his lips to hers. Grinning into the kiss, Elain wrapped her arms around Lucien’s shoulders, thinking about what they had just been told about in that last room. The performance had been very informative, and she had learned quite a few interesting pieces of information. These were all things that she wanted to remember in order to use later.

She knew that Lucien had been watching her throughout the performance, but she had felt when his own interest had been piqued. She supposed he must have been into something of the sort if he had frequented these places before. Knowing that Feyre and Rhys had also been here before was an interesting piece of information also, and Elain made a brief mental note to ask her sister what she liked about the place before she decided to push her sister from her mind altogether for now. 

When one of Lucien’s hands went between her legs, Elain gasped, sliding her fingers into her mate’s hair. She had known that he would end up like this by the way he had pulled her out into the hallway earlier, and she was surprised he had lasted this long without jumping her. 

“Did you like what you saw earlier?” She asked, trying to keep her voice light and carefree. Lucien grunted, his hand at her waist tightening. 

“I know you did.” He breathed, “I can smell it on you…”

“Ah…”

His fingers moved between her legs. “And I can feel it…”

“Yes.” She knew that she was wet. She had been for quite a while. Lucien made a pleased sound and adjusted her against the wall, and Elain had only a moment to brace herself before he’d pushed himself inside of her. She gasped, the sound being cut off when Lucien’s mouth came down over hers, and she licked at him when he tried to deepen the kiss. His laugh pleased her, and she tightened her hand in his hair, encouraging him to move as she tightened her legs around his waist 

An instant later he’d begun his familiar steady rhythm, thrusting into Elain, holding her pinned against the wall. Elain closed her eyes, whimpering into Lucien’s kiss as he kept his lips firmly over hers as he moved. She listened to her mate’s heartbeat, each steady thump in her head in sync with the movement of his hips, and she knew when her own heart raced to match his. Elain could feel the urgency within her mate, knew that it was that primal force within him pushing him on when his hands on her were rougher than usual. He didn’t hurt her, she knew that he never would, but she also recognised that this was not what he had told her, and that she knew, he liked.

Clinging to him, Elain continued to whimper, the only sounds she made trying to urge him on. Her blood was singing in her veins, and she could feel her hips trying to move to meet him. She forgot about where they were or who might be nearby, and she knew that they had all the time in the world, but something about the hurried nature of this was exciting. Lucien was groaning into her mouth, and when she reached her edge, she gave a small shriek, tugging at his hair enjoying the way that he began to shudder. 

The next thing Elain knew they were on the floor. Her back was still against the wall, but she and Lucien were kind of sprawled on the floor, tangled together and she was trying to catch her breath. 

“Are you ready to go back to the Town House, Petal?” he murmured, his hand rubbing her back softly, and Elain nodded. 

“I think so…” she replied, tilting her head back against the wall and noticing the slow music still playing from the darkness. “Unless you’d like to see more…”

“I think I’ve seen enough.” He said, and she could hear a smile in his voice. She looked at him, able to see him only faintly in the dim light. 

“Oh really?” she asked, her own voice teasing.

“Of what this place has to offer.” He replied, “There is more I wish to see of you…”

“Maybe after we’ve had a bath…” she said, reaching for her cloak and pulling it on. 

“Yes… maybe try not to think about what could be on this carpet…”

Elain shuddered, and pushed at his arm, before getting to her feet. “I hadn’t thought about it at all until you opened your mouth.”

“You’re welcome.”

Elain handed Lucien his cloak and they both spent a minute making sure that they were both properly dressed and covered before opening the door and slipping back out into the hallway. “Do we have to do anything before we leave…?” she asked, and Lucien shook his head. 

“No… We can just slip out…”Nodding, Elain followed him as they wandered the hallways trying to find some stairs that would take them back up onto the street. By the time they found it, Elain was happy to step out into the cool night air, and she went to push her hood back before Lucien stopped her. “Maybe,” he suggested, “We wait until we are a few streets away before taking the hoods off….”

“Good thought.” She murmured, wondering if it would be inappropriate for the sister of the High Lady of the Night Court to be seen coming out of such a place.


	244. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Four

**Chapter 244**

The sun came through the window early in the morning and Elain giggled when Lucien’s red hair disappeared beneath the sheets. She felt him moving his way down her body, lips caressing her skin, and she gave a startled shriek when she felt his teeth scrape carefully. He kissed the sensitive skin at her hips and she felt his laugh against that skin, hot and amused.   
“Lucien…” she chuckled, trying to reach beneath the sheets for him. He laughed again, holding the sheet down over her so that her hands couldn’t get beneath. 

“Just let me have my way with you, Petal.” He said, “I did promise last night that I was going to do this for you… Like that first time…”

Elain let herself slide back against the pillows, and Lucien’s hands gripped her hips. She felt those hands glide down over her skin and then his fingers slid up the inside of her thighs, parting them as he settled between. Elain let her hands fall out to the sides, gripping the bed cover as she couldn’t get her hands on her mate. Not being able to see what Lucien was doing added a new element of suspense and tension and more than a little anticipation which she found very exciting and more than a little sexy.

“Very well…” she breathed, patting the shape between her legs which she assumed was Lucien’s head beneath the blankets. His low chuckle reached her ears just a she felt the tickle of his hair against her thighs, and she set both hands back to grip the bedspread. 

Elain had just taken a small breath when she first felt Lucien’s tongue on her. She gasped, her hips jerking, but Lucien held her in place. His strong hands wrapped around her thighs, holding her open and in place as his tongue began to lick at her, exploring carefully and very deliberately. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” Elain groaned, her head falling back against the pillows and the headboard. “OH… My…”

Lucien continued to lick at her, his hot tongue seemingly sending little sparks of lightening through her body, and Elain’s hands clenched at the bedspread. She could do nothing but grip the material tightly, gasping and groaning and occasionally whimpering Lucien’s name. He was exceptionally good at this, and she loved every time he had felt the need to remind her of this fact. 

When his lips moved down to one of her inner thighs, Elain shuddered and then heard her mate’s laugh again. “Are you enjoying this, Petal?” he asked, “I can’t see your face and your beautiful expressions…”

“I’m sure you have been able to hear me.” She replied, her voice kind of weak. 

“I certainly have.” She knew that he was grinning without having to see him. “And I’ve been able to feel you down the bond.” He added, and Elain nodded. 

“That’s a new element…” she replied, wondering what kind of fun they would be able to have with that. 

“Doesn’t beat being able to watch you, though.” He said, an instant before the sheet lifted and Elain was able to look down and see Lucien grinning up at her in exactly the same way she had imagined he would be. Reaching a hand under the blanket, Elain brushed her fingers down his cheek, following the brutal scar. 

“I do agree, love.”

He winked at her, bending his head to press a kiss to her stomach, and Elain shuddered slightly, wanting more of him touching her. “Would you like some more?” he asked, voice low and almost purr-like. 

Nodding, Elain stroked his cheek again, gasping when he returned his hands to her hips. She let him read just her, and then his hands went back to pinning her thighs apart, and she enjoyed being able to watch him this time. Lucien’s lips skimmed her skin, moving up her thigh before he dipped his head between her legs and that perfect heat enveloped her again and she gave a pleased sigh, her head falling back against the pillows once more. 

*

Looking around the table, Elain eyed those she was sitting with. Many of them were avoiding the eyes of one another, and she found herself wondering why. Feyre’s eyes were also sweeping the room and, when Elain met her gaze, Feyre winked at her. Elain smiled and looked back to the others. Azriel was staring determinedly at the teacup in his hand, and Nesta’s gaze was fixed firmly upon the teapot in the middle of the table. 

“This seems a little… awkward, doesn’t it?” Lucien’s lips brushed Elain’s ear as he whispered to her and she nodded. 

“What do you think happened?” she asked, keeping her voice low enough that only Lucien would hear her.

“If I had to guess, Petal…” he paused to smirk at her, “I would guess that some of these fine folk stayed last night to explore the club as we did…”

“Ohh…” Elain looked back up the table, looking again at the Shadowsinger and then her elder sister. Cassian, however, looked completely open and fine, and Elain found herself wondering if Cassian would volunteer any information about what Nesta and himself found last night in that club. He would probably tell her if she asked. Elain had to catch herself, making herself stay quiet. 

“So, what is going on this morning?” Rhys asked after a few moments. Elain flicked her gaze toward him, watching as he buttered a scone. The High Lord of the Night Court looked completely nonchalant. “Any news?”

“Last night was fun…” Lucien put in, and Elain knew that he was grinning again, even though her gaze remained on Rhys. 

“I am pleased that you enjoyed the… performance.” Rhys replied, before taking a bite of his scone. 

“We did.” Lucien gave a low laugh and Elain felt herself blush. Everybody knew that she and Lucien had stayed after the performance to see what else was on offer. 

“Any other news?” Rhys asked, and Elain saw him smile at her expression. She was grateful for the change in topic, and even more grateful when someone took up that offer. 

“Well…” Cassian said, leaning back in his chair as he pushed his plate away from him, having finished what he had chosen for breakfast. “Nesta has decided to come and see the training camps with me for a while…”


	245. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Five

**Chapter 245**

“When did you decide this?” Elain asked, sitting on the low stone bench in the garden with Nesta and Feyre after breakfast had concluded. Everyone at the table had continued to avoid one another’s eyes for the remainder of the meal and conversation had been somewhat stilted. This both amused Elain and frustrated her.

“Not long ago.” Nesta said softly, chewing her lower lip. “He asked a while ago, and I have been trying to decide…”

“I think it’s a good idea.” Feyre said, nodding sagely. “The camps are something else…”

“It would be nice to see somewhere that Cassian speaks about so often…” Nesta twisted her hands in her lap.

“It will probably help you understand him a little more as well.”

“Most likely.” 

Elain watched her elder sister look around the garden, her light eyes thoughtful, and her posture as perfect as always with her straight back and shoulders squared. “Are you looking forward to it, Nesta?”

“I…” Nesta made a bit of a face. “Yes and no…”

“Why?”

“It will be nice, I think, to go somewhere with Cassian…” Pale eyes met Elain’s then, like you did with Lucien. Elain understood what she meant. It had been a huge step forward in her relationship with her mate, being away from everyone else, just with him. “But… the Illyrian camps…”

“Ah…” Feyre nodded.

“What about them?” Elain asked, frowning. She knew that the camps were rough, but not a whole heap other than that. 

“Let’s just say they’re not the most romantic of places…” Feyre told her. “They’re harsh…”

“In what ways?” Elain asked, “The training?”

“Remember it is a place to turn younglings into warriors.” Nesta murmured, and Feyre nodded again. Elain looked from one to the other, trying to take in the full implications of those words. She had known that the training camps would have to be some aspect of brutal, but she didn’t think she would fully comprehend what Feyre was evidently aware of without having been there.

“You’ll have to tell me about them when you get back…” She said, looking once more at her elder sister. Nesta glanced up from her hands to Elain and gave a small nod.

“I will.”

“And how long are you staying for?” The High Lady of the Night Court asked Elain. 

“Oh…” Elain twisted a piece of her hair in her fingers. “I… a couple of days? Is that alright?” she bit her lip as she met her younger sister’s eyes. “We can go if it’s an imposition?”

“Go?” Nesta asked. 

“To the Day Court.”

“Is that your home now?” Feyre asked, raising an eyebrow, and Elain thought about it for only the briefest of seconds before she nodded. 

“Lucien will be the High Lord someday…”

“And will you be the Lady of the Day Court?” Nesta asked, “or will you be the High Lady?”

Elain looked at her sisters. Both of them were watching her silently, and waiting for her answer to that question. She didn’t have an answer, though. She hadn’t thought about it. It was something that needed to be properly considered, and then discussed with Lucien. Elain didn’t know what his preference might be, although she rather thought he would be supportive of whichever she preferred. There was also the Day Court to consider. Rhys had been able to name Feyre High Lady because he knew that his Court would be behind his decision and she had no idea how supportive of such a radical idea that the Day Court might be. Although, considering Helion, she suspected they may be fairly progressive.  
“I… I don’t know.” She eventually said, voice soft, frowning gently. “We haven’t talked about that…”

“You should talk about it.” Feyre replied, “There may be things that need to be in place before that happens…”

“… Helion may live forever…” Elain replied, “He could live for another thousand years…. And he will be High Lord for that time…” The current High Lord was evidently in peak physical condition and, if nothing happened to him, then he would keep the throne.

“This is true… so if something happens to him it will likely be unexpected, and so everything will need to be ready.” Nesta placed her hands together carefully in her own lap, her eyes shifting from Elian to the pretty purple flowers growing nearby. “You should be sure.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Elain replied, wondering how she might bring that conversation up with Lucien. “I’ll talk to him about it when we get back to the Day Court.” She looked at Feyre, “Did you know that Ashk is the new Emissary for the Autumn Court in the Day Court and she lives there now?”

“Oh…” Feyre sat back in her chair in evident surprise, “I knew she was one of Eris’ emissary… I didn’t realise she’d made the move on a permanent basis.”

“Yes.” Elain smiled, her gaze sliding to Nesta who actually grinned back. “Isn’t it wonderful?”


	246. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Six

**Chapter 246**

Amren was actually giggling when Elain walked into the sitting room with her sisters. Feyre cracked a smile immediately and Nesta looked curiously at their small friend. “What has happened?” the High Lady of the Night Court asked, and Mor leaned back in her chair, grinning widely. 

“Nothing.” The blonde said.

“There has to be something.” Nesta remarked, “Amren does not giggle lightly…”

Elain sank down onto the plush armchair, running her fingers over the material and smiling at the obvious awkward air in the room. Nesta sank down on the chair to her left, while her younger sister sat beside Mor. Elain continued to stroke the armchair, enjoying the velvety feel of it beneath her fingers as her eyes moved between Amren, Mor and Azriel. Amren was still giggling a little, Mor was still grinning and Azriel was rubbing his temples looking entirely put out by the entire situation. 

“We’ve just been talking.” Mor elaborated, her grin still firmly in place across her beautiful face. 

“They’ve been speculating about what everyone did last night…” Azriel put in, sounding exasperated and kind of uncomfortable. 

“After the performance?” Nesta asked, raising one fine eyebrow. 

“About who stayed at the club.” Amren said, grinning as her eyes swept the room, looking at each of them in turn. 

“Well…” Mor said, “We thought it was interesting to consider who had stayed and who left…”

“And why would that be something to discuss…” Nesta asked, sitting with her usual immaculate posture. “Wasn’t that rather the point of wearing the cloaks? So that identity remained secret…?”

“From everyone else.” Amren said.

“But we’re family.” Mor added. “It makes sense for the High Lord and Lady to keep their activities secret when visiting places like that… but only from others who may see them. Not us.”

“Are you asking if Rhys and I stayed or came home?” Feyre asked, crossing one of her ankles over her knees.

“We were speculating.” Mor agreed.

“Why speculate?” Feyre asked, “We came home.”

“Oh…” Mor made a face, “That’s anticlimactic.”

Elain watched Mor pout for a second before glancing at Amren who gave a wicked smirk. “Of course, you two were not the only people we were speculating about.” Her eyes went to Nesta who somehow managed to sit even more straight in her seat. Nesta’s hands smoothed her dress over her knees, pretending that she didn’t know that Amren was looking at her, or that they had been speaking about her. Elain could tell that her elder sister’s breath had caught in her throat, however, and that she was very uncomfortable with that discussion. 

“Ahh yes…” Mor cut in, and Elain was certain that she saw the blonde’s eyes flick to Nesta and then quickly away a heartbeat later. “The big question was whether or not Azriel stayed.”

Azriel went rigid just as Nesta visibly relaxed, and Elain was sure that Mor had changed the focus of the group deliberately.

“We don’t need to wonder about what I did.” Azriel said, his voice sounding strange to Elain. “I came back here…”

“Did you?” Feyre chuckled, “I don’t remember seeing you…”

“Not being seen is what I do.” Azriel’s voice was now matter-of-fact, and Elain suddenly remembered walking into the dark library one night to find him in the shadows with Cerridwen. She stared at Azriel, wondering herself now if he had stayed at the club to see a little more, or if he had indeed come back to the house as he claimed. If he and Cerridwen were still… whatever they had been, would he have come back to her? 

“Ahh… but you could have been not being seen at the club…” Amren snickered, “I can imagine you slinking from room to room, avoiding eyes…”

“I slunk back here.” Azriel reiterated. “If you want details about what went on there last night, perhaps you should have stayed yourself. Or, ask someone who did.”

Elain started a little when all eyes in the room turned on her. She remembered how everyone around she and Lucien had gotten to their feet and walked away after the performance, and that they had been alone when they had gone downstairs to head through one of the doors. If they had noticed, it would have been an easy conclusion to come to, to assume that she and Lucien had stayed and, judging by the look on Mor’s face, she had come to that exact conclusion.

“Elain?” The blonde’s voice was sweet, and her smile anything but. 

Elain blinked. She didn’t know how to respond. There probably wasn’t much point in denying it, they wouldn’t believe her. They had to have known that she and Lucien stayed, so she had to decide how to handle that. Remembering the way that Lucien had once told her about his approach to things being “balls and sass”, she fixed a smile onto her own face, meeting Mor’s eyes. “Yes. Lucien and I stayed.”

Amren laughed, and Elain didn’t miss the way that Nesta looked at her. Her sister looked marginally shocked, but also intrigued. “Did you really?”

“Yes.” Elain lifted her chin. “We won’t be in the Night Court for too much longer, and it was very interesting to see what the Court offered by way of entertainment…”

“And what did you discover?” Mor asked, her voice a purr now.

“Oh… Many things.”


	247. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Seven

**Chapter 247**

Elain hadn’t expected Nesta to leave with Cassian so quickly. She had imagined that she and Lucien would have returned to the Day Court well before her sister and the Illyrian were due to leave for the training camps, so it was a surprise when Cassian announced at lunch that they would be leaving before dinner. Rhys had questioned what they were heading off so soon for, and Cassian had shrugged and said he had had word about some trouble from one of his friends that he wished to check out. Azriel had tilted his head at that news, and Rhys had raised a questioning eyebrow. Cassian had offered nothing further and the issue hadn’t been pushed. 

That meant, however, that Elain found herself in the garden as the light faded as she waited for Nesta to come and find her. Sitting on the grass beneath her favourite tree, Elain looked up at the sky watching the way that the blue faded into purples and pinks. The whole thing reminded her of the delicious ice-creams that she and her sisters had found at a cute little corner shop in Velaris. The clouds that swirled across the sky in the gentle breeze only added to the effect. It was gorgeous, and something she expected would be a regular occurrence somewhere like the Dawn Court.

Letting her gaze sweep the garden, Elain look in the pretty light that the sky was casting across the garden beds. It seemed to almost enrich the colours of the flowers, making everything even more beautiful. She wished that she had the skill to be able to draw it, and she thought she might ask Feyre if she might paint the garden for her. It would be a lovely thing to hang on the wall by her bed in the Day Court as something to remember her family by. This garden was special to her, and she did miss it. Looking up at the tree then, Elain smiled. This place was also significant in her relationship with Lucien. They had spent a lot of time beneath this tree out here together, and it would be especially meaningful to have it captured in art on her wall. 

Hearing the door open, Elain looked around and watched as Nesta strolled across the grass toward her. Her sister’s long blue dress was gorgeous, and Elain found herself smiling as she took in Nesta’s relaxed expression. She didn’t look at all nervous about the fact that she was about to leave with Cassian for the Illyrian training camps. Elain knew that she certainly would be nervous if she had been the one going. Nesta showed nothing of the kind, however. 

“Are you ready to leave?” she asked, when Nesta reached her and sat down beside her on the grass.

“Soon enough.” Her sister replied. “I have packed all that I will need… Cassian is just speaking with Rhys.”

“Do you know what the trouble he mentioned is?”

“Not really.” Nesta said, a light frown crossing her features. “He said that a friend of his contacted him and asked for help…”

“So he’s going straight up there to help…?”

“Yes.”

Elain nodded and looked her sister over again. “Did you pack warmly?”

“Yes.” Nesta nodded, “I am glad I bought a couple of things in the Winter Court, to be honest.”

“I’m sure you are.” Elain grinned a little, “I’m certain Cassian will keep you warm, though…” She very much enjoyed the way that Nesta’s eyes widened and a blush stained her cheeks. 

“I…” Nesta fell silent, clearly not knowing what to say.

“Did you stay last night?” Elain asked, curious. “At the club…?”

“No…” her elder sister bit her lip. “Was it… fun?”

Elain nodded. “There were a lot of different things to…see…” she tilted her head, “I’m sure everyone could find something they were interested in.”

Nesta looked thoughtful for a moment, “Perhaps when I get back…”

Elain choked down a giggle, and they both looked around when Feyre headed their way. “Are you two bonding without me?” the High Lady of the Night Court asked, and Elain grinned, leaning back on her elbows. She gestured for Feyre to sit, and then gestured around the garden. 

“Would you paint this for me, Feyre?” she asked. “It is so beautiful here at this time of day… I miss this place. Would you paint the garden for me so that I can have it on my wall…?”

Feyre’s eyes swept the garden taking in the flowers and the tree and the sky. They then returned to Elain. “It is much lovelier out here since you have been working on it.” She said, “I will, of course, paint for you.”

“Thank you.” Elain smiled, pleased. 

“Cassian is finished speaking with Rhys and said he would meet you in the hall by the door.” This was directed at Nesta who nodded. Elain thought she might have seen the briefest flicker of nervousness across her elder sister’s face then, but it was gone in an instant and she couldn’t be entirely sure that it had nee there at all. “Are you ready?”

“I am.” Nesta got slowly to her feet, brushing the grass from her dress. Elain and Feyre followed her up and then the three of them headed inside. Elain thought about how they were about to see Nesta off on a trip alone with Cassian to Illyrian training camps. If somebody had have told her a year ago that this would happen, she would have thought they had lost their senses entirely. Yet, here they wore and it was happening and it didn’t seem at all wrong or surprising to her.

Cassian stood by the door, several packs at his feet, and Elain watched as he smiled when Nesta approached. He reached a hand out for her and Nesta crossed to him. The rest of them collected by the doors to the sitting rooms and the foot of the stairs, and they watched as Cassian and Nesta picked up their things. 

“You’re off now?” Azriel asked, and Cassian nodded in his direction. “Let me know if you need assistance…”

“Will do.”

“When will you be back?” Feyre asked, and Nesta glanced toward Cassian for his response. He shook his head for a moment. 

“It depends on how quickly I can get things sorted out.”

“Fair enough.”

“I’ll probably be gone by the time you return.” Elain said, moving closer to hug her sister. Nesta wrapped her arms tightly around her. “You are welcome to visit whenever you like.”

“And I hope you come visit me.”

“I will, of course.”

Stepping back, Elain was thankful for Lucien’s arm when it wrapped around her shoulders and she leaned into her mate as the others all bid their farewells. She couldn’t stop watching Nesta and being surprised at the apparent ease in her sister. She was so very pleased that Nesta seemed to confident and sure of herself in this situation. She was sure there had to be some uncertainty, but while that had used to come out in coldness and indifference, it wasn’t now. Nesta looked happy.


	248. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Eight

**Chapter 248**

_Nesta eyed the small cabin she would be staying in with Cassian, her eyes moving critically over it. It was cute enough, she supposed, but that wasn’t all that important overall. There had been a large fireplace inside, and Cassian had gotten a roaring fire started within minutes. The heat of the fire had quickly dispelled the cold within the cabin, and she had almost been surprised when they had gone back outside into the icy wind. As she took a step away from the cabin, Nesta’s eyes swept over it. It was only small, and she had at first been worried about being locked in there with Cassian for however long they were here for. As the minutes passed, however, she was relaxing to the idea and it seemed almost cosy to her now._

_The bedroom had been tiny, barely space for a bed and a table beside it. She hadn’t been sure if they would be sharing a room or not as they didn’t in the Night Court and that hadn’t yet been a part of their relationship. One bedroom in the cabin seemed to make that fairly clear however. The idea both thrilled and worried Nesta. She did really like the idea of being able to curl up beside Cassian of a night, to have his warm arms to wrap around her against the chill outside. But, she thought, she was worried that she might get a bit snippy without her own space. She had always needed space and time away from others in order to decompress. If she didn’t have that time she was concerned that she might say or do something to Cassian that she would regret._

_As smoke curled from the chimney only to be ripped away by icy winds, Nesta turned to face the little path that she and Cassian would be taking into the little town nearby. He walked beside her and she was surprised by how silent he was being. Until now, she hadn’t thought that he was capable of such a thing._

_“Is something wrong?” she asked, eyeing him in her periphery. Cassian cocked his head to the side, eyeing her in return._

_“What makes you think that?”_

_“You’re rather quiet.”_

_“I…” he shrugged and gestured around them, “being back here always brings back memories.”_

_Nesta nodded. “Ah…” she couldn’t help a small smile when he took one of her hands in his as they walked. His large hand felt strong and was pleasantly warm in the cold wind._

_“Did you get that cloak when you visited the Winter Court?” he asked, and she smiled._

_“Yes.”_

_“Lucky…”_

_He fell silent again after that as they approached the main street and Nesta turned her own attention to looking at the shops. There were all the usual things, clothing, food, supplies. She eyed what appeared to be a shop selling weapons out of the corner of her eye. This looked like a simple town, as she had imagined it would. She hadn’t been expecting luxuries of any kind up here, and it didn’t appear that she would find any._

_“So what are we going to be doing here?” she asked, wondering yet again what trouble he had been referring to._

_“I’m hoping being a presence will be enough.” He replied. Nesta eyed him and he raised an eyebrow at her. “Devlon is away.” He added, “He’s been gone for over a week apparently, and there have been raids…”_

_“From other camps?” Nesta asked, and he nodded._

_“Creeping down here, often during the day to harass the women running their businesses… thinking they can take what they want…”_

_“Because Devlon isn’t here?”_

_“And the men he took with him…”_

_“Where is he?”_

_“Nobody here knows…”_

_Nesta frowned, thinking about that. If the Lord and his men were absent, she could well believe that opportunists from other camps would feel entitled to come down here and help themselves to whatever they liked. “So, you’re going to put a stop to whatever is happening in their absence…”_

_“That’s the idea.”_

_“Alright…” Nesta lifted her chin as they strode down the main street and Illyrians on both sides of the road came outside to look at them. They all knew who Cassian was, she knew that, but she hadn’t expected the whispering when they saw her. It wasn’t clear if they knew that she was the sister of the High Lady of the Night Court or not, or perhaps they were just excited by seeing her at Cassian’s side. Either way, she didn’t want to be seen as anything other than formidable._

_Cassian led her to a small clothing store, and Nesta looked at the rack by the front door. Several long skirts of multiple colours hung there and she lifted one up to look at it better. Lightweight and well made. Whoever had sewn it had obvious talent. When Cassian opened the door and went inside, Nesta followed him. She looked at the young Illyrian woman behind the counter whose eyes were wide for a moment until she evidently recognised Cassian and she smiled._

_“You’ve come.”_

_“Of course, Emerie.” He replied. “Your letter didn’t seem to give me much of a choice…”_

_The young Illyrian seemed to blanch at that. “I… didn’t mean to sound demanding.” She said._

_“Nor did you.” Cassian replied, smiling widely at her, “I did say you could let me know when you needed help.”_

_Nesta approached until she was standing beside Cassian and she watched Emerie adjust her stance. “Some of the women…” the young Illyrian hesitated, “they’re not so good at standing up for themselves when they come…”_

_“We’ll see to that.” Cassian stood a little straighter and then wrapped an arm around Nesta’s shoulders, “This is Nesta.”_

_“Hello…” Emerie smiled in a friendly manner and Nesta returned the smile. This was something she thought she might be able to help with. She could definitely work with some of these women to help them feel more confident in themselves and able to stand up for themselves when these men came to take what did not belong to them. Cassian would obviously be all too good at this as well, and she was pleased that she thought she might actually be able to contribute to what they had come to do, and be of quality assistance._

_“Shall we get started?” She asked._

*

Elain sat up with a stretch, Lucien sprawled at her side. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked up at her, his vibrant hair still splayed out across his pillow. “Did you have an interesting dream, Petal?” he asked, and Elain smiled at him. 

“I think I saw Nesta…”

“In your dream?”

“I don’t think it was a dream.”

“Oh…” he sat up, and her eyes moved over his bare chest. “What was she doing?”

“She and Cassian are going to help some of the women in the camp defend themselves against raiders…”

Lucien looked thoughtful as he nodded. “That sounds like them…”

“It does.” Elain swung her feet around and off the bed and got to her feet. “Maybe we can go up there one day…”

“You want to see the camps?”

“Yes…”

Lucien nodded again, getting to his own feet. “Alright…” he grabbed his clothing for the day. “I’m sure Helion could find something to send us up there for…”

“Excellent.”


	249. Chapter Two Hundred and Forty-Nine

**Chapter 249**

Elain was still smiling about her dream when she went down to breakfast later that morning. Lucien was already seated by the time she got down there and she sat beside him, grinning. Feyre poured herself a cup of tea before looking across the table at Elain and lifting her cup to her lips. Elain watched her sister take a sip of the tea, waiting for whatever it was that Feyre wanted to say to her. It was clear that there was something as the room was just about silent, with the exception of Rhys crunching a bit of toast. 

“Lucien said you had a vision of Nesta?” Feyre asked as she set her cup of tea down. 

“It was a dream…”

“Likely more than a dream…” Lucien put in. Elain flicked a glance at him and then back to Feyre with a nod. It likely had been more than a dream.

“Yes, I think it was a vision of the present…” Elain added, “What she and Cassian were doing…”

“Are they alright?” Feyre asked, her pale eyes flicking from Elain to Rhys and back again. 

“Yes…” Elain nodded, “They were speaking to an Illyrian female who was working in a clothing store…” She paused to think back on her dream for a moment, “I was seeing it through Nesta’s eyes, as if I were her…”

“Is that not the way it usually is?” Rhys asked, reaching for another piece of toast. “With your visions?”

“Not usually.” Elain said, “Most often I am myself, as a visitor to another’s memory… if it is a vision of the past.”

“Perhaps because it was in the present…” Feyre put in.

“I don’t know.” Elain replied, “It is different every now and again.” She reached for the teapot in the centre of the table and picked it up. Lucien placed two empty teacups before her and she set about pouring the golden liquid into both. “It is always for a purpose, though.” She added, “Every time I see something, it seems to have bene shown to me for a reason.”

“And what might this reason be?” Rhys asked, and Elain bit her lip. She looked at Lucien for a moment before back to her sister’s mate. 

“Maybe I am supposed to go and help?” she asked, trying to sound confident. Rhys raised an eyebrow and looked at Elain for a second. 

“Do you think so?”

“I don’t know.” She admitted. Lucien’s hand wrapped around hers beneath the table and she smiled at him for a moment. Elain could feel Lucien’s surprise at her idea, but beyond that she could feel his support. If she thought that she was meant to go to the Illyrian Camps then he would go with her, as she knew that he would. 

“Az?” Rhys asked, and the Shadowsinger gave a one shouldered shrug. 

“I did receive a letter from Cassian this morning.”

“What did it say?” Lucien asked, “Is something the matter?”

“He asked me to come and offer some assistance.” Azriel said, “Apparently my skills would be of benefit.”

“If they need help, then maybe that is exactly why Elain had that dream.” Lucien said, and Elain nodded her agreement. This seemed to be exactly the purpose of that dream. If Nesta and Cassian were about to try and held the whole camp of females stand up for themselves and resist whoever was coming down in raids to help themselves to whatever they liked, then the more help they had the better. “Perhaps…” Lucien went on, and Elain turned her head to meet his eyes, both russet and gold, “we might go and see if we can help before we head back to the Day Court?”

“Yes.” Elain nodded, lifting her tea cup and taking a sip. “I think that is a great idea.” She squeezed her mate’s hand beneath the table with her free hand, and he gave her a small smile by way of acknowledgement. “Would anyone have any objections to that?” Lucien asked. Elain looked around the table, pleased to see heads being shaken. 

“You may come with me.” Azriel said after a moment. “I will be going up there by lunch. I just need to get a few things sorted…”

“That sounds like a plan.” Lucien nodded, his eyes returning to Elain as he raised a questioning eyebrow. She nodded her agreement. That did sound like a plan. 

“Will you come?” She asked Feyre who bit her lip. 

“I suppose I could…” Feyre looked to Rhys who shook his head.

“You go, I have things to see to…”

“Very well.” Feyre said, “I could spare a day or so to see what Cassian needs help with.”

Elain thought about her dream again, and she supposed that the High Lady of the Night Court would probably be an excellent person to be convincing some of the females of the camp that they did not have to give up anything that was demanded of them from those on the raids. She wondered how that would go with neither she nor her sisters being Illyrian. Would they be listened to, or dismissed? Cassian and Azriel’s opinions would have weight, however. She just hoped that that would be enough.


	250. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty

**Chapter 250**

Lucien watched Elain fasten the pale blue cloak he had given her around her shoulders, and he smiled. She was clearly keen to see the Illyrian camp, and that excitement was just about contagious. He hoped that the vision she’d had did mean that she was meant to go and help her sister, otherwise he suspected that they would be getting in the way. Part of him suspected that they would not be welcomed in the town, and he hoped that the sudden presence of a couple of High Fae did not rub the local Illyrians the wrong way. If they were already under duress, he didn’t think they might take too kindly to High Fae showing up and, perhaps in their eyes, telling them what to do. 

“Are you going to look for some exciting new flowers?” he asked, grinning at his mate who turned her dark eyes on him with a smile of her own. 

“Well, I think it may be habit now…” she nodded, “But it’s kind of a relief that there’s no more pressure to do so for the book…”

“Just your own interest, then.” He said, bending to pick up his pack as Elain did the same, nodding again. He settled the strap over his shoulder, looking down at her. Lucien could see the excitement built, and the light in her eyes grow brighter as she thought about it. 

“I imagine there might be lots of mountain flowers that I’ve not seen before…”

“It’s likely.” He agreed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and leading her out the door and down the stairs to where Azriel would be meeting them to take them to the Illyrian Camp. Elain loved this, he realised. She was always filled with excitement and fire whenever they were about to head somewhere new. There was adventure in her, and he supposed that after her life as a mortal where she had been stuck in one place and facing a life behind that Grayson bastard’s wall, there was freedom in her life now, and she absolutely cherished the chance to travel to new places and see new things. Lucien was beyond thankful that this was something he was able to do with her, that he was in a position to take her all over Prythian and get to explore these places with her. 

Elain bounded excitedly over to the door, standing beside Feyre who also appeared ready to leave, and Lucien smiled as he continued to watch his mate. He did hope, however, that when they arrived in the camp, she would be able to contain her excitement, at least on the outside. It probably wouldn’t look too great if Elain showed up to help with the troubles Cassian had gone to sort out, looking as if she were grinning from ear to ear. Nobody else would know that she was excited to see a new part of Prythian, and they may just think that she was excited by whatever issues they were trying to sort out.

“Are you all ready?” Azriel asked, doing up a buckle across his chest, and Lucien gave a single nod, adjusting his pack. 

“I think we’ve got everything.” He replied, and Elain nodded her agreement, linking her arm through her sister’s. Feyre gave a small smile to Rhys, and Lucien watched as they winked at one another, evidently having already said their goodbyes upstairs before coming down to join the rest of them. 

The Shadowsinger led them outside, and Lucien followed behind Elain, still able to feel her excitement as she just about bounded down the path. 

*

Gripping her mate’s hand, Elain tried to contain her excitement as they approached the main street of the Illyrian camp which Azriel had brought them to. She thought that she recognised a few of the shops from her dream of Nesta, and she began looking for the clothing store which belonged to the young Illyrian female. Emerie, had been her name in the vision, and Elain hoped to find that this was true in reality. That would mean that she probably was supposed to come here, and it hadn’t been some fanciful dream about her sister getting to have an adventure she did not. Smiling at that thought, Elain wondered when she had become so adventurous to begin with. 

When Lucien drew her carefully along with them, glancing down at her, she smiled again. It had probably had a lot to do with her mate, and her growing confidence in who she was now and who she was meant to be. As she grew even further, Elain knew that she would need to develop a sense for this sort of thing if she was meant to stand beside Lucien when he took the throne of the Day Court.

“Where is it that we are going?” Feyre asked, and Azriel turned his head to meet his High Lady’s eyes. 

“Cass will have taken Nesta to his cabin a little up this way…” the Illyrian pointed up a nearby road. “I have one nearby… as does Rhys…”

“That will do nicely.” Feyre said, before turning to face her sister. “You’ll stay in Rhys’ cabin with me…”

“Alright.” Elain nodded, trying to get the bounce out of her step. “Will we find Nesta and Cassian then?”

“Yes, after we get ourselves set up.” Feyre said, “It shouldn’t take too long…”

Elain followed her sister, Lucien still gripping her hand as they walked. She returned her gaze to the streets, now noticing the faces at the windows peering out at them, and even from this distance she could see the worries expressions on those faces. She wondered what they might be thinking to see a handful of High Fae suddenly walking their streets, but she hoped that Azriel would be recognised and that they would realise that the group were not a threat to them. Surely they must be panicked if they were facing frequent and brutal raids. 

Trying to look as friendly as possible, Elain continued to follow Feyre. Nobody came out to greet them, and she glanced uncertainly at Lucien as they headed for a row of little cabins just out of town. 

“It will be fine.” He told her, “As soon as Cassian and Azriel speak with them, I’m sure they’ll realise we aren’t here to do them further injury.”

“I hope you’re right.” Elain murmured, glancing back in the direction of the main street.


	251. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-One

**Chapter 251**

Elain took a seat at the table Azriel had selected for them close to the window, and looked around the little pub. She supposed that this was the place that many of those who lived in this camp would come for their evening meals or to socialise with others. The vibe was friendly enough, she figured, and she wouldn’t have been surprised to see families with younglings here. Most of the room was filled with tables and chairs for groups to sit at and eat, and there was a brightly lit bar across the far wall with an open door leading to what she supposed was the kitchen. 

“Would you like a drink, Petal?” Lucien asked, and Elain nodded her head, looking up at her mate who still stood beside her, not having taken his seat yet. He smiled and headed for the bar, and she knew that she would be pleased with whatever he brought back for her. After a moment, when Feyre sat down opposite her, Elain returned her gaze to the rest of the room. Everything here was made of wood, and seemed to be solidly built. She had expected nothing less from these people. The building and furniture seemed as hardy as they were.  
There were two other groups, aside from their own, in the pub. One appeared to be a group of young females, and the other was an older Illyrian male and, beside him, a female Elain assumed to be his wife. Both groups were eyeing them and murmuring softly amongst themselves. Elain tried to keep her expression calm and friendly as she turned her eyes on her younger sister. 

“What do we do?” she asked, her voice low so that they wouldn’t be overheard. “I don’t think they’re comfortable with us here…”

“Just act naturally.” Feyre replied, “Let Cassian and Azriel handle it…”

“What are they going to do?” Elain looked across the room to where Azriel was standing with Lucien at the bar. Feyre made a low chuckling noise and Elain narrowed her eyes, feeling as if her sister knew something she did not. Which, she figured, Feyre probably did.

“Whatever they have to.”

“That sounds like it could be dramatic…” Elain said, knowing full well that Cassian could be very dramatic if he saw the need for it.

“It could be. But, let’s hope it doesn’t come to that…” Feyre smiled more widely, looking past Elain who then turned around to see what her sister had spotted. Cassian and Nesta had arrived and were coming through the door. She saw Nesta smile at the sight of them before heading their way while Cassian went to the bar, clapping Azriel on the shoulder by way of greeting. 

“I thought that only Azriel would be coming…” Nesta said, sitting down beside Feyre. 

“Oh, you know us.” Feyre replied, “Adventure all the time…” Nesta’s eyes went to Elain then and the eldest sister gave a strange wry smile. 

“That does seem to be the way of it lately.”

Elain watched her sisters both looking at her, and knew that they were wondering about the ways in which she had changed over the last few months. It had been happening for longer than that though, Elain knew. She would have said that it had been happening since she and Nesta had been dragged from their beds that night they had been thrown into the Cauldron. Obviously, she had been changed physically, and that had been the night she had met Lucien and the bond had snapped into place. That had been the catalyst for it all. 

“It does, doesn’t it…” Feyre said softly, and Nesta nodded. 

“I should have guessed you’d come…” Nesta directed this comment at Elain who gave her a sweet smile, “You haven’t seen this part of Prythian yet…”

“Thus the basis of its appeal…” Elain replied, smoothing her skirt over her knees innocently. “Also, I had a dream about you and we thought maybe it meant I was meant to come and help…”

“What did you see?”

“You and Cassian talking to that female in the clothing store…” Elain watched Nesta think for a moment. Her sister seemed to be mulling something over before she responded. 

“Then you’d know that we’re going to have to work with the other females of the town. They seem to be just rolling over and letting those bastards come and take whatever they want in their raids…”

“Yeah, that was pretty much what I gathered.” Elain confirmed, smiling at Lucien as he returned and set a tall glass of a delicious looking orange liquid before her. Her mate then sank in to the chair beside her with a grin and a wink. 

“Hello, Nesta.”

“Lucien.”

“Have you been having a nice time with Cassian?”

“Uh…” Elain tried to choke back a gasp at Lucien’s question, but she couldn’t help watching her sister for her reaction. She was unsurprised when Nesta did nothing but sniff dismissively and look at Lucien down her nose. A few months ago Elain would have thought there was venom in her sister’s expression, but that wasn’t what she saw now. She saw amusement and what Elain might have even called affection. 

“Why yes, Lucien.” Nesta replied, her voice sweet, “I have.”

“Good to hear.” Lucien said, picking up his glass and taking a sip of his drink, “But, that’s probably all I need to hear, to be honest.” Nesta actually laughed at that and Elain looked at Feyre with disbelief. Her younger sister was watching the interaction between Nesta and Lucien with somewhat narrowed eyes, as if almost unable to believe it herself. The entire exchange came to a halt when Cassian and Azriel returned to their table and sat down.


	252. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Two

**Chapter 252**

Looking around the pub, Elain took in the different way that their group was being watched now that Azriel and Cassian were sitting with them. There were curious looks, and wary looks, and she couldn’t help but wonder what these folk thought they were doing here.

“Tomorrow morning,” Cassian said, his tone low so that only those at their table would hear what was going on, “There will be a meeting in the training square. Everyone currently still in the camp will be there, and we are gonna have a little chat with them all.”

“Is it mostly the females?” Azriel asked, and Cassian nodded.

“The rest have gone off with Devlon. It’s their absence that these other bastards are trying to take advantage of.”

“Right.”

“Perhaps…” Lucien put in, and Elain could hear the hesitance in his voice, knowing that he felt out of place here. “the High Lord should put his foot down?”

Both Azriel and Cassian shook their heads. “It’s probably why Rhys didn’t come.” Cassian said, and Azriel made a sound of agreement. “The Illyrians…” Cassian sighed a bit, “It’s not like Courts you are used to. Our camps may be in the Night Court territory, but we don’t bow and scrape… Rhys may technically have authority here if he showed up and threw a tantrum about playing nice with one another, but…” he shook his head, “It would be resented… and wouldn’t really fix the behaviours that cause the problem.”

“What do you mean cause the problem?” Feyre’s voice was icy, “As if these females are inviting what is being done to them…”

“Perhaps that was the wrong choice of words…” Cassian said, lifting a hand in surrender, “Those coming down here have to know that they can’t just walk in and take what they like… That’s a lesson they need to learn, as much as those here need to learn to throw a punch when it’s needed.”

“And that’s what you’ll be saying at your meeting tomorrow?” Nesta asked, “They need to step up?”

“Why not?” Cassian shrugged, and Azriel made a face. 

“Perhaps not in those words.” The Shadowsinger said, “But we can offer to help.”

“We can organise what they need…” Cassian added, “Training… in groups. We can rotate through the camp between Az and myself. We could get through them all in a day or two…”

“And teach them what?” Lucien asked, curiosity in his voice now.

“How to lay someone out on their arse.” Cassian replied simply, and Lucien grinned as he nodded his head.

Elain cast another glance around the room, wondering if anyone had caught any of this conversation. She didn’t suppose they had as they were all going about their business as if they weren’t even there. 

“If you need any help with that, let me know.” Lucien was still grinning and Elain turned her eyes on him. “Sounds like fun, to be honest.”

Nesta and Feyre seemed to be in deep thought, and Elain just knew that the both of them were trying to work out how they would best be useful. Suddenly, she felt rather useless. She couldn’t fight like they could, she hadn’t done the training the both of them had. There was no way that she would be able to teach anyone how to defend themselves. Why, she wondered, had she been shown that vision? She had thought she was meant to come here, but she had nothing to contribute. Had it been purely so that she could bring Azriel, Lucien and Feyre to help? That was a sad thought. 

Lucien’s hand suddenly slid into hers beneath the table and, when she looked around at him, she could see the light frown of concern on his face. Reaching for the bond, Elain realised that he was already reading her and that he must have felt her helplessness. Knowing that he knew she felt useless sent a wave of anguish through her, and Lucien’s frown deepened. He squeezed her hand in concern. “Petal…?”

Trying to give him a reassuring smile, Elain smoothed her free hand over her dress, trying to get any wrinkles out. She then traced a finger up and down her glass, playing with the condensation. “Is… there anything I can do to help?” She asked, after a moment, looking across the table at Cassian. 

“Ah…” she watched the thoughts flicker quickly through his mind, evident behind his eyes as he tried to go over everything in his head. 

“I… suppose it would be best to wait,” Azriel put in, “Until we have more of a solid plan of what we will be doing. It would be easier to see then where your help would be most beneficial.”

Elain knew that meant that they had no idea what she would be good for, and she lowered her gaze to her glass once more.

“Elain has excellent organisational skills.” Lucien put in, and Elain glanced his way. “If you’re thinking about rotating groups of these folk through some sort of training course, then you could benefit from having her run it.” He said, “She could keep track of which group needed to be where when and when they needed to move on to the next part… That kind of thing.”

Blinking, Elain looked at her mate. He was right, she could do that and keep everyone organised and on track. Smiling, she squeezed his hand and her heart warmed at the look in his eyes when he met her gaze. 

“That would be fantastic.” Cassian replied, “That would actually be great.”

“We will need to work it all out beforehand.” Azriel added, “And then you can have a kind of runsheet…”

“Sounds good to me.” Elain smiled, looking at them all. This was something she could do and be useful, and she would do it to the best of her ability.


	253. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Three

**Chapter 253**

Standing by the wall, Elain watched the Illyrians arriving at the training square. There was murmuring among them, and she tried to read the mood among the group. It seemed to Elain that many of them were curious, and more than a few of the females looked wary, as if suspecting something was going happen that they were not going to enjoy. Elain did not blame them for that, considering the raids they were frequently enduring. 

The females grouped together, arms reaching for one another and clasping on, holding as they waited to see what they had been gathered for, and what Cassian wanted. Elain held her arms crossed across her chest while she watched, aware that many pairs of eyes were being directed her way. It was clear that the Illyrians weren’t entirely comfortable with several High Fae showing up in their midst, but Elain hoped that Cassian would be able to calm them and give them something to work toward. 

Azriel appeared then, stalking along the side of the square as he made his way toward Cassian. Elain was surprised by that as she had rather thought that the Shadowsinger would have preferred to hide in a dark corner, rather than be where the centre of attention was about to be. He stood beside Cassian however, and soon enough the muttering around the place began to quiet as all pairs of eyes shifted to both Illyrians. The mood shifted then, and Elain watched as everyone settled. She could easily see how ready they were to listen to these two, and the trust there was evident. The sway that Cassian and Azriel held here was actually impressive, and Elain found herself holding her breath as she watched the scene before them. 

“This may work.” Nesta said, coming to stand beside Elain. “Look at the way they’re listening…”

“I noticed.” Elain replied, “They’re already interested in what they have to say. That would have been half the battle.”

“Indeed.” Nesta leaned back against the wall, Elain beside her. It was obvious that Nesta’s gaze was firmly upon Cassian as he began speaking, addressing the audience, and Elain couldn’t help but watch her sister. She had never seen Nesta like this, so enthralled with someone. It was actually fascinating. 

When Lucien came to stand on Elain’s other side, she gave her mate a smile, before returning her attention to what Cassian was saying. He had gone over the camp’s need for everyone to defend themselves in order to deter those coming down in the raids, and now he was outlining how they were going to go about getting everyone ready for just that. Azriel seemed to be taking notes beside Cassian, jotting down everything that his friend was saying, and Elain smiled to herself. No doubt all of the talking between the two had resulted in Azriel getting no definite plan from Cassian who would have clearly insisted that his general plan would work out. It would have been necessary now, however, to note exactly what he was saying to those who had come to hear him in order to keep things from getting confusing. 

It seemed to be as Elain had recalled from initial discussions. Cassian had told everyone that they would be broken into small groups of no more than ten and then over the next few days, rotate through several training sessions with himself, Azriel, Lucien, as well as some time with Nesta and Feyre. There had been some murmuring at that last part, but nobody had outright objected, and so Cassian had continued talking. Elain had returned to looking around the square, trying to memorise some of the faces in order to better be able to manage her job in keeping everyone where they should be, when a low murmuring at the back began once more. 

That murmuring began to spread, growing louder as movement began to spread as well. Elain stood straight, Nesta and Lucien doing the same beside her, as she scanned for whatever seemed to be the problem. It took several moments, but then the smell of smoke filled her nostrils and her mouth dropped open. “It’s smoke…” She murmured as those at the back of the square began running. 

Within seconds the panic and action had spread through the crowd and everyone was moving. Elain followed the others out to the street, coming to a stop when she could see several of the buildings at the other end of the little town emitting thick curling black smoke. Feyre shot past her then, and it took Elain a second before she ran after her sister. She knew that Feyre had some water magic, and that her sister would at least be able to do something constructive to assist with putting the flames out, but she had no further thought as to how to help until she noticed Cassian, Azriel and Lucien running past the burning buildings and into the surrounding landscape. It was then she wondered just how those fires had started, and she turned to Nesta to get her elder sister to assist her in keeping everyone else within the boundary of the town.


	254. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Four

**Chapter 254**

The smoke was thick and stung Elain’s eyes as she tried to get everyone to stay in the street. Several buildings were on fire, and a line had formed to pass buckets of water from the well to the fires in an attempt to put them out. Out of the corner of her stinging eyes, Elain could see Feyre standing before the flames of the largest fire, trying to wield her magic in battling the heat and flames. Elain could see that her sister was making a difference, and she returned her attention to what she and Nesta were trying to do. 

Having seen Lucien, Cassian and Azriel disappear out past the edge of town, she was convinced that it would be best to keep everyone away from the potential dangers. The Illyrian females at first did not take kindly to Elain and Nesta trying to tell them what to do, but after several minutes of reasoning, and the fire spreading to another two buildings, things in the street became desperate and chaotic enough that they were all too busy to argue. Just about everyone was now actively trying to help put the flames out, but the smoke only thickened. Elain choked as the wind whipped it past her, forcing it into her mouth and up her nose. Nesta’s arm came around her, and they both turned out of the wind, Elain’s eyes squinting to see as far through the smoke as she could in the direction her mate had run. 

If whoever had lit these fires was out there, then they were a potential threat, and the thought that Lucien had gone running straight toward them unsettled Elain. She knew that Lucien was a skilled fighter, and he had weapons on him, he always did, not least that lovely sword he was so fond of. However, she didn’t know how well he would do against a possible horde of Illyrian warriors. It would be a mistake to trust that he would come out of that scuffle intact. Elain bit her lip at the thought, rubbing at her stinging eyes with one hand as she tried to resist a noise of distress. 

Opening herself to the bond, Elain tried to search for Lucien. She could still hear his heartbeat, which she knew was a good sign, as so far it wasn’t altogether too quick or out of the ordinary. Down the bond she could sense a little anxiety, and some determination. This suggested to her that they hadn’t found whatever they had been looking for, and that relieved Elain a little as she figured they would be returning any moment, and she could stop worrying. 

Returning her focus to the fires, Elain and Nesta moved to help join the lines, hauling buckets of water back and forth. The acrid smoke was everywhere, thick and oily, but after a while their efforts began to pay off and the flames receded. Elain wiped the back of her dirty hand across for forehead, her eyes going back to the end of the street. Her heartrate increased when she saw several silhouettes moving through the smoke, wings casting shadows, even in the dim light. She had thought, at first, that it was her friends returning and she went to move toward them, eager to find her mate. An instant later, however, she realised that those wings did not belong to either Cassian or Azriel, and her breath caught in her throat. She’d frozen, halfway through turning to head their way, and one of her hands reached out to grab Nesta by the elbow. Her sister’s posture went rigid when she had turned to look at what Elain was focused on, and one of Nesta’s free hands reached out in front of Elain, preventing her from moving any closer to the shapes coming out of the smoke.

“Elain, get back…”

Elain just watched as the Illyrians drew closer until she could make out at least five of them at the edge of the street, looking into the town and watching everyone putting out the last of the fires. She could feel her pulse quicken, her heart beginning to thunder in her chest, and she knew that it was panic rising in her. They had done nothing to teach those here how to defend themselves yet, and she knew that if those Illyrians decided to walk through the camp and take whatever they wanted, that it was unlikely they would be able to stop them, especially with Cassian, Azriel, and Lucien out in the hillside. 

Panic moved through Elain, hot and blistering, as she tried to work out what to do. She felt a questioning tug down the bond, and then Lucien appeared a few feet away having winnowed into the street. He looked at her, and she could see his metallic eye trying to focus on her face as he strode toward her, concern evident on the rest of his face. He stopped mid stride however, clearly having read something on her own face, and then he twisted around to see what she was looking at. When he saw the Illyrians, Lucien’s back went straight and he spun around, his stance widening into a ready pose, sword now in hand, as he put himself squarely between Elain and Nesta, and the threat at the end of the street. Elain went to take a step toward him, but Nesta pulled her back, grip iron around Elain’s wrist.

“Lucien, don’t…” Elain said, loud enough that she knew her mate could hear her. He didn’t move, however, although she knew that he wouldn’t. He wasn’t about to go charging off to fight, but he would fight if the threat came any closer, endangering them. Elain couldn’t breath as she stood there, just watching. She dreaded the moment those Illyrians would come closer, because she knew that her mate would come off second best if he had to defend against the five of them, and that was even if she could see all that there were. Elain swallowed thickly at the thought that there were likely more of them out there, hiding and just waiting to come down and join their friends when the time was right. “Lucien…” she breathed, wanting to move toward him again, but Nesta still held her wrist tightly. 

Behind them, others had begun to notice what was happening and, as the last of the flames were extinguished, some of the Illyrian females began to gather. Elain could hear the murmuring behind herself and Nesta and she glanced over her shoulder to see groups forming as they watched the end of the street. The fear and anxiety coming off of them was almost palpable, and Elain knew that Cassian had been right. They all needed some serious work in order to squash that fear and build confidence. 

Lucien’s heartbeat quickening in Elain’s head made her spin back around to look at him, and she could see him readying himself an instant before Cassian and Azriel descended out of the smoky sky, landing between Lucien and the Illyrians coming their way.

“Are you boys lost?” Cassian’s falsely bright voice carried easily to them up the street, and the murmuring behind Elain stopped as everyone tried to listen to what was being said.

“We… saw the smoke.” The closest Illyrian said, and the lie was evident in his voice. “Thought we might come to see what it was all about.”

“Well, you can see that it’s under control.” Cassian replied, “You can go about your day…”

The low, mocking laugh, that came back at them made the hairs on the back on Elain’s neck stand on end. “Maybe we’ll come back and check on how things are later…”

“You do,” Cassian warned, and all traces of false humour were gone from his voice now, “and you’ll be the ones who need checking on.”

“You plan on moving in?”

“Does that matter?” Cassian drawled, and the Illyrians who were becoming more and more clearly visible as the last of the smoke was whipped away by the wind, made a show of looking past the males facing them, their eyes roving over the groups of Illyrian females standing in the street. 

“We will probably find the place more hospitable when you’re on your way home…”

“Unlikely.” Cassian’s voice was nearly a growl now, and Elain saw Azriel eyeing his friend, and adjusting his stance a little, as if expecting Cassian to suddenly attack. “I’m telling you that you’ll never find this place or those in it hospitable ever again, and if you come back here, I’ll see you put into the dirt.”

“Oh, all of us?” There was mocking humour in the retort, but Cassian gave a cold laugh. 

“All of you.”

There was a murmur of annoyance from the males at the end of the street, and Elain watched them adjusting their wings uncomfortably as they looked at one another before they all suddenly leaped skyward. Within seconds they were gone, and the tension in the street eased a little. Nesta released Elain, and Elain hurried toward Lucien, reaching him as he sheathed his sword, and she pressed herself into his side, relief flowing through her as he wrapped his now free arm around her waist, holding her to himself.

“I’m glad you didn’t attack them.” She murmured, shuddering a little when she felt his lips brush against her forehead lightly. 

“I have no desire to die, Petal.” He said, and she could hear the smirk in his voice, his attempt at humour to deflect from how serious the situation could have gotten. Looking up at him, Elain tightened her hand around her grip on his shirt. 

“That’s good to know, love.”

He smiled at her, nodding. “Come on,” he said, turning her and moving toward Cassian, Azriel, Nesta, and Feyre who stood nearby. 

“Will they come back?” Nesta asked, and both Cassian and Azriel nodded. 

“They will.” Azriel said, “We need to move forward with our plans…”

“We’re ready.” Feyre said, “Let’s get it happening.”


	255. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Five

**Chapter 255**

After dinner that evening, Elain leaned back against the cushions on one of the couches in Rhys’ house she was sharing with Lucien and Feyre. Azriel, Nesta, and Cassian were still there, and they were all gathered around a low table in the living area, in front of the warm fire. Lucien’s hand was slowly caressing Elain’s thigh as she listened to the conversations going back and forth across the room, and she struggled to keep her eyes open. It had been a long day, and she was very much looking forward to getting up to bed when they were done here.

“Are you alright, Petal?”

Elain nodded, leaning into Lucien’s side, resting her head against his shoulder. His hand continued to caress her, and she released a soft sigh of a breath, watching as Azriel leaned forward over the table. They had gathered a list of all the names of those who would participate in the training they were going to provide, and now the Shadowsinger and Cassian were working on breaking those names up into groups in order to move through the training over the next few days. 

“Do you want to keep family groupings together?” Azriel glanced up across the table at Cassian who tilted his head, considering for a moment. Elain just watched them. She could see both the benefits and drawbacks of that situation. Some would likely feel more confident and supported working with members of their family, while others may be distracted and do better in a situation they could better focus on what they were being taught. This was about moving out of their comfort zones, after all. Cassian had evidently had the same thought, because he shook his head, and Azriel’s gaze returned to the list before him. 

“How big will the groups be?” Feyre asked, swirling her wine around in her glass. 

“Around seven.” Azriel replied, looking over his groupings. “More or less…”

“That’s a good size.” Cassian said, and Elain didn’t think she had seen such a thoughtful look on his face before. She could tell that he was going over his plans for the morning, how he would run his session and what he would need to do. “It’s small enough for individual instruction, but large enough to cover nerves of anyone without confidence and large enough to actually get us through everyone…” He fell silent, his eyes still distant, and Elain turned her gaze on her elder sister. Nesta was watching Cassian, her own eyes somewhat distant and her expression thoughtful as well.

“Do you really think you have time to teach them everything they will need?” Lucien asked, and Elain could hear the hesitation in his voice as if he were reluctant to express his doubts. “Proper training takes…” he paused for a second, “… longer.”

“Yes, it takes years ideally.” Azriel murmured. “Which we evidently do not have.”

“No…” Lucien said. 

“We don’t need to make them fully fledged warriors.” Cassian replied. “We just need to give them the confidence to push back. Teach them a few ways to put some of those bastards on their arses…” He looked from Lucien to Azriel and then back again, “Once those pricks see that they can’t just come down here and take what they want, once they see that everyone here will put up a fight, they’ll decide it isn’t worth it, and they won’t come back.” Lucien tilted his head, considering those words, and Cassian’s eyes settled on Elain’s mate. “That’s the hope.”

“And if it’s not the way this plays out?” Lucien asked. 

“Mm…” Cassian rolled his shoulders, settling himself more comfortably into his seat. “Then I’ll put them into the dirt.”

Elain looked from one to the next, her blood growing cold at the thought of that. Evidently not the only one put on edge by Cassian’s words, Elain watched Feyre down the rest of her wine before leaning forward. “… can you take them all?” Feyre asked, her hand reaching out and settling against Cassian’s wrist. “If it comes to that?”

Cassian looked around at them all, and then he nodded. “Depends how many of them there are, but with what we have in this room… We should be fine.”

“Rhys would come.” Feyre said, setting back in her chair once again. “If we needed him.”

“No doubt.” Cassian nodded and then took the lists that Azriel had handed him. “These look good…”

“We just need to work out a runsheet and schedule, then.” The shadowsinger replied, moving onto the next slip of paper. Elain watched him writing for a few moments, Nesta leaning forward over the table to have a look at what he was coming up with. “An hour or two for each session?”

“Two.” Cassian murmured, “It needs to be worth it…” he bit his lip, “Make it three…” He looked at Lucien then, “What do you think?”

“Three.” Lucien agreed, “If you’re going to teach them to use a weapon, It’ll take you an hour to demonstrate and them to grasp the idea, an hour for them to get it right, and then at least an hour of practice while you give them support and feedback…”

“Yeah…” Cassian nodded again, “At least three…”

Azriel continued to work on his schedule for another few minutes, and then he had passed it to Elain who lifted a hand and took it. “Does this make sense to you?” he asked, and she looked down at it. 

“Yes…” He had drawn a map of the town, indicating where each session was to be held, and with who. Then he had added times and group names so that she would know which group was meant to be at which station at certain times, and then where they should be directed to next. “It does. It’s very clear.” 

“Good…” He sighed, “That will be what we go with then.” Elain nodded and handed him back the sheet. 

“What time in the morning are they all gathering again to find out which groups they are in?”

“Sunrise.” Cassian replied, every one of his teeth on full display as he grinned. Elain groaned.

“We’d better get some sleep.” She said, and Lucien got to his feet first.

“You’re halfway there already, Petal.” He grinned, offering her his hand and then pulling her to her feet. Elain didn’t let go of his hand then, but smiled at him. Behind her, Cassian and Azriel also got to their feet. 

“We are all going to need rest.” Cassian said, “Sunrise in the training square…”

Elain gave a half-hearted wave to the others and then followed her mate up the stairs to their waiting bed and the soft mattress she had been daydreaming about since before dinner had even been served.


	256. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Six

**Chapter 256**

Her eyes scanning the sheet, Elain nodded in satisfaction. As far as she could tell, everyone had moved off into their correct groups and had found where they were meant to be. She had just spent the last little while listening to Feyre and Nesta talk to their first group, checking names off her list, and now Elain strode back up the street, her eyes sweeping the shops she passed. It had seemed as if every female still here had turned up for Cassian’s discussion that morning at sunrise. This, Elain figured, was a good sign. If they were all keen to learn and take control of their lives, then Cassian and the others would more easily be able to make a difference for them. If most of them were there and ready for that, they would be met with less resistance. 

Most. Elain squinted at a few of the shop windows. Most, not all. There were still some who stood behind counters or peered out from windows and houses up and down the street. There would always be those who resisted change, and clung to the way that things were as that was the way they had always been. Change was scary, Elain knew that. She thought of all the changes she had gone through in the last two years, and it was almost staggering. She couldn’t blame those who lived up here for being afraid of changes that outsiders brought, especially as they had to be under such stress already with what had been happening to them. She just hoped that those who wanted to do something about it would be enough.   
Wondering what she should do for three hours until the groups were due for a break before rotating to their next activity, Elain glanced again at her sheet, before looking up and heading for the training square. She was curious to see the kinds of training that Cassian, Azriel, and Lucien would be giving to the groups they had. 

As she passed the buildings which had burned the day before, Elain’s gaze slid up the mountain into the landscape surrounding them. It was rocky and harsh, with the grasses and bushes spindly and sparse. Despite this, there were plenty of places to hide while watching the town beneath oneself, and Elain couldn’t help but wonder if there were eyes on them now. Those Illyrians could have easily returned and have been sitting up there as her eyes swept the rough land, and she wouldn’t have seen them. The thought made Elain shiver. If they had so easily been able to get in and out of the place yesterday, lighting that blaze, then this place really wasn’t safe. 

Quickening her step, Elain headed for the training square. She would feel safer being closer to Lucien. At least that way, if something happened, they would be together, and she wouldn’t be worried about him. They could defend one another, and whatever happened to one of them would likely happen to the other. She could face whatever it was or would be, as long as they were together. 

Elain could hear metal on metal before she even got into the training square. She did not expect to find Lucien and Azriel going at one another with swords, and she stopped mid stride, her eyes widening. Staring, shock coursing through her, Elain felt her mouth open although no sound escaped her. Their fighting styles were strikingly different, that was apparent to Elain, even though she was aware that she knew nothing about fighting or swordplay, or anything of the sort. There was variation in the give and take, the back and forth between the two males, and Elain found herself unable to breathe as she watched.

It took Elain quite a while before she even noticed Cassian on the edge of it all, his voice low as he spoke to his small group of females, pointing out this or that that Lucien or Azriel had done, or giving critique here and there. Managing to shake herself, Elain moved around the edge, until she stood somewhat behind the group of females, but still with an excellent view of what her mate was doing. 

He was a magnificent creature. Smiling as she allowed her eyes to move over Lucien appreciatively, Elain felt pride swell within her. Her mate was utterly astounding and she suspected that, even if he hadn’t been her mate, she would have found it impossible to drag her eyes away from him. He moved in the morning sunlight with such lithe grace and ease, his movements almost catlike as he danced back and forth, sword glinting as it met with Azriel’s over and over while that red hair shone like molten metal. If Lucien reflected the sunlight, heat and brightness radiating off of him, then Azriel absorbed it. The morning light seemed to hit the Shadowsinger and go nowhere, somehow almost disappearing into him. It was such a stark contrast that Elain took a moment to try and understand what she was seeing, but then Lucien let out a soft laugh, evidently amused by something that had happened in their back and forth, and Elain’s eyes went back to her magnificent mate. Nothing she had ever seen was as radiant as Lucien, and Elain doubted that she would ever see anything as utterly beautiful as he was again. 

When Cassian called for them to stop, both Lucien and Azriel did so immediately and without hesitation. They stood side by side, panting and smiling, and Elain knew that they had enjoyed themselves immensely. She looked again at Lucien, allowing her eyes to move over him appreciatively, from his powerful legs and thighs, up over his stomach and chest, past those broad shoulders that she so dearly loved to cling to. When she reached his face, she found his eyes, both russet and golden, already on her, and he was smiling widely as he watched her. Elain knew that he was all too aware of the fact that she had been ogling him, and she felt herself blush. If anyone else had looked at her, she knew that it would have been apparent to them as well. With a shrug, she pushed that thought aside. So what if someone had noticed her looking at her mate? He was her mate, and he was hers to look at. He was extremely attractive, and she knew that she would be looking at him like that for the rest of her life. Others would look at him too, she knew that, and with a flare of jealousy moving through her, Elain eyed the women sitting nearby, trying to tell if any of them had their eyes on her mate. They were all looking at Cassian, however, and she knew that they were all very eager to learn whatever it was that he was about to try and teach them.


	257. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Seven

**Chapter 257**

Elain spent the next few hours watching the training taking place. Cassian had instructed the group to move around between himself, Azriel, and Lucien. Each of them were teaching a different skill, and she thought that they all seemed to pick these things up fairly quickly. At least to her unskilled eyes. She had been correct in that they seemed very eager to learn, and they took the constructive criticism and suggestions for improvement well, doing their best to remedy whatever had been incorrect. Elain was rather impressed as they approached the end of the third hour of the session, and she found somewhere comfortable to sit to watch the final minutes. 

Cassian had been talking to each one of them after they had demonstrated what they had learned, and he was now telling them that they were to move into the town to where Feyre and Nesta were after they had taken a break for the midday meal. He had pointed her out, letting them know that Elain had all the information they needed if they didn’t know where they were meant to be, and to ask her any questions they had and, once he had dismissed them, everyone had filed out of the square, leaving her alone with the two Illyrians and her mate.   
Lucien strolled toward Elain, a smirk on his face, and she looked up at him when he came to stand over her. “Did you enjoy the session, Petal?” he asked, the sun shining behind him and casting a bright aura around him as she gazed upward. 

“I did.” She told him. “You looked magnificent. I found it hard to look away…”

“I could feel you…” he told her, bending to lower himself to the ground beside her. “I could feel you watching me… and I could feel that you liked what you saw.” He flashed her a grin, and Elain felt her skin heat up just a little. 

“I rather thought you might be able to…” She knew that she was blushing and, when she glanced at his face, she knew that he had noticed because his grin was even wider than it had been before. 

“I liked knowing that you liked it…”

“I know…” she smiled then. She had been able to feel his appreciation of her appraisal of him, and it was one of her favourite things about the bond. “Do you think that it will make a difference?” she asked, “What they learned?”

“Let’s hope so.” He replied, “It can’t have hurt… they have skills now that they didn’t have yesterday. So, if those pricks come back… they will at least be able to resist them…”

“Surely none of them could take on any of those males we saw yesterday…”

“Not one or two of them.” Lucien agreed, “But all of them?” he gave a shrug. “I’ve seen stranger things happen…”

“Hmm…” Elain leaned her head back against the wall, thinking as she enjoyed the warm sun on her face. 

“Really,” Lucien said, “they only really need to be enough of a nuisance to make coming here not worth it… Put up enough of a fight and they won’t bother.”

“No…” Elain agreed, “But they’ll likely just go somewhere else…”

“There is that.” Lucien muttered. 

“Which…” Cassian said, walking toward them with Azriel, “is why we will probably have to sort the problem out a little more permanently.”

“How do you mean?” Lucien asked, and Elain could hear the uncertainty in his voice. “You mean to kill them?”

“Not if we can avoid it.” Cassian said, and Azriel nodded his agreement. “But… others need to be made aware that this type of thing won’t be tolerated. Rhys would agree… and I will check with him before making any decisions…” he glanced at Azriel then, and Elain knew that it would be the Shadowsinger sending the message. “But, if it comes to that, then yes.”

“Won’t that start a war?” Lucien asked, “What if the other camps have a problem with that…”

“They won’t all go up against Rhys.” Azriel put in. “And they know that we speak for the High Lord.”

Elain slid her hand into her mate’s. She was definitely not looking forward to any kind of battle like that. She had seen Illyrians at war. It had been bloody and gruesome, and she could still see Lucien in her memory covered in blood and gore when he had found her after the war. It was not something she wished to see again. As if sensing her thoughts, or maybe she had inadvertently sent the image to him down the bond, Lucien squeezed Elain’s hand. “It won’t be like that, Petal.” He told her, but Elain wasn’t so sure about that. War was always bloody and gruesome. 

“Let us hope,” Cassian said, stretching a little, as if to ease his muscles after the session that had just finished, “that this will be enough of a deterrent to make that unnecessary.”


	258. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Eight

**Chapter 258**

__

_The smoke stung Elain’s eyes and she squinted toward the town. Another fire? The breath ripped from her lungs when she saw it coiling black and almost oily up into the clear mountain air. The fire must have been even bigger than the one the other day had been. Half the town had to be on fire, and Elain dreaded to think how it had happened. Everything had been fine about an hour ago when she had told her sisters that she was taking a walk up into the mountainside to see if she could find any new flowers that she had not yet encountered._

_As the wind picked up, blowing more of the smoke her way, the faint screams reached Elain’s ears and her heart began pounding painfully in her chest. She froze an instant later, reaching for Lucien down the bond. She could hear his heart in her head, beating even more quickly than her own was, and an instant later she felt what came close to panic from him. She felt him reaching for her, and she pushed what she was seeing down the bond to him, wanting him to know where she was. Why hadn’t she told him what she was doing? She had figured that Feyre and Nesta would let him know, but what if they hadn’t? She knew the moment that Lucien had received what she had pushed his way because his panic lessened, and in its place came a sort of steely determination._

_When the screams reached Elain again, she surged forward, heading back down the mountain. It would take her at least fifteen minutes to get back down there. She had climbed a good distance in her wandering and she really wished that she could winnow. “I’m coming!” she tried to send the thought to her mate, not wanting him to be worrying about her with whatever was going on down there._

_The single thought of “No!” reached her then, but it only set Elain moving from a brisk walk to a run. She careened down the slope, jumping over rocks and small bushes here and there, her dress snagging on branches as she tore past. Elain didn’t stop, still trying to maintain her connection to Lucien through the bond. His heart was still pounding quickly in her head, but she wasn’t getting anything else from him and that scared her._

_When she hit the town, Elain was trying her best not to choke on the thick smoke coiling through the street. She gagged at the sight that befell her then. Several young Illyrian females lay in the dirt by the first of the shops she came to and, upon closer inspection, she saw that they had all very nearly been sliced in half. Blood and gore was splattered around them, innards in the dirt and Elain pressed a hand to her mouth, fear spiking through her as her eyes swept the rest of the street. Nobody else was anywhere to be seen, and she took several more steps up the street, terror building in her. Running for the training square, Elain hiked her dress up past her knees, trying not to trip._

_“LUCIEN?” She screamed, her mate’s name ripping from her as she lost all control of her fear upon seeing the training square empty of anyone she knew. Several more Illyrian females lay by the far wall, and Elain couldn’t make herself move any closer to look at what had been done to them. “LU-” choking his name back, Elain realised that she should probably try to make less noise lest those who had done this hear her if they were still around. She hadn’t seen anyone leaving the town on her way in, so it stood to reason that they were probably all too close._

_Closing her eyes for a moment, Elain tried to focus on the bond. If Lucien wasn’t in here, where she had expected him to be, she would find him through that pull that was always present. She tilted her head, trying to follow that sense… and then headed for Rhys’ cabin._

_It didn’t take Elain long to get up the hill and she approached the cabin at close to her top speed. She stumbled a little when she reached the stairs and she had to step over a young female lying sprawled across the bottom two steps. Had this female run here looking for help? Evidently she hadn’t found it, and Elain eyed the front door warily. If Feyre and Lucien had been here, they never would have let something like that happen on the front steps._

_Knowing that she couldn’t just turn away without checking, Elain slipped inside and hurried from room to room. Apart from a mess in the kitchen, she found nothing out of the ordinary, and she ran back outside, jumping down the steps in one motion before she turned left and took off toward Cassian’s cabin. She could still hear Lucien’s heartbeat, and she knew now that she was heading in the right direction._

_When Cassian’s cabin came into view, Elain hurried to hide behind a tree, peering around at what was happening in the small garden out the front. There were a handful of Illyrian warriors that Elain recognised from the previous day and they had a small group kneeling in the dirt before them. Her eyes sweeping the group, Elain’s breath caught when she saw Azriel kneeling among a few of the females Elain recognised from the training session the day before. Before she could even try to come up with an idea of what she should do, several of the warriors had moved forward and taken heads from shoulders in a matter of seconds. Elain squeezed her eyes shut, clamping a hand over her own mouth as she spun away, sure that she would never forget the image of Azriel falling limply into the dirt. Panic ripped through her, and she felt a tug from Lucien. He was alive, and he was nearby. She had to find him._

_It was Feyre Elain found first, having snuck through the trees and around the side of the cabin. Her younger sister was slumped against a tree, a hand pressed to her abdomen as blood soaked her shirt._

_“Feyre?” Elain asked, sinking down to kneel in front of her younger sister. “What happened?”_

_“They appeared out of nowhere..” Feyre breathed, her eyes looking almost vacant. “They were here before we knew what was happening… they walked through the town slaughtering everyone. It didn’t matter who…”_

_“Azriel is…” Elain shook her head, “Where’s Lucien?” she asked, “Where are Nesta and Cassian?”_

_Feyre frowned a little, before making a vague gesture toward the back of the cabin. “They tried to sneak some of those who made it here… They tried to get them out…”_

_“Is Rhys coming?” Elain asked, thinking that the High Lord of the Night Court might be the only one who could put a stop to this. “You’ve asked him to come, haven’t you?”_

_“No…” Feyre shook her head, her movement almost clumsy. She pressed both hands to her abdomen then. “I can’t reach him… they hit me with faebane…” she made a choked sound, blood dribbling from the corner of her lips. “The bond is dark…”_

_“Okay…” Elain tried to squash her panic, tried to remain calm and keep her voice steady. “You need to get up. We have to move before they come around here and find you…”_

_“I can’t.” Feyre breathed, “That’s why I’m here. I can’t move…”_

_“You have to.”_

_“No.” Feyre’s voice was suddenly hard, commanding. “You go.” She said, “You go and save those you can. I will be here when you come back.”_

_“Feyre…”_

_“Get up, Elain. Do as I said…”_

_Elain got to her feet, her eyes on her sister’s pale face. No matter what Feyre had said, Elain knew that her sister would be dead by the time she returned. “I’ll come back…” she breathed, and Feyre gave her a weak smile. Without another word, Elain spun on her heel and took off around the back of the house, through the thick garden._

_“Lucien?” she breathed, spotting a hole in one of the low hedges across the back wall of the garden. She could tell that someone had gone through there not long ago, and she hurried across the garden, ducking beneath the leaves as she followed._

_Elain had about a second and a half of relief at having found her mate, warmth spreading through her as his eyes, russet and gold, met hers, and she smiled. Then, several Illyrian warriors appeared out of the leaves, and several more shrieks sounded as the group of four or five females that were huddled nearby realised that they were outnumbered and trapped. Cassian and Nesta moved instantly, back to back as they attempted to hold back the warriors who approached them, and Elain went to move toward Lucien, trying to get to him before a hard arm snaked around her waist and she was lifted from the ground. She gave a startled cry, and she heard a snarl from Lucien followed by a pained grunt._

_“No!” She cried, kicking at the male who held her. She was proud of the irritated sound he made, and then he had dumped her onto the soft earth and she gasped as the breath was knocked from her lungs. Forcing herself up a second later, Elain tried to see what had happened to Lucien. She had only a brief glimpse of him, face down on the ground, a huge Illyrian warrior standing over him, before the male standing over her had seized a handful of her hair, yanking her up to her knees._

_Nesta and Cassian were putting up a terrific fight nearby but, as Elain watched, one of the Illyrians fired a bolt from a vicious looking bow, and Cassian jerked backwards, shock on his face as blood splattered his shoulder, and began running down his chest. She heard Nesta’s scream of outrage and fear, before her sister’s voice was cut off as an Illyrian grabbed her by the throat and lifted her from the ground. Elaine’s’ heart stopped cold in her chest when there was a sickening snap and Nesta went limp, falling to the ground when she was dropped._

_“NO!” Elain shrieked, tearing at the hand holding her hair, and she tried to get away, to get to her sister. “Nes! Nes!” she couldn’t get anywhere and tears blurred her vision. From the corner of her eye, Elain could see Lucien responding to her screams, trying his best to get off of the ground where he was being held. She redoubled her efforts, trying with everything in her to break free, to do something, anything, as the Illyrian standing over Lucien pulled a large sword from the scabbard at his hip and then lifted it high. “NO!” Elain screamed, just about dragging the male holding her by the hair across the grass as she tried to get to Lucien, “NO! Please! No!_

_Russet and gold eyes met Elain’s then, and Elain felt Lucien so very clearly down the bond. He was terrified, and his fear ripped through her, filling her entirely. “Elain…” he breathed, and Elain reached for him, her hands outstretched as she strained to get closer, even as she wrapped herself even more tightly in the thread between them. It had taken only a second, even though it had seemed like an eternity, but Elain had barely even drawn a breath before the Illyrian had brought his sword down, driving it through Lucien’s ribs and into the earth beneath him. Elain felt the blow as if she had been the one who had been struck, but she held Lucien’s eyes, unable to look away as her mate released a slow breath and went still. Elain hadn’t even realised that she was screaming.  
_


	259. Chapter Two Hundred and Fifty-Nine

**Chapter 259**

She couldn’t break free. Elain twisted and thrashed, but the hold on her only increased, as did her absolute panic. She needed to get free, that was the only thing that registered in her mind as she fought with everything in her. That was all she had, all that was left, until she heard her name.

“Elain!” 

Pausing for a moment, Elain listened. Her heart was thundering loudly in her chest but then… she drew a slow breath, another heartbeat. Opening her eyes, Elain turned. Red hair was the first thing she saw, and she threw herself at it. “Lucien…”

“Yes, Petal.” He murmured, arms sliding more carefully around her, and Elain allowed him to pull her in closer. The hold on her no longer felt restrictive and scary, but warm and comforting, and she leaned into it as best she could. “It’s okay…” his soft voice was murmured against her hair, and Elain wrapped her own arms around her mate, pressing her cheek into his warm chest. “It’s okay…” he repeated, his hand now stroking her hair slowly. “It was just a dream…”

“It…” Elain realised that she was crying then. She couldn’t stop the tears, even as her entire body shook with the sobs, and she struggled to breathe. Tightening her grip on Lucien, she tried to force herself to finish, “It was … horrible…”

“I know.” He murmured, and Elain snuggled more firmly into his chest. She could feel that he did know, because she could feel a tension within him that wasn’t usually there. With a jolt, she looked up at him, her eyes finding his face even in the very early morning light. 

“You know?” she asked, watching his expression carefully. “Do you mean that you saw it?”

“I believe I did, Petal.” He said, fingers combing through her hair. “I think you may have sent it to me down the bond while we slept…”

“I’m sorry…” she sniffed, wishing that that wasn’t something that happened without her knowledge or control. “I’m sorry…”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, my love.” He said, lips brushing her forehead gently. “Besides, I’ve sent you many more horrible things in the past…”

“Nothing as bad as that…” she murmured, and she felt him tilt his head in consideration. Thinking about it, she wondered if he agreed with her. He had sent her Jesminda’s execution, visions of him being tortured by Amarantha beneath the mountain, she had even seen what had happened in the cave with Ianthe. “I… I think this was worse.” And it was, for her, Elain figured. She had seen her sisters and her mate murdered in this dream.

“It was a dream, love…”

“I know.” Elain held on to Lucien, but then noticed that his hand had stopped rubbing circles on her back and was sitting still against her spine. 

“… It was just a dream, wasn’t it?” he asked, and she pulled back enough to look up at his face once again. 

“Do you think it was more than that?” she asked, and his eyes met hers in the early morning light.

“Do you?” he asked, metallic eye clicking and whirring as he thought. 

“I…” Elain considered it. As of yet, she had no way for certain to know if the things she saw were true visions let alone if they were present or future events. She was usually fairly good at discerning if something was the past, but this was different. It was even harder to work out what she had been shown when it came to her in a dream. “I can’t know for sure…”

“It’s your ability, Petal.” Lucien told her gently, “What does your instinct say?”

Elain thought of the dream, the way that she had evidently walked off from town in the morning, and yet in the dream she had had knowledge of the day before, and the training, which suggested that the dream events would take place today. Glancing at the window, and the grey light outside, she bit her lip. “It would be today.” She told Lucien and she felt him shudder. 

“Anything that would suggest that those events will come to pass?”

“I’m not sure.” She admitted. “It kind of began while I was already up the mountain.” She looked out the window again. “It looks to be a beautiful day… so… I probably would consider a walk up there this morning…” She pulled back from Lucien to look at his face again. “What should we do?”

“We should tell Cassian.” Lucien said. “If nothing comes to pass, then there’s no harm in having been prepared for something. But, if we say nothing and it turns out something happens…”

“I agree.” Elain nodded her head, fear clawing its way back into her chest. Everyone she cared for had died in that dream. If it had been a vision of what today would hold… “We should leave.” She said, her hands coming up to Lucien’s face as she held him so that he could do nothing but look back into her eyes. “We should go back to the Night Court, and then go on to Day.”

“You’re scared, Petal.” He murmured, and Elain nodded as tears welled in her eyes. “You died…” she choked, “I watched you die… And I can’t do that…”

“You won’t have to.” He said, “That is why you’re shown things like this. So that you can say something and we can change it… Simply knowing about what might happen will have caused us to make different decisions today. It’s going to be an entirely different future, my love. You will see.”

Elain rocked a little closer, until she could stretch up and press a soft kiss to Lucien’s cheek, right over his scar. “I hope that you are right.” She replied, her fingers stroking his skin then. “I really hope that you are right.”


	260. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty

**Chapter 260**

Elain paced back and forth in the tiny kitchen of Rhys’ cabin. Cassian had lifted himself to sit on the kitchen table, his wings tucked tightly in behind him while Feyre chewed her bottom lip, leaning against the doorframe. Lucien stood near to Elain, reaching a hand out to catch her wrist as she passed, and she allowed him to draw her into himself, one of his strong arms coming around her waist as he held her firmly. Unable to continue her pacing, Elain’s eyes swept the room instead. She glanced at Nesta, standing by the sink, a thoughtful expression on her sister’s beautiful face. Elain understood that after what she had just told everyone. 

“And you have no way to know if that dream was a true vision or not?” Azriel asked, seated in one of the chairs at the kitchen table. Elain shook her head, wishing that she could offer something more helpful than that. Lucien’s arm tightened around her waist, and she pressed back into him, thankful for the comfort of his warmth and firm chest at her back.

“No… I only know what I saw.” She said, feeling heat flush her cheeks. “I think it was today… and those Illyrians attacked. There were a lot of them. More than I thought they had. They went right through the camp as if it were nothing, and they had no problem with the rest of you.”

Cassian exchanged a look with Azriel that Elain couldn’t read, and she turned her head to look up at Lucien. He met her eyes for a moment before returning his gaze to their friends. “Whether Elain can say for certain or not…” her mate said, “We should take this seriously. We need to act as if it is a vision, because if we do nothing and it turns out to be true, we will regret it.”

“He’s right.” Nesta said, resting her hip against the bench. “Elain has these visions for a reason. That reason is to warn us of things like this.”

“Certainly.” Cassian said, tilting his head back to look at Nesta. “The only question is as to what we plan to do about it.”

Elain wanted to leave. That was all her brain kept telling her. She wanted to get her sisters and her mate out of this place, because she was definitely unwilling to witness them die as she had in that dream. If they were not here, then it would not happen. She knew that Cassian and the others were not going to leave, however, because then those who lived here would have no protection at all from what was to come. Elain knew that staying was the right thing to do, as they had to help as many as they could. That didn’t mean that she didn’t still want to run away, though.

Lucien lifted one of his arms, wrapping it around Elain’s chest from behind, and an instant later she felt his lips against her cheek. She knew that he was aware of what she was thinking, and she released a heavy sigh. Lucien wouldn’t judge her for it, and Elain was thankful for that.

“What are you thinking?” Feyre asked, and Elain panicked for an instant. She had thought that her younger sister was directing her question her way but, when she looked at Feyre, those pale eyes were focused entirely upon Cassian. The Illyrian turned his head toward his High Lady, his expression probably more serious than Elain had ever seen him.

“We make a stand.”

“A stand?” Lucien asked, “Where?”

“The biggest place in town.” Cassian said, his eyes turning Lucien’s way. “The training square. We get everyone in there, as many as we can… and we defend it.”

“Isn’t putting everyone in one place dangerous?” Nesta asked, “Isn’t that just creating a target?”

“The whole place is already a target.” Cassian replied, “This way, instead of having to defend them in several locations, we can do it in one place. We stand a batter chance of holding them off this way.”

Elain thought about that. She tried to imagine getting everyone into the training centre, and then she wondered just how Cassian intended to defend the place. What was he going to do? Stand in the doorway and refuse to let anyone else through? How long could he keep that up for? Was it even going to work? If her dream had been accurate, there were going to be far more of those bastards coming down here, and she didn’t know if they would stand anything close to a chance of defending against that many. 

Lucien’s lips brushed Elain’s cheek again, and she knew that he had been reading her down the bond. “I’d wager that Az and Cas have done this type of thing a hundred times before.” Lucien’s voice was a mere ghost against Elain’s ear, and she nodded as those words settled something deep within her. He was right. They had to have faced far worse things than this, and they would know exactly what they were doing. 

“Yes…” she murmured. 

“It’s already different to your dream.”

“I know…” She nodded. Even having told the others of her dream had changed how things would play out. Elain knew that, but she still couldn’t shake the awful feeling she had, or the images of the dream from her mind. She could still see Lucien struggling to get to her, that Illyrian standing over him, blade lifted high. 

“Right.” Cassian said, lifting himself to his feet. “Everyone get dressed and ready for the day. I want the whole camp in the training square within the hour.”


	261. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-One

**Chapter 261**

They weren’t convinced. Lucien could tell that the females they were all trying to usher into the training square were not convinced of the immediate threat, or that this was the solution. He could hear the murmuring, some of them who had not participated in the training the day before, lamenting the fact that they were unable to be at work, or doing their chores, and they wished to be allowed to go about their business. He understood that. They were a practical people, and they lived in the day to day. Still, he knew, they wouldn’t be able to live in their day to day if those bastards came back down here and slaughtered them all. 

“What does he want now?” A harried looking Illyrian woman Lucien suspected was a fair bit older than himself same to stand before him, not moving any further into the training square, and blocking those behind her who were trying to get inside. 

“Cassian?” Lucien asked, and she nodded, one hand on her hip. 

“He’s disrupted me yesterday, and now this?”

Looking at her, Lucien tried to work out how to respond. He knew that telling her to just move along, and that she would find out soon enough would not work. She would only get defensive and impatient and probably cause a bigger problem. He smiled instead, bringing out his old charming courtly smile that had so often flattered the females of any of the Courts he had spent time in. 

“He wishes to make an announcement, Lady.” He told her, watching as her demeanour changed. Her posture shifted and straightened and she became visibly less irritated and hostile. “This is a good place to defend against attack, and there may be cause to do just that.”

“He intends to defend us against an attack?” her brown eyes moved over Lucien’s face and he kept his courtly smile firmly in place. 

“He does.” He nodded his head, gesturing to the slowly filling space. “When everyone is safely inside, he will let everyone know just that.”

Lucien watched her turn her head, taking in the square, and she bit her lip. “Very well.” She adjusted the bag over her shoulder, and then continued inside. He watched her for a moment, noticing the way that she seemed to move into leading others around her to fill in empty places by the wall, before he looked around when Feyre came to stand beside him. 

“Is the street empty yet?” 

“Not quite.” She replied, “Some are proving a stubborn as you would expect Illyrians to be.”

“Ahh…” he would expect they would be quite stubborn indeed. “I do imagine they would not like being told what to do.”

“You would be correct.”

Lucien eyed his friend from the corner of his eye. Feyre was Cassian’s High Lady, and might know something he did not. “Are you aware?” he asked, “Of the rest of his plan?”

“I can guess.” She replied, her words coming out in what sounded like a sigh. “I’ve also let Rhys know.”

Lucien nodded, a little bit of relief moving through him then. The High Lord of the Night Court would be worth his weight in gold, and Lucien had never thought he would have been so relieved to hear that Rhysand was expected to turn up somewhere. “He will come?”

“Mmm…” Feyre gave a small shrug, “He said he would see to something…”

“What does that mean?”

“Not sure.” Feyre admitted, “But whatever it is will help…”

Lucien frowned, he knew that Rhys would never just leave Feyre to whatever fate something like this may have in store for her, but he didn’t like the sound of that vague response. Why couldn’t the High Lord come and sort out these Illyrians? “You don’t know what he’s going to do?” he pressed, wondering if she had intended to be so unspecific in her response. 

“I don’t know exactly what he is going to do.” She said, “But he will do something to help…”

Lucien doubted that he would have had such blind faith in Rhysand, but then the High Lord was not his mate. If Elain had have told him that she would do something to help him, he knew that he would believe her, even if he had no clue what that something would have been. Feyre trusted that Rhys was going to help, and so that would have to be enough for him.

Feyre gave Lucien a smile and then turned and headed inside, trying to help organise those who were setting themselves up on bedrolls and blankets and whatever else they had had time to grab before coming up here, and Lucien turned back to the door, waving the next lot inside. He recognised some of those he had helped train the day before, and they gave him smiles as they passed by. He hoped that, if it came to it, what they had learned yesterday would be enough to save their lives. 

When Elain passed by, mixed among the crowd, she still managed to catch Lucien’s eye and he watched her for a little while. She was holding her clipboard with her lists and organisation from the day before and, after a few minutes, he worked out what she was doing. It seemed as if Elain was checking off names and he realised that she was trying to work out if everyone had gotten to safety. Turning to look for Cassian, Lucien wondered if that was a job she had been allocated to do, or if it was something she had assigned herself.


	262. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Two

**Chapter 262**

Sitting by the window, Elain watched everyone who had crammed into the training square. Most were sitting on the floor, their arms around their knees or those nearby to them. All of their eyes were on where Cassian stood. She would have believed him, Elain decided. If she had have been one of those living here, and he had given an explanation similar to that which he had just delivered to these folk, Elain was sure that she would have believed him, and done whatever he had asked. 

That seemed to be the consensus here, too. Even those who had looked put out or irritated earlier now seemed thoughtful, and more than a few looked scared. She understood that too, because the visions from her dream still haunted her. Wondering what she would do if the attack came, Elain looked around the square once more, looking for Lucien. She spotted his vibrant ruby hair within seconds and she couldn’t look away. He was looking at the crowd in a way that was similar to what she figured she had just been, and she wondered what he was thinking. Reaching for the bond, she knew that he’d felt her when his eyes, both russet and gold, flicked her way, meeting her gaze across the square. Tilting her head, Elain set her features into a questioning expression, and he dipped his head in acknowledgement. 

If the attack came, Elain knew, she would find Lucien and not leave his side until it was over. There was absolutely no way that she was going to risk losing him and then wind up repeating what had happened in that dream. She was going to stick to her mate’s side. If they died, they would do it together. She knew that he’d felt her then, somehow gleaned her thoughts, because he frowned and began moving around the edge of the square as he approached her. She watched him come, trying to read his expression, but then he’d reached her and she looked up at him as he brought a hand up to her cheek. Elain let him wrap an arm around her, and she could see several of the nearby Illyrians turn to look at them, wondering what was going on. Elain returned her eyes to Lucien, though, not caring that they were being watched. 

“What are you thinking of doing, exactly, Petal?” he asked, voice quiet. 

“Staying with you.” She breathed, eyes locked on his face. She saw the relief that flooded him then, felt it down the bond, and he nodded. 

“If the attack comes?”

“Yes.” She nodded, holding his eyes, wanting him to feel her determination. “If it comes… I’m staying with you. I don’t want to be anywhere else, I don’t want to be separated from you.”

“Yes…” his fingers threaded into her hair, and he pulled her head back just a little. “Yes… we will stay together.” He told her, “That’s the plan.” Elain nodded her head, one of her own hands sliding from Lucien’s hip, around to his back.

Cassian’s plan hadn’t seemed that elaborate, and Elain didn’t know if he had presented it that way because it was simple, or because he didn’t want to confuse or scare everyone in the square. Perhaps that wasn’t all that there was to it, but it might have been. It did seem like Cassian to come up with a simple yet effective plan. 

“I have to help secure the perimeter.” Lucien’s hand went under one of Elain’s elbows and she allowed him to lift her to her feet. “Come with me?”

“Absolutely.” She tucked her clipboard beneath her arm, linking her other through her mate’s elbow as she held on to him. A sudden shiver moved through her and she froze for an instant, she thought she had masked it well enough, smiling up at Lucien, but his frown told her that she hadn’t. He’d felt it though the bond, that much was clear as he turned toward her, both of his hands coming up to her jaw, lifting her face so that he could see her better. 

“What was that?” he asked, “Elain?” he asked when she just shook her head, “What was that?”

“Nothing…” she murmured, “Just a shiver?”

“Are you cold?”

“No…”

He was staring at her, and she could feel his worry and confusion as his eyes moved over her, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he tried to look for something that was amiss. “What caused it?”

“I don’t know.” She replied, and that was true. “I’m not cold, and I feel fine… it was just a shiver.”

“No vision?” he asked, and Elain shook her head again. There had been nothing that had come with it, no images or feelings beyond the shiver herself. There was nothing that gave any clue, and she continued to shake her head as she looked up at her mate. Lucien’s hands slid to her shoulders and she felt him rubbing at her, as if trying to warm her. “You don’t feel sick?”

“No, Lucien…” she breathed, trying to reassure him. “It was nothing… there was nothi-” another shiver moved through her, and she shook hard enough that Lucien’s hands tightened on her, holding her to her feet. “Oh…” she breathed, a sense of surety moving though her that she couldn’t explain. “Oh…” she looked up and met her mate’s eyes. “They’re coming…”


	263. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Three

**Chapter 263**

Shadows passed overhead, and Elain had only just turned to look up when her mate had grabbed her, lifting her bodily off the ground, before he’d pulled her into a nearby garden. She’d gasped, but Lucien’s hand was over her mouth, stifling any sound she might make as his other arm, right around her body squeezed her back against himself. Realising that there was a legitimate reason for what he had done, Elain relaxed back against Lucien, lifting her eyes to the sky as he had done. She could feel his anxiety building and she watched silently as dozens and dozens of Illyrians flew overhead. 

Lucien’s breath was hot against her cheek, and she could feel him stiffening, hear his heartbeat increase and Elain turned her head to look at him. He dropped his hand from her mouth and she just stared at him for a moment. “By the Cauldron…” she murmured, “It’s happening…”

Panic hit Elain down the bond from Lucien then, before he evidently caught hold of it and forced it down. She saw him school his face into his Courtly mask of confidence, and then he smiled at her. “It’s alright, Petal.” He said, “We’re ready…”

“Are we?” She hadn’t realised that her hands were shaking before she felt Lucien take hold of them in his big warm hands. He held her steady, and she tried to focus on his heartbeat, her own shifting to match.

“Listen to me.” He said, and Elain’s brown eyes lifted to meet his, both russet and gold. “This will not be like your dream.” He said, “Every choice we have made since you awoke was different to that. Nothing will be the same, we have seen to it. It’s all going to be different.”

“What if it’s worse?” she asked, and Lucien frowned for a moment before he shook his head. 

“Not possible, Petal. In your dream we were unprepared and caught by surprise. Thanks to you, we are not.”

Elain nodded, trying to take in his words. They had put plans into action. Cassian had come up with a way to defend this place, and Feyre had said that she had told Rhys of the problem. Her friends were very good at this and very powerful, she knew that. 

It still didn’t stop the dread building within her, however. “Remember what we said…?” she asked, her eyes still on her mate’s face. “We’ll stay together.”

“I’m not letting you out of my sight, Petal.” His thumb traced Elain’s cheek, and warmth spread through her, soothing as it went. 

“Alright…” she leaned into his touch before he lowered his hand, his eyes moving around them for a moment. “Time to go…”

“Yes.” He stood up, climbing out of the garden, and he then reached back in to help Elain to her feet. Her own eyes scanned the sky as she came clear of the bush they had been hiding in. There were no more Illyrians in the air but, if her dream had been accurate, she knew that they were on their way from the lower streets. “We need to let Cassian know, if he isn’t already aware.”

“He has to be…” Elain’s gaze caught on the black swirling smoke, rising from the same place it had in her dream. She felt sick as she turned away. “He has to have seen them.”

“Let’s find out.” Lucien took her hand and pulled her along up the path as they headed back for the doors to the training square. She looked around them, thankful that everyone seemed to have gotten up here in time. Without anyone down in the streets, however, Elain knew that those Illyrians would find their way up here even sooner. They would know, with the streets empty, that something had happened and they would come looking, even more ready for a fight. The thought sent shivers through Elain, and she held tightly to Lucien’s hand. 

They skirted the edge of the building until they came to the first set of doors. Azriel was there, his eyes directed toward the smoke rising high into the air now, and Lucien came to a sudden stop before the Shadowsinger. 

“They’re here.” Azriel said, and Lucien nodded.

“They are.” Lucien’s fingers tightened around Elain’s wrist and she stepped closer to him, “Does Cassian know?”

“Saw them go over.” Azriel replied, and Elain frowned as she looked at him, wondering if he was really flickering in and out of the shadows, or if it were her imagination. “Everyone else is in position.”

“We’re on our way.” Lucien drew Elain further up the path, toward the narrow doorway that he had been assigned to defend. 

“Elain should go inside with the others…”

“Not a chance.” Elain replied, lifting her chin as she looked at her friend. Azriel’s gaze moved over her quickly, and she saw the moment that he realised that she would not be talked out of this or forced to leave her mate. He nodded in acceptance, and she turned to keep following Lucien. She would, after all, follow him anywhere.


	264. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Four

**Chapter 264**

It was bizarre, Lucien thought, that the screaming was coming from behind him, within the training square, as those inside became aware of the impending threat. They were well protected, he knew that, and nobody was going to get past Cassian, Azriel, or himself. It had seemed that everyone from the camp had come up here, and he was glad that nobody would be caught unprepared down in the town. He also knew that the absence of anyone down there would send those hunting them right up here. It wouldn’t be long until they had been found, and then he knew that they were going to have to fight. 

Glancing at Elain who stood silently at his shoulder, Lucien tried to remind himself that she would fare better by his side. He knew that he would do everything in his power to protect her and, having her where he could see her, he knew that he would not be worried about her, hoping that she hadn’t been hurt. It did still worry him, however, that she was being placed in greater danger out here with him than she would be inside with the others. There would be no talking her into going back there and hiding, however. Not that he wanted that either. Lucien frowned as he turned back to the road outside. This whole thing was messy, and he didn’t know what he should be doing. 

Elain’s gentle hand came to rest at his back and he gave her a thankful smile. “It’s okay, Petal.” He said, even though he didn’t know if that were the truth. He paused then, “Although… remember that you need to give me some space.” He pulled his sword free and made a slow motion around himself. “If I’m to fight, I’ll need space to move. I don’t want to end up catching you with a blade…”

“Yes…” She nodded and stood back a little, having taken a step away from him. He reached out to her then, hating that his words had made her retreat. She took his hand, her wide brown eyes looking up at him. He could see the fear in her face, and he could feel it down the bond. “If I tell you to get close, though.” He drew her in, tucking her to his side. “I want you to instantly get in here…”

“Alright…” She lay her cheek against his chest, and Lucien bent his head to press a kiss to her hair, breathing her in. He hoped that this wasn’t the last time he was going to be able to hold her in his arms. “Can we go home after this?” She looked up at him then, and Lucien pressed a soft kiss between her eyes. “Back to the Day Court?”

“Yes…” he knew his voice was thick, and warmth exploded through his chest. He wanted that so very much. He wanted that probably more than he had wanted anything in his life, aside from Elain herself. “Yes, we will go home after this.”

His mate leaned into him, letting out a sigh, and Lucien squeezed her a little. “Good…” she murmured, “I can’t wait.” Neither could he.

*

She could hear them coming, long before they came into view. The smoke had thickened, indicating new fires had been lit, and it swirled its way up the hill until it surrounded their building and Elain had to squint to actually see the Illyrians coming into view. Their whoops and calls had been clear enough for the past five minutes and they had had the intended effect, at least upon Elain. Her heart was thundering in her ears, and she knew that she was on the verge of panic. Lucien’s heartbeat, though, had remained steady in her head, and she focused on that as she watched her mate. 

He had placed himself in the centre of the doorway he was to defend, and Elain had stood to the side, keeping him in view, but making sure she kept out of the way. He had been right to remind her that he needed space to move. She wouldn’t have thought of it, and gotten too close, and then she would have ended up getting herself killed or preventing him from defending himself properly. It was something that she would have to watch, something that she would have to keep at the forefront of her mind. 

_The arrow came out of nowhere, striking Lucien in the chest, and he grunted, doubling over with a cry of pain. She gasped, falling backward as another followed it. Her mate fell backward, collapsing to the stone floor as thundering feet sounded outside an instant before several large shapes came though the doorway, dark wings spread wide…_

Gasping, Elain staggered, catching herself against the wall with a hand pressed to cold stone. Lucien’s eyes were on her, she could feel them, and she could hear that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he looked her over. “Petal?” he asked, and the concern was clear in his voice, “What did you see?”

Elain forced her eyes open, looking at Lucien as she tried to force herself to process what she had just seen even as her ears continued to ring. “Lucien…” she breathed, watching as he warred within himself to remain in the doorway, or go to her. “Arrows…” she said, her voice growing stronger, “They’re going to fire arrows at you…”

“They…” Lucien blinked and then hurriedly threw some sort of shield up in front of himself. Elain heard the arrows strike it, saw her mate flinch at the contact, and she watched with horror as he struggled to maintain the shield as several more arrows came their way. “Stay… there…” he breathed, and she knew he meant to stay behind the wall. “What was next…?”

“When you fell they came in…”

“Not… happening…” Lucien’s voice was a growl now, and Elain watched as he channelled more power into his shield.


	265. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Five

**Chapter 265**

Elain watched Lucien hold his ground. It seemed to her that he was practically glowing as he fought to hold his shimmering shield before himself, deflecting everything that the Illyrians were throwing at him. He seemed to stand even taller when the arrows stopped, and she watched him ready himself, widening his stance and adjusting his grip on his sword. His eyes, both russet and gold, flicked to her for just a second, and Elain felt him trying to memorise exactly what she looked like. Her heart hit her stomach then, and she realised that things were about to change. 

Shadows passed across the doorway and then Lucien swung his blade. The sound of metal on metal was jarring, and Elain’s heart jumped from her stomach to her throat. She felt utterly useless, standing there unable to help, while her mate blocked the doorway with his own body. 

Cassian had explained the idea behind it, hoping to bottleneck the many attackers, forcing them to come through the limited number of doors. Those doors were to be defended just as Lucien was doing, and Elain understood that this was the best chance they had in eliminating the numerical advantage their opponents possessed, but that didn’t make it easier to see Lucien facing them alone like he was. 

Similar sounds of battle reached Elain up the hallway, and she imagined that Azriel was doing the exact same thing as her mate in the doorway they had left him in. Her breath caught in her throat when she looked back at Lucien, taking in the focused look on his face, and the lightening way in which he moved, blade flashing in the sunlight. She shook, standing there and not knowing what to do. There was nothing she could do, she knew. Her fighting skills were minimal, and she would only get in the way if she even tried, also the doorway was only big enough for Lucien, and that had been the idea. The best she could hope for was to avoid distracting him, to avoid being a weakness that could get him hurt. Elain thought for a moment that she might have been better off staying inside where she wouldn’t be a weakness for him, but she knew that they both would have been distracted by the distance and the uncertainty. They would have constantly been wondering and worried, and that would be have been dangerous. It had been the best choice to stay with him, but she still felt so useless.

Footsteps behind Elain had her swinging back around, almost expecting to see a horde of angry Illyrians charging at them. That was somewhat the sight that greeted her, but these Illyrians were female, and they bore makeshift weapons which even Elain could tell would be no match for the deadly blades the males outside were so adept at wielding. She was too stunned to do or say anything for an instant. It had seemed so impossible only days ago that these females would even consider picking up arms like this, so she was a little impressed, but at the same time she realised that their presence here was not what Cassian had planned for. His defensive ideas relied heavily on the bottleneck, and Elain did agree that that was their best chance. Open battle was not going to go in their favour against these highly trained warriors. 

“No…” she breathed, putting a hand out in the hopes of stopping them. They didn’t listen to her, however, letting out screams and cries as they approached the door. “No!”

Lucien turned his head just a little, and Elain saw the surprise cross his face, but then the distraction had cost him, and she gasped as one of the Illyrian blades ripped into his shoulder. The pain reached Elain down the bond an instant before Lucien shut it down, keeping it from her and he staggered back a step, throwing his sword up to deflect the next blow. She saw him hesitate in his next movement when one of the females stepped too close, and that cost him as well. The Illyrian immediately before Lucien had struck him, sending him back several steps and then the huge form moved through the doorway, wings spreading wide. 

Fear spiked through Elain, watching as Lucien stumbled. The Illyrian struck him again and his sword dropped to the stones with a clatter. Her mate ducked then, and Elain saw him fling a hand out toward the doorway. A faint golden shimmering there told her that he’d thrown a shield over the entrance, preventing any further attackers coming through. They already had one to face, and Elain was struck with disbelief as the Illyrian females surrounded their enemy before leaping. There was much shrieking and screaming as they tried to work out the best way to attack him, but nothing they did was very effective. With one sweep of his arm, he sent four of the females flying, and the sounds they made as they hit the opposite wall and floor made Elain sick to her stomach. She could tell immediately that at least one of them wasn’t getting up again. 

Outraged screams from the doorway caught Elain’s attention next, and she watched with uneasiness as the warriors there battered against Lucien’s shield. She could feel her mate’s waning strength, and she went to move toward him, skirting around the females who had leaped onto their enemy, some of them clinging to his wings and back. It was a sight Elain didn’t think she would be forgetting, when they somehow managed to pull him to the ground, blades flashing as they brought them down into him over and over. 

Horrified, Elain watched, forgetting everything else around her for a moment. She heard the shield give way then, turning her see two more Illyrians step through into the hallway. Lucien made a feral sound, and Elain felt a shield go up around her, golden light glittering before her eyes as a savage blade swung her way. She knew that if her mate hadn’t shielded her, that she probably would have just lost a limb or her life, and she staggered away. Lucien’s hand grabbed hers, and he pulled her away, pushing her behind himself as he sent a wave of flames at the two who had just come through the door. Their screams were louder than anything else around them, and Elain found herself struggling to draw breath. 

“We’ve been breached.” Lucien said, turning to push her up the hallway. “Get everyone back into the square.”

Moving without even realising what she was doing, Elain began herding the females before her back they way they had come. “Back!” She cried, “Everyone back into the square! Now!” They did as she bid, which surprised her, but within minutes she had gotten them back into the training square, not allowing any of them to slip past her. Lucien had followed behind, sending wave after wave of flames back down the hallway to keep anyone from getting too close. 

It appeared that they hadn’t been the only ones to fail at keeping their entrance defended. Azriel was retreating into the square as they arrived, and only moments later Feyre appeared doing the same thing, looking more exhausted than Elain could even imagine she had ever felt. 

“We can’t hold it.” Lucien said, and Azriel frowned, his eyes sweeping the square. Elain did the same thing, looking for Cassian, hoping that there was a backup plan and that they weren’t all about to be massacred.


	266. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Six

**Chapter 266**

Elain’s heart pounded in her chest, her blood thrumming through her veins and she felt almost electrified. Her mate’s heartbeat kept a steady rhythm in her head, and she relished in that sound. It meant that he was alive and that was just the way she liked it. Her eyes swept the square, taking in the way that most of the Illyrian females were now facing the walls, their makeshift weapons and blades in their hands. Elain could see the fight in them now, she could see the way that they sway and shuffled, and she could almost feel the anger within them. They were done being quiet now. Smiling at that thought, she turned again to look for Nesta and Cassian.

“Where’s Nes?” she asked Feyre who shook her head, running a hand though her hair. 

“I have not seen her…”

“She’s likely with Cassian.” Azriel put in and Elain nodded, looking up at him. 

“Yes,” she agreed, “But where is he?”

“He may still be defending his position.”

Elain’s eyes slid to Lucien and he nodded his agreement. “Could be…” Her mate said, “He wouldn’t be easily moved…”

Elain knew that was true, especially if Nesta had been with him. The two of them were stubborn enough to remain, even if they were in danger of being overrun. That thought didn’t fill Elain with confidence, wishing that her sister would come back to her, let her know that they were safe. On the other hand, both Nesta and Cassian were likely too stubborn to die, and that was a much better way of thinking. Lucien’s hand touched her shoulder, and Elain looked up at him, knowing that he had read something of what was going through her mind.

“We have to do something.” Feyre said, and Elain saw her sister’s pale eyes sweeping the square before lifting to the sky above them. Looking up, Elain squinted until she could see the faint shimmering of the shield Cassian had put across as a roof to keep their attackers out and prevent them from attacking from the air. “They’re going to overrun the place…”

“Do you think they’ll get in?” Elain asked, and Feyre didn’t reply. Elain looked them from Azriel to Lucien, and both of them had glanced at her before lifting their own gazes to the sky. They didn’t need to say anything for her to read that response. Yes. They would get in.

Sliding her hand into Lucien’s, Elain bit her lip as she gazed skyward. If that shield broke, there would be no stopping them. Her blood had begun to feel like ice in her veins, and she felt more useless than ever. She looked toward the door to the square that lead to the hallway Cassian and Nesta had been defending. It was the only one still clear and open. For a second she considered what might happen if they all tried to sneak out that hall and made a run for it. She knew they wouldn’t get far, and she dismissed the idea a moment later. They had to stay and defend this place, that was their only option. Lucien squeezed her hand, and she was thankful that they would have the chance to defend it together. They had promised one another that they wouldn’t be separated, and they would be able to keep that promise here.

The pounding on the doors that they had fled through grew louder, and Elain began to wonder just how long those shields would last. 

“If we’re going to defend here,” Lucien said, and everyone’s eyes turned his way, “We will need Cassian and Nesta with us.” His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked up at the sky, “We will need their strength, their power, to maintain these defences…” Lucien lifted one hand, making a vague gesture up above and around them. He stood a little straighter than he had been, and it was evident that his mind was moving quickly, going over any number of scenarios. 

“That’s the truth.” Azriel murmured gently, and turned toward the door they were clearly all waiting for Cassian and Nesta to walk through. “I’ll check on them…” He strode for the door then, and Elain just watched until he disappeared.

Lucien’s arm slid around Elain’s shoulders when the pounding on the doors grew louder. She could hear his heartbeat in her head growing more and more erratic, and she could feel his worry. The emotion poured from him, and Elain reached for the bond, wondering if she could take some of it from him. When she felt it, she pushed forward, reaching deeper, searching for the part that felt more like Lucien. The worry wrapped around her, even as she wrapped herself around her mate and she pressed her face into his shoulder as he held her.

“I’m so thankful that I have you.” She breathed, and she felt his reaction to those words as well. 

“As I am for you.” He replied, heat pouring from him now. Elain felt that heat burning away the worry, and she smiled. “We will get through this, love.” He breathed, lips against her ear, and Elain nodded. “We will get out of here, and we will go home.”

“I know.”

Movement nearby caught Elain’s eye and she felt herself relax just a little bit when Azriel returned flanked by Cassian and Nesta. They were just fine, and Elain tried to use that bit of information to reassure herself about whatever they would have to do next. They had lost all exits now, and she knew that the entire building was surrounded. The pounding on the doors hadn’t lessened at all, and some part of her felt the magic in the shields begin to shift. They would not hold forever, and Elain knew that whatever they were going to do, they would have to do soon.


	267. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Seven

**Chapter 267**

Movement in the still air was the first thing that Lucien noticed, and then the screams. Turning his head toward the sudden breeze, he froze for a moment when she saw that the shield Azriel had put up over his entrance had fallen and a dozen of the Illyrians had come through, wicked blades lifted high. He moved then, running for the doorway, throwing up a shield of his own to stop any more getting into the square, and he could feel Azriel and Cassian moving with him, as he drew his sword. The females beat them there, however, and horror rose within Lucien as several of them were cut down before they had even had the chance to try and fight.

Lucien’s eyes focused on the closest Illyrian, watching as that horrible blade was lifted again, ready to come down on a young female, and Lucien threw himself between them, lifting his own sword to catch that blade and deflect it. He heard the female shriek and, out of the corner of his eye, he saw her retreat a little, but then he was caught up in the fight, trying desperately to keep from losing his head. He hated fighting Illyrians. Lucien had decided that pretty early on in his life, and everything he’d had to do today had only reinforced that decision. Growing up, Lucien had been used to fighting and practising against others who had had similar training. There had been rules and style, and even his brothers had followed them. The Illyrians didn’t. Lucien couldn’t pick a style out of anything they did, and it felt to him like a brutal onslaught of savagery. Every movement felt random, and he felt like he was constantly on the defence, trying to avoid being injured and without a moment to launch an attack of his own.

By the time he’d bested the first opponent, the second was on him without a second to spare, and he found it difficult to keep up with what was going on around him. Unable to focus on anything else, Lucien became a series of fluid movements, blocking and avoiding back and forth over and over. When the Illyrian before him fell, Lucien took a moment to listen as he stepped over the body. The sounds of fighting echoed all around the square and he could see the chaos of battle spread across the whole space. Moving as quickly as he was able, Lucien managed to cut down the next Illyrian without getting caught up in the fight, and he went for the one behind him as swiftly as he was able.

Fear rushed into Lucien down the bond, and he ducked a swipe from the Illyrian he was currently fighting, spinning glance back across the square to look for Elain. He didn’t see her, and didn’t have the time to keep looking because he had been suddenly charged and tackled, and he found himself sprawled across the ground, grunting as a heavy weight landed atop him. Kicking himself free, Lucien pushed himself to his knees, trying to get enough height and space to be able to swing his sword effectively. Receiving an elbow to the ribs instead, Lucien grunted and fell to the side, willing himself to get up again as he clenched his teeth. Panic hit him then, and he knew that it came from his mate. He snarled, and wrenched himself free from the grip of the Illyrian still trying to pin him down. 

Managing to get himself free, Lucien rolled to his feet, staggering away. He didn’t care that he hadn’t beaten the Illyrian, he needed to get up and find Elain. There was screaming all around him, and chaos moving everywhere he looked. There was blood and gore, and more than a few bodies on the ground, tripping and slipping him up. He walked right over the dead, his eyes sweeping the area he had last seen his mate. “ELAIN?” he called, panicking a little when he wasn’t immediately able to spot her. “ELAIN?” he skid to a halt, right where she had been standing not ten minutes earlier. She was not here now. “Elain…?” Turning, he tried to look for her among the scattered fighting. There were groups huddled by the walls, trying to stay out of the way, and there was Cassian, Azriel, and Feyre taking on several of those who had come through the fallen shield. More than a handful of the Illyrian females they had trained were also trying their best against several of the Illyrians. 

Lucien took several steps across the square when he spotted Nesta. His mate’s elder sister stood in front of a group cowering by the wall. She held an Illyrian blade in her hand, her eyes tracking everything that moved nearby. Lucien could tell that she was ready to destroy anything that came at her and those she stood defending. He stopped moving when he noticed that Elain was not one of them. 

When pain hit him then, knowing it was Elain’s, Lucien swung wildly around, looking for her. If he couldn’t see her, he would make sure that he could take stock of the threat. There were six left. Cassian was taking on two, Azriel and Feyre had another two. The handful of Illyrian females still fighting were surrounding one, who didn’t appear to be having a great time, but that left one more. Lucien spotted him nearby, bending over a wooden planter box, reaching for something and attempting to drag it out. A slender leg appeared, kicking at the Illyrian, and then Lucien was running. He had time to see Elain thrashing as she was pulled from behind the box, and the Illyrian grabbed hold of her, hauling her up a little, before Lucien threw himself at the male with brutal hands on his mate.

Crashing to the ground, Lucien struck repeatedly at every part of the Illyrian he could reach. He had been so caught up in panic and rage at seeing what was being done to Elain that he hadn’t even had time to consider what he was doing. When his brain caught up to him, Lucien pressed his hands to the Illyrian’s chest and then reached for the power he had been beginning to understand. The light he had inherited from Helion felt different to the fire he was so familiar with, but he found it easily and with barely a flicker of a thought, he pushed it into the Illyrian. When he had done something similar before, defending his mate against his brothers, Lucien had been somewhat detached, It had been instinctual and he hadn’t really remembered what had happened. This was not like that. This was deliberate. He pushed that light with purpose, hot and burning, and when he saw the Illyrian turn to ash before his eyes, Lucien felt relief. 

Pushing himself to his knees again, Lucien dusted his hands. Elain’s sob caught his attention then and he scrambled toward her, managing to catch himself and pull back, making sure that his hands were gentle when he touched her. 

“Petal?” he breathed, fingers skimming her arm. She turned toward him, reaching out, and Lucien felt like he was able to breathe properly for the first time since that shield had gone down when her arms wrapped around his neck and she just about crawled into his lap. “Elain, are you hurt?” he asked. 

“I…” she hesitated, and he tried to look her over the best he could while she was pressed firmly against him. “I don’t think so…”

“Okay…” he held her there, his eyes sweeping the square again, watching as Azriel struck down the last of their attackers. Satisfied that they were not in immediate danger, at least for the moment, Lucien looked down at his mate once more. He could see that her knees were skinned and bleeding, as were her elbows, and he wondered if she hadn’t fallen over the planter box in her panic. 

“Are you hurt?” she asked, lifting a hand to his cheek, and he noticed that her wrists and palms were skinned and bloody too. 

“I’m fine, Petal.” He reached for her down the bond, and her relief felt cool and sweet. He bent to press his lips to her forehead then, and he smiled when her fingers sank into his hair. “Can you stand?” he asked, and he felt her nod. “Good… We’re not safe yet.”

Pulling Elain up, he helped her over to a nearby bench, his eyes moving from doorway to doorway, watching as the Illyrians outside continued to pound on the shields that were still holding. Their attackers were not going to leave, he realised. Unless someone figured out something they could do from within this square, there would be no getting out of here without a fight, and Lucien knew that they would not win up against so many.


	268. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Eight

**Chapter 268**

Feeling overwhelmed, Elain tried to block out the sounds of the pounding and the sobbing and the open crying that was echoing around the square. Her whole body hurt and, as Lucien knelt before her, she tried to work out if she was actually injured. There was blood on her legs, and she frowned as she looked at them but, after a few seconds, she figured that she had simply scraped her knees when she had fallen and it wasn’t that bad. Lucien lifted her hands, turning them over, and Elain saw that she had skinned the palms of her hands too. Her mate ran his fingers gently down her arms, over her uninjured skin, and then he lifted his gaze to hers. 

“Petal?” he asked, “Are you hurt anywhere else?” his eyes, both russet and gold, held hers, and she bit her lip as she tried to work out where the pain was coming from. 

“I don’t think so…” she replied. 

“Here…” Lucien lifted one of his hands again, laying it against her arm and she felt heat beneath his touch. “I can fix it up…”

“Don’t.” Cassian said, his voice sharp. “You’re going to need to save your energy.”

Lucien went rigid, his eyes flicking up to look at Cassian, and Elain thought she heard a soft snarl slip from her mate. “She’s hurt…”

“It’s just a few scrapes and bruises.” Cassian replied, “She will be fine. We are going to need every drop of power you’ve got…”

Elain could feel Lucien’s reluctance to leave her bleeding and in pain. He hadn’t lifted his hand from her skin, but the gentle heat had stopped. She watched him as he just stared up at Cassian, his eyes narrowed, and she could just about see his brain ticking over as he considered what the Illyrian had said. “I…”

“Every drop.” Cassian repeated. 

Lucien did snarl then, low and dangerous, and Elain reached out to gently touch his shoulder. Those eyes snapped around to her and she could see something primal moving behind his russet eye. “Lucien, love…” she whispered, leaning closer to him. He leaned into her then, and she could feel him breathing her in. She ran her fingers over his shoulder, knowing that her scent was helping to calm him down. “I’m alright…” she breathed, pressing her lips to his cheek. “Like Cassian said, it’s just a few scrapes.” She felt him press his face against her throat, still breathing her in deeply, and she ran her hand down his back, knowing that touch was helpful in his efforts to control this side of himself. He was struggling against instinct, a primal urge to do something when she was hurting. Elain knew that she might be able to use that. “You can heal me later…” she whispered, her lips against his ear, “Cassian is right. You need your strength now… I need you to protect me…” He stiffened at those words, and Elain looked around the square, her hand still moving against his back. “We’re still in danger…” she went on, “They could get in here again… and you need to be at full strength.” She thought about the fighting he had already done, both outside and in here, and she closed her eyes. “Well, as string as we can make you…”

“I’m strong enough.” He breathed, and Elain nodded, her hand tracing up and down his spine. “I’ll keep you safe…”

“I know.” She told him. 

He lifted his head then, meeting her eyes once more, and Elain gave him a gentle smile. “And I will heal you afterwards…”

“Yes.” Elain smiled more widely, bringing her hand to his cheek and laying it over his scar. “I look forward to that…” His eyes moved over her once more and then he had pushed himself to his feet. 

“I assume you have a plan?” he asked Cassian who tilted his head. 

“In theory…” The Illyrian lifted a hand to the back of his neck, his eyes thoughtful and the others all shifted as they waited for him to elaborate on what he had been thinking. “We need to use the shield…”

“We… are… using the shield…” Azriel said slowly, confusion clear in his voice. 

“As a weapon.” Cassian amended. “We need to use the shield as a weapon.”

Unsure she’d heard him correctly, Elain just watched Cassian for a second. Lucien tilted his head, that familiar thoughtful expression Elain was so fond of making its way across his features while Azriel frowned and looked back to the doors, watching as the Illyrians out there continued to beat against the shield. Nesta sank down onto the bench next to Elain, her eyes on Cassian as well, and Elain could just about see her sister’s brain trying to imagine what he had just said in practice. Feyre moved around them though, biting her lip, with interest clear on her face. 

“What do you mean, Cassian?” The High Lady of the Night Court asked, and Cassian turned toward her. 

“I’ve not seen it done.” He said, his words coming out in a rush. “But I’ve heard of it… and it makes sense…”

“Explain.” Feyre’s voice was calm, collected, and Cassian nodded. 

*

Lucien listened as Cassian explained his idea for turning the shield into a weapon. He understood the concept, and he thought he would be able to manage the skill behind it. The idea was to channel power into the shield and then push it further, just as he had pushed his magic into that Illyrian before and turned him into ash, he would push that magic into those trying to get past the shield. In his mind he would be able to rake through them, leaving nothing but ashes behind.

Of course, Lucien thought, that was the theory behind it. He had not done anything like that before, and he was only still just grasping control of the magic he had inherited from Helion. What would happen if he could not do it did not bare thinking about. Cassian had been right, though. He would need all of his strength to be able to contribute to this. It wouldn’t have taken much to heal Elain, he knew that. Her injuries were shallow and surface level, but he also knew that he wouldn’t be able to heal her at all later if they didn’t manage to defend this place and they all wound up dead. Oh, but how the sight of her blood made him ache. 

Elain got to her feet then, and the slightly vacant look in her eyes drew his attention. He reached out, his hands grasping her arms gently, as he looked at her face “Petal?”  
“Mmm…” Elain leaned into him, wrapping those arms around his neck as she went up on her toes. Lucien allowed her to press closer, sliding his own arm around her waist as he felt her lips brush against his ear. “You are going to be very good at using your Day Court magic.” She whispered, and Lucien felt a shiver move through him. “Trust it.” He nodded and she released him, her gaze shifting to where a large group was still huddled by the far wall. 

“You join them.” He told her, brushing a lock of hair back from her face and over her shoulder. “Keep them calm…”

“Yes.” She nodded and her eyes focused a little, “I’ll do that.”

As Elain walked away, Lucien turned his attention to Cassian and the others once more. Feyre was asking for specifics on how Cassian thought this was to be done, and they were trying to understand the practicalities behind it. Conversation drew to a halt then, when shadows passed overhead and they all looked up to see that half of their attackers had taken to the skies, coming to land on the shield above them as they seemed to swarm over the building, looking for any way in they could find. 

“Cauldron boil and fry me.” Lucien muttered, looking up at the dozens of Illyrians now smirking down at them through the shield above.


	269. Chapter Two Hundred and Sixty-Nine

**Chapter 269**

The females around Elain chattered softly, but Elain wasn’t listening to what they were saying. She was staring in horror at the shield above them when it became dark with large bodies and even larger wings. They really were surrounded now, not just by the four walls, but up there too. The thought terrified her. That was, until she realised that the little snippet of a vision she had had not ten minutes earlier of Lucien at some point in the future using his Day Court powers expertly, meant that he at least would survive. That gave her some hope. 

When those around Elain began noticing the Illyrians above them, the murmuring kind of hushed as fear spread wider. Elain forced herself to drag her eyes away from the threat above. She looked down, watching as the young Illyrian female beside her began carefully and gently binding Elain’s grazed wrist and palm with a soft bandage. 

“Thank you.” Elain said, giving her a smile. 

“It’s no trouble.” The reply came with a shy smile, and Elain wondered if she smiled at all often, “It’s a good thing I thought to bring bandages and the like… I thought we might need them.”

“It was good thinking.” Elain agreed, “I think there will be quite a few in need of your supplies before this is over.” Her eyes swept the group, catching on several of those who had been fighting in the hallway before Lucien had made them all flee back to the square. There were cuts and bruises already among them. Elain did not think those would be the end of it.

_  
“It’s coming down!” Cassian yelled, and Azriel and Lucien spun as they hurried toward the doors. Elain watched her mate thrust both hands out, struggling to reinforce the shield as the Illyrians outside seemed to redouble their efforts as if sensing the weakness._

_Nesta ran across the square, ushering the Illyrian females back, against the far wall. Elain wondered what the point of that was, until she looked up again and saw the shield above them flickering as it faded. Horror shot through her as she realised what was happening. It was going to fail. They all were. The instant those shields failed, they would be overrun._

_“HOLD THEM!” Cassian yelled, stalking across the square, his own attention focused high above, and Elain watched him try to reinforce that shield. He sent a quick attack, a thin thread-like beam shooting from the shield to one of their enemies and the target screamed in pain. It wasn’t going to be enough, Elain realised. Not like that._

_When Azriel’s shield failed, Feyre threw up her own, struggling to maintain it as two of the Illyrians had gotten through and the Shadowsinger threw himself at them. Elain had just thought that he might have gotten things under control when Cassian let out a shriek and she looked up just in time to see the shield above disappear and dozens of great pairs of wings expand as bodies descended on them all._

_Screams erupted around Elain and the females scattered, some shrinking back against the wall and others taking off across the square. Elain found herself knocked to the floor, and she watched silently as faeries went in all directions. Their attackers followed, tracking those moving the fastest and cutting them down without so much as a scrap of inconvenience. Elain went cold, her eyes sweeping the square for her family. Feyre and Nesta were on the other side, still trying to keep their shield up over the door they were in front of, and Lucien was by the door they had come through earlier, his attention clearly split between his shield and the Illyrian who had just come at him, blade raised._

_Elain watched as her mate fought to defend himself, somehow managing to come away from his attacker whole as the Illyrian fell. Lucien backed toward the door and his shield as Cassian yelled again for them to keep their shields up._

_When the Illyrians outside the doors had realised that there was a way in, they moved away from the shields and launched themselves skyward. Elain watched, her breath caught in her throat, as they came over the walls, landing in the square, their expressions declaring just how pleased they were with the current situation. Elain realised then that she was still on the floor, in complete view of anyone who looked her way. She sat up, trying to make sure that nobody was paying her any attention. When she was fairly confident that they were all focused on something else, she shuffled her way toward the cluster of planter boxes, hoping to hide herself behind one._

_When she was crouched, and still sure that nobody had seen where she’d gone, Elain peered around again. Flames caught her attention, and she watched as her mate threw wave after wave of fire at several Illyrians who had Nesta and Feyre cornered. He hurried toward them, slipping beneath the swinging blade of one, and dragging his own sword through the chest of the next he passed. Forcing herself to release a breath and draw another, Elain watched her mate defend her sisters while Feyre appeared to be trying to shield the females who had once again clustered together nearby._

_It wasn’t enough. Elain could see that. There were too many of them to shield, and too many attackers. There was too much going on, and none of the efforts they were making were enough to withstand the onslaught. They were not going to win. Elain knew this, and ice seemed to slide through her veins when several of the Illyrians noticed what Feyre was trying to do, and made their way directly toward her. Lucien tried, that was obvious. He put himself in front of Feyre and Nesta once again, but two of the Illyrians leaped at him and he was swatted away after only seconds. There was nothing he, or indeed Elain, could do when those Illyrians drew their weapons on Feyre and Nesta and cut them down moments later._

_She couldn’t help the scream. She tried, but it ripped from her and drew immediate attention to her. Elain shrieked again, kicking as someone seized her by the hair and dragged her out from behind the wooden planter. She heard Lucien’s scream of protest, saw him trying to get to her. She saw the flames he held as light erupted from him, and then the Illyrian holding Elain had dropped her. She knew then what they should have done; what would have been effective.  
_


	270. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy

**Chapter 270**

Blinking, Elain looked again at the bandage being wound around her wrist. “It’s a good thing I thought to bring these supplies…” The young Illyrian female currently binding Elain’s wrist said. Elain’s breath caught in her throat as she looked up at her. These visions she had been having were coming more and more quickly, and she didn’t feel that she was being given adequate time between the vision and when she was evidently supposed to make some kind of change. “Are you alright?”

“Oh, yes.” Elain said, turning her head to look for the others. “Thank you for this…” she lifted her wrist and received a smile. 

“No worries.”

“Thank you…” Elain got to her feet and hurried toward the others. Cassian was explaining to them his idea for using the shield as a weapon, and she thought about the way he had attacked one of their enemies in her vision, that thread that had come from the shield and wounded one of the Illyrians above them. It hadn’t been enough, and it wouldn’t be effective. 

“You need more than that.” She said, and five pairs of eyes turned her way. 

“Why’s that?” Nesta asked, her brows furrowed. 

“I saw it.” Elain told them, glancing up when Lucien’s hand found her arm. 

“What did you see?” her mate asked. 

“I saw the shields fail, even as you were trying to use it to hurt them.” Her eyes went to Cassian, “They got in, and they were ruthless…”

“It won’t just be me.” Cassian replied, “Everyone will be using the shield to attack.”

“It won’t be enough.” Elain said, shaking her head. “That’s what I saw. Even the five of you individually trying to take out one or two here and there… it needs to be all of you channelling into one.” Her eyes went back to Lucien, “Use one another’s strength.”

“So,” Azriel murmured, “If we all pour our strength into the shield, and one of us wields it for a full strength attack…”

“The shields would likely hold longer with all of us supporting them.” Cassian agreed. Elain saw him look to Feyre then. “Does that work for you?”

“I think so.” Feyre nodded, her expression thoughtful. “I’ve used the magic of others before, I could probably figure out how to use it to attack…”

“Could you?” Nesta asked, “Do we have time for that?”

“I don’t think it would work that way.” Lucien sounded thoughtful and, this time, five pairs of eyes turned his way. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he gazed up at the shield, and that expression that Elain loved which told her he was deep in thought passed across his face.

“Why not?” Feyre asked, and Lucien looked down at her. 

“Because,” he replied, “we would be giving our strength to the shield, letting you have access to that. You wouldn’t have access to our unique abilities…” He blinked, “It would be raw, unshaped, magic.”

Elain watched as her younger sister grew uncertain. “Oh…” the High Lady of the Night Court pulled herself together, then. “You do it.”

“What?” Lucien took a step back, clearly surprised by that reply. 

“You do it, then.” Feyre repeated, her eyes on Lucien. “You know more about this, and you’ve had more time to develop your skills with magic anyway. You do it.”

Looking up at her mate’s face, Elain watched Lucien think about that. “Alright…” he turned his gaze upward once more, looking at the shield. “I think I can…” She watched him, thinking about the vision she’d had. The first one had been showing her that he would be very good at using his Day Court abilities in the future, so that was promising, and the second had been the cost of failure of the group all trying to work independently. 

Thinking about the end of her vision and the way he had come at the Illyrian who had grabbed her, she thought again about what he was to do. When Cassian began directing them all to pour their strength into the shields, Elain took her mate’s hand, meeting his gaze when he turned toward her.

“Petal?” he asked, and she tightened her grip on him, drawing him a little distance away from the others. “What is it?”

“You need to do more than just use the reservoir of power they’re giving you.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, and she loved the fact that he didn’t dismiss or disbelieve what she had said, he only asked for clarification.

Holding his hand tightly in hers, she told him about her vision and what he had done at the end. “You need to combine your own magic…”

“Use both?” he asked, “Day and Autumn?”

“More than that.” She replied, “What makes a thread stronger?”

“More than one…” he gestured at the others “All of us together…”

“Yes, but even stronger than that?” she asked, looking up at him. When he shook his head, she squeezed his hand. “Weaving them together.” She said. “Like a tapestry.”

“Tapestry…” he gazed down at her, that metallic eye clicking and whirring as he thought.

“Yes. Weave the threads of your own magic together. Day and Autumn, around one another, so one supports the other… use both of them together.” She leaned into him. “You are both of them… Ashk and Helion. Autumn and Day. They are both a part of you, and you will wield both sides of yourself.”

Elain felt the spark those words ignited within her mate and he looked at her silently for a few moments. “As you say, Petal.” He eventually murmured.

“You know the theory.” She told him softly, “It will be instinctual. The magic is within you, and you know how to use it.”

“It does have a habit of working well when I need it to…”

“Exactly.” She smiled, “You will do it perfectly. I have no doubt.”

“Thank you for the confidence, my love.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her in to press a kiss to the top of her head as Cassian called out to them. Elain looked up when Lucien released her, her eyes going to the shield above them. It was no longer flickering, and she could see the added strength. It would not easily fail now, but there would still be no escaping from here without getting rid of the Illyrians outside, and she knew there was only one way that was going to happen. She looked back to Lucien and saw the look of determination fill his features. He squared his shoulders and stood taller, before moving toward Cassian and the others, ready to give this his best efforts. He would succeed, Elain knew. She didn’t need her abilities as a Seer to know that.


	271. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-One

**Chapter 271**

The Illyrians peering down at them were taunting them. Lucien tried his best to ignore the jeers and jibes as he reached for the magic of the shields. There were vulgar gestures, and calls of threats and promises of things to come once they got in. It took rather a lot of self-control to pretend he couldn’t hear the descriptions of what would be done to his mate, and he hoped that Elain hadn’t heard it herself. They were stupid if they thought that saying those things would make him weak. If anything, it only improved his determination to keep them out, to ensure that not a one of them would get anywhere near her.

The taunting, it seemed, was having the desired effect on Cassian. Lucien saw him scowling up, swearing from between clenched teeth, and he thought for an instant to say something to the Illyrian, but he held his tongue.

When Lucien took hold, in his mind, of the shield, he just about gasped at the amount of raw power he was met with. It was almost as if he could feel each individual strand, as if each thread that had come from someone different was somehow identifiable. He could feel the wildness of Cassian, the stoic quiet strength of Azriel, he could feel the strangeness of Feyre, able to tell she was different somehow, and he could feel the savagery and icy rage of Nesta. All of them were there, and they were all waiting for him to use what they had given. He didn’t know how. 

He staggered. Lucien hadn’t been aware that he had, but someone grabbed his elbow, righting him, and he knew that he had staggered. It was too much power, though. How was anyone meant to harness that kind of energy and magic.

“Do it.” Feyre said, and he could hear the worry in her voice. “You need to do it, now.”

“It’s too much…” he breathed, “I… I don’t…” Shaking his head, he skirted that reservoir of power he had located.

“Lucien…” Feyre said, “You’re the cleverest person I know…”

“He doesn’t know what he’s doing…” One of the Illyrians called from above them. Lucien looked up to meet his dark eyes. “It doesn’t matter… we’ll get in…”

“Yeah,” Another added, laugher in his voice. “That’ll be fun.”

“It will.” The first called down to them, “I’ve never had High Fae cunt before.” He smirked, “Think I’ll spend some time with the pretty one…”

Lucien’s blood went cold, and then hot. He felt something burning from within him and turned his attention back to the shield. He remembered what Elain had said about weaving a tapestry, and he reached for the closest thread of magic; this one belonging to Nesta. Her cold rage began to seep into him and he let go in a hurry. 

“Pull yourself together.” Cassian snapped at him, and Lucien blinked. “You have the ability to do this better than any one of the rest of us. You were born to be a High Lord. You may not have the title yet, but you will. You’re capable of taking and wielding endless amounts of power. So do it!”

Before he could even respond to that, Lucien felt Elain move up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist. He felt her press her forehead into his back as she settled against him, and then he realised that she was wrapping the both of them in the golden glow of the bond which tethered them together. Whatever she was doing made him feel stronger, and he was thankful for her for about the thousandth time that day. Nodding, he reached for the shield again, grasping one of Nesta’s threads with more confidence before he grabbed one of Feyre’s, and began weaving them around one another. 

Before long, Lucien had a strong grip on everything his friends had given him and he wrapped himself in their power and their strength. He thought again about what Elain had said to him about how he would one day be very good at using the power he had inherited from Helion, and then he remembered what she had told him about how he was made equally from Autumn and Day. Both of those Courts had felt like home to him, and he knew that they were both a part of him. She had said that he should use both of them, and he wondered if he would be able to weave them together like he had done with the magic from the others. 

Picturing his flame within his mind, Lucien tried to call forth the light he’d gotten from Helion. A golden glow began to surround him, everywhere in his mind, and he pushed it toward his fire. The flame glowed more brightly, and Lucien tilted his head. Was that it? Was that how it worked? How was he going to turn that into a weapon?

He tried to move the flame, wondering how he would be able to control it and he found it worked well. The light seemed to emanate from the flame, surrounding it and he wondered if he could use that to guide it. 

“Alright…” he murmured, “I think that I might have it…”


	272. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Two

**Chapter 272**

Light seemed to come from within him. Elain watched Lucien, transfixed by the way his skin began to glow, and his hair turned to molten metal licked by flames. He was already unfailingly handsome, but now he seemed to become something else. Pure power moved within him, and she couldn’t look away as he lifted his hands.

Cassian had been right, Elain thought. Lucien had been born to wield a power far greater than any of the rest of them. He was a High Lord. The title was not yet his, but it would be. That was who he was. That power would one day come to him, and he would be capable of holding it, of using it. He had been born to do so. She was glad that Cassian had told him that, and she watched as Lucien took a few steps before he turned to look back at them. 

“This will kill them…” his words were directed at Cassian and Azriel, and Elain knew that he was checking to see if they were alright with that. 

“… they’re trying to kill us.” Azriel said in response after a moment.

Lucien seemed to accept that answer, and he began moving across the square. The talk among the Illyrian females grew as they began to notice what was happening. Elain saw them watching Lucien with wide eyes and anticipation and what came close to what she thought was awe. She couldn’t blame them for that, he did look very impressive like this. Her eyes returned to her mate as he stopped walking and lifted his hands higher. The shield seemed to glow above him, reacting to whatever it was that he was doing, and then a bright light appeared to emerge from the very apex of the shield, growing brighter and brighter. 

Elain watched, holding her breath, as that light arched out from the centre and cut through three Illyrians. Their screams were high-pitched but were cut off as they fell, landing somewhere beyond the walls of the training circle. As Lucien began to walk again, his eyes on their attackers above, the arching light followed, cutting through flesh and limbs and wings as he directed it to do so. There was nothing that could be done against it, it seemed. They all watched as the Illyrians tried to throw their own magic against it, but to no avail. If they did not get out of the way, they died. Many of them died and, after a while, Elain found herself wondering how high the piles of bodies would be outside when they finally were free. 

“Did you think he could do this?” Nesta was at Elain’s side, watching Lucien move with her. 

“Do what?” Elain asked, unsure of what her sister meant. “Kill them? Or, control magic like that?”

“Both…” Nesta breathed, and Elain nodded her head. 

“Yes,” she replied, “I knew that he could do both.”

She watched Lucien move his hand wide and, above them all, that light arched light lightening and cut through several more Illyrians. Some of them had decided to flee, she could see that. More than a handful of them had launched themselves skyward, disappearing up into the mountains, but more had stayed, and a few had returned to the doorways nearby, pounding on the shields there as if hoping to distract Lucien and cause the defences to fail. Lucien wasn’t giving them any attention, however. His eyes remained fixed above them as he continued to eliminate the Illyrians a handful at a time.

When Cassian came to stand by Nesta, Elain glanced at him and his eyes met hers. “It’s impressive.” The Illyrian said, “That his control is so effective…”

“Like you told him,” Elain replied, pride blooming within her, “he was born for it.”

“Yeah,” Cassian said, his gaze returning to the shield and what was happening above them. “It sure looks like it.”

Elain narrowed her eyes then, looking at him. “That’s what you told him…”

“That’s what he needed to believe.” Cassian replied, “And now he does.”

“You didn’t believe it?”

He gave a shrug, “I sure hoped it was true.”

Elain felt her jaw drop looking at Cassian before shifting her gaze to Azriel who was watching them with an almost amused expression on his face. She felt a moment of annoyance that they hadn’t believed in Lucien the way she had, but then she felt relief that Cassian had known what to say anyway, and that it had worked. He had been right, anyway, she figured. It didn’t matter if it hadn’t been something he had believed at the time. It was true all the same. 

Forgetting about the others, at least for the time being, Elain looked at her mate. His skin still glowed, and he was stalking around the square now, his arm sweeping back and forth as he continued to seek the threat above them. His ruby hair was resplendent and Elain thought that this had been what she had always pictured fae males to look like when she had been mortal. Powerful and dangerous, but so very beautiful. Pride bloomed even more brightly within her, and it took a great deal of will power to hold herself where she was and not cross the square to touch him. She had to leave him be, let him finish what he was doing. She had told him earlier that she needed him to protect her, and that was what he was doing now. He would need to complete the job, and she knew that he wasn’t going to stop until he had cleared every last threat from outside that shield.


	273. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Three

**Chapter 273**

Bodies continued to fall, and Elain tried not to watch as blood slid across the shield and down the walls. There were pieces of limbs and wings everywhere, and it was truly a horrific mess. The images of this would haunt her for a long time, she knew. Some of the Illyrian females had buried their faces in shawls of their sleeves and knees, trying to keep themselves from watching as well. It was utter carnage, and Elain found herself thankful that she couldn’t smell it. Somehow, the shield was keeping the metallic tang of blood from the air, although she suspected that once they got out there, she would find it different. Bowels too, she reminded herself, remembering the smell that came with bodies being ripped or slashed in half, rupturing bowels and releasing what was inside. She had found that surprising when she had noticed last time she had been surrounded by gore like this. 

Realising then that it was likely going to fall to those huddled by the wall to clean everything up outside, Elain felt sorry for them. She had no idea how anyone would manage that. What would be done with all of the bodies? Would they have to burn them? It would take quite a bit of work to get them all piled up and ready for the fire. Who would have to scrub these walls to get the blood off? It didn’t seem fair to her. They had been threatened and attacked, and then they would be the ones who would have to spend days cleaning this mess up. It also didn’t escape Elain’s notice that she was fixating on this in order to distract herself and avoid taking any more of the horror around her.

Lucien stopped then. It was sudden and drew the attention of everyone around them. He stopped walking, the light faded, and bodies stopped falling. Elain reached for him down the bond, wondering what had happened because there were still Illyrians outside who had not fled, and who were still sizing them up, trying to work out a way in. Through the bond, Elain could feel Lucien trying to reign himself in. He had stopped himself deliberately; it hadn’t been a failure or expenditure of the power he was wielding. 

“Run out of energy?” Called one of the Illyrians, and Elain recognised him as the one who had been taunting them before. 

“No.” Lucien’s voice sounded rough, almost feral. “I’m giving you a chance to leave.” He went on. “You can see what will happen if you stay…”

“Oh!” The Illyrian called, “You think you’ve won…”

“Perhaps you’re not seeing what we are.” Nesta spoke up and Elain’s eyes flicked toward her elder sister. “You’re dying… You’re all dying…”

“Your mistake, Lady,” The Illyrian sneered, “to think that this is all of us…”

Elain felt as if icy water had been dumped over her head. “What…?”

“We told others,” he told them, his face twisting into a mask of rage, “They’ll be arriving any time now…”

“And the same thing will happen to them!” Feyre threatened.

“Not likely!” came the reply, “This one cannot keep this up forever.” He gestured down at Lucien who shook his head. 

“I don’t need to.” Lucien said, sounding calm. “I only need to keep it up long enough to kill you all.”

“And how likely is that?”

“Let’s find out.”

Elain looked at Cassian, wanting to know what he thought about what the Illyrian had said. Did he think they really had others coming to join them? Cassian was glaring upwards, his eyes following the Illyrian calling down to them. “Lucien…” 

“Mmm…?”

“Kill the bastard.”

Elain felt Lucien accept that request and then light flashed and arched toward the Illyrian, piercing him through the chest. Blood sprayed out and across the shield above them before the body fell, rolling off the side and out of sight. Elain knew that he would have fallen and landed on the pile of his fallen brethren outside the walls. Several more Illyrians took wing then, disappearing into the sky. 

“Can we manage this?” She asked, glancing at Azriel who stood beside her. The Shadowsinger’s eyes swept the shield above and then the shields by the doors. 

“Yes…” he replied. “If this is all… we could dispatch them without too much trouble. However, if that one spoke truth and more arrive, we will wish we had not lost the shield.” He looked down at her, “We could not leave them unprotected…” he nodded his head toward the females by the wall.

“What if we don’t lose the shield…” Elain glanced at the doors. “What if we slip out, get rid of any of them who remain, and keep the shield just in case…”

“That would require Lucien holding the shield while fighting…” Azriel looked amused, “Do you think he would be capable of that?”

“Well, I do.” She said, “But maybe you should ask him…”


	274. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Four

**Chapter 274**

“What do you think?” Cassian asked, eyes on Lucien. Elain watched her mate bite his lip a bit, his metallic eye clicking and whirring as he took in the shield above and the doors. 

“Can you do that?” Feyre asked him and he tilted his head. 

“And if I can’t?” he asked, returning his attention to Cassian and Azriel, “If I need to stay here to hold the shield, could you two handle it?”

“Yeah.” Cassian gave a cocky grin, “Az and I have had worse than this…” he nudged Azriel who nodded. “If a thousand more of the bastards show up, though…” his eyes went to Nesta and Elain noticed that her sister’s back had gone rigid. “Let’s just hope they don’t…”

“He was pretty confident.” Feyre said. 

“What else can we do?” Cassian countered, “We’re better off dealing with this now than waiting and having more of them in an hour…”

“Alright.” Lucien said, “If you pick a door…” he straightened his shoulders, “I’ll drop the shield for that door to let you out and I’ll put it back up behind you…” he looked from Cassian to Azriel, “I’ll hold it…”

“And if they need back in?” Nesta asked, her steely eyes on Lucien. 

“Same deal.” He told her, voice gentle.

Nesta nodded, her face a carefully constructed mask which Elain could not read. She could read her sister’s body language though, and it gave away Nesta’s anxiety over the plan. “What if Feyre and I help…”

Azriel looked away and Elain knew that he was not fond of the idea. Cassian shook his head, his eyes going from Azriel to Nesta. “Az and I have done this before.” He said, “We have a routine and know what one another will be doing. It will be easier if you leave it to us.”

“You’ve trained both of us.” Nesta pressed, “You know we could do it.”

“I don’t doubt that…” he gave her a placating smile, “But Az and I alone would be quicker…”

Nesta folded her arms. “Fine.” She said, her voice clipped, “But if you get yourself killed…”

“I shall expect a thorough arse-kicking from you.” He smiled more widely, and Elain saw Nesta relent a little. Her sister nodded, rearranging her folded arms. Cassian took a step toward Nesta, bending and pressing a quick kiss to her cheek before straightening again and walking toward the closest door. Azriel looked at each of them in turn and then followed Cassian, looking over his shoulder at Lucien. 

Elain followed her mate as he approached the door too. There were several Illyrians on the other side of the shield, preparing themselves once they realised that the shield was about to come down. Cassian and Azriel had drawn their wicked looking blades, and Elain tried to make herself breathe evenly, not wanting to let herself panic. The shield was about to vanish, and then it would all start again. Those Illyrians would be trying to get in here as Cassian and Azriel would be trying to get out. If any slipped past them… Elain shook her head. As if any of them would slip past Cassian and Azriel. They would be fine. 

“Ready?” Cassian asked, glancing at Lucien who nodded and rolled his shoulders, appearing to stretch. Elain tried not to smile as that look that told her he was concentrating hard crossed his face once more.

“On your mark…” Lucien said, voice soft, and his eyes followed Cassian move closer to the shield. Azriel shifted to join his friend by the shield, and Elain’s attention returned to the Illyrians on the other side of that shield, waiting with wide smirks. 

The only indication that Elain noticed that the shield went down was the brief flicker of light across the doorway, and then Cassian and Azriel surged forward, blades flashing as they swung, taking several of the other Illyrians by surprise. The moment they had crossed the doorway, Lucien threw the shield back up and they could do nothing but watch then as Cassian and Azriel cut their way up the hallway. 

“What are we expected to do now?” Nesta asked, her tone flat. “Sit and wait?”

“You can stand if you like.” Feyre replied, moving to sit on a nearby bench. Elain looked from Nesta to Feyre and then moved toward Lucien. 

“How do you feel remaining in here while they are out there?”

“Just fine.” He told her, looking down to meet her eyes as he brought one of his hands up to her cheek, “Hacking and slashing and getting covered in gore is not the only way to do my piece.” His fingers caressed her skin, “I’m protecting you… and your family… and everyone else in here.”

Elain smiled up at him, her own fingers moving over the buttons on his jacket. “Yes, you are.”

“Nowhere I would rather be, Petal.”


	275. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Five

**Chapter 275**

Nesta was becoming more and more antsy. Elain could just about feel the anxiety rolling off of her sister, and she was no daemati and there certainly wasn’t any mating bond connecting them, and yet the emotions pouring out of Nesta were as clear as day. Feyre had evidently sensed it too, because their youngest sister was watching Nesta from the corner of her eye while clearly trying to pretend that she wasn’t.

Nesta twisted her hands in her lap, her eyes on the shield and sky above them, and Elain just knew that her sister was watching for any sign of Cassian. Their friends had disappeared down the hallway outside the door through which they had exited, and they hadn’t been seen since. Elain supposed that they were busy fighting outside the training square, but she also knew that if it had have been Lucien out there, she would be just as worried as Nesta appeared to be. “They’ll be okay, Nes.” She said, hoping to reassure her elder sister. Those pale eyes turned her way, and Nesta attempted a small smile. 

“I’m sure you’re right.” Her tone suggested that Nesta was not at all sure of that. 

“Of course I am.” Elain sat beside Nesta. “I’m a Seer.”

“Have…” Nesta’s back straightened a little, “have you seen that?”

“I… no…” Elain admitted, tilting her head and reaching a hand out to lay atop Nesta’s still twisted hands. “I haven’t… but… you know them. They’re unstoppable.” The look that passed across Nesta’s face then told Elain that her sister was thinking back to when she and Cassian had been certain they’d both been about to die when Hybern had found them. Cassian hadn’t been unstoppable then, and in Nesta’s mind, that clearly meant that he wasn’t now. “Like he said, he and Azriel have done this kind of thing before. They’ll be just fine.”

“He should have let us help.” Nesta murmured, and Elain thought she might have been able to hear tears in her sister’s voice. She rubbed Nesta’s arm a little. 

“It will all be over soon.” She said, “You can tell him off for it then.”

“Trust me.” Nesta replied, “I will be.”

A scuffle by one of the other doors caught their attention then, and Lucien was the first to move across the room to take a better look. Azriel came striding up the small hallway, his blade moving around him, seemingly in and out of the light and shadows, too fast to follow. The Illyrians fell nonetheless, and before very long he had reached the shield, having cleared the hallway of anyone in his way. He gave a small smile to them, and then turned and went back the way he had come.

Cassian appeared in the next hallway, doing much the same thing. He was somewhat louder though, and far more showy in what he did and said. Elain could hear him taunting his opponents, and talking nearly all the while. By the time he had dispatched them and reached the shield, Nesta was on her feet and standing beside Elain as they had watched. Cassian’s eyes found Nesta and he smiled broadly at her. “Enjoying the show?” he asked, and Nesta folded her arms. 

“I’m rather bored, actually.” She replied, “Do you think you could move more quickly and be done with it?”

Cassian’s smile became pointier and he gave a mock bow to her. “As you wish.” He replied, turning on his heel and disappearing up the hallway again.

Elain smiled, watching Nesta’s reaction to that little interaction, but then a wave of exhaustion hit her and she sway a little. Nesta’s hand suddenly grabbed Elain’s elbow, steadying her. 

“Are you okay?” her sister asked, and Elain nodded. She’d just begun to wonder if she hadn’t ignored the earlier signs of exhaustion when she realised that it wasn’t hers, and she spun to see Lucien sinking onto one of the benches. 

“Lucien?” she asked, hurrying across to the bench her mate was sitting on, and sinking down beside him. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” He replied, eyes closed as he ran his fingers through his long ruby hair. 

Elain reached out, laying a hand on his shoulder. She could feel through the bond then, that he wasn’t. “It’s draining you, isn’t it?” she asked, dropping her voice to a whisper. “You’ve used what the others gave you, and now you’re using your own power to hold the shields…” Lucien opened his eyes to meet hers then, and she knew that she was correct. Taking his hands in hers, she held his eyes. “Take from me…”

“No…”

“Lucien…” she leaned into him. “I have plenty… please…” she pushed her desire to help him down the bond. “Let me…”

“Just a little, then.” He breathed, and Elain leaned into him, resting her forehead against her mate’s as she felt the bond pulse between them. She could feel that thread, as if attached to one of her ribs, and the cord she had wrapped around the both of them. He pulled on it a little, and Elain tried to open herself more fully, allowing him to draw what strength and power from her that he needed. She could feel his forehead, warm against hers, and she slid a hand up his arm to his shoulder. He drew from her for what felt like only seconds and then he stopped. 

“Was that enough?” she asked, and he nodded against her. Elain felt his hand in her hair and then he’d brought his lips to her forehead. 

“It was.”

Elain knew that those words might have been true, but that they likely wouldn’t be true for very long. She looked at him when he pulled back, and she was relieved to see him looking a little better. “If you need more…” she breathed, and he stroked her hair. 

“I can hold it for a little while.” He replied, and Elain tightened her grip on his hand. Hopefully, with Cassian and Azriel out there, he wouldn’t need to hold the shields for that much longer anyway.


	276. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Six

**Chapter 276**

The next time they spotted Cassian was when he ran across the shield above them. Elain barely had time to glance up before he’d thrown himself at another Illyrian and a vicious scuffle broke out. An instant later Nesta had hurried across the square, following beneath the fight as she watched as closely as possible. 

“He’s fine, Nesta.” Feyre sounded pretty sure of that, and Elain supposed that, of the lot of them, her younger sister had seen Cassian in action the most. She would know better than they would just what he was capable of, and what he could handle. Sure enough, moments later, Cassian dragged his blade through the Illyrian’s stomach, and they watched the body fall off the side of the building and disappear behind the walls. Without stopping, Cassian ran for the edge and leapt into the air. Elain lost sight of him as he descended, and she could only assume that he was heading down to continue the fight with Azriel. They could hear the sounds of fighting, metal on metal, and it sounded as if there was still quite a few of their enemy out there.

Lucien didn’t move from the bench he had been sitting on, and Elain knew that he was still beyond exhausted. She didn’t push it, however, knowing that he would prefer for her to think that he was not struggling. Smiling at him, Elain stroked her fingers over the back of his hand, allowing him that. 

She wondered what was going on outside when they heard a loud WHOOP, and then she closed her eyes as her ears began to ring.

_  
Elain found herself standing outside the training square, and it took her a moment to understand what it was that had happened. She knew that what she was seeing was current because there were Illyrians everywhere. Azriel was nearby, moving among them like smoke, forming and dissolving in shadows as he went from enemy to enemy, leaving red in his wake. She had been wondering what was going on out here and, somehow, she had tapped into her ability as a Seer to find out._

_Cassian moved in front of her then, calling out to a large Illyrian nearby who had been saying something Elain hadn’t paid much attention to but which Cassian had obviously taken offense to. Cassian charged toward the Illyrian who threw his blade up at the last moment, deflecting Cassian’s blow, and then they were going at it. Back and forth, they traded blows, both giving and taking ground as their battle went on and on._

_“You’ll see!” the words were snarled at Cassian who gave a laugh._

_“Oh? Will I?”_

_“When the others get here!”_

_Cassian punched him hard in the face, and Elain tried to stifle a gasp. It wouldn’t have mattered, she knew, if she had screamed. She wasn’t really there, and nobody would have heard her. She could have stripped down and run naked through their fight, and they still wouldn’t have seen her. “Your friends show up and we’ll do the same to them.” Cassian retorted and the Illyrian laughed, even holding his bloody nose._

_“You’ll all die.”_

_“Unlikely.” This was not Cassian, and Elain spun to look at the same time Cassian did._

_Rhys stood nearby, power moving around him, and Elain knew that he had just winnowed there. “About time you appeared.” Cassian said, although the irritation in his voice was clearly fabricated. “Az and I have been getting tired.”_

_“Speak for yourself.” Azriel put in, shifting to stand beside Cassian._

_“It looks like you’ve taken care of the lot of them.” Rhys sounded casual, almost bored._

_“For now.” Cassian wiped his blade before sheathing it. “They’ve sent for others. We could be overrun at any moment.”_

_“That wont happen.” Rhys strode forward and Elain let herself look around them. There were, as she had suspected, a huge mountain of dead Illyrians who had fallen from the roof when Lucien had been ripping through them with his shield weapon. There had to be hundreds of them._

_“And why not?” Cassian asked the High Lord of the Night Court and Rhys smiled._

_“Because,” Rhys said, “I made sure that the other camps were all very much aware of what would happen to them, and how displeased the High Lord would be, if they had gotten involved in this._

_“Ahh…” Cassian ran a hand through his tangled hair. “That’d just about do it.”_

_Rhys smiled at them again. “Where is my mate?”_

_“Inside.” Cassian tipped his head at the square. “With the others.”  
_

Elain was physically jolted back to where she sat on the bench beside Lucien. He was looking at her with concern, one of his hands sliding up and down her forearm soothingly. “Petal?” he breathed, “What is it?”

“Rhys is here.” She told him, and Feyre got to her feet nearby, moving closer to listen. “He’s outside with Cassian and Azriel…”

“What a relief.” Nesta murmured, and Elain nodded. 

“He made sure that there will be no others coming to join the attack…” Elain looked from Lucien to her elder sister and then to Feyre. “It’s over.”


	277. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Seven

**Chapter 277**

“Drop the shield.” Feyre repeated, and Lucien shook his head. The High Lady of the Night Court folded her arms, straightened her shoulders and looked up into Lucien’s face. Elain was sure she hadn’t imagined the temperature around them drop and become icy as her sister’s expression hardened. “Lucien…” Feyre just about hissed, “Drop the shield so that I can go to my mate.”

For his part, Lucien looked down his nose at Feyre who was still short in comparison to his impressive stature, despite the power emanating from her. Elain was rather impressed with Lucien’s nerve, and she just watched silently as her mate shook his head again. “There could be any number of those Illyrians still out there and waiting for a way in…” he gestured at the hallway through which Cassian and Azriel had exited not long before. “When they come back with Rhys, and we can see them, then I’ll drop the shield to let them in.”

Feyre’s face twisted, and Elain grew uncomfortable with the way that her sister was looking at her mate. She didn’t like the fact that Lucien was the only one standing between The High Lady of the Night Court and her mate. Having felt the savage jealousy and unreasonable reactions when something or someone got between herself and her mate, Elain began inching forward, wanting to put herself between her sister and Lucien. She had no idea what Feyre might do, but she knew that Lucien wouldn’t enjoy it.

“Lucien…” Feyre ground out through clenched teeth, and there was no mistaking the threat in her voice, “You-”

“He’s right.” Elain cut in, pushing between them, “He’s right, and we should wai-” she broke off, her voice choking in her throat when Feyre’s cold eyes turned on her. Elain stepped back, into Lucien’s chest, and his warm hands suddenly on her waist helped to calm her just a little. Feyre looked livid. Elain couldn’t blame her, she knew that if she had been kept from her mate, especially after the day they had been having, that she would have just about lost her mind. Still, she didn’t’ know how long it would be before Feyre snapped.

It seemed as if Lucien had been thinking the same thing, because he tried to pull Elain around behind himself, but she refused to move, keeping herself between them. Nesta appeared then, pushing herself in front of Elain to meet Feyre face to face. Without even being able to see Nesta’s face, Elain knew which expression would be there. She just knew that her elder sister’s chin was lifted and she was presenting that cold superior air that she had used to put forward all the time. “We do not need to bicker amongst ourselves.” Nesta said, and her tone left no room for argument. 

Elain allowed Lucien to draw her back away from her sisters, and she knew that he was concerned that they might fall into a brawl at any moment. She wasn’t exactly certain that they wouldn’t herself. 

“My mate is out there…” Feyre’s voice was flat. 

“Deal with it.” Nesta’s voice was cold. 

Elain shook her head, not knowing what to do as her sisters faced one another. She watched Nesta staring at Feyre, and she could understand her sister’s thoughts. Nesta had been anxious over Cassian being outside the shield for a while now, so it stood to reason that she would expect Feyre to be able to handle that very same thing, especially considering the fact that it appeared the fighting was over. 

That look on Feyre’s face, though…

“Just wait.” Lucien said, moving around Elain and approaching her sisters with his hands held up before himself. “Neither of you wants to fight. This is all over. We’re just waiting on the others to come back…”

“I don’t want to hear a thing from you.” Feyre snapped at him, “Unless it’s you dropping that shield.”

“Too bad.” Lucien replied, a touch of fire in his own voice. “I am not putting my mate at risk, let along both of you and everyone else in here because you want to see Rhysand two minutes earlier than you would once he gets here and we can be sure the threat has been eliminated.”

Feyre actually snarled then, and Elain took a startled step backwards. Lucien slipped in front of her, cutting off her sight of her sister, but then they all froze as they heard Cassian’s laugh echoing up the hallway. Nesta brushed past them on her way to the door, clearly trying to get a look down it, and then turning to look at Lucien expectantly.


	278. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Eight

**Chapter 278**

It was a relief when Lucien was finally able to let the shield fall. He felt that relief throughout his entire body, and he would have liked nothing more than to sink down into a nice comfortable bed and stay there for an entire day. Elain’s hands were on his arm then, and she was leading him to sit down onto a bench. He went with her without protest, barely noticing Feyre hurry toward Rhysand when he walked into the training square with Cassian and Azriel. 

Feyre flung herself at her mate, and Lucien watched as Rhysand lifted her from the ground, holding her close to himself. The High Lord of the Night Court must have been supremely worried, Lucien figured. He’d known that they had been under threat from a horde of pissed off Illyrians, and Rhysand was acutely aware of what kinds of things pissed off Illyrians were capable of. Lucien had no doubt that any number of disturbing things and images had gone through the High Lord’s mind while he’d been unable to be with his mate. 

He was eternally thankful that he had been able to be with his own mate during it all. As if sensing that thought, Elain slid her hand into his and he squeezed it gently. His heart beat just a little quicker when she leaned against his side, her warm hair coming to rest against his throat. Lucien had no idea if he would be able to handle being kept from Elain while she was under attack and he was unable to get to her. He had no idea what he would do. He suspected he might lose his head altogether and throw himself straight into the mix in a furious attempt to get to her and wind up getting himself killed instead. Turning his body just a little, Lucien wrapped an arm around Elain’s waist. He hoped he never had to find out. 

“Are you alright?” Elain’s gentle voice pulled Lucien from his musings and he nodded, holding her a little closer. She snuggled into him a bit and he smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “How do you feel?”

“I’m okay, Petal.” He murmured. “I’ll sleep well tonight, that’s all…”

“Not too early, I hope.” Her response was whispered, but Lucien could hear the smile behind it, and he well and truly got her intended meaning. 

“I think I can say awake for a little while…” 

Elain settled against him, and they both watched as Nesta checked Cassian over for any wounds or injuries while pretending that was not what she was doing. The look on Cassian’s face told them that he knew entirely too well that was exactly what she was doing. Lucien found himself wondering how long it was going to be before Nesta gave up all pretence that she was in love with Cassian. They all knew it, and he rather thought that the only thing keeping her from openly admitting it was her stubbornness. He had thought back in Autumn after she had gone off with Cassian for Mabon that she had moved past the denial, but still she had kept it up. Perhaps, he thought after a moment, this was how they liked to play with one another. Perhaps it was a flirtation. Watching Cassian’s face then as the Illyrian allowed Nesta to look him over, Lucien thought that perhaps he was right. 

When Feyre and Rhysand sat down nearby, Lucien forced himself to stop watching Nesta and Cassian. He glanced briefly at Feyre to see if she was still angry with him, but all trace of previous tension had left her face. 

“So you were being useful after all?” Lucien asked, his eyes on Rhysand who raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Whatever do you mean, Lucien?”

“Well…” Lucien have a vulpine grin, “We knew that Feyre had let you know what was going on and we were all expecting you to show up and help out…”

“Ah…” Rhys nodded, tilting his head as he met Lucien’s eyes. 

“Seems you did, just not in the way we expected.”

“I’m funny that way.” Rhys’ teeth flashed as he smiled. “Figured I’d trust Cass and Az to take care of things here while I took care of the rest…” Those violet eyes flickered over Lucien. “Didn’t expect to see a shield like that when I got here, though…”

“Didn’t expect to be making one.”

“How interesting.” Rhys smiled again, “You’ll want to let Helion know about that bit of magic…”

Nodding, Lucien made a mental note to ask the High Lord of the Day Court about it. He was sure that his father would have some insights. 

“Before we get there…” Elain put in. “How are we going to help clean up what is outside…?”


	279. Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy-Nine

**Chapter 279**

Rhys had tried to get the Illyrian females to return to their homes so that they could rest while the rest of them took care of cleaning the place up, but they had refused to do so. The one that Elain recognised as the female who ran the clothing shop had come to tell Rhys that respectfully, they would rather do their part and be useful in the clean-up. Rhys had replied that it was not necessary, but she had insisted, and the large group of females had stood nearby, not going anywhere. After a few moments, he had relented and he had begun then handing out different roles and jobs that needed to be done. 

Watching them, Elain understood why they had wanted to be a part of it. They had decided to step up and begin training because they wanted to learn how to defend themselves and their home. They had tried to fight, before being sheltered in the square, and now they wanted to help clean up what had happened. By doing this, they were a part of every single thing that had happened here. If the time came where something like this would happen again, they would be able to face it with the knowledge that they had done it before. Perhaps next time they would not have to rely on anyone else. This would make them stronger. Elain respected them for that choice. 

Some of them, Rhys had tasked with helping to gather the bodies of the dead, and pile them in several places within the common open field nearby. This was where the pyres would be lit. There were too many to bury. Elain watched this happen for a time, before shifting her gaze on. Some of the others had been asked to help collect wood for the pyres, and this seemed to be a slow process. She supposed because one didn’t often walk into the trees and come across perfectly useable firewood. Some of it had to be cut and then carried to the appropriate places. Others yet were busy scrubbing the walls and trying to wash the blood from everywhere. It had not been a tidy process, protecting them all, and half the square was bathed in blood. As the heat of the sun baked it all, a scent that had begun to turn Elain’s stomach had permeated the air. 

When her stomach had twisted and then begun to rumble, Elain’s thoughts turned toward the evening meal. They would all be hungry after what had taken place earlier, and then all the work of cleaning it up. Heading for Rhys, Elain explained her thoughts. 

“Nobody will have had time to make dinner…” she said, “They’ll all be hungry.”

“Ah…” The look he gave her told Elain that he hadn’t at all considered what she had mentioned. “You’re right, of course.” Rhys nodded then, looking up and around at everyone going about their tasks, “What were you thinking?” he asked her, those violet eyes returning to Elain to meet her gaze. “A dinner for everyone all together?”

“I…” Elain paused, she didn’t know what she had been thinking, but she supposed it was probably something like that. “I guess so… is that possible?”

“I should think so.” He tilted his head, “I’ll send word to Cerridwen and Nuala.” He nodded again, “See if they can organise food to be brought from Velaris.”

“Where do you want it?” Elain glanced around, “In the training square?”

“I think they’ve probably all spent enough time there for today, don’t you?”

“I suppose so…” Elain thought again. “If we had the tables, we could do it in the main street…”

“Tables can be collected.” Rhys replied, “I’ll get Azriel on it.”

“I…” Elain bit her lip; she hadn’t meant to create extra work for those who had already done so much today. 

“It’s okay.” Rhys was watching her. “It’s good you thought of this.” He told her, “Else everyone would be going hungry come evening. You just tell others what you need, and they’ll see to it. You’re in charge.”

“Alright…” Elain turned to look back down into the town, thinking about what else they would need. Her mind began to race as she considered plates and cutlery, they would need glasses and serving dishes. “Okay…” she began to move, hardly noticing Rhys return to what he had been doing behind her as she walked. She knew that she should find whoever it was that owned the pub, as they would likely have enough of what they would need. 

It wasn’t long before she noticed Azriel bringing tables from somewhere into the street, and then she saw Feyre attempting to locate chairs and bring them out to the tables. Elain and the Illyrian who ran the pub began carrying stacks of plates and dishes full of cutlery out and then another female appeared with a few tablecloths. Before Elain knew it, bits and pieces were coming from everywhere as it seemed that everyone had something to contribute. Perhaps, she thought, this might be a pleasant way to end the day. 

When the first tendrils of smoke rose up from behind the training square, she knew that the first pyre had been lit, and Elain was thankful that the wind was blowing that smoke up the mountain instead of down into the town. She looked the other way, taking in the way the breeze moved through the wildflowers that grew on the edge of town. They were pretty, and a stark contrast to much of what they had seen today, and this made her pause to consider. 

Figuring then, that she would be able to find a few glass jars or bottles to serve as little vases, Elain grabbed a nearby basket and headed off into the nearby fields to collect some wildflowers for their tables. Some table decoration could only serve to further lift their spirits after what they had gone through and, if nothing else, the light floral scent of the flowers would be nice in comparison to the bodies and smoke that most of them would have been breathing in all afternoon.


	280. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty

**Chapter 280**

The sun was setting and the smoke from the pyres was curling through the air, casting a strange glow over the town by the time Elain returned with a basket full of flowers. The street was pretty much empty, and Elain paused by the tables, her eyes on the oranges and purples above. She realised that it would be getting dark soon, and wished that she’d thought of that before.

“You had me getting worried, Petal.”

Elain turned, smiling as Lucien strode toward her. She watched the sunset play off of him, golden light turning his hair molten. “Did I?”

He reached her then, one of his hands brushing her hair back from her face. “Everyone else has gone to bathe and change before the meal…”

“Ah…” Elain eyed the glass jars and vases arranged equidistantly along the table, water already in them. She wondered who had realised what she had gone to do and put them out for her. “Well, as soon as I get these into water, I shall do the same.”

Lucien bent and slipped his elbow through the basket’s handle, lifting it from Elain’s arm and she let him take it. “I’ll help you…” he told her, giving her one of his well-practised courtly smiles. Elain smiled back at him, taking a few of the flowers from the basket and moving toward the table. She began arranging what she had collected into the jars and vases as she and Lucien moved up the table. The darkness continued to fall and Elain looked up and around. 

“We won’t be able to see before long…”

Lucien followed where she was looking and Elain smiled as several small balls of faelight appeared, twinkling and hovering above the table. “Is that better?” he asked, and she nodded, slipping one of her hands into her mate’s. 

“That’s lovely.” She replied, smiling at him again as she reached for some more flowers from the basket. They continued moving up the table until Elain had used all of her flowers and put some in all of the jars and vases. Just as they were finishing up, Cerridwen and Nuala came out into the street, holding several trays and dishes and Elain smiled, pleased to see them. She supposed that Rhys had been successful in contacting them for some food from Velaris. 

“We will set this all out.” Nuala said, smiling as she met Elain’s eyes. “You should go and change.” Elain glanced down at herself, frowning as she noticed the splatters of blood from earlier in the day. 

“Ah…” she nodded, “Thank you, I will.” 

Lucien slid an arm around her shoulders and steered her up the hill toward the cabin they had been staying in with Feyre. 

“You hadn’t even noticed, had you?” he asked, and Elain knew that he was referring to her dress and the blood. She shook her head. 

“Are you feeling better?” she asked, glancing at him as they walked and he gave her a small smile. 

“Still tired, but I’ll survive.”

“Do you want to stay here tonight?” she asked, and he looked at her again. “Or go back to Rhys’ house?”

“Which would you prefer?”

“I would like to leave…” she said, “Once we’re back in the Town House, it will be easier to get back to the Day Court… and we can just… relax.” She let out a sigh, feeling weariness come over her. They had been travelling and moving for so long, and she really did just long for an extended period of time where they could just be in a place together and put together some semblance of what their lives would be together. Hopefully, with nobody else trying to kill them.

“We can do that, Petal.” He said, “I’m assuming Rhys will be returning after dinner, along with Cerridwen and Nuala…”

“Good.” Elain resisted a yawn as they reached the cabin and went inside. 

It was only twenty minutes later that she was heading back down the hill with Lucien, Feyre and Rhys. They had all bathed and changed and Elain could hear her stomach rumbling as they approached the table. Lucien’s faelights were still twinkling in the darkness, casting a shifting glow across the tables and the faces of those who had already claimed seats. The food smelled delicious, and she could see the appreciative faces of several of the Illyrian females who were seated nearby. Elain let Lucien lead her to a chair which he pulled out for her and she took her seat between her mate and her younger sister. This was nice, despite the day they’d had. Elain had to admit that. She was, however, just bout counting down the minutes until they would be able to pack up and return to the Town House and escape it all. No mount of bouquets on the table or twining faelights could make her forget what she had seen in this place.


	281. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-One

**Chapter 281**

It was a struggle for Lucien to keep his eyes open. He was thoroughly exhausted, beyond anything he could actually remember. He’d been pretty damn exhausted when he had fled the Autumn Court all those years ago, his brothers stalking him as he’d tried to get away. If Tamlin hadn’t found him, Lucien was pretty sure that he would have ended up collapsing and then he would have been dead. This was worse. Not in any way that threatened his life, although he would fully acknowledge that if he hadn’t been able to hold the shield he would have been killed, as would everyone else. 

Turning his head to look at Elain, Lucien watched her pick up a small piece of bread and take a bite. She was listening to something Rhys was saying, and he took a moment to just watch his mate. She was safe now. He had kept her safe, and he knew that it had been his need to do that which had forced him to hold that shield. She had asked him to protect her. The memory flashed quickly through his mind and Lucien narrowed his eyes as he looked at her. He knew that she had done that deliberately, to focus him and to calm him down. Elain turned her head then, meeting his eyes and smiling at him and Lucien knew that she was well aware of what he had just thought.

“Conniving mate.” He purred and her smile grew even wider. 

“You love me.” She replied, her hand sliding into his beneath the table. He squeezed her hand a little and nodded. 

“I do.” He said.

“You needed a focus.”

“I did.” He agreed. “Though, I would have done that anyway.”

“Yes…” Elain leaned into him, her face tilted upward toward him, and Lucien bent his head to press a kiss to her lips. He felt her smile into the kiss, and he did the same. That smile grew even wider when he lifted his head and saw the moment that Elain realised that half the table was watching them. She blushed then, like she always had whenever someone had seen them do something like that. He liked that she hadn’t lost that reaction. It was endearing and he tightened his grip on her hand as she looked back down at the table.

When the others around them returned their own attention to their previous conversations, Lucien leaned into Elain once more, bringing his lips to her ear. “Thank you.” He breathed, pressing a kiss to her ear and causing her to shudder a little. “For sharing your energy with me earlier. I wouldn’t have been able to keep the shield up without that.”

She turned her head and smiled gently at him. She didn’t say anything and didn’t move, but Lucien saw down the bond. He saw her reach a hand out and stroke his cheek with her fingers, following his scar as she looked at him. He blinked and the vision vanished and Elain was still smiling at him. Wondering when she had figured out how to do that, he smiled back at her, watching as she looked back to her plate and picked up her fork.

The wind changed direction then, and a moment later the smell of smoke hit them. Heads turned to look up the hill and, even in the moonlight, Lucien could see that the huge plumes of smoke were being lifted and brought toward them. 

“Oh, no…” Elain breathed, and she looked at Rhys. “Maybe it would have been better to bury them.” She said, “It would have been a lot of work to dig pits big enough for them all, but then the smoke wouldn’t have been all anyone would be breathing for days…”

“We don’t bury our dead.” Rhys replied, and Lucien saw Elain tilt her head. The High Lord of the Night Court looked at her and went on. “The Illyrians are of the air not the earth.” He told her, “When Illyrians die, they are returned to the air…” he gestured at the sky and the smoke, “It would be unthinkable to throw them under the cold damp dirt… even if they were a bunch of bastards.”

Lucien thought then about what he had seen after Hybern had been killed and they had returned to their camps. As the killing fields had been cleared, the Illyrians had gathered all of their dead and heaped them on pyres. He glanced at Elain, wondering if she had seen the same thing, but this had been right after her father had died, and he supposed that she hadn’t seen a thing while trapped within that pain.

“I…” Elain picked up her cup, swirling the liquid within. “I hadn’t thought of it like that.” Rhys smiled and nodded. 

“It may smell for a few days,” he said, leaning back in his hair, “But it’s also a good warning for anyone else looking this way. This village is not unprotected.”

Elain’s back stiffened at those words, and Lucien knew exactly where her mind had gone because his went to the same place. “And the other camps?” he asked, “Other villages?”

“Mm.” Rhys nodded, spearing a piece of meat with his fork. “Likely their males all haven’t up and left and they have some protection of their own, but Cassian will do the rounds and check tomorrow.”

Elain relaxed visibly at that and Lucien ran a hand over her back, rubbing soothingly. It would have been horrible news indeed if they had returned home only to later hear that other camps and villages had been attacked after they had gone through so much to defend this one. Rhys might have been acting as if this were a simple problem, and one that wasn’t much worth worrying about, but Lucien knew that it was an act the High Lord of the Night Court was putting on. He was so very good at playing games, and Lucien could see that this was one of them. It might have been for Elain, to put her at ease, or the other Illyrians around the table, but it was an act all the same. It was clear to Lucien that this was not something that Rhysand was going to tolerate. Anyone who thought to try and take advantage of others like those who lived here was going to regret pissing off the High Lord of the Night Court.


	282. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Two

**Chapter 282**

The Town House smelled as it always had, and Elain felt herself relax as they walked through the doors. This place was safe, she knew that, she could feel it in her bones. Not once had she ever felt threatened or frightened here, and she hadn’t realised how much she needed that until they had gotten back. She was tired, she realised. Not just from the long day, but a greater tiredness. It was one that went deep within her, and couldn’t be cured by a good night’s rest.

Feyre headed for the kitchen and Elain followed her, going for the kettle and setting it to boil. Then, leaning back against the kitchen bench, Elain let out a long breath, releasing much of the tension she had been holding within herself. Feyre looked at her, holding several mugs she had just taken from the cupboard and Elain met her sister’s eyes. A flash of red by the door drew her eye and she found Lucien standing there, half in the kitchen and half in the hallway. His metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked between Elain and her sister and then he shifted his weight from foot to foot. 

“Ah…” he breathed, “if you don’t need me… I might go wash… again.” He made a face, “I stink of smoke…”

Nodding, Elain realised that she did, too. She could smell the pyres all over herself. She would have to wash her hair before she got into bed. “That’s okay…” she gave him a smile, “I’ll do the same when I head up…” Lucien nodded and turned, pausing when Elain spoke again. “Do you want tea?”

“Sure, Petal.” He said, “That would be lovely.”

Elain took a few mugs from Feyre, setting them along the bench by the kettle while her sister took a few more from the cupboard. They both then stood in silence as they waited for the kettle to boil. She could tell that Feyre was watching her, but she didn’t know why. Twisting her hands together, Elain tried to wait for her sister to say something but after several moments in which Feyre did nothing but watch her, she sighed. 

“Is there something you want to say?” Elain asked, meeting Feyre’s pale eyes, lifting her chin slightly. “Something you’d like to ask?”

“Not sure.” Feyre said, leaning back against the cupboard as the kettle went off. Elain turned and poured the hot water into a pot and the waiting tea. She let it sit for a moment to steep, looking back at her sister. “I was kind of wondering the same thing about you.”

“Were you?” Elain asked. 

Feyre folded her arms, narrowing her eyes. “I have known you my whole life…” her younger sister made a face. “and you seem… I’m not even sure how to describe it.”

“Ah…” Elain turned and began pouring tea into the mugs. She then turned and passed one to Feyre who took it carefully. Picking up her own mug, Elain cradled it in her hands, leaning back against the bench. 

“Is there anything wrong?” Feyre asked, and Elain shook her head. 

“I’m just tired…”

“It seems more than that.”

“It is…” Elain nodded, “but it’s still just weariness.” She gave her sister a small smile, “I want to go home.”

“Go home…” Feyre echoed, and Elain nodded.

“I want to go back to the Day Court.” She said, stifling a yawn. “I’ve had enough travel and excitement for now. I’d like to just rest and get my garden sorted, tend it…”

“And you want to do that in the Day Court…?”

Elain nodded, meeting her sister’s eyes. She had told Feyre and Nesta this. They knew that she had planned to make her life there with Lucien. Feyre was nodding then, and Elain knew that her sister had understood her thoughts. “I do…”

“It’s… different.” Feyre said, lifting her mug to take a light sip. “To hear you say it… but then to see you want it after a day like today.”

“Did you not think I meant it?” Elain asked, “After what happened when you and the other High Lords visited the Day Court and I told you that I was staying?”

Feyre took another sip of her tea, her eyes sweeping over Elain again and again. “You asked me,” her sister began, “before you even first went to the Spring Court with Lucien. You asked me when he first returned if I thought that you should get to know him…”

“And you said he was a good male.” Elain recalled. 

Feyre grinned at her. “Are you glad you got to know him now?”

Blinking slowly at her sister, Elain nodded. “Obviously I am.” Feyre’s smirk just grew wider.

“You’re sure.” Feyre said, “Of what you want and where you want to make your life…”

“Yes.”

“Will you leave in the morning?”

“I think so.” Elain took a sip of her own tea, then turned to check on the other mugs. “Rhys was wanting some of this, wasn’t he?”

“Yes, I’ll take it to him in his library…” Feyre came forward, and Elain shifted aside to allow her sister to pick the mug up. “I’ll see you in the morning for breakfast before you leave.”

“Goodnight.” Elain picked up the other mug and made for the door. Feyre disappeared into the library, and she went up the stairs. As she moved step by step, Elain figured that Lucien probably wasn’t done in the bath yet, but at least the tea would be waiting for him when he got out.

Pausing at the top of the stairs as she looked down the hallway, Elain wondered for a moment if he’d gone to his old room or to hers. She closed her eyes and reached for the bond, trying to feel him as she listened for that heartbeat she knew so well. It was instantly apparent to her that he had gone to her room, and she moved swiftly down the hallway and pushed open the door. 

Lucien had brought both of their packs up and they sat now on her bed. Elain set the mugs of tea on the bedside tables before she went to unbuckle her pack and pull out the nightgown she was currently using and her hairbrush. She would have to wash the smoke from herself, too. As she moved to the vanity and took a seat, Elain reached up to upbraid her hair. As it fell about her face, she noticed that she did indeed smell like smoke as did her hair. She would need to wash it. Picking up her hairbrush, Elain set about carefully brushing her hair as she waited for Lucien to come back out from the bathroom.


	283. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Three

**Chapter 283**

Squeezing her hair in a towel, Elain stepped back into the bedroom, her eyes landing upon her glorious mate. Smiling, she let her eyes move over him slowly, enjoying the sight entirely. Lucien was sitting on the bed, propped up against several pillows against the headboard. He wore a loose white shirt that was unlaced and his bare legs were spread out across the bed before him. His long red hair hung vibrant and unbound about his shoulders, and he held a book in one hand and his mug of tea in the other. That metallic eye clicked and whirred as he looked up to see her appreciating him, and he flashed her one of his charming courtly smiles. 

“All clean, Petal?” his voice was just about a purr and Elain felt heat flush through her body almost instantly. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other as that heat continued to move through her and down between her thighs. Lucien’s smile turned vulpine, and she knew by the way that he lifted his chin that he could smell it. “Ah…” he said, setting his mug and book aside, “Not anymore…” he sat up a little more, turning toward her, “and… you’d just dried yourself off, too…”

Elain felt herself blush at those words and she chucked the towel in her hand at him. “Oh, shh…”

“Now, now…” he smiled charmingly again, “You don’t want to start a war. We’ve had enough of that for today.” He flicked the wet towel onto a nearby chair, his eyes never leaving her.

“Oh, was it only today…” She staggered slowly toward the bed, and Lucien scooted out of the way to make room for her. 

“It was…” He slid an arm around her, pulling her in and tucking her to his side. “But we get to go home tomorrow…”

“That sounds wonderful.” Elain tucked her head up under her mate’s chin, enjoying the way he seemed to fold around her. Her blood was hot in her veins and she tried to remain very still so that she wouldn’t find her hands moving over him. She knew how tired he was, she had been able to feel that since he’d been struggling with the shield. He needed rest, and she wanted him to have it. 

Reaching down, Elain pulled the covers up over them. She felt Lucien shift a little, allowing her to lay more completely against him, and Elain couldn’t help the shudder than ran through her at the feel of his hot firm body pressed up against her. He gave a low chuckle then, and his fingers moved through her damp hair, tightening a little and pulling her head back so that he could look down and meet her eyes. Elain gazed up at him, heat flaring within her. 

“What is it that you want, my love?” he asked, voice low.

 _Want_ coursed through Elain, and she shook her head. He was tired, and she knew that they should go to sleep. Running a hand up his chest, she looked at the shirt he wore in the faint light, and she frowned. “This is between me and your skin…” she murmured, and Lucien gave a soft laugh, before pulling the offending shirt off and dropping it to the carpet beside the bed. 

“I could say the same thing…” his fingers plucked at the nightgown she wore and she smiled up at him, holding his eyes as his hands moved to the straps at her shoulders before they pulled the thing from her. She watched it follow the shirt to the floor and then her mate’s arms were around her again, pulling her flush against himself. This was much better, she thought. Lucien’s skin was hot and comforting, and she couldn’t help running her hands over him. 

She had thought they might die today, and the fact that she got to lay here with him now, nothing between them, brought her some much needed peace. She traced her fingers down his chest and over his abdomen, listening to his heartbeat, thankful that she still got to hear it, that she still got to have him. 

“Are you thinking about today?” he asked, and she nodded, her cheek against his warm chest. 

“Yes…”

“Don’t.” he breathed, one of his large hands smoothing down her back, fingers following her spine. “It’s over. It’s in the past… It doesn’t do to dwell on memories like that.”

“But you were so very magnificent…” she told him, smiling when she felt his reaction to that. “Shining with all that light and power… It was very impressive.”

“I’m glad you found something to appreciate in that…”

“I did.” Elain tilted her head to press her lips to his jaw. “And I know that you’re very tired…” she tucked her head up under his chin again, her body resting almost atop his. “So, let us take some rest…” She felt Lucien draw a deep breath then, and his hand paused its stroking of her back. She looked up, wondering what had happened and she met his eyes as he gazed at her. “Wha-” she had been about to ask him why he had stopped when he bent his head to press his lips to hers, and Elain didn’t hesitate to kiss him back. 

Heat flooded her once again and she had parted her lips for Lucien within seconds, groaning gently when he took complete advantage of that. His hands tightened on her, and she couldn’t help half rubbing against him. She tried not to, still aware in the back of her mind that he was tired, but her body seemed to have a mind of its own. Lucien pulled her more firmly against himself in response, and Elain groaned again, aware that her own heart was racing now.

“Is this what you wanted, Petal?”


	284. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Four

**Chapter 284**

“You’re exhausted…” Elain breathed, her breath then catching in her throat when Lucien’s hand slid from her ribs down over her stomach.

“Mmm…” his lips ghosted across her cheek, and Elain gasped when his hand slid lower, his long fingers caressing her inner thigh. 

“Oh…” she turned a little toward him and Lucien slid his left arm under her shoulders. She lifted her own left hand to take his in hers, pinned by her head, and he held her there as he hooked his right leg through hers and pulled it wider. His fingers went from one thigh to the other and Elain tried to turn toward him a little more, but his hand held hers in place and she couldn’t lift herself enough to move. He held her restrained there, she realised. Held her open and in place, where he could do anything he liked with that hand still slowly tracing the sensitive skin of her thighs. “Lucien…”

“Yes, Petal…” his fingers traced up one thigh and then higher, moving across her lower abdomen before going back down to the other thigh. Elain drew a shuddery breath, knowing that he was teasing her deliberately. He met her eyes in the dim light then, and she held his gaze as his fingers began tracing back up once more. 

“You… you’re exhausted…” she managed to get the words out. “You should be resting…”

His hand moved to cup her and she gasped, taking in his bright flash of a smile. “I can do this.” He whispered, “Do you think I would just drift off to sleep and leave my mate all hot an unsatisfied?”

“You… you’re the one making me… hot…” Elain could barely pant the words out, her hips lifting from the mattress, trying to increase contact with her mate’s hand as he gently caressed her. He smiled again. 

“And I’m the one who can do something about it…”

She gave a small whine, the sound being cut off when Lucien kissed her, his hand rubbing at her more rhythmically now. Her right hand slid into his hair, gripping tightly, when his fingers stroked over her, through slick desire, and what seemed like flashes of lightning arched through her body. Elain’s hips lifted again, searching for those fingers, wanting more of them and, when Lucien eventually pushed them inside of her, she gave a wanton cry, tugging more tightly on his hair. 

Lucien had turned, still holding Elain wrapped in his left arm, but he positioned himself beside her, half leaning over her to give himself better access to what he was doing. Elain’s hand left his hair and she clutched instead at his shoulder as he worked those fingers inside of her. She knew that he was watching her, could feel his gaze upon her face, even with her eyes closed. She could feel his delight and his reaction to every expression and accompanying sound she made. “A-Aah…” She couldn’t keep her hips still, and they lifted and rolled, and it was hard for her to draw a breath around the sounds coming out of her and gasps her mate was eliciting. 

“This is what you wanted, isn’t it, my love?” his voice was soft, and Elain knew that he was still watching her face, taking in every movement, every hitch of breath, and she nodded, her hand still clutching at his shoulder. 

“I want you…” 

“You have me.” He replied, “You’ll always have me…”

Elain nodded again, the visions of their future she had previously seen flashing through her memory. She knew they hadn’t changed, and that what she had seen still awaited them. “Always …” she murmured, unable to help sinking her fingernails into Lucien’s skin. She knew that he had felt her body grow taut, and her hips began to move more quickly as if trying to ride his fingers. Lucien gave a low chuckle, continuing exactly what he was doing, and she knew that he was aware that it was exactly right. She gasped again, almost unable to draw any air at all, and then she shrieked her release, her back arching as she clutched at her mate who continued to hold her to himself, and he didn’t move until she lay shuddering in his arms trying to catch her breath and breathe more slowly. 

When he pressed gently lips to her forehead, Elain smiled, wrapping herself around her mate and settling against him. “Now we can rest…” he murmured, and she looked up at him. 

“Don’t you want me to…” she slid a hand over his hip, but he shook his head, kissing her forehead again and tightening his arms around her. 

“Witnessing that was enough for me.” She could hear the smirk in his voice, but also the weariness, “Maybe in the morning…”

“Alright…” Elain settled against him, thinking about all the ways in which she could wake her mate up in the morning. Biting her lip, she closed her eyes and began sorting through her options. Lucien usually slept on his back, so she figured it would be easily enough to straddle him before he awoke. She smiled then, trying to decide if she would use her hand or her mouth.


	285. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Five

**Chapter 285**

Lucien was warm and comfortable. He was happy and felt as if he were floating in the clouds. Softness moved over him, caressing him and he smiled. A pleasant weight enveloped him and he opened his eyes. The sun was shining and it was definitely morning. The blanket rose up above him a bit and then Lucien realised that Elain was beneath it, kneeling over him. Gingerly, he lifted the blanket so that he could look beneath it and see her and was met with her smiling face, her golden brown hair a mess about that perfect face, and he couldn’t help but smile in return. 

“Petal…” 

“You’re awake…” she purred, and Lucien’s heart leaped into his throat when she carefully dragged her nails down his chest. “Good… I was waiting…”

“Waiting?” he asked, “For me to wake up?”

Her smile grew a little wicked, and he thought his heart might stop altogether. He remembered then that she could hear it, and then her wicked smile grew even wider when she read that realisation in him. “Couldn’t start until you were awake…” she said softly, and he wanted to ask her what she was going to start, but he just couldn’t make the words come out. Elain blinked, her eyes on his face and he figured she must have misunderstood his silence as confusion for why she had waited because she shook her head. “I… I wouldn’t do… if you were asleep… you might not want…” she broke off and he felt a wave of uncertainty from her. 

Lucien quickly slipped a hand beneath the blanket to Elain’s cheek, bringing her eyes back up to meet his. “I’m certain, Petal, that I will very much want whatever it is you were going to do…”

He watched as she blinked, her eyes flicking back and forth across his face and then she smiled, taking his words to heart. “I’m certain that you will.” She said, and he reached for her down the bond, trying to do what she had done before when she had stroked his cheek. Lucien could see her in his mind, that golden thread between them, and that strong cord wrapped around Elain where she had anchored herself to him. He reached out to her, tracing his fingers along her jaw slipping them beneath her chin and lifting it so that he could see her face more clearly. Satisfaction moved through him when he realised he had done it, and when he blinked and was looking at Elain again beneath the blanket, the smile on her face said that she was pleased with him too. “Getting clever with that, aren’t you.”

“Learning from you.” He breathed, his breath then catching when Elain pushed herself up on her arms, leaning up to him and he moved to meet her, kissing her gently.

“I don’t think you need to learn from me.” She whispered, and he slid a hand up the back of her neck into her hair. He didn’t think that was true, all of it seemed almost instinctual to her.

“I didn’t even know that was possible until you did it.”

She smiled again at him in a way that suggested she knew things that he did not. “What you did yesterday seemed pretty instinctual.” She said, and Lucien wondered if she wasn’t straight up reading his mind down the bond. “You will be able to do anything you can even dream of.”

He wondered if that were true, and he threaded his hand more firmly into her hair, bringing her closer to kiss her again. “This is already a dream.” He said softly when she pushed herself higher on her arms again and looked at him. 

“I’m pleased you think so.” She whispered, moving down his body again, one hand trailing down his skin, her nails raising goosebumps which spread across his chest and made their way along his arms. “Do you dream about this?” Elain’s voice had turned into a purr once more as she carefully took him in her hand. Those dark eyes lifted to meet his gaze and Lucien couldn’t so much as make a whimper of a sound in response. He knew that his heart was racing, and he knew that she had noticed. 

When she licked her lips, the tip of that pink tongue moistening them, Lucien thought he might die. He was unable to so much as move as his eyes followed Elain lowering herself to him. Her eyes remained on his face, holding his gaze, and Lucien’s heart was beating so quickly and so forcefully that he thought it might actually break its way out of his chest, as she parted those moist lips and took the length of him into her mouth. He couldn’t help the sound he made then, the low guttural noise breaking from him as his left hand clenched a handful of the sheet beneath him and his right slid into Elain’s hair. He groaned then, his head tilting back against the headboard when she began to move and he could feel her hot tongue on him. Fingers sliding carefully through Elain’s silky hair, Lucien tried to control his breathing, making sure to take slow deep breaths and then exhale them completely before drawing another. He thought he might not be able to last all that long if he allowed his breath to get away from him, and he definitely wanted this to last.


	286. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Six

**Chapter 286**

Lucien’s hand moving through Elain’s hair felt so very good and she closed her eyes, enjoying the way he stroked and caressed her. Careful to keep her movements rhythmic, Elain made sure to brace herself in order to remain comfortable and ensure she was able to continue what she was doing. Lucien’s appreciative groan told her that what she was doing was very effective and it encouraged her to keep it up. She was pleased that he was enjoying it, that what she had been thinking about since the night before had worked exactly the way that she had wanted it to. 

She was thoroughly convinced that she had the best mate in the entire world. She knew that he had been beyond exhausted yesterday, and he had still done what he had for her, more intent upon her than upon himself. It was something that she had always noticed about Lucien. He had always put the needs of others, especially her, before himself. Elain loved Lucien’s selflessness, trusted the goodness in him, and it made her heart swell. Something in her had recognised that she could trust him since the moment he had lifted her off the floor, wrapped in his jacket, after she had been dumped out of the cauldron. When he had come back here after having been away for months, she had known that he was not up to anything suspicious, no matter how many times Nesta had told her that he was probably working on ulterior motives. Elain had known deep in her core that Lucien wasn’t like that. Something in her had recognised that, and when she had accepted the bond she had been granted a more clear view of his inner workings. With access to all of him, Elain had been pleased to find out that Lucien was exactly who she had thought he was. 

It was comforting to know that her mate was more concerned with what she needed than his own desires, because she knew that if she ever truly needed him, and she had done on several occasions, that he would be there for her and she could trust him. Of course, Elain worried that he might one day end up hurting himself in his desire to take care of her. It had almost happened yesterday, she knew. He had drained himself in his efforts to keep that shield up, trying to protect her and the others in that training square. She also knew that he wouldn’t have stopped. If Cassian and Azriel hadn’t managed to take care of those Illyrians coming at them, and if Rhys hadn’t arrived, Elain knew that Lucien would have pushed himself even further. It could have killed him, she knew that. He would have let the shield suck everything from him, and Elain knew that he would have let it suck him dry, let it kill him, before he gave up and let it fall. She knew that his desire to protect her, to take care of her, went beyond his sense of self-preservation and, while the idea of that was romantic in theory, it did scare her beyond anything ever had that he would let himself die if he thought it would keep her safe. She didn’t want that. Elain knew that she would never be able to live and move on with her life if she ever lost Lucien, so there would be no point. She hoped that situation never arose, that it never eventuated. But, knowing that her mate was like that was comforting and she felt utterly safe with him. 

When his hand tightened in her hair and she felt his hips lift a little from the mattress, Elain opened her eyes and lifted her gaze to watch him. Lucien’s head was tilted back and she could see his jaw was tense. His other hand was gripping the sheets tightly and it was clear to her that she’d brought him to the edge of his pleasure. Reaching for him down the bond then, Elain was careful to continue doing what she had been with her mouth, keeping her movements even, while she reached up in her mind and thought about how it felt to rake her fingers down his chest. Her actual hands remained at her mate’s hips, bracing herself over him, but he moaned loudly as if he actually had just scratched long red marks across his skin and Elain had to try extremely hard to not lose her focus on her actions. Lucien continued to groan, his hips lifting again. The sounds he emitted made Elain’s heart race even more than it already was, and her blood pumped loudly through her body, heating quickly. She listened to her mate’s heartbeat, in sync with hers, and she couldn’t help letting out a groan of her own. 

“Perfect mate…” Lucien breathed, his grip on her hair shifting. Both of his hands then were on her head and Elain allowed him to begin guiding her movements, knowing that he was nearly there. She let out another groan, happy that he was so pleased, her own hands now stroking his hops, enjoying his smooth skin. Carefully, she moved, listening intently to every sound that Lucien made, and she knew just when he had reached that edge, and when he tumbled over with a loud cry, she made sure to continue exactly what she had been doing until he went silent and still, unable to do anything but breathe deeply as he tried to catch his breath. She stopped then, sliding her hands up his chest as she moved to lay beside him. “Perfect mate…” he repeated, his arm sliding around her and cuddling her close.


	287. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Seven

**Chapter 287**

Elain and wanted to stay where she was, curled against Lucien’s side with her head on his shoulder. She could have, she thought. She could have stayed there all day, but then she had heard movement out in the hallway and she knew that Feyre and Rhys were up. Lucien had pressed a kiss to her cheek, his warm hand moving up and down her back and he had whispered to her that they would have stayed if they wanted to, but that if she wanted to go back to the Day Court they did need to get up. 

Also, Elain recalled, she had promised Feyre that they would speak at breakfast, and she couldn’t do that if she remained in bed. It would be the last time she would get to see and speak to her sister for a while, she knew, and she didn’t want to miss out on it. As she had gotten dressed and brushed he hair, Elain wondered how frequently Feyre and Nests would find time to visit the Day Court. Nesta would have the time, she supposed, whenever her sister wanted to come, but Feyre was the High Lady of the Night Court and she knew that the position had come with responsibilities. They would make time, Elain knew. The three of them were important to one another, and Elain knew that they would all make time to see one another. Feyre would visit whenever she had the time and, while she didn’t know where Nesta would be making her home, she knew that her elder sister would be frequent guest of the Day Court. 

“What are our responsibilities back home?” Elain asked, looking at her mate in the mirror as she braided her hair up about her head like a golden brown crown. Lucien approached her, coming to stand behind her as he held her eyes in the mirror. 

“Why’s that, Petal?” he asked. 

Elain finished the braid and pinned it in place. “I… you’re the heir, and I am your mate.” She said, “I know that those positions will come with responsibilities and time commitments…”

“That’s true…” Lucien agreed, nodding. Elain blinked and she just looked at him. She watched him pluck several small orchid flowers from a stem sitting in a vase on her vanity. He then began arranging them in her hair, tucking the stems into her braid so it looked as if she wore a flowered crown. Elain’s heart fluttered at that thought, and the look of concentration that settled onto his face as he focused on what he was doing. 

“I was thinking about my sisters.” She told him, unable to take her eyes away from his clever hands as he worked. “I know that they will visit when they can, but I was wondering about what kind of time I will have to visit them…”

“My love…” Lucien said, his eyes shifting from the braid to meet hers once more in the mirror. “You will be able to visit them whenever you like.” He smiled at her, “I am the heir, and I will have things that I will be compelled to see to. But, you will not be held to the same obligations. As my mate you will have the chance to do many things that may not have been options to you before. Having eyes on you in that way gives you a voice… you will be able to use that power however you like… but you won’t have to be as involved in the politics of it all like I will be.”

“Will I not?”

“No. You will be welcome at gatherings and official visits, of course, but if you chose to not be present because you wanted to see your sisters, nobody would say a thing…”

“I will have more freedom than you will…” She tilted her head, her eyes holding Lucien’s intense gaze. 

“Indeed you will, Petal.”

“Are you okay with that?”

“How could I not be okay with you being free?”

“No, I meant with the fact that you will have obligations that prevent you having freedom…”

“I…” she watched him think for a few moments, “I think having my mother there, and you… and the chance to know Helion as my father… a home… all of that makes up for having to attend meetings.” He smiled then, “Besides, I have always enjoyed those. Now, I won’t just be representing someone else and their power. Now, I will have the chance to make a difference, I have the power to make choices and get things done.”

Elain turned in her chair to look up at him. “Do you have ideas already?” She could feel his excitement down the bond, and she liked that he was so excited.

“Do you remember?” he began, “I once told you about a book I was reading about the stories of those who had escaped the war and moved among the Courts of Prythian through trade fairs as they searched for work and a place to find it?”

“I do…” Elain said. “It was interesting that fairs like that were necessary… and that so many faeries were displaced. I hadn’t known that.”

“Indeed.” He said, nodding as his metallic eye clicked and whirred and Elain could just about see his brain thinking. “I… I think that I would like to follow up with them. We could begin those fairs again, not for the movement of fairies, but to go with the trade routes. Trading not just goods, but services that these talented faeries and craftspeople can offer. If that leads to new opportunities for them, even better…”

“That sounds wonderful.”

“If possible, I would like to track down those who shared their stories last time and see how they have gotten on…”

“Is that possible?”

“I don’t see why not.” He held a hand out to her, and Elain took it. She let him pull her to her feet and then she heard Feyre calling them from down the stairs. “I suppose we shall have to pack after breakfast.” He smiled at her and Elain nodded her agreement. They would, she knew, be home in the Day Court within the hour.


	288. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Eight

**Chapter 288**

The warmth of the sun pleased Lucien in a way that he hadn’t anticipated upon their return to the Day Court. Growing up in the Autumn Court, he had always rather found the brightness and the heat of the Day Court to be a lot. He remembered squinting as a youngling, trying to limit his activities during the midday hours whenever he had come here as an Emissary. It had not been something he had particularly enjoyed but now he revelled in it. He strode beside Elain now, his eyes closed and his face turned upward with a smile across his lips.

“Are you soaking in the light?” His mate sounded curious enough that Lucien opened his eyes and looked down at her. He blinked at the look on her face when he saw the awe in her eyes. “You’re… shining.”

“Am I?” he felt warm, and like he had been recharged. He hadn’t felt this energised since before he’d tried to hold that shield. 

“You know the way that Helion does…”

“Yes…” he had often noted the way that the High Lord of the Day Court often shone with an inner light. “Am… am I doing that?”

Elain nodded, her eyes still on him. “You are…” she slipped her hand into his and he held it gently. “Also you feel warm…”

“I…” Lucien considered as he walked, “I feel better…” he said, “I feel rested and energised…”

“By being in the sun?”

“Maybe…” he squeezed her hand, making a mental note to ask Helion about it when he had the time. If he was somehow able to draw energy and power from the sun here, then Lucien didn’t know where the limit for what he could do would be. If he was in the sun in other Courts, would that have the same effect? Did he somehow now have an endless supply of energy. If the sun had been shining more brightly in that Illyrian camp, would he have been able to draw from it and hold that shield indefinitely?

“Like a flower…” Elain was grinning at him and he raised an eyebrow at her. 

“Oh?”

“Yes.” She said, “Put in the sun for long enough, and you grow and bloom and become strong and beautiful…”

“If you say so, my love.” He was actually supremely pleased by her comparison. If she wanted to compare him to the things in the world that she loved the most, then he was complexly okay with that. 

“I love you more.” She said, and he raised an eyebrow at her. 

“Did you hear that thought?” he asked, and she gave a half shrug. 

“Not in words, but the general gist…”

“Ah…”

“It’s true though.” She said. “I love flowers… everyone knows that. Gardens are wonderful… and I completely intend to make them all over Helion’s palace.” She grinned at him, “But I love you way more… and my sisters…”

“I know that, Petal.” He stopped walking and pulled her around, bringing his free hand up to her cheek and tilting her face up to himself. “Of course I know that.”

She smiled up at him and Lucien very much enjoyed the look that she gave him when his fingers brushed her cheekbone. “I’m going to plant you some dahlias.” She told him, and he grinned more widely than he had all day. Of course she would remember his favourites, and he knew that if anyone was able to make Autumn Court flowers bloom in the Day Court it would be Elain. She had gotten Spring Court flowers to thrive in the Night Court, after all.

“I look forward to that, my sweet.”

She smiled at him, and her smile was nearly as brilliant as the sun. For a moment, Lucien wondered if he was able to draw power from that smile as well as he could apparently do from the sun. He wouldn’t be surprised if he could. They slowly continued to walk, their joined hands swinging between them as they continued up the street and toward his father’s palace. His palace. This was his home, Lucien realised. They were home, and he was excited for what exactly this would mean for himself and Elain. 

“Do you know what Dahlias mean?” Elain asked him as they walked, and Lucien slanted a glance her way. “As all flowers have a meaning…”

“I know that they have meanings.” He told her, “But I don’t think I know what Dahlias specifically mean…”

Elain was smiling to herself as they walked and he tried to read her expression as he waited for her to explain. “It is said,” she began “That they represent empowerment. That they are a reminder than even one person can make a difference.” Lucien rather liked that, and went to say so, but Elain went on, “Dahlias remind you that you are powerful and only you can fulfill your life’s purpose. They help you realise that being powerful doesn’t mean being pushy or threatening. You can make positive life changes by being in balance. You have an amazing light within you, and you need to accept it so that others can enjoy your beauty.”

“Really?” He asked, “That’s the meaning of Dahlias?”

“It is.” Elain smiled at him, “Perhaps that is why they have been your favourites. You were meant to learn their message, and heed it.”

“Well, considering my mate is always surrounded by flowers and better at growing them than anyone I’ve ever met, perhaps you were always meant to tell me their meaning.”

“The Cauldron really thought of everything, didn’t it?” she murmured, and Lucien nodded. He rather thought that Elain was right. It did seem as if the Cauldron had foreseen all of this. He should have known that when Helion had told him that when the Cauldron Made Elain Fae and gave her the gifts of a Seer, it also provided her with him so that he could save her from madness.

“Yes, Petal.” He said softly. “It would seem that it did.”


	289. Chapter Two Hundred and Eighty-Nine

**Chapter 289**

Walking into Helion’s throne room was much the same as it had been when they had first come to the Day Court. Elain couldn’t help but look at all the finery and breezy clothing that the High Lord of the Day Court and his courtiers were wearing. She rather liked all the Lapis Lazuli and Turquoise. She thought that the blues of those stones, and the reds of the Carnelian and Jasper were perfect accents for all of the gold that Helion seemed to favour in the decoration of his palace.

Dozens of pairs of eyes followed Elain and Lucien when they came in the doors and made their way toward the Dais upon which sat the High Lord of the Day Court. Elain spotted Ashk standing nearby, and the warmth in the older faerie’s face when a smile spread across it made Elain take another look. She had once thought that Ashk would have been even more beautiful than she was before whatever had happened to her to make her sad had occurred. Now, it looked as if whatever that had been had never taken place. Ashk looked beyond radiant, and devastatingly beautiful. It was clear that being free of Beron, and being able to openly and happily be with Helion, was the cause for this drastic change. Down the bond, Elain felt Lucien’s reaction to his mother, and she knew that her mate had noticed this difference himself. 

“Son and heir.” Helion said, leaning forward on his throne with a smile when they came to the bottom of the Dais. Those amber eyes shifted then, “Elain…” he said when he looked at her for a moment before his gaze returned to Lucien. “You have returned.”

“Indeed…” Elain felt Lucien glancing around, and she could feel him wondering if Helion was going to want to be informed of what had occurred while they stood here with everyone listening in on them. “We did achieve all we had set out to do, and now have come…” Lucien paused then, drawing a quick breath before the release of the next word, “… home.”

Helion’s smile was as bright as the sun, and Elain felt warmth surround them. “Home.” The High Lord replied, nodding his head. “And we are glad to have you return.” Golden eyes swept the hall, taking in all who were present. “We shall celebrate.” He announced, “This evening we shall have a fine feast to celebrate how thankful and pleased we are that my son and heir has returned home with his mate.”

Elain cast a sidelong look at Lucien, wanting to see his reaction to Helion’s dramatics. They had chosen to come back here, to live here and begin their lives together here, but she knew that it would take them both some time to get used to the High Lord’s flair for the dramatic. Elain wondered just how real this behaviour was. Was it truly Helion’s nature, or was it some kind of mask he wore as the High Lord for whatever reason? She supposed that she would find out in time.

“You do honour us.” Lucien was saying once Helion had finished declaring how wonderful the feast would be. 

“You and I will spend some time catching up on what is happening in the other Courts that you visited, and then you may retire to your rooms to rest and prepare for the evening feast.”

“Thank you.” Lucien said, giving a slight bow. Elain did the same, waiting for them to be dismissed. 

*

He had noticed the way that the faeries of the Day Court watched himself and Elain, and he was trying his best to ignore it. It wasn’t as if those around them didn’t always look at Elain, it had been something that Lucien had tried to get used to. Since he had returned to spend more time with her and get to know her better, he had noticed that males tended to watch her as she passed. It wasn’t even out of some awful desire that would cause Lucien’s blood to boil, sometimes they just liked her. He’d had to grow accustomed to that in the Night Court when just about everybody he passed had smiled or waved at Elain, and it hadn’t stopped since then. 

Lucien knew that Elain was well liked. She had been everywhere they had gone. It seemed as if she drew those around her toward her, and he knew that it was something he was going to have to deal with. Still, he couldn’t help noticing the eyes that followed her, and he couldn’t help the irritation that grew within him. This was his father’s Court, and it was to be his one day. Either he would have to get used to eyes following his mate everywhere she went, or he would have to put a stop to it. Lucien wondered if he said anything to Helion, whether his father would do something about it, say something to his Court, or if he would tell Lucien to get a grip of himself. Lucien didn’t know, but he resolved himself to ask when he met with Helion within the hour. They had been dismissed to go and change and prepare themselves for the afternoon. Lucien was to meet Helion and fill him in on all that had occurred since they had left, and Elain was to have time to herself, no doubt she would be in the gardens. 

The moment they walked into their suite, Elain crossed the room and threw the doors to their gardens open. He watched his mate smile, taking in the afternoon sun and the light breeze that now entered the room. 

“So, you’ve already found something to do for the afternoon…?” he teased, and Elain looked at him over her shoulder. 

“Indeed…” She gestured toward the wardrobe, “Will you be donning Day Court attire for your meeting with Helion?”

Lucien figured that was a good idea. “Seems the respectable thing to do…”

“Good.” Elain gave him a wide smile, and he knew then that she just wanted to be able to look at him in the short tunic. He winked at her and moved to change.


	290. Chapter Two Hundred and Ninety

**Chapter 290**

The garden was lovelier than Elain had imagined it might be. Ashk had told her that the city had some beautiful public gardens and she had spent the afternoon wandering around the city on her own, looking for them. The Day Court had some similarities to the Night Court in that faeries had their own businesses and the city seemed to be undergoing some changes. When she had stopped at a small bakery for a little snack, as wandering around was hungry work, Elain had spoken to the female behind the counter. It seemed that since Amarantha had been defeated and the High Lords released from under the mountain, the Court had begun to flourish once more. They had more freedoms now, and felt safer about building their lives. Elain supposed that they’d been somewhat in hiding waiting for it all to be over once Amarantha had come and plundered the Court’s libraries searching for secrets to improve upon her power. The faerie had directed Elain toward the closest public garden, and Elain had found it soon enough. 

As she entered the garden, her eyes swept the area. There was a lush grassy lawn surrounded by blooming garden beds. Again, there was an array of yellows and golds, sunflowers and marigolds everywhere, and accenting those were flowers of blues and reds which reminded Elain of the jewellery that much of the Court wore. This garden relished in the sunlight, and Elain was pleasantly surprised. She hadn’t expected a garden like this. She had, she realised, no real idea of what she had expected. Perhaps a rock garden with a few hardy plants here and there for a spot of greenery, but this exceeded all of her expectations. It was, Elain figured, much like all the faerie Courts of Prythian. Each one had surpassed her expectations and was more beautiful than she had imagined. 

Smiling as she strolled across the lawns, Elain let her eyes move along the garden beds. There was a large tree nearby, and she headed for it, hoping to sit beneath its branches in a little bit of shade. It would take her some time, she supposed, to get used to the sun and its intensity in the Day Court. It had appeared earlier that Lucien was able to recharge and draw power from it, but Elain was not the child of the High Lord of the Day Court, and the sun did not have the same effect on her body. For a moment she wondered if that might change. She was Lucien’s mate, after all. The Cauldron had decided that she would be the mate of the heir to the Day Court, and one day Lucien would be the High Lord. Would the sun have a different effect on her then? She didn’t know, but she figured that one day she would find out. For now, she wanted to sit in the shade for a while and hope that she would cool down. 

Sinking down against the trunk of the tree, Elain found herself pulling the little book that Lucien had given her from her pocket and turning to a new page. She pulled a small pencil out and focused on the nearby garden beds. She couldn’t help herself, she realised, smiling as she found herself beginning to sketch a red flower she was unfamiliar with. She was no longer compiling a collection of flowers for a book, but this had sort of become a habit for her, and she found it relaxing. Maybe it was a habit that she would keep. It was enjoyable and she was rather impressed with the way that her artistic skills had grown since she had begun. 

By the time she was adding the final shading touches to her flower, Elain had cooled down enough to feel comfortable once more and then she looked up when a bright voice sounded nearby. 

“Hello…”

Elain smiled, her eyes finding a female faerie standing close to the garden. A smile met hers in response and the faerie took a small step closer. Elain quickly looked her over, trying to judge if there was any threat. The faerie had smooth olive skin which suggested she spent quite some time in the sun, and shiny black hair. Her eyes were golden, and Elain thought that she looked rather friendly. “Hello…” she said in response. The faerie smiled more widely. 

“Are you drawing the gardens?”

“I am…” Elain set her book in her lap, still leaning back against the tree. She could see the curiosity in those golden eyes and she tilted her head. “Are you… also… interested in the gardens?”

“Oh, I would think so.” The faerie replied, coming even closer, “I tend to them from time to time…”

“Do you?” Elain asked, “Is that your job?”

“Sometimes.” The reply was hesitant, “I also sell flowers… I have a little shop not far from here.”

“Oh?” Elain smiled, “That sounds lovely.” It was something she had often dreamed of doing when she had been mortal. If she and her sisters had been forced to get work, she had always claimed that she would sell flowers.

“It can be…” the faerie took another step closer, “I’ve not seen you here before… and I do come here every day…”

“I’ve never been here before.”

“Oh, well I’m glad that you found the place. It’s one of the nicest gardens in the city.” The faerie smiled at her again, bushing her black hair back over one slim shoulder. “I’m Sheera.”

“Elain…” Elain said, watching as Sheera’s golden eyes widened in recognition of her name.

“Oh!”

“You know my name, then.” Elain said, feeling relief at the fact that it had been a surprise for the other female. She was less wary of the fact that Sheera had been interested in her before she’d worked out that she was Lucien’s mate.

“I have heard… the High Lord now has an heir… and… he has a mate.”

“Indeed.” Elain folded her hands together, smiling as Sheera came closer and sank down onto the grass nearby. 

“You’re to live here then?”

“It would seem so.”

“You would be interested in the other gardens around the city?”

“I would.” Elain watched Sheera’s face light up at that.

“I could show you. I know where they all are, and I go to them frequently to help keep them maintained. As a reward for that, I am permitted to take some of the flowers for my shop…” There was genuine warmth in the other female’s face and voice, and Elain found herself smiling in response. 

“I would be thankful to have the company.” She said, truly liking the idea of being shown where all of these gardens were. 

“Would you want to draw some of the other flowers?” Sheera asked, “I… I have a copy of the book you released of the flowers from the different Courts.”

“You do?” Elain suddenly grew nervous. It wasn’t a wary nervousness, but more connected to the fact that she didn’t think she had met anyone yet who had read her book before meeting her. Everyone so far that she had known had read her book, Elain had known beforehand. “Did you like it?”  
Sheera beemed at her, a flash of white teeth in the shade. “Very much. I would like to see the Winter Court.” She said, “That Eisblume flower looks magnificent.”

“It was lovely.” Elain agreed, happiness spreading throughout her. “I am so pleased that you liked it.”

“Are you drawing these for another book?”

“Ah,” Elain shook her head, “I have no plans at the moment for another book of the same nature, but I did grow to enjoy drawing the flowers. It helps me relax.”

“That makes sense.” Sheera nodded, golden eyes sweeping the gardens. “Just being here helps me relax.” Elain understood that. Being in gardens had always had that effect on her.

The pair sat in silence for a few minutes and Elain found herself eyeing Sheera surreptitiously. She liked the way that Sheera sat, eyes closed and face turned upwards, enjoying the light breeze that was making its way across the lawns. It had been a while since she had spent time with someone when she didn’t have to be a Seer or a proper Lady, or representing the Night Court, her sister, Rhys, or the Day Court. She didn’t have to be anyone here except herself; someone who liked gardens and flowers. She could feel that Sheera was the same in that regard. 

“You come here every day?” She asked the other female, and Sheera nodded, golden eyes opening and turning her way.

“I do.” Sheera paused then, those eyes looking Elain over for a moment, “Will I see you here again?”

“Yes,” Elain nodded, smiling gently, “I think you will.”


End file.
